Raising a point of order on personal explanation, Ndume said he was absent from the morning session of Thursday’s sitting, because of an event meant for the collection of his daughter’s dowry.
He said the event later ‘translated into a ‘brief’ marriage ceremony.
“ The parent of the person that wants my daughter in marriage brought dowry to indicate interest. I didn’t know it would translate into marriage,” he said.
Ndume said he decided to explain his absence so that his colleagues will not be offended, that he did not not announce the marriage of his daughter in line with the tradition of the Senate.
From Daily Trust
*Bride price collection should be abolished abeg..I know so many women still trying to return bride price whilst the man has moved on and remarried......The System does not favour women a all!
Stella as muslims we (females) donot return brideprice when the marriage packs up. Instead, you just move out of the husband's house.
ReplyDeleteLoud it please!
DeleteAbolish your side. Ours isn’t cultural it’s Islamic principle and we are happy with it
Oh this is lovely
DeleteThere is actually a difference between Islam as a religion and culture...but I think Hausa tribe always take there culture as a religion..some other Islamic tribes in Africa don’t collect dowry.
DeleteAnon 22:35. Speak of what you know. Dowry is part of Islam and not culture.
DeleteEach to his own,I am an enlightened woman but I don't support abolishing bride price biko;it should only be reduced in places where they are exorbitant and returned to the court if the man refuses to have it back
ReplyDeleteYou are so right. We don't have to westernize everything. Only those that put all their poverty in a daughter's dowry should be checked. Dowry is a tradition and not all traditions are bad.
DeleteThe bride price amount is set by the girl's father mainly. His kinsmen will request the amount the are asked to. My father told them before hand he wanted 5k only as he wasn't selling his daughter but needed to collect the money as tradition demanded and that was the amount they collected. Hubby felt uneasy because it wasn't what he was expecting to hear and gave them 50k, they took 5k and returned the rest to him. There is no need to abolish it. The official amount of bride price in my place in Anambra state, if the man is also from same town is 17 naira. If he is from outside, then the father can demand whatever he wants.
DeleteWell in the north the bride price is not returned. When the marriage ends, it ends. No returning of bride price required
ReplyDelete100k is too much o. A lil fraction should be reconsidered.
ReplyDeleteStella bride price abolished in Africa? E go hard o.
The surprise written all over this dog's face is surprising me.
ReplyDeleteBride price paying does not equal to the woman becoming the man's property.
ReplyDeleteThose women that their bride price has not been returned or accepted by the ex husband's knows where to go.
Those are one of the reasons for customary courts..
Take the money or whatever it is that was accepted as the bride price.
I do not support the abolishment of bride price payments...
😘😘😘😘
DeleteSometimes you dey make sense die.
Ms A, as much as I'll love to make sense of this your comment ehn. The gbagahun would not let us both be great. E too much, kilode!
DeleteStella in this case,it favours them.
ReplyDelete100k is biscuit money for she and her dad.
And no! Bride price should not be abolished. It should simply be reduced for the 'have nots'.
Bride price is compulsory in Islam. But it shouldn't be too much.
ReplyDeleteWhatever systems does not serve the greater good of all the people should be abolished.
ReplyDeleteI've not heard of anyone returning bride price where I come from. Maybe because it's just 25naira. Bride price should not be abolished biko. It should be reduced.
ReplyDeleteWhere's your place please? Thought you're Efik
DeleteThose people "trying to return bride price..."are the greedy folks.
ReplyDeleteIt is just a token and they shouldn't levy the man to death. If they levied
a reasonably affordable amount, will they be "trying to return bride price...".
A lot of girls also pride themselves in "how much was paid for me..."
My parents told my husband's people to "pay anything they wish ..." as bride price.
Greed is evil and that is what makes a lot of men treat their wives as one of the property
that they bought!
A virtuous woman is invaluable and no man can ever pay for a (virtuous) woman.
Christ the bridegroom of the Church did so:
Acts 20:28 Keep watch over yourselves and all the flock of which the Holy Spirit has made you overseers.
Be shepherds of the church of God, which he bought with his own blood.
Bride price is part of our culture, our race, our people. It can be reduced in states where it is outrageous, but not abolished. I love our cultures.
ReplyDeleteStella, abolish all your German cultures and traditions before you think of abolishing our cultures and traditions. We are unique. Every society has its unique cultures that cannot be rationalized. Keep your opinion to yourself.
ReplyDeleteMine was 25naira... If fuck up enter he marriage, send the man 100 call card, he can keep the change.😎😎😎
ReplyDeleteLol! Action lady.
DeleteStella the new format way now is if the man refuses to come and collect the bride price back. The bride family will take the money to court and announce to the man whether he is ready he should go to court and collect his money and the woman is free.
ReplyDeleteBride price should NEVER BE ABOLISH. That's the first sign that shows that both the man and woman are married follow by traditional marriage and extra adding of white wedding. It has been there and it will continuing to be there.
ReplyDeleteIn Igbo culture, the man doesn't have to be present before the bride price can be returned. Neither does the woman.
ReplyDeleteIn my village, the woman's family (kinsmen) takes the bride price to the man's family with a keg of sour palm wine to signify that the marriage has gone sour. That's all. No man can force you to remain in a marriage because he doesn't want to collect the bride price.
On a related note, it is important to note the difference between bride price and customary rites. The rites usually entail buying some items required for the marriage ceremony. Igbo people call it the marriage List. This list is set by the community (or traditional ruler) and contrary to public opinion, the bride's father doesn't fix the list. However, he can make it cheaper by forfeiting some of his rights on the list or haggling with his kinsmen to waive some.
The actual bride price is next to nothing and is always immaterial so it can always be returned if the marriage ends. The lady is not required to refund the money spent on the rites, only the bride price.
I hope this clarifies.
Returning bride price isn't as difficult as some may think. In some cases, the man may not accept but that doesn't mean the woman isn't free. Some would tell the partner to spend it on the offspring(s) if any or use it themself.
ReplyDeleteTo think of it, the amount for bride price is no where near what are spent on refreshments and entertaining people (some who might come with their gossips, witches and otumokpo against the couple) during marriage.