Stella Dimoko Korkus.com: Chronicle Of Blog Visitor Narrative..

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Sunday, November 27, 2016

Chronicle Of Blog Visitor Narrative..

Even Pastor?Ehen!!!



STAND ALONE NARRATIVE
CONFUSED BRIDE TO BE...

Hey Stella love,
Please post my story under chronicles,I am very confused right now and I need you and my fellow bvs input asap.
I met my man 3 months ago from a mutual friend.He is soft spoken and nice.Before we got to meet,we had started talking over the phone where he stated what he wanted,which is to marry me,meanwhile he's a pastor so we agreed to be celibate until our wedding night.


It got confusing which of the wedding nights though,either traditional or white,so we settled for traditional.
Since we agreed no sex,I have never visited his house and though I was skeptical but it was OK since I knew in a few months time we would be getting married.At first, I didn't really love him which was okay because I wanted the feelings for him to grow which it did with time and still growing.


Presently I am not working and he is,so he provides for most of the things I need and he made me to understand that I will work soon because he won't be able to provide for us alone which I am OK with, cause I am not a lazy person but I haven't been lucky with getting a job.


I noticed something about him though,he is too jealous,always accusing me of seeing other men which is not true.I have been true to him cause he's the type of man I have been praying and asking God for.


But this his character has gotten to the worse,every single day we quarrel over irrelevant issues,if it's not the way I looked at him,it's why I didn't answer his call or why I didnt tell him I was going out in the day.Each time I tell him I am going for a job interview he gets sad and uneasy.


The last one that got me mad was the last interview I went for,instead of asking how the interview went,he said it's only me that can explain where I went to that I wasn't picking his calls.That day,it was raining as I left the company I went for the interview,being that my phone was on silent,I didn't hear it ring but when I saw the missed calls,tried calling him back but he didn't pick so when I checked my messages and saw the message he had sent me,I got really upset.I told him a piece of my mind,not only that he doubts my being true to him,he doubts everything I say to him.


And I don't tell lies to him,I have never cause I am a believer of starting a relationship on a good foundation.Have spoken to his parents about this traits,they just keep laughing and saying this is marriage and he's just in love with me that's why.


Please is this how my marriage should be?Should it be this turbulent at first?Should I continue with the preparations cause I am really scared of getting married to him now.


I intend travelling out soon for studies which he said he's in support of ,but is he really?Would he's character stop after we are married?
Please sorry for the long epistle,am just confused. (Mind you,I have always asked him if there's anything I have done to him to warrant this,he's answer is always No)Right now we ain't communicating and I have decided not calling him,he needs to learn to respect me. which from this his behaviour, he doesn't.
Thanks Stella love for this platform,I love you,we all do.


Honestly? he is an insecure man to behave like this..Maybe you should arrange for a heart to heart talk and tell him you would opt out if he doesnt change how he addresses you or doesnt trust you
Sometimes this type of jealousy goes overboard after Marriage.

Why are you marrying him and going abroad to study where he cant monitor you?wont he take his accusations overboard when he cant reach you?I dont know much you want to get married but please thread carefully darling.
Any Marriage built on this foundation is DEAD ON ARRIVAL.





160 comments:

  1. Replies
    1. Hehehe, Stella your heading got me opening chronicles so fast! Thought it'll be something very juicy sef.
      Pastors are human beings too aii, don't see the surprise here.

      Poster, can your marriage survive long distance? Seeing as your man has trust issues.
      And yes, he'll only get worse after marriage.

      Delete
    2. Pls don't marry this guy oo..else u won't have peace of mind ,a word is enough for the wise

      Delete
    3. The foundation of the relationship is even faulty...
      Please don't put urself in a fix cos u want to marry.
      Let go n let God...... That man is not the right one for you.
      BTW, anyone can be a pastor....so is no big deal.

      Delete
    4. He's a cheat liar insecure and unstable

      Delete
    5. Dude is over possessive and very insecure and with time after marriage, it will progress to slaps and emotional abuse. If he cannot trust you now then what is the point getting married? It is not like he has caught you with another man so wtf is his problem?
      Poster, shine your eyes. If you ask me, I do not think you should marry this man at least yet. Date him some more and see if he changes otherwise, my sister- movement.

      Delete
    6. Pastor for that matter..I just dey laugh. A pastore should know better... Na only GOD know who dey serve am. Mattew 7 vs 21 to 23.... Mattew 24 to 24. That's all I can say.

      Delete
    7. One chance loading...
      The signs! The signs! *sighs*

      Delete
    8. *Summary:

      Is it truth that a jealous lover will change after marriage, because the fear of another man will snatch her will no longer be there?
      We are in this together, one of the questions I have not been able to answer over the years, bring it onnnnn.

      Delete
    9. Poster, he is obsessed with you and not in love with you.
      Someone like him can be abusive later in the marriage.
      The earlier you make him respect you the better for you. If you start worshipping him like a mini god buy obeying every command he gives you, he will turn you to his slave.
      This is the time to stand up for your right

      Delete
    10. Men are naturally jealous, I don't see anything wrong with him, please marry him.
      Stella, pastors no be human beings? Lol

      Delete
    11. Poster, you are not married to him. I know who you're talking about. He's a Pastor and very possessive. He won't ask for sex but he'll give you money. He is petty and insecure, always picking offence where there is none. His jealousy is out of this world. Me I ran.

      Delete
    12. My dear, I think what is wrong is for the fact that y'all just started.. you are just getting to know each other so there's bound to be ups and downs.. he'll adjust. Don't leave a good man oh, I'm telling you. Work with him on how to overcome his insecurities. Those things he's complaining about, watch out for them, if he constantly wants you to tell him when you are going out, do it.. at some point in time he'll adjust and trust you better. Fear not. All the best to you, -'d congrats in advance!

      Delete
    13. Send him a link to this post so he will know how ppl feel about his behavior

      Delete
    14. Where is Kool blend biko? Please, send me a message

      Delete
    15. The most important recipe for a good relationship after attraction is MUTUAL TRUST.

      If the trust isn't mutual, you are OYO. Pray to God to give u a man that will give you peace.

      And if I may ask you, why d rush ? 3months and already preparing for marriage? If you had taken the 3 months to know him better before commuting to marriage, these traits would be evident to you.

      Talk to urself dear.

      Delete
    16. Omg weed chic I was thinking bout her a few days ago. Kool blend please where are you? Miss you so much please come back.

      Delete
    17. Ann 18:34 U are very right and I love your comment. A man who is insecure and shows it to you is better than a man who will be feeling insecure and you will never know but get U hurt. Work with him on his insecurities and be glad U are doing it to a man who loves you. I Know a man who goes about chasing different woman both young and old, kept his wife at home, care less if she goes out with another man or sleeps around too, what will become of such home at the end. Prove to him that you are not a cheat rather than leaving him

      Delete
  2. Replies
    1. I still can't comprehend the reason why people go celibate few months to their wedding.
      Is either you are a Virgin or onye ikwa iko.
      Iburu onye ikwa iko biko kwara gaba, Iburu Virgin kpachie ukwu gi rue mbochi wedding. (if you have started having sex continue till your wedding, but if you are Virgin remain a Virgin till your wedding night.)
      I'm allergic to this celibate thing.
      Who is deceiving who?
      You are celibate but you are romancing.
      Some will even touch the tip of the dick on top her something, yet they will claim celibate or Virgin.
      That was how I read that a Virgin got pregnant without penetration.
      The fun you no enjoy, still you carry belle.
      I don't want to read it again biko.
      Who celibate Epp?
      Celibate been causing bedmathics problem since 1900

      Delete
    2. I still can't comprehend the reason why people go celibate few months to their wedding.
      Is either you are a Virgin or onye ikwa iko.
      Iburu onye ikwa iko biko kwara gaba, Iburu Virgin kpachie ukwu gi rue mbochi wedding. (if you have started having sex continue till your wedding, but if you are Virgin remain a Virgin till your wedding night.)
      I'm allergic to this celibate thing.
      Who is deceiving who?
      You are celibate but you are romancing.
      Some will even touch the tip of the dick on top her something, yet they will claim celibate or Virgin.
      That was how I read that a Virgin got pregnant without penetration.
      The fun you no enjoy, still you carry belle.
      I don't want to read it again biko.
      Who celibate Epp?
      Celibate been causing bedmathics problem since 1900

      Delete
  3. Poster

    Do not try it. He'll only get worse after marriage.

    And you would send in more chronicles.

    From insecurity, to jealously, to malice to emotional abuse.

    All the signs are there. Forget say na pastor oooh, he's a MAN first and it's only the Holy Spirit that can change him.

    If you go ahead and marry him, please do not send in any chronicles. Carry your cross.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Dear, give yourself a break, go for your studies and come back. Please don't marry an insecure man. He has trust issues. Please don't rush, u may regret it.

      Delete
    2. If you can live with this childish, insecure attitude which will get worse in marriage, then by all means, marry him



      Personally, I can't stand men who don't allow their women breath, going crazy with their own insecurity and choking the life out of their women!


      Na so e dey start o, now he gets "one kind" when you go for interviews, one day, he'll lock you in and tell you you're not allowed to go to work or you'll come in from work or the market and he'll demand he smells your pant for signs of semen before allowing you in



      Then one day, he'll graduate to hitting you.



      If a woman had a life before meeting a man, should that end because she met a man?




      BEFORE MARRIAGE, sit him down and talk to him, ask him to turn the table, if you're acting all insecure, won't he get tired in time? Watch his response and don't fall for that crap about doing it cos he loves you, that's how he'll slap you one day cos he loves you.
      After the talk, watch his for like 3months, the slightest sign of the same rubbish, pls walk away, shows he'll never change.



      Oh, and his family knows he's a mad man walking hence their response, don't expect any support from them, they're all bloody psychopaths looking for who to give them grandchildren, then she's free to leave if she wants to.




      SHARONNA

      Delete
    3. Poster please listen to this advice they always turn out worse. Don't mind his parents, that is not love the Bible has explained what love is and it tells us love is kind and not jealous etc so please don't go on with this wedding rather travel out and face your studies. Single ladies always seek Gods approval from the Bible, if only you will take out time everyday and read the word, there's a lot of knowledge for every situation.

      Delete
    4. It will get worse

      Delete
    5. Exactly what I said

      MrsBee

      Delete
  4. f you can bear the hissing of a snake, don't complane wen you are beaten.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Na wich kind proverb d dis?

      Btw y is ur spelling getting better?

      Delete
    2. Lol..😁😁😁😁

      Delete
    3. #SayNoToCelibacy or be a #VirginManLikeMe.

      Delete
    4. #SayNoToCelibacy or be a #VirginManLikeMe.

      Delete
    5. Gbam! Don't marry him, return everything & start searching because, you VERY single!


      ... Jesus is my worth!

      Delete
    6. I love this 'Villager'sha.You just summed it up for her.

      Delete
  5. Poster can you cope with this behavior in marriage? He will accuse you one day that you are sleeping with your neighbour!
    You know what to do.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I have a feeling this Pastor is a married man. I just do.

      Delete
  6. I see nothing too serious in this.he just in love that's the reason for the insecure behaviour. He will change soon.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. It is very hard for men like that to change.

      Delete
    2. Are you kidding me?
      That's not the normal behaviour of a man in love! He is borderline psychotic. If the man that 'claims ' to love you behaves like this,no one will tell you to run away..

      Delete
    3. This is not love. This is about control and is a recipe for disaster. Imagine a woman was the one doing this. Tomorrow now if something happens to her the same people will say "you didn't see the handwriting on the wall"

      Delete
    4. Poster. Enter go abroad nd fall in love with a better person

      Delete
    5. Whiteberry,pls is not compulsory u must comment.
      What sort of love is that?
      U will end up in a bad marriage if u continue with this ur mentality

      Delete
    6. This is not love. True love breeds trust and that is lacking here. It's only a matter of time before he'll start hitting her.

      Delete
    7. The signs are there girl..I buy Stella's word.. Try and have an heart-to-heart discussion with him..

      Also don't forget that u need God in all ur dealings


      Mc pinky

      Delete
    8. @whiteberry you see nothing serious here? You must have grown up emotionally abused.

      There is EVERYTHING SERIOUS HERE. Poster beware.

      Delete
    9. He is not in love but obsessed

      Delete
    10. Honestly white berry, I see nothing serious her too. Dude is just in love jare. My hubby when he was dating me was like that. He would even go as far as telling me to send pic of where I was whenever I was out. All that changed when I became pregnant with my first child. Can't even remember d last time he bugged me like dat. He has too much time on his hands that's why. When he see beta work on on homefront he will save his energy for more important things like rest, uninterrupted sleep and so on

      Delete
    11. White berry this is no a man in luv, this is a ticking time bomb

      Delete
    12. @Kim kardashian Aka portable queen, you are very stupid for such a nonsense comment towards me on the chronicle post. You are the one already in a bad marriage OK so you don't need to drag others into same shit that you re. You re very very crazy, you are insane, useless thing. Am getting more pissed as am remembering your comment towards me. something must be very wrong with you. That is my point of view on the post, others were making me see reasons and you jumped out from ur already frustrated marriage to type such rubbish. Its very obvious you re one of those always throwing shade at me for just no reason. Have i ever insulted you here, hell no...i always minf my own budiness. Such a strongh word from you no no no. You better trade carefully, am not owning you OK. i don't like DAT ur comment a single bit.

      Delete
  7. Someone who's this insecure when you're together will never support your traveling out to study and if he does, he will never trust you. In fact, it won't even work out




    *Larry was here*

    ReplyDelete
  8. All I see Is TRUST. Hmmmm wahala dey ooooo

    ReplyDelete
  9. No man is perfect!...
    If his good behavior outweigh his bad,marry him!...
    Or do you want him to start hiding his characters now and bring them out when he marries you?...
    That's what men are doing these days anyway...
    Marriage is all about tolerance!...
    Most men are jealous mehn...
    Do you know the rule the next guy you will meet will give you?..
    Nne,be wise!...

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Queen is this you speaking my mind? Nawao! Thank you all the same for this advice... I like it.

      Delete
    2. Who hack ur account?
      Is it bcus 2day is sunday??
      No talk of "Get a side boo"?

      Delete
    3. Queen exactly. In fact my husband did the same thing to me when we were dating, but I over look it that it is love that is doing him. But now am happy, enjoying my home and he has never doubted anything I told him.

      Delete
    4. Queen this yo advise is not complete oo, if he's rich she shud go ahead and marry him though he's an ass.

      Delete
    5. But queen such behaviour quickly translates into name calling, manipulation and even physical violence e.g. Emotional, verbal and physical abuse. Let's teach women to love themselves more and demand more from relationships. I believe that his behaviour has gotten this far because YOU let him. I guess that you didn't know better. It happened to me. I used to walk on eggshells, he had access to all my passwords and used to monitor me. If I go out and come back he'll ask me if men were looking at me. If I say yes he'll blame my dressing. He now used to get angry if I wear a top that doesn't cover my whole bum and he Literally banned me from wearing leggings and body con skirt. At a point he would imagine me cheating on him in his dream. He would be uneasy if I even spoke to my male cousins or I had to visit my family for any reason. He wouldn't be happy if I spoke to anyone or went anywhere, I should just stay at home and chat with him. This is not love, this is a game of possession and an Insecure man will NEVER win so he will keep repressing and punishing you, no matter what you do to please him. Such men target younger girls, shy or reserved women that they feel they can bully No woman has to take abuse of any sort, including cheating. No CHILD of GOD has to tolerate such behaviour. I had to leave, because I became an anxious shadow of my old self and realised that he had made himself the only friend i had in the world and would punish me if i spoke to anyone by ignoring me and screaming at me, using swear words at me. Even after I ended it he obsesses over if I'm seeing someone. The funny thing is that I'm single and I have no such interest for now.

      Delete
    6. He is jealous cos Una Neva gbensh..always negative abt your way about.He thinks you may be getting it somewhere else.I hope he changes when you get married.

      Delete
    7. Queen is that you or someone commented with ur id,Stella someone is impersonating queen bcos queen I know have never made sense and she just did 2day.

      Delete
    8. Dietitian gbensing will make it worse.

      Delete
    9. Queen could be right. But seriously I don't see why you should settle for this. This could get worse or not. Why take the chance? Was it not on this blog I read a story of a pastor who murdered his estranged wife on the pretext of a reconciliation? Is he your only suitor? Even if he is na by force? Your mind dey already tell you nau.

      Delete
    10. I will suggest u take Queen's advice cuz u don't know d rules of d next man u will meet

      Delete
    11. Anon 15:21 God bless you. It's what it is, early signs of possible emotional abuse that will grow wings into all shades of wrong.
      Don't say you thought he'd change, they rarely do!!

      MrsBee

      Delete
  10. Replies
    1. Stella you heading get as he be, pastors are human

      Poster, if he continues like your marriage will be so troublesome. So, dear give him some space and see what happen after. Plus you can't marry this kind of a man and travel abroad

      Delete
  11. It's a waah

    The fact that he's a pastor doesn't mean he shouldn't be jealous na....he's still human after all lol

    Dear poster, your man is a very insecure being and who knows the kinda things he's capable of doing cos of it? Insecure men tend to be violent to their partners oooh
    ,
    Since you say he is a good man...It's left for you to know if you can overlook his insecurities and marry him. Or take a walk now

    ReplyDelete
  12. I think you need to chill and postpone the wedding,go for your studies first and really pray bout him and marriage itself. Truly this are traits that can lead to abuse later on,we have read many of such stories here. God wil guide you in making the right decision (amen)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I know a man that checks his wife's virgina for sexual fluid when she comes back from work everyday, my dear run for your life. This isn't love

      Delete
    2. Thank you. Poster read ooo

      Delete
  13. I think you should court longer please.
    Whatever you do,don't put your dreams on hold.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Seconded! Poster take note πŸ“

      Delete
    2. Some guys get mind sha. Me, marry girl wey I never fuck? Na lie o. What if she sucks in bed? Some people are not just into love making no matter how hard and long you teach them. I don't have that patience and I don't wanna cheat. I must taste the shokonyonyo before I even propose o.

      Delete
    3. So 17:45 when you don chop πŸͺ πŸͺ πŸͺ cookies finish and you don't like the taste you go just dump the person. Smh, God is watching you.

      Delete
    4. Anony 17:45 some ladies are good in bed before marriage, but after the big day, access to that place will be highly limited. So young 'un, marry for love so you can endure whatever marriage throws at you.

      Delete
  14. Nna eh, which kain man they jealous like this? Me i cannot marry such a man o. If ur distant relation call or visit after marriage, na war. If u too call ur papa or mama, he becomes jealous. If u go market and u nor quick come back, u're in soup. He is not only insecure, he also has trust issues. Any man dat doesn't trust u before marriage, wouldn't trust u oafter marriage either. Follow Stella's advice and thread with caution.

    ReplyDelete
  15. Insecurity puts strains on a union, leading to depression before killing it, whatever u notice in ur partner while dating/courting, don't think a marriage certificate will make the situation better, in most cases it gets worse cus ure bound to him & obliged to answer any yeye question he throws ur way, well, u can respond "Ask google" & see how well that plays out... I wonder why he's already this jealous, is he punishing u for his Ex crimes? Or he's jst wired not to trust women? Watever the fuck his reasons maybe, let him know he'd kill this celibate union in its crib.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Atheist new buddy27 November 2016 at 20:18

      I kinda like the way u think Atheist. Howdy

      Delete
  16. Some men are overly jealous beings&from my personal experience when U have a quarrel they like to gain points by saying hurtful&demeaning words. Having a heart to heart talk might change his orientation or it just might not. Cos when U do things he might just start to find faults and cuss&accuse U all over again. Love makes people act stupid&do stupid things. Re-evaluate your relationship cos it is for better for worse&know if U can deal with it or not. Don't go in with the mindset that U will pray&he will change..well the Lord works in mysterious ways...but use your brain. Dunno if this is an advice or not but U will be fine. Just think it through...ProudlyDeltan

    ReplyDelete
  17. This "marriage" started without proper courtship. It was like the owner priced the "goat" from afar; over the phone. Even Jesus had three years of tutoring his apostle and disciples and they all getting to know one another before he paid for them with his blood on the cross. That one is a pastor does not mean that his character is flawless; every christian disciplines the flesh through fasting like Jesus taught at least twice a week to be able to "kill" the works of the flesh some of which are selfishness, pride, lust, greed etc. Are you and this man living like Jesus taught in disciplining the flesh; if not, how do you think that disobeying the manufacturer's manual instructions will help you. Even the Pharisees obeyed this if you check Luke eighteen.

    Well, you've got to start communicating and do not be proud to keep away from doing so; it is pure ego, "he must apologize" kind of it. Begin to learn the scriptures and fast and pray together. And decide which is more important; "studying abroad" or building you home!

    ReplyDelete
  18. He really needs to work on his insecurities, he will only get worse. If he doesn't deal with it, u will b back with a bigger chronicle after marriage. I dislike a jealous man,it's very irritating.

    ReplyDelete
  19. He has not done anything wrong he is just overly jealous nd he hasnt trusted u enough mayb he has trust issues, sit down wit him nd explain dis situation, giving him two options, to either see change in him or ur calling d wedding off, one thing ive learnt bout this type of people is dat wen dis issue of trust is settled, ur good to go, they wont even blive if there close relation said dey say u doin sometinelse nd u too,try to avoid situations dat will lead to this,

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Will you allow your son to date someone like that? You people think abuse is only by beating

      Delete
  20. Perhaps both of you should postpone the wedding date & get to know each other.Relationships are about trust,if you or your fiancΓ© has to play detective,then it's time to move on.

    ReplyDelete
  21. My dear poster run 4 ur life, some 1 u want to marry and spend the rest of ur life wit, does nt trust u, at all u,. Hmm dat is a sandy foundation if ever u decied to build. Did he catch u wit a guy? Dat only wen u start earning his trust again. If na unsecure guy run, b4 he go use rod 4 ur leg then Stella will post it here, lol.

    ReplyDelete
  22. Pls, go for ur masters first b4 marriage, cos he may nt allow u go. If he does, be ready for drama.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Exactly, he might be agreeing to your travelling abroad now, but believe me once you guys walk down the aisle, he will resist your going and even try to brain wash abi confuse you on why you shouldn't travel again.
      Please check yourself well well before committing to the marriage.
      You're in a better place now to make an informed decision.
      Prays for wisdom as you make up your mind.

      Delete
  23. My dear u will suffer if you marry that guy u will never be happy all you described above is my life and am paying for it daily. I advised not to marry him nd I thought it was something I cld handle nd that with time he wld change for wia. My dear it only gets worse

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Pls tell her,am talking from experience!! It won't work

      Delete
    2. I hope this poster has the courage to listen and act accordingly.

      Delete
  24. Poster I think he loves u but just been scared, are u sure he is in support of ur travelling out to study hmmm I don't think so, anywayz pls make a wise decision

    ReplyDelete
  25. Dear poster, your man is very insecure. Someone who never trust you and accuses you of everything when you are with him can never trust you when you go outside the country and people like this tend to be very violent, this behaviour of this will escalate to a violent behaviour later on.
    Will this behavior of his stop after marriage? My sister, people make marriage and marriage does not make people, anything he does now will continue till marriage and get worse after, am not married but am a living witness of this kind of behaviour.
    If you both are already quarreling over irrelvalent issues when you haven't gotten married, use your 6th sense to imagine how after marriage would be.
    Someone said above "if his goods are more than his bads, then marry him" my sister, that is a no go area. Character do not change if conscious steps are not taken to change them.
    This one you are already getting mad at him for this behavior, when you get married, I tell you, you will be scared at every step you take.
    He will soon tell you to start telling him whenever you want to drink water.

    ReplyDelete
  26. why is he so insecure? does he have a skeleton in his cupboard? well, maybe. you try sha. me I can't deal o. even if he is a pastor. may be you should give the relationship a little more time since you met him three months ago. there are a lot of things you still need to know about him.

    ReplyDelete
  27. I don't think you are telling us the truth. It's only your side we heard and ofcos you sugar coated it to suite yourself.
    You don't work and whose gonna finance your study?
    He's investing on you and you don't pick up your phone when you know he would be calling.
    Just shows you wanna be called a Mrs cos you don't love this guy you just like the fact that he's a pastor and wouldn't get to know about your wide pussy etc till he is in it.

    ReplyDelete
  28. Don't rush into getting married to him. Get to know each other more. Let him know your concerns. His lack of trust for you is an expression of his inner fears. That constant state of suspicion is unhealthy and could be very dangerous. You're smart not to have ignored these signs. Be ready to walk away if he continues with this behaviour.

    ReplyDelete
  29. This Bros you described up there is a bad news if you are saying the truth about him.
    Forget about him been a pastor, he's a human being and don't expect him to change is behavioral atitude when you guys finally married.

    ReplyDelete
  30. Lady T/ am worth more than a thousand dollars27 November 2016 at 15:44

    Run for your life. It will not get better but worse. Or rather go for your masters first. Get a job. Then talk about marriage. This guy won't change.

    ReplyDelete
  31. Poster, your husband to be will never change after marriage. Come and ask me...

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Ask you are you google hahahahaha, bvs will not kee me

      Delete
  32. Don't enter one chance like me o.

    That was how my now husband told me he has changed, because I broke up with him due to similar behavior like your man's own while dating.
    Now we are married and the accusations are piling up even when I don't go anywhere, not even to the market.

    It's either he accuses me that I am talking to my boyfriends while carrying his baby, or some other ridiculous accusations.
    What has he not said?
    I even moved to another room and told him to live his life while I live mine, and he will still go to the window of the room and be peeping to see what I'm doing...

    There was even a day he made the statement that he thought he had gotten a wife, not knowing he was harbouring a prostitute. I sharply responded that his mother is the prostitute. E pain am wella as the woman just die then.

    Another day he said he will take the baby for DNA and which I responded that DNA is 150k,if he doesn't do it, he is a bastard.

    I used to be quiet but he has turned me to an abusive woman. Because I never wronged him in any way, I married him as a virgin and the baby looks so much like him.

    He made me lose my job and he's making me lose my sanity.
    Now he has gone for an occasion, other responsible men are back home, I've not seen him. Then when he comes, he starts another ridiculous accusation.

    Did I tell you I discovered his sex tape?

    I have tried to ask my people to talk to him, they are dragging leg because they don't want to interfere. Toh, the day I leave him, no one should interfere....

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Babes you are still there? You are trying ooo.

      Delete
  33. Poster, all you narrated here are the sighs you shouldn't ignore at all. He won't change after marriage but get worse. Don't think cos he's a pastor, he won't hit you. He will with time if he can't trust you.

    Think about it, you're not married to him yet and he's like this, what will happen when you're finally with him? I will advice you not to marry him. This is the same advice i'll give anyone I know.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Don't think that his being a pastor exempts him from weaknesses. In fact things are sometimes worse with men of the cloth who should know better (go figure...one of Satan's ways of destroying the church). I was shocked when I learnt BB Winans abused his wife. So babes the fact you sent this chronicle shows your concern. Pray about it and let the peace of God be an umpire in your life.

      Delete
  34. If u r traveling out to study plz do not get married yet maka Akuko.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Sombody does not trust you in his Shokoto, what makes you think he will trust you in Sokoto? My dear tell him you need sometime to think.

      Delete
  35. My dear, run and don't look back, he's only going to get worse. Don't wait till he starts to embarrass you in public and calling you names.Being overly jealous shouldn't be seen as normal.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Like what teeblis did lolz

      Delete
  36. My Dear poster please do not marry that man you will hate your self for not listening what you described above is my situation. That is not love if a man loves you he should be able to truth you trust is a basic necessity in love. My dear see me ive being crying since I came back from church I miss my home where I came from before I got married that is not a good thing. My Dear u will loose ur self in that marriage he will chase your friends away both male and female even ur own family that is the power of insecurity. Even ur church members office colleagues both male and female he will chase all of them away. Ur husband is insecure and marriage is for the strong heartening nd foe men his jealousy is not a sign of love but a sign that your man is a boy. My dear if u come back from work everyday prepare to quarrel he will constantly check your phones, mails and social networks if u no gree u will get beating. My dear even ur family can't have peace if they come see u he will always want to know the content of the discussions you have with your friends. Can u even work my dear the Lord is showing you the signs now I dint date for long and thought he'd change when we got married knowing I was now his 4 wia. My dear u will regret marrying that guy everyday u will be explaining your every activities like a kid to a man that is just your husband if I had known I will never have married this man men! Sweetheart you don't know the value of your freedom now till u loose it. He will turn u into a quarell some person because u r always tired of declaring ur innocence. If u greet neighbours men wahala. If u talk to megard trouble, genrtator repair man nkor. My dear no no no I said don't marry that guy u will change in one year no1 will recognise u again. Your family u no go fit call the way u like. You will pay 4 his own insecurity defect with your whole life nd happiness. Run run run.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Are u innocent? If you regretting Ur actions, will U tell anyone? No @ poster fix your relationship if there is any chance.some people here are busy sleeping around after they left their home and they just wish they had the opportunity to fix their home instead of leaving. God will re-arrange your relationship just pray , the devil will always want to destroy a treasure when he sees the future from afar.

      Delete
    2. Pls you people shld count the no of 'My dear'in this comment. Waiting for the result. Stella post my comment o.

      Delete
  37. Stella even with heart to heart,this kind of man will pretend to change for a while.if I were u I won't take him serious,as shy and reserved as I is no man will try that shit with me,its called #SelfEsteem if not madam you will experience more from him.i wonder why the family is supporting such insecure act.

    ReplyDelete
  38. You will end up a bitter wife,his type won't change.

    ReplyDelete
  39. Chysugar... so you had to delete your comment on the testimony post, you lying bitch, you don forget say ur neigbours full this blog, same way u r single and claiming married on this blog. Millionaire ko, millionaire ni....

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Why waste energy on someone who can't do simple math. calculation? πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚ Mscheew Orisirisi.

      Delete
  40. Trust is vital in a relationship or marriage. U might want to ask urself few questions and if within u , there is a deep conviction to go ahead with him despite his jealous disposition towards his "unclaimed property"and also bear in mind that men like this are prone to violence. Just be careful.

    ReplyDelete
  41. Poster, you sounds like a very good and reserved girl!
    Please, think twice before you make this big move and take the bold steps, your boyfriend is very insecure and I don't think it will stop even after getting married to him.

    And I don't believe he will allow you go for your studies abroad. So, you better be well prepared for the storm ahead, because you're going into a battle field; except if you want to give it a second thought and tell him to give you time, and that you're having a cold feet.
    I see an aggressive man (pastor), you will tamed you and not allow you have your freedom of movements, and it usually don't end well.

    So many reasons I don't like those men on suit who call themselves pastor, they can be very authoritative and they act like dictator most times.

    ReplyDelete
  42. Nawa oo this life. I'm here complaining that my boo trusts me too much no matter how much I try to make him jealous. He trusts me 1000% lol Life is a mystery

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Abi o my sister, human wants are insatiable. That's why we all need each other because we are all different people with different thinking

      Delete
  43. #Sometimes when things are falling apart they may actually be falling into place*

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Not in this case..lol

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    2. ✔correct!

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  44. Poster, that's how it starts. Soon he'll start beating u coz he'll be obsessed with u

    ReplyDelete
  45. My Dear sis, don't ever try it. Jealousy trait doesn't get better with time,it gets worse. I am a living example, I opted out of the relationship and didn't even consider looking back not even for a seconds. Like Stella, said it is DEAD ON ARRIVAL. Walk out,work on yourself and love will find you.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Don't worry U will soon look back to see what u've lost. Go and fix your relationship/marriage

      Delete
  46. It's high level of testosterone. He'll calm down after eating the cookie. Since he's the kind of man you want, affirm your love and devotion as often as you can till he gets it.
    Say something like "babe, my body is first of all God's then yours. As long as I live, I'll be faithful to God and you. I need you to help me by trusting me. If you call me and I can't pick, be rest assured I'll call you as soon as I can. Even if you see me with a man, pls trust that you're on my mind, and if you are,there's more space for any other. I love you"
    Men! Aren't they all big babies?!
    Or you can take a walk. Your choice dear.

    ReplyDelete
  47. My dear dnt try it , am speaking from experience. Hmmmm! I had an ex like that, from him not trusting u even when u ve never given any reason for him not to , to been controlling. I was living a life a fear, when he calls and he hears d sound of a car via phone am in trouble. Even if I needed to go get something around the corner I ve to call first. We both went to the bank one day and someone asked a question, hmmmm!! That was how he got upset, dragged me and stormed out of the bank
    Mind u he was very cute, Rich with swag but he lacks trust, he gives me everything but trust me I walked away
    The last straw was wen he took me to meet his dad as per introduction, he rushed out for work and came back. Met me and his dad talking in their house, sis , mother was around. I waa leaving and his dad asked for my no n I gave him that was it. He took me home, called me all sorts of name, that I was enticing his father. My dear all hell broke loose, I gave him the insult of his life that he would never forget. And I came back to life, so my dear dnt u dare try it oh cos it ain't stopping anytime soon. Am not even sure u can work while married to such a man cos won't u ve male colleagues??
    Am happily married now to the most amazing man now oh so dnt worry Ur pretty head

    ReplyDelete
  48. That's not love, and things will get worse in marriage. End things while you t.

    ReplyDelete
  49. Poster, point blank or rather bitter truth, your man will get worse when he marries you. Any relationship that lack trust, will lack love. Also this can even lead him to hit you one day. He is very insecure and still hurting from stories he hears from people he counsels or from his past experience. Watch well o. Goodluck

    ReplyDelete
  50. Poster stop the marriage arrangements and tell him your reasons. Tell him you are leaving for study and if he handles it well you might reconsider. You don't want to know what hell awaits marrying a man who will question and rage war with every of your moves!! If you go ahead and marry him please don't send your chronicles here.

    MrsBee

    ReplyDelete
  51. I advise you leave the man cos he'll always be intimidated by your success. Secondly, don't fall for that "i'll change" attitude cos the truth is PEOPLE DON'T REALLY CHANGE,THEY ONLY CHANGE THEIR TACTICS. Guys can promise you heaven and earth just for you to marry them, after the wedding they will go back to their character. Be wise.

    ReplyDelete
  52. Queen haff finally repented fa! Praise the Lord people.

    ReplyDelete
  53. Hmmm...am afraid this ur pastor husband to be wil change after marriage. .. his jealous is not normal.
    He didn't even trust u...look before u leap...

    Marriage no be beans...

    ReplyDelete
  54. Poster believe me,with this behaviour after marriage no abroad trip for.Asikwana na mu agwaghi gi o.Napu ya oso biko

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Poster can't u see that d marriage won't work?d Bible says in Amos 3:3 can two walk together unless they agree?marriage is forever nd from what u said,both of u are not compatible.it won't work unless u want to try ur luck bt don't gamble wit ur life

      Delete
  55. The stories I read everyday about relationships are heartbreaking and frightening......sometimes I'm left in tears......humans being unkind and inconsiderate towards the feeling of their fellow humans.
    Dear Jesus please fix this. It is well

    ReplyDelete
  56. Men self ooooo.....later he'll be preaching abt jealousy in church

    ReplyDelete
  57. Men self ooooo.....later he'll be preaching abt jealousy in church

    ReplyDelete
  58. Men sef ooooo....later he'll be teaching d opposite in church

    ReplyDelete
  59. Poster please put the marriage preparation on hold for now till you both iron out this issue first, you must see changes in him before you agree for the marriage to take place. I was expecting him to have trust for you since you both has not enter the place, you too need to amend your ways or check your life style, it could be that you have some attitude that he sees in you and feel you are cheating. There is no smoke without a fire.

    ReplyDelete
  60. Someone like this is not only insecured but a cheat himself. I'm talking from experience. Poster run for your life because they get worse by the day.

    ReplyDelete
  61. You better don't lose a good man.

    Any sane man would be jealous especially one that is not getting it fromay multiple source.

    So use ur brain and stay before u enter a player's hand who has 8 girlfriends and u will think he is secure even if he does not care where u are most times.

    ReplyDelete
  62. Poster he will not change after marriage. What ever you are experiencing now is '''test running''' lol. When he pays your dowry he will be fully incharge of your existence.

    Life is worth living

    ReplyDelete
  63. pls leave the marriage for now and go abroad to finish ur studies. don't get urself tied down by this marriage because it is gonna end in tragedy. he would become worst after you get married an move abroad, his insecurity would only get worse, you are within the same town and he is acting this way; imagine what would happen when you are both in different continent. He probably would not let you leave after the marriage. choose your battle wisely my dear.

    ReplyDelete

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