NARRATIVE NUMBER ONE
CONFUSED AND IN LOVE
Hi Stella and blog visitors. I'll make this so brief and understandable.
I am a 19 year old graduate from a prestigious university and am
currently doing my masters hopefully to round off by February.
Here is my dilemma. I have always been a good girl to my parents all
through my life and I have never given them any hassle whatsoever. It
all came to a surprise when I told my folks I wanted to get married
since am through with my studies -like they always wanted.
At first it sounded like a joke and they didn't take it seriously as they haven't
seen me bring a guy home talk more of talking to one.
Now my mum asked me to bring the guy let her access him for herself
and the next day I brought in my boyfriend whom I have secretly been
dating throughout my fourth year in school till now. The moment my mom
saw him she gave me a terrified look and I understood immediately.
Why you might ask. Because he is far older than I am with 22 year age
gap. I tried reasoning with her but she said nothing like marriage is
going to take place between the both of us.
I really love my parents and don't want to go against their wish. I
also love this guy so much.
I am seriously confused as no one understands me, even my friends and
siblings are at loggerheads with me because of this issue. I want to
know the ideal age gap for a couple.
Do I sound desperate?
Please I really need your red pen Stella and would appreciate it if
you all advise me as your younger sister as I don't have any sis.
You are 19yrs old and he is what?41years old?
My goodness and he started dating you at what age?....Just how experienced are you to handle Marriage at this age?I know they say age is nothing but a number but that only applies when both have had experiences and come together to prove that 'just a number thing'
I think you should wait a year or two before you go ahead and think carefully about this oh..most age gap like this also comes with communication gap and break down and by then it will be too late.
Can you playfully tell him to shut up?can you crack jokes with him?
Is he your friend?does he impose things on you?
NARRATIVE NUMBER TWO
A FATHER WHO DOESNT PRACTICE WHAT HE PREACHES.
Hi ma'am keep doing what you do best.
While growing up my dad used to warn us the girls out of six children that if by chance we get pregnant he will disown us. We grew up with that in mind as he constantly reminded us. Any guy I dated I made sure that he is someone that will not bail on me when it happens. When my sister gave birth and came home to show him the child, he said it is because my sister is married that is the only reason he touched him.
The reason for my narration is that my dad after his strict warnings had 3 children out of wedlock with two different women that are after 2 and 4 respectively. It so painful that he didn't have them with some one that has never been married but divorced women. This is a man that according to my mom when she was pregnant with her last child he told her he does not need more children hence an abortion which she refused.
He is 24years old while the first of his other children is 9years. He claims my mum pushed him outside. Outside. He complains every time that we do not ask of the children up-to the extent that if we need anything from him just to soften his mind we'll ask about them because that became his mumu button. Before now he used to tell us that we should take care of the children but now he is saying that all his properties will be willed to them that he has given us education since he will not be around to take care of the children.
This is a grandfather of 4 children. Didn't he think about is age before he had then? Didn't the women know that he already had grown ups before opening their legs for him and to the extent of getting pregnant?
Or probably they taught they could get money from him because of the small change he has but they miscalculated because he is the type that can buy a full cartoon of beer than to give you the money equivalent. So now all the things we went through together as a family will now be enjoyed by his bastard children and their useless and shameless mothers?I personally cannot and will not accept them not because its their fault but the mindset of my father.
I have told him to marry the women to make the children legitimate because am just playing by his rules not that my words mean anything to him by the way. This is a case of do what I say but not what I do. My dad use to embarrass my sisters and I when ever he sees us with any guy except our neighbors which he will looks with bad eyes.
Please I need advice on how to go about it because all my siblings are still struggling that we still ask him for financial help. We suffered before God blessed. I know they have the right to their fathers inheritance but is too painful that he disrespected my mom a woman who stood by him when he had nothing with different women but these two felt they were wise and decided to get pregnant for a granpa. Please do advice. Thanks ma'am for the platform.
Let me read comments please