Stella Dimoko Chronicle Of Blog Visitor Narrative...


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Sunday, September 30, 2018

Chronicle Of Blog Visitor Narrative...

Na wah


Good day Stella and BVs. 

I woke up with tears. Please kindly post this on IHN, I need closure on this issue. I am weak from crying and my heart hurts.

Its been 15 years since our baby of the house was taken away from us.

Some years back my mum was contacted by one big woman through one of our neighbour( who turned family friend) to help the big woman babysit two babies( she adopted a boy and a girl)till she returns from Libya. The negotiations were made, she was supposed to be paying my mum 10k every month and my mum moved to her house to take care of the twins.

Mum left us to go live there. We needed the money badly. Mum has been a hardworking woman since I've known her. She was not opportune to go to secondary school. She stopped in Primary 2, cos of early marriage which crashed later and she remarried to my dad. So I grew up to see her suffer. Sometimes she'll hawk puff puff, sachet water or sell eggs just to take care of the family. We joined her at a very tender age. She was a real hustler and I give it up for her.

So that babysitting job was like Christmas for us. She joyfully accepted without thinking twice. She moved to the woman's house, the few months(2 months) the woman was still in Nigeria was enjoyable for everyone who lived in the house, my mum was paid those two months salary and fed well, until she( the big woman) travelled back to Libya everything changed. My mum had to carry the twins to our house. No more salary and we could not reach the woman on phone. That was one of the most devastating period in my family's life. I could remember how we fed from hand to mouth. That was when I and my sibling started hawking water, sometimes my mum will make Puff Puff and we'll also hawk that one.

 We use the money to buy garri or something to eat. Sometimes my mum will go to bushes and look for leaves and make something and we'll all eat..(we were two girls, 12 and 10 years, and a boy 5 years respectively) the experience was not palatable but thank God that things have changed for us now. That is not the main issue.

Meanwhile it was getting to 2 years and we were yet to hear from the woman. My mum was left to train this children. Did i forget to write that they were premature and the girl(one of the babies) eventually died because according to doctors, the birth mother had taken a lot of contraceptives to flush out the baby while in her womb but the baby didn't die then.

 The baby had some marks, discolourations, and green veins on her head, whenever we carry them to church peopl will just be looking disgustingly at her...she couldn't sit straight even when she was a year old when the other baby is already walking. Like something affected her spinal cord. But my mum loves her anyway. We loved this children like they were our siblings, to the point that neighbours started thinking they were my mum's children.

Unfortunately the baby girl died and the boy was remaining. He grew up to be a very fine boy. And he loved my mum as though she was his real mum. I remember my mum always reminding him that she is not his real mother and that his real mother is in America and will buy a car for her when she returns. We kept telling him that cos he would return from sch and start throwing tantrums ( that he noticed my brother's name on his report card is different from his, he will be so furious) so we made it a point of duty to always explain to him that my mum and we are not his real parents. But I think he didn't just get it then cos he was still very young.

About when he was 5 years old,his mother returned and forcefully took the boy away from us. I could remember how her ran inside and hid under the bed screaming, 'mummy, mummy, don't let them take me away..mummy pls save me' I remember how my mum was standing helplessly,crying and explaining to him that the woman is his real mother and that we will be coming to see him. That was how he was dragged into the car with the help of that my mum's so called friend who hooked my mum up with the job. The woman just betrayed us like that. I was expecting that at least they notify us before coming for the boy but they came like a thief in the night.

My mum and us are not allowed anywhere near the house. And when my(naive) mum went to her so called friend's house to complain to her about how she was treated badly by the abroad woman, the woman ( my mum's friend who now owns a big orphanage home will tell her to forget about the boy or else she wants the woman to deal with her knowing that she's a strong woman). I remember my mum crying every night about the boy.

The last time my mum went there to her friend's place, she gave her 50 thousand naira as payoff taking care of the children and told her to forget the case that she is no match to the woman to even think of reporting the matter to any authority.

What is 50 thousand naira compared to the emotional trauma we are going through till date. All these happenings is been a long time but I still feel the pain. As I am typing this , tears are running down my cheek. My mother's own is worst, she cries almost everyday for the past years. She told us about an incident when she met face to face with the boy and his mother, the boy removed his sweat shirt that h got fro him from overseas and put on my mum and whispered to her' mummy I want to follow u back home' that u need to see the way the woman shouted on the boy eh. They used my mum not considering the trauma she will go through.

Now BVs I am not myself again whenever I think of that boy. I wish they can allow us to get contact with him. I wish the they didn't take him away like that, I just want to let him know that we didn't sell him( heard he's always crying asking of his mother), I just wish they can allow us see him , I wish I can hug him,I wish I can take the pains away because I'm sure he is going tru more emotional trauma than we are going tru now. I heard that he has tried escaping so many times. And the latest now is that she sent him to the east to live with some people who use him as a slave( my instinct tells me that she sent him that far cos she's afraid he'll run back to us). My mum said she bumped into her ( the big woman)at the market few weeks back and asked her about the boy and she told her he's now living in the east.

Why are people so wicked? I woke up with him in my thoughts cos I had a bad dream that he is really suffering where he is. He even asked me to take him with me. My eyes are swollen from crying.I don't know what to do.

I have a strong urge to take up the case up legally. I just want the court to make her allow us have contact with the boy even if its his phone number. I will soon be working and I really want this trauma to end. I know the boy is legally her child but to forcefully remove him from us is not fair.
We are attached to each other and they would have allowed us contact with him if they are good people.

I didn't even mention the occasions my mum will pass her friend's /neighbour's place ( the one who is always telling my mum not to fight back and the same one who connected her with the babysitting job in the first place) and see the big woman offloading bags of rice, beans,yams and cartons of goodies into her house and when she sees my mother she'll be startled. ( this was happening that time the woman returned from Libya). I learnt not to trust too easily from that. They used my mum and dumped her. I feel God will handle that one . My main issue now is for us to have contact with our little boy. Even though he is not our biological brother we still miss him cos he became a part of us, we grew fond of each other and its only fair that only fair that we are allowed to make contact with him.

BVs and Stella pls I need your advice in how to about this issue. Our life has not been the same after these experience.

'You have no right to claim that boy as your brother..there were no documents signed and like you said,your mum was used and that's it.
Legally you do not have a case.....

The Boy will look for you people when he is of age i believe......
And why did your mum think the lady with Orphanage is her friend or was her friend?there is a difference between friendship and acquaintance...
The only thing your mum can fight for is her salaries that she didnt get but that might even be hard unless there is a signed agreement to that effect....


  1. na waa.i shed a few tears while reading this.the boy will come when he grows up. take heart

    1. he was snatched at 5yrs and its been 15yrs, i think at 20yrs he's free to choose who he wants to live with

    2. As in I was just thinking the same thing maybe she meant to write 5 years not 15. 20 year old can do what he wants and he is not a boy. And I’m so shocked after 15years you people are still this attached. Please find a way to move on. I don’t know what my the madam didn’t just pay your mum. Na wa

    3. I was really moved by this story, wish I knew anything about the law, there must be a loophole somewhere and it takes a great lawyer to find that. I am certain the boy will somehow find you guys when he is empowered enough. However, I learned something new, anyone in such a situation should at least get an affidavit to back themselves. If your mum got this long time ago to show the mum dumped the kid with her, this would have been a different story. It is well with you Hun, must be so sad, the way I get so attached to kids, I would have fainted if it were me..sigh!

  2. Forget about the boy and let them be, take it as if he is dead. I pray he reconnects with your family someday.

  3. Please free your mind from that boy for now, he will surely look for you people once he's old enough. But I'm very sure that woman is not their biological mother as well, you mean she did not even asked of the girl when she came back? How can a mother abandon her twins with someone she doesn't know and later come back and met only one of them? I'm not understanding jare

    *Larry was here*

  4. Pray for him to be safe, that's all u can do. This is Nigeria. No court will award u custody of d boy when his mom is alive and ready to claim him or do u have legal docs saying u adopted Him? Just pray for him to be safe anywhere he is. Or u can look for him.

  5. I smell baby racketeering here; "orphanage", "adoption" with these women with this kind of characters?
    If Nigeria has private investigators,
    those are the people to contact to permeate the "orphanage" and find out what they use kids for.
    The one "in the east" fit don get used for Jazzzzzzzzzz!
    Private investigators with human right lawyers will help here.

    1. Thank you for airing my thoughts. The big woman and the poster's mother's friend are child traffickers.

  6. is well.

    Dear poster please take it easy on yourself, like Stella said, the boy will look for you when he is of age.

  7. Poster leave the boy alone and face front...let your mother ask for the two years that she wasn't paid.

    Socialmediaawardsng to vote @stelladimokokorkus as BLOGGER OF THE YEAR text sma18 stella to 33352

  8. Shuooooooooooooo!
    You sure say no be baby farm those women dey run?

  9. I really do feel your pain,but the truth remains that he is not your brother,neither did your mum adopt him legally.Let him go,when the time is right,he will come looking for you people.Anonymous 007!

  10. So sorry for what you guys are going through but the child belongs with his biological mum. You have to let it go.

  11. Poster i will advice you and your family leave the rich woman and her backstabbing friend to God. There are some battle that's not worth fighting and believe me this is one of such battles. If the boy grows up and look for you guys fine,if he doesn't let the sleeping dog.....

  12. I don't think anything can be done about the matter, you guys should let go.

    Socialmediaawardsng to vote @stelladimokokorkus as BLOGGER OF THE YEAR text sma18 stella to 33352

  13. It’s well poster..the boy might look for u guys when he is of age

  14. You guys should just let go of the boy, may be he will reconnect with you later in future.

  15. Her Green Pastures30 September 2018 at 16:21

    Poster, my instincts don't lie. I believe you have a case. I feel this strongly.

    Has your mother been appropriately paid for her time with these children?
    I saw 50k there, let me pretend I did not see that rubbish and ask you again.
    Again, my instincts don't lie, something tells me that boy and his sister don't belong to her.
    Only a DNA test will confirm this though.
    And you will need a lawyer.
    God will not come down and do anything for you. The reason he gave you a brain is so that you will use it. It is not a lampholder occupying space in your head.
    I need to say this because it is very obvious that many Nigerians have no clue what their brains are for.
    'Leefitforgord', the lazy, clueless, mentally slothfull,cowardly, visionless, easily subjugated Nigerian's favourite phrase.

    He said HE will BLESS the WORKS of YOUR HANDS.
    What is HE gonna bless when you are lazily balancing on your buttocks already defeated whining 'leefitfogord'???

    Make a step.
    Decide which angle you wish to address this. The woman has used your fear, poverty and illiteracy to subjugate you.

    Defeat her with the truth.

    PS: The boy has probably been sent to the east to work as houseboy.
    The boy cannot be returned to you.
    He does not belong to you. Most likely he does not belong to that woman.
    The best that will happen is that you will establish contact with this boy as family friends and an emotional support system,your remuneration appropriately paid and one more baby selling ring destroyed.

  16. You guys need to get that boy off your head, allow things be for now, your family is not rich like that other woman so how do you intend to fight that woman? I feel you should try and disconnect the feelings you have for the boy for now, someday he will come around. If you can trace him to the east, do that and connect with him in a hidden way.

  17. You all will get over the pain. if the boy isn't brainwashed in future he will look for you people, by them his mother won't have any hold on him. I understand that kinda attachment cos my mum has taken care of a baby like that for someone,and they later took the child to the abroad but not in this manner. Things happen & you just have to let go & move on

  18. Stella is wrong on this one and I say that with due respect cause I really believe she's advising you in good faith. She's just wrong. Under the law, this person is now an adult .in fact even if he was still a kid, what the mother did is abandonment and your mother could have taken her to fight for custody when the woman returned. In fact if we go back a bit, after it became clear the woman had abandoned the kids, your mother should have taken them to the police. This could have very badly if the woman came back and accused your mum of stealing the children. Don't just take kids into your house like that. Back to now though, the only thing the woman can do is hide the location of her son or tell you guys not to see him. Under the law, she cant stop you from trying to find him as he's now grown. There's no law that prevents you from seeking him out .now it's up to you. Check Facebook,ask people that can help .In fact maybe you sent in this chronicle with all the details because you're hoping he may read and contact you.

    1. Stella is not wrong in my opinion, there is a difference between legal obligation and moral obligation. They had an agreement(contract) to look after the kids with a fixed salary which in this case is the (consideration) however @ some point the employer stopped upholding her part of the agreement, which the employed woman had a right to enforce, she should have sought for an order compelling her to pay her, or pay her damages for her stress or whatever. But she did not do that, the fact that she continued to care for the kids, she did it out of morality. So now that the contract has been terminated, she was paid of 50k, ahe does not have the right to claim custody of that child, how??
      A simple scenario is when u employ a maid in ur house, and after taking care of ur kids for some years, for some reason she has to leave your house, then because she has formed a bond with your kids, she’d now claim she has to go with them. It does not work that way.
      Poster the only thing your mom has a right to do is to contest that 50k they paid to her, she should take her to the authorities and report. And prove of course with receipts watever she spent and the amount she is demanding from the woman.
      However, personally, i’d advise you guys to move on. This “big woman” can go to any length to kp ur mom out of the way, if she keeps digging about the boy. Remember this is Nigeria, most probably the police in ir area are on her payroll. U can act as if u r no longer interested in the boy, tell ur mom to stop asking after him and she shud stop going to the womn’s house, meanwhile underground you do ur investigations till you dig out the truth. And don’t forget to PRAY PRAY PRAY, cos dis is a dangerous journey u r abt to embark on. Gudluck!

    2. @tee, you understand a little about the law but not enough. The agreement was to be a maid in her house. That agreement was broken when the mother left. But that's a small issue compared to the fact that she abandoned her children. There was never an agreement that the new lady would care for the children in her absence. That means she simply abandoned rhem. But none of that really matters because now the child is an adult. She can reach out to him to see if he's interested in a relationship with them. That's all she wants anyway the 50k or no 50kk is moot

  19. This is where lack of info becomes detrimental. An average human being is a terrible user and they just took advantage of your mum who in her state believed the madam would settle her well on her return. She should have taken those children to the police immediately. She would have saved you all this emotional trauma and the cost of caring for the boy over the years. Difficult as it may be you need to close that chapter and commit the boy to God who sees where your eyes cannot reach. It is well!

    1. Not just average most people are users back to the story. I understand how you all are doing but there's little you people can do about it. Commit the boy to the hands of God, pray for him. I believe when his old enough he will look and reach out to you to guys. All the best

  20. I understand your pain. It's normal. The woman shouldn't have taken him away like that if she has good plans for him but that's in the past . What you can do now is to always remember him in your prayers and when you have enough cash, try to hire a private investigator to find out where he his and if he is doing well. You can also check social media using his name. I pray he is doing fine. Don't let this weigh you and your mom down too much. When you think of him, just say a word of prayer for him . It is well with you all.
    Please let's try and vote for our Stella o. We all know she deserves it. All shoki winners try and vote for her o .It's just #50 naira . You can vote as many times as you like .
    To vote @stelladimokokorkus as BLOGGER OF THE YEAR text sma18 stella to 33352.
    If she wins ,it's a victory for not just her but us bvs as well

  21. Pray for the boy always,for God to take care of all will reunite one day when the boy grows up.Dont worry the God of justice will fight for u n your family.take it easy.its going to be alright in d end.

  22. Most Lybian returnees have lost their mental acuity and moral compass. Wetin their eyes carry see on the journey, eh, mouth no fit talk. So, you may be looking at a human being but inside of them, is the heart of a beast. Otherwise, why would the oga-madam be so heartless? Plus, if you look deeper these women are bound by jazz/underground and nefarious bonds; child or human trafficking for some type of quick gains isn't far behind these undesirable elements. Yepa

    1. She probably wasn't heartless. She probably was afraid that if she tried to ask for the children the new mother might refuse or put up resistance or beg for more time or run away. So she did what many people do. She surprised her and took the child and it worked

  23. You have a good case for your salary, a very strong one. And for the boy if you take his case to court she can go to jail for criminal negligence. The problem you have is that your mother collected 50k from her and took time before reporting the case.

  24. Something like this happened{A different scenerio} to my cousins whose mother was brutally murdered due to the conflict her husband had with his fellow kinsmen.My cousins were very little as at when this happened.Since their dad is from another tribe,he took them away from us.To our surprise,25 years later during the burial of our grandfather,my two long lost and forgotten cousins appeared.We never believed we would ever see them again, but they were back to us for good.
    Please, do yourselves some good,relieve yourselves the stress of worrying and fighting over him.Pray for him. He'll return to you sooner than you expect.


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