Stella Dimoko Korkus.com: Mama Nnuku's Gist Corner - Free Food.Free Slap

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Saturday, January 20, 2018

Mama Nnuku's Gist Corner - Free Food.Free Slap

Salute !



The Gist:

So last week a friend invited me for a program in her church, my first question was food go dey? Lol

And she said plenty of it.. Oh Jeovah! See as God wan take answer my prayer for this January

I told her I would be there, and on the said day, I knack my Christmas hair, wear my Christmas shoe and cloth , arranged two new poly bag inside the big bag wey I carry, I had intention of packing enough food that will last for the month (lol) and off to church I went ..



As usual singing and preaching took place and it was time for food , yaaaaaaaay .. guess what?

my friend was among those sharing the food , Isn’t this God just a sweet God?

As the plate of food was flying around I brought out my polythene bag and started pouring food inside . lmao wether person dey look me or not e no concern me , I packed enough jollof rice , moi-moi and drinks and my poly bag full .. I even put extra moi moi inside the bag when the polybag no contain am again.


After the menu - menu na, there was singing and praises and another round of prayers, that how one girl “gbe emi” o. Tell a Yoruba person to translate “gbe emi” to u biko.. and asked that I be brought forward



Yeeee! Tanimose ? (who I offend) lmao . I moved forward and the lady asked me to kneel so I knelt down


She said some people should come forward, she stated women and some women came forward, then she said they should start slapping me, Huh? Before I could say a word the first slap that landed on my face sent my wig flying outta my head , oh my world , I collect slaps eehn , while the slap was going on


My mind begin play pranks with me sheybi na food you come chop? God catch u (lol)


Another voice in my head said but you have packed enough jollof rice and moi-moi na, enjoy the slaps and console yourself with the food later (lmao)

Finally the slap stopped and I was asked to go and sit down, I was still trying to process and digest what just happened, so I decided to wait till the prayers finished so they can come and explain why I was slapped .


After prayer finished I didn’t see the girl that “Gbe emi” I started looking for her and asked around and they said I couldn’t see her right away that she is on the mountain.


I went to meet the person that invited me , and she said she is doing as the holy spirit directed


Egbami Keeh! Kilo sele gan gan

I am going to the church on Sunday , and I am going to wear a trouser under my gown , they must give me a logical reason why I chopped free slap .. else lol ..

But after this one I no dey follow anybody go chop free food anywhere again , I have learnt my lessons

We have come to the end of this gist my people. lol


Till I come yah way again

But for now it is bye –bye

20 comments:

  1. What kind of stupid slap is that Vera! And you were still on yours knees receiving slaps? Omo! I womt waut till the end of the service o, i have gone since.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Replies
    1. Mama Nnuku you have killed me with laughter. See me laughing out loud in Public. I guess she saw you packing and it's her own way to punish as a visitor packing like wonbiriki wonbia. Pele okanjua Ko da rara.

      Delete
  3. Eeeyah,sorry oo,enjoy the food,hehehehe,experienced something similar years back, it was even my mom that forced me to go with her,after a lot of begging and cajoling,i said I didn't want to go to white garment church,seeing that she wasn't happy,i sha decided to go with her just that once oo,hmm when the prayer started they brought broom and palm fonds from no where begin dey flog me ehn,i cried started shouting mummy, the harder I cried the harder they beat me,my mom just troway face like she didn't know me,after the yeye beating with several red marks and wounds on my fair skin,they now poured a big perfume on my body which is d same as pouring iodine on fresh wound I screamed and jumped and started dancing "kolomental" they started praying and shouting that it's the spirit at work oo,meanwhile na shock of the pains made me act like that,afterwards my mom begged and pet me, was so mad at her,but what to do she's my mother,love her dearly.cant forget that experince,never

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hahhahahaha😁😁😁😁😁😁
      It must be all this celestial church

      Delete
    2. Lol. Celestial or sabath

      Delete
    3. Jesu. What deliverance is that, I can't just attend any white garment church. I was at one C & S for wedding last December, I to stay outside I can't just imagine pulling off my shoes for hours.

      Delete
  4. Hehehehe....Mama Nnuku, nothing is free o, even in Freetown. You don chop igbati oloyiii cos of food.

    ReplyDelete
  5. Hahahhahahahah
    Mama nnuku ateno 😁😁😁😁😁😁😁
    Thank God you weren't slap for nothing
    The food you packed is your consolation
    All these cherubim and celestial churches them

    ReplyDelete
  6. 😂 I am sure is one of this "assignment" churches you went to.

    ReplyDelete
  7. I don't get it.. u knelt down there and u were being slapped and u still knelt down and continue receiving d slaps.. as in dis ur gist get as e be o

    ReplyDelete
  8. Hahahhahahahah
    Mama nnuku ateno 😁😁😁😁😁😁😁
    Thank God you weren't slap for nothing
    The food you packed is your consolation
    All these cherubim and celestial churches them

    ReplyDelete
  9. All these white garment church, and that is how one was beating me with their red cloth when I was pregnant claiming I was possessed, me jor kuku stand up and told my friend am not comfortable.

    ReplyDelete
  10. Hehehehehehehehe.mama NNuku dooh..awoof dey run bele..lol

    ReplyDelete
  11. Free food
    Free slap
    Awoof dey purge belly
    Sorry for the free slap,hope the rice sweet

    ReplyDelete
  12. Epele ooo but you should have left when you have collected the food. Sorry for the slap.

    ReplyDelete
  13. Hahaha if I hear say I gree collect the slap taah

    ReplyDelete
  14. Free slap equates free food...

    ReplyDelete

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