STAND ALONE NARRATIVE
HITTING ON A GUY FOR MARRIAGE
Bvs pls I want to ask a question.
There is this guy that I really like. He is a friend to my male friend. He is based in another state. We went to the same university but he was years ahead of me and I never knew his name.
We have never been friends. But know mutual people. He may know me as I was quite popular and hot in school,LOL. However I noticed him on my friends IG and started following,he's followed back also. I have found out and he is currently single.
This guy is everything i want in a man. Extremely handsome,good Christian,has a very good job in IT and comes from a good family. Will I look desperate if I send him a DM. Or should I go through our mutual friend who is a guy. I also don't want to look desperate telling that friend to hook us up. Should I just message him directly and hope for the best. It is the first time I am ever doing this. I'm nervous. Need your views ?
*Go into his DM and say Hello....Dont hit on him first..begin with a friendly conversation..He might have someone in his life despite what you heard and he may not like you but if you hit on him,the thought of gbenshing can make him play to your tune until he gets what he wants.........
This guy is everything i want in a man. Extremely handsome,good Christian,has a very good job in IT and comes from a good family. Will I look desperate if I send him a DM. Or should I go through our mutual friend who is a guy. I also don't want to look desperate telling that friend to hook us up. Should I just message him directly and hope for the best. It is the first time I am ever doing this. I'm nervous. Need your views ?
*Go into his DM and say Hello....Dont hit on him first..begin with a friendly conversation..He might have someone in his life despite what you heard and he may not like you but if you hit on him,the thought of gbenshing can make him play to your tune until he gets what he wants.........
Please by all means slide into that DM. Lol
ReplyDeleteAny babe that plays this stunt with me, directly or indirectly, i always know... women rarely do this, and the few that do, they cant hide it, their eyes or body language gives them away.
DeleteI lose interest immediately, i can pity you and give you prick sha, so you'd bot feel too bad, but i just cant take you serious no matter ur good attitude or beauty, its just my mentality sha, not proud of it but thats how i see it.
Sis shoot your shot.
DeleteImmanuel is that you? @Anon 15:46 mtchewwww
DeleteJust slide into his DM and say Hi, if he reply ask one IT question, or just create a decent conversation, try platonic with him, he may not b into women u know 😏
DeleteTry to be Friendly, no show desperation o o or else na chop and run e go do u and he will gist with his friend.
You remember that my friend to me and i told Ceec and Ceec to the world saga
Lol
Stella thanks you posted my story. I'm the poster.
DeleteHe actually sent me a DM same day but I didn't go on instagram till days later so didn't see his DM.
We have been chatting for two days now. Biko wish me luck.
But I really don't know if it's just friendship. But we are talking now. Apparently he remembers me well and had a crush. But me never know if he's in a relationship. Too early to ask.
Wish me luck guys. This guy is everything and more.
PLEASE DONT SLIDE INTO ANY DM!!! I REPEAT; DON'T TRY THAT SLIDING INTO DM SHIT!
DeleteMay I suggest you find a reason to celebrate and send him an invite or find a way to get close to the closest person you know to him and find an opportunity to hang out with him. Get friendly first and be cool and collected about it. Don't try to hurry it or you send out the wrong signal.
Jeez...We all knew how to exist and do stuff b4 social media didn't we?
You want him, get yourself in his face and strik a friendship first.
Meanwhile, all the nice things you wrote up there; good looks, good job, good Christian, good family, hope you also have a good CV to match. It's always easier when you also have things going for you. Success is seductive.
Guess Anon 15:46 is one of all this small boys who's just starting life with small change but believes they have arrived and all girls are to lick their fake ass shoe...boy grow up ok. You pity and give her prick🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄 really shows how your ego is just the bloat of an abandoned baloon behind an old couch. Radarada🤣🤣🤣😂😂😂
DeleteChai!!!!u get mouth
DeletePoster me nor fit o. Whether subtly or not. Infact if I like u n unto me it takes time 4 me to show it dont know why but I guess I'm just wired that way. So I cant advice u to do what I can't do. U can start by just commenting on his post n if u do that once or twice n dont get any response free d guy. Plenty others are available.
DeleteWomen rarely do this..but you can give it a go and give it time don't rush
DeleteI think you should try and get to know him more before concluding you want him o. Appearances can be deceptive. I'm not saying he is not all you have said he is, but often times you can build an ideal about someone and then when you finally get close, you realise it's not what you were thinking. Before making any moves, try to be sure of what you really feel. When you are sure, make your move subtly but focusedly, after all Ruth got Boaz forming sheave gatherer.
DeleteI'd rather ask his friend than slide into the DM.
DeleteYou can try girl just be careful and with prayer who knows he could be your husband.....good luck
ReplyDeleteEverything na prayer, na wa o
DeleteHia prayer kwa? Biko calm down it's not that serious!
DeleteThanks Goke.
DeleteMy first epistle just vanished.
He has contacted me himself. I didn't even see the DM for days as I wasn't on SM.
We have been chatting for two days now. I'm playing it cool.
Wish me luck.
Chatting doesn't mean shit!
DeletePoster good luck. See as I'm happy for you😊😊 The way I love love err; there's no part two.
DeleteOh that's cool
DeleteIf he never had a good job would you have wanted him? If NO,dont but if it's a YES then go for it. But please don't shade a tear when the relationship goes sour cus this is Nija and not Yankee.
ReplyDeleteShed*
DeleteShe admires him cus of his job, if he was struggling or starting life she wouldnt look at him twice, thats women for you.... we men don kuku know them, we'd fuck you and move to the next, then marry financially stable ones too
No sane woman wants any jobless man @The be!!!
DeleteGood job as a criteria is as valid as wanting him edu ated, God fearing and we'll mannered.
u people seem to have alot of problem especially when u hear someone is doing well..U leave the topic and attack other things..Wats your source of frustration pls? Its not bad if a woman is attracted to an hardworking man who is doing well for himself,same way men are mainly attracted by physical appearances..U people got one big problem and she isnt the reason for your misery
DeleteOk,this is how u gonna go about it,when he accepted your friend request,have u both had any convo yet? If not,then you initiate a convo,start with hi,long time and any bla bla bla that comes to mind to keep him hooked on the convo,the rest is up to jah,if the thing go well,good,if e nor go well,good also,no shame in chasing what you love.
ReplyDeleteAbi o.... And pls poster don't start with "have you eaten? what did you eat?, I want to know you better, can I meet you?, tell me about yourself"... He will not just bother to reply you.
DeleteDm ask for his number to discuss a career in IT for yourself or a “cousin”
ReplyDeleteGet the number and call. He’ll take it from there if interested
Oooshey! Bhaddest!!!
DeleteAGELESS T.
Loooooool!!!
DeleteWhich cousin? Oya he should call me
DeleteHahahahahahaha
DeleteYour head correct
Poster see this angle o o in direct way of asking for his number
Lol
Be a go getter... If you truly like him,DM the guy abeg but be ready for anything that comes up cos most times na punani they demand and so use your head.Dont go through that his friend cos of third party wahala,so your secrets can be intact.
ReplyDeleteIn this part of the world, it is not right for a lady to hit on a guy first. I will advise you to dm him and be changing your beautiful pictures every minute of the day. He might be get the message. Also keep your mind open. Good luck. It will definitely end in praise
ReplyDeleteGet which message?
DeleteIs he the only one seeing the pics? Someone like me i'd just see you as one jobless lady, more reason to flee
Changing your dp every minute makes a lady look unserious. Let her have a good conversation with him abeg.
Deleteyou too dey reason like back of pot.......gosh
DeleteThanks he contacted me himself. I didn't even respond for 4 days didn't see it.
DeleteContacted you? Saying what? Las las na easy pussy guy man go chop
DeleteSome of you will never find something good to say. We went to same school and we have mutual friends, so there is plenty to say.
DeleteHis best friend is also quite close to me. He's not a stranger I don't know so calm your tities okay.
Please o, why did you send in chronicles if you want to antagonize every response you get.
DeleteNaija girl's tohtoh don dey salivate o 😯😯😯😯😯
ReplyDeleteAbeg 🙏🙏 make you no go carry fork destroy this soul
whom you described as a "good Christian".
Are you a good Christian
Ajuju n' ese okwu?
😊😊😝😝😝😝😝
I tire for the matter
Delete😂😂
U can slide but don't appear like an easy catch..else he will say u offered yourself to him, you know men can't say NO...they are cheap like that 😁😁😁
ReplyDelete"MOST" men are cheap like that @BlackBerry..
Delete"THE MEN YOU KNOW AND HAVE MET can't say No"..Please kindly change your circle.
Regards!!
@MARTINS ABOY
Blackberry, its just the Da boyz you cross path with, how will they say No?
DeleteChai.. Martins youre wicked.
DeleteWhat are u trying to call her? Not that we dont know already sha
😂😂😂 where all these doomed cargoes come out from?
DeleteBlackberry thanks he's contacted me himself now.
DeleteEnter your comment...never ever toast a man
ReplyDeletePopular and hot in school huh!
ReplyDeleteYour head don calm down aspa age is going, no problem sha.
But lemme tell you, most reserved guy are super choosy, so you think ure the only girl with eyes admiring him.... join the long queue.
Some of u just write rubbish
DeleteYes and i am still very hot. And he had a crush apparently as hot girl that i is. Kwakwakwakwa
DeleteMy dear Meghan Markle marry a younger Harry at 36. A beautiful woman is a beautiful woman.
Anon 15:26 why are you sounding like a hater?
DeletePoster, mtcheeeeew.
DeleteI even thought you had small sense sef.
All your beauty na you de chase man first. You no shame
DeletePoster is chasing a younger man, SMH... shame don finish, after ur hotness, that guy will see right thru you, youre desperate. What makes u think he wants older woman??
DeleteIm the poster guess you have problems with comprehension when I said he is years ahead of me in school. I was in year 1 and entered school at 16. While he was in final year. Reason i didn't know his name.
DeleteTheir last born was my set in school.
You will be alright anon. Not my fault God blessed me with beauty. I won't even respond to you again.
Which beauty are you on about? Abeg shift with all your hot and beauty talk.... you de chyke man, how beautiful could you be? Blowing your own damn trumpet.
DeleteThis poster, you get as e be. Very cantankerous, no wonder you are having to chase man as supposedly hot as you are.
DeleteHe followed back out of courtsey, and he didnt ask a question, has he even liked one pic of yours? No!!!! Oya rest he doesnt like you, dont go falling your hand more
ReplyDelete...trully, if he followed back and didnt like your previous pic(s) i doubt hes interested. Most guys dont see what catches their attention & ignore, no matter how shy some guys can be, he'd at least like/comment/smiley a pic of yours.
DeleteHe liked it and he has contacted me. I'm new to SM.
DeleteStellaaaaaaa!!!! Everything for you is gbenshing! Why do women always think that way towards men? The gbenshing cannot occur without both parties agreeing to it and enjoying it. These days women are more sexually aggressive than men, especially in Africa - don't know if it's for money or pleasure reasons. That has been my experience these past 5-10yrs. Pls remove that thought from your head.
ReplyDeleteGo with Stella's advise... good luck
ReplyDeletePoster if you are not in the same church with him, visit his church then ask to see the pastor for counselling. When you go to the pastor, tell him how you've liked a man in his church since school days and will be glad if he could hook you up as just friends as you are shy since you are a woman. This is the safest way as he wont treat you anyhow because someone he respects is involved. Also there you will know if he has someone or not.
ReplyDeleteAll the best.
oh sweet jesus..........Did i just read this?
Delete@ 15:55 are you for real? Pastor kwa
DeleteAre they getting married? On top boyfriend and girlfriend? Na wa o!
Poster don't listen to this advise. Nor be only pastor. na everything them dey visit pastor for counselling???? she kill person?
DeletePoster flee this advice!! Pastor ke
DeleteHe's everything you want in a man? Issoryt, na when him don enter u go know how far...
ReplyDeleteExactly!
DeleteYou can never know someone until youre close enough...
You just concluded from IG pics & his family background? WOW!
He might love keeping malice.
He might have body or mouth odour.
He might have finger battery peepee.
He might be a flirt & sexter.
He might have severe OCD.... etc.
All the qualities you listed, why is he still single, you think its just your eyes that work fine?
Yaba left I know his junior sister though we were never close. We also know mutual people.
DeleteNobi from IG pics.
Poster, you dont know him las las.. goodluck finding happiness sha.
DeletePoster you are talking too much
DeleteYou’ve told us he reached out. Now go and enjoyed a date or something. Stop looking for validation with strangers. He might be right for you or wrong . No one knows
DM the guy with just a hello, how are you.
ReplyDeleteIf he respond in a likeable tone, then, you can proceed to ask him more few questions about his well being and profession and then, his phone number.
Please, do not act like a desperado, that may be a turn off to him.
I don't see anything wrong in a woman telling a man she likes him and would like to be friends with him.
Goodluck and do not forget to keep us updated.
Don't say Hi and be forming familiarity, he will know!!
ReplyDeleteEnter him with IT, look for a course or whatever and ask for his opinion on it.... Infact, one Anon has said it up there!!!
Pele, it's well
Slide into dm sharp sharp nah
ReplyDeleteI just hope the guy is worth it sha. This one "everybody is saying slide into dm". It's not all dms they slide into o. Babe you better watch your back and shine your eyes wella if you really wanna slide
ReplyDeleteWhat manner of desperation is this? Gosh! Some of y'all amaze me. Stop chasing men you won't hear! This guy doesn't even like you to begin with..
ReplyDeleteHe'll only hit and run trust me! That's what your type deserve anyway
Abeg u know nothing
DeleteMultiple women are married to guys they sought out for themselves. Play easy and get him
This is what I'd call 'lust' as soon as you slide into his dm,and get to know him better,you are sure gonna lose interest in him after gbenshing
ReplyDeletepls there is nothing wrong in shooting your shot,i once did and it worked out for me ,infact i invited him on a date and we became an item and got very serious with him being more in love and i eventually left him because he wasnt what i thought he is. He cried eh with so muuch begging but i didnt go back to him cos he was a one minute man.
ReplyDeleteChai!!!!
DeleteHe's a one minute man? His own is still good na. Shebi there is one man like that who his ex accused of lasting for forty-something seconds.
DeleteSome Nigerian ladies are too conserve, too proud. Can't believe you all are finding it difficult to ask a man out in this time and age. We are all adults please and to a large extent equal. What is a man that you are scared to ask out? We no carry fire for head. Least wey go happen, e go say no and you move the f on. So what if he thinks you are desperate, who him thinking epp? Sister, shoot that shot anyway.
ReplyDeleteIt’s it always pride. It’s usua fear. Great of rejection.fear that you’ll tell all your friends Nd make fun of us
DeleteMost nigerian men living in nigeria were not raised to respect women or see them as equal, so it's a risk hitting on them. They are likely to take advantage of the girl and her feelings, and many kiss and tell. Nigerian women were raised to respect and 'worship' men, and the idea of relationship/marriage. But in all It's better to know the mentality and exposure of a guy before hitting on them.
DeleteDon't just say hello. Let your first DM be like a question or enquiry. For example, he posts a picture wearing a nice khaftan and you will inbox him to ask where his tailor is based. That you want to gift your favourite cousin/brother a nice khaftan. Be polite and direct. Don't be doing too much "lol" inside the inbox.
ReplyDelete"Hi, is your tailor based in Lagos?".
Or maybe he posted his location as Akwa Ibom. You will inbox to make enquiries about University of Uyo Msc program. Just ask a question that requires feedback and would lead to both of you exchanging contacts. Be patient and don't rush any step.
Do not go through any middle man please. A guy that is not dating you can get very jealous and competitive. Forget that the guy is just a friend.
Then, you will be posting fine fine pictures. Your posts should be irregular. Don't Dm him and then rush to post pictures 2 minutes later. No quotes or any of that inspirational BS. No subbing of anyone. Just maintain an aura of mystery. And like a lioness waiting for it's prey, you will gracefully pounce on him when the opportunity comes.
Key word is gracefully.
If yu no come like d cloth Wey I'm wear nko😂😂😂😂
DeleteEd she must like it abeg 😅
DeleteWHY DO I HAVE A FEELING SHE'S LYING THAT HE CONTACTED HER. IT'S A TRANSPARENT LIE. SHE DIDN'T EXPECT THIS KIND OF RESPONSE FROM ALL OF US. LOL. THIS IS NOT ILU OYINBO. WE WONT ENCOURAGE YOU TO CHASE A MAN. IT NEVER WORKS. EVEN OVER THERE, WHEN GIRLS CHASE, THEY USUALLY DONT GO WITH THE INTENT OF MARRIAGE. THEY GO WITH THE CHOP AND CLEAN MOUTH MENTALITY AND THAT MAKES THEM NOT DESPERATE WHICH GIVES THE FRIENDSHIP A CHANCE OF SURVIVAL. I DARE YOU TO SEND THE PROOF FOR STELLA'S EYES ONLY. HE HASN'T CONTACTED YOU YET. Anyways, here is my opinion, try to find out, from stalking him as you did earlier, if you have a considerable percentage of what he also wants in a woman. If you don't, then don't even proceed to be friends with him. How do you even know you're his type. Ole! You're only attracted to his package. Meanwhile, all that glitters is not gold dear. The grass, they say, is always greener on the other side. Let's say you match up considerably, you may stand a chance but I still have a bad feeling. There's no feeling better than a man chasing you, I tell you. He sounds too good to be true to be unattached. He's either a player or really has high standards which you trying to meet might be a suicide mission. He may even have baggages(spiritual, health etc), who knows? Honestly, I'm going to say this once. Forget this guy. What is doing you is what they call ojukokoro. Wait for your own. I pray you the spirit of discernment when he comes though, cos you'll most likely feel too big for him.
ReplyDeleteAnoy 18:21 don't conclude she is lying. Not everyone is strong enough for the way some bvs insult here in the name of advice. I guess she is just happy the guy DM her first and probably saw it after sending in her Chronicle.
DeleteThank you Yemi. We are saying the same thing. She probably does not have liver to with stand the backlash. I only assumed however. But it would've been nicer if she was the one who responded to me like she has been impatiently responding to others. It is psychology. She knows I was right. I am not judging her in anyway though.
DeleteWow. You sound so angry at her for what? For having a crush? Babe hasn't even slid into his dm
DeleteWow. You sound so angry at poster for having a crush? She hasn't even slid into his dm yet, she is still asking our opinion and you're sounding like she committed a crime. You don't want the story to be that the guy likes her back and contacted her and happy ever after. You want her love to be unrequited so you'll sneer 'i told you so' and be right that 'it never works'. I have a friend like you who believes it never works, so much that when it works for someone she stays waiting for how long it will last..like waiting for their break up just to be right. That's just wrong.
DeleteAnonymous Lie detector
DeleteYou too detect lie ..everything na lie
Las Las you go need deliverance
This poster is quite out of place here.
ReplyDeleteYou should be a bit patient to allow people air their views..... it’s not a one man show here
If you didn’t want anybody to comment, you shouldn’t have posted your write up here.
I see your are not tolerant to comments from persons who hold a divergent view to yours.
I wish you luck on your journey.
You've spoken my mind.
Deleteo my God! i dey feel u menhhh anon 15:19
ReplyDeletewhy are u shouting? u are sounding like somebori who is interested in d same man. calm down, it may not be d same person. there are so many handsome, God fearing and IT workers out there. relax biko
ReplyDeleteIf I was you, I will DM him with hello you look familiar, you graduated from so so school, I guess our were my senior. I also finished from same school, so so department. Nice to meet you here
ReplyDelete*If I were you*
ReplyDeleteUpon all your hotness, you're the one chasing a guy and you claimed to be hot. I doubt if you have brain at all, if you have brain, you shouldn't be the one running men just go be noticed.
ReplyDeleteHahahahaha don no dey play with una at all at all
DeleteBabe shoot your shot with style .I fid shoot my shot .Ehen we got married march 29th .I dnt rver agree i was the one that started the greenlight sef when we gist😀😀If you want a screenshot i will happily send hkw i started the conversation. please please sisters shoot ur shot oh no dull ya sef
ReplyDeleteI like it when the poster respond to all comments, the reason is because it makes the comments lively. Many times here we are left to wonder what happened after. But many of you are acidic sha! Poster please let us know the next level. I love one comment here, the one that says when a girl hit first, she goes to chop and clean 👄 Yes! I support that because you already know the man is coming with chop and clean mouth too. I did here in Yankee because of paper and run away late. Though some guys really fall genuinely, but the thought of hitting first will not allow you t enjoy the relationship. The best is to enjoy while it last.
ReplyDelete