STAND ALONE NARRATIVE
HELPING OTHERS WITH ONES BAD EXPERIENCE
Hello Stella,
I’m not sure where this fits- Chronicle, IHN or if it belongs anywhere on this blog but it’s quite a long read, do pardon.
My name is Ehi and I have been an avid reader since 2015. Sometime in 2014, I sent in a chronicle at a very puzzling time after I wound up pregnant from a quite brutal rape and I was very confused on whether to keep the baby as I didn’t have any type of support. I didn’t mention this part then but I had just run away and escaped from my traffickers in the UK and the rape happened the second night after I got back into Nigeria by someone I trusted to keep me safe as I didn’t have anywhere else to live.
I didn’t have any savings too because they took my passport/ documents from me so I could not work but I managed to gather money to fly back when one of my tutors slipped my name into summer employment specifically for that purpose. I did report the matter to the UK police with evidence including recordings I secretly made but they termed it a ‘domestic matter’ and so they didn’t interfere. My brother in-law is white and a British citizen. The Nigerian consulate didn’t even bat their eye my way.
My rapist and I had known each other years before. We were friends and he knew what I had been going through in the UK and had assured me I could take refuge with his family. On why I didn’t have anywhere to stay in Nigeria? Well, the traffickers are my own family- mother, sisters and brother inlaw and no, I wasn’t lured with something as bogus as a promise of work overseas. It was a carefully thought out plan. I was young and excited about furthering my education, coming back to Nigeria to increase my chances of finding a good job and that was what I was promised, Education!.
My rapist and I had known each other years before. We were friends and he knew what I had been going through in the UK and had assured me I could take refuge with his family. On why I didn’t have anywhere to stay in Nigeria? Well, the traffickers are my own family- mother, sisters and brother inlaw and no, I wasn’t lured with something as bogus as a promise of work overseas. It was a carefully thought out plan. I was young and excited about furthering my education, coming back to Nigeria to increase my chances of finding a good job and that was what I was promised, Education!.
Fees were paid, the whole 9 yard and so it all seemed very legit. I won’t go into the nitty-gritty but it has happened, time has passed, many waters have flown, I am healing, lessons have and are being learnt and yes, I did keep the child. I must say, I’m quite grateful for those experiences, they have shaped me.
I have gone through the rigors and harm of whatever experiences like this would bring to my psychological wellbeing and I am the better for it but like I mentioned, I am still learning and hence, the reason for emailing. I am looking to work with women (and men) who have experienced or are experiencing trafficking of any form or kind. I am from Edo state in Nigeria and I want to use my experience and that of anyone else willing, to help other people, especially women as they are more exposed to it. I want to go to rural settlements and communities where they do not know any better or have the luxury of the mediums to learn of the dangers that desperation can expose them to.
I have gone through the rigors and harm of whatever experiences like this would bring to my psychological wellbeing and I am the better for it but like I mentioned, I am still learning and hence, the reason for emailing. I am looking to work with women (and men) who have experienced or are experiencing trafficking of any form or kind. I am from Edo state in Nigeria and I want to use my experience and that of anyone else willing, to help other people, especially women as they are more exposed to it. I want to go to rural settlements and communities where they do not know any better or have the luxury of the mediums to learn of the dangers that desperation can expose them to.
The ‘abroad mentality’ and s#x trafficking is quite rife in my part of the country where I hope to begin my awareness. Going abroad to get a better life is great but just make sure you don’t become so desperate that you are blinded. There is nothing as peaceful as going within the confines of set regulations. I have a few ideas to use to teach these communities and I have already begun to gather research and contacts as well.
I am not asking for financial gains , I just want willing participants (ones who might have experienced or are experiencing trafficking) and even NGOs that would love to work with me. This is not for profit, it is a cause I’ve come up with to help people, learn from and grow in. With drive and encouragement, I am sure this will save someone. I currently live and work in Lagos state.
I am not asking for financial gains , I just want willing participants (ones who might have experienced or are experiencing trafficking) and even NGOs that would love to work with me. This is not for profit, it is a cause I’ve come up with to help people, learn from and grow in. With drive and encouragement, I am sure this will save someone. I currently live and work in Lagos state.
Anyone interested or who has been down this lane can contact me for the posters contact via email...thanks.
Well done Ehi............
It is well with you my sister.....may the lord continue to bless and strengthen you.
ReplyDeleteEducation and information are the tools in which a society is been saved from destruction. Kudos on this path you have chosen to walk on and enlighten the people. I pray you get the necessary assistance you seek for.
ReplyDeleteWhen u mentioned ‘brutal rape’, all I shuddered to imagine such a nasty experience. May God continue to perfect alll there is to u!... #NoToRape
ReplyDelete#EndHumanTrafficking
hmmm God help you and may you heal completely.
ReplyDeleteYou can as well collaborate with bv Libyan returnee
Well done babe. That part of Nigeria really need people like you to enlighten them.
ReplyDeleteEmu, ubiaja etc. their parents sell them out without considering the dangers. It’s well.
Nawa o. How can someone subject his/her fellow human being to such nonsense? It still baffles me how people willingly sell their own into slavery. May God give you strength my sister.
ReplyDeleteYour own family set you up?
ReplyDeleteThank God for His strength upon your life and for making you a blessing to your generation. I'm so happy that you are using your experience to make lives better out there.
Yes they did. It was hard then but all has been forgiven and we are finding our way to the light in small steps. I bear no grudge and thank you for your words
DeleteThank God for you poster.i lived in Edo state (Benin city for years) and I will tek you that trafficking especially sending their female relatives and friend abroad for prostitution is mostly their means of living.very bad.It is one of their lucrative family business.They need total cleansing
ReplyDeletenice one Ehi and i pray God will give you the strenth to fight.
ReplyDeleteAmen
DeleteAmen! This was once my passion until I got derailed by life and its challenges. I am from Edo State BTW and a proud Bini indigene.
DeleteI am available to pursue this with you but I live in Benin ATM,
I’ll email my details to SDK,
Kudos.
God will strengthen u n bring people dat will favour u...Amen
ReplyDeleteI hope there is no one suffering from mental illness in this write up
ReplyDeleteAdmittedly, I suffered trauma but it is that which has led me to find answers and healing through this journey. If a doctor diagnosed mental illness, it isn't medical prescriptions that would heal me, it is me that would heal me. This is where and how I choose to heal. By helping another
DeleteEhi dalu -thanks for writing.
ReplyDeleteNaija girls go hear about this one. In their minds, "abroad" -is heaven and Nigeria is "hell".
Tufiakwa! Once them hear "abroad", even the married ones go begin get fiances come dey offload
them husbands osiso osiso -quick quick.
Thanks Ehi for keeping the innocent child who did not rape you ma ncha!
I won't be surprised the Naija girls I know will come on comment section to attack you and
call you all kinds of names wey them don call me. Some go even say "Ehi" fit be my "many IDs"
whosai!😏😏😏😏😏😏😏😏😏😏
I go dey yarn my truthful yarns. To shoot commot is to them like pass urine.
Innocent human blood dey like urine to some of them.
Ngwanu, ndi (veteran attackers) shoot!
oops na shoot at my smooth nyansh o. I no mean make una shoot off.
😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊
I'm your No 1 fan.
DeleteHUGS
Cheers..
Apart from being raped: Abortion is the next worst thing that can happen to any girl.
ReplyDeleteThe guilt and hopelessness is out of this world.
Happy to read that you prevailed.
I pray you find people who are genuinely interested in working with you.amen
ReplyDeleteGood one. May God give you all you need to realise this dream.
ReplyDeleteThis is a topic quite dear to me . I just sent Stella a mail, I hope to work with you.
ReplyDeletemore grace
ReplyDeleteNice one poster
ReplyDeleteI love your guts
ReplyDeleteMay God directs the right individual to you.
Good things shall locate you.
I love that you love my guts 😏 and Amen to your prayers
DeleteGod bless and keep you ehi. and may God use you to be a succor to those going through this same ordeal.
ReplyDeleteAmen, Amen, Amen
DeleteI am from edo state and it’s so sad to admit but a lot of young girls are still tripping to go to that abroad for prostitution. This isn’t hear say it’s something my landlady is pushing her daughter to go do. They have been duped once by agents but that wasn’t stopping them from trying another agent. I left the house so I dnt know how far with them anymore.
ReplyDeleteWhen we asked the lady why she wants her daughter to travel by all means, she said and I quote “no be only me get toto for this house, make she sef go use her Toto help us.”
My sisters, roommates and I all tried to speak with the daughter who is about 20 or 22 yrs (so you won’t say she’s a kid) about what her mom is trying to do to her, but she wasn’t even interested, as far as she was concerned, we were jealous of her cause she’s traveling abroad and we are still killing ourselves going to classes.
Don’t even get me started on her male kids. Hmm, we had to move out of there immediately our rent expired.
You see some parents, terrible beings.
Thank God for his mercies upon you. You may consider going into partnership with the National Youth Service Corps. They have a program for the girl child in rural communities.
ReplyDeleteThank you so much Stella, thank you. Thank you all so very much. This is really encouraging.
ReplyDeleteGood one
ReplyDeletePlease tell,if they send their daughters out as prostitute ,what will their sons be doing?
ReplyDeleteI'm very impressed poster, may God bless, keep you and provide for you in this noble undertaking.
ReplyDelete