Stella Dimoko Korkus.com: Chronicle Of Blog Visitor Narrative.....

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Saturday, October 17, 2020

Chronicle Of Blog Visitor Narrative.....


Hmmm.....na wah!!!!








STAND ALONE NARRATIVE
BOYFRIEND WITH DOUBLE BARRELL MOUTH



Good day Stella. Pls, I need the input of Bvs, matured ones and especially those of men. Last year Dec, I came out of a relationship even after d intro have been done. I couldn't go on with him cos of the red flags. Thanks to u and bvs for setting my head straight. I took to your advice.


In Jan, I met a very handsome guy that was giving me green light( we were both running our PG studies)I used him as a rebound. We had a mutual gbensh in March. I initially wanted it to just be that( I told him this during the first session). He didn't say anything and I made d assumption he also wanted d same. But, I noticed that he started caring for me beyond a babe for booty call. We were in d same space for a week and den Covid19 separated us in March and I returned to my location.


Surprisingly, we started building things up thru constant communication; calls and chats. We spent four months apart ( without sex) over d phone to know each other well. Then, I started catching feelings, of which I didn't want to. Also, he started showing more care and attention. He became all up in my business with long hours calls and chats. We exchange words like "I care about you", 'I love you" etc. 


Then in June, I asked him to define what we have; whether friends with benefits that would end after a while ( in my opinion) or something we need to build on. He flared up and said why would he be investing in and taking time committing, getting to know me, bonding  and co if what we have is not leading anywhere. He said he's not just with me for sex ( I know this to be true) and he wants us to be committed to each other.. He wants me to trust him and be with him. I even suggested an open relationship but he said so far he's not cheating on me, I dare not cheat on him. He said he'll walk out of d rel d day he sees signs of me seeing another man. He added that if he's with for sex, he wouldn't be in my life now that sex isn't available for him. He taught me the meaning of commitment, sticking to ones' guns and loving at all times. 


We made arrangements to see as a couple in July. I noticed he was more into me. I was even the one asking for intimacy but he insisted he's not with me for physical touch but to know me beyond that. We had it, yeah but we spent more time bonding( talking, doing movies, praying, discussion abt our career et al). His body languages, actions, sacrifices, during my 3-days visit showed he is in love. Of a truth , as a Yoruba babe, I do hear how Igbo men take care of their women..I never experienced such pampering from any of my Yor exs until I met this my Igbo bf. He gives me attention,love, loyalty, respect, freedom of speech, password to his phones. I caught him severally staring at me, stealing glances. I woke up one night with his gaze fixed on me. 


 We got separated again and his loving became intense. I felt he was doing more of d loving sef in by his actions cos he's a man of few words but does more actions. I also noticed he was asking me questions relating to marriage, how we would cope with the diff in denomination, using "we", talking in futuristic tense and all that. We spoke about d age, d tribe and church differences. We talked! I fell for him after this meeting.



Earlier this month, on his request, he spoke to my dad on my dad's birthday. Then I asked him if he knew d interpretation of what he was doing cos talking to my parent is a new kind of commitment. I told him I don't allow flings into my family cos I don't want to put their hopes up that I have a man when I don't know yet if there's truly a man they can bank on( judging from my past messy breakup). He said he understood and reaffirmed his commitment level. In his words "we die there".


 To be sincere, this guy is a perfect boyfriend even though no one is perfect.


Then, one talk led to another a week ago( since we've reached d 6 months milestone). We had to speak about future plans and all. I told him I'm not ready to settle down now, but prob in the next 2/3 years as I am still working on myself. He's on d same page with me on this too. We're not both ready. But, I told him that we've gone beyond flings and I'm already building on this relationship from a positive light (just as he was asking me to). 


I let him know the more we go into this, the more I fall. I came out straight and asked him if what we have is 'us building for the future' or just for 'the meantime'. He then started contradicting what he told me few months ago. He said it's for d main time and he's not seeing marriage in view. He said we are not going to get married.


I faulted him for the discrepancies in his words as he knew how I take words seriously. It wasn't as if he was saying those words then when he was wooing me or trying to get into my pants. He knew what we had sexually was consensual as we both had fun. So, why did he have to work, beg and told me to trust him. He practically worked and begged me to start committing to d relationship. I gave him a piece of my mind. Then, he apologized profusely. I forgave him almost immediately cos I never regretted the moments we had.


I asked him for a space for me to get back to my initial feelings.I told him to get lost and I backed it up by instant withdrawal. I stopped getting in touch with him. In d early hours of d next day till today, he is still doing the chasing, calling and WhatsApp chatting. I ignored him for days. He said he's down himself. I told him if anyone is supposed to be down, it should be me and not him. He said I'm no more loving, and my new me is hurting him. He's begging me to get back to how I used to be with him, of which I told him it's not possible. We've been on this issue for days.


For four days now, he has been disturbing me with calls, chats and msgs. Mind you, there's no s*x between us cs we've not seen since that July and we're not currently in the same state. We're not even making plans to see anytime soon. As I am writing you Stella, he has disrupted me for 5 times with calls. He said he is in love with me, he can't get his mind off me, he's distracted at work, He can't study, he can't cope. He's sorry. He said I shouldn't take him for his words but his actions; since he's a man of few words with more actions. His actions speaks more volume. 


He asked me if his actions don't depict his true intentions? Of course, they do. He said he needs me in his life but we should stop talking as regards marriage since his words on that issue brought disagreement. I told him I'm not asking him for marriage now( he confirmed dt I'm d first babe in my age bracket he has met dt won't be pestering her man for marriage) but I can't be with him anymore if all what we are doing is just entering the baskets, with no futuristic plans.


I'm 28, he's 27 y/o, he's Catholic, I'm Pentecostal. I'm not trying to find excuses for him. I told him he has made me fall in love already and I can no more be dating him casually cos I might forget myself in the relationship and let serious suitors pass by. He said he's taking back his words as he now wants us to build things and see where it will lead to.


 Stella, I don't trust this guy anymore cos I believe he is changing mouth cos he wants me to stop ignoring him. I told him I prefer being alone than to keep deluding myself in a dead-end relationship with a confused man. Yet he doesn't want me to go . I like him too cos he has helped me to become a better person in some areas in this space of 6 months


He do repeatedly say he can't intentionally hurt me yet he couldn't answer me when I asked him what he would do when it's time for him leave in d nearest future if not to hurt me. I've told him to give me space and work on his feelings; if he's chasing me cos he misses having me in his space or cos he's sincerely in love with me. But how can a man says he love a lady yet going back and forth with her. Pls advise me. Am I overreacting?



Thank you.




*Have you asked yourself all the basic questions?
Does this guy have the capacity to settle down now?is he emotionally ready for that step?I dont think so?

Do you also know that someone people hold unto you because they cant stand seeing you love someone else the way you loved them?
You sound really intelligent so i am begging you to borrow yourself brain...
I hope he does not end up telling you his people want himt o marry from his side?Cos this is always the format.....
Decide what you want......A fling and you stick with him without emotions or you leave now before the major heart break occurs.

73 comments:

  1. He is 28....pls let him mature mentally a bit. He is not ready abeg. Let's say when he is 34/35, he would be sure of what he wants... will u wait?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. 28 is not mature? R u sure? He knows what he wants o. Let no man deceive by saying he is not sure. His indecisiveness is a choice

      Delete
    2. I'd advice you from a man’s perspective. I am a guy, and I'll tell you that that guy loves you. Most men chicken out or get scared when you talk marriage at an age or time that he's not ready to settle down. He probably feels that this one you brought marriage in at this early stage, perhaps you'd start bombarding him with marriage questions every 5 minutes.

      You said it yourself that he was speaking in the futuristic and was using 'we'. He made it a dute to care for you even after you told him it was flings that you want. Does that not ring a bell?

      Date him first and take it easy with him. For crying out loud, he's 27! He probably isn't even financially ready enough for marriage. If you force him into marriage, na same u wey go come dey tell us for here say 'he's not man enough'.

      Madam calm down abeg. Don't Goan push a good man away out of paranoia.

      If you like listen to all these women here. Good luck!

      Delete
    3. @ the web pamphlet you're a man but definitely not one of integrity or truth. That is if you are not poster or one of her friends coming to sugar coat things to make her feel better. So after reading all that the conclusion is he loves her? See deceit of the highest order. Na how men dey deceive themselves until their brain catches up

      Delete
    4. Hanty you sef stop asking him questions about the relationship. You're confusing his confusion.

      Delete
    5. I agree with Web Pamphlet

      Poster, the guy loves you!

      You are over pressuring him in my own opinion

      Since you are not ready for marriage yourself, enjoy your relationship!

      Don't give all of you to him, since you are scared of heartbreak!

      If he's yours, with time things will fall in well for both of you!

      Don't use over calculations and lose a good man!

      Also create a little room in your heart to get to know other people (no sex please), so you will have choices too!

      All the best!

      Delete
    6. anon 17:49 and web pamphlet. what do you 2 have 2 gain from massaging this girl's ego like this? I hate false hope ehn.

      Delete
    7. I got married to my husband when he was 28. A 28 year old person knows what he wants. Sometimes, it is not a function of the age

      Delete
    8. 18:15, it's like your brain is paining you! Are you sure you are ok at all? Sad idiots always want everyone sad with them. Because someone is dotting on her, you want to die right? Smell off abeg!

      That's how desperation to be Mrs lands most of you in sad commitment! Of what use is it to her to leave someone that truly loves her just to bear Mrs?

      Tomorrow she will turn to wicked madam and mother in law because of lack of pure love from her partner.

      Poster if you like allow them deceive you here!

      You got him scared with the marriage questions. He is 27 and not 37. Let him be prepared for such commitment first before taking that step. For now enjoy the love since you are not yet ready for marriage too.

      Bye

      Delete
    9. 18:31 , me too! Husband was 28 i was 23

      Delete
    10. Anon 19:50 stfu abeg. Desperation has landed YOU in the sad position of crying under comments section when u are faced with bitter reality. Desperation has landed YOU in the position of stooping so low to get naive girls to lower their self esteem to make your miserable low value self feel better. Eyaaaa. Very sure you go reason your miserable life this night. If u don't then 600 yrs for you mumu. Ode

      Delete
    11. Anon 19:43 the real ODe here is you. Your brain dey smell. Infact e dey leak. So in all this story this poster put all you saw was that the guy loves her??. Eya.. ode buruku. That is what you are. I'm very sure them dey chop u osho free n ur case pass poster own. That is if this is not poster herself. If it is I pity u gan. No dey send Chronicle n ask for advice if u can't handle bitter truth continue with the sweet deceit. Now I see why men easily DECEIVE YOU FOOLS!! If u like no wake up. My smart brain has landed me MARRIED TO A GOOD MAN. So you failed in your analysis. Your own relationship advice has landed you where exactly?!! Oh that's right responding defensively and bitterly under my comment and still getting USED AND DUMPED. Have a lovely day! #endsars

      Delete
    12. I think he is not ready financially. Probably thinking of going to Canada πŸ™„

      Delete
    13. Poster, take Palmphlet and Anonymous 17.49.

      Relax, enjoy our relationship. Not all relationships are ment to even end in marriage. You said yourself that you won't be read for another 3years which is good. Spread pout and have fun. The glow from it will even attract more suitors and you will have your pick when you are ready. Stop asking him jamb question eh...27year old guy, haba. Apply wisdom, don't shut every potential suitors out. Play Nengi on them. Seeing this will also keep him on his toes. Don't forget to build your career and finances in preparation.

      Delete
    14. Please poster leave this nonsense about talking in the futuristic . Do u know how many guys spoke in the futuristic before I met my husband even when it was glaring they were lying? Whether he said 'we' or 'us' doesn't matter. What matters is action.
      Please which one is a man of little words ? Does that stop him from being responsible? Abeg use your head o. Men know what we love to hear.

      Delete
  2. You did so many things together including praying and having sex?
    How do you ladies do it?
    Do you have sex before you pray or pray before you have sex and to which of the gods.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. JudginaπŸ˜€πŸ€£
      It's only in naija we still reason like sex is a crime and what what
      Even pastors and Reverend fathers that teach these things fornicate more than us
      You see a lady say she had sex consensual
      So they should not pray about issues in their lives?
      Abeg be calming down you hear!!

      Delete
    2. I saw that too @15:14.
      What a combo"❗

      "*We had it, yeah* but we spent more time bonding( talking, doing movies, *praying*, discussion abt our career et al)"

      Poster, decide who you want to live for.

      Delete
    3. @La Bella
      Consensual sex is not a crime. No one is talking about crime (flouting the laws of the state) here.
      She mentioned prayers and that automatically brings the issues of "God and morality" into it. So that
      brings the issue of "sin" (flouting the laws of God) to the fore. And that was why the question, which god?
      Yes, because that will help us to know and understand why fornication to her is like eating ice cream.

      Delete
    4. Nothing to do with being a judgina. Which of the gods is she praying to?
      Quoting the poster... He is catholic and i am pentecostal...? Meaning they should be christians right and live according to the scriptures.
      Poster, do you read the bible at all...? Please repent of fornication, i beg you in Jesus name. We're warned in scriptures not to fornicate because fornicators will not inherit the kingdom of God.
      poster please repent and stop - it seems like you dont see a problem with what you have been doing.
      God loves you and will forgive you. This is why Jesus Christ died, so we would no longer live a life of unrighteousness.
      Dont live your life by what others are doing - let God by His Holy Spirit through the scriptures guide you please.
      Poster, you sound confused though, why be in such a serious relationship when you also are not ready for marriage?
      Maybe you shouldnt date anyone until you know you are ready to marry. The guy sounds like he was mirroring your own language of not being ready and this has led to uncertainty.

      Delete
    5. 🀣🀣🀣

      Delete
    6. Ok but all judgement aside, even If they are both atheists most relationship experts will tell you that men are hardwired to chase after sex. Once u give it to them, then the thrill of the hunt is over. This is from a completely non religious point of view so do with that what u will. Of course there are cases where some people are exceptions and that is if and only if God has ordained that relationship to work. There will be no hardship getting the guy to commit even if the girl has had sex with the guy. But to be on the safe side women should act like they r not the exception

      Delete
    7. @ la bella Chicago . Sex is not a crime yea. But you wanna focus on what works and gives you the relationship you want right? Even if it means denying your self the desires of the flesh. If u are truly getting the kind of commitment you desire after having premarital sex then fine it works for you and you have no need to crucify the Judginas. Let each person do what works for them biko cus we all have different experiences in life and lessons learned..

      Delete
  3. When a man says something please believe him.
    Don't ever take the words of a man at face value.

    πŸ•ŠπŸ•ŠπŸ•Š

    ReplyDelete
  4. Baby girl, that guy is just using you for free and convenient sex. Sorry to break it to you. When a man sees what he wants he wastes no time locking it down so no other man has access to it. From your write up your intuition is telling you what you need to hear but you want us to lie to you on the blog and tell you he will marry you. You want us to tell you he will change his mind. Sorry. No such luck. The guy has used his own mouth to tell you the that he won't marry you. Please stop prolonging the inevitable hurt by putting soothing words to mask the truth. It's done it's done. If you want to ever have a chance at a long term union in marital bliss I suggest you move on. Cus a man like this will have no problems making u the permanent bed buddy even when he is married.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. This is why the bad ones will keep deceiving you women and you people will be losing good men. Always forming too wise!

      Delete
    2. anon 17:45 I reject it in the name of JESUS. It is YOU and your SISTERS that the bad ones will continue to keep deceiving. in Jesus name. Amen. If you want to remain BLIND to the truth just to continue giving yourself false hope then have a field day. The rest of us that have been heartbroken and actually LEARNED from our mistakes will continue to make good relationship choices, while you wallow in sweet lies and self deceit all because you are too WEAK and dickmatized to get out of the soul ties that you have put yourself in.

      definition of insanity = doing the same ole thing and expecting a different result. only A FOOL makes the same mistakes twice. a moron makes the same mistake over and over again. are you a fool or a moron? or will you learn from your mistakes?? Poster if this is you giving yourself hope under all these comments, I FEEL VERY VERY VERY SORRY FOR YOU! A word is enough If you like, don't wake up and smell the coffee ehn. If I am forming too wise, it is because I have made the mistakes n LEARNED from them. you too LEARN,. LEARNNNN! and stop being bitter, clueless and foolish!

      Delete
    3. anon 17:45 forming too wise yes but still making better relationship choices than you! Do you wanna remain foolish and clueless forever? sending chronicle after chronicle hoping for deception to massage your ego only to get angry when commenters alert you to the stupidity of your ways? or will you wake up?

      P.S the fact that a man settles for you because you were the complacent and patient and long suffering woman in his life that refused to leave DOES NOT make you his dream girl that he actually cherishes. But better believe that once that dream girl surfaces in his life, it won't matter to him how long you have been with him, it won't matter to him that you are married with kids. HE WILL LEAVE YOU FOR HER in a heartbeat. Stop being compliant PLACEHOLDERS in men's lives then wondering why they start acting somehow or leave to marry another woman. UNA MUMU NEVER DO??!!

      Delete
    4. ANon 17:45 Pele o. expert in relationship affairs and male psychology. How successful have YOUR attempts with men been? If you're still with a man that you are subtly pursuing and trying to pressure him into do things to please you, then abeg YOU SHOULD CLOSE YOUR MOUTH. And from this your defensive response, it is very clear that you are not the IT girl in the life of the man you're seeing. Pele o. maybe when he moves on to one of the girls "forming wise" you too will wisen up by then. olodo

      Delete
    5. anon 17:45 na your business be that. weyrey dey disguise. it is clear what i said struck a nerve, resonated with you and struck a nerve again! Continue in that dead end relationship o. na one of the girls "forming wise" on this blog go snatch your man finally. And you will still run here to ask us question about how someone use kayanmata to snatch ur man not knowing it is brain that you were given and refused to use. no be curse o. just unavoidable fact of life. IF IT PAINS YOU, THEN DO BETTER. SIMPLE! Have a lovely day #endsars

      Delete
    6. anon 17:45 ok you that is wise, where has your wiseness taken you too?!!oh exactly! led you right here to menstruate under a comment offering good advice because you are pained that the comment described your situation wella! don't open your eyes o. remain dumb forever. as for me commments like this have helped my choice of man n helped me avoid bad men n now I AM GETTING MARRIED TO A GOOD MAN

      Delete
    7. Anon 17:45 shior. Who be this one? Una never tire to dey waste years of una life with time wasters.? Una never tire of losing in relationships?. Ok keep on. I sure say u be one player and u dey para because your game has been exposed
      time is up! Alaye siddon for one place jor. Na all these forming wise advice dey help me most times cus when I was stupid guys dey show me pepper. Now na me dey show them pepper

      Delete
    8. Ask yourselves why marriages are packing up. The deceptive ones know all these yen yen yen rules. They trap you people with it! When you get in fire starts burning yours ass.

      Meanwhile the good guy who wasn't ready truthfully because he needed to build, you dumped him because you are too wise. When you finally rush out of that marriage and he is far gone doing great, your eyes will open.

      Women always judging their lives with popular opinions and forming silly wise!

      Bad boys know these rules and play it out for you people since your heads like touching like electric wire!

      Delete
    9. Ogbeni abi madam, anon 19:50 close your mouth abeg. So after reading this sweet advice that is all you can come up with?? Oh pls save ur breath for the naive girls you dey deceive wey never tear eye. Gone are the days when we dey reason all these "I'm not financially ready" excuses.a man that wants a woman will GET financially ready n do all it takes to lock the woman he wants down. Dey there dey deceive who no get experience. They can listen and believe you sha. Not me. You are actually one of those bad men in disguise wasting girls time using their money to level yourself up then when you are done using them you will leave for the woman you really desire. Weyrey dey disguise true true. Kmt Abeg no dey use that format dey deceive yourself not us. Our eye don clear. Ole!

      Delete
  5. You are Pentecostal and he is Catholic
    Really?
    Do the Pentecostal or catholic doctrine
    espouse fornication as a norm?
    Please come under my comments and answer.

    ReplyDelete
  6. The guy will break up with you as soon as he gets more booty. Many Igbo men have plenty ego and don't like it when women are the first to break a relationship. The gist with your father na format. Carry your shoes for hand and run now now πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. You don't say. Tell me more

      Delete
    2. I am Igbo and agree our men have plenty ego. It has to do with our way of life. Besides, women do not 'suggest' marriage to an Igbo man.
      If he wants to marry you he will propose and marry you within that same month or two (both traditionally and in church).
      They don't waste time because they take time to build up their wealth and houses ready for their new wife.

      Poster, has he taken you to meet his parents? If not, forget it because that guy won't marry you. That's our Igbo men for you. ✌️✌️

      Delete
  7. The guy is absolutely bemused and possibly not ready for marriage now

    ReplyDelete
  8. Yoruba ladies pls be careful with igbo guys o. I met one recently, very fine as igbo guys usually are, but he has not even asked me to be his gf or said anything to suggest that he wants a serious commitment yet already he saying he wants me to cook for him, pamper him etc.

    Yoruba ladies are trained to be long suffering and pamper their men almost like doormats regardless of how he treats them. Plenty igbo guys know this and try to target n date yoruba girls for this main reason, most times knowing fully well that they will never marry her. Please please and please shine your eye. If you have igbo female friends, ask them the format. Most of them will tell you they didn't lift a finger to cook or clean for their igbo husband before he proposed. A man that loves you will not need for you to prove anything to him before he takes you seriously. Pls be wary.

    To simplify it for yourself, just remember a man that has not invested time, money, effort, energy etc into you should not have access to your ultimate treasure ie what is in between your legs and other goodies. You are the prize he is working to get. Let him use someone else as maid and sex beast while u enjoy your peace of mind and free yourself of soul ties. His preeq may betray him to think that is what he wants for a while, but his nature and hardworking will take over inevitably and make him seek out a high value woman. That is what happens when a man starts dragging his feet on marrying n committing to a woman he has been smashing for years. No shade

    ReplyDelete
  9. My fellow yoruba women, be careful when dating igbo guys ooo. I know yoruba demons are worse but my own advice to dating an igbo guy is close your legs n don't give too much of yourself to avoid any regrets. I know they are fine and delicious to look at. Igbo men have this seductive sort of manliness that yoruba women find irresistible but pls pull your self and your legs together n try to hold on to your sanity. If possible, avoid being alone with him cus body no be firewood

    ReplyDelete
  10. Hehehe igbo men. Yoruba women's kryptonite since 1986. Even though they like to deny. Mostly it is fear of the guy's family that makes a yoruba woman avoid an igbo man. But forget, on a normal day, yoruba women go crazy for igbo men. Esp cus of that taking care of their women" thing that this lady mentioned in her Chronicle.

    ReplyDelete
  11. What I gathered from your chronicles are things that are not proposal or "will you please marry me"
    "We die there,
    I care about you
    I am committed to you
    Let's be together and see where it leads
    You are more than just a fling
    This is something serious, not a booty call,
    Can I talk to your dad on phone" and so on
    Do you know what all these things are?
    Sweet words to ensure that the cookie jar is never closed!
    I don't understand why you are freaking out because he said
    he will not marry you. Did he say at anytime in your interaction and sexual liaisons say that he will marry you??
    Please free this guy and have time to
    reflect you you life and eternal life.

    ReplyDelete
  12. Sis una for just remain in that consensual sex space!
    Oya step back and calm your emotions
    You went in too deep!!

    ReplyDelete
  13. We pray and had sex got me rolling on d ground

    ReplyDelete
  14. My dear that man is not ready to settle down with you he has already made it soo obvious with the way he answers your questions, So pls if possible keep him as a good friend and remove every emotional feelings you have for him okay and I like the way you sound very intelligent so be wise ok.

    ReplyDelete
  15. Babes move on biko. I'm on my knees begging. I had this igbo guy I dated before i met my husband. Caring to a fault but when it comes to issue of marriage, he would always say let's wait until then. He even introduced me to his mum but his mum was against us becoming an item cos of the tribal difference. He would reaffirm that he knows what he is doing.

    I left o babes, didnt even break up proper, just moved on before someone would waste my time further .

    So please igbo men and yoruba girls no be here o

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Please do not generalize. Igbos and Yorubas do marry.

      Lovelace

      Delete
  16. Abeg leave this time waster before he'll use you to pass time until he's ready to settle down.
    I hope you read the chronicle of the doctor who was led on by her colleague?
    Biko compare and contrast.

    ReplyDelete
  17. Take a walk sis,he is shifty!! Those questions he asked you will be and are serious issues for him and his family.

    ReplyDelete
  18. You're right to leave, don't look back. Don't let anyone waste your time and emotions. He'll come up with excuses later when you're already invested in it. Leave now that you really can. I don't always advice rebound relationships, always give yourself time to heal.

    ReplyDelete
  19. Poster please move on.This guy is not ready to settle down.Just remain friends with him without benefits.

    Lovelace

    ReplyDelete
  20. Igbo men usually marry late from late 30's up n i dont knw why. Dis guy is just 27 n u are 28,babe move on

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. because they want to wait until they are financially ready to take care of a family which I actually commend. any man using a woman for her money loses respect in my eyes

      Delete
  21. Sis, you are intelligent, I give it to you.
    It's either you keep it at sex Leven only or you bounce.
    This dude will change mouth later. There are inconsistencies with his attitude.
    Just keep meeting other people and living your life. If he actually wants you long term, he will do something to secure it and will eliminate any point of doubts that may arise from his side!

    I'm Igbo, that an igbo guy cares and treats you like am egg doesn't mean he wants to marry you.
    It's just the way we have thought them to treat us (their women)
    So, don't fall for all that without your senses intact.
    In order words, if he's not walking the talk, then treat him like a booty call. yeah! You know what i mean.
    Wish you luck.

    ReplyDelete
  22. So long a letter, chai

    Poster may the good Lord help you.

    ReplyDelete
  23. dont put all your eggs in 1 basket...date others no sex

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  24. Okay so dis chronicle made me faint and woke up lol. Speechless

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  25. that guy na time waster, just play along until u get someone serious then u move... never to look back, guide ur heart seriously for now.

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  26. Omg what kind of stressful relationship is this one ehhn. Poster you are just stressing that guy seriously with your plenty questions and always seeking for assurance from him.

    Take this marriage questions easy on him please,that's all I can say now.You are confusing the guy abeg.

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  28. You are with a time waster!

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  29. Poster you should have spoken to his family members first and use their opportunity to gauge their reception towards you. You put the cart before the horse by letting him speak to your dad. That way you will take your time to build a bond with these people from your relationship with his people you will know where the relationship is headed trust me. So if you really want to wait for this guy his level of seriousness would be to engage you with his parents. If he is not willing to do that at any point in time. Pls pack your load count your losses and move on.

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  30. Poster please what's with the plenty questions na? Even me sef if a man be asking me too many times like this I will start feeling pressured and withdraw. Can't you just enjoy the relationship and go with the flow? So what if he tells you what you want to hear and still do otherwise?
    Cool down and let things flow naturally

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  31. Honestly poster i don't understand the colour of your problem, (1) he is not with you for sex (2) you initiated a relationship just for sex purpose so what is the ish now? (3) you have said ut countless times that he loves you more and he has even made attempt to speak with your father, have you gotten to know his own family? (4) you said yourself that you wanted to wait another 2 to 3 years cos you are not ready. Please do him a favour and tell him like it is. You don't want to risk an igbo, catholic, younger boo relationship and stop manipulating him to think it's his fault. No relationship is guaranteed until you say 'i do'. Pls let the guy go it's not like you love him and be mature enough to tell him so.

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  32. Poster forget, you’re desperate for marriage abeg. You’re not ready yet you’re putting so much pressure on this young man. You need to learn to be alone first before even embarking on anything relationship. Love yourself because you seriously lack that self love. Leave that young man alone and let him know you’re not ready for a relationship. Put actions into your words! Yoruba Pentecostal and Catholic Igbo man, hmm you never see something. You dey allow emotions cloud your common sense. Na you sabi because you’ll be the one to go through heart break again not us.

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  33. Truth is, he is truly in love, but most igbo guys have a planned out mindset from the get-go, and any female that doesn't fit into that mindset is most likely not the one. this is the secret/trick to it; enter into his mindset, see where you fit it, if the do's re more than the don'ts, show him/let him know and he'll break barriers for your sake. Alot of people don't know this, hence they leave when the thin line is visible!

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