STAND ALONE NARRATIVE
LITTLE RED FLAGS IN A RELATIONSHIP
Good day everyone, so on my birthday the person I thought was the love of my life didn't post even a picture of me to wish me well.
He is always posting other people's picture. I am very beautiful and by the grace of God , I dress really well (not to hype myself) so it's not like I am anyhow that he should use that as an excuse. He has been really nice and takes care of me financially. He called in the night and was acting all sweet boyfriend, which was really irritating to me and I didn't know when I lost it and yelled at him.
A lot of people uploaded my pics and wished me well but someone I consider the love of my life, acted like he didn't know it was my birthday even after he checked my status and he was online and that really hurts. I am really confused and don't know if I am overreacting or should really be worried?
He keeps talking about settling down with me but I am not sure I can trust him with my future any longer. BVs , please, I need you guys to advise me asap.
*First off,i think you should ask him why he did not post your photo or wished you happy birthday...I think he may be hiding something by not posting your photos or wishing you Happy Birthday.
Ask him subtly so that u dont look childish but watch what his excuse will be
You are d side chic.
ReplyDeleteNawa o! Interrogate him squarely and get the answer that you sure need mbok
DeleteSimple!
DeleteThe sure is.
DeleteDouble side chic.
DeleteNonsense, must he post your picture. He takes care of you financially, calls you often, because he didn't post your picture, you are writing chronicles, cataway you dia.
DeleteSimple and straight
DeleteSister you are a side piece. Bobo might be married sef.
DeleteAnon 16:10 why are you angry? It's no problem if he doesn't post on people's birthday. Poster talk to him about it. I know someone who gives surprise treat on birthdays to family and very close friends but never post them on SM( he post others)
DeleteObsession with social media can ruin relationships. Do people post their bank details and treasury on social media? It is maturity to take your private life off social media especially in this era of advanced witchcraft. Some people will never learn. Someone please tell her to also post when he is ..., on social media.
DeleteSide chic! The real real babe won't ear stories, so he dares notflaunt u
DeleteYou people should stop confusing this girl, they are dating not married posting your picture is the least he should have done on your birthday. Yes when you get married some gets bored and no more posting but during dating don't take that shit. He definitely has something to hide so you either ask him what it is or you start keeping a side boo(guy)for raining days I mean back up plans. Ladies don't always have to be the victim na do me I do you. Do your FBI things, snoop, ask questions, if you notice anything chop his money well infact start saving for your wedding with the other guy from his money, if he is so rich start a business from his money then after dump his ass. Babe don't get played ooooo because he go pain me.
DeleteMe I am here for after you have spoken with him beware of those that will post your picture and it will be only you that is viewing it. Babe shine your eyes even if you talk to him what assurance do you have that the next Birthday you won't be the only one viewing the status
DeleteIf it means a lot to you, you should talk to him about it. I and my spouse never posted each other while dating till date. I am a very private person and don't even post kids too so whatever works for you.
DeleteTake things easy with him, talk to him and if you feel his excuse is not satisfactory enough......you can walk.
ReplyDeletePoster are you sure he isn't a Jehovah's witness but is hiding it from you? I noticed many of them do that. It's either that or you are the side chic or he is just an egotistical person waiting for you to announce to him that it's your birthday before he can acknowledge it
DeleteBabe calm down, some people are naturally not caring and that doesn't make them bad people.
ReplyDeleteHmmmm. She just had to notice because he posts others
Deleteplease kindly explain this phenomenon.
DeleteBut he can post other people's own?
DeleteSorry but not when he posts others.
DeleteAnybody that is not caring is bad, as in BAD!!!!!!!!!, Infact run how can you say such a thing, chai see as you people make abnormal things look normal. How can somebody you intend to marry not be caring. If something bad happens that is how the person will die because somebody is not caring/nonchalant. Abeg don't normalize this run away from a person that is not caring because caring has alot to do in marriage.
DeleteAfter your birthday, has he spoken with you? You should ask instead of assuming that he was ashamed of you.
ReplyDeleteMaybe, he felt hurt by your actions when you shouted at him at night..
Madam ask him just as Stella said. That by the side, mind the way you react things instantly.
ReplyDeleteExactly dear now she will have to apologize for her reaction to him.
DeleteSays who you don't have to apologise babe take your stand. He didn't post your picture you demand for an explanation!!!!!!
DeleteSimply put, you are a side chic....
ReplyDeleteWho does that???Babes just dont put your mind there so you wont get another shocker. To think that he viewed your status and still did not wish you a happy birthday means alot,probably he is a married man
Exactly! He's very married!!!!
DeleteMmmmm this your judgement ehhh , be calming down o
DeleteTrue he might be married
DeleteHe might be lying to some girls he is shicking up that he is not dating you or he has other girl he is also serious with like he is serious with you and undecided on who to chose yet... Hence no posting of your pics
DeleteAsk him like Stella said.
To be candid shine your eyes in that relationship so that you won't be played
simply just ask and make your deductions from his reaction. it might not be a big deal or to him you might be one of many so not putting your picture is a safe place to be....men..lol
ReplyDeleteI didn't see any issue here sha may be bcx am not a fun type, but if you are nit comfortable with it talk to him about it.
ReplyDeleteFor someone that posts other peoples pic on his status, but doesn't post the pic of the one he says he loves, 🤔🤔, that's not right abeg. And then he waits till evening to call, not right.
ReplyDeleteHe might be protecting her from other men🙄🙄🙄🙄
Deleteseems she is the side chick.
Delete@this life no balance @all , no be only protecting from other men. If he's the type that doesn't put up pple's pic on their bdays, no shaking. But he does, and then he doesn't do that on his babes bday, he now called her at night. Naaa. Something is definitely wrong.
Delete@Bini, I won't be surprised o.
My love @Ceasar, once wrote that he would never ever advertise his babe or spouse on SM.
DeleteMaybe your love falls in this category of men.
A calm conversation with him will clear your doubts while you also watch for body language cues just in case he has ulterior motives.
All the best
Maybe he's trying to be private with the relationship? Anyway, like Stella said speak to him. Please be calm about it, don't shout and nag.
ReplyDeletePrivate keh, that one na kaylegs
Delete@trying to be private with the relationship got me 😂😂😂😂😂😂 but he can post pictures of other girls. He should have made it simple than bit posting at all.
DeleteShe is the other woman.
DeleteYou are not the main girl. There is someone he cares for the most and wouldn't want to upset. He called you at night a few hours to when your birthday will be over. Please that's your intuition talking. Every woman has it. The ones who don't make good use of it end up being used in the end.
ReplyDeleteAsk yourself if it was his birthday will you wait till midnight to wish him a happy birthday or you will want to be the first person to wish him first at dawn before everyone wakes up? I so much hate people who offend others and act ignorant like nothing happened. He gives you money so what? I give my friends money too and people I don't know. Mind you, these are people I am not dating so you see some people are naturally generous.
You never see boyfriend. Keep moving. I like you, you are smart to even notice the nonsense behaviour and not beclouded by love.👏
Abi ooo. I see the red flag too. Be cautious poster.
DeleteI concur.
DeleteYou are 💯 correct
DeleteBabe best advice here
This is the best advice ooo😇😇
DeleteStill keep him while searching for real life partner 😔😔 or let him open up to u😎.......if any girl is involve, let him open up to u😲😲😲.... Be calm .... Calm ur voice... If possible take him out😎... In a cool place💖.... Just two of u💖......ask him good question🤗🤗🤗..... With a good voice.... U can form tears if u can but don't rise ur voice😔😔😔
His taking care of u wella....maybe his confuse 🙄🙄🙄... Please calm down..... To avoid guys with too much love yet they can't take good care of u oooo.... Love no be food 😍😜🙄
this right here, is the realest, most uncut and undiluted truth....i encountered this same thing, and trust me, that was the very point i began to revisit the relationship status. no sugar-coating, if anybody loves you, he/she will always be proud to have/flaunt you anywhere/everywhere, any day, any time....no excuses...G!
DeleteCorrect!!!
DeleteYou cant trust him just because he didn't post your picture on his status on your birthday ?
ReplyDeleteDo you really have your priorities right ?
I can't believe I'm agreeing with you.
DeleteFor me,I wouldn't even want a guy to post my pix on Facebook of all places. If it's on WhatsApp,that's a bit okay but I still won't sweat it out if he doesn't.
I mean,what happens if you guys break up.
For me,so long he treats you right and to a considerable extent is caring,respects you and has had the fear of God in him, that's okay
Mbok which one is picture posting again?
Make nobody advertise me please.
Whatever rocks your boat jare.
Free the guy mbok
Don,she definitely has her priorities right. I for one am not a picture freak but i don't joke with putting up my husband's pictures on my dp and status every now and then, even while we were courting. There is nothing wrong in putting up her picture on a special occasion like her birthday. Failing to do so speaks volume!
DeleteThe dude might just be doing it for her own good😏😏😏
DeleteYou always surprise me Don. If he posts other people's pictures on their birthday why can't he post that of the woman he's with?
DeleteLiz, you said your husband but they are not married.
DeleteThat's the difference.
Kokolet, I don't see posting of pictures as anything, maybe I be old school.
DeleteWhat if he doesn't want his relationship on social media, think about it..
marvel you don fail exam be that even with epistle you write o
DeleteSince most Nigerian girls consider
ReplyDeletebeing given money as "being caring,"
the dudes now see the receivers of monies as
their entitlements; just collect the
cookies (probably) he pays for and go his way.
Beauty is not in "yelling at him," Beauty is not in facial looks.
Beauty is in character. And when a man
wants to marry, all he looks for is
a lady that has good character.
I have always told girls here to
not collect money from guys until you
agree to marry them. Don't give them
cookies (not saying it's the case here) until he pays your bride price.
That is if you want to retain your
respect as a woman and think straight.
🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️
Weather you give a man cookies or not who want to marry, respect and treat you right will do that.
DeleteBitter truth,you have destroyed the table!!!
DeletePlease read what you just wrote and go back and read the Chronicles. This time around, slowly and calmly
DeleteKeeper of record of all blog visitors eligible to make heaven. I dey hail o
Do forgive us in advance. Nigeria is too hot for you to banish us to hell prematurely.
Try calm down sometimes
ANG what happened?
DeleteThem hack you? See as you make sense today without being blindly judgemental.. Kudos nne
Did Marvel read the same comment that Bekkeee read?
DeleteThis world is indeed mysterious.
Some people are so biased that they butcher others
as soon as they see them. Wow!🤷🏻♀️🤷🏻♀️🤷🏻♀️🤷🏻♀️
Don't bother asking him,just move on,you deserve better,a guy that can't publicly declare you are his it's not worth your time,move it babe
ReplyDeleteIf she can move on without asking him that will be beautiful but is better she clears the air first.
DeleteSide puppy alert!
ReplyDelete100 percent side puppy,it's so sad,poster don't put all your eggs in a basket. Give yourself brain
Delete😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😁😁😁😀😀. Yvonne why na? Which one be side puppy😂😂😂😂😂
Delete😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂
DeletePoster well one point to note: You don't have to be physically beautiful before someone should treat you well and with respect. That aside..How you feel is very valid been that he posts other people's pictures and when it was yours he didn't do that..Well you need to ask him why he did so but not with showing childish tantrums..Have a conversation with him on why he did that be very calm,open your ears, watch his tone of voice and body language..How and what he answers will determine your next step of action, the type of person he is and the value he places on you..Anyway Hope you had a wonderful celebration with lots of laughter..I pray God increases you on every side..All the best..
ReplyDeleteAgain I am not happy you yelled at him: He is the one that didn't do well and you may have to apologize for your reaction when it should be the one way round..Just take it cool..
DeletePhoenix you said it all with your first paragraph.
DeleteAwww I know that feeling it hurts like hell 🤗
ReplyDeletePoster so posting your picture on your birthday is what will assure you that he loves and cares for you?.Listen,there are people who don't like show offs.Posting your pictures is not their own way of showing care especially when you are not yet married.Some people wait till it's official before posting your pictures.Some people too are private and don't like social media and PDA.If he called you and wished you a happy birthday and all,what else are you looking for.is it that You want to pepper some people or what exactly.You are over reacting chose your battles wisely or better still go and be in a relationship with someone who likes posting and PDA
ReplyDeleteThank you !
Delete@ DeHeroine. I'm with you on this. Please if we are not married, don't post my picture. Yes I said what I said and I'm a lady.
DeleteI know some people try to hide their relationship from the outside world until after marriage. Some can also give excuse of this, while they are cheating.
ReplyDeleteMany men I know only flaunts after marriage and not all men. Some married men won't still use their wife's pics as dp, and it dosent mean they all love their wives less or are cheating.
I will suggest, in his birthday too, don't post and see his reaction.
But for now, i think you are over reacting
HF bedding, you forgot to add ...and call him at when his birthday is almost over.👆⬆️
DeletePosting someone's picture on a WhatsApp status doesn't mean you love or do not love that person... He on his end may want to keep your relationship private, he could as well deceived you by changing the privacy to be viewed by only you... don't let a mere social media post make you lose a good man, don't get me wrong... I will advise you speak with him subtly
ReplyDeleteSide chicken alat
ReplyDeleteThis comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
ReplyDeleteSee me almost sending you a voice note forgetting it's a blog,pls babe,forget him ooo,am screaming,the mere fact he celebrates others on his dp and didn't celebrate you is a dangerous flag,stay away from that nigga,know your worth,everywoman deserves better,no explanation will do,he has non,I hate nonsenses!!!
ReplyDeleteI laugh and laugh and laugh......
DeleteSo every other good side of him the poster stated is being flawed because he didn't post her pic on a social media platform..... Oh c'mmon
So you'd call off yours just because of this same issue if it happens huh?
So posting of pictures now translate to love ?
DeleteWhat if he doesn't want his relationship on social media ?
Moreover they are not married yet, what's the fuss about the picture thing, why leaving important things and be blinded by flimsy things.
You're his side chic talking from experience. Please move on you deserve someone better.
ReplyDeleteOf course, he is always talking about "settling down with you"
ReplyDeleteso that nothing will tamper with his access to the cookie jar
And this man has not proposed to you and he is already the
"love of your life" and that gives you the right to yell at
him over the phone, really?
Dudes, hate nagging and a nagging woman above all things.
When he looks into the future, all he sees is nagging
and all he sees is that he should run!
🤢💨💨💨💨💨
Poster, you're just a girlfriend and has no rights to his DP.
ReplyDeleteMaybe, I'm the only woman in the world that doesn't really care about social media show of love between lovers.
Just say the important words to me in person and whatever you decides to post online is between you and your followers/fans.
You're acting all selfish and entitled just because he didn't post your pictures on your birthday, the Lord is your strength.
Meanwhile, you should have asked him why he didn't post your pictures on his page, since you're so bothered and its a red flag to you
Ms A Same here..I am a freaking private person..I always tell my friends not to share my pictures..I cherish my privacy like crazy..Between me and Beyonce I no know who private pass..
DeleteWell I don't feel she is entitled..At least person wey love you suppose make her feel loved..I feel its more than not posting her picture on her birthday..
Ms A I don’t quite agree with you on this.
DeletePoster isn’t selfish.
I’m not a SM type of lover either but on a day as this, the least he could have done is send a message. Not totally ignore her existence. No message, no call. Till late at night....thats a big no.
The only advise I have for the poster is for her to make sure they are both on the same page as to them being in a relationship.
I don’t think the guys acknowledges her as his girl. Or perhaps the relationship is still young.
You this woman. You have not changed. Smh. Always so self righteous. Didn't you see the part where she said he never acknowledged her birthday even after seeing her status? He pretended like it wasn't her birthday. Please give us your self righteous response. Madam babies born from single moms are bastards. Stella will not post this as usual but I still typed it
DeletePoster you are dating yourself, the guy is not proud of you and you cannot be his real wife.
ReplyDeleteIt is good you confront him to find out why he did what he did, but do not take whatever he says as a serious matter because he has no reasons for not posting your pictures on your birthday.
I hope you will not post his own on his birthday. Make sure you start looking else where for another relationship as this one is not dating you at all.
Exactly. This actually happened to me, though it might be different for poster. I overlooked this redflag. He posted others pictures on his dp and had their pictures on his phone. He didn't have one picture of mine. I questioned him, and all he came up with were excuses. They were colleagues, ex school mates etc. So I think that poster, your instincts are kicking in for a reason. Talk to him about it sha.
DeleteNa wa..posting your picture doesn't mean love please!
ReplyDeleteI have never posted my husband's pictures on his birthday while both dating and married and vice versa. Sometimes wisdom demands you don't expose your source of joy before the sharks come trooping! It has been 8years of a blissful, respectful marriage with 3kids. Living a good quiet life all the over the world. I will not post his pictures for pda today or tomorrow let me enjoy in peace! Sister, be wise and learn to sieve the wheat from the chaff. Love and light!
💯💯
DeleteBut you didn't wait till night to wish him well on his birthday right?
DeleteI wish him well on his birthday anytime of the day I am able to..be it morning, afternoon or midnight! I wish him well everyday of his life not just birthdays! I post and celebrate others on my page/phone. It doesn't mean anything. Like I said before, learn to sieve the chaff from the wheat.
DeleteEeyah, I know how things like this can hurt. If not that he posts other people's pictures, I would have said maybe he's not a SM person. Tell him how this hurts you without being rude, hope you're not the side chick.
ReplyDeleteJust general question, how can someone say they love you and want to spend the rest of their life with but they can go days without calling/messaging you. You will call, no call back, you text, no acknowledgement of text, no reply for days, then a good 4 days or more later, you get a call back with no mention of past few days calls/messages.... its official, I'm dating myself
ReplyDeletegood morning.
DeleteHahahaha...this one is a fling, not even a sidechic.
DeleteBlank that person.
DeleteDelete his or her number right away, I mean right now.
Some people do not like posting pictures....but if he posts other people, even saw your status and said nothing.....its not NORMAL!
ReplyDeleteDat guy is married, talking frm experience..
ReplyDeleteYou are his side chic or you're probably dating a married man. Tell him how you feel. You need the explanation asap.....
ReplyDeleteThere could be various reasons
ReplyDelete1.You're the side chick.
2.He probably doesn't want something long term with you.
3.He has got eyes on someone else. Etc
Whatever his reasons may be, that man is bad news.
I think we all see things differently. I post my family and friends pix to wish them happy birthday, anniversary, for safe delivery etc. But I've never posted my husband nor kids pix to wish them anything. If you are on my contact list without knowing me personally, you won't even know that I'm married not to talk of having 2 kids. Find out if your guy is my kind of person or, maybe he has his reasons
ReplyDeleteSame thing happend to me
ReplyDeleteFor good two years he never posted my oix, called or sent msg and I will just call him and his reply will be "does it matter"?
But I will always do on his own
The third year, I shunned too and he complained that I for his and I told him I didn't that it was a deliberate one.
My dear, na from that day I just quietly walked away (we never said good bye) we just talk, chat and see.
Only for Mr man to come up withwedsibg oix April 2019 thinking he has hurt me.
I didn't complain and I wishes him well
August 2019 was my own wedding four months after his which is still a shocked to him cus he has not stopped asking me how it happens and wants friendship again.
Girl, you are the side chic
Walk away now (no fight, no quarrels) just play along and save your heart from a big hit
HE GOT SERVED! @16:27🤣🤣🤣
DeleteYou are my kinda girl! 👍
Women, know your worth❗
Some guys and ladies never post their significant other's picture until they are about to get married. That's what I'll do o. Don't just assume your boyfriend is bad or you're a side chick. Express your feelings to him and find out why.
ReplyDeleteMy dear you have the right to be worried since he posts other people's pictures.
ReplyDeleteSome people don't like posting pictures but not when he post other people's picture.
He's not even smart, he should have changed his status setting to only you and post it.
I'm a lady and will never post my boyfriend's picture till he becomes my husband.
ReplyDeleteThank God for your life miss lady, but this is not an excuse for this man not to post her picture
DeleteThe other ladies he posted their pictures during their birthdays are probably colleagues or acquaintances that his main babe probably knows too so he wouldn't have to explain. If he posts your pictures, he wont have a tangible explanation because you are the second girlfriend.My dear, don't ask him anything, just observe closely and close your legs while at it and please, keep your heart open to other people,so you don't weep major tears. He is not genuine. I wish you all the best Sister.
ReplyDeleteWhat he did was bad since he posts other people's pictures. It will be a different ball game if he isn't a social media person. You may or may not be the side chick. What if he posted your picture and set the status privacy to just you being the viewer.
ReplyDeleteAsk him questions and read through his responses.
I wonder what made you write this up..
ReplyDeleteIs this your first ever relationship?
Or
Is this your first time of being in a relationship with a nice guy?
Or
Whatsoever whatsoever whatsoever....
You already see yourself below the standard of other celebrants he's been posting and that worries you alot....
You have trust issues to ever start thinking you can't trust him with your future because he didn't upload your pic...
He's been nice in every other aspect but not posting your pic is making you doubt his love and care..
Haunty relax your mind...
See don't mind all thos people ooooo, of he doesn't post generally ot os a different thing but he post others he is suppose to post yours too
DeletePoster if he posts other peoples own,I don't see the reason why he wouldn't do this same for you, I have a feeling that he might be married or have a serious person apart from you.please put your eyes on the ground to see.
ReplyDeleteExactly.
DeleteHe only calls at night?
ReplyDeleteThat's how they behave,as if they don't know what they are doing till one day it will dawn on you that you are not in a relationship.
ReplyDeleteI don't post my boyfriend on social media, be it his birthday or anything.
ReplyDeleteYeah I post other people. He knows I'm not cheating or anything. He does she post mine though. I don't have any reason whatsoever, that doesn't mean I love him less
Aug nwanyi1.....And you don't call him or text him to greet him happy birthday till maybe 10 or 11 in the night when everyone has gone to bed to sleep like the posters' married boyfriend?
DeleteI don't know why everyone is focusing on posting of pictures on social media but ignoring the obvious.
Poster you are dating a married man and if he isn't married yet trust me he is seriously engaged to someone. On your birthday he was chilling with that person so there was no way he could escape from her grip for a few seconds to acknowledge your existence. When she went to bed or went back to her house he remembered you were still alive. No vex🤗but you are his side duck 🦆.
Anyone asking you to calm down,saying its no big deal,doesn't love you,this so called relationship is a sham,why am I even revisiting this??,cause I am bothered in my spirit about this and I want to save you from future heartbreak,you better walk away now with your head held high or regret it later,don't say I didn't warn you!peace and all the best as you heed this!!✌️✌️✌️
ReplyDelete1. He called at night on your birthday. 🚩
ReplyDelete2. He did not post your picture on SM on your birthday - 🚩 (because he posted other people's pic)
3. Your intuition distrusts him because of not posting your picture on SM. 🚩 (there are previous triggers you did not state in your chronicle)
4. He takes care of your, financially and talks about setting down but has he met your family or you his? 🚩
Please, don't let a man string you along and play you like a guitar until your strings cut.
Poster don't take that guy too serious,just keep him as an ordinary friend nothing much or you can keep him for flexing purpose
ReplyDeleteAbeg....."EVEN YOUR BOO GET E BOO"...You are not his main babe...Just take note
ReplyDeleteFrom the experience, you are not the only woman in a relationship with him. There is someone else.
ReplyDeleteThis is silly to me. He doesn’t have to post your pic
ReplyDeleteAsk him to introduce you to his family and friends and forget this social media rules and regulations