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Sunday, January 19, 2020

Sunday In House Gists - Funny Things Kids Say And Do...

Kids are the Best Comedians and the things they say and do is proof of this.....








 Is it the questions they ask or the things they do?

A Lady gisted me that her little daughter was seen kissing the wall and when asked what she was doing she said they should ask the house girl....House girl was asked and she said she does not know what it meant.....Little was called to re-enact the scene and she said she was practising how to be an adult!....lol

One of my Bambinos asked me if i married as a Virgin and my mouth dropped open...Its been months and i am yet to answer but he is still asking me cos he needs the answer to finish his argument in school with his friends......๐Ÿ˜‚
I tell am say we dey forbid to answer such questions in my Country and he tells me that he checked google and nothing like that....heheeheheheheheheh


Any funny thing from your end?Maybe your kids or relatives kids or neighbours kids did or said something?

Lets gist!!!

106 comments:

  1. One married Naija girl was on phone telling someone that she likes "blowjob" more than the do.
    Na so 5 year old girl come ask the mama wetin blowjob mean. Mama jaw drop o. ๐Ÿ˜ฎ๐Ÿ˜ฎ๐Ÿ˜ฎ Mama talk say they sell am for shops.
    Na so papa return and girl come ask papa make im buy blowjob for her.
    "I heard mommy telling her friend that it is sweeter" ๐Ÿ˜ฎ๐Ÿ˜ฎ๐Ÿ˜ฎ
    My Naija Sisis, make una dey do all una phone runs in front of ya kids o, unu anugo?.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hmmm,ANG! No perfect story from ya end?

      Delete
    2. @14:25
      See me see wahala o
      Which one be perfect story again o.
      You be perfect sisi, dude abi na sisi-dude? ๐Ÿ˜ฎ๐Ÿ˜ฎ๐Ÿ˜ฎ

      Delete
    3. When my daughter was a in kindergarten, she took my phone to school, her class teacher asked her why she brought the phone to school, she told her that it's because I beat.
      I only spank her because she did something wrong that morning, I never knew she planned a pay back๐Ÿคฃ๐Ÿคฃ๐Ÿคฃ๐Ÿคฃ

      Delete
    4. I forgot to carry gas cylinder on my way out and my kid sis suggested that we borrow Jerry can to buy the gas and fill at home... I laugh tire that day...

      Delete
    5. I teach Primary 3 pupils and I taught them about Family last week. I gave examples of extended family,one of which was grandparents. One boy in my class persistently raised his hand up,shouting I,I. I finally pointed at him to talk and this boy said and I quote,' Another example of extended family is ancestors or forefathers. I just couldn't help it. I laughed my ass off in class

      Delete
    6. kids and their thinking. my 5 year son came back from one day and told me, " mummy i want a sister, i dont want another brother" (i have 2 boys). i replied him ok, just tell God. i never knew the boy was serious. One of his 2019 shilo request is God i want a sister.

      fews days back while sleeping, he woke up as if he was dreaming. As a mother you will ask what the problem was. he said bcos i dont have a sister. that was the day i know this sister thing is no longer a joke. meanwhile hubby and i are not planning pregancy cos we want to leave Naija by end of the year. how can i be preganat and relocating.

      Delete
    7. My three year old son came to me on boxing day and said"daddy! i want spirit, ehn! spirit ke, i was shocked because i had just taken from the bottle of vodka i kept on the fridge, i told him no but he wouldn't bulge, he kept crying and pointing to the fridge, ah! how did you know it is called spirit? he pulled me to the fridge, opened it and pointed to the bottle of pepsi in the fridge and used his fist to hit his chest and said I want " naija naija spirit". i just started laughing.

      Delete
  2. I'm too tired to type. If I start, chi ga eji, chi ga abo.
    The one she just learnt is to wet my face with kisses whenever she commits an atrocity(ies).
    Ashe this morning before we went to church, she broke my eyeshadow, the contents scattered all over the tiles. When she noticed my angry mood, she hugged and started kissing every part of my face ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚
    Lemme read other people's experience jare, at least for comfort.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hahahahahahahahahahha.. Sense girl๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚

      Delete
    2. Hahahahah , Nwa nwere Uche.

      Delete
    3. This is so my son and he will add I will play with you and you are my friend on top I will just weak ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚

      Delete
    4. Thus happened in the late eighties. My Cousin went to visit another Sister, who had a three year old. My Cousin has a wig on all day. As they were about to retire for the night, Cousin’s wig fell down because she had pulled half of it out. My three year old Nephew said, “Auntie Titi, your head has fallen”
      Everyone there laughed so hard.

      Delete
    5. In their small minds they are using sense to calm you down

      Children will not Lee someone
      Lol

      Delete
    6. CFV i love it too, na my mumu button. Fan Nwannem, you know nau ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚. Chy, uche ya mara over. Anon 15:10, your son is the real MVP chai ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚ these kids eh. Anon 16:38 ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚ na real your head has fallen. Jet Li, I just tire for them, for their mind oh.
      Kids are the loveliest. May God bless all mothers and grant the desire of every woman who craves for a child(ren).

      Delete
  3. A little kid of about 9 years old once said I talk like a Gay!!!
    The thing shock me.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. My 3year old daughter woke up on Saturday morning and told her Dad she's tired of going to school. Her Dad asked her what she wants to be doing and she said 'watching nursery rhymes on Mum's laptop' Her father and I had a good laugh that morn. She never even start to go school sef.

      Delete
    2. He could be right ๐Ÿคท‍♀️

      Delete
  4. My son really wanted to be 5.he said 4 is boring, I asked how, he said 4 is just there. He asked how old am I? I said 36! And he said yesterday you were 35? I said yes, he said and day before yesterday you were 34? I said yes and he said by this weekend you will be 37 ๐Ÿ˜‚ and am still 4?๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚ why am I still one place, am not moving...his joy as he clocked 5 this January was out of this world

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. ๐Ÿคฃ๐Ÿคฃ๐Ÿคฃ๐Ÿคฃ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚he must be an interesting fellow

      Delete
    2. ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚ chei

      Delete

    3. ๐Ÿคฃ๐Ÿคฃ๐Ÿคฃ๐Ÿคฃ๐Ÿคฃ๐Ÿคฃ๐Ÿคฃ๐Ÿคฃ๐Ÿคฃ๐Ÿคฃ

      Delete
    4. ๐Ÿ˜†๐Ÿ˜†๐Ÿ˜†๐Ÿ˜†๐Ÿ˜†

      Delete
    5. ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚

      Delete
    6. Give him a hug for me
      Awww

      Delete
    7. Awwwww ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜˜๐Ÿ˜˜

      Delete
    8. Thanks guys...his dramas are really epic

      Delete
  5. My daughter said,mummy why is your breast big and my own is small?
    I told her that my breast is big because I am big and your breast is small because you are small but when you grow big,your breast will be big too,abi how I for say?

    ReplyDelete
  6. My Sister's kid likes biscuit, all types. One day they put indocid in biscuits and scattered in the kitchen for rats, she came back from school took the biscuits and ate after dusting off the indocid. Immediately my sister came in saw her eating the biscuits, she became panicky called the husband and the girl was taken to the hospital. The doctor examined her and said there is nothing to worry about, they should just give a her tin of milk. Immediately the little girl lying on the bed heard this she smiled. They bought a tin of milk, the father said they should give her half tin first, that was when the little five year old spoke, she said please I heard when the doctor said one full tin ooo. Everyone had to laugh including the father inspite of his anger.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Parents need to be careful and learn from this story pls.

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    2. I hope she got better? This story scared me o

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    3. Why use biscuit as bait? Parents need to be more careful. Thank God this didn't end badly.

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    4. If you have kids you really need to be careful. Tell them what is around them.. That's his one Drank kerosene because it is in Eva bottle. She almost died.

      Delete
  7. My mum gisted us how my elder sister use to have very sharp mouth as a child...when we female visitors she will start shouting Aje aje aje ti de,she was barely two years when it became too embarrassing as some guest dont find it funny,mum started locking her up in the room once she had a guess..she grew up to be very outspoken,confrontational and a non nonsense woman.

    ReplyDelete
  8. Hehehehehhehehehhe.... Blessingify was here ...
    Where can I get popcorn n coke?


    Happy Sunday people of God

    ReplyDelete
  9. my toddler likes watching cartoon while I watch African magic yoruba at times. when he's tired of watching, or wants to have his bath or do something else , he say"mummy come and watch your yoruba, when I'm done, you'll put it back..I laughed so hard the first time he said it

    one day his dad wanted watch ball and he started crying that he wanted to watch cartoon , so his dad let him watch, after like 30 mins, it was time to have his bath, he told his dad "daddy put it in ball, when I come back I'll watch cartoon, his dad was so surprised that he could reason that way....the kind of things that comes out from his mouth ehn, I'm always careful around him because most times he recounts all my activities to his dad

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hilarious! Actually most of them do this hehehehe. But I have an 8 year old niece that goes with the remote control anywhere she goes. Even when she's not watching, she wouldn't want anyone to change the channel. She once hid it in her panties.

      Delete
  10. My kids were playing football and the older boy had a long shot that nearly hit me, i shouted Jesus ! My baby said to me" Mum it's Dan. I looked at him and smiled. I replied "I know"

    ReplyDelete
  11. So my husband has warned me never to feed our baby swallow simply because he does not eat it while me is a lover of swallow.

    One weekend, my 4yr old niece came to spend the weekend with us while hubby was at work. She saw me feeding my baby swallow and said "I think uncle said you should not give Jasmine swallow" I shouted at her will you tell uncle? She kept quiet.

    When hubby returned that evening this girl ran to him and welcomed him with Uncle aunty gave Jasmine swallow and she was coughing coughing coughing.๐Ÿ˜‚ I shouted Excel WHEN? She said aunty lie lie be there lying until Jesus will catch you๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. your niece is an aproko in the making

      Delete
    2. Chimooooooo! ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚

      Delete
    3. ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚ umuaka g'egbu mmadu, inukwa until Jesus catch you

      Delete
    4. Rotfl...... Chai ooo. Very wise geh

      Delete
  12. I was dressing my three year old cousin when her older sister came in to ask her for the lip gloss their mom bought for them the previous day from a saloon; her aunt (their mom's sister asked her to bring it so she could use it) guess what madam said�� go and tell her I can't give because her lips are too and she would finish the lip gloss����

    ReplyDelete
  13. Have no strength to type. My niece and nephew are a dramatic especially my first niece.4 years old that talks like an adult. While pregnant she used to tell me to give birth to baby girl and after delivery I called her and told her it's baby boy and she changed it for me. She refused to come see me because according to her we agreed that I will give her a baby girl she will use to do shakara for her school mates especially a girl named purity(guess her mom also gave birth to a baby girl). Las Las since she set her eyes on my baby he's now his favorite. She calls him prince charming (her mom named him that tho). She eats food and keep some for my son. All her class mates, teacher and even church friends knows about prince charming.

    ReplyDelete
  14. Since I got my magnetic eyelashes and eyeliner, my 3 year old son has been attracted always trying to fiddle with them. At a point I ordered him to leave my room. Then he said to me, "mama I'm sorry, I won't play with your eyes again." I didn't know when I burst out laughing. This Sunday morning, as were preparing for church, he said to me, "mama let me see your eyes." After observing carefully for 10secs, he said, "your eyes are beautiful." ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚

    ReplyDelete
  15. My children once confronted me with a book i collected from General hospital when I was pregnant, it shows different sex styles, I don't know how they got it bcos I kept it very well. They ask me mummy is this what Daady do to u to have us? Come and see how I quickly collected d books from them , E gbami, how wld i answer such question .

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. ewoo..still find time to teach them some of these things before they become curious and ask outsiders

      Delete
  16. When i was a kid, my dad said i used to talk anyhow so one day a cripple man walked past us and i shouted "daddy why is that man walking like that" dad said the man heard and looked back but my dad apologized. I hope he didn't swear for me sha

    ReplyDelete
  17. My daughter is a drama queen. She talks like an adult @ almost 4. If I leave the house with hubby and come back alone...Next question I will hear is "mummy where is your husband? The first day she asked me that I laughed and laughed ehh. She can mimick her teacher in school ehh.. I get to know all that happened in her class just by watching her. But they said she's not outspoken in school....i just told the HM that she can't believe half of the things she does at home.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Just like my daughter too. She is almost 4 too. At home she is so outspoken and an turn the house upside down but at school, she is very quiet. I dont know why some kids are like that.

      Delete
    2. TGG, I guess they will over grow it with time. I love our outing....shes so calm. I prefer going out with her than staying at home ๐Ÿ™„

      Delete
  18. When my nephew was 3rs
    One day, his mum came back from work and in excitement took her bag and expected something for him as usual but didn't see anything.

    As she knelt down to pray, he took over and said "Father, thank you that mummy went to work and she came back and didn't buy anything for me, in Jesus name I pray, Amen"


    2nd scenario

    At 5yrs

    After the night prayer, while laying down with the caregiver and chatting, she observed that his mouth of smelling and she told him you didn't brush
    He told her " just manage me this night, I will brush in the morning"


    so many things he said that are surprising

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Inukwa manage mouth odour๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚

      Delete
  19. My son was around 5 years when he started blending his sounds to form words.
    I took him and his sister to the hospital and he was trying to read everything he sees.
    Written on the door of the doctor's office was
    Always use a Condom.
    He started reading and very loudly too.
    Al wa ys use a
    I was already praying he won't saying the next word.
    Every other wait ing patient were looking at us
    One grandma was daring my son with his eyes to read the next word.
    Wetin concern my boy

    He pronounced it very well CONDOM and loudly.
    I could feel everyone's eyes on us.
    Hoping it's over o!.
    The next loud question
    Mummy what is a Condom.?
    I didnt expect that. You can't just wave a question away. He won't stop asking.
    I just said the first thing that came to my head.
    It's a medicine for sick people.
    When it was our turn to see the Dr
    My son said to his sister the Dr will give you a Condom
    I fainted.
    Somehow he never remembered that word again. So no need to explain further.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hahahahaha๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚

      Delete
  20. I was dressing my three year old cousin when her older sister came in to ask her for the lip gloss their mom bought for them the previous day, from a saloon. Herr aunt (their mom's sister asked her to bring it so she could use it), guess what madam said, go and tell her I can't give her because her lips are too big and she would finish the lip gloss.

    ReplyDelete
  21. I still remember my nephew when he was 4yrs. He was find of clubbing the chair or dinning table and jumping down. The mother talked, shouted. Scolded and even bear bear him severally but he refused to stop. One day I came back from work to meet him sleeping by 7.00pm which was very unusual. I asked the mum what happened and she told me thst he jumped from the table as usual, missed his balance and hit his head on the ground. She said it wass very because he didn't open his eyes for some minutes before he finally was able to talk. He waa taken to hosp and treated. 2 hours later he woke up and I asked him what happened to him and he replied as follows " aunty, I jumped from the table and fell down. Nepa took light from this my eyes and later brought it back! I was shocked!

    Needless to say, he never jumped from the tabke again!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. ������������


      My own daughter at 1+ or thereabout, woke up in the middle of the night and called out to me from her room...

      She: mum
      Me: yes darling, how are you?
      She: mum I feel like crying, should I cry?
      Me: nne please don't cry, you hear?
      She: ok mummy, I won't cry.
      Me: thank you

      Behold, she didn't cry. She slept off

      Delete
    2. I cant stop laughing... tears are rolling down my cheeks

      Delete
  22. My sister backed her son when he was disturbing, the next thing she had was mummy back me very well so that i will not fall down.

    ReplyDelete
  23. The first time I read every single comment under a post.I enjoyed myself.I stopped at super mom. I will come back for more.

    ReplyDelete
  24. During the Ebola crisis, my friends son of 3, told one of her customers don't touch me with your Ebola hand ๐Ÿ˜ฑ. We were so embarrassed.

    ReplyDelete
  25. My son wants me to change his birth date from December to March. He says December is too far๐Ÿคฃ.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿคฃ๐Ÿคฃ

      Delete
    2. Lmao! The same way I feel November is too far! Don’t blame him jhor ๐Ÿคฃ๐Ÿ˜‚

      Delete
  26. My daughter:mummy how old are you.
    Mummy:6.
    Daughter;ahhhh how come you are big and I am small.
    Mom:because we have big 6 and small 6.
    Daughter;mummy lie lie,nothing like big 6 and s six,is it alphabets?
    Mom๐Ÿ˜ง, go and watch cartoon,,!๐Ÿ˜ข

    ReplyDelete
  27. In the past, most of our mothers married at a young age to our far older fathers. I never knew my 5 year old niece had observed that grandpa was far older than grandma.
    Whenever my father was sick, he always vomited and even wet and pooed on himself. My mother always cleaned up without complaining.
    One day my niece nicknamed "grandma" because she is wise beyond her years, asked my mother - " Grandma, why did you marry an old man?"

    ReplyDelete
  28. A man was telling us inside the car today that his son told him "Daddy you're not born again, he said his daddy should have joined the altar call. Reason is because his daddy still beats him.

    ReplyDelete
  29. Heheheheheheheheh funny comments... I was just laughing reading all through.
    ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚

    ReplyDelete
  30. Hilarious comments. You can't help but smile at their innocence ����

    ReplyDelete
  31. Hilarious comments. You can't help but smile at their innocence ๐Ÿ˜Š๐Ÿ˜Š

    ReplyDelete
  32. Lmao very hillarious

    ReplyDelete
  33. So I asked my sales girl one morning to help me drop my 7 years old girl at school, while I attend to one or two things at the shop. When she came back she was told me what transpired in the taxi
    Daughter: Tm, those your kids(4 and 9)
    did you give birth to them or you adopted them ?
    And everybody in the taxi just turn and looked at her.
    Tm: No answer
    I just laughed because am used to all her embarrassing questions.
    Tm to me: Aunty, when she gets back from school I will ask her what was on her mind for asking me such a question.

    ReplyDelete
  34. I'm reading the comments on my way home. My driver thinks I'm going crazy. I'm here laughing like a fool ๐Ÿ˜‚ ๐Ÿคฃ

    ReplyDelete
  35. My 6year old son saw my 2 months old baby crying and asked me why he was crying.
    Me: because he's tired
    Him: what is he tired of? Is he tired of sleeping,or tired of pooing, or tired of sucking
    breasts?
    I just weak.

    ReplyDelete
  36. My 3 year old daughter has been eating a little more than usual this days when I asked why she now likes eating much, she said "I want baby to come to my tummy like mummy's own" meanwhile, I'm pregnant o... I laugh tire

    ReplyDelete
  37. I can't help but write this. I take care of after school children. I have this 4 yrs old boy who returned from his school to after school which was a day to worker's day. He said his teacher told him May Ist is public holiday which means there is no schools for him. I explained that it is Worker's Day,that mum and daddy won't be going to the office. He responded "so my mom and dad will be working and working everywhere,I will want to be working everywhere like them" imagine his understanding of worker's day. We had a good laugh that day looking at the way he said it.

    ReplyDelete
  38. My son asked me for my home town and i told him my Husband's village, next I heard was " no mummy, where are you from when you were still a virgin.


    His dad spanked him and he came to me saying " mummy why did you say yes? You should have said no" I didn't understand what he was saying until he said "mummy you should have said no when daddy said will you marry me?"

    ReplyDelete
  39. My almost six years old son said that since i don't want to give birth to another baby after his brother,he has no choice than to marry Amanda his girlfriend tomorrow so that they will start giving birth to their own kids,and his junior brother said he will start drinking alot of water so that his breast will be big then he will breastfeed their baby, and that is how a bag of pure finishes in just a day.

    ReplyDelete
  40. Yesterday we came back from church, I was telling hubby that I will be attending evening programme in church when my 5 years old son said he will go with me. I told him no, that i don't have money for buy buy. That he would stay at home with his brithers and watch carton. He started begging and promising that i won't send money buying anything. I told him I know you very well, na this world you meet me. He added " mummy infact don't take your purse to church ". My hubby started laughing, i told him your warri sense no reach my own oo.

    ReplyDelete
  41. lol..going thru the very funny comments i remembered one incidence with my 3 year old by name Tiffany. It was bed time and as I had finished tucking her in the following convo ensued
    Daughter: I think i want to change my name
    Me: why? dont you like Tiffy?
    Daughter: I do but i want you to start calling me another name again
    Me: okay what name is that
    Daughter: miss America ! and she let out the funniest laugh i have ever seen.
    Lets say we all had a good laugh but I got thinking well i finally left her room like these kids...what could have been going on in her head? why miss America and not Miss Nigeria?

    ReplyDelete

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