Oh Women...The slyest cheaters ever!....They cheat and complain when men do!...Yes,i said so!
NARRATIVE NUMBER ONE
CHEATER CHEATING WITH A CHRONIC WOMANIZER
I want to use this opportunity to thank you for all the help you render on this blog. by making people like me pour out our minds, get people's opinions and remain faceless. God bless you. Here's my chronicle.
so I am a married woman of some years with kids. my husband and I met through a mutual friend and I was just coming out of a bad relationship, he seemed safe and serious so I pitched my tent with him and the rest is history. suffice it to say I didn't love him with the kind of crazy passion one wishes for, he was okay and fit all the things I wanted in a man so I stuck to him.
fast forward a couple of years later, having recently lost my job after several years I found myself bored and needing something more.plus my husband cheated on me a year ago and I found out through his phone, being a stubborn person I vowed to retaliate (although that was just the pain) so i met someone who was just a toaster in the beginning and who ordinarily I wouldn't have time for. But bored as I was I gave him a shot and we started talking, for hours everyday, in a few weeks we knew each other well. Now this guy made me feel like a woman something my hubby isn't good at, he complimented me, paid me attention, was patient, didn't judge etc and was also a lot of fun to talk to, I honestly didn't set out to cheat with him but events took over plus my hubby was never there emotionally, we fight all the time, he goes out to drink for.hours after work almost everyday, it was difficult for him to notice something as small as a new hairdo.
so I started seeing this guy in public places, park, mall etc now we have started seeing in hotels and although we haven't officially gbenshed we have done everything but....
This guy is married to multiple women and has countless lovers yet he claims he loves me and he has stopped his womanising ways. As for me, I like him a whole lot but love never enter the matter. He fills a void in me. I can talk to him about anything and everything!
I know it's very stupid to be with a man like that when I have a husband married to only me and who only cheated with one woman but I am a woman with emotional needs and my hubby hasn't and isn't ready to fulfill them even if you hit him on the head (believe me I have tried)
please Stella I need you to use your red pen as brutal as it can be to advise me on the way forward, I don't want to gbensh this guy but I also want him around, I know he's a man and that's the main thing he wants. what do I do to keep it platonic so even if my hubby finds out I can defend myself. Also I want to be free of guilt because for all his faults dear hubby isn't a bad guy at all.
bvs please no insults, if no constructive criticism biko Waka pass. I also would like to hear from housewives in my situation (anonymously of course)
Thank you and happy easter
How can you send in this kind of Chronicles and you will be asking that no one insults you?why dont you divorce your hubby and go pitch your tent with the one who fills your emotional void?
You dont sound like you will stop if anyone advises you to...you are even worse than the husband you complain of....If you dont gbensh with this one,you will gbensh the next one that comes along and you go chop clean mouth waka...I cannot advise you not to gbensh him but please since you do not love your man,why dont you free him cos as i read this your chronicle,what came to my mind was a story that will end with gbenshing.Only you know your mind.Just make sure you try to come to equity with clean hands with this your opio behaviour!
LOL..forgive my calling you that but you said i should be brutal na..
...And oh..remember that after the gbenshing,he might go into voicemail with you...lol
.............................................................................................................
NARRATIVE NUMBER TWO
AMBITION-LESS MEN ARE A TURN OFF?
Stella day i trust you are well. Happy Holy week.
Please this is my chronicle:
I am 28 years and I am dating a guy same age as me. Aunty Stella, I am extremely confused. i have always dated guys at least 8years older than me especially because of maturity and stability, i matured very fast and i think way older than my age so my friends are all way older. We met a few years ago, and I always told myself nothing serious will happen.
All the guys i have dated especially those that have asked for my hand in marriage are way older and some what settled but never got attracted to them. I am attracted to this present guy, he is 28, no job. no stability, no apartment, although he hustles the way he can, but not enough in my eyes, he is very relaxed and he is hoping we get married. (laughs!)
I come from a well to do family (Thank God), him not so much, I get so irritated and completely appalled when a guy is not meeting responsibilities and not hustling earnestly to be at least stable. This guy is the only child and he lives with both his parents here in Abuja, I am the first from a large and known family.
I get sooo discouraged becuase this is not what i want, I cant babysit my husband, it is a complete turn off, i cant dictate, i want to be a cool level-headed wife that treats her husband as a king after God and furnish him with respect but i cant bring myself to respect someone that i perceive as a child with no backbone or decision making power, always on social media posting stupid things. I am a very very strong woman and very ambitious, i need a life partner that will help me grow and we will compliment each other not someone to be babysitting. I am so turned off by this.
Ambition and enthusiasm are my biggest turn on-s, he seems so chilled like he dosent know what able men like him are doing out there.
The more i type this, the more clarity I am getting as regards to permanently breaking off this dumb ass relationship (am just angry, sorry), but I am not God, so many guys have come and none appealed to me. I dont know what God has in mind becuase he knows what will fit me best, I just dont want to be blinded by my wants that i dont see what God might be saying, because we have been in and out of each others life for a few years, only reason I am not succumbing fully is because of his seeming lack of drive and ambition.
I cant be poor or marry a poor man with no prospects, i cant marry a man with no means of being a partner and a man, I cant suffer (God Forbid, TUFIAKWA!!!)
I am soo annoyed thinking about this, even if we are not dating, i cant be friends with guys that have no prospects.
what in the world will i be doing with your ambitionless ass? sheeshh!
Advise me Stella please, am way over my head, thank you.
My dear you have provided the answers to all the questions in your Narrative.....if you cant be with someone like him ''God forbid TUFIAKWA!!!'' then why let it be a headache?
Is tis guy so ambitionless?Hes just 28yrs old and probably still like that cos he stays with his folks and an only child..most men who are like this never grow up but it doesnt mean they dont become successful...think well and all the best
Chronicles!!!
ReplyDeleteBrb.
******LONG LIVE SDK & SDKERS******
@poster1: you are a prostitute with no moral upbringing.
DeleteYou are just too cheap......u painted your hubby bad so it will look as if he is the bad one.
I know you have fucked the dude but just know that 99days is urs but 1day is ur day of judgement.
Keep looking for excuse to cheat...shameless married woman.
Btw,from ur chronicle
(1)you are fat and shapeless
(2)you nag a lot
(3)you need a job
(4)get busy with ur life.
Pls why are u feeling bad @poster1?? Pls enjoy ur self and fuck him wella so long as it's just a fling. As a fellow married woman, shebi men think they are the only ones entitled to cheating and we will always 4 give? They dnt knw painful it is...don't get caught tho, that's d rule! My horseback is always on social media chasing and flirting about. He sends the same message he sends to me to a million other girls and thinks nothing is wrong in it. He chases everything married women inclusive!! So me I cannot be miserable anymore since I found....hhhhhhmmmmmm I feel like a woman!!!! I know the feeling! It's sweet abeg! Since hubby no know E job, we dnt even talk these days, no communication whatsoever cos he will just be on his fone doing pornography or sex chatting I don't feel bad one bit!! And as a woman I cannot and will never be caught. Revenge is sweet!! Jesus!
DeleteAwon chroniclers of today, dem be sisters ni? Both of u should leave ur partners & allow us deal wt dis fuel issue abeg
DeletePoster 1. Just flee every appearance of temptation.
DeletePoster2: I beg dump his lazy dry ass, if not you're gonna end up depressed and frustrated all your life if u end up marrying him.
Pls women,instead of u disgracing urself bcos u want to remain a Mrs. Pls seperate from ur husband. If u cannot Or u r tired of praying,pls walk away and don't cheat. U ppl condem oyinbo ppl but dey don't sit and manage situation bcos dey don't want ppl to mock dem. Dey walk away from a bad situation. Madam poster 1,if u get caught,every1 wld forget what ur husband has bin doing and face u,whether u gbensh dis ur lover or not. For all u knw u may b gv ur hubby a lot of heat dts why he comes back late after drinking,so u too check ur self. Also threaten to end d marriage. Ladies cheating isn't good for any1. Same applies,if ur horseband is a dog,pls stop it,pray for him and protect urself. I grew up with a philandering father and I knw how my mum used to treat herself,but won't tell us, pls don't carry unnecessary disease bcos of marriage. As some1 wrote here earlier and I concur,close ur leg like mermaid if d man is a cheat. No come dey run arnd bcos u r treating syphills and herpes gvn to u from one husband. If he reports u for rejecting him sex or asking for protection b4 sex,tell dem abt his philandering ways. Pls women don't cheat,walk away from a toxic situation dt wld bring u unnecessary disgrace.
DeletePoster 2,keep searching for dangote. You will find him at 48. Why not encourage him, why not nudge him a little. The fact you dont see him with millions, does that translate to him being visionless. This ibo girls. If na me, i go use you do ritual, walahi.then you go see ambition. He is cool headed. Trust me, if he gets his chance, he will move in. Na when him do yahoo, or rob be hustling?. You no dey read News see as the country hard?.you are from a popular family. Push him a job and see if he rejects it. Dumb ass thot.
DeletePoster 1 : you be real devil ... I pray may God nor let my brother marry woman like you... You get mind sha to post this kind rubbish to aunty Stella
DeleteThis comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
ReplyDeleteHuh?
DeleteU be pussy doctor?
DeleteLmao @momo babe
DeletePoster 2
ReplyDeleteAbeg shut the hell up and stop ranting! If he's not good enough for you, why not call it off and face front?
Why did you come here to nag when you know the answer to your problem? Hiss*
Foolish narrative!
Take it easy on poster 2... Lol
DeleteYou're always bitter and insulting in your advise. That's unlady like.ok. Razzoid
DeleteQuickie,though poster 2 is just plain annoying with all these complaints when she already knows the solution to her problem,she made valid points.I hate lazy guys with passion.Guys with no ambition. Age is not an excuse not to be ambitious.Stella, at 28,that guy should have moved out of his parents' house or at least have something doing.
DeleteVery foolish to the core.
DeletePoster 2 pls deal wit your nagging attitude and i smell pride in you.
Poster two what's ur problem? U say don't like d guy cos he has no ambition, so? Them tie ur legs there? Is he forcing u with gun to date him?
ReplyDeleteHaaa!
P1: An idle mind is indeed the devil's workshop. That's what pushed u into d arms of a player. For God's sake get busy!
DeleteIt's natural for a woman who lacks attention to give in to any man who as much as gives her that attention, even if he is a player.
He is filling d emotional void ur hubby isn't and seems not to care to fill. What u shld be doing right now u is to focus on fixing ur marriage.
U said u've tried but have u tried bringing God into ur marriage? Have u tried praying for ur husband?
Pls visit virtueandintimacy.com and read how to handle a difficult spouse.I believe it will help u.
If u keep up with that player, be sure u'll sleep with him any time soon and if u don't want that, why not go home and focus on working out ur marriage. God can do all things. All things.
P2: U already have ur answer. U sound like u are just using this medium to rant and it's okay.
Poster 1 ..My husband is everything. Hes handsome and caring. My only issue is he's not romantic at all. I mean when we want to have sex he just turns , touch my boobs (which doesn't turn Mr on) then next thing I give him a head and we have sex...it's so boring these days I feel like crying . I don't even think we have kissed this year. I miss my ex alot . My ex is that kinda guy you do everything with. We run around the house even the streets. We had names for everything...we even had karaoke Fridays. The only reason we didn't get married was cos of religion. DH is not even 1 percent romantic so I can't stop thinking about ex...infact I'm crying right now. ..Don't want to send in a chronicle. But I know I won't cheat on hubby. Will just settle for this. The only painful thing is sometimestill I touch myself to cum when he's not around and that makes me feel dirty...Been praying to God to give me the grace to forget about getting an orgasm. It's not easy been a woman.
Delete@anonymous 18:08 have you tried introducing some of these things you miss into your marriage.
DeleteHow about telling your husband where to touch you before sex. If he loves you, he ll make an improvement.
I almost laughed. You know why? I'm in a worst shoe than you. Oh dear, the day I will publicly speak , women and men will cry for me. Shame can't even let me start or even talk....
DeleteThough it shouldn't even be the sef anyways. It should be the chemistry. The Flow, the communication. Without that - it's just all about kids and misery and moments. Some day, oh someday I will talk and boldly too. Someday
Bae you need to talk to your husband, he may not be aware that you are not happy with the xes. Don't you guys communicate?
DeleteThis comment has been removed by the author.
DeletePoster one, go ahead n fuck d man with plenty wives! I hope u r caught so that u can have ur wish...hahahahahahaa.
ReplyDeletePoster 1 go and pick your brain where you left it.
ReplyDeleteSo because you haven't slept with someone makes it better right?
You claim to have tried everything with your husband, have you told him you found out he cheated that's if he still isn't.
Communication is very important for any relationship to make head way.
I keep saying it better to walk away from a bad situation than stay and do terrible things to yourself in the name of making up for what could have been.
You made a vow before man and God
Your hubby broke his by going out to meet another woman, fight with him and talk to God.
Stop getting emotionally attached to a man who is not even as good as your husband.
I don't even know what you want.
If you can't work it out with you hubby, get a divorce and look for someone who can do those things you want.
Poster 2 kini point e?
Why are you still looking hia way or thinking about him look for the one with ambition na abi what's the essence of your story.
You can't date him then leave him aunty.
My dear, you wont understand what it means to be married to a man who is just cold and wants his peace when you are burning with passion. When you want to be loved passionately but all you get is coldness. He comes home after hanging out then rolls over and goes to bed. Or if he wants some. Gets some without bothering with how you feel and then rolls over and goes to bed.
DeleteWhats a woman to do about her emotional needs.
You will never understand till you wear the shoes. Don't judge so harshly. And no I am not the poster.
Chop knuckle
Delete*Larry was here*
Poster 2 is having sex with the guy already
DeleteYou talk too much without offering any sensible advise. Rufe baki nki kinjik?
Delete@anonymous 15:55.I know that feeling. When you talk about how y ou feel, y ou are nagging. Then you keep quiet and expect them to understand you have emotional needs hmmm,you are on a long thing.
DeleteIf he cheats, and your conscience won't kill you, please feel free to do whatever makes you feel loved.
So what if they are having it already? Just get out and stop being judgmental. Who the hell do you think you are?
DeleteWhen marriage has been limited to let's have sef cause of kids. Sex in some marriages will make you google procedures for divorce
DeleteP2 you women complain too much.
ReplyDeleteCan't you see Nigeria is hard and doesn't favour anything that does not have a p*ssy!!!
Blah blah blah. You think he likes the way things are for him ni???
P1. You can't eat ur cake n have it. If you eat it n decide to still have it, it will be either through sh*t or vomit. Can U live with the sh*t????
Shat ap there!
DeleteP1 don't do it...P2..u don solve ur problem finish na,leave him.
ReplyDeletePoster1 this is foolishness at its peak... This is as far as I can go without insulting you
DeleteWhy are you looking for excuse to cheat on your hubby... If you guys don't connect emotionally, communication is the key
If he doesn't notice your hair what's wrong with saying "honey I made my hair today"
Na wa oo
Marriage is sacred... And you've already cheated on your hubby already, ask God genuinely for forgiveness and he will take your guilt away
How do most women end up with a Man they have no atom of Love for?.. how?. U dnt love him, yet u marry him..u dnt love him yet u date him.. and then u end up with such chronicles.. sigh
DeletePoster 1,u said u are stubborn.
ReplyDeleteNo man can happily marry u.Asawo.
U are even a former divorcé.
Keep whoring around until ur current horseband send u parking again. I know u must be an "O" person.
@Money maker, where did poster 1 wrote she's a divorce? SMH
Delete*Larry was here*
Which one is "O" people? Is that the new name now
DeleteO for ofemmanu,hahahaha,this James can make me laugh no be small.
DeletePoster 2.
ReplyDeleteHow many 28 year old men in Naija are thinking of marriage ... You better leave him , don't go and push him to do money ritual because of your Gra Gra o ...
He's not reading to hustle, fine - sit down and count your teeth . Then it's better u leave the relationship quietly .
Go watch toke's recent vlog on compromise ... She says ; u can compromise on things like foood, clothes but not serious stuff as finance and religion . Cos those things would never change .
Good luck .
Poster 1
Know God
Poster 2.. He is poor, he is this , he is that, I don't want to marry a poor man, I don't want to suffer .... Yet you don't want to leave him ...what do you want us to tell you now? .........LEAVE HIM SO THAT YOU WILL NOT BE LIKE POSTER one IN FUTURE
ReplyDeletePoster 1...... I reject you as a wife to my brother or enemy.. No matter what we tell you now, you will still FUCK that guy.. Infact you've already had sex with him .... May God forgive you
He cheated, y shouldn't she? Where is it written that only men must cheat? Abeg u guys should leave d poor woman alone jare. Woman do whatever mks u happy but don't get caught!!!
DeletePeople will just come and b asking for stupid advise,mtcheww
ReplyDeleteCan u imagine?
DeleteI tire oh! The guy is poor, yet you can't leave him
DeletePoster 1 you need Jesus
ReplyDeletePoster2 why the rant? Since he's not what you want, why not free him
Poster one really need Jesus
DeleteI can't believe the cheat signed off by wishing us happy Easter! Mgbo piapukwagi Isi...
ReplyDeleteLmao!
DeleteLol is not bad to wish u happy Easter. Pls free d woman lol
DeleteHmmmmm Poster1, let me go anon.
ReplyDeleteI ve bin whr u are n passed. U lso fill his void. He makes u complete. Thinking of him, u r satisfied n not moved by hubby's attitude especialy not seeing ur needs. Married for yrs I can say I can count d num of times DH n I ve gbenshed. I neva wanted to gbensh dis guy but I loved it. Staying wit a man for almost 2yrs no sex yet pple admire u as ideal couple. Wt more cud I ask. A very nice guy I cud giv my all for. Maried n wife wasn't meeting up. Started wen I was redy to break out of d mariage. Hmmmm wetin I neva do wit dis guy? Only threesome remain n bdsm too. In his past n future, he wil neva ve any good woman like me. Rest sex act name am, n am happy. We break up n make up. He gave me sanity. But d last fuck was a fuckiing fuck up fuck off. Now I know it's over. FUN! Am done. N no more bcos I no wnt body counts.
Rshp ws good. U ask ursef y somtin dis good is dt bad.
I miss him. He's alive but wen I remember I say Rest In Peace. Make I wok my salvation. As for hubby, him get am n can't use it.
Una must gbensh n d rshp no go get head especialy as u ve kisds n house wife. I was n still working.
Just so u know wats before u.
Bless u sis!
Madam 1 stop lying to yourself you have gbenshed already you're just looking for a way to stay relevant with the womanizer,nowadays me sef need advice, I cant fit give you something I don't have....
ReplyDeleteAll this posters Fast Forwording and Rewinding, who give una remote? Naija ppl can follow trend eh, Poster 1: you're shameless, period!!! How can u confidently be seen in public & hotels with a man, and ure married.
ReplyDeletePoster2: there are 7billion humans on earth, if ure not comfortable with one, you let go na.... Are u married to him already?
I thought I was the only one that get irritated by guys that change their dps too frequently and always changing status on Facebook.
ReplyDeleteOnly one person will have nairaland account, Facebook, twitter, instagram, IMO, snap chat, FaceTime, Skype, viber, kik, yahoo messenger, whatsap, bbm. Wetin!
The day a toaster listed all this as the social medias he has account with ehn, the way I dumped him fear me sef. He even bookmarked Linda Ikeji and Laila's blog in his phone.
That's how you know idle lazy mofos
Bless u sister.
DeletePoster 2...I feel so sorry for you, you sound like a braggadocios person, glad u admitted that the guy hustles but it ain't enough, the worse phase of a man's life is btw 24-32...its not Easy it's nigeria these days, what u shld be worried about is 1. His he educated? 2. Does he know God? 3.are u physically attracted to him...don't write any guy of. .time and chance happen to them all..my life is a testimony, I was humiliated, called names by my ex...my people when God picked my call..I blow..I'm presently building my 3rd house. If u love a guy and he has dreams and he dares to chase them...my dear just encourage and pray for him
ReplyDeleteMy brother,you are just there,some ladies lack understanding.if you think your guy is a broke ass dude and has no ambition then leave him,but if you still like him or cherish him and he tries his best, support him by getting him a job contact since you claim you come from a wealthy family. Most girls talk shits I don't know why......broke ass this broke ass that and you still with him.please,if you adore him,pray for him and ask God's favour upon his life. I wonder when some Naija babes will have wisdom.
DeletePoster 1,try and knack that guy so that ur blood will cool down and please continue knacking him till u are tired.
ReplyDeletePoster 2,did u send in this chronicless to criticise the young man? Go and look for old men,since they are turn on for you,leave the vissionless young man alone,maybe u are the one giving him badluck.
@ poster one stop torturing yourself.. ..if you feel like have him with a condom except he lives on your street. My partner is a cheat too ,so two can play the game. ...But make sure you okay safe.
ReplyDeleteHmmmm.don't know how to analyse all this iranu..
ReplyDeletePoster 1,you have answers to ur problems.leave ur husband and folo d other man..ode oshi.u need to be delivered from evil.
Poster 2..u ave answered all.ur chronichle is full of question and answer,so why do u need us to tell u wat to do again
Let me sit on my mat and read comment from wise BVs.also waiting to read james comment...fool ursef again
Mc pinky
@poster 1
ReplyDeleteGo and look for a job...get busy!
Idleness makes one to think and do dirty things!Distance yourself from that guy,he will just fuck and dump u.
As for your hubby,forgive him !Try to draw your him closer,pet him,be nice to him and before you know it,things b/w u two might change for the better.Maybe its your attitude that pushes him to other women.....
@poster 2
Be patient,your dream man will soon come.
Poster 1.u obviously hv made ur decision. U do nt need any advice. Besides,if u respect ur husband, u'll sit ur ass dwn at home.
ReplyDeletePoster2..uve answered ur question urself. Besides, stellz, I do nt agree with ur advice. My husband is abt same age, an only child but he has achieved a lot. She shld leave d dude if she can't stand his "ambitionlessness"(is Dat even a word). Besides, big things start small.
P1: it's easy to say I love" when he is strenger. Am sure if you were married to him hmnnmm it would have been hell. All the same I will tell you brutally as u want it, this will lead to ur martial failure shld u continue and bear in mind Mr Casanova will not marry you, even if he does, u 'll see hell here on earth, Shey u still have little space to say "lol" Uhu,ur next chronicles will be all tears. I don't know why people feel so comfortable committing adultery and laughing about it.. rubbish.
ReplyDeleteP2: you sound total unserious and unstable. If your family is well to do and u sincerely like the man in question, why can you use some influence and help secure him a job, abi nor be person dey help person? Is only when you 've done something for someone and he/she isn't changing than u can start using all those derogatory remarks like tufiakwa etc
I agree with your advice for poster 2. She actually sounds poor to me. Maybe she has known poverty before and doesn't want to go back there. You have no faith in your guy, leave him alone to find his help meet. You goan find your rich old man (who will come with his baggage). Your case reminds me of one of the characters in "think like a man 1".
DeleteIn jesus name,every spirit of bad woman coming my way as a wife.fall down and die die die die.this is for u poster one
ReplyDeleteMc pinky
These days you are becoming more and more stubborn and notice me. I don notice you. Lmao!
DeleteNo mind am @all jare!!!! Serious notice me,with his nonsense English e go dey break sumtimes....
DeleteN1, stupidity in d highest order. N2 stupider than d first narrative. Can u imagine?
ReplyDeleteFirst poster:
ReplyDeleteAs a housewife, I answer your call. The way to hell is paved with good -yes, I said it. After all, we were told that it is broad whereas that of heaven is narrow (that means difficult to access).
I will give you the same piece of advice I gave my friend (let's call her Ada). She was hurt because her husband fucked her bridesmaid and even made "porn" out of it. I asked her, "are you going to divorce him", she said "no". (mind you, the man was remorseful, which she also admitted.) Then I said, "work it out, pray it out, wait it out . . . be calm and let him try to decode you etc." She instead grabbed an ex's penis and sucked and fucked. This was an ex that was hurting from being dumped for the "rich guy". Now, when she eventually made up with her hubby, she dumped the ex again; bad move. The guy sent "everything" to both her phone and the husband's phone and even the phone of her pastor whom they both had had counsel from and earthquakes began. Her marriage was over in less than 24 hours. She couldn't attend church again, she slipped into major depression, lost her job and so on. Mind you that she had her hubby's porn on her phone too. But no one was interested in that one.
So, go on lady, keep meeting in all the places and as for fuck; on your max, set, booooooooooooooom! Na boko haram bomb be dat!
God bless you honey
DeleteAbeg shut up jor. So the husband couldn't forgive a 'revenge' cheating. So when the guy acts silly forgiveness is guaranteed but the lady is not allowed to act silly and be forgiven. Mschew nonsense.
DeleteBut the marriage wasn't over when her husband did his own abi.he expected her to forgive him aturu ocha.
DeleteFuck up. Advise her to send her hubby's porn to his parents and her parents so the blame on her will reduce. To her pastor too. Men shouldn't be getting away with everything
Delete*weed has spoken*
@Imo chic on point
DeleteThe part of life truth that is hard to swallow for women is that life is for men. The Scriptures and Natural laws point to this. Men were here first before women and out of the man came the woman, and that, my friend, is irreversible! The choices you have is to live with it, be angry with it and resist it within you at the cost of your own peace of mind and psychological health or better still go create your own universe. But under this one God and his laws - The woman will remain subject to the man who knows his onions. Kill yourself if you want!
DeleteP.1 have the two men in your life meet, that way it will jump start your decision to gbensh ur lover or stay with your hubby.
ReplyDeleteP.2 you said while typing it got clearer to you, so u know what to do what advice do u need again? Best of luck to the two of you.
Poster2: Leave that situationship alone. You are ambitious........he is not and you will hate him if he remains the way he is. See how it works:
ReplyDeleteYou dodge the red flags and ignore your screaming instincts to marry this guy.........you are going to learn to:
1. Feel embarassed at his display of immaturity....... feeling awkward at his inability to flow with intelligent conversations.
2. Walk on egg-shells trying to teach him how to be ambitious.......if it's not in him, it's a wasted effort.
3. Manage the boredom and misery of settling with a man who does not match your level of intelligence.
4. Loose interest in your marriage and resent hom bitterly coz for a highly driven young woman like you, intellectual stimulation from a partner is major foreplay.
5. Make most of the decisions and give him credit to keep the peace.
6.Constantly rely on yourself for advise which would make you vulnerable to any smart man out there who wants you.
7. Fighting with him coz he would catch on fast on his inadequacies but he is a man-child, so he will feel emasculated.
8.You will fight the urge to train kids who you hope will be opposites of their unambitious dad.......it wil show trust me and he would notice and feel threatened.
9.In a bid to feel good about himself, he will cheat with anything.......househelp, neighbours to spite and "humble"
you.
10.You would hate yourself so bad for settling for less and getting less than what you settled for.
11.You could revenge cheat with that posh guy that picks your brain but wouldn't want your baggage........or you would divorce him and..........
Way out of this gloomy future--------Go for your type, go for your class.........go for that man who you would be compatible with.......wait if you can for him........ you would love him.
You are from a comfortable home, do not go below that in the name of love and desperation....... you already resent this guy, you will hate yourself further if you push it. Do not sacrifice your youth/life for a man-child.
That social media attention seeking part though almost made me throw up............So superficial and idle.
Poster1: See how devil is blushing on your behalf. If you are tired of your marriage, pack it up responsibly. Go for counselling and other means if you want it back....... that man you are eyeing........well hope you know, satan's promotion is Shame and disgrace.......see how desirable sin looks like......... you will be shamed at the end.....wise up!
U said it all Empress Cho. Nothing is as damaging emotionally and mentally as settling for someone who is below you intelectually, mentally, psychologically and spiritually. Only desperate women do this and often end up bitter all their life's. I almost fell victim to these when i was only 22. Can u imagine...Thank God i came to my senses and would never manage a man.
DeletePoster 1, woman, thou art loosed! On a serious note, you are a slut. Poster 2, dump him and stop whining. I like the fact that you are a very ambitious girl, your boy friend does not fit into your dreams. Marriage is not usually about love, we fall in and out of love in most cases. Therefore be guided by character and purpose when choosing your spouse.
ReplyDeletePoster 2:you wrote from the deepest of hearts and I find your chronicle very sincere.This is who you are and this is what you want, go for it and move on.This guy is not MEANT for you,he won't change since you have been together for a while now and has shown to be the same,please move on.If you marry him and he still continues to be the same, trust me,your love for him will disappear and will be replaced with irritation, trust me.
ReplyDeleteBut most of all,like I see from your post,you value God more and you believe in what He can do for you and also all He ever does is parmanent, pitch your tent nearer to Him the more,talk to Him in every given opportunity and I believe He will grant you your heart desire.
Don't give up!
Thank you empress chi, thank u olu sweets, thank you eminado. God bless you.
DeleteI think they have gbenshed. Gbenshing created a soul tie that is making it difficult for her to breakup with him, even though she dislikes his guts. Abeg try to move on, because if even God asks you to stay, you will still resent the guy. God does not force anyone to do what they don't want to do.
DeletePoster two if the guy doesn't want to grow,mature,work and still keeps acting like a kid at 28 years old pls leave him. You are just my type of person,you are a strong woman,look for a man who's matured and very focused on working/achieving his vision
ReplyDeletePoster 1 you are a disgrace to womanhood,oshisco if you like go carry Hiv nonsense!
Poster 1; it's obvious u've got needs and ur hubby isn't an option anymore......
ReplyDeleteTo think that you'd keep it platonic with prince charming is madness;
My question is for how long?
Yeah it's live a race after happiness but if what you are faced with is one which wouldn't last at all.
So why don't u take a permanent approach to this thing; and still remain the Good woman you've. Always been.
The complexity of your case is well understood: but like Stella said don't end up becoming worse than what u already paint your hubby to be.
Best of luck.
Poster 2; na by force to babysit your bobo ni?
Abi dem tie you rope with the guy?
Why don't u sit him down;table your issues and come to some even grounds?
But if you've already don that;ngwanu start to waka oh!
Poster1: is it till u sleep with him befor you know you've cheated? If you're going to leave your hubby,is it with a man that has this much bagges of many wives and children? You think you love him cos he complements your new hairdo,madam,think again o. If you are not happy with your hubby,take a walk pls and stop justifying a wrong.
ReplyDeletePoster2: since he lacks ambition and the many things you wrote and advising yourself in the process,what do you want us to add again? You have said it all. Find a man with ambition and drive.
Second poster:
ReplyDeleteIF YOU LOVE THIS MAN, then you have conquered. Love does not keep records of wrong. Your head seems to be full of "the wrong side of this guy". Those that were "made" never appealed to you. You are from a well to do, known family. Answer these questions:
Is this guy schooled; a graduate: Why not help him get a job? (even if you won't marry him)
If you make up your mind to marry him, why not tell him to "leave town, his parents etc." and come to some other place and set up business etc.? Have you ever really gotten down to discuss your basic dislikes with him? If you do and he treasures you, he will quickly drop those child-like ways and man up. if not, then move on!
Honestly I have done all u said and even more. He will be cool for a while and then when we fight he starts posting pictures of other women to spite me. I have tried all I can, but I am still developing myself, trying to start a business. It feels so uneven. Doesn't feel like I am with a man sometimes.
DeletePoster just walk away,my hubby is 8years older than me and some times he acts childish,talk less of your mate, just run.
DeleteTwo wrongs they say doesn't make it right poster 1. Please women lets stop d payback. Initially we know 90% men cheat unfortunately its almost 50 50. Just bcus of d mind set" if he can do it so can I" but we forget something 'oh thou man/woman though are inexcusable'
DeletePoster 1. You are so annoying instead to concentrate on your marriage and look for ways to put it together. You dey prostitute up and down
ReplyDeleteYour so called man friend is just after your honey pot,I wonder weda he stil dey honey sef mtcheeeew.
Poster 2.You already know what you want then stop ranting here.
Hey Poster 2,
ReplyDeleteI'm amazed at how similar our stories are.
I actually sent in a chronicle to Stella about my boo who was seemingly carefree about his jobless state a full year after doc studies. I was wrong, and things are much, much better. I'm super glad I didn't walk away.
Instead of the things you hate about him, what are the things you love about him?
Focus on those things, and try to help him thru the bad/unattractive qualities.
Is he a Christian, and does he make effort to change his situation in life, no matter how little?
In all, I'd say try to shift your focus. If it still doesn't work, then take a walk quietly, save his heart.
May God grant you wisdom for the next steps.
O.M.A.
Poster 1.
ReplyDeleteJust go and fuck him and let us have peace... and trust me when he is done he will dump u and look for another fresh pussy.
u told us, he is married to several women, which means he is a serial husband, do you think you are better than those people he has before you? You get AC for Toto abi?
Those kind of men are always sweet and will seem to b everything you are missing at home and after he is done, he will Jejely ignore you and you are back to square one.
That time you will feel used and will b looking for all kind of scope to make your marriage work.....
Na your type get that Fish brain dem dey talk say women get.
Poster 2.
What do you want? he is not your type then jejely move on.
U are Comfortable, thank God, why not look for guys in your class who will meet all this your standard and leave this poor boy alone to carry his cross.
Let's think critically, how many 28yrs old men in this our country can boost of a good job that can take care of a family? We all know the situation of our economy now.
I tell you for free that, since you are from a very comfortable family, why not try and assist him with job (if u are sure he won't break your heart) and both of you will be happy.
I tell people that, the quality of your relationship affects the quality of the life you live.
God created the rich to bless the poor, and if you can't be his own blessing please flush yourself out of his life and let him carry his cross alone and stop lamenting
Omg!i and poster 2 both think alike.We should be friends,please please please let's be friends😩
ReplyDelete@Poster 1-Comments or reactions of people on social media have been observed to make the greatest impact. Personally I find it so worrisome how people get negatively influenced reading other people's comment. Madam ur revenge attitude was picked from reading other people's comments on social media. U will be the looser in the end. Remember that the number of persons who read this ur chronicle are far more than those who commented.just that these few persons chose to react meaning it is not everything wrong u do that u get instant punishment. A lot of the very serious punishments are doing press up ahead of their launching. Be fair to ur self to accept the wrath when it comes because it will come and not even ur husband will escape his as well.what is wrong is wrong.let no sweet use of English or slang or coded names deceive us into assuming or temporarily believing wrong to be right.kpang!
ReplyDeletePoster one suit yourself.
ReplyDeletePoster two you don't need any more advice cos you have already advice yourself.
ReplyDeleteP.1.it situation is painful, but pleaseeeeeeeeeeeèeeeeèeeeeeeeee don't straph d guy.d moment u do it,u won't c him again.Just allow him go
ReplyDeletep.2.u hav d answer to ur rants cos that's what u just did.rant!
P.1.d situation is painful, but pleaseeeeeeeeeeeèeeeeèeeeeeeeee don't straph d guy.d moment u do it,u won't c him again.Just allow him go
ReplyDeletep.2.u hav d answer to ur rants cos that's what u just did.rant!
I am fucking tipsy.
ReplyDeleteGo get laid.
DeleteReally? Don't 4get ur condoms.
DeleteOh say hi 2 "tipsy"
Poster2,break up with him if you can't stand him instead of all this long story
ReplyDeletePoster1,from frying pan to fire.May God help you
ReplyDeletePoster 1: If u like urself, no do am oo, neva ends well. It is better you divorce d man than all this further mess u r putting urself into.
ReplyDeletePoster 2: free the young man abi u wan end up like poster 1? If u love am, use ur family influence find am job n stop ranting.
At poster 1 I guess you don't even know the meaning of easter because if you do you wouldn't have posted this today of all day
ReplyDelete
ReplyDeleteI am tempted to type " gbensh, straff,fxxk,shag the guy already!!!" These days most men are emotionally deficient and don't seem to care but babe,hold am there. Get busy, find something doing like sewing, bead making, hairdressing, baking anything at all and put the dammed son of a bitch(horseband) out of your mind and pray for him when you are sober. Most times I wonder if they are gay trying to live "normal" lie...oops! Life! I just hope this cross is a test, really it is becoming freaking irritating. Quicksilver and Portable Viv both of you should keep your dirty holes sealed if you have nothing sensible to contribute in adult conversations. Bunch of pretenders waiting for men that will fall for their "innocence
Not right
ReplyDeleteNot right
ReplyDelete1.You are emotionally and sexually deprived by your husband but that doesn't justify what you are doing.
ReplyDeleteADULTERY IS A SIN. God is merciful but do we continue to take him for granted?
Can you not place this problem in his hands and patiently wait for his solution? God is interested even in small details of our lives.
Just remember that whatever you sow, you must reap.
Poster 2.
ReplyDeleteYou sound proud. I can't do this, I can't do that... You're irritating.
If you detest his attitude so much and feel you can't help him, then go find someone else. While waiting for Mr. Ambitious, work on changing your bad attitude. You're the type that will marry a rich man and still complain. Tufia kwa!
Poster 1,i will advice get busy,if u don't have a job yet learn baking or something u find interesting this will make u think less abt ur hubby's wrongdoing, also ignore the other guy cos u may regret it.Discuss with ur hubby and u never knw. Take all to God in prayer
ReplyDelete