In 2013 Ese called out Pastor Biodun Fatoyinbo of COZA church and accused him of assault,the matter was so controversial and viral that the Pastor promised to get back with a robust response but never did.
Someone messaged me that Ese is a very troubled woman but i disagree because the person meant the Yaba left kind of troubled...I just think she didnt find healing from what troubled her before she rushed into Marriage......I pray God heals her pain and helps her find direction....
This lady is fighting too many demons. God, if truly something went down between her and PB, please fight for her and don't make PB and others think she's suffering from karma for "lying" against a man of God.
ReplyDeleteAnonymous u know this! I feel for her... Especially in a country where blind followers keep chanting "touch not my anointed blablabla".... God will definitely fight for her.
DeleteSome ladies are being abused by their pastors on the daily but rara o they can't voice out because of what world pple will say.
She's a deeply troubled woman. I pray she finds peace. I read through her post and didn't get a hang of it. It is well with you Ese.
DeleteShe needs to totally forgive herself and forget the past. The past came playing out on the marriage and she was very CONSCIOUS of her past while building her marital home, so it's like trying hard to always prove she isn't what the devil set out for.hence, she stopped living for her and began to live for others.
DeleteEse, I understand you superwoman, let the Holyspirit love you mold you and build you
You are not a failure Ese,. Pastor Biodun I know you read this blog ., Call this lady and apologize to her .it will go a long way
The real superwoman. Ese.
DeleteMay you find healing and peace.
#hadeyhalaba
@Call this lady and apologize to her .it will go a long way. She will want a public apology oh.
DeleteEveryone who know that pastor Biodun knows Ese wasn't lying. It will count against him if he lets her go to hell cos he messed her up and played mum.
DeleteI pray she finds divine healing. Healing that'll brings peace of mind and happiness
ReplyDeleteThis woman and scandal shaaa
DeleteShe will be alright. All she need is more time to heal completely.
ReplyDeleteStory teller.
ReplyDeleteI have to give it to this lady... Shes very honest & open about her feelings, & not scared of condemnation from the public eye, taking responsibility for her past mistakes!
ReplyDeleteThat being said, she'd most likely join the marching band chanting "Marriage is overated"... she ignorantly jumped at the 1st request presented to her after the saga with that yahoo Gucci pastor, possibly with a subconscious thought of it filling that void & covering her shame, well it doesnt work that way, you went into the union for the wrong reasons, hence the underlying unhappiness still "cropped" up to the surface. I just feel bad for the husband that stood beaide you despite your sexcapade & public bashing!
Exactly Oxygen. You said it as it is.
Deleteone of the very few BVs i take seriously....u said it all
DeleteFor the first oxygen you make sense to me without your roman Japan quotes...
DeleteOxygen, i always look forward to reading your comments because na so so laff I go laff. This your comment get plenty sense, you talk wella and I give it to you nne.
DeleteIf you actually went through this ordeal, I recommend you read these books: beauty for ashes, battle field of the mind, the lady, her lover and her Lord. The first two by Joyce Meyer and the last TD Jakes.
DeleteI pray God's mercy, healing and strength upon you in Jesus name.
I believe that you would be reunited with your husband and this time you will enjoy every bit of it.
Stay blessed.
I think Ese needs to speak to a therapist. I won't say I understand what she is going through but it feels there's a serious burden she needs to let go off.
ReplyDeleteShe sounds like she still likes her husband but needs space. Like she felt choked by his presence. Thats deep
Honestly, a large percentage of married women can relate to her plight... but dont have the balls to take that bold step, one reason or the other!
DeleteA wise Russian business partner said to me "Divorce isnt such a tragedy, the tragedy is staying in an unhappy marriage... nobody ever died of divorce, but ppl die from remaining in a failed marriage keeping up appearances".... he was so right!!
So true @oxygen
DeleteLOL @ oxygen, what imaginary Russian business partner? FOH, mami!
DeleteI've been married for 5years and i wish i can break free, oxygen is right
DeleteBeen married 15 years. Have to break free. My hubby is addicted to pussy. Keeps low level girlfriends. Has now fathered a child with one. I’m done. I need my happiness. All those saying for the children, what good am I u happy to my 3 kids????
DeleteHia!
ReplyDeleteEse ozokwa?
Stella please explain the "Yaba Left kind of Troubled"
I am lost...lol
Asin she get skion skion,understood?
DeleteI just found out my new BF has skoin skoin too, i think his own is seasonal, cus i noticed it in rainy season.... make i see how harmattan own go de. If no change then i waka.
Delete09:29 you want to wait for harmattan before you pick race? Start running now o cos waiting longer might be dangerous lol
DeleteStella she is not troubled. I can relate with every thing she wrote up there. Yes there are times you get tired of the marriage thing.
ReplyDeleteReally, you get tired? It happens when you are newly married and living with your whole village then you lose the companionship cos everyday you have one million mouths to feed and work to do and kids to take care of. I always tell people to live with just their spouse for sometime, that way you build up the friendship and togetherness.
DeleteI am not bringing anyone to live with us till we have the second child.
Yes oh, recently, I got tired of my husband and I moved into the children's room. It's so much fun with the children and I sleep better. Sex has reduced and DH understands perfectly well. So now, we talk more and spend quality time together. More like, trying to woo me afresh. Not the one that I will be peacefully sleeping and once he's having difficulty sleeping after watching TV till late at night, he'll interrupt my sleep foe sex every night. As if I'm a sleeping pill. And once I'm awake, I won't be able to sleep again till day break. Ruining the whole day for me and making me very unproductive.
DeleteRight now, I'm loving it. Rather than fuck fuck, let him think about making money. Abeg
Anon 10:19,this is my life. Married last year with three brothers staying with us. I have lost it all because the affection is now zero. Pregnancy followed immediately and since then, no intimacy till now. I don't even want him to touch me again. I'm 100% ready to leave buy
DeleteMy family is saying that I'm not okay. Nobody seems to understand me. I need space and my time. I can't be living in my husband's house like I'm living in a family house. I detest my husband now. All I want is SEPARATION. And the nonsense man is asking me why I'm bothered staying with his siblings since they are not disturbing me. I work, I don't have a nanny nor help and you expect me to be cooking for your whole village and be attending to baby too. I need my sanity please
Anon 13:03, don't come with chronicles when you find out that another woman is filling the void you created o.
DeleteMarriage is too in-your-face sometimes, especially if you are the type of person that likes your space but after a while I stopped seeing it as me and my husband, I started seeing it as us. In the first year we were living in a one bedroom apartment so there was no where to seclude myself. The man was always in my face so we became very close. He is like a part of me now and I can't run away from myself . Sometimes the best times I have with my hubby is when there is power outage and we are too lazy to put on the generator, we just sit in the darkness and gist for hours, far into the night sef. I won't trade moments like that for anything.
I also always say that I will be happily married or not married at all. If she is not happy in her marriage it's better to get out of it, feeling lonely even when you have a partner is the worst kind of loneliness.
Ese needs help though, she hasn't healed.
Ese needs help and time to heal
ReplyDeleteMay God heal her and Grant her peace
Pastor Biodun fatoyinbo is still preparing a robust response
preparing wetin?
DeletePerson wey don loacate the next victim
She needs a therapist. Nigeria is a messed up country.
DeleteIt is well with her.
ReplyDeleteIt is a pity. She was not prepared for this marriage but had to do it so as to get things off her mind.
ReplyDeleteIt is well with her and the husband. I pray they both find closure
How many Nigerian women are prepared and well grounded for marriage kwanu? Odiegwu. The lady is just a troubled soul
DeleteEse needs psycological help. Something is broken inside. Poor girl 💔💔
ReplyDeleteShe is still obsessed with pastor Biodun. She can't get him off her head. You need healing Ese. My thoughts.
ReplyDeleteSelah
Rubbish thoughts!!!
DeleteAbeg who is Pastor Biodun, is he god? someone used his place of authority to take advantage of a young girl and you say this. She probably wasn't whole before the incident, but the thing broke her the more.
DeleteGbam @bed and roses
DeleteI wish her peace. Not easy breaking up with someone unsure of his powers and moving on with life.
ReplyDeleteNever date a "pastor"
I saw this coming
ReplyDeleteI like the fact that she is open with her feelings....some eomen feel this way,but dare nit speak out for fear of condemnation.....they will soon land here and tongue lash Ese just to make themselves feel good...
ReplyDeleteA lot of women feel this way but choose to figure out a win win solution. Nobody says in marriage, both parties will be lovey duvy every day. No! But it's a commitment to always be together. Sometimes, when I feel my husband is annoying for no reason oh, I tell him my hormones are on fire so please for now, don't overstep boundaries. He will ensure everything that makes me feel in bandage, I stop doing them. He takes over and allows me enjoy the moment of being single which I crave for. Even if it means me going to the movies alone, sleep alone, just be me. Then when I begin to feel like being a responsible parent and catering for him too, he allows me. Without being judgemental.
DeleteIt's not easy to wake up one day and realize you are someone different.
If you feel like traveling, go. After a while, the feeling of caring for your loved ones will comeback.
She needs help... It is well with her
ReplyDeleteShe us troubled. She does need help
ReplyDeleteI knew it would happen soonest.
ReplyDeleteSome of her posts screams “troubled soul”
Get help dear.
“Scream
ReplyDeleteWe might not understand what she's going through,I pray she finds peace
ReplyDeleteEeyah
ReplyDeleteMental illness comes in several forms. She’s troubled. I knew this would happen. Sad.
ReplyDeletelooking at her pics before reading Stella's comment,I already concluded that she was controversial...see as she put hand for waist like woman wey wan go drag person for money
ReplyDeleteStory! She gats move, there is no money again. I don't have any atom of pity for her.
ReplyDeleteWhere was the money before? It’s her father’s money in that marriage. Anyway Benny has been married like two or three tines. Then he met another wrong match.
DeleteTroubled for where?? She just voiced out what most married people, both male and female go through in marriage. You think it's easy living with someone you called your partner? I certainly have times that I just wanna be left alone, mood swings and all, and hubby understands and there are times that he complains that I'm not talking , that's because I'm tired, it's just boring doing the same routine, we all need space , why would someone want to choke me with love in the first place? It's tiring abeg . I understand what she's saying and if that's what will give her peace of mind ,continue abeg. Who doesn't miss their singlehood? Now the kids are involved and everything has changed, and your hubby would expect certain expectations from you, they wan kill you?
ReplyDeleteI think she's super intelligent and well grounded in her self.
ReplyDeleteShe's not afraid to say things as they are, something very few Nigerians can understand or relate to as we live in abject fear, ignorance and denigration especially as women.
She would have flourished in saner societies.
I follow her on FB.
Please don't come with that 'Welcome Ese' rubbish, please it's too late in the year for such idiocy. Please.
Coza don use this girl destiny
DeleteMental illness is not when a person runs in the street carrying baskets with dirt and wearing rags. Yes she is speaking her truth but for me i see a troubled soul, she needs deep counselling, she needs to be in therapy,she needs healing, she needs closure from something that seems stronger than her. If you read between her posts you will see her words are deep and it's a sign something is not just okay. I don't even know what she needs to fill that void but my prayer is that she finds healing and gets to experience real peace. But do i think all is well absolutely not. No one writes like this and is happy. Ese is not okay and needs help. My take though.
ReplyDelete✅✅
DeleteClear cut demonic activity!
ReplyDeleteShe said she has stopped believing in God. This is a manifestation of having no hope in this world.
See needs the word of God, she needs to return to God.
NB: the whole of Israel saw that Moses took an Ethiopian bride, but only those who disgraced Moses were punished! Touch not (with your mouth, pen, keypad, thoughts) the anointed and do the prophet NO harm.
There is no criteria to hurt the anointed, none at all. Is it fair?, well na so God want am, our job is to fall in line!
Let wisdom control all of us, amen.
We definitely won’t touch God’s annointed but tell your Gucci flaunting vain egotistical swagged up midlife crisis stricken god of man to stop sticking his dick in holes that don’t belong to his wife. His gist full ground.
DeleteYou are a fool Anon 11:08. Who annointed Biodun? Even if he were, he fell short of God's glory and was called out. His pride wouldn't let him own up and change.
DeleteAbeg anonymous 11:08 shift with you Bible thumping opinion. Do you have any evidence of his being a man of God?
DeleteAre you comparing Moses to that your pastor biodun, really? Moses was from what the Bible portrays a true servant of God
DeleteI understand what she is going through. I need to leave this marriage cos am not happy. Been married for 7 years now, no kid. Hubby values his family more than me. He always say I can't come between him and his family. So many times they have hurt me with their words and behavior but he never seese anything wrong in that.I can't speak up cos if I did he sees me as a pretender and would ask why I did not voice out my feelings to his family. That why would I tell him. I can't gossip in peace with him without him insulting and calling me a pretender. How can one not gist with one's hubby as a friend? My mil has never asked him why we have issues having a kid, but she will harrass me, drag me to church and native places. Hubby has low sperm count, I have pcos and am hoping to get treatment soon. But I realized it's not even about the kid. Am not happy. Got married at 24 straight out of university and thought that's how life is up posed to me. How wrong! I hate myself most times, depressed. Sometimes when hubby verbally abuses me, I wake up at night and feel like doing the unthinkable to him.I feel like a second class citizen. He always feels he know everything and I know nothing. He is kind most times to me and my family and most people outside see him as a sweet guy but I live with him and know better. I just need to stable myself financially and I will move. Very soon I will be free of all these.I have lost my true self to this marriage.
ReplyDeleteThis comment has been removed by the author.
DeleteHi.
Deletei HOPE you find peace and find it real soon.
This was my exact story until I got out of the marriage.
Married at 24 to a terrible human being that teh whole world thought was the best thing that ever happened to me.
Only me knew what I was going throwing. You cant gist with them. I could not even walk, talk, sleep, eat correctly, there was just always something to correct.
I got out when it got too much but I advice that you seek seek God and counsel with professionals. Also Know that the fact that you have made an error of judgement does not mean your life should end.
Take your life in your hands and determine your happiness until you do that these guys will simply be happy seeing you depressed.
Please can you leave, it means you are around 31 years old. You are still young. This man has no love or respect for you. You will find a man who would love and respect you with better sperm count. Leave him to marry his mother, when you start getting involved in the occult it derails your life completely. When you move out, dress up, show up, believe in your self and stay humble, make you see life change.
DeleteOh dear...
ReplyDeleteInitially when she announced she was getting married I was like how did she quickly get over the Fatoyinbo saga? I was so happy for her but now here we are...
She never healed!
Dear Ese, if you are reading this I pray you find healing and the peace you so much desire.
This lady sha! has issues,underlying issues she needs to sort out,so she can breathe...You and boobdaddy were friends before marriage came to scatter it? Lies,Misconception and fundamental deceit. Look any one who isnt ready for COMMITMENT shouldnt,I repeat shouldnt ever consider marriage.Selfish lots have all the wrong reasons why their marriage wouldnt work.When you marry for the wrong reasons,ish'gets birthed.
ReplyDeletei actually like her and her honesty. Not many people are bold enough to live in their truth unapologetically.
ReplyDeleteMany of us married cope better in long distance marriages, where you dont have to live daily with a spouse, others cope better without inlaws/third parties around, others cope better with their spouse under the same roof.
She likes her space and she is living her life on her terms and most importantly, she IS happy. Marriage isnt for everyone - it doesnt mean marriage is bad but its okay to recognise that you may perhaps thrive better and healthier alone than stringing along someone else's child/another human/spouse and thereby frustrating their existence on earth.
Ese i am proud of you. I am very sure there are lots of couples who envy you but because of keeping up appearances, worrying about what world people would say they cling onto their marriages, perhaps because thats the only thing they believe, they are successful at.
Nothing is wrong with her, she's living her truth. She's human so its natural for her to make mistakes or feel some type of way, we all have our own problems,we all have weaknesses. People are quick to criticise others cause is not their area of weakness. As a single lady I understand her perfectly well.
ReplyDeleteeven if a pastor slept with you? please move on na. the pastor dey enjoy him life.
ReplyDeleteI hope she won't run from her child someday too because there was a post she made sometime ago or how she feels about the son sometimes.
ReplyDeleteI'm scared of getting married i'm 28,i love my boyfriend but rejected his proposal,do not think i'm mentally fit for this thing they call marriage.I miss my late sister.
ReplyDeleteIt is not compulsory you get married. Please stay single until you are emotionally and mentally matured for it. Marriage is not "this thing".
DeleteBaby you’ll do just fine. Take that step. May your sister rest peacefully in the bosom of our Lord.
DeleteMarriage is not what you enter with let me try? If that is your mentality as you are walking through the door you will beclimbing out the window.
DeleteThere is no crime in staying single if that is your choice.
Better that you are single and happy than married and completely miserable.
Marriage is a beautiful thing but only with the right person.
I don't think she is troubled in the least she just lives her life as an open book and many of us are not used to such brutal honesty. Many marriages are going through separations and divorces and the people involved are unknown. Benny strikes me as a honourable man and will make a great husband to someone else. Ese should live her truth whatever it is.
ReplyDeleteThink about it, living her life as an open book is a form of therapy for her.
DeleteSending love and light to you Ese, please nurture the friendship you have with your ex. Not wanting to be around people can be a symptom of Depression, do not push people away........I wish you the best. And to everyone chanting yabaleft, mental illness, disturbed, troubled.........kindly put on a toga of empathy. What does it benefit you to talk down on someone who is troubled???
ReplyDeleteEse is not disturbed. She's a lesbian/bisexual. She'll come out of the closet soon.
ReplyDeleteSave this comment for when it happens.
She is disturbed. It’s no news that she’s a bisexual. Her university mates keep on saying it.
Delete