Stella Dimoko Korkus.com: Chronicle Of Blog Visitor Narrative...

Advertisement

Advertisement - Mobile In-Article

Monday, January 21, 2019

Chronicle Of Blog Visitor Narrative...

This so messy......
 





STAND ALONE NARRATIVE
MESSY SITUATION...



Stella please your advice and those of BVs is needed here....
I am in a Fix and don't know what to do


To the issue.....
I am a 27 years old Graduate self employed doing great for myself ....
Got engaged in May 2018 to my boyfriend of 4 years
All introductions have been done. Planning towards our wedding this year.
Two weeks after our introduction in October, my fiance called my attention to his Ex- girlfriend.


He told me his ex girlfriend is 6months pregnant for him he just feel its right to tell me since we have had our introduction, he loves me and can't leave me. He apologised he cheated.


How it happened according to him....
She resides in another state, she came for a ceremony called and pleaded she spends the night at his place.
They made out and she left the next morning. No communication up till two months she called to give the good news of her pregnancy.



He invited her over and it was confirmed ,he to told her to keep it coz he doesn't support abortion and also told her it won't work out between them.
I was broken to hear it but he assured me all is well we will work it out together.
I forgave him 


He invited her over to meet me as his wife to be and get acquainted since she is having a child for him.
We met and talked about a way forward, gave her money for upkeep and hospitality agreed on monthly pay.


He went with her back to her parents to let them know he is responsible.
I supported in my little way took her to a baby shop and got her things for herself and the baby.


She insisted on birthing her baby in port Harcourt and leave after 3months and we can take off from there coming to visit and taking the baby for holidays. We agreed since both families are aware.


I took her to a hospital were she got registered.


Since October I never changed towards her coz I took her as my own always calling to check up on her.
She came in during the festive period and we all stayed together as a family.
She got delivered of a baby Boy on the 7th of January.


My mum in-law to be has been taking care of her and the child.


I went to the house to visit them after they were discharged with the things I bought for the baby, only for me to touch the baby and was shouted upon by my mum in-law to be, that I should be ashamed of myself I came to carry another woman's child when I have not been able to prove fertility since I have been with her son and that another woman has done the job I should leave and never return.


Meanwhile the girl was there smiling saying I should go and not touch her baby.
I cried coz I felt terrible this was a woman too kind that never saw a fault in me for four years that called me her daughter.


Oga has been busy with his child not even minding how I feel. Always telling me how much resemblance they share.


I explained everything that happened at his place but he told me to calm down I should know its just the Joy of a new baby and a first grandchild.


I am being neglected I don't know how I feel anymore how do I even tell him am pregnant without them feeling its out of jealousy. God knows am not a jealous but he decided to bless me. 


Should I forget the marriage issue and have my baby without them. Please advice.



*What messed up situation.....Seems your mum in law is trying to get your man and his ex back together?na wah..........
I dont know whether informing him would be good for you considering that she and your mum in law might have ganged up against you..
Does she live in the same house with your ex?if yes,you need Jesus to help you clear this mess.

I dont about you walking away but your current status with your man is not encouraging......first tell him you are preggy and lets see how it goes....

Please do not ever regret that you were nice to the baby mama ok?

199 comments:

  1. Really messyyyyy!!!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. A DNA to determine the father of the baby, I smell a rat.

      Inform him of your pregnancy too.

      Delete
    2. You should have left when you learnt of the other lady's pregnancy. Anyway, tell your fiancee and please get back to us because it's now our business🙄🙄🙄🙄

      Delete
    3. The guy even went ahead to meet the lady”s parent?You allow your self to be played .This guy is wicked ooo

      Delete
    4. Which time did you read to know how messy it is😂😂 Onye nko

      Remind me of emjay

      Delete
    5. Yes oo..@anonymous 15:09 please poster keep us posted cos it's now our business and we truly cares

      Delete
    6. Pls, its too early for all thus, introduction is not marriage, she will eventually sleep with him again even if you marry him, whether he loves her or not. Pls stay away. Forget him, start a new chapter because so many things will still happen in the future, I am so sure of that. Leave in peace oo, runnnnnnn, ur mother In-law to be just showed her true self, what if u TTC for a while, u will hear weennn, I don't know how else to say this, forget loving him, pls and pls, someone else is out there open to love you

      Delete
    7. poster, your fiancé has been gbenshing that lady. it wasn't just a one night something. see the flimsy excuse he gave you, that the girl came for a party and begged to stay at his place, bla bla bla. and you really believed him. Lmao... you even went shopping with her and took her to a hospital. who send you that one?? You've been played babe, you just didn't find out on time. forget the intro you guys did. Seems the supposed "ex" is now the new iyawo. Don't be surprised he has secretly paid her bride price already. That's why it's good to snoop sometimes. even if you tell him about your pregnancy, he is already attached to his baby mama abi wife sef. Well, just tell him about it sha and bring the rest gist for us so we can know how to advise you well.

      Delete
    8. Poster, I understand you have invested so much in the relationship that it was and is still hard for you to back out. Baby mama and daddy in Nigeria is different from the western. Your soon to be mother-in-law will want her son to marry the lady that already has a son for her son. You have a good heart, you love your man, you acted maturely but somewhere a long the line, you became desperate to hold down the man, and you got pregnant. What are you going to do now? What would you have done differently? No time to regret anything. Get an official test of your pregnancy, if possible get a scan with the gestational sac. Hand him the test and tell him you are pregnant. Watch his reaction, if he doubts you, do not argue, cry or cause trouble. If he has a sibling, you get along with, tell him or her as well and give him space. Please, stay away from that baby boy. The devil is our enemy if anything happens to that baby, you are in trouble. Stay away, pray for God's guidance. If he is your man, he will surely come back. It is better to throw away 4yrs than to live a life of perpetual ran out with this lady who now has a son and whom your supposed mother-in-law is now frolicking with. Your pregnancy is not going to change her mind, pregnancy is different from a baby but brace up, pray, give them breathing space and see what your boyfriend will do. Don’t break up with him but give him space and know that he will forever have a soft spot for his baby boy.
      You have known this guy for 4yrs and he slept with an Ex of how many years then? Something is fishy. Maybe, he and his mum are the kind that want prove of fertility before marriage. Is he an only son? Wishing you the very best. Don’t touch the baby, lady. Whatever happens, you are a gift you will forever cherish!

      Delete
    9. Poster walk away. But first, poison the girl...or visit babalawo and make her useless for taking your kindness for granted

      Delete
    10. Don't reveal you are pregnant now.
      Or you will not see the end of that pregnancy.

      Delete
    11. If she didn't see the end of the pregnancy she jejely waka na,and we go even happy for her. The reason I won make she stay put na simply because of the pregnancy.

      Delete
    12. Hmmmmmm
      Poster just let them know

      Delete
    13. Women stop forming too nice!
      You should have left that situation ship the moment you found out his ex was pregnant. This is what happens when you compromised so much all because you what to be called a supportive wife.
      What were you thinking going shopping with your man's ex. If you were already married I would understand the sacrifice but not a man that has done just intro.

      Are you sure this isn't a format to spend your money cos clearly you are the breadwinner here.

      Please have your baby in peace and leave that toxic family. You clearly don't have a hold on your fiance if not I would have advised you stayed.
      Please leave with your sanity. Unless you want to be entangled in a threefold web in the name of marriage.
      Your own man will come.

      Delete
    14. That is what I always say here. Life itself didn't favour women at all. Even to preach in church they asked the woman to listen even if she didn't understand she should go home and ask her husband. Poster what the hell were you still doing with the guy Immediately you found out that he impregnated another lady? Why didn't you take a walk? Poster you fall hand big time
      Infact i am out. @Blessed Princess

      Delete
    15. Abeg disregard anon 16:22. Such steps never end well. Completely disregard that advice

      Delete
    16. And people mock Annie when they do worse.

      Delete
    17. Poster nor mind d people calling u nice. Without mincing words ure a fool. U did what? Shopping? U dey mad? Was it love or desperation to keep d guy? U even slept with him after all this nonsense uve seen only 2 get ur own "pregnant"? Bia better move on n never look back. I repeat dont ever look back. Tell him what? No try am. If u can raise a child pls do otherwise flush that thing n move da hell on. U b real angel indeed. Mteeeeeeew.

      Delete
    18. Toh! If you were not pregnant I would have advised you to leave where you are not wanted. As it is now it appears you will be co-wives, if you can condone that situation.

      Delete
  2. You are such a nice woman but be ready for lots of issh when you get married to this guy that is if you gonna get married to him

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. A thin line between niceness and stupidity. Why can't the guy clean up his mess? I smell serious drama, even the baby mama is pretending and wants to be wifed.

      Anyway, both of you will end up being co- wives, would have told you to walk away but you are pregnant. Dude is eating his cake and having it, baby number 2 loading.....

      Delete
    2. Abeg make I perch here. What is this arrant nonsense? Anyway since you were following them to prepare for baby after you knew it was through cheating ,that means you were ready to be 2nd wife because as it is now you can't be first because her baby is older than the one you want to deliver.

      Delete
    3. Vera baby does not determine a marriage. If you doubt me go ask Sophia(Tchidi Chikere).. She can't be a second wife unless the guy is MARRIED to his ex.

      Delete
    4. This girl is stupid.. For you to still go ahead and get pregnant confirms how shallow you are. A green light was shown you to move away and thank God for not entering that union with that guy, you still went ahead and got pregnant and you are saying it isn't out of jealousy. Who will believe you even if its true you weren't jealous? The mother to the guy is a wicked woman and God tried to make you dodge a bullet but the mumu and desperation in you wouldn't allow you.

      Delete
    5. As brutish as your comment is...I must say I totally agree with you. She got engaged in May, intro done in October, she got informed about a 6 month pregnancy barely 2 weeks after introduction...forget it, the dude played on her stupidity. You fall in this kind of problems when you are never objective, when you always take matters for the head to the heart and vice versa. The dude knew all along, he just kept it to himself.
      His mother is a terrible woman. If same was done to her daughter, how would she react; it's quite unfortunate that the lady in return decided to "fall" pregnant...what a dumbass!!!

      Delete
    6. You should consider abortion if you still have time and get yourself out of the mess you got yourself into.

      Delete
    7. Do not tell anyone you’re pregnant!!!!! And leave that man!!! You should’ve done that once he told you someone was pregnant for him instead of buying more yards of ‘wife material for yourself. Sending your money on your fiancé ‘s baby mama?

      Anyways, I don’t wanna judge but please whatever you do, if you want a drama free future, sever ALL ties. I mean, all!!! Do not let him entice you with words. Are you sure it’s not cos of your money he’s did the intro and all..

      They will tag you desperate for still hanging on after finding out about the pregnancy and doing all that extra stuff.
      So have some dignity and move on! You’ll be surprised, God will provide a good man for you in no time!!!

      Delete
  3. Kweke!!!
    🙆‍♂️🙆‍♂️🙆‍♂️🙆‍♂️

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. You're such a FOOL, I'm not sorry to call you that. You got the opportunity to work away clean, when he told you he got someone else impregnated but you stay like a fool that you are.

      How do people have brain and refused to use it. Why the heck would you allow yourself to be in this position? What is wrong with you? I wish I could give you some good brain RESET slap.

      Delete
  4. Don't tell him you are pregnant yet, the pregnancy will show at the right time. Just continue to be good to everyone. God has already bless you. Take good care of yourself. And pray well.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Dont take this advice; henceforth every seconds counts. If you wait longer to tell him, by the time you realise, he will marry the baby mama and you will become a baby mama while she becomes a wife.

      Delete
    2. Story!
      Poster tell your man o. Before you're been accused of sleeping with another guy just to get pregnant.

      Delete
    3. If she tells him she's pregnant, I pray the pregnancy sees the light of day

      Delete
    4. Cont to be wetin? Nice to who abeg? Which kind advice b dis one? Smh. Una sha must make heaven.

      Delete
  5. Na wa oh, all these would have been prevented if you guys both zipped up and avoided fornication. Now, its so difficult to get separated from the family. Don't abort pls, tell your boyfriend and have it at the back of your mind that you could end up being a babymama. Zip up, una no go hear.

    ReplyDelete
  6. First of all, tell him you are pregnant. He doesn't have to believe you then give them space. She go soon fade. I understand the joy of a new baby.

    ReplyDelete
  7. This was the plan all along. You were just the mugu.
    Pls keep the pregnancy and give them space. Including your guy.
    When/if he comes for you and is apologetic and remorse, let him in on your pregnancy. If not, just face your front.

    From the look of things, he will marry the ex. She played her card well.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Highly favoured you don finish work with first line

      Poster keep your baby but decide what sort of future you want to create for yourself and your unborn child becoz I can see that that boy and his Momma are manipulative and self-centred

      Are you ready to fight eternally in your matrimonial home? you may go on with marrying this guy but you're too good for them

      They played you not knowing that God has already exposed them
      Marry someone and into a family that knows your worth
      Your heart is pure

      You will still find a man who would love you for your true value

      Delete
    2. You have said it all...she was been played right from the beginning.and the baby mama was acting playing along too.your mama inlaw can never love u again,she has gotten was she wanted a BOY for that matter,he kon resemble in papa..baby girl you are a gunner,tell him about the pregnancy and give him space.please do not go visiting again cos if that boy get small rashes they will say u are the one,baby mama is your senior wife now...it is well dear

      Delete
  8. Woman, if you have done traditional marriage; the man has paid bride price, you are his wife period!
    If you "forget about the marriage", it is divorce and God hates it.
    God hates also your husband breaking faith with his wife and forking another woman.
    Only you can make up your mind if you want to remain in this "marriage" to a man that browses every hole and hides it from you (that's if you are coming to equity with clean hands too). As it is, there is trust issues in this marriage already and can you vouch for him to to keep on pounding this baby mama?
    That mother of his raised a brat.

    ReplyDelete
  9. Why go carry belle naa, haba, was it out out competition or what?

    If there was no pregnancy, you should ve just stay clear n pepper them by stringing d guy along, let him n his ex thrash out coz of u. Or he marries both of u.

    Abeg I'm out.

    ReplyDelete
  10. This is a really messed up situation.
    U have a good heart dear and dont regret your niceness towards the baby mama.
    I will advise you tell him about the pregnancy and take a little break from all the drama and see if you can cope,if not just have your baby in peace and move on

    ReplyDelete
  11. You really have a good heart too bad it turned out bad in the end for you. Its your turn now with your baby, be happy jare. Your rivals plan has failed. She wanted to use the baby to trap him, she was so calculative. Tell him you are pregnant..

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Darling you would have walked away immediately you found out he got the whore pregnant. I still would have asked you to walk away but you're already pregnant .So I advise you stay, fight and make sure he marries you and not the ex...even if it means going diabolical . it'll teach that girl a lesson. .

      Delete
    2. The question is can she stand all the drama that comes with all this mess cos baby mama will do anything once she knows she is preggy.cos now she thinks she is winning,would really love to know how this story ends.baby mama is evil i swear

      Delete
    3. Which yeye good heart. A fool she is. Which rubbish good heart be that.

      Delete
  12. Just walk away. The girl and her baby will always have a special place with his MIL and you’ll have it really tough fitting in. Your fiancés attention will always be divided between his son, his mother (family) and you. Once those two have teamed up you’ll be inferior to him. Don’t mean to be negative but just walk away unless you’re the type that believe in “fighting for a man”.

    It’s a painful situation but you’ve got to put your sanity first. I sincerely wish you the very best. Heartbreak is a very painful thing.

    Ivannah

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Please don't walk away ooo..
      You can never have your sanity with your child alone so since you've accepted the babymama's child from the unset,now your own child is in the picture YOU DIE DIA!!

      Delete
    2. I didn’t even see where you said you were pregnant. I feel worse for you. Tell him you’re pregnant and inform your family members about it. If you have a responsible confidant let the person know the situation on ground. You need a good support system in this situation.

      The truth is as long as his baby mama is in the picture and she has the first grandchild son (stupid naija culture) there will be a strain and his family will be cold towards you. It’s also bad that his baby mama hates that you are with him. I feel so bad for you. You sincerely should have taken a walk the moment you found out he impregnated his ex girlfriend.

      Delete
    3. Fan...please don’t do this under my comment. I won’t make assumptions over how you were raised or your value system but no woman should die in any marriage. She should pick happiness and the emotional welfare of her child over anything. If staying back would make her child exposed to hurt and anger then she should have a rethink about the marriage.

      Delete
    4. Ivannah must I go with your comment? Oh because I wrote under you what happened with the owner of the blog now? Abeg lemme pass

      Delete
    5. Lol. Surely Fan, you should understand that by posting under my comment, your statement can be construed as a response or reaction to mine. That’s why I said don’t do this under my comment because I wouldn’t see a response I consider destructive and not want to counter it. Get it?

      By all means feel free to pass. I mean, that’s exactly what I would like you to do. But if you decide to stay here and be crass there’s really nothing I can do about it right?

      Delete
  13. What kind of chronicle is this?he got someone pregnant and you could not leave him?instead you were taking your co wife around to do what exactly?you now even spoil everything by getting pregnant.
    Why do we like complicating our lives like this?if you were not pregnant i will have asked you to leave the man.But now belle don enter.I am sure after this baby number two will enter.
    Take heart dear you will be fine.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. In fact girls of these days baffle me , how can u date a guy for that long and he impregnates his ex and u are not angry or hurt. If you can forgive your man that means u can forgive his mom and you don't mind him marrying two wives .since you have accepted her staying over .my dear if u sold yourself cheap you should not complain when u 're taken for granted. Hope you have a job to take care of your baby cos it won't be easy marrying this guy if the mom does not like you.

      Delete
    2. Anon 17:19- you said all I wanted to say

      Delete
  14. Ahaaaaa
    Naija girls and trapping him with pregnancy, na today e begin?
    The girl been prepare very well, spiced up and jazzed up during her
    ovulation and come jam the "puppet", im come score goal.
    Madam, if you no be the praying and fasting type, na wahala street
    you dey so.

    ReplyDelete
  15. I don't know how you women let yourselves guard and just get pregnant for any man shouting marriage. Women know their bodies and can decide when and how? I don't even know what to say to you. God forbid i put myself in such a messy situation, even in marriage, if i see a little irresponsibility, before i born for you eh, Jesus must come.

    ReplyDelete
  16. I would have asked you to leave your fiance but since you're now pregnant for him, inform him and do everything within your power to make sure he complete your marriage rites.
    At least let him go and wed you in Court for now. You can not come and carry last now ooo..
    Move in with him ozugbo ozugbo and force him to go and do Curt marriage cos his parents may not agree to follow him to your place or church for now so let him go and wed you in Court now.

    But were you thinking the babymama we like you for supporting her😁 she will always see you as an enemy so you better be careful with her.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Poster if you ever give him space that babymama will fully take over. I will advice you tell your fiance then pack your loads and go live with him. Let him inform his people and the babymama.
      You are now pregnant for him your FIANCE so don't go anywhere again ooo..

      Delete
    2. Supported. Drag him to court sharply and tie the knot!!! Don't give him spaceooo

      Delete
  17. Huumm



    You honestly tried. I don't know if I can do half the things you did.

    A man I'm to marry starting off our marital journey with a baby mama baggage.

    You forgave him right? Would he do same if you cheated?

    I honestly don't know how to help you because you're at the verge of loosing this guy.

    May the lord give you the needed wisdom to sail through this.

    ReplyDelete
  18. Hmmm. Madam. Weh done. Good woman of the year. I don't support any form of nastiness to the baby mama but you were damn too close. Cordiality abi civil behaviour was all you owed her. Someone who slept with her engaged ex was playing her last card and it looks like it has worked in her favour. You thought she came to play. Tell bobo you are also preggy nau. As you nice weh weh. Then keep to yourself. His actions after will let you know if it is you he wants or his ex now turned baby mama. Ndo oh!

    ReplyDelete
  19. I don't know you poster,but I feel pained in my spirit just reading this.
    May God give you clarity on this issue.
    No advise or suggestions would heal your broken heart but be rest assured,you and your baby would be just fine. Walk away if you have to,stay if you need to but never feel bad for being kind,karma will do it's job.

    ReplyDelete
  20. You shouldn't have allowed her give birth in the town you guys reside, you haven't have contributed anything for the child, if you really want to give go to an orphanage or motherless babies home, but that's not the issue now. Tell the guy ur pregnant and hear what he or they has/have to say not leave without letting them know and if eventually you guys marry, know how you go about your mother in law, she's not a good person. Good luck

    ReplyDelete
  21. Please, don't forget to give us feedback.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Please ooo.. We are here for you

      Delete
    2. Please please we will love a feedback and Stella please please maybe create new posts for feedbacks "chronicle Feedback... Blah blah"

      God bless you

      Delete
    3. Chronicle feedback post supported!!!!

      Delete
  22. the guy, his mum and your co-wife planned this all along. he expected you to leave when you heard about the pregnancy but you didn't so they had to come at you that way. leave the relationship and have
    baby without telling him. you don't wanna experience polygamy.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Gbam! Gbam!! Gbam!!!! I agree 💯 except with you keeping the pregnancy! Since it’s still early, you’re better off with a sad reminder of that evil man for the rest of your life!
      God will reward you with a marriage with peace of mind

      Delete
  23. Hmmmmmn! You really tried. Frankly, it is foolishness on your part to have stayed . Gosh! , what were you even thinking? Were you desperate for marriage? Ha!
    Well, you are pregnant now, just know that she is your senior wife, if you decide to stay. Baby Mama, my foot. Your man will soon pay her Dowry. If I were you, I would leave the guy, as for the pregnancy, I might keep it, depends on a lot of things.
    Best of luck with whatever you decide to do.

    ReplyDelete
  24. Awwwww, they have out played you. And you are such a kind person. May God show you a way forward. I know nothing about relationship or marriage so I don't know how to advice you but I do feel for you.

    ReplyDelete
  25. Hahahaha when you accepted her with open hands, of course she will cut you. She even had the baby in your town. Where is your own mother? This is when u need your family. Your husband needs to do a DBA test. Baby looks like me means nothing

    ReplyDelete
  26. It’s best you leave them after telling them you are pregnant. If he wants to be part of your child’s life let him . If not ho on and have your baby since you say you are doing well. How human beings can change is very surprising. The guy’s reaction to what his mother did is all shades of wrong. I don’t know how you will function happily in that family. Your own family nko? What are they saying? Both the guy’s mother and his baby mama are terrible people.

    ReplyDelete
  27. Nawaoo,people are so desperate to get married,you should have take a long walk when he told you the ex is pregnant now,no time for rubbish..I cant deal abeg

    ReplyDelete
  28. This is really messy! I'm sorry but I wish your pregnancy didn't come now, it would have been best for you to leave this your fiancé. The war that is ahead of you with that his ex will be plenty, even if your mother in law comes around. You made mistake by getting familiar with the girl. Your fiancé should have been giving her money from afar instead of all that familiarity and goodness you were forming.
    After all said and done, you need to be wise like a serpent to get your fiancé totally back to yourself and make sure his ex stays far away. You can take care of his son but that should be it. No familiarity with the girl since her mission is obvious and she wise pass you. If you want to stay with that man you will go and learn to be wise and sneaky.
    I wish men would keep their schlongs in their pants, this world would be a much better place

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Wise & sneaky? Really? The baby mama was "ex" for a reason & this situation changes nothing in the between her & d baby daddy. Do U think men re fools? He moved on from her to another bcuz he had a need she couldn't provide him, possibly this mean kinda wisdom even. The guy will follow his heart, he knows what he wants..

      Delete
    2. I beg to disagree about the baby mama being the one the man wants (if that's what you mean). Yes, wise and sneaky if she intends to stay. She has to beat babymama 1 at her own game. You can call it being strategic if you want but bottomline, if she wants to stay, she needs a lot of wisdom. Obviously babymama1 was very strategic with her plan and we are seeing how far.

      Delete
    3. His heart lies with the woman he's begging to stay & marry him... that's the poster

      Delete
    4. Except it doesn’t and he’s secretly hoping she has some self esteem and leaves. Just like he expects her to be enraged with the pregnancy and leave when he told her. The reason he didn’t let her know till the supposed ex was 6 months gone. They’re playing the poster for cash.

      Delete
  29. Madam so you were spending your own money buying baby items,taking your fiances baby mama to hospital and doing dutiful wifey to a girl your fiance impregnated. Wonderful......
    Let me tell you something that girl had a game plan all along. She knew you guys were getting married and she wanted to trap him. His mother may also be aware. It may even be their plan together. The girl may be her own choice all along.
    Pls why were you spending your money and doing dutiful wife to a girl your husband to be impregnated? I really don't get that part? I can understand you trying to meet her,so she's aware of your existence and you being cordial. But you overdid. Now you look like a fool both in her eyes and your in-laws eyes.
    I don't even know what advice to give. Cos it's obvious even your fiances love and attention has shifted elsewhere.
    You never should have encouraged their closeness. It should have stopped at him sending upkeep money and few visits in his parents house when the baby arrives.
    You don't allow that much closeness between past lovers that still share that sort of bond in a child.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. As in ehn! I’m sure she was trying to be a good wife when she wasn’t even a wife yet. Now they have all taken her for a ride. She was not wise from the beginning at all. What I’ve seen in this world has taught me that one needs to be very wise, with a little bit of scheming... if not other people will use you to play ball and tell you sorry at the end.

      Delete
    2. AdaBekee gbagam to your comment!

      Delete
  30. This is real mess...if I was the one, I'll have my baby jeje and leave the man... sometimes we know the end from the beginning of things..he doesn't love you..

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. He probably loves her enough to wanna marry her, but abit iresponsible to have slept with an ex, even unprotected.

      Delete
    2. Love pls. 4yrs of dating, over a year of engagement n almost half since intro n u tell me u aint seeing a "cold dragging feet" symbols? Dude has always bern slow when it comes 2 d poster bt was so quick 2 jump at baby mama n all her requests. Pls allow d poster to open her eyes n face d reality on ground.

      Delete
    3. A bit?
      Lol
      You women have to pick your self esteem where’ve it is that Nigerian men have hid it for you.,,,
      Seriously?
      A bit?
      He will impregnate a Neighbour and say he fel into the vagina..
      And there will still be excuses by the woman to stay with him.

      Delete
  31. Oh dear! Giving the ex girlfriend room is the genesis of your problem. Ladies are so quick to forgive, your guy of 5years impregnating his ex under whatever circumstance is the height of betrayal. Will he have forgiven you? But as you wanna marry now you were quick to overlook. As long as she's still in that house, you're single.

    ReplyDelete
  32. God forbid bad thing! You should have taken a walk the moment he told you he got his ex preggy! If you were the one who got preggy for your ex, would he have allowed you to birth the baby & still continue with plans to marry you??

    The things we ladies take all in the name of bearing 'mrs somebody'. 🤦

    Babe, you've shortchanged yourself simply because you've done introduction..so?? You got acquainted with the baby mama all because you felt you wrre lucky to be one to be properly wedded.

    Were the tables turned, would he have gotten acquainted & done all you did with your ex (baby papa)??

    For your sanity sake, just stay away from those toxic people before you use high BP & to injure yourself.

    I'm angry on your behalf.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Please and please leave that family alone you were never welcome. It was all a planned work. How come he kept the pregnancy from you until she was over 6 months pregnant? He knew as early as 2 months and made his decision about her but did not know how to discharge you since you are a good person.he proposed to you and did introduction with you with the help of his mother knowing fully well he impregnated someone else just to make you back off but you did not.
      Now count your two legs off that relationship and allow a better man find you.
      Decide if you are ready to keep your own baby with such a man from such a family.

      If I were you I will be rejoicing and cry my heart out to God for a better man.

      Delete
    2. God bless you Odun Odunayo..I like the part you said if you were the one who got pregnant will he allowed you...The answer is NO,I had a similar experience,i cheated on my guy he didnt forgive me,though we got back together but he is always referencing it,i got tired,only for him to impregnate another babe..i was so happy cos that was an opportunity for me to escape..he begged,cried and all but i didn't take him back.Good riddance ..ok byeee...

      Delete
    3. You three are wise women.

      Delete
    4. He wont take her back....
      My ex cheated on me had a baby untop...
      I saw messages on his phone with naked pictures of him and another girl... I asked him if it were me would we still be dating? After baby mama and cheating with a different lady he said No he will break up with me. .
      I just said ok...I forgive you, I didn't break up but was planning to wake up one morning and just send an invite for my wedding....some men are useless.. today I am out of that situation ...married to someone else and grateful

      Delete
    5. Am I the only person who noticed the baby daddy had sex with his ex in May i.e when he got engaged to the poster and told her in October after introduction. ..
      Hmmmmmmm inkan beer

      Delete
    6. He expected her to call off the relationship when he told her about the pregnancy. The thought of Mrs no gree madam so try she turn to bestie of ex girlfriend.

      Chai!!

      Women, we gotta do better!
      That man manipulated you. I for say no keep d pregnancy but Stella de y’all say she no de for dat one.. so all I’m gonna say is be sure this pregnancy is what you want. And pleas stay away from yhat man AND his family.

      Wash your face and dry your tears. You were just taken for granted , no be person die. Forge ahead. You just put your trust in God’s he wrong person. Shit happens but life goes on.

      Delete
  33. Hmmmm dear poster, it's well with you. If baby mama is currently living with you guys, I think you should tell him and leave the house for safety reasons, if not you tell him, stay and sort things out with him...it's well with you dear.

    ReplyDelete
  34. You've not even entered the family officially and Mother in law and her son are already showing what they're capable of doing.

    Inform him of your pregnancy, but whatever you do, stay away from that family or this would be the beginning of your chronicles.

    ReplyDelete
  35. You are a nice person. Don't regret being nice to the ex. That been said, I don't think your fiance is the child's father. The plan was too perfect.

    If possible gently ask him to do DNA (you can even call him anonymously).

    You have to tell him though, but prepare for the worst. Don't marry him if you still doubt his commitment to you.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. For him to accept, he’s probably been shacking the chic for months. Just telling the one night stand story to the fiancée so she won’t feel bad. How are you sure they didn’t even plan her all these while? Seeing as she’s doing great? Used her for anye natal, baby things etc. looks like she’s doing better than the man and they might have set her up from the go.....

      Delete
  36. Tell him about your pregnancy and give him space to see his reaction.

    ReplyDelete
  37. @Poster tell your man and take it up from there. Please do not force anything before they take you for granted. The situation is already messy.

    From your write to it seems you are comfortable and can take care of yourself and your baby. if you feel things are not right with the baby daddy and he isn't doing anything to make it better, it is best you leave things as they are and try to be/feel the best you can for you and your child.

    It is painful to watch how people you have been nice to, turn round to bite you in the back. It also looks like the Ex wants back, so make sure that your baby daddy shows clearly that he is only interested in the baby and not her before he drags you into a three way.


    I pray the Almighty grants you the needed strength to come out strong during this time.

    ReplyDelete
  38. I feel so bad for your, but tell him you are pregnant. Your man has no respect for you, and is so full of himself...Imagine telling you, he can't leave you, like he is doing you some favour. You should have been the one in that moment to decide whether to leave him or not. This is what happen when you forgive a cheat though. You will be fine. I don't like families like your man's. Backwards bunch. Your mother in law and that ex will give u loads of problems, no matter what. Decide well, and the lord is your strength.

    ReplyDelete
  39. Please dear, do look for a good time to inform him that you're pregnant for him, his reaction will prove how much he loves and respect you, forget him mama, she's just acting up because of the new baby, she'll come around, especially when she becomes aware that you're also pregnant.
    As for the ex(baby-mama), push her as far as possible from you and hubby when you eventually get married, she's no good news.
    Above all, pray for God's guidance, don't relent in your efforts in keeping your home if you love your man.

    All the best

    ReplyDelete
  40. This is really dicy...these are some of the reasons one would not want to have anything to do their spouse's ex and/or love child. My dear,be strong. Speak to your husband and tell him how you really feel about the whole situation. Try not to sound envious so he doesn not become defensive. His response will help you make your decision. Easier said than done but I pray God gives you strength to pull through

    ReplyDelete
  41. Your an angel being nice to that woman, if it were i would walk out your still young with a good heart God will bless you with a good man who will also accept your child as his own. Then again we are not in your shoes so we don't know how you feel at the moment. I feel bad for you, but that man was not made for you sorry pray Jesus is the way and the truth. God will see you through

    ReplyDelete
  42. Break off the engagement and go your own way. If his mother is already insulting you like this imagine if you have difficulty conceiving. Imagine the stress if you feel you will need to be in constant competition with the ex. Girl, you have not seen stress yet. You are being set up for a polygamous marriage. Ain't no joy of a new grandparent is going to make your fiancee's mother speak to you with such utter contempt and hatred. God has shown you a clear sign of the hell that awaits you, and trust and believe if he is already a cheat marriage is not going to suddenly make him a saint, you will have to be prepared to share him, and his babymama is going nowhere soon, she will be front and center in your lives for decades if you decide to follow through with the marriage. Remember, he defended his mother and did not support you by reprimanding her of the way she spoke to you which was completely uncalled for. You are somebody's child, your life has value and no woman should demean another because you chose to educate yourself and get a career instead of making babies as an unmarried woman. Your actions show character and a woman with personal ambitions.

    I don't know who you have on the other side looking out for you. Perhaps you are just a good person at heart, but there is favour upon you because you are doing well for yourself and you have been warned clearly not to follow through with this marriage. Believe people when they show you who they are the first time. Many women wish they had received such clear warning before they entered one chance marriage.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Difficulty in conceiving you said?

      Delete
    2. Sorry, I just realize that you stated that you are also pregnant. Hmmm. You could ask God to take back the pregnancy so you can break free. However, if you choose to follow through and get married then I wish you all the best.

      Delete
    3. Errr, so how will 'God take back the pregnancy' ????

      Mehnnnn the stuff I read sha!

      Delete
  43. chaii poster it is well with you. if I were you I will tell him about d pregnancy but will not go on with d marriage unless u want to be his second wife. Am beginning to believe that men are scum 😠

    ReplyDelete
  44. You were used dear.You are nice but didnt use your brain.No ex gets over their man like that especially when tgey have a child together.I feel you should let go if you want to still be happy in life Your boyfriend is selfish and a liar.He wants to eat his cake and have it as with most men

    ReplyDelete
  45. Please babygirl, don't have that baby out of wedlock. Your man is standing with U & i'm sure U still love him, try to not pay attention to the external forces (i.e Mum-in-law & baby mama) for now, @least till U birth your child in peace. Whatever U put out in the universe comes back to U, best believe this okay?.. Time will tell, the ungrateful baby mama will get what's coming to her. Congratz on ur pregnancy, U re a full woman...

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hian, ooooooh. Some people's mentality about this marriage thing needs to be changed, so she should rush in no matter what because she doesn't deserve to be happy? Sometimes we are actually the reason why this men treat us like trash because we show ourselves no love, we place no value on our happiness, we just want to be Mrs by fire by force.
      I hardly comment cis I don't really have time but I am going to take th. e pain and type my own few cents for the poster; first of all don't conclude from his reaction on how his mom treated u though that's bad but keep a clear mind that it might just be due to happiness at having a child and also bc of the way u went about the whole ish, being extra nice to the ex that he has forgotten that this is a product of his cheating on you

      2. Prepare your mind for the worst and tell him, u are pregnant, then Watch his reaction, that's ur key to the next action u will take, take note of his reaction when u tell him ur'e pregnant, forget whatever explanation he makes after, there u will know if to count ur losses and move on or to stick with him, A baby mama they have brought home and mummy is taking care of might not be a baby mama, bride price might have been paid without ur knowledge and later will be yearned another story.

      Be wise, that girl that inspire of all ur niceness to her treated u that way will not allow u peace in that marriage and the way ur fiance I going about it is all shades of wrong.
      There are so many single moms that have found love and are in very happy marriages. Take care

      Delete
    2. Anon dear, once a woman gets pregnant, her responsibility goes first to the welfare of the child before herself, that's what makes a great parent, the sacrifices they make for their babies. I'd rather poster had a legitimate child than a bastard, simply because she has earned it. If he still wants to marry her, why not protect the child?! It was conceived in love by the way, she didn't scheme her way into his life like the baby mama.. If it gets too tough to handle after marriage, she can then walk away. Better to be a divorced single mother in any case. I just feel she's is too innocent&nice to suffer society's backlash.

      Delete
    3. So someone who doesn't have a baby is what?
      Half woman???

      Mehn the stuff I read sha!

      Delete
    4. Anon 00:28, with due respect, I was making reference to what her mother-in-law said to her when she went to visit the baby. It's not a generic statement

      Delete
  46. Orishi rishi,You shot yourself,how on earth did you accept to continue the relationship?,so you can't quit after introduction? Indeed you want to be a good wife material a thousand yards?.Did you inform your parent?. When they say don't rush,you say you re not rushing. Run Along

    ReplyDelete
  47. Na wa for you ooooo. The minute the pregnancy story came up you for find your levels. Now you are pregnant. How rich is the guy ?? Can he afford having two kids in such quick succession abi you are ready to carry burden.
    This is a big mess. You should have checked out immediately that stupid story came up.. Now he is going to keep fucking her and you are going to keep crying.
    That's his first wife, you are the second. Incase you don't know, your wedding has been postponed. Use your tongue to count your teeth. This life is only once, don't die because of another person's child. You are somebody's child.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. As in ehnn. Why put yourself in such a terrible position. Imagine taking her for shopping and Co, as what please? Mschewww

      Delete
  48. That was how one SPDC guy was dating one lady. They had issues and he started another relationship. Reconciled with the first one who got pregnant. He informed second he wanted to settle down with the first because of the pregnancy. Second got pregnant too. He then started dating two of them. Eventually they had their babies. First boy, Second girl. He married first but the marriage was HELL!!! for first. Husband had money but she never enjoyed it. She died 2years ago after 20years of hell fire. Poster if you marry this man you won't enjoy the marriage. Two of you will keep on competing for his attention. But what do I know? Some people enjoy polygamous relationships.

    ReplyDelete
  49. Nonsense!We Nigerian women lack self love. How can we continue to hurt ourselves because of this unfaithful and disrespectful men who don't Cherish us? okay, Let us imagine that poster got back with her ex for a night and eventually got preggy...Will the guy stay? not to talk of the guys mother accepting that her would-be daughter in law is preggy for another man? Poster was cheated on,she stayed put, forgave the cheating prick and even supported the preggy ex gf. I will never ever understand why we women do this to ourselves. Now she's preggy and feels hurt. This would have been prevented if she had had enough self esteem to walk out on the cheating prick

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Girl, many women do not realize how the system is really setup. Across culture and nations the expectation is that a woman should always forgive because "men will be men". Every religious book place men as superior, even the God that is worshipped is identified as male, which is impossible because God is a spirit. Sons are worshipped more than daughters in many cultures. So the system is set for women to worship or show deference to men, and women who stand up for themselves are viewed as unfeminine or evil. Here is a young woman doing well for herself and her boyfriend of four years who she is sharing her body with for their mutual pleasure still needed to have relations with an ex and did not even think to use a condom to prevent pregnant and protect from Std. And she still decided to stay with him and accept that she will not be having the first child for her husband. We all know that her boyfriend would not have stuck around if the tables were turned.

      Delete
  50. If I were the mother in law, I would sack you to because I wouldn't want my daughter to be a mumu like you. What were you trying to prove by being that close to the baby mama? Someone who could open leg for your man without minding and you thought she's your friend? This should be a lesson to you. There are people you just have to keep at an arm length and this baby mama is an example.

    Tell your man you are pregnant. Ignore the baby mama completely and communicate with her only when it becomes necessary. Try winning your finance back to you and tell him to let the baby mama go or rent a place for her. For your mother in law, call her and apologise for touching the baby. You will not be a mumu; it's just a strategy. Tell her you are pregnant,she will be confused and since your introduction has already taken place, she wouldn't want to bring "shame" to her family so she will choose you over the baby mama. Above all please pray.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Good advice but I will suggest she damn the mother in-law and the babymama

      Delete
    2. Fan she should damn the mother in law after the marriage. For now, she needs the woman.

      Delete
  51. Babe who told u it was ever okay to get pregnant to save things you just got yourself sunk deeper into quick sand cos I know that's how come you are pregnant now that was the worst mistake and decision ever and I know u did it for love but love don't work that way. Trouble started the day he told you his ex was pregnant. That ex had it all out but u did not see it coming. You were also wrong for you to have let her come too close though I know u were trying to be nice. This was exactly what happened to me with my ex husband. Girl you are brave I don't think I ever could have handled it like you did so I choose to stay out. You are a strong woman but please start removing your mind don't marry that man. You will wet your pillow every night. He has no regard for u judging from him sleeping with his ex, telling you she is pregnant, telling her not to abort it even though I am not saying abortion is good but he could have suggested it and u agree to let her leave it. They are excited about the baby, his mum has spoken ill to u, what do u still want and you have said it with your mouth. I can Imagine how your heart bleeds every time he gushes over that baby. This is in Nigeria it's a baby Boy if it was a girl I would have said manage. You are in for a long ride if you decide to stay with this man. This shit is real men! weather in the Long or short run, may God help you make the right decision cos he has started hurting you already. Love shouldn't cause you so much and would never put you in harms way. That guy no try at all.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Poster staying doesn't make her a strong woman. A strong woman is one who realizes that her peace of mind is threatened and takes a walk.

      Delete
    2. A non 16:01, gbam. That's a strong woman not one who stays for what will only bring her pain

      Delete
    3. Poster did you get pregnant after hearing about the ex or what?

      Delete
    4. As per the god that she is or what? Even after the insult she received from her.
      Ungrateful set of people.

      Distance yourself from them and avoid unnecessary familiarity.
      Tell him you are pregnant and watch his reaction,that will determine your nest line of action. I wish you the best.

      Delete
  52. Poster i smell juju.. prayer is d key

    ReplyDelete
  53. Whatever you decide Poster,God will give you the closure you desperately need right now.You'll be just fine

    ReplyDelete
  54. I'm more than angry! women and suffering! Why do we live like this? why? why? why? you stayed and was forming wife duties to a man and to a family just because you wanted to prove them that you are a wife material? you are torturing yourself emotionally! where is your self love and dignity? the moment the cheating bastard made it known to you that his ex is preggy you should have held your head high and walked out but no, The society expects you to stay and forgive, the society expects you to stay and take the other woman's baby as yours. His family will never apologise to you! oh yes! he is MAN! nothing wrong with what he did. If the tables were to turn, you will be shamed,called and ashawo and his family and him will never speak to you again

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Leave society out of this please. This was clearly her own decision as she wanted to be seen as 'good wife'. I want to ask what her mother said when she was buying clothes and baby things for her co-wife. It's such a messed up situation

      Delete
  55. Dear tear race and no look back!!!!!

    ReplyDelete
  56. You should have given yourself sense after the pregnancy drama...well make him aware you are pregnant and give them space abeg till they come to their senses too

    ReplyDelete
  57. Would your boyfriend
    accept that you birth
    another man's baby and
    still go ahead to marry

    ReplyDelete
  58. You do have a good heart. That good heart is a treasure. Please do not lose it because of the treacherous ways of your mother-in-law,the baby mama who wants to take over and your fiance who lacks a sense of justice and fairness.
    Your mother-in-law is not a good person. Even if you end up with this guy,how will you cope with her? Especially considering that your fiance is this easily carried away.
    See that baby mama? She is a wicked soul. You mean she was smiling at your humiliation despite that you have been nice to her?
    Your fiance nko? That one cannot manage a home o! He can't cha-cha! He is ignoring you and fails to see and address the injustice his mother has done because he is basking in the euphoria of a new born baby?!
    Of course you will tell him of the pregnancy because he is responsible for it. If you manage to sort it out you will always have that baby mama to contend with. Are you prepared to be in a polygamous family setting? If she doesn't succeed to be the first wife, she will surely settle for a second position. Your fiance has shown he can be easily manipulated so you will definitely be in for a bumpy ride. As someone who was raised in a polygamous family, I am telling you that it is not an easy journey. Be wise.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Good heart ke? Or is it naivety and foolishness. Poster you need to wise up in life. It's good to be nice but wise. Buying baby things for a woman who slept with your ex and got pregnant was foolishness. Where was your self respect and dignity? Me I would never do such a thing if I ever found myself in this situation God forbid. Now the hand you fed has bitten you. I hope you've learned your lesson.

      Delete
    2. 'Good heart' without sharp common sense is a waste.
      People will so use you left right and center for this life ehn.

      Wife material 10 billion yards, market shopper toh bad, friend of the 'ex' whose vagina your fiance mistakenly fell inside.
      I have nothing nice to say, so let me keep quiet.

      Delete
  59. pls do not, i repeat do not go on with that marriage. his mother is wicked and insentive. she will make your life a living hell. what a mother

    ReplyDelete
  60. This is really crazy. We see why most women frown at any being coming close to their would be husband. Women sha! I feel for you sis. just tell him you are pregnant and let him know you can as well call of the relationship seeing him and his mother prefer the other chick. If he says otherwise, biko tell him to choose between you and the yeye gurl. God help you dear.

    ReplyDelete
  61. My dear, that man still has feelings for his ex. The ex played u well.And the baby which I'm guessing is a male child has secured her place. Your MIL will be talking to her child now to leave u and marry his ex so they don't lose the child. For all they know, u might even be barren. Tell your fiancé u are pregnant, give him and his family space. Don't ever go to their house. You have a baby whose life could be in danger now because u didn't have sense to walk away when God showed u a big sign.If he truly wants u, he will hasten with the marriage. If he doesn't, cry, forgive and forget him and move to a new place where u can raise your child in peace.

    ReplyDelete
  62. Get an abortion and move on. If you're afraid of finding another, them stay here

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Gbam!!!!
      Prioritize yourself and your peace of mind!
      That polygamous shot ain’t no joke. Pity your generation, please!!

      Delete
  63. I see someone calling poster a strong woman. I don't know why we equate suffering as being Strong. A strong woman is one who walks away from the situation that strengthens her peace of mind. A woman should never show her worthiness by sticking around a cheating and disrespectful partner. Poster, truth is you are not strong, you were too weak to walk out of a mess. you stuck around and was looking for praises from your boyfriend and his mum and baby mama

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. And in the end they used 911 to charter insult for her to drink.. POSTER LEAVE THAT FAMILY ALONE!! You will never find peace there, forget about that man. He will cry and drag on the floor with catarrh gushing from his nose, but let me tell you , it will be fake fake drama.. No man that loves you will treat you this way. He does not even have your time again, the baby this ,the baby that. For how long will you bear it?? Or you think your own baby will come and take the shine away ?
      God has seen your heart and He knows that you are a good person,come out from that place and allow Him to bless you. Please , I am begging you, please ooo...

      Delete
    2. Honestly, you said it all.
      I was once in her position.
      Boyfriend had a child I didn't know until the baby mama got my number from his phone and called. I felt my world crashing this was at 4 years of relationship. I forgave too, was in that situationship for 2 years. He never talk of marriage again even after doing to see my parents. We have a quarrel he takes solace by going to visit his child. I started feeling used.
      In his case he didn't sleep with babymama again rather he was cheating unremorsefully ..

      He hit me for the first time in the 6 years of relationship and my sense came back..I broke up immediately. For once I look back on that day and i thank God he hit cause I wont have had sense to leave. He played the game of I am sorry.. I forgave because I needed Gods blessings but unlike the poster I wasnt pregnant. 2 years after we broke up he got married not to his baby mama but to a lady he was cheating on me with while we dated. The lady was stalking my Facebook page then , subsequently liking his posts and sending inspirational quotes. A month later their wedding I got married too to the love of my life devoid of drama. Even my ex's mother and sister celebrated my wedding on their WhatsApp status and on facebook.

      I look back and I thank God for saving me. I look at my husband today and call him my answered prayers because he is everything I asked God for.

      I only wish this poster wasnt pregnant because this same people will look at her in future and envy if what she said about her being kind to the babymama were true.

      Now I dont support abortion and the baby though a real blessing means she is forever entangled with this manipulative family.

      Delete
  64. It's obvious ur fiance and his babymama have take advantage of you. And ur MIL is trying to get them together. Just follow Stella advice and see what happens

    ReplyDelete
  65. Or u abort n move on or you have your baby away from them , let them marry, but make sure you meddle in their marriage, oniranu oshi.

    ReplyDelete
  66. Just so sad the situation you have found yourself in. Please walk away. You will have too many people in your marriage and it will get messier. This is just the beginning. Her son will come before your kids. If you marry and birth a girl they wouldn’t even appreciate God’s gift and the pressure on you will magnify.

    It’s unfortunate you have got yourself with small minded people. Hope you figure out what’s best for you and make the right decision.

    ReplyDelete
  67. I hope you are wise to read the handwriting on the wall.
    I hope.
    Many were not so lucky.

    ReplyDelete
  68. For crying out loud, he cheated and told you 4 months after he found out! are you that desperate ? what happened to taking time out to think if you wanted to be in that situation ?? There are two simple options - remain there as per 2nd wife something or go and raise your child on your own. Either way inform him! Within three months, you have forgiven a cheating spouse, gotten pregnant, already experiencing MIL/ baby mama issue. My dear wise up and stop excusing being obtuse for being nice.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I hope your niceness is not as a result of guilty conscience. You may have snatched another woman's boyfriend, if this is not true, then you are a saint. Tell him you are pregnant, keep away and see what happens. If he marries you fine, if not, another man will marry you. Don't worry ok.

      Delete
  69. Babe, I feel you should leave him and his baggage but tell him you are pregnant.

    ReplyDelete
  70. Pls remove the pregnancy and move on with your life...if you don't you will be joined with that manipulative family forever

    ReplyDelete
  71. All your kindness will not be in vain,your unborn child will receive it back in hundreds fold.....push them aside and enjoy ur happy moment....it is well my sis

    ReplyDelete
  72. same thing happened to me but I was not pregnant. I stayed oh cos I had invested so much in the relationship. my husband is the only child, the mom was over joyed, she formed alliance with the girl to FRUSTRATE me. I no gree move oh. The mom would say the baby looked exactly like my husband even my husband too.I siddon dey look. We did court, trad and I got preg. I had twins, boys. Baby mama weak, hubby disliked her scheming ways. Mama passed on cos the child was leaving with her. I didn't allow him come stay in my house but I insisted he pay bills promptly. I decided to scheme and manipulate too and made hubby do DNA and boy was even 8 already. Beloved, no be my husband get pikin oh. She's frustrated and humiliated now and I have the last laugh. Fight for what you want oh even if you have to scheme and manipulate. Tankiu

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Wowwww,thank God for you

      Delete
    2. Fight for man? You people! Did you read where women in the bible were fighting over men? Smh some people think their existence is solely for their husbanda

      Delete
  73. This is a messy situation, the poster put herself into.
    Looking back, you should have walked out the moment you knew he impregnated his ex. He knew you to be very soft and weak, told you at six Months, and you played into his plans perfectly. All what you see unfolding is surely what would happen.

    You are NOT his wife yet, you should have walked out, infidelity is a big deal for me in marriage, how much more during courtship.

    My advice: Tell him about the pregnancy, move on with your life, and please don't marry him. The ex is back to his life, you don't want to be in a polygamous setting.

    ReplyDelete
  74. You are a kind soul but you need to move on. Men sometimes ehn, that baby mama is the first wife. Do you think you can cope with this forever?

    ReplyDelete
  75. Your story is real messy, you just have to inform him of your pregnancy, i would've suggested you walk away but with your pregnancy now move your things to his apartment.

    ReplyDelete
  76. Thats how my bestfriend boyfriend of 8YEARS got someone preggy last year while they were planning their introduction,she almost ran mad.this is someone i told 5years ago to leave the guy but love dey shark her then so tey she told guy and bcos of that the guy and i became sworn enemies till date.he begged and cried till the girl gave birth to a baby boy that looks so much like him.the mum inlaw told my friend that she should move on with her life since another person has giving her a grandchild,i feel for my friend.since last year no serious relationship and she will be 32 this year,it is well

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. And that is why they say unless you are married you are single. But 32 is still young. She will not attract a good man if her mind is still on the past, she has to get out of her own head and then she will send a different signal out. You have to encourage her to get out of her own head and put her energy into other areas of her life: career, health and wellness, family and her spirituality. Let her use her single time to become the best version of herself.

      Delete
  77. Nigerian girl mentality. Your man cheated on you, his co-cheat got pregnant and there you were acting all nice. One question for you, if it was your ex that came into town for a While and knocked you up, would your boyfriend stand by you, take care of you and continue with the wedding? I really hate our slave girl mentality in this country .

    ReplyDelete
  78. Poster you mean something as serious as another lady getting pregnant for your fiance happened and you couldn't inform your parents to give you good counsel. How can you be so gullible to believe a man who cheated on you with his ex? Now the lady in question has a son for your fiance who probably looks like his grand dad for your mum in law to be to treat you in such a manner. i will advice you tell your parents immediately about this whole situation including your pregnancy. Don't force a man to marry you because it will backfire and i don't see this baby mama leaving your fiance. You have been deceived from the onset. Do the needful and let your parents invite his for serious questioning when you didn't fall from the sky. I just pray God steps in and give you the courage the handle everything. All the best dear.

    ReplyDelete
  79. You complicatee the whole situation by getting pregnant. For four years, you didnt get pregnant o but because you felt threatened, sharp sharp, you get belle to secure your place in that mumu guy's life. MShewwwwww!!! You even went ahead to spend your money on your co-wife on different occasions. Dangote pikin. You wey for don do u- turn when the guy told you about the pregnancy. "I must die here" mentality.

    ReplyDelete
  80. Hmmmm what a nessy story but you should have walked away the moment you got wind of the pregnancy, introduction is nothing pls,absolutely guarantees nothing.
    My advice is get rid of the pregnancy, the so-called guy,and everything relating to that scenario and go pick up the pieces of your life elsewhere, hope you learnt some lessons though.

    ReplyDelete
  81. Go get an abortion in a good hospital and forget that dude. I dont know why folks are pretending like that baby is not gonna cause friction in your future love life. Ask all the single mothers here......

    ReplyDelete
  82. This poster’s story really touched a nerve.
    I was in a similar situation 10 years ago and was the same age as the poster at the time, 27.
    We had already done introduction,chosen our wedding date and already living together when he told me his ex just had a baby boy for him. I was broken. I was more broken because his mum who was literally like my best friend kept a distance from me once she was informed of the pregnancy.
    I moved out of the house because the pain was just too much for me to bear. I was shattered. I asked him to do a DNA but he refused saying he was sure the baby was his . He said he would never marry the girl and his heart was with me. I couldn’t deal with the pain and moved out cos I felt I was going to go crazy . The hurt was just too much. He was my everything.
    The most painful thing is that I was told the girl and her baby moved in with him a week after I left. I couldn’t believe it. He married the girl.
    A year later they had another baby.
    It hurts so bad that I will be 37 this year and still unmarried. I have had a couple more relationships after him but they did not work. The guys were jerks and were constantly demanding for money.
    Sometimes I am so down when I reflect but I know God is on the thrown and I will testify soon.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Mark these words today. God will grant you all you pray for. Don’t regret a thing! You’ll be fine and look back at all you’ve been through and smile.

      Delete
    2. Your story will change, no condition is permanent. Get up every morning and evening just before you got to bed and thank God for your husband and family and the peaceful and loving home he/she has provided you with. Thank God for your healthy and happy children and the prosperity you have in your lives. Keep doing this day and night for three weeks and I guarantee that you will meet the person who will be your husband within a month's time and you will be happily married within six months. Act in faith and thank God for what you do not yet see and it will come into reality, this is a universal law that cannot change. Start thanking God as I told you. Consistency and belief is what matters. You will not immediately be filled with the faith, because you cannot see any man yet, and we are raised steep in the physical world to depend only on our five senses as all that is real, but when you start doing it day and night just before you go to bed it will eventually become a part of your being, keep doing it for no less than three weeks or until you feel God in you, and then you know it is secured. Thank me later.

      Delete
    3. I say a big amen to Ivannah’s prayer. Keep a positive attitude dear.

      Delete
    4. May the good lord bless you, with your own joy that will last you a lifetime, for choosing not to settle for less than you richly deserve.

      Delete
  83. For the now ignore ur fiancee.see his reaction.ur destiny is not tied to four.when he reaches out talk to him heart to heart.dont tell him u Re preggy yet.watch him after d conversation.

    ReplyDelete
  84. Tell him about your pregnancy. Avoid him and his mum. You will be fine.

    ReplyDelete
  85. This story is so complicated. Everyone has said it all, lots of different advice up there. Poster you have made your mistakes now is the time to make things right by choosing any of the advice shared here. You now know the character of all parties involved from the ex who refused to be an ex and kept coming back for more till she got what she wanted, to your man who has been cheating secretly behind you but this one exposed him to the mother in-law who has a grandson now so every other prospective wife can go to hell. It is a very bad love triangle and it may or may not favour you. It will involve a lot of manipulation, prayers and all. If you feel you love this man enough to stomach more bad things (if any) that will come from this then stay and weather the storm and hope it gets better. If not leave. But if you leave with the pregnancy, then the ex becomes the woman of the house and does the same you did to her in terms of making all the decisions about your kid. Know that if you keep the pregnancy it will be a constant reminder of this episode in your life and most single girls are struggling to hook good husband let alone a mother of one. So think deep and choose what side you want to see yourself 5 years, 10 years from now.

    ReplyDelete
  86. A broken relationship is a successful relationship. Poster, this situation is filled with avoidable prayer points. Please leave the new family and God will give you rest

    ReplyDelete
  87. Your bobo has paid her bride price incase you don't know and you are the mugu side "fowl".You made a very big mistake by trying to fix a mess he created with all pleasure!Both of them just played you.
    you have 2 options..
    1.Abort that pregnancy and move on with your life and delete him from your memory.
    2.Birth that baby and become a single mum...who knows,you can meet your own husband later.
    Whatever decision you take,flee from that guy now or else,you will keep fighting for the rest of your life!

    ReplyDelete
  88. Poster,you were not smart enough,believe me there is nothing that makes a man happier than sewing his first fruit.you should have walked away the moment he told you about that girl cos as it stands right now.your man will marry that girl for the love of his child,his first son while you have turn into the baby mama because introduction is not marriage.all these while you were doing good for the girl,she was laughing at your back cos whether your man likes it or not,she will lure him with that child and by next year,she will be pregnant again so pls put yourself together and look for another man.i wish you all the best.

    ReplyDelete
  89. Please we want to know d feedback so we can advice you but focus on his reaction when you tell him you are pregnant

    ReplyDelete
  90. The way he behaves when u tell him u are pregnant would determine what u have to know, but u were not wise ooo, I can never get close to a man’s ex or babymama cos I consider them as my enemy

    ReplyDelete
  91. Don't tell him u're pregnant, just go away and have ur baby in peace but remember u're in a serious battll and might be attacked either spiritual or physical.All the best

    ReplyDelete
  92. Get his hair and the baby’s hair and do DNA. Don’t tel anyone. And if it comes out to be his baby, move on! If not, tell him about your pregnancy and insist he does DNA on the baby...


    That’s the only way to get clarity!!

    At least dna isn’t expensive anymore

    ReplyDelete
  93. Poster you made a big mistake by accepting that crab that the lady will corporate after she put to birth. From all indications it shows she was desperate to separate you and your boo.

    You have already made the mistakes, I want you to cross it over and move on. Look for a good time with your boo and talk things over with him. Make sure you talk one on one about your pregnancy, if he is acting funny just lock 🔒 up and take care of your child, after all he has paid some fee on your head. I wish this news came before the birthing of that baby, make sure you hide this your great news from your would be mil and cowife, those people could do something crazy.

    ReplyDelete
  94. There is a thin line between being nice and foolish.. Do not abort that child but never marry him

    ReplyDelete
  95. Poster do not tell him you are pregnant and do not abort the pregnancy, just watch and see his reaction towards you, if he truly loves you, this is the time to find out, also have it in mind that whatever result you get either he loves you or not, marrying this guy means you are ready to face whatever bullshit comes out of his mom, your enemy is your enemy no matter how related the person is to you. she has already picked sides... If you are not ready to face that battle, then don't start it because you will definitely loose.

    ReplyDelete
  96. your marriage is dead on arrival

    ReplyDelete
  97. tell him about the pregnancy cos you were engagede and both families are aware. tell him you are not comfortableb with the mothers behaviour and attitude and she needs to explain to your parents why she should tell you never to visit the house again. his actions and tthe mothers response should determine how u react. never let people look down on you or treat you like shit. he should be man enough to tell his mother the truth about her actions. that girl should not be living with his mother cos she is a baby mama. if he is going to marry you then any other woman is a visitor. period

    ReplyDelete

Disclaimer: Comments And Opinions On Any Part Of This Website Are Opinions Of The Blog Commenters Or Anonymous Persons And They Do Not Represent The Opinion Of StellaDimokoKorkus.com

Pictures and culled stories posted on this site are given credit and if a story is yours but credited to the wrong source,Please contact Stelladimokokorkus.com and corrections will be made..

If you have a complaint or a story,Please Contact StellaDimokoKorkus.com Via

Sdimokokorkus@gmail.com
Mobile Phone +4915210724141