Stella Dimoko Are You A Boss Or Leader?


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Thursday, January 25, 2018

Are You A Boss Or Leader?

Many employees are of the assumption that being saddled with so much responsibility should put a fence between you and your subordinates at work. 

While this might work in some scenarios (e.g companies with strong power culture), it may not work in others. As with everything, balance is key.

The most important quality a good leader should have is GOOD COMMUNICATION SKILLS. Remember communication is a two-way thing: 1. Ensuring the receiver totally and completely understands the information you are trying to send; 2. Understanding what message the receiver is trying to pass across. When employees are acting out what they may not have the courage to say to you, a boss would ignore and just make sure they get the job done. However, a leader should be sensitive to these behavioural patterns and do the mature thing by addressing any issues on ground very firmly.

Another quality a good leader has is EMPATHY. Try as a much as possible to put yourselves in the next person’s shoes. It can be difficult sometimes as people may try to take advantage of this aspect of you. But, before you express that you have had it with a bugging situation; let there be at least one instance where you have tried to ‘understand’ with it. For instance, if you notice a person is cranky at work, a boss would walk in and scold them about their attitude; but a leader oud try asking them if all is well in their personal life. You can then move on to stating that the reason why you are asking is because of their work attitude. Showing that you care (even if you really don’t –lol) is a good way to drive the message home.

CONSTRUCTIVE FEEDBACK is very important. Many superiors do not do this because they don’t want to be seen as being too harsh, blunt etc. Other times, favouritism comes in to play. So when your favourite employee does something wrong and you don’t complain; it makes it more difficult to express some level of disappointment when another person repeats it. This should not be so in a work environment. Even if the defaulting individual is the highest performer, it is good to give feedback. It helps them to build on their strengths and generally fosters personal development. A leader would give feedback by appraising the person on the things they have done right, before you drop the negative ‘bombshell’. A boss would just drop it like it’s hot and not give a hoot – lol. People may not always take feedback the right way, but remember it is part of your job to help them grow.

PRACTICING WHAT YOU PREACH is a very key attribute in leadership. When you make a rule, try not default. It is easier to make everyone show up on time, by showing up on time; and more difficult to tell them to come early by just shouting about it. Same goes for dress codes, task delivery and communication. It’s easy being a boss just be talking, however a leader acts out what they speak about.

I will stop here for now.

Do you have any good boss/ bad boss experiences? What remarkable leaders and leadership qualities have you come across in the course of life and/or career?

BV Chikito


  1. anonymous to bahd25 January 2018 at 12:31

    Bit of both, truth is you can't succeed by being entirely one or the other. Flexibility, dynamism, etc. I'm more of a leader, because I tend to join in work by showing & doing, then I supervise. However, I'll be more of whichever is needed to get the job done.

  2. Ooose! Chikito
    I aspire to get better. I never arrive

  3. The popular slang here is drop your home problems at the gate, when you are going back, take them with you. Your blog personality is the 'drop it like its hot' kind, lol. That empathy thing is so key. I wish I could send this to one Oga like that. He likes to act tough even when we know he is sleeping with our colleague.

  4. That last one ehn .
    So I sent mail last year before we closed that everyone should resume on 3rd January ( As instructed by Oga at the top). I already knew in my mind that one as gon break that rule. And I didnt even send a mail requesting for break or sth at least to be taken out of my 2018 leave days.
    As Madam, I resumed on the 8th.
    I won't even tell you what happened that week.
    Do what you preach!
    Nice one Chikito.

    I am a good leader. I sure know that. It's easier for me cuz they are all men tho. I thank God.

  5. Do you have any good boss/ bad boss experiences? What remarkable leaders and leadership qualities have you come across in the course of life and/or career?

    I have had a bad supervisor. She wasn't wicked or anything. She just didn't know her job. And didn't teach us anything either. She spent her office hours reading novels online. She used is as her errand girls. From buying baby food to picking up baby from school. I couldnt even report to anybody.

    Now I am in her position, and I learnt to not donallnthe things she did. I teach as much as possible. I make deliberate efforts not to send anybody in personal errands.
    I have a great boss now. Just great.

    2nd question.
    I haven't worked for a very long time but the leadership qualities in have learnt is -
    Respect. Respect the people who work for you.
    Don't talk down on them.

  6. I and a colleague were just talking about this the other day. My boss is a leader. He is rarely seen as a boss because he is that good as a leader.
    But our manager, oh Lord... she is a serious boss, very bossy, she can't even cover you up in front of the boss. Coreect u, nba, tell you what to do nba, even when the boss is angry to help you out no. She will rather add pepper.
    Sh wouldn't correct you o, when the boss talks about it that is when she will start talking, adding pepper, that she was even thinking the same thing blah, blah.
    Why is it that when some people are giving small power na war?

  7. This reminds me of my PPA in Lekki,OMG,the woman is crazyyyy!
    I only stayed for 3months and it seemed like 3years!!!!!
    I chose a fashion house cos I wanted to go into fashion designing,I'd learnt to sow a bit after graduation,I was her PA,the manager,store keeper!
    She had issues with going for CDS on Thursdays and would say I should come after wch I refused(she paid me 15k monthly).we go shopping in eko 2x per week and I'd go alone sometimes,there would be something wrong with everything I brought even from her customers!!!things got out of hand the day I went to eko after 5pm and got back to Lekki almost 9pm,she complained about packs of blade n some things that its fake and wanted me to come in the next day wch is CDS to go return,I didn't go,got to the office for friday to screams/tantrums and walking me was almost end of the month and she delayed my clearance letter for 3weeks then back dated it.
    Just yesterday I went to one of her customers in the market(he had become mine too over the years) and he was gisting me the cray-cray she displayed with him in the market!!!
    If she fighting with her husband,na So so scream and vex to all the workers that day,

  8. Nice one chikitođź‘Ť.
    That mean my boss is a leader but a bad one

  9. Am a little bit of both.
    Well done chikito


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