Hmmmmm....
STAND ALONE NARRATIVE
SERIOUS ADVICE NEEDED
It started off smoothly, no gbenshing et all. We were cool chatting, calling and visiting each other while talking about future. Then boom, the guy stopped communicating. I would call but no answer. I sent chats same thing. Then, one day he sent me a message that he's busy that he would call me when he is less busy.
I was relieved atleast he was okay. Few weeks later, he called that he was going to the abroad to work bla bla bla and went blank again.
Few weeks later, he reached out to me that things didn't go well as he had planned and he came back to naija. He wants me back but I have totally erased whatever emotional attachment I had for him. Reason is simple, I felt that if all he had planned worked for him, he wouldn't have reached out to me again.
Now my friend is telling me that I am too hard on him bla bla. That I should give him another chance.
Please my people, did i over react? Is my decision okay?
I need sincere answers please.
*Hmmmmmm this doesnt sound good at alll....I dont believe he travelled anywhere..Tell him to show you the visa he travelled with and if he was deported...until he explains his disappearance and appearance,dont give him another chance....
Babes he dumped you before, probably because of another girl. If you accept him back he will dump you again.
ReplyDeleteIf you go back to him, that means you do not respect yourself, so his disrespect will never stop.
DeleteJust respect yourself, treat yourself with the dignity you deserve and stay on your lane. You are more than an option, allow him to leave.
Exactly....let him remain out.
DeleteYou didn't overreact and your decision is okay. He still gonna vamoose suddenly again. As his girl,you are supposed to be carried along with his travelling plans if truly the plan didn't work. Your friend can go for him if she truly cares;awon alagborodun
DeleteHe's not loyal at all. Things won't be so complicated if we communicate in honesty.
DeleteI don't think you were ever his girl.Runoooo baby run!
DeleteHe ddnt travel!
DeleteHe dumped u!
Dnt take him back!
Let him stay out my dear.
DeleteSo your emotions ended just like that?!
ReplyDeleteMadam, you never loved him, at least not romantically.
Maybe you liked the idea of being his lady, but you really didn't want it.
Let things be, for both your sakes.
She should lose her No 6 cuz she is in love and not think straight? What happened to sharing his plans with her? So if he plans to travel in future he will go quiet on her again?
DeleteAbeg let him be, doesn't deserve a second chance, you are his option B or second fiddle.If he was serious about you, he won't behave that way.
Candor, by your reasoning, the dude didn’t love her either. If he did, he wouldn’t just up and leave the relationship and the country without letting her know during the planning or factoring her into his plans for the future. How did his own love just die like that?
DeleteIf that’s the case, why go back to a girl you don’t love?
Some of you just think playing the devil’s advocate makes you sound intelligent.
😒
Poster. I hope you read yesterday’s chronicle. Don’t go back to a confused fellow who feels he knows clearly what he wants but is looking for someone whose time he will waste before eventually settling down with his “lovely wife”.
Sometimes, the disappointments we experience in life are blessings in disguise.
Candor, how should her emotions have ended? With a mental breakdown? You might be the type to 'run hekter sekters' over relationships, but please, not everyone has the time for such!
DeleteHim on his part, does he assume the relationship is a light bulb that you switch off and on whenever you desire?
Dumping is sorry ass is a very beautiful thing sweetheart...
Dude is not loyal, he's not in love.
ReplyDeleteHe is the type that is good as a side boo or string him along.
Side boo is too much of an exulted position for such an asswipe!
DeleteThis is the type you use to run errands, pay some bills, handle tasks, you know just a general handyman and when he's done, you pat him on the back.
Kai Mama mia, you're a 'terrible' sombori. hahahaha
DeleteThat dude just came and used his ruler to measure you and discovered that
ReplyDelete"without abroad or plenty money" you will
jump ship immediately you see any of those. So na im make im waka try vanish abroad.
Good to know that you no spread legs yakata for am (hope say no be Pharisee yarns o😊😊😊 ).
So, hear from the dude, why the sudden blank out and "blank in" (no be oyibo be dis o). Tell am say, so if he finds an abroad baby who will
give him papers, he to vanish okwa ya?
Just siddon dey watch am for now.
Are you ok? Seriously, are you sure that you are ok? @ your first paragraph, is that all you could deduce from her narrative?
DeleteWhen I tell you that you have a problem somewhere I mean it and it's very obvious.
@JOycilicioux
DeleteSo how come you always come to read the comments of a "lady that is not okay?"
You ended up not giving her any piece of advice while I did?
So who is not okay and has a problem somewhere?
Ajuju
😊😊😊😊
No matter how busy people are, if they truly loves you and want you in their life, they will always make time for you even in their thight schedule. I will advice, don't continue with him. What's the possibility he won't ghost you again?
ReplyDeleteWell said Teejay, this one will still ghost you, very unreliable selfish goat.
DeleteThank you 👍🏿
DeleteYou obviously know your worth. You are not tooo harsh. If everything had worked he would still not be calling u. I do not think he's the one.
ReplyDeleteIn this harsh economy, local man is thinking about his future Aunty.
ReplyDeleteStop being hard on a brother and give him a break.
Have you even bothered to ask him how he's faring? Do you know the difficulties local man might be going through?
His world doesn't revolve around you Aunty.
Aunty, it simply means he doesn't see you in his future,you are only good for his while waiting present. Pls carry urself with dignity and wait for a man that sees not only his future with you, but also his eternity.
DeleteAsk him how he's faring? I forgot she's his mum. 🙄
DeleteNo oo.. yeye local man shouldn't have thought about the future, he should've waited for her to do the thinking for him. Nonsense!
Did he care how she'd fared & felt when he went incommunicado? I dislike people who just go ghost on their friends.
Whatever difficulty he's going thru is non of her business. Afterall, he didn't carry her along., so he should bear his cross alone.
Her world also does not revolve around ill-mannered, baby-men.
Bro.
He didn't think about the harsh economy when he resigned from his job to chase shadow. It has nothing to do with the economy but rather he felt he had hit a jackpot hence his attitude.
DeleteHe didn’t think of economy before asking a girl out yeah?
DeleteThis guy way no pure at all. He met someone better who obviouslydumped his behind. So now he's back to you. He will never respect you if you take him back. It shows you don'have an option. To him, he left came back without prior notice and you still single and waiting to take in back. Like in his eyes it's like you don'have men wooing you. This kind of guy in a relationship with will be emotionally unavailable. Hope you never sleep with him? If after all our advice you decide to take him back, keep one eye open.
ReplyDeleteAll the signs are there.
ReplyDeleteYou are the side piece.
He will beg like his life depends on you.
Later you'll see card
True. Na dem.
DeleteNansense..men be thinking d world revolves around them...don't mind him joor,let ur heart guide u
ReplyDeleteMe no trust this kind guy o.
ReplyDeleteIt's either he's up to something, hes not telling you the truth.Hes hiding things from you.
Moreover he doesn't look too serious to me.
Have a serious talk with him
If you can get him to
Your friend is making excuses for him, don't fall for it.
ReplyDeleteIf you feel like he is stringing you along, he probably is and you already know this.
Keep yo head up, sis.
Perxie where hast thou been ???
DeleteWell I know you've things to take care of ... wishing you success .
Thank you, anon baibay. Hope you good?
DeletePoster, please find out why he's behaving like that first, he maybe married and hiding it from you...
ReplyDeleteGbam! The red ink has your answer!!!
ReplyDeleteBut even with all those evidences, you need to treat yourself with dignity and not accept the tacky treatment he gave you. You can just let him go, that disrespect was too much, you shouldn't get used to such.
I believe your inner mind is telling you something. That's the truth. Listen to it and forget your friends advice.afterall it's not all friend that wants our happiness.
ReplyDeleteRUN! RUN!! RUN FOR YOUR LIFE & FUTURE!!!
ReplyDeleteI beg leave Stella’s advice, your own reason is more valid. You did the right thing
ReplyDeleteSomething doesn’t seem right about the guy. Probably he left you for another girl and came back after he was done with her
ReplyDeleteBabe!! Dude went to get married. Maybe, maybe not. 🤷
ReplyDeleteOr he probably thought involving you in his travel plans may bring ill-luck. Either ways, you deserve better. Dump him like the time waster he is!
Pls don’t give him a second chance. You are his alternative!
ReplyDeleteStick to your decision, dont mind your friend.
ReplyDeleteI am the poster. I will answer some of the questions raised. Stella, he actually traveled to the abroad. Like I said his plans didn't work out for him the reason why he came back.
ReplyDeleteHe resigned his job for the unknown because it was an abroad job.
Poster you don't need to go back, I sent a similar chronicle here some times ago, with all the advice given, I was still trying to see defend him and see that maybe it was situation that kept him away from me. After getting back with him, he still ghost me for no reason again, it now dawn on me I was the one who thought he were in love with me, I was shattered , I regretted I could have left earlier.
DeleteOh now that his plans didn't work, he remembers you? Dude is a joker jare, alainikanse.
DeleteSit and have a conversation
DeleteIt’s possible he thought he was doing you a favour by ghosting
Maybe he didn’t want to string you along because he didn’t know how abroad will work out
Madame pls don't accept that guy back. Any guy that blank one anyhow he likes is not worth d stress.if he was successful, do u think he will still remember u?pls be wise!cos d next time he will leave u,u won't like it.
DeletePoster if he had told you to move on before he left, it would have been a different case. But he just straight out went cold on you. I don’t know about you but to me, that’s not a good sign.
Deletefollow Stella's advise and see things fr yourself, i don't believe him at all. The guy had better relationship than you and he was only using you as option B, when a man blank and come back after some times it means he was seeing someone he love, care, serious with than you.
ReplyDeletewalk away and allow your despirate frined to be with this guy. the guy will still blank you after some time.
No matter how busy a man or woman is, they will always have time for someone after their heart.
ReplyDeleteHe blanked you period!!!!!
Stick to what your mind is telling you, and by the way your friend is not a good adviser.
ReplyDeleteHe LIED to you and will lie again. Delete him from your recycle bin.
ReplyDeleteAbort Ship!!! Relationships are mostly about communication, if he can comfortably stay AWOL, my dear next please. Cheers!
ReplyDeleteDarling, if you want an honest advice, you have to be honest as well. No need to act all stoic and badass because you are obviously not. If you were, we wouldn't be reading this. Secondly, you can't just wish away emotions, especially if they are genuine. Sweetie, it's okay to be vulnerable, it's okay to admit that a guy hurt your feelings. You are human after all, no?
ReplyDeleteWhy was he ignoring your calls and chats for days? If a guy is really into you, no matter how busy he is, he will certainly call you back immediately he is less occupied, usually the same day, apologise and explain why he couldn't take your calls. A guy who can ignore you that long and when he eventually reaches out, he does so by sending you a message to say he is busy and would call when he is less busy? Are you kidding? Plus you felt relieved? No, darling, the dynamics of your relationship is wrong.
Honey, how did you present yourself to this guy? Did you even allow him work hard to get your attention? You did or said something to make him feel you are at his beck and call. He is so full of himself and has the impression that he can ignore for days and make contact whenever and you will be grateful that he FINALLY reached out, like he is doing you a favour. How insulting! This dude isn't scared of losing you. It's not about not having sex, it's about how you carry yourself. You can keep your thighs tightly together and still lose your value if you make a man feel your world revolves around him.
I was raised to see myself as a Queen and not to allow any man treat me any less. Once a guy starts acting up, he is out on the first thing smokin'. Darling, I don't care if he shows you proof that he travelled out, he has no excuse for the way he treated you. Even if he travelled, it's more offensive because had things worked out for him, he would have left you high and dry. He is only coming back to you because he has always considered you one of several options. Perhaps a plan "F", for all we know. Say a hard "NO" to being anyone's sloppy second.
You underreacted, as far as I'm concerned, because you ought to have ended things and nursed your wounds way before now. This guy feels you will always be available and he can treat you the way he likes with little or no consequences. Your decision will say a lot about you and the value you place on yourself.
e-hugs and kisses.
Run run run...away
ReplyDeleteMy 2nd boyfriend did this to me years ago at the 3rd disappearance I dated another immediately to avoid taking my ex back.Today that other guy is my husband. You can give him another chance but don't put all your eggs a basket.
ReplyDeleteGirl, you're not overreacting. You were not in the initial plan.
ReplyDeleteNo need for second chance, I will do exactly what you did
Poster pls ignore him. I seriously doubt his intentions towards you for not letting you in on his travel plans. It just doesn't add up.
ReplyDeleteHe never travelled at all...he is so unreliable ...cut him off
ReplyDeleteBabe run.
ReplyDeleteHe's shown you who he is, believe him
One of the most nasty breakups is having to figure out by yourself that you are no longer wanted.No reason,no explanation,just blanking... This guy has shown you just a small glimpse,you are not being to hard on him... Ignore your friend for your own good. It will be you facing the music when you heart is broken
ReplyDeleteWhen a man loves you, he will NEVER purposely go days or weeks without hearing from you. He has shown you who he really is and the way he feels about you, you better believe him.
ReplyDelete100% with you on this Stella!
ReplyDelete