Stella Dimoko Korkus.com: Saturday In House Gists -JOB 'HAUNT' Stories

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Saturday, 12 August 2017

Saturday In House Gists -JOB 'HAUNT' Stories

Every one should have job hunt stories that still haunts them till date....Do you?Is it funny,scary,Inspirational or just plain flat?




One Job Hunt experience that still haunts me till date was when i got introduced to someone who boasted he could get me a job...

After so much talk i was asked to come to an office that was supposed to be an Interview,after the interview around 9am,I was asked to wait...I waited until 6pm on that spot and just when i decided to go and get something to eat because i was too hungry,i returned to see the Boss i was asked to wait for had gone......I never went back there.


And Then i went for another interview for an oil firm and was so sure I would get it...We were asked to step into a room of ten people where assessment was going on...I stepped in and saw someone i didnt expect to see and the shock was too much.......Heehehehehhehe I RAN.

Infact all my job search had conditions oh...gbensh and get the job or forget it and i had this notion that i was too intelligent and i would bargain for the job first and cookie after six months...no one agreed.
hehehehehhe

I would love to also read about guys job hunt that haunts them..I mean,what could it possibly be?

Oya gist !!!


62 comments:

Miss Ess said...

Let the comments in

Blackberry said...

No experience, never had an interview sef! Lol.

Again, not all companies ask for bearded meat o! Na wen u don enter, one country manager can adopt u as a desk warmer, lol

sexy Daddy said...

When I finished my NYSC,naso I began my job hunt.First of all I went to one multinational oil company in pH.Summited my CV,naso gate man collected our numbers and turned us to ATM!😀😀😀😀.Pay or forget about the job!I paid soteyyyy one day I borrowed my self brain and walked away.Lol
Nigeria I hail thee!!

Lady C said...

Kai!!!!can't forget my first interview at an outsourcing company in VI,"I was asked how do you calm down angry customer"and my responds was I will give him/her a cup of tea or coffee to calm their nerves,the look the interviewer gave me l already know I will be disqualify.


I am still a loafer ooo,pls bv's help with job even if it is an intership job.

Theyvid Adebayo said...

I remember when my Aunt was going for an interview some years back,She was robbed off her belongings on her way to the company.She had to borrow someone's phone to Call us what has happened.Movies to watch this weekend-Atomic Blonde,Austin Found,Kidnap,Girls Trip,Death Race,Message from the King ,Get the Girl,and this old movie Lion King.Have a good weekend.

Beloved said...

You Ran !!! Hahahaha ...i wonder who he/she could be 😂😂😂

Anonymous said...

I helped a girl get a job in my company, that was like 5yrs ago, i dint do it in return of anythg, just out of the goodness of my heart, she ws excited and blessed me with good fuck after receiving her appointment letter, it ws good sex and so i wanted more, i tried and she made it known that it was gratitude sex, no wahala na, i respect myself face front.
Later she started forming attitide for me, doing like small madam, even reporting to the management wats meant to be curbed, listing names of workers defaulting and all that, including my name... wen i confronted her she said "am sorry u got affected but i was doin my job" i say ok oh... na their me and 2 other guys set her up clean, she got fired.

Chikito The Professional Fire for Fire a.k.a 'Anike' 😂😂😂😂😂 said...

😂😂😂😂😂 Jeez! Bearded meat and desk warmer

Chikito The Professional Fire for Fire a.k.a 'Anike' 😂😂😂😂😂 said...

*seats down*
So.... while I was writing my final year project, I went to sell hair to one man who wanted to buy for his wife. They were at NAF club calabar. That's how when i reached there the man wants to change mind. Ah! I convinced and marketed oooh until he got the hair. His friend that was eating fish with him told me he liels my persistence, gave me his card to call him when i get to Lagos that he will give me a job. I thought he was lying infact even my parent thought same. Until i finished my project, came to lagos. Called and called, the man was out of the country and resorted to mails. He told me to go and get my leter after Christmas break. Finally i went and collected my letter (4th of Jan 2011 - won't forget). 80k and I hadn't even served, no interview nothing. Waaawu!! As a fresh grad i entered the company with an attitude, afterall I was sitting in metigns with some high and mighties. Knacking my hair (i was selling) and heels, snobbing almost everyone, at a point sef i enter without greeting anyone except the bosses and my immediate colleagues - 3 guys. Hehehe.... november the next year NYSC came calling. My boss tried to fix me in Lagos with every connection he had. Story. They sent me to ondo. He promised to redeploy me that I should do 3 months. But no one wanted me there, they stood against it ehn. They now brought someoen and kicked me out. Meanwhile I applied for redeploy me and finally got. When I got to Lagos, all I met were 'sorries' my job had been given to soemone else. Office politics 😂😂😂 then i started knowing what it meant to job hunt

Onokala Amarachi said...

When I have seriously job hunting, I was submitting my CV any any organization n company that I see vacancy without regard for qualifications. I saw this vacancy online about an account which is proficient in Excel and I modified my cv to say that I am proficient in it hoping to learn on the job (my mistake), I was called for interview (oral) which I did very well then their HR brought laptop and a receipt like paper and told me to re-do the receipt or something like that, after over 2hours, he came to check on me and I politely told him I can't do it, I didn't wait for the outcome I just jejely carried my bag n left. Excel bawo

BLOGBRITY said...

I was bounced back at the gate because I knew no one even a receptionist. I went home in tears. Dad could only console me. 3weeks later I went for an interview and got my first job.

I once gate crashed at UBA. And s pin was generated for me to do the aptitude test, but my fear for quantitative made me pleas with the HR guys to reschedule. And they did!

BLOGBRITY said...

😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

Anonymous said...

Had to sleep with my VC fr him to gv me a job...wasn't happy but wetin man go do???

Stella Igbokei said...

The one that haunt me is PWC aptitude text/screening i got there one hr late coz I had to attend another company screening too

umpire said...

Dear Stella, My most miserable Job hunt was your fault. A while ago, you posted an advert of a reputable Oil firm in Abuja, looking to employ someone 30yrs and must be married, lives in Abuja to work as a cashier. Me believing I qualify, I went to the oil firm, it was a filling station along Abuja outskirts. When they saw my packaging with my rickety car, the first question was, they don't think I would take the job. I asked them why would they conclude, I'm over 30 and married. The lady then informed me that the pay was little. Me believing that I would manage 70k for a start, since they asked for married man, who has responsibility and liability and will not run with their money. I asked, Madam please how much do yo pay and after fumbling, she said 30K, I asked her if it was $ and she laughed. I declined the Job and asked her not to post such requirements with such a Pay on SDK blog. I later told them that it was a security risk for a cashier who will handle millions for them to be paid 30k. It is such nonsense that encourages theft and kidnapp cases amongst employees and later they will blame someone they helped. Rubbish. Aunty Stella observe.

Anonymous said...

One man told me to sleep with him so that could help me get a job in a federal university

Chikito The Professional Fire for Fire a.k.a 'Anike' 😂😂😂😂😂 said...

I now thought i wanted to be an MUA. Did house of Tara diploma, got my box etc in the interim and tried that until my NYSC finished - at least it got me my first car lol. Then my mentor told me to stop that 'laziness' and go and find work.
Chai! I remember going for one interview and the woman was so intimidating that I went to seat in the car to cry. She told me I will never amount to anything. On top wetin na? Another interview they kept me and two of my friends there from 9am until 4pm before they attended to us - we still didnt get the job. Another one was one of those text message jobs only to go there and they were advertising health products, telling us to come register. Imagine. Another one the interviewers started quarreling and one held the other on the shirt. Ah! I excused myself. Therr was one one of the inerviewers told me she cant give me the job but she's getting married on so and so i should come and do her makeup. Anotger one i passed first two stages, I had left they call me that the CEO wants to meet me as final stage (oil servicing company). Told them I was in ym way home, they said please let just finalsie it today. I turned back and went. Got there the man saw my first degree and asked me what kind of a joke of a course is that? (Agric) I told him if he thinks so then I shouldnt even be interviewing to work for him. He said: fine interview over and you won't be getting this job. Told him: okay. I will go to where I'm valued. Thanks. Picked up my bag and walked out. I was pissed cos i had to cancel a makeup job for that. I still did my makeup hustle on side sha all this while.

The next job i got was at a company ont the mainland. 55k. Chai! I now started regretting leaving my first job. I said I if i had known i would have behaved myself and I wont be in this mess. But i took the job as penance. Lol Interview was so easy and i was contract staff. Then I got another one on the mainland too but not as far in as the first one. The interview was funny the HR woman told me shes not giving me the job that she's sorry. But my direct boss (a lady) just told her- it's okay. I can work with her let her come to my department. It was really nice working under that lady. Guess how much? 80k! Same 80k I was taking for granted. This time i behaved myself and even made friends with that HR woman while on the job 😂 I gained lots of experience ehn and then i ported. They still owe me 2 months salary till now but make them carry go. The rest is history.

Chikito The Professional Fire for Fire a.k.a 'Anike' 😂😂😂😂😂 said...

*ignore typos* can't correct all biko

Chikito The Professional Fire for Fire a.k.a 'Anike' 😂😂😂😂😂 said...

November the same year (I meant)

Chikito The Professional Fire for Fire a.k.a 'Anike' 😂😂😂😂😂 said...

Chai! Sorry I've done the I test too

Anonymous said...

OMG my job stories should be in series. Where will I start, First bank. I wrote First bank test in 09 very difficult and passed don't ask me how. I was invited for interview with 4 man panel. Been that is Nigeria na, I tried and also told my long distance uncle that stays in the aboard since he's well connected. That was how this man introduced me the one of the board of directors that's his friend and I started calling him. He kept assuring me but I was the one updating him on the latest been that I was a member of nairaland I we communicate with people that were later call for training. Mr board of director was actually not doing anything but was assuring maybe to have a taste of p*ssy. I was young and very wise; not desperate but really wanted a bank job. So, one day, I was at home when my long distant uncle called me that he will want to meet Mr member of board of director in his site as he came to our city and will quickly leave. I jumped bike and reached. As we were all climbing his site, this MBOD tickled my waist. I knew right there that I wouldn't get the job. He started saying that they will have 2nd badge meanwhile, people in the training said they wouldn't be such. If I was desperate and wasn't keeping tab wouldn't been deceived. Ok this my Uncle wanted to sleep with me but doesn't know how to tell me. Na long distance uncle ohh. He's well connected and I have met one of the top presidential aid through. Just introduction. Then, I went with my parents to ask him for govt job. We met the presidential aid at his house. Through the PA, her sisters and several other people have gotten GJ. He assured me that I need not mention it to PA that he will work toward it. That was how whenever I call him, he will start telling that he doesn't have time to discuss what will not yield profit with PA. My husband, (boyfriend then) told me that the uncle wants to sleep with me but wanted me to figure it out. It happens that whenever he comes back from the abroad, he will call me and tell me that he need an assistant that he will be paying me. Thought is a good idea. Decided to follow him to understand what the job is all about. The job is all about meeting his account officer and business partner with him talking nonsense. Told him I no fit do that kind job. Job without description; doing absolutely bull crap. Meanwhile, I wrote para military test he said he wanted Navy for me. Uncle, na para military dey take na this man refused. He kept turning and tossing me. Every time, he will call me and ask me if I can manage a laundry shop let him open a big one. Told him blatantly that I can't. He said I should exercise patience that he bringing expatriate for a big company till today nothing. What did the bible said about trusting on a man again. I was really disappointed. I started managing my 40k job. Till when I list expected, God used someone to bless me with a good job. Someone that I rarely call but my mum often call him. I prayed more rather than putting my trust in a man, I will rather pray.

Bubul said...

A friend of mine link me about a Secretary Job . Na so I resume oo. Started working . One's it was month end,the stupid boss told me to come meet him at sharaton hotel to get my salary . He even gave me a room number. My salary was just 35 k. I went home n never resume the next day . He called n said I a fool n that in Abuja I won't get a job like his . He also said my vagina is not made of diamond. I carry my cross till God located me . Up till today I work that month for free . I was never paid bc I refuse to sleep with him .

Housed-On-Water said...

You can say the circumstances surrounding their needed qualification and hype is bad but not the pay. I tell an N.D holder that studied accounting, living with his parents so have things sorted for him or her without liability will do it.

Cherry topaz said...

Lol 😄😄 what a funny experience. I was really entertained 😄

Housed-On-Water said...

Jobs dey Lagos oh. Indeed our environment can affect our choices. See me reading about oil companies and oil servicing jobs including multinational companies all in Lagos and Abuja. But here in Benin na only school work dey. Teachers everywhere.

Anonymous said...

That's bad tho....😁😀😀😀

Anonymous said...

Humility has a long way to go.....😀😀😀

Esther Mgbolu said...

Good for her,onos

Anwuli Uzu said...

Lol,I cam relate with those marketing drug ish,very common in lagos.please how do I contact you,I need advice on career path, I have B.Agric but I want to tow the customer service/human resource field.Thank you

Esther Mgbolu said...

Hahahahahahahahahahahaha

DeoFavente.. said...

I've gone for an interview that got me waiting from 7:30am to 10pm in Abuja, this was the last stage,i got the job and was offered 80k,i was so happy and it was a cool job, but after just one month, my boss said he wants "bearded meat",come to the hotel blah blah, i will buy you a car,spoil you... I am married sir! He said "no big deal, everybody does it here, i won't distract you from work,i will only need you maybe once or twice a month" Kai! I was seething,and just left the job, i cant "coman" become a sex slave to my father's age mate because of money,when my husband is still alive and i have kids to bring up. I am still jobless and looking for.
If you're in Abuja and have links please help me, i am professional, hard working, friendly, neat,smart and efficient.

DeoFavente.. said...

I went for another interview for PA position to a certain "madam",after doing the "come today, come back tomorrow , please i have to reschedule come back next week" we finally got a chance to talk and she said she wants me to always be on black suits, resume be 9am and close whenever she is done, could be 9pm or even later, and i could be called in even on Sundays if need be... I was just spinning all this in my head when i heard your salary for starters is 30k then after 6months we would increase to 35k. Jesus!!! This doesn't even cover my transportation! I just "jejely",went home feeling all shades of wacky.

Ada Aguiyi said...

My story plenty. Ranging from the ones that will stylishly collect your number and be calling you like Airtel to the ones that will be feeling like gods and want your body before they even allow you to see "The Oga".Hmmmm... story plenty ooo! I just leave everything in God's hand.

Anonymous said...

Mine wasn't even an interview. After service I was always going to the office I did my service but every time no vacancy. One day I went and I met 2 people we served togwther already working there. That day I went home crying. It is well with this country.

DON™ said...

Nice one

Chikito The Professional Fire for Fire a.k.a 'Anike' 😂😂😂😂😂 said...

@Anwuli get HR qualifications fast. That's what I did when i kinda tilted to HR. That qualification helps alot. For customer service chai... I don't know oh. But there's this short course I did for customer solutions service provider, during my NYSC year. The exams were easy. Please google it. Cheers

Chikito The Professional Fire for Fire a.k.a 'Anike' 😂😂😂😂😂 said...

Good! 🖒

Omeh said...

Lmao.that's d mistake most of us make. After editing ur CV to suit an application, we forget to actually quickly learn those things.an eye opener for me

Anonymous said...

Hmm stellz. My friend told me about the place she started working that i should apply. Na so i apply. I got there and we did interview and i got the job.
Later on, the people that got the job before me told me there were about 100 that came for interview, time for interview came and the owner's wife came out. she pointed at one girl "what kind of make up is this? Leave,she turned to another one "you even fixed lashes, leave.that was how she chased about 50 ladies.
That she didn't want them to come and snatched her husband.
That ended up being the worst job of my life. On top 50k, I was employed as an IT personnel but we go for marketing, we clean the office, baby sit. Sometime they leave their baby with us at work till 8pm. Time to pay salary nko, they will not come to office for 2 weeks bcuz they don't want to pay.
Nov December they refused to pay. When we resumed in January they told us to just forget Nov and Dec salary and start from Jan again. And that no more salary just commission, you sell a house you get paid and one house goes for 90m. In this economy, inside this lagos. Omo all 15 of us resigned that day. Up till now they didn't employ anybody again. Husband and wife have been doing the job themselves. The story long I just don tire to type

Anonymous said...

Choi. I don't even know whether to laugh or be sad for her

Sista Jane said...

Lmao. Very funny

Olivia Silk Loves Tokio Myers (OLSTM) said...

I have never looked for a job or submitted CV to anybody.
I was retained in the company I served during my Nysc. I have no stories to tell.. Yet.

Here to read comments.

Anonymous said...

Let me go anon before someone who may know me outside because of this story will come and decode me.
I once went for an interview(marketing) and the employer gave me a book on his table and asked me to market it to him. I told him and said
"Oga, this book wey dey my hand so, e dey cure hypertension. Just read am, all your worries go vanish, ifiam!". The man laughed and laughed, he almost choked on laughter. Of course he gave me the job. I hardly fail during interview because of my confidence, dress sense, friendly and out-spoken nature. I basically gist with interviewers cos of the flow, the problem lies in getting to the interview stage.
I once went for an interview, we were told to come 8:am, I was there by 7. We did not leave the company till 8:30pm, we the selected ones btw. The rest left by 5:pm. Someone even fainted, said he had not eaten any thing since taking tea before leaving home around 6:am.
Enough already.

BIPOLAR ME said...

Wow. Some deep stories...

I never job hunted. Finished NYSC, was in my M.Sc class, phone rings, I accept the job, 2 flights to Abuja and one roadtrip for 2 interviews and I got the job. Didn't set my eyes on the man who called me for the job till 6 months after I had resumed and I insisted on coming to see him in his hometown.

It was a covenant between me and God that i would never jobhunt no matter how bad the country was, I did my part of the covenant and God sure did his.

But now that i am thinking of resigning to pursue my actual career, I hope I would have pleasant tales.

St.FranKooL.... said...

#Doing what you like is freedom, liking what you do is happiness*

busybee said...

I'm happy that God came through for you

Broomstick said...

My first job ever was when I was about 16 or 17. Government work that I got just by saying I'd love to be making small money for my fare. I lost that one when we were dismissed as ghost workers even though I had been going to work daily. After that, to get another was a hassle I didn't expect. A family friend told my mum to send me to her office for an interview, that I'd be a shoe in as she already knew me. Got to the office and in my usual talkative but amebo ways, learnt there was no interviews taking place as nothing was advertised, from a chewing gum receptionist. I was baffled but kept my cool. About an hour after my arrival, I was asked to go in to family friend's office by her secretary. As naive as I was, I wasn't completely green so a red flag started waving when "aunty" asked me to shut and lock the door. Note: this was a time in my life I wore short things(skirts, gowns, knickers). She asked me to sit and I did. She was busy gisting with me and I kept wondering when the interview would start. At a point, she offered a drink and when I declined she said she wants and asked me to get from the fridge in a corner of her office. Long story short, she tried to do the do with me and the way I screamed brought her secretary to the door. Aunty assured her all was well and kept telling me the pay would be good plus I'll be her special friend. Mbok, I told her to keep her job and made to leave. She threatened that if I told anybody what had transpired, she'd deal with me. Me that I've been threatened before? I laughed and told her she had more to loose than I did as per BMW. Got home and told my mum the pay was horrible so I couldn't take the job. That evening, aunty came to the house and when she discovered her secret was safe, she was busy winking at herself(idiot). That year, I was never broke cos I dealt with her. She's still a family friend and always my "last resort" when I'm broke. Once she sees my call, she'll be like "ehen madam, you're broke that's why you've remembered me today". Lol. She recently started talking about me getting married to her son. I no want biko.

Broomstick said...

Ooh I forgot about the interview for my one and only hotel work experience. The operations manager and food dept. manager interviewed me for the front desk manager(receptionist, in case you wondered. Lol). I was asked to go that I'd be contacted later. That evening, a strange number called and on answering, I discovered it was the owner. He asked to see me that evening and I politely told him it wasn't possible, could we reschedule? He obliged and we met the following day in the hotel. His own interview was just hilarious to me then but I've since filed it under harassment. He created a scenario where I'd have to leave the front office in response to a summons by a guest in a room. After I told him how I'd react if on getting to the room, the guest wants to do the do, he said he's not satisfied and decided to practicalize. I got to the room and uncle had only boxers on and was sprouting am erection. I thought he put something in his boxers but I was told only recently that he's always tripped for me. I got the job and had fun there, although it was frustrating working there cos even the small money that was to be paid, I left there after being owed for months. Still owing me 3 months pay sef. Randy folks everywhere. Note: I was now constantly on trousers that weren't even tight, so I saw no reason for the attraction

Anwuli Uzu said...

Thank you so much @chikito,have checked for the HR courses in Nigeria, my issue is knowing the company that is legit.can you recommend any for me?Thank you

Anonymous said...

I saw one advert her and applied around last year, was waiting for them to call me all to no avail, I even forgot about it only for them to call me on the 4th of January that I should resume the next day, I told him I wasn't prepared as I was in the east for Christmas that I can only come to Lagos on the 6th which I did, the man did a little interview, asked me simple stuff and then was like what's that purple in your CV all about, I said Sir is an NGO that you fights against gender base violence and the man got scared, was like so u are a feminist and stuff but at the end of the day I got hired. it was nice working with him though he can be spontaneous and has this attitude of changing his managers after 3 months. I was the 6th manager for a farm that just started around August last year.

Blackberry said...

Lol, u go soon go for UN summit in geneva.

Bubul said...

The rate at which this Abuja jobs n men will slut shame women looking for job . You will wonder if after going to school ,pussy is the next criteria for geting a job . I have sufferd in their hand . But God has never slept on my case. You need to see how many married women sleep ard just cuz of this job issue n money . Is so sad eeh.

iuleha virologist said...

I got a job8months after NYSC. I left for school a year later. On getting to ibadan I have been unable to find a job. I am a medical laboratory scientist and I am married to a doctor. My husband hasn't been paid for 6months. We have exhausted our savings. Just last week he got a place for private practice, but the salary will be used to settle debts.
We had a fight yesterday where he accused me of draining him financially. I have been crying. I have submitted CVs in all the labs I know here. Even some schools too without any luck. I even began wondering if I should drop out because I have no money for food or transport to school. Horrible thoughts like prostituting myself at Bere have started creeping into my thoughts. I would like to know where I'm going wrong in my job search. My husband's words really hurt me and I need my own money. I need advice, because I am seriously sinking into depression. I just can't understand how my husband and I who are professionals would be penniless. Please someone who knows where I'm getting it wrong should help me. I can be reached on nadiaenyi@gmail.com.

Chikito The Professional Fire for Fire a.k.a 'Anike' 😂😂😂😂😂 said...

Ok. I'd refer you to the one I did. Remind me on Monday in IHN can't go through my mails now as I dey jolly. Lol

Sexy dove said...

My first interview after my degree.
my sugar daddy got it for me.den he died..i relocated after getting married so I had to leave my job. Since den av bin job hunting while doing my side hustle o( dove errands)

xhlrted p said...

Chikito...hahahaha @interviewers started arguing and one held the other's shirt. Ah I excused myself.
Oh dear.

Mine was 10 years back around 64th road Lekki 2. We got there under heavy rain and muddy waters. The place was good but something was off about the place. 5 man panel, 2 ladies 3 men. They knew little or nothing about the procedures for sustaining their quoted company as it were, FOB checks nothing, CIF checks nothing, every every nothing. Okay what server are you running on? Nothing. I was moping like what da heck?

Finally they dropped the bombshell "They imported security and fire proof doors for a sister company owned by Oga's wife, they needed female marketers". God! I muttered to myself "I'm done for". I excused to the ladies, just washed hands and hit the stairs. Asked my friend to start the car sharp sharp. We zoomed off amidst many unanswered phone calls. Yuck! I felt so bad I pulled my shoes and when I got home,held the over my shoulders and dragged myself in on barefoot.

DH was like Baby how was the Bonny Light people? By the time I was done with the narration he had laughed real hard on the floor and coughing with runny nose.

I called the chic that gave me the referral to warn her. Eish! Till today I verify before I click "submit cv".

Jasmine said...

Death race is a nice movie

Anonymous said...

So what happened? Which company did you choose over PwC?

Anonymous said...

Iuleha. I imported a lot of lab equipments but I have not set it up bc I am still studying the Nigerian environment. Feel free to reply here to see if we can work something out. The machines are in Lagos but I have not decided on location. Good luck.

Anwuli Uzu said...

OK,I will, thank you

Anwuli Uzu said...

Lol,I can imagine ur disappointment

Anonymous said...

Oga, why you dey lie?

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