Stella Dimoko Korkus.com: Chronicle Of Blog Visitor Narrative....

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Friday, October 23, 2020

Chronicle Of Blog Visitor Narrative....

Hmmmmmm....na wah!!!









STAND ALONE NARRATIVE

CONFUSED



Hi Stella,

I've never really been lucky with relationships because of the many unresolved issues I had. I had admirers but I never allowed any get too close. I had a hard time opening up to people, and most of the guys were not patient enough to stick around and find out why I was the way I was.



Now to my story obviously relationship wahala. I met Dav many years ago, we were young and he wanted an open relationship at that time and I wasn't open to that cos I was in a bad place and that could have worsened my state, so we opted to being friends instead. 


We did catch up once once but we never became a thing. Towards the end of Last year, Dav got back into town, we reconnected and the sparks was still there. We had a good time but no s#x happened, the pressure was much from him so I stayed away cos nothing was defined. 


He eventually went back to his base early February. He's invited me over but that guy is a case. I've not gone. He cares about me that I know, I needed him once and he didn't pull away. I wanted to find out what he's been upto all the years we were apart, and I found a trad pic of him. I questioned him on chat and he went on to say, it never worked out. I asked why, he said he's not ready to explain yet but I should just know he's not a married man.


 I visited his family house when he was in town, and he reminded me that if he was married he won't take me there with the family around and all. He'll be coming around again later this year, and he wants us to try again and see where it'll take us. Don't know if I should loosen up and give it a try.


Ams is another guy...Met him in 2018.From the first day I met him, he's been bent on having an exclusive relationship. I'm not in any way attracted to him and we don't connect that well maybe cos I've not let him in fully. We worship in the same church. You know in church everyone is holy and reserved.


 He sees me as that very reserved girl but I had my issues. He came around when I was at my lowest. I never gave him the chance to even come close enough cos I wasn't ready to open up to a stranger, worse off someone I see all the time in church. I avoided his advances, he went around asking questions about me and all that thing men do when looking for a wife. He's been around ever since, reminding me he's still there cos we see most times during services. He's been ringing it in my ears that he wants to settle down.


November, 2019. I visited a different church cos they had a programme for singles. During prayers, the pastor prophesied that we should write down on any card dates we would like to meet the one to settle down with. I wrote down 28 Dec of last year. During prayers the pastor actually mentioned my own date which was only known to me cos we never submitted the card.

The first guy and I were suppose to meet that month when he came into town but a lot played out and I ended up seeing him on 29th. The only guy that I saw on that prophesied date was Ams the second guy and it happened spontaneously I only realised it after the day had passed. He literally looked for me and came searching cos we had an event.


This year, God has been faithful, I'm in a good place today. I can let someone in and not bother about rubbing off the wrong way cos I've healed from all the trauma. I never told the second guy anything about me and relationships all the times he asked. I avoided the question and his advances so maybe he thought I was seeing someone but I was single. Just not in a good place. Well, I've let my guard down a bit. 


The last time we had a chat he said he's still Single. I made the chat much welcoming but he's not as intense as he used to be anymore. I know when a guy is into me. He used to call and check up a lot before but now that has stopped too. I do the check up most times and the chats are not progressive.


Should I let him be and focus on someone else or should I come out and clearly tell him I wasn't in any relationship all along. I know he'd ask why I never said so since and I really don't want that question cos it'll get me to start going back to where I was before. Or should I try again with the first guy. 


Please I need your advice. The state of mind I'm at right now is all I needed for a relationship to thrive so I've no regrets for not dating anyone before this time. I was a mess and needed to find myself.





Hmmm,this your chronicle dey turn me for eyes......So so long story on top wetin?..Date whoever gives you peace of mind my dear and stop making it a must that whoever dates you must marry you or come with Marriage intentions....Some of the Marriages you standing strong were not planned.....RELAX!!

36 comments:

  1. U seem closed off.what are u even hiding? U no fine? Your wahala plenty my dear.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I'm trying to understand. Poster, you still sound off. You haven't yet healed from your troubles. Dav is bad news. Someone that even considers an open marriage is not someone you want to be with. Since you're desperate for marriage, I advise that you leave love and attraction one side and scrutinize your suitors thoroughly. Since love no dey, make sure you're settling for the best. Ask around about your suitors my dear. No be only men dey like better thing. Ask around so that you dont end up with a beater or a chronic cheat or a wicked or a lazy or stingy man.

      Delete
    2. There is always a 28th of December. Wait for the one of 2020 as you're now ready let's see who you'd meet

      Delete
  2. Ruuuuuun from Dave. He's not ready to talk about it, my foot. Ams goes to Church, that does not make him a good person. Shine ya eyes o. Do not be desperate, that you'll settle for just any guy.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Sorry I can't stand people like you who keep people around knowing you have your issues! By the way, you sound like someone who would make people feel bad for nothing just because you are not in a good place while around you. I'm glad he's not that into you anymore. Sort yourself please!

      Delete
  3. In all, I read what "Pastor" told you, I never read what the Lord Jesus told you. Don't you pray to him and allow him to lead you? Must the pastor hear from God and tell you?
    You did not tell us why you did not "like" the Amy guy, that is very important. Take time to pray and fast, learn that as a habit and you won't struggle with all these issues about whom to marry.

    ReplyDelete
  4. I think I agree with Stella to an extent. Don't rush into marriage. First of all, figure out what you want in a man, then prayerfully look out for it.

    Personally, I don't like the first guy. I dislike guys who just shut me out like that, if we are going to be in a relationship, Uncle, you need to open up to me.

    I think I prefer Ams o, but figure out infact, write down what you want first. Take it to God in prayer and He will guide your steps.

    For now, relax and enjoy. Every phase of life is temporary, enjoy your singlehood while it lasts.

    Much love.

    ReplyDelete
  5. Poster,What happened to you?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. For a better judgement she should have said what happened...she may not have healed from what she is trying to hide from us.

      Delete
  6. Jeeze.
    Lost interest while reading.
    I jst read Stella's comment 🤨🙄

    ReplyDelete
  7. Poster are you sure you are in a good place now. You sound gloomy and full of regrets. Please take care of yourself first before venturing into a relationship. Good Luck.

    Lovelace

    ReplyDelete
  8. Just tell the second guy you weren't in any relationship and tell him not to ask you further questions that you might explain later, if he's still into you, he will open up.
    Pele complicated sister.

    ReplyDelete
  9. My dear, relax, take a deep breadth and focus on you.The right one will find you. It's great you r in a good place now mentally. You need to be more open. Nothing is cast in brick and mortar. Beware of the first guy you found his trad pic,ask questions.That he took you to family house doesnt count. Dont put any pressure on the second guy, if hes still serious,you will know. Above all, never get desperate, you ll regret it!

    ReplyDelete
  10. My dear pray to God Almighty to direct you, all these prophecies sometimes are not correct,pray God will direct you

    ReplyDelete
  11. You are just making everything look complicated. you are still not ready for relationship or marriage. You are still all over the place. Life is not ashad as you are making it of not na BP get you o.

    ReplyDelete
  12. Take him out on a date and don't act like you're looking for love. Just say you need someone to talk to. Ask about his work not family, talk about general stuff then maybe after the
    meal, break it to him why you kept to yourself that period and that you were also single but was not emotionally ready for any relationship. After the discussion and food and banter. Just smile and say you're happy to be back to your normal self again and meeting people and you're grateful to God for that. Don't push anything, pay for the food, and thank him for being a good friend with a listening ear. End it there. If he still wants you, trust me he will look for you again but if he doesn't then move on dear. Don't be tied to any prophecy.

    ReplyDelete
  13. The only thing I understand in your chronicle is that your so called ‘admirer ‘ or ‘friend ‘ took you to his Family House after you had seen a Traditional Wedding Photo of him which he shrugged off and told you he couldn’t have taken you to the Family House if he was married. I laugh at you in Swahili . You’ve not seen Family members that will know a Man is married and help in cover up in front of his Girlfriend. You’ve not seen a Married Man whose Mother helped to pretend he wasn’t married to another Woman so that she can help him get a loan in a Bank she was managing and he vamoosed to America with his Wife and Three Children. You’re so naive you never see anything!!!

    ReplyDelete
  14. Sincerely you seem and sound complicated...i dont even understand you and you seem not to understand yourself too...take it easy with yourself...

    ReplyDelete
  15. Sincerely you seem and sound complicated...i dont even understand you and you seem not to understand yourself too...take it easy with yourself...

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. @mdee exactly. She just sounded all over the place!

      Delete
  16. All the story on top marriage? See no perfect human yet just fellow your hrt!

    ReplyDelete
  17. Meet someone new please. Even though your story is just upside down.

    ReplyDelete
  18. Sometimes una go dey complicate things for una self.
    Abeg no long thing. Date who gives you peace, if it doesn't work you move on. Life is too short to be writing this kinda chronicle wey no get head or tail

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I don't agree less...e no get head, middle and tail. Something happened to you, you can't open up and you want us to help you out. See ehn, you can't play God, You obviously chose the day that guy was coming and you are acting as if you wrote the date spontaneously, my friend marry who you choose and let live.

      Delete
  19. Honestly, I don't understand the colour of this chronicle. Let those who understand advise you.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. 🤪😳🤪😳🤪😳🤪 chronicles don dey get colour no?? Lol!!!

      Poster, you are still not sounding emotionally strong to start a relationship.

      You seems to be so secretive and naive.

      Look life happens even to the best of us, settle your ish and embrace LIFE!!!!!

      Delete
  20. Which kind round about chronicle is this one? Poster u r really a confused person... Stay one place

    ReplyDelete
  21. Poster, You haven't healed one bit. From all you narrated, you are still gloomy and a mystery, you don't even understand yourself. The Ams guy has been there all these while trying to get your attention, and you seemed closed off. Now, you think you are ready, he seemed so tired and no longer interested that is why your chats with him are so cold now. But I bet, if he loosens up and come wooing you again, you will still close your mind again against him. The truth is you haven't healed and you will be so toxic if you go into a relationship like this. You are so bland and your type of blandness na carry come. You drive men away from you unknowingly by your attitude. May God heal you from whatever you are suffering from.

    ReplyDelete
  22. Poster
    That Dave is bad news. Ruuuuuun!
    Forget the family house thingy, so many families cover up for their married sons when he brings a new girl home especially if he helps them out financially.
    The second guy, you can open up to him but don't expect it to lead to marriage, just flow with the relationship

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yes, it appears that Dave is hiding something. He is not being straight with you. The other one seems to have moved on, so you may now have competition. My dear in all pray to God for direction and shine your eyes well well. Another one might come.

      Delete
  23. Dear poster, the first guy is too complicated for you, especially considering where are you coming from.

    Why don't you consider the second guy. Explore a relationship with him, with the guidance from the Holy Spirit and kindly keep sex out of it.

    God's grace

    ReplyDelete
  24. This chronicle be like buhari speech,after hi Stella,I no understand any thing again, please someone that understands should break it down for me

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 make una have mercy on me this night ooooooh, I am having a good laugh reading through the comments.
      Hilarious BVs!!!

      Delete
  25. Follow the second guy ,I mean the church guy but please try to be emotionally available and don't stress him with your past cos it seems the guy has been so stressed from chasing you already eventually got tired.

    But please no need to open up to him about your past but if you see he is no more into you,discontinue ,but for now try to be more friendly with him but,,,

    DON'T CHASE HIM!.

    ReplyDelete
  26. Leave both men alone! You have a serious baggage and you’ll drained a man emotionally that he’ll shut off completely from you. Go and work on your self woman. You’re desperate to settle down yet you have a lot going on. See a professional therapist to work through your emotions, trauma and past hurt. We don’t know what happened to you but Nne, work on YOU.

    ReplyDelete

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