Stella Dimoko Korkus.com: Chronicle Of Blog Visitor Narrative....

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Sunday, October 11, 2020

Chronicle Of Blog Visitor Narrative....

Hmmmm.......









STAND ALONE NARRATIVE
CONFUSED ABOUT WHOM TO CHOOSE


Dear Stella,

Kindly post it in chronicle, i need your honest advice and that of bvs too.


I met Mr. A when I just got admission into a high institution. He left the country at the same time.


He made his intentions known to me over the phone and I accepted his relationship. Our relationship blossomed into a courtship. He came into the country when I had just finished my youth service and was already working. Things didn't go as we planned and he had to start life all over again, eventually he left the country a few years ago to start life afresh.


He is now working in his new country and communication between both of us has dropped drastically, like we can stay a month or more without saying hello to each other. I decided not to always initiate conversation so it won't be as if i am pressuring him or looking desperate to marry.


Kindly note; Mr. A is caring, humble, domestically inclined, and God fearing, generous. He is a graduate. He also made his intentions known by proposing marriage "engagement" and also came to see my people.



I recently met Mr, B through a mutual friend and he made his intentions known "marriage". From the time I have spent with Mr. B and from my findings and observation he is a great guy, caring and also domestically inclined, humble and generous, God fearing too. He loves me very much, in fact he says i am the best thing that ever happened to him. That God has answered his prayers concerning his soulmate. Yes i care about Mr. B too i like him, and i love how he loves me more and all. Mr. B is the breadwinner of his family. He is a business guy and doing well for himself.



Please note; If i marry Mr.B i will have to be the brain box of the family because he is not so academically sound, he can't write so fluently(there are always mistakes in his writing) and he is used to speaking his native language all the time. He is very street smart.

We all are from the same tribe.

I have been praying to God concerning all these too. I really want God's plan for me.

My concerns are as follows;

1. Should I reignite my relationship with Mr.A? But I don't know the year he is coming back.
2. Should I go ahead and marry Mr. B ?
3. In the next few years I will be thirty years old

Please I need your honest advice, no sugar coating. Please say it as it is.

I will be in the comment section to clarify anything that needs to.
Thank you.





*You sound like you are desperate to marry?You also sound like you are not in love with both men otherwise you will not be confused about who to choose....Since it is this way,goose the one you feel will best satisfy you as a husband.....They say a bird in the hand is worth two in the bush...

You get my drift?

67 comments:

  1. Marry the one you can submit too.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. From what I can read both men come get K leg..............
      Must you marry any of them? No one is perfect so it is important to choose what you can live with.

      Delete
    2. Lol. I get your driftooo Stella. And I agree too. Poster better go with the one that's available ooo. You don't even know if A would have returned by the time you reach 40

      Delete
    3. This is a dicey one and i just pray that you don't get to make a mistake whilst at it

      Delete
    4. Poster, Mr A is not in a relationship with you. You want to marry Mr B...does he want to marry you? You can train him to be right for you if he's willing. If you want a house where there'll always be relatives to care for marry him o. But if you know you can't accept plenty relatives dependent on you, please drop him, we're not interested in your Chronicles later in life

      Delete
    5. Relationship-A is dead.

      Give Mr. B a serious chance.

      Delete
    6. How are people meeting all these Mr A and Mr B? πŸ€”

      Delete
    7. Once I see "I will be turning so and so years" in any chronicle, I no dey like to advise because it's difficult to advise a desperate person.

      Delete
    8. I think you like mr. A more but To tell you the truth Mr. A is not interested in you. That meeting of your family is just to tie you down n keep u waiting for him until he finally meets the girl of his dreams. When a man sees what he likes he will waste no time getting it and going thru any means to attain it so another man cannot get it. You even hit the nail on the coffin when you said you initiate most of the contact. Sorry to say but he is probably getting more interested in another girl over there but keeping you on a leash in case that girl doesn't work out. Cut him loose. As for Mr. B you will have to decide if the lack of education is a barrier for you. Some women will be okay with it as long as the man is financially stable. To me, he seems more into you than Mr. A and you said he is financially okay. Those are two ticks in my book.

      Delete
  2. Marry the one you can submit too when the chips down.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Mr.A gas moved on naa...abi u no code? Abroad is on your bucket list you are willing to be a farm tool😁.

    Go with Mr.B and if you dont love him enough because he can't speak English like Obama, then wait..keep waiting cos as for A, he already has someone oiling his engines abroad.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Is the poster not been oiled by Mr B?as for I will never

      Delete
  4. The ball is in your court dear poster

    ReplyDelete
  5. When a woman says, "I don't want to appear like I am desperate," she is desperate.
    When a woman tells you (anonymously) how old she will be in her next birthday, she is desperately desperate.
    Yes, no sugar-coating she says.
    If you have not been fornicating with these A/B, then, you have not lost anything. If you have "been praying to God" and he is "silent," there are one of these two things;
    *You have not given your life to Jesus
    or
    *You simply are hoping to get a husband from him and vanish to live your life the way you want.
    Why do I say so?
    Jesus said, John 10:27"my sheep hear my voice and I know them and they follow me..."
    So, what to do?
    Forget about Mr. A, forget about Mr. B. Make Jesus your Lord, be his "sheep," follow him in his teachings in the New Covenant,
    and you will hear him, you will find peace.
    😘😘😘😘😘😘😘😘😘😘😘😘😘😘😘😘😘😘😘

    ReplyDelete
  6. Biko marry mrB and forget about me abroad ooo before 30 will Nack on your head

    ReplyDelete
  7. Abroad!
    You want to "re-ignite" a decayed log of wood ba? Okay, buy fuel, petrol, disel, kerosene, lighter fluid, Sulphur, matches and re-ignite and burn your entire life just like the flames of hell?πŸ”₯

    ReplyDelete
  8. My dear,from all indications, you're desperate for marriage. So if I'm to choose,I'll go for the one at hand. Mr A might have moved on from you so make do with the available one.

    ReplyDelete
  9. But mr. A is no longer in the picture my dear, the guy has moved on and you should too. As for Mr. B, if you think you don't mind his bad English, then you should concentrate on getting to know him more.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I just tire. Poster, you go a whole month without speaking to each other and you think you're in a relationship?

      Delete
    2. Cookie 😍😍😍πŸ₯°πŸ₯°πŸ₯°

      Delete
  10. I don't know how some of you ladies manage having Mr A, and then a Mr B on the sideπŸ€”. I think you should talk with Mr A and find out if he's moved on so you can do the same with Mr B. Sometimes when God is silent, it may mean both of them are not in His will for you. Do not be in haste, there's got to be someone out there whom you won't be confused about

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Jugina...Didnt you read when she said Mr A reduced communication ?

      Delete
    2. Anon 18:21, I read that, but it is not enough reason for the poster be in another relationship when she hasn't ended up things with her man. I mean, he went as far as engaging her. If she wants out let her talk to him first instead of having another guy or how is she different from her guy whom many assume may be with another woman without first finding out where she stands with him?

      Delete
    3. Do you guy's know what Mr A is going through abroad?
      Sdk u live abroad can you pls tell some of us what some immigrants go through in the abroad

      Delete
    4. @ kiks- bal ..How old are you? Who seek permission before moving on when the other party is not communicating again.

      Delete
  11. The first has moved on,no one keeps off contact from someone they are truly in love with.
    Mr b.will frustrate you with low mindset,he may not be the type to allow you chase your dreams or get a higher education.you may end up managing one of his shops.Because of the street people he associate with,his sense of reasoning may be archaic.when you ve issues,will he act civilized or shout and act like an agbero?.
    The choice is yours

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I beg to disagree with you. That someone is Street smart wouldn't mean that he won't support her dreams. My dear ,as for MR A,forget him,no one goes out of communication with someone they truly love,then for MR B i think you should study him closely and know him more .

      Delete
  12. Poster, Mr.A has obviously moved on and if you try to re-ignite the relationship how sure are you that you won't be dating yourself eventually (if he pretends to reciprocate) moreso, you don't know when he is coming home and if you start asking him about it, it will only make you look desperate. So take a walk.

    Mr. B, it's obvious you don't have an unconditional love for him ( since his English language is your problem) you won't be proud of showing him off as your husband. Please leave Mr.B let someone who cherishes "everything" about him marry him.

    So helpnyou God.

    ReplyDelete
  13. Why is Mr A not calling as usual?
    Any relationship that lacks communication is going to die.
    I think u should pray about your relationship and tell God to give u the one he has for u.pls don't rush into marriage bcos it is not a child play.
    All the best.

    ReplyDelete
  14. Babe no matter how careful u are marriage na local rice because u must chop stone.

    ReplyDelete
  15. If you need to reignite your relationship with Mr A then he is not in the picture. Good to know you want God's plan for you, God has promised that as you acknowledge Him, He will direct you.
    Seek God's kingdom first
    I pray you receive God's counsel and direction as you continue to commit it to Him.
    Stay blessed hun

    ReplyDelete
  16. Whenever someone tells me they're confused about who to choose, this is what I tell them:

    Close your eyes, imagine that I have a gun and I have to shoot one of these men, who should I shoot?
    You have the answer

    Although Mr A's "head no dey house again". He doesn't seem as interested as he used to be. You also don't know when he would return to complete the marriage procedure. It'd be risky waiting for this man.
    I guess you've fallen out of love with him also.
    As for Mr B, Which one is brainbox of the family? At least he can type and you can read it, he can run a business and he has himself together... What else?
    If you don't love him based on my first paragraph test then let him go.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Lol... ‘brainbox of the family’... the thing taya me.

      Poster if you’ve checked everything and his only problem is English, if he is someone willing to improve himself, you both can hire an English tutor for him. Or you buy Queen primer and Dictionary and start teaching him small small

      Delete
    2. Lol@ who should I shoot.
      Anyways poster, Mr A is no more in your equation.

      Delete
  17. Getting bored of these who to choose chronicles. Even if we help you who is to say it won't end in tears.we can pick the one that supposedly looks good now and what if he changes later ? Please just listen to your instincts they are there to guard you.

    If you know see something you don't like or can't tolerate dont think twice just move !

    ReplyDelete
  18. Poster your only problem with Mr B is academic qualification ba? Please go for Mr B, the handwriting is already on the wall concerning Mr A.

    ReplyDelete
  19. Aunty, marry mr B. With your influence, he'll learn.!

    ReplyDelete
  20. Aunty nawa for you oo, you don't need rocket science to tell you Mr A has moved on hence the delay in call.

    If you love Mr B you can marry him since you so much much want marry before 30years old. Its up to you girl.

    ReplyDelete
  21. Mr A has obviously moved on. If you really cannot consider Mr B, please let him go

    ReplyDelete
  22. I couldn't help but notice you didn't say you loved Mr. B back, but you seem to still be in love with Mr. A. If Mr. A has started marriage talks with your parents then what drove you to Mr. B. Are you only in love with Mr. A because he's abroad or are your feelings genuine?
    I'm really not here to give any advice because it seems to me you have already made a choice and you're just in search of validation.
    One thing though, never you marry someone you cannot love.

    ReplyDelete
  23. I don't think you should marry either men. Mr. A who you truly desire has probably moved on while it's obvious you don't love Mr. B.

    If you are still in a relationship with Mr. A, it seems you're cheating on him.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Is not compulsory for her to love him...Bible says men love your wives and women be submissive

      Delete
    2. Anon 18.23 can you hear yourself? It's people like you that promote infidelity in marriages.
      Please stop with your evil bible interpretations and pray for the gift of understanding that the spirit may guide you to read the gospel and understand it properly

      Delete
    3. This may be countercultural but anon has a point. The Bible doesn't make love a requirement for getting married. It tells men to find a virtuous woman and advices believers to intermarry. However, we have to love who we are married to. Hence, men love your wives. I think it's because in the Jewish culture, just like many cultures of the world, people married out of duty, or through betrothals or when of age. Of course it is wise to marry who we love, but even as of 200yrs ago, love was not in the picture. There was no dating, no boyfriend/girlfriend, no being in love. It was engagement and straight marriage. Most of the time, the couple saw each other for the first time on their wedding night.

      Delete
  24. Once I see a chronicle with Mr A,B or Z,I lose interest instantly.So ms A,B,C,I wish you well o.

    ReplyDelete
  25. Go with MrA possibly a better person will come along trust me Mr B is a no no they will come with I want to marry you especially if you are desperate to settle and pretend to be all nice and if you have a stable job you will end up becoming the breadwinner and what you term as street smart most times turn out to be crooks,Try and reignite with A ask if you can pay him a visit some people are not the communication type but prefer physical presence.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. You are right...Street smart can mean so many things.

      Delete
    2. Some people are not the communication type,but not going with no communication for one month for the one you claim you love? I don't thats a good excuse for such acts. Love is an action word,people need to do better.

      Delete
    3. Asking her to go and see a man that has clearly lost interest will be emotional suicide and you know it. U think he is distant now, the way he will so disappear from her life after she goes there ehn u will be shocked.
      Please stop giving bad advice. A man should be the one seeking out a woman , looking for her calling her , trying to see her. Maybe by some of poster's utterances to Mr. A he now feels like she needs him more because of a chance to go abroad. He is feeling himself. Poster all I advice stop talking to Mr. A completely as in go no contact. Then the next order of business is to work on your looks n ur body n be posting WhatsApp pics regularly. Or on whatever social media he is on. Let us see if he won't contact you. Even then u must not break contact n respond to him until at least a month has passed. Continue posting n then randomly contact him after the no contact period citing useless excuses like u were busy etc or some other useless excuses that the guy is giving u now. Ladies always always act like you are not afraid of losing a man, that is the only way to keep him. All these people telling u to force ignition of spark on top man that u don't even know if he has a steady babe distracting him there. If u want real advice about men, then ask a man that isn't trying to sleep with you and not a woman

      Delete
    4. I agree with you, sometimes i think ladies need to be very strong minded
      Exactly what you mentioned here was the exact thing i did to my guy o. My guy just woke up one day and started to act weird, hardly communicate,he was so distance from the relationship, several times i asked if everything was okay which he always answered in affirmative, but his body language actions says otherwise. I acted neutral, minding my business, if he doesn't call me, i wont even bother, days weeks,but i was posting beautiful pictures of me on Instagram where he could see, with several comments from ofc my admirers.
      This past week, hes been the one calling and am acting busy,so my dear,i agree with you. I hope some ladies can be strong enough and give this men their own medicine

      Delete
  26. @BV Tenth is as if you took the words from my mouth.poster above all,seek the face of God to reveal to you a sign about your husband.

    ReplyDelete
  27. Poster please take time to pray to God about both men. Call Mr. A and ask him your observation and ask about the direction of your relationship. Not being able to speak English correctly is not a crime and you can always teach Mr. B. The most important thing is having a kind heart, loving you, being faithful to you and most importantly having a genuine fear of God. Sometimes the person you love might not be the right person for you.

    ReplyDelete
  28. None of those guys seem like any good option tbh. A is stringing u along n trying to tell u there is no interest but B is not up to your standards. You don't have to settle but with the way you are anxious to marry before 30 you may have to cus it seems u don't feel u deserve better than both. Truth is you are way to emotionally invested in the outcome with Mr. A n if we as readers can see it then definitely Mr. A can see it n is now relaxed. My advice to you is try n meet new guys n better options. If there are no options as at now, then definitely you need to do some self improvement. Whether it is to go to the gym, improve your dress sense, or how u do your makeup sis then i suggest u go for it. cus i won't lie, men are SHALLOW AF. Become so good they (esp Mr. A) can't ignore you. right now u operating from a mindset of lack rather than abundance n that is why you are inclined to pick from the lesser of 2 evils when it is clear that both men are not good options

    ReplyDelete
  29. Poster, don't settle until it is right. Have a list of things you require in a man n pray to God on it . When you see the man that checks all things on the list then you know that God has sent you a husband. Simple

    ReplyDelete
  30. Poster, you have NO PEACE in your heart with both men. LET GO and LET GOD.

    Going to be 30 in a few years YOU AIN'T GOT NOTHING ON METHUSELAH❗

    Colossians 3v15 AMPC "And let the PEACE (soul harmony which comes) FROM CHRIST RULE (act AS UMPIRE CONTINUALLY ) IN YOUR HEARTS [DECIDING and SETTLING WITH FINALITY ALL QUESTIONS THAT ARISE IN YOUR MINDS, in that peaceful state] to which as [members of Christ’s] one body you were also called [to live]. And be thankful (appreciative), [giving praise to God always]."

    ReplyDelete
  31. You have to find out Mr.A's visa or immigration status in the country where he is. If he is not legal, coming home to marry you or file for you may be impossible. To help you move on, you have to forget fear and have this conversation with him. Some men are cowards when it comes to breaking up but you deserve to know. Afterwards, you can give Mr.B a chance and if after 3 months you still don't feel him, let him go. Don't waste the time of men like that as they don't handle rejection well. Finally, you're still young, don't feel pressured that it has to be one of them.

    ReplyDelete
  32. You are just desperate for marriage, you don't love both Mr. A and Mr. B. Just delete the thought of i will be so so years old soon and take your time and find love, don't be in a hurry for marriage, please calm down.

    ReplyDelete
  33. Don't marry Mr B, that I am sure of.

    ReplyDelete

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