Stella Dimoko Korkus.com: Mental Health Specialist Victoria Inyama Warns Single Mothers To Beware Of Men Who Use Women

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Thursday, April 16, 2020

Mental Health Specialist Victoria Inyama Warns Single Mothers To Beware Of Men Who Use Women

Former Nollywood actress Victoria Inyama is warning Ladies who fall prey to men who are calm and calculated.....








84 comments:

  1. Too many faworaja in the land o ladies.

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  2. Very true.Talking from experience.

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  3. Too much sense in what she wrote.

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    1. She is so right.

      I met one(Nigeria)in this UK, and I have not been with any man for 4 years.

      So, this man/boy is working, pay his bills and all that. And still complains not having money,about money paying to for his two kids to his ex's. He complains that he wants a new car, that his present one is giving him trouble...and all this complain is through text messages. I just behaved that I did not see it.
      Then he will reply that I don't read messages that he sent.

      When he came visiting (he has never met my kids though), I shower him with care and all that.In return he just eat and sit and watch TV. If I tell him to pick me up at a place, he complains that I did not tell him on time. Sometimes, he try to take take money from me. But, never gave it to him.

      This men/boy are smooth talk, never want a committed relationship. So, one day , he said he want to see me.I turn it down on many occasion. He got upset and started with insults words through text. I never insult him back, but told him to watch his tongue.


      To God be the Glory, I have found the most amazing Liberian man(got a 15 years old daughter) now, who work in the same field with me. Love and care for me, Take me and my children as a package. Spend a lot on my kids and share the word of God together. He work in another city .My son always want to see him.

      Single mum should be very careful of men/boys, most especially in this abroad.

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  4. She is right. One nearly finish my friend with fuck. At first he was so calm sweet like an angel. He accepted her children and even said she should be introducing him as her husband sef. then he moved in with her with his yeye baggages. I warned her but she was already neck deep. She would gist me how d guy fucks her even in the bathroom and ecery2corner of the house regardless of her kids presence. He went as far as sucking her vijay when plating her plating hee daughters hair and many more nonsence soon he 50k from her account dont ask me how. Then ge later withdrew 75k when she questioned him he used sex to shut her up until she started hiding her atm his true character came out. He would beat her at every opp. We brought police to kick him out because he refused to leave hmm. Women becareful o some of these men are evil

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    1. ๐Ÿ˜ฎ

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    2. Oh dear, thank goodness that she received sense in time, the guy came only the sex and money, shame!

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    3. Which kind of useless mother is that,im sorry to say. How can you allow a man to be having sex abi sucking you in ur kids presence.
      She didnt even think dis man can abuse her daughter one day since hes a nympho.

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    4. Good fuck no dey let woman think well.. ๐Ÿ˜œ๐Ÿ˜…๐Ÿ˜…

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    5. Na wa....o,see wetin toto and preek matter cause

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    6. Is fuck food? Is it the basis of a relationship? People attract their kind.

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    7. Lol, no be small at bed and roses. Na was wa!!!!he was giving her head Infront of her daughter. Ahhh, the man is a molester in the making. Hian, na was ooo

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    8. Wen u value fuck more than decency. Like this is disgusting in front of her kid?? Sorry but she is irresponsible

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    9. Your friend is useless. This is how the society raise messed up kids imagine her children practising what they saw mummy and uncle doing on other kids.

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    10. Wait, I’m trying to picture the positioning of all of them.

      How were the sucker and suckee/plaiter positioned and how was the plaitee positioned?

      Okay, I think I have a clue: sucker was lying on his back while suckee/plaiter sat on his face, and then plaitee backed suckee/plaiter abi? Your friend and her boyfriend are both mad.

      This is the root of the madness we see on social media where young girls have no qualms displaying their bodies and are overtly and unnecessarily sexual.

      How can a decent mother do this sort of thing? Why won’t she jam such a pervert? It’s disgusting.

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  5. You are so correct @ Victoria.
    Though both sex can do with your advice.

    Stay safe everyone.

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  6. Good point,am a single mother and I know how it's feels.Man out there only want to use and dump.God help us

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  7. Or these men nees to use some stup1d single mother to breed bastards for them & not interested at all in any serious/ long term relationship!!!
    ***see how several women become serial baby mamas & bastard breeders for men who (ab)use & dump them. These sorts of men enjoy seeing & hearing from the woman begging them for money, child support, school fees, rent money & running upandan desperate for one thing or the other.
    Single girls & single mothers too should be stay WOKE!!!

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    1. 10;31 God's creation can never b a Bastard in ur context. Find honey and sugar. If it gives u diabetes it's better. Ur type belongs 6ft below.

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    2. 10;31 God's creation can never b a Bastard in ur context. Find honey and sugar. If it gives u diabetes it's better. Ur type belongs 6ft below.

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    3. **Ur type belongs 6ft below ๐Ÿ˜ฏ
      Anon was totally wrong to call a child a bastard but your statement is worse.

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    4. How I hate it when innocent kids are called bastards, gosh!!! No child is a bastard, you guys need to stop it.

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  8. Aptly said.
    Freeloaders everywhere, Ladies be wise

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  9. If you have watched A fall from Grace, you will understand what sleek men do to mature women in the name of love.

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    1. That movie make sense die,to think it was her childhood friend that planned the whole thing.

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  10. Let me share my mum's experience with people like this.
    My mum was running a restaurant then and she was making it big..she is a single mum and she carried all the load alone. Still those parasitic men will become and borrow from her, some would profess fake love , stay with her all through the weekend and help her . The one that wants to pay school fees will come to her , the one that wants to pay rent will come and she will give because she wants to settle down.
    Not until one devil came, he lost his wife and he has 2 kids, he professed love for my mum,my mum carried all the kids bukata, sometimes she will want to go extra mile for them just to please the man and his kids at my own detriment. After 5 years of dating, the man said he cannot marry her that he prefers his late wife's sister.my mum was really depressed for years, I tried all I could to make her cheer up, families and friend tried , still no improvement, I was angry at a point ,I had to just stay in school and stopped coming home. Business became bad, and she had to rely on savings to pay my school fees and rent. Later she started complaining of no money.she opened up later that she borrowed do many men and they didn't pay back, she thought they would marry her, not knowing they were using her, I was still young then to understand, the last one that came promised her marriage and she was so sure so she gave him everything almost 3million then as at 15 years ago. He used it to rent an apartment and married his late wife sister. That was what made her depressed..she almost emptied her account thinking she would eventually marry him. When she learnt about his marriage, went to his house to display madness for him and he promised to pay 10,000 every month, well he did but the money could not be used for anything tangible. Now my mum is still struggling to pick her pieces, someone that was a millionaire before, now has less than 100k In her account ..I've really learnt from her experience

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    1. OMG!! Your mum encountered the wrong kinds of men. They came to take, take and take

      Please, be there for her and help her to start her business again.

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    2. sad story, seriously ladies, STOP GIVING MEN YOUR MONEY

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    3. Anon 11:21.... OMG,what is so bad about staying alone without sex? Your mom kept falling for the same thing over and over again. She was just gullible, I feel for her. It's not late to get it right. Talk to her,she should seat up and forget men for now. She can still make her money. Pls.be her backbone and Chase men off of her.

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    4. One of the things I learnt on SDK is "Karma is a Bitch"

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    5. My mum doesn't have time for men again, she's approaching her 60's. She cannot do any strenuous work again. Thank God she sent me to school. She's just sad that all hardwork during her youthful years were for men and she has to depend on me . Nobody advised her and she was naive, she doesn't have friends that much, she should be enjoying all she worked for now because she worked really hard. She was always paying rent and school fees for people and borrowing.

      I remember then she had to change my school from a good private school to a government school to please the one that promised her marriage, after two terms I refused going and I begged her and cried to her to take me back to my private school

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    6. The way women carry "settle down" in their head in Nigeria is alarming. The fear of loneliness, the fear of what socity will say and the lack of respect by all push women to the extreme. I dont know if I can love to the point of sacrificing my principal or profit for a man. Abeg, wetin do exotic islands???

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  11. "Mental health specialist?" Like meaning Doctor of Psychiatric medicine?
    Please can someone explain to me when this lady attended medical school?
    If a psychologist, does that mean "mental health specialist?"

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    1. Anon 11:31, as a psychologist, it’s quite easy appropriate & financially gainful abroad , to acquire that “Mental Health” certificate to her profile, so I believe that she must have done that . We all know that abroad, as long as u are focused & determined, going to school, even while working, is urs for d asking, b4 long people who didn’t know ur itinerary & struggles over there will be doubting how u did it. I follow her & vividly remember her always stressing on her school stuff & her advice on d need for education. I also remember when she posted her graduation.

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    2. Sorry in canada and other countries, u can be or claim mental health worker/specialist with high school diploma!!๐Ÿ˜›๐Ÿ˜
      Even with less qualification or school drop outs who have the work experience, care home managers earn more than phds & medical doctors in nigeria/africa.๐Ÿ‘‹

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    3. Claiming it is not same thing as being it.
      Mental healthcare worker? good
      But specialist? No

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    4. Only the ignorant thinks a first degree in Psychology equals mental health specialist.

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    5. Lol... she’s not a ‘specialist’ in the actual sense

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  12. If you like talk from now till tomorrow, singie women go still dey fall for those men that prey on them.

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    1. hmm. desperation and societal pressure to marry. what can they do? sad reality a lot of nigerian marriages, the woman earns more and men actively even go for women who earn more, or can give them green card eg. medical doctors working abroad, so that they can use her money, use her green card and leave her. very good example Gbenro Ajibade

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    2. No be only gbenro...oh. teebilz too is sperm donor for 1 naija lady doctor in america. Most naija men in canada dey sidon for house & be forming house husband, fiancee, boyfriend etc & pimping, depending on the women to shelter them, pay bills or take loans for these lazy men.๐Ÿ˜พ

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    3. 12:02, you think there’s no pressure on men the to marry? The difference is that men don’t weep and wail as if the pressure of the world is on them.

      Some men cave in and marry terrible wives, some are lucky; yet some men damn society’s judgment.

      Believe me when I tell you there are very few things women suffe that men don’t.

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    4. they do feel pressure. from age 36 years.

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  13. What of the ones that will marry you as a single person with no children and still use and rob nkor . Men of these days are not men but gigolos

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  14. I am one of those women that still believes in the traditional form of relationship/marriage, call me local, I don't care!

    I'll have nothing to do with a man that is not financially responsible.

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    1. The same with me, if I notice a man is comfortable expecting and taking especially when he hasn’t done much or anything tangible then off I go. I rather be single and being the best version of me for a good and responsible man when he comes and even if he doesn’t then for myself than settle for a shameless idiot

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    2. That's how it should be. Anyone who thinks otherwise is simply playing.

      I wonder why a man who lacks financial sustenance would venture into a relationship to start with. That's the height of irresponsibility. To me, it implies a lack of direction and focus. If a guy who is still trying to figure out where his next meal would come from approaches me for a relationship that would be like someone dealing me a heavy slap. Even a blind man can attest to the fact that I am not the one for you and all of me screams that.

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  15. Especially here in UK...I met one that started singing marriage and making babies into my ears within 6 weeks of dating. One night he said we should be living together with my 3 kids, and I asked him how big is your house so I can move in with my kids and the idiot replied he lives in one room that what he meant was moving in with me since I live in a 3bed house. The folloday i blocked his number. Though the sex was extremely good,first time I experienced squinting but I need to protect myself,I can still get good sex from a hardworking decent man not a user.

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    1. Good you use your head not your pussy to think, if not you would have been hooked with good sex and lose your brain in the process.
      ๐Ÿคฃ๐Ÿคฃ๐Ÿคฃ๐Ÿคฃ๐Ÿคฃ

      I hope most all the single mum can act like you but it's not easy, desperation shows from miles.

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    2. Men in the UK dat is their stock in trade. Looking for ladies with either money or papers.

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    3. Lol that sounds like my ex husband. Am sure he smokes weed too.

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    4. ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚

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  16. They won't hear word now o. Later they will be sending in chronicles. Even all those ex boyfriends popping out of nowhere to get free sex, food, money and housing, i Know some dumb desperate women will be feeling fly. Sister, you should be insulted! the guy knew you were weak and would accept him back easily, try not to let it get to your head, because after pandemic even the world's best magicians will be surprised by the disappearing act that man pulls! If ur ex is bold enough to come back that means you are looking backwards not forwards, you secretly wanted him back so his number was never blocked! the other day a lot of women were commenting about destiny destroyer exes that come back for revenge only!
    Exes are exes for a reason and if you allow them to come from the past where they belong, you will have only yourself to blame.

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    1. Even when you block the weyrey ,he still finds ways to communicate using other people's phones or new lines. Asinwin!!

      Broke evil demon!!!!

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    2. LMAO!! Then pray that demon away, sis. we cannot allow these men take advantage in 2021 because 2020 don finish already lol. This pandemic has taught a lot of women vital lesson o. If you settle for less just because he has big d or fine face, that cannot help you in times of crisis.

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    3. After this crisis end Choose wisely o
      don'tfall for just sex or fine face. Look for stability, Godliness, responsibility in a man. .This covid19 done teach girls small lesson. Some guys that promised heaven and earth cannot deliver while some are running away to greener pastures/using ladies upandan to level themselves up with free food, sex and other convenience even shelter

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  17. As a single mum, my kids come first. I protect their interest and won't introduce to any man because i learnt from my first experience that men are evil.
    They come with the notion to love but all they want is to take from you.
    Ladies be wise.

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    1. So sorry about your first experience sometimes we all need to learn from our past.... but not all men are the same , you just have to take all the time you need to study them and also do no sex thing and put it in prayers

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  18. I understand what love is and what it can do but any man that is comfortable taking money from you is not it. There are the Peters who women would help and they would give them the world in return learn to diffrenciate such men by investing in them and investing doesnt mean giving him your hard earned money please but maybe introducing him to some contacts that can give him a job or something after that, you both can loan from each other but dont do it sis dont give your man money without ubderstanding his values and seeing how he treats you with the little he has.

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    1. Even with Peter, do you know what Lola might have done to secure her man considering the fact that his family hated her and he started frolicking with Munachi who was younger and prettier.


      Lola has never been naive.


      I even heard he has a baby mama now.

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  19. If you observe most of these so called users, they are very good in bed. They know they have nothing to offer so they devote their time watching porn to know a girls weak point. I have Causin like that, very jobless but leaving flamboyant. They sex you in a way that you lose your senses then they trike. This one chooses his victims lonely single parents. Thats their trick Beware of them

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    1. ๐Ÿ˜…๐Ÿ˜…๐Ÿ˜…๐Ÿ˜…๐Ÿ˜…๐Ÿ˜…๐Ÿ˜…๐Ÿ˜…๐Ÿ˜…

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    2. Professional sex machines & bastard breeders. They belong in a class of their own!๐Ÿ™Œ๐Ÿ™Œ๐Ÿ™Œ
      Their #1 target of choice is SINGLE MOTHERS & WIDOWS. They have every trick, tactics, game, manipulation in their pocket to use to rope the weak & gullible desperate women in to their perverse agenda & steal (finacially or spiritually & psychologically) from a needy woman.

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  20. It is well with women,please use your head not heart when all these men come around

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  21. I have a relative in a Yama Yama situationship. She is a single mum. But I cannot describe the nonsense she is in. When the last one happened. The whole family was prepared . As in all hands on deck to end the whole thing. We were all happy that AHH, this situationship has finally come to an end. We were so happy. Only for them to settle. Hain. It was so annoying. And my family don't want to force her because she is an adult.

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    1. I always laugh at people who form Voltron,defender of the..... when it comes to man woman matter. See ehn, you will abuse, instigate wahala, do all to separate them but if the lady has it logded in her brain that this is who she 'loves', ah, opari ni yen o!

      Women and emotions. I was once there o. You go talk taya, mock, abuse, shame:i die dia!

      Fine Face, huge phallus, and coming from a dysfunctional background ,the little affection and sweet words were so comforting. I thought him to be caring (na wash o. the caring get on/off button especially when he wanted money).

      I had found love!

      INDEED..๐Ÿ™„

      I hear whin!You never give enough,always lamenting on having bad breaks, always has a plan, something sha. You give advice, it's ignored. Yet when the wind scatter na you dey face am with am.

      Nobody can separates those kinds of people except the lady herself decides it haff do! !It must come from within her if not na express the egungun go continue dey go.

      My eye open fiam when he suggested I get loans for him.considering that the ex, a single mum(hes a guru in single mum loff) did same and paid up millions from her salary.
      My people, my eye clear o. The pounding heartbeats at the sight of him slowed back to normal and the butterflies that fluttered in my stomach at his lopsided smiles finally died... One.. by... one.

      I'm finally free. ๐Ÿคธ‍♂๐Ÿคธ‍♂๐Ÿคธ‍♂๐Ÿคธ‍♂

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    2. Anon 19:10, congratulations. Don't reconcile o!!!

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  22. NO SEX BEFORE MAETIAGE COULD HAVE HELPED YOU SPOTTED USERW FROM AFAR.
    REASON: they lack discipline and patience too.
    Single mothers and ladies beware.
    Martied women who have lazy men that do nothing but monitor their wife's account continue until she wakes up from her dumbness and see you for a leech that you are.
    Why can't a man take up his responsibility for his kids and family.? Shame on all you lazy men who have become worse than an infidel.

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    1. I dated mine for 4years without sex. It was after our introduction he started collecting money from me, las las he said i would be the one to give him money for bride price and other traditional rites. He is always waiting to get paid for one deal or contract, always expecting. The only time he ever gave me money was the early days when he was still wooing me. Like play like play i never saw him again because i insist on not giving him anymore money, that's how wedding got canceled. All because he saw the way my dad takes care of me and my siblings , he was eyeing my dad's money while he was lazy and refused to work even when i tried to get him a government job. He said the pay is small. These men are horrible, and everything is planned out from day 1.

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    2. Even though you weren't having sex with him throughout the four years period did you ever give him money? Did you ever ask him for money? Or you made it look like you were independent? It's one thing to not give and it's another to not ask and make the guy feel you can handle it all including his baggage.

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    3. My cousin is one of them. Imagine a man of 37 years old still feeding off women. The lady he was in a relationship with for 3 years has finally come to her senses,she sed she is the one paying all the bills and when she ask him to start a biz which ll be funded by her mumu cousin will say he is too big for that. I no fit give man my own money o bcos I am very stingy worse thing is to borrow him

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    4. My cousin is one of them. Imagine a man of 37 years old still feeding off women. The lady he was in a relationship with for 3 years has finally come to her senses,she sed she is the one paying all the bills and when she ask him to start a biz which ll be funded by her mumu cousin will say he is too big for that. I no fit give man my own money o bcos I am very stingy worse thing is to borrow him

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  23. It is societal pressure, low self esteem and desperation that makes us as women take rubbish from unworthy men. What can we do to stop it? Pray to God for a good man and stop bowing to societal pressures,reject all the nonsense men coming your way before God sends the right one. Try and also live your life in such a way that a worthy man will want to stay, Stop opening legs anyhow and don’t help a man whom you don’t know how he thinks or behave yet. Don’t go over board with proving yourself as you will end up messing up and the wrong man will take advantage then let us train our sons,brothers,nephews and young boys to be responsible and be ready to care and cater for his woman and family from start. Don’t just train girls and leave the boys as this is the major issue with men of today caused by our mothers and the females they encounter earlier in their lives. Men feel so entitled and expect so much yet are not decent and valuable men themselves. By the time a lot of men realize ladies are comfortable being alone rather than manage them and their toxic traits then they also notice their dream woman or their ideal women easily walk out on them. They will seat up and act right

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  24. I'm a single mum doing very well for myself and celibate for nearly 5 years now. I use the no sex to get rid of the guys just after sex and the once that stay still no sex.

    Still single and very happy. I have never given a guy my money and that will never ever happen. I do not introduce any man to my child ever.

    God will send the right man at the right time.

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    1. ๐Ÿ‘Œ๐Ÿ‘Œ Amen๐Ÿ™

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  25. Old school for life! Still find it difficult to believe that a grown woman with kids could indulge men to live off her

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  26. I am a single mum of three,I am not afraid of being alone,I just pray God should bless me with a good job or cataput me out of this country.i am a nurse midwife

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