Good pm to y'all. The Detty December Fest is about to be litty lit in Lagos with headliners like Summer Walker, Latto, Young Thug et al. Should I start with the concert lineups by our Nigerian artistes too? It's a back-to-back something, I joke you not!! I am jealous of those in Lagos at this cusp cause why are y'all the only ones having ample fun every December? 😂😹😆
Meanwhile, who saw the drone shots of Lagos traffic as put out by Niyi Fagbemi on Instagram some minutes ago with an inscription that says, "Lagos in one month time" or so?
IJGBs be doing the most, no cap!
The traffic jam/gridlock/go slow as the case may be was absolutely insane!! I think the shots are from last year but I ain't sure though.

Get groovy groovy and jumpy jumpy today cos it's allowed.

TGIF!!!!!!!!!!!!! 🔥🔥🔥🔥💥💥💥💥

Game Night Friyay To The Rescue-Scrabble

Rearrange the letters below to form a meaningful word

I E F D E C I

Cheers to the weekend, my guys 🥂


It's been a busy week. I hope we're all doing fine. Wishing everyone a relaxing weekend. Stay safe. Goodnight!


©️ TEEJAY

Long amebo

There was this Coperni glass bag that rapper Doja Cat and the Kad_Jenner sisters rocked that year. Immediately my fashionista neighbor in former house saw the bag online she started a special ajo just to buy it. Which las las she got it

Later later, she met a man on the 🔥 app. He invited her over and sent her transport money. She ordered Uber and went to the hotel address he sent

According to what she shared with me , when she arrived, the guy told her he had already checked into another hotel nearby, so she should take a bike to meet him at the hotel junction. She did. On getting there he was no where to be found. Instead he asked her to enter a keke napep into the estate where the hotel was located. She did again and they met finally

After all the walka walka upandan na so this girl realize say she don enter another state entirely . She only discovered after seeing the address for the hotel signboard

She became very angry and accused the guy of misleading her. The guy beg oo but she insisted she no fit do another 30 mins for that kind village and she want go home ASAP.

As the guy want hold her hand and calm her down, she struggled to free her hand from his grip which made her expensive glass bag to slip, hit a protruding stone 🪨 and cracked badly

She started tantruming saying he must pay for the bag. When the guy heard the cost, he said he go pay instalmrntally, but he go first try to repair am. He tool her to a bag maker in the big market who managed to fix it, but the fixing no neat at all. He gave her half the cost of the bag and still paid for her tp back home. He asked her send account number for the balance, so that he go pay when he get money

However , because of bottled up anger, this girl spat directly in his face in the middle of the market before leaving .

A few days later, she started smelling like rötten fish.

That time, I was in the hospital collecting treatment for my injured leg. Our neighbors who visited started telling me the landlord had suddenly served the bag girl a quit notice

Days later, she called me saying she wanted to see my pastor. The same pastor I had always preached to her about but the man was out of the country then

So she came straight to the hospital to meet me and asked for my anointing oil.

When this girl entered my ward, everywhere begin gba 👃🏻. The smell no be here

She started narrating the strange things happening to her. She said sometimes she go dey alone but hear many voices screaming her name at once and laughing out loud. One time she entered bike alone and suddenly felt someone behind her pulling and dragging her new braids. Abi na when she cook food to eat and the food turned into soft foam inside pot

She believed the guy she insulted was responsible, but the problem was that he had stopped answering her calls and he would read her texts without responding

I collected her phone and texted the guy myself, using a particular communication trick my grandma taught me

Immediately, he called

Omo… the first thing this guy mentioned was the exact name of the orthopedic hospital where I was 😲

I started begging him on behalf of the girl and myself. I asked if it was something we could settle financially

Guy said money was not the issue. According to him, the girl disgraced him publicly in front of his people by spitting on him. That where he came from, people only spit publicly when a rejected corpse is being carried to the evil forest

Spitting near a living person was forbidden and also a taboo in his community

That was why he did her 'back to sender' so she too would smell like a dead body and most people go reject her and spit everywhere she enter

He explained that he was in the city b4b4, but work brought him back to his community. And anytime he invited a girl over, she always refused after hearing na village he dey stay. That was why he used cunny cunny to make my neighbor visit am, because him don like her finish

In my mind I was like 'Una no get girls for that una village?'🙄

Seeing everything going on, I cannot believe that for whatever reason, there are still people that support this APC government!

It’s sickening!

What else do they have to do to you to actually lose your support? Kill your loved ones?

Thank God for the weekend
Resting mode has been activated for me. 😊

After almost a week of begging him. He finally forgave her. He said but for the smell to stop, something had to be done. By this time I'd been discharged from the hospital

He instructed her to buy native salt, kola nuts, control onions, uyayak, iru and ogiri okpeyi along with other traditional items, and give them to a beggar.

He warned that not even my 1 kobo or anybody else's must be added to money the girl would use purchasing the items.


I asked whether it should be pikin beggar, adult beggar, young, old, deaf, dumb or blind beggar. He insisted it must be a grandma beggar with plenty of grey hair. 🧓🏿

He also said that she was lucky cos them don schedule for her to run mad and be moving stark NiKiD within 5 days. And no man of God or of Satan would have been able to deliver her

I managed to escort her to the nearby market. We had never seen a beggar in that area, weda kid or adult beggar so our plan was to get the items then enter bike to H*u*a quarter where plenty of beggars used to hang

We bought everything and were about to leave the market

Just as we want cross road, an elderly, barefoot, bare chested woman tying wrapper and carrying over due grey shuku suddenly appeared from nowhere and stood directly in front of us . In her shaky voice she asked 'where is it?." In our local dialect, but with a strong accent

Immediately, the girl handed her the items. Next she asked 'money nko?' the girl gave her the money we suppose use for bike

With our hearts pounding, we hurriedly crossed to the other side of the road and turned back to check where the woman go enter
Everywhere clear.
We didn't see her

Small time,vmy neighbor's phone rang, it was the guy calling. He said 'Go and sin no more you never know who you might meet next time.'

He ended the call

People of God, una need to see this guy’s WhatsApp DP 🪼🧜🏻‍♀️👻☠️👺👹

Leave am. These girls get mind

The smell later stopped. The landlord even called her back say he don cancel the quit notice . But she later moved out on her own . Before moving out she said she wanted to thank the boy one last time so we called his number but it never connected. He deleted his WhatsApp account 👤. She enter her 🔥 app but he don deactivate. She relocated. Na so this one happen

Today she is a Sister GO in one popular church

Hey bestie, it’s mum Raheem here.

Just sitting down here, reminiscing about something.
I remember when my hubby and I would just decide on a Friday night, “ Let’s go out small.” No plans, no stress. We would just enter the car, go eat and drink something nice, drive around Lagos, and laugh like we had no worries in this world.
Now,if I say “Let’s go out,” my husband will look at me, look at Raheem , and look at me again.🤣
Life has really changed, but honestly, I miss those carefree nights sha.

I am sooo tired😫

Stella,

I saw you and I just want to say you are very beautiful. You are a statuesque woman with a beautiful figure. 😁

N.B. Just a lady admiring another lady.

Please family, remember this brother in your prayers. I am not happy as I am still single. My friend celebrated his son's first birthday and I felt left behind. I want to settle down before December. I need a wife. Please pray for me.

King Duala 🤴

Una Good evening oo
Hope you had a successful day and week already,mine dikwa stressful,busy but it was a week of surplus👋🏼👋🏼,gradually we are entering seasonal sales✌🏼
I said Glo baby,today's Chicken suya na must oo😅,although I'm done downloading everything and ended it with mixed fruit juice🥤prepared by i, and me
Lying down here surfing the net till my phone fall off my hand😅
Dalukwanu umu Nne m🥰
I come in peace 🕊️

Just got out of online teaching class, it's been a hectic week, chai! making money aint an easy task.
Baba God, please bless our hustle.

Good evening everyone.

I'm feeling nostalgic tonight , came to YouTube to watch Osuofia's "I go chop your dollar" and I'm still get almost 3hours later watching old school jams. I can't believe songs from 10/14 years ago are now considered old school.

Getting ready to go to my second job. You all enjoy your detty December with your detty president, governors, senators, local government chairmen and house of reps members. Una no go ever learn Nigerians. Make una keep on suffering and smiling. Detty December my foot.