Stella Dimoko Korkus.com: Sunday In House Gists - Marrying A Widow/Widower...

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Sunday, December 16, 2018

Sunday In House Gists - Marrying A Widow/Widower...

Who is on this table?About to or already Married to someone who lost their partner?







Some are still in love with the departed one and all they do is compare who you are with who they were?

There are so many stories with a situation like this..
Some turn out good and some head South...

Lets hear your story!

98 comments:

  1. Replies
    1. I'm madly in love with one, she is my Addiction, My Weakness, My strength...

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    2. I can marry a widower but ehhhhh what actually killed your wife???? I will be curious to know

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    3. Lilly olodo a widower is a man not a woman

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    4. Anon 18:42,seriously. You actually felt she should be corrected. You are the olodo plus oya!

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    5. Anon 18:42 don't U think U re the olodo here?! I believe Lilly is a woman, read her comment again & see the sense init

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    6. This one swore that today must not end without him or her correcting somebody's grammar.

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    7. All the anno
      Fighting for me 1 beer 😘😘😘😘😘😘😘

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  2. I'm married to one. Live in Canada. They were already divorced for years before she died. So there's no comparison of any sort. He takes me as I am and I take him as he is. The only problem is his daughter wanted him to stay single for life so she's not happy he remarried. Mind you my hubby is 52. I'm 40. So cos of that she doesn't visit nor come close to us. I've tried reaching out severally but she doesn't respond. So I just said to your tent oh Isreal. Las Las she'll be fine. My hubby is the happiest at the moment so that's what matters to me..

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    Replies
    1. She will surely be fine las las. So she would have been playing the role of wify for her dad or the poor man would have been all alone till death. Yeye shild

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    2. See wahala. She's on her own ahbeg.

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    3. She is selfish. My advice to widows and widowers is that they should try and find love again. I wish my Dad took this advice when mum died 12 years ago. Now it’s too late and we all have our own families.

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    4. She will come around later. When my dad died, I hated all the useless men that were flocking around my mum. Infact, I hated my mum for entertaining them to the point that I threatened to chase one with cutlass if he stepped his foot into our house. They will come to my dad's sacred sitting room and be smiling sheepishly asking us foolish questions. I was a teenager.
      Now that I am married, I wish she remarried. At least, now she will have a partner to keep her company. She is so lonely and always disturbing somebody.

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    5. Mine was with a sad ending. I live in the UK, he came chasing for 6 months before I agree, helped with getting his 4 children to school in the UK shortly after he started dramas. He replaced our wedding photo on the wall to that of late wife, his daughter became a monster, told me her dad married me to enable them come to school in the UK. He will leave home for God knows where and return with juju pot/s. Finally, I ran for dear life 13 years ago. Enjoying single life with my children and grandchildren. Looking forward to my 70th birthday in 2020. MINE WAS A WIDOWER FROM HELL

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    6. At anon 21:07 thank God for ur life.

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    7. Wow ...Graceful Lady happy 70th in advance. Thankful you survived. ❤❤❤❤❤

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    8. Hmmmmm, graceful lady. Glad uve stayed strong and God has kept you and your children.

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  3. This will be interesting.
    Let me share mine.
    A cousin of mine was dating a widower. She left him when he kept mentioning the late wife's name. Whenever she does something nice like if she buys him undies, he will say 'oh this is how Pamela used to buy them'
    The one that shattered the table finally was that he kept calling the late woman's name when they are doing it.
    According to her, He will shout 'ayiiiii! Pamela! Pamela! Pamela!' in the heat of the thing.
    My cousin ran before ghost will slap her on the bed one day

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚ why the name Pamela though?πŸ™„πŸ™„πŸ™„πŸ™„

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    2. 2 bleesed 2 curse16 December 2018 at 14:34

      That man needs to see psychologist before he looses his mind.

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    3. Buahahahahaaaa
      Pamelas of nowadays ehn,fear them

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    4. Lmao
      This is very funny. I can figure how He screams it with his eyes closed. I would be scared shit

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    5. Beloved biko come and munch this for comment section stress reliever

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    6. Ikwakwakwakwakwa
      Pamela why?
      The man was just using your cuz as a rebound.

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    7. 😯😯😯😯 blood of jeezzz!!!! BVs will not kee pesin o!!

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    8. Mine still has her email account. Keeps her facebook page. Still has the joint account they had. So bad that when i went for a visa interview he gave me the details of that account with her name on it.i didnt see it cos i was to collect it at abuja. I only saw it after i had collected it on my way to the visa office.

      When our girl was entering the boarding sch. He used her email as Contact. And i was like its me who will help you with her why use that email? He said he didnt see anything wrong with it.

      No, i didnt see some of this signs cos we were in different cities. It is well.

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    9. Lol @ pamela πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚

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    10. Ikwakwakwakwakwakwakwakwakwakwakwakwakwakwakwa

      I have almost died of laughter here

      I can imagine him pounding her ponyor vigorously and screaming 'Pamela' with squeezed face and closed eyes like he is summoning her spirit. The dead woman's ghost will just stand in a corner of the room shaking her head.

      Abasi mmi ooo
      This kain gist dey sweet me well well and I no even like that thing like that.

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    11. That was thesame issue I had with my own. I borrow myself brain and moved away.

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    12. 🀣🀣🀣🀣🀣🀣🀣🀣

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    13. Inukwa Pamela πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚

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    14. Lols
      Her real name was not Pamela, I only used Pamela for privacy

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  4. Stella with the convos. πŸ™ŒπŸΌπŸ™ŒπŸΌπŸ™ŒπŸΌ

    My husband is a bit older and when I met him he was a widower. His beautiful first wife (rip) died years before we met. Sadly they never had kids.

    When my husband and I started hanging out it was purely sexual and marriage was never on the table. At that point I suspected he was married in his home country because of some things I saw. I later got to find out about his late wife and it became very very weird. He was still very much attached to her memory. Her death was even one of the reasons he took up a job in obodo naija.

    I felt like the other woman. I felt I would never be as loved or as good as she was. His entire family adored her and he is like a son to her aged mum. She was an only child. In short, I felt like a proper outsider, an imposter and subpar.

    When he proposed, I told him I understood the place his beautiful late wife has in his life but would never stand to be compared with another woman dead or alive. He still loves and misses her but ever since we got that clear, he has taken her pictures out of his wallet and bedroom among other things and I’ve stopped feeling like there’s a ghost between us.

    However, this doesn’t stop him from remembering her from time to time and I’m all ears and provide a shoulder when that occurs. His pain and attachment to her memory has reduced significantly over the years especially since we had our kids.

    Sometimes I imagine how I’d feel if he passes on untimely and can understand how he felt losing a woman he knew for 13 years. I don’t pray for that to happen to anyone. Ever.

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  5. My mom is a widow and I know she can never remarry. The case would have been different if it was my dad and honeslty, I wouldn't want a strange woman in my family.

    It has worked and is still working for some people tho.
    Personally, I pray not to unless the man has obviously moved on and there are no kids involved.


    God help us well

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  6. I can never marry a widower and I pray DAT my future hubby won't die untimely there is notin like getting marid to a single fresh guy with no baggages

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    Replies
    1. Life is a bitch my dear!we always hope for the best but anything can happen.prayer or no prayer.believe it or not.most times bad stuff happen to good people.

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  7. As for me I will remarry only when my children are all grown up and I am advanced in age. I am scared of allowing my new marriage to affect them negatively in their growing up years, we've been through too much together. Also, I am not looking to birth more kids. I believe I will be a sweet wife to the lucky man when the time comes. Lol

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    1. Same here, i’m a single mum of two. I plan on marrying a widower when my kids are older. I don’t want any man to come and mess up thier emotions since i’m the only support system they have known all their life. I pray God continues to provide and bless me so I can raise them right.

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  8. Im dating a widower. His wife died during childbirth. He once called me her name out of habit, but I didn't take offence. Early in the relationship, there was comparison in relation to our statue. But he stopped after developing feelings for me. Occassionally, details of things they did together would pop up. That stopped after a while too. Well, every relationship is hard, but love, respect and understanding goes a long way when dating a widower. I just understood they were building a life until her death. Though he has some of her things at his house, he bought some other things like a new bed + mattress. He gave me go ahead to change anything I want in the house, unlike when we started dating and he was protective of items she bought.

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  9. Am going anonymous on this one. Being married to one for some years now. I dont even kmow where to start. I have accepted the children, treat them nicely. You wont even know until you are told. I break my back so they can look nice. But no, its never good enough. Every mistake and error is seen as deliberate snd irresponsible of me.i have realised that even if i cut my hand it will still not be enough. I make nice dishes, go out of my way to do special foods for them.

    I am not perfect just someone doing her best. I cant scold i habe to talk gently. And i must say please to them even when i want to give instructions.

    After so many years, he told me recently he has not seen 5% of what is expected in a marriage. Abeg am tired of writing. Will keep doing my best under God. Last last am answerable to the Lord.

    Ontop of all this he has refused to encourage me have my own baby even one. And his late wife's sister is still with us. The issues i have with her nko? I treat her nicely. She is a trust as long as she is with us thats how i see it. But he has refuse to let her go. God is the who judges and i dont want to be caught on the wrong side. But the attitude and kai...but am at peace God is a righteous judge. He will judge rightly and vindicate me.

    I love my husband cos its a decision. Sometimes it doesnt feel like it, but its not a feeling. But its tough when you are not appreciated.

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    Replies
    1. Madam this is not love. He married a cook and caregiver for his children. You are better off single. I have a step daughter who I try so much to please but each time she visits, my hubby starts monitoring every of my movement acting as if trying yo protect her from maltreatment. I realized no matter what I did I was always not appreciated. I decided to stop all the niceness and mind my business, I just say hi now when she visits and leave her to her dad. I am not her mom and will not act as one.

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    2. Did ypur age factor play a role in this situation

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    3. You are nothing but a slave!😎😎😎😎

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    4. so sorry for all your troubles dear,keep trying but I sure know its not easy or you can take a walk.
      A very wealthy older 'sister' I know in church got married to a 'brother'(widower) with two kids.His wife died at childbirth and sister married the man 12 years after due to societal pressure. She cleaned this man up and did everything to make sure the marriage worked but nothing she did was ever good enough. According to her,he kept comparing her to his late wife in front of his kids and the twins always have something negative to say about 'sister'.She bought lands and other properties in brother's name just to make him happy. brother finally left with his twins after about 7 years of marriage leaving her to cater for 3 children.

      Looking at her now,a shadow of her former self,I don't pray to ever marry a widower.
      zainab makas

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    5. Your ttc issue, is the fault from you? If you are not sure, save and go for fertility test, if you are clean, get out of that slavery called marriage biko. You deserve to be truly happy. Go have a baby and live your life well. Hian!

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    6. He probably married you to take care of his children,he should have married his sister in -law. I don’t think you are meant for each other. He can’t change,

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    7. You are the househelp with free sex.

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    8. He's just using you to take care of his kids and free sex without guilt. Find solution sharply

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  10. My sister in-law is early 30s and a single mother. The husband scammed her and just married her for papers and left her with 2kids.
    She's dating a very rich widower who Is a surgeon based in US. He's 60 Same age as my father inlaw.
    They are not so happy because of the man's age. But i dont blame her she went through hell in her ex husbands hands. She said this man treats her like a queen. I think he lost his wife to cancer but all the kids are grown.
    I wish them luck.

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  11. Awwww sorry dear ,thats why i can never marry a widower.

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  12. If you are mature in age and wisdom, and can sincerely take care of the step children as your own flesh, then
    go for it. Otherwise, wait for a single person.

    Some years back, just fresh after youth service, ( I was 22 years old at the time) . A widower in his thirties was on my case. I met him in church and he wasted no time in asking me to marry him. He lost his wife during child birth and had a four year old daughter.
    I didn't love him, but I was almost yielding to his pressure. He introduced me to his daughter. His mum stayed with him to help take care of her. I refused seeing her. I didn't want any more persuasions.

    I just kept asking myself, was this all there was for me? Marrying a widower who was 12 years older? At my tender age? How would I cope being a step mom.
    I decided to ask my mum. She always says it as it is. The answer she gave me was epic. In her words, "a man who has lost his wife has no business marrying a small girl. He should look for an older lady who is his age. You are to small to fight this kind of battle".

    That was all the courage I needed. I cut off from the guy and stopped attending that church for fear of bumping into him.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Gbamest, a widower has no business with a small girl abeg

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    2. I love your mother

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    3. Nice one.
      A pack of kpomo for you!

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    4. @ Nne nwa: so true.
      @anony:I am blessed to have her.
      @Castle: I will remind you at my next order πŸ˜‚

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  13. I can marry a widower

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  14. And that was how..I met a Married man at the time,whose wife was very ill in the hospital,just almost same time we met..The man lied he was very much single and ready to mingle..Lied his sister was the patient in the hospital and her 2 kids wher in his house cos she was not living in that town ..just came to Lagos to be treated from her sickness using his hMo...I fell for that crap lies and was praying for his sister to get well soon in the hospital...After a while..he was unreachable for a week ..I became worried ..only to get a call later on saying he lost his “supposed sister “that was in the hospital ..and told me she was actually his wife of 5 years .and those 2 kids were his .I was dumbfounded..and just played cool...After the burial he came back with his sorry ass looking for a shoulder to cry on ..began talking about the late wife everyday ..though I felt really sorry for him passing through that but I was pissed at the same time ...I called the already dead relationship off ..cos I was just 22 at the time and couldn’t be a wife of a widower ..considering d relationship started with lies ....Hey you...I hope u can read This ..it’s been years ..he is happily married with a baby form the new wife ..I got married too ..I hope u have repentant and not going about deceiving young girls about you not being married ...Karma is a bitch

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    Replies
    1. Heartless man
      He couldn't even wait for the poor woman to die before running after small girls with lies. I pity his new wife

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    2. Fear some Men...and to tink that I fucked this guy all over Lagos..in hotels..friend houses ..damn ..without collecting money πŸ’°..was busy loving lik a mumu ...Love is a scam

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  15. My friend is dating a widower, 5 years and he's yet to completely let go of her memories according to her. I feel for her cos it seems like she's trying to fill someone's shoes....i usually ask within me if she really wants to do this but i don't have the liver to ask her yet. I hope she doesn't take any hasty decisions settling with him cos she complains a lot.

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    Replies
    1. Laura, don't worry I wont marry Wale.

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  16. My father died in 1996, my mother became a widow with 4 children. Am the second born if you actually see my mother you will think she is my sister because my mom started having kids at the age of 16 when she got married to my dad! When my father died after some years my mother started seeing another man. We were so angry with her we talked and talked but my mom was in love with a mystery man we had not seen before. My mother was going to see the man every weekend. One day we followed her when she left the house she didn't see us. She got to a house with gate and entered we waited for sometime like 30mins

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  17. My senior sister was so tall and big so we waited and burst into the house! We saw my mother with the man eating we started shouting and raining abuses on the man. We even poured the soup on the man. We told him to stay away from our mum we don't need any stepfather. The man was shocked he said he my mother told him that we were her sisters. We told him off and dragged our mother out of his house. We told her to choose between him and us.She eventually choose us we have been there for her even in sickness and in death! We became her husband. We cherish the decision she made because of us. She was a widow till she died with fond memories of her.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. ..but that was selfish of you people, according to your story, your mother was still young, why denial her of a companion 😎😎😎😎😎

      Don't let us deceive ourselves, there's no way children can fill that void, be it for a widow or a widower 😎😎😎😎

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    2. Yes ladybug we were not yet ready to share our mother with anyone then. How I wish we know then to allow her remarry. Now I know better. We did all we could for her but just like you said ladybug we could not fill that void!

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    3. Awwwwwwwwww
      You guys were jealous of your mum sharing her love

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    4. Chai. You were too young to understand. I'd have done the same at that age. May she continue to rest in peace.

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    5. Madam nkiru that was rather selfish. My dad too passed away early and my mum started dating but said she will never remarry so any man would not mistreat us.
      I actually wish now she got married. We have all moved out and gotten married and she stays alone. Though she stays in my house during school period to help look after kids and during holidays they go to her house. But I know she is lonely and i wish she remarried.

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    6. I would have done same. Una try

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    7. That's very mean & selfish if my kids try that I will right them off straight up they know me well they can't do shit if they see me with a man upon say they are mostly boys

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  18. a widow in my village met a man who claimed he lost his wife 2years bck. the lady started loving him, cooked nd washed for him, he even lived in her house until she 'fell pregnant' nd gave birth to 2boys for him. oneday d lady said she hasn't seen his parents nd would love to meet them for introduction since they re now couple. they started d journey to his village when they were close to his house he pointed it nd told her let him meet his frnd she should stay there nd wait for him. when d lady got to d house she meet a woman who claimed to b his mother, she told d lady that d person(son) she said came with her is dead. the wife disagreed oh after waiting for a long while, he guy didn't show up d lady fainted.. up till date that shock made her partially insane.
    #some are lucky while some are not

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    Replies
    1. I don't understand this story. She had two kids for a dead guy?

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    2. Did this really happen?
      What about the children? Did they turn out normal?

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    3. O.m.g give-in birth for someone who’s dead

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    4. Yeah phanuel unknown to her.. the kids are kinda normal sha. thats why one needs to b very careful

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    5. I have heard this type of story countless of time but never witness it. hmmmm

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    6. This gist na today? It happened at everyone's village. Oya show us the family kwanu where it happened, mba!

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  19. My dad got married a year after my mum died. He showed me the woman's picture when they started dating and they later got married. I was just 16 at that time and I just finished secondary school. She came and started living with us. My dad is a civil servant so he was transferred to another state in Nigeria. My step mum would hold the house only my immediate younger brother was at home with her. My dad thought her how to drive gave her a car etc. Anyways she was always looking for trouble where there was none. She was divorcee Sha TTCing.

    Some 5 years after my dad got married to a widow with 5 girls. The widow was my late mum's friend. The divorcee went mad literally and started causing wahala. In all of this my dad always told us before he actually acted. My mum's mum actually accepted the divorcee when my dad married her. My grandma told us to call her Mummy and behave ourselves so she had it very easy. I no get time to be doing any yeye second wife or competing for attention with my dad.

    Anyways when my dad married the widow the first wife which is the divorcee carried her Kaya and absconded to the US. I never set my eyes her for 3 years now. I have two adorable twin brothers from the widow with 5 girls and my Dad now has just one wife.

    Nobody should come for my papa o. Make una just face una front

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  20. please think it through because it is not easy at all most especially when kids are involved. I am married to one who lost his spouse and did not remarry after four years but am not still finding it funny because there would always be divided attention between you and his kids except the man is very matured and ready for you.

    ReplyDelete

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