Stella Dimoko Korkus.com: Chronicle Of Blog Visitor Narrative....

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Wednesday, November 25, 2020

Chronicle Of Blog Visitor Narrative....

 Hmmmmmmmmm......



STAND ALONE NARRATIVE
BETWEEN RUM AND VODKA



Stella please keep me anonymous....
Good day stella I'm a regular here ,I'm 22 and I'm a student .....

After this chronicle I know say dem go drag me like small Gen, but it's cool hopefully I get one helpful advice

So yeah ,There's  Mr. Rum and Mr. Vodka (not real names )


Rum is my current boyfriend we have been dating for 4 years now right immediately I got admitted into the university and i just rented a place with him so yeah we cohabiting .

He is a very hardworking man, really prayerful and loves me to bits
I cheated on him and I told him, he forgave me and we moved on
The problem : I didn't fall in love with him persay I got comfortable with life with him because it was convenient..

*usually have bouts of depression which he just waves off by saying "if you see people with depression you'll run"

*the feeling I get is the type of feeling you get when you live with your parents and you're looking forward to going into the real world soon..

*I've always wanted to leave our current location after school but baba dreams of settling there it scares me..

*he emotionally blackmails me with things that have happened between us
BUT I Honestly care for him and I would rather be hurt than to hurt him ..

He's been through alot for and with me,I feel like I owe him......


Then vodka....

I met him about a month ago on social media ,we haven't met in person because we are not in the same space and neither of us is genuinely disposed to travel atm. I recently mentioned to him about the fact that I easily lose focus in tasks and my depression and the next morning, he registered me in and online support group for people who might be depressed and he's been sending me messages every morning reminding me things that need to be done based on the information I give him the night before and reasons why I can't afford to lose concentration so easily In life every morning. 


His mantra even if we cant be together is I want you to win ...

Problem
*he has a ten year old daughter with a white woman
*he is 30 I'm not used to the difference
*I haven't met him before
*I'm falling for him at a very fast rate it scares me .....
* I never use my eye see am and baba dey talk marriage But
If he is anything like I think he is and as sincere as he comes off he is everything I sincerely pray for in a pattern.


Note I did not include the networth of either men because to me it is insignificant in my decision making
I can work!.
Then there is me
Smart, honest kind selfless curious scared girl 

Problem

* i haven't learnt how to decide for myself because I guess I've always had people to do it for me..

*I'm so scared about the future I tend to always take the easier route..

*I'm too flexible I can be anything anyone wants me to be and I really don't know what I want for myself But I love myself and if I don't end up with these two guys I want to be able to look back and not regret anything. 

Take it easy on me please 打
Stellz ma plenty hailings oo to you and the bvs





First they behave like Vodka and then become like Rum......
He has never seen you and is proposing Marriage?who des that?Do you really think Vodka is better than Rum?Hmmm,my dear in your case,it would be better to chose the devil you know,otherwise you are setting up yourself for a heartbreak...
You are not a kid at 22 so you need to start behaving like one OK?

74 comments:

  1. Slow down with the falling else guys that will bang u ehn.. dey are gearing up, at your age it's easy to deceive u n get d cookie...hehehehehehehe

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I for advice you poster but Ayam not quite sure where exactly it would be coming from. This is because I am a lot like you. Today I am single and lonely. So all I will tell you is to learn to take responsibility and make good decisions. Own your shit and stay the course.

      Delete
  2. Nne Stay where you are. You'll never know what you have until you it's gone.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Babe, I will tell you the truth from a realistic angle;
      1. Stay where you are and enjoy it while it lasts.
      2. Make no commitment to Mr Rum and do not talk marriage with him.
      3. You are 22, that's the age where you struggle to figure out things and wonder where tomorrow is leading but I will tell you, take one day at a time, finish school, go for service and trust God.
      4. You will be fine. Give yourself the next 3 to 4 years and things will begin to take shape then is when you will be clear which of your endeavours you want to invest more in and make a career out of, what you want in a man, the kind of marriage you want; maturity will have begun to set in and your decisions will be less likely to land you in "had I known" situations.
      Don't be in a hurry. Calm down. You are fine. Just focus on graduating for now, have fun but be careful and keep safe.

      Delete
  3. Why don't you focus on your studies for Christ sakes! Your'e 22 years and cohabiting with a fellow student, i presume. Your'e performing all the wifely duties to a young boy like you may most likely not marry you.
    I can imagine you cooking, sweeping and washing his dresses as per uni girl friend.

    On the other hand, your'e tripping for someone who you just met a month ago and haven't even set your eyes on in the first place.

    Las las, na small pikin dey worry you. Focus on what they sent you to do in school and leave man wahalla for now, till your'e emotionally matured.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. How do you know she's not focused on her studies?
      Y'all must always judge

      Delete
    2. Washing his dresses?不不不不

      Please calm down, she didn't say the man was disabled or that he's a student!!

      Delete
  4. Very prayerful and cohabiting with a lady.... Wonderful 不

    On a serious note.... You need find yourself first....and know what you want.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. E shock you??? co habitant ko

      Delete
    2. E shock me too. Maybe he goes into fasting and prayer mode immediately after doing the "do".

      Delete
  5. When I saw “rum” and vodka I thought is drug and alcohol lol
    Poster how can you take a man that you haven’t seen serious that have already propose lol
    That proposal is to allow you to be free and do sex video or f**k him when he is around

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. thank you . when i saw that i was like "so guys still use promises of marriage to get sex in this day and age fa" anyway she's 22 so I guess they will think she is naive. the thing is that even at 22, I was not easily convinced to open legs cus i already learned from big sisters n brothers how guys lie to get u know what. Poster, I suggest u watch the man's actions. men can lie with their mouths but find it a bit difficult to lie consistently wit their actions.

      Delete
  6. Hmm! Implication!

    I f**kin* hate vodka, that sh*t dealt with me but might be good for you仄‍♀️.

    Rum sounds OK to me, but I don't think you that into him, so go try vodka if you can overlook the stated problems, if it works out fine, if it doesn't, oh well! You are still young.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I knew this post would be hilarious but didn't envisage your comment.

      Delete
  7. "He is a very hardworking man, really prayerful and loves me to bits"

    I see the Mr. Rum is working very hard on your cookie jar right?
    You fornicate and pray; to which "god?"
    Please cut out the hypocrisy.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. "You fornicate and prey; to which "god?"" Anonymous 15:17, let me tell you something, the same God that you worship; the God that gives unlimited opportunities for repentance; the God that keep her safe, watches over her, guides and protects her; the God that keeps her alive and has kept her alive to have a chance to know Him.

      The fact that you've come to know God doesn't mean that she can't/won't come to know Him. Everyone who comes to God come at different times. We all run our races differently.

      Delete
    2. @15:55
      Point of correction. A man can't be cohabiting with a lady he is not married to and be described as "very prayerful?"
      If someone wants to repent, he will repent and "go and sin no more..." like Jesus said in John 8

      Delete
    3. You are also a sinner and your own judgemental God with a small g is still managing you so please, leave her for her God to plan her own Damascus experience. Omniholiest.

      Delete
    4. Prayers and immorality cannot go together

      Delete
  8. Just concentrate and finish school first , the boyfriend you are cohabiting with doesn’t seem like a bad person, it’s a dog eat dog world out there, your live in lover sounds like a safe place for a girl like you, when you graduate and start working, life will take care of both of you without anyone getting hurt, ensure you are practicing safe sex or get on birth control to avoid pregnancy out of wedlock

    ReplyDelete
  9. Na life go teach you....time will come, u will look for rum, you will cry and beg, but he will turn away. then you will realize the value of what u had but lost

    ReplyDelete
  10. A typical Nigerian babe story, never know what they want, but like eating their cake and having it, you will be alright las las, here to read comments from her fellow men are scum members

    ReplyDelete
  11. Replies
    1. Lolzzzz,big time smash hitzzz

      Delete
    2. I think both wsnt to pass time with her.
      Chai...i wish she can take a step back and see what shes doing.

      Delete
  12. A typical Nigerian babe story, never know what she want, but like eating her cake and having it, you will be alright las las, here to read comments from her fellow men are scum members

    ReplyDelete
  13. To me I don't see you as a serious person and you are a spoilt brat. Quit hiding under the cloak of depression and face your education if you are still in school.

    What you sent in shows you're a carefree and not ready to take responsibilities.

    Lovelace

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks for typing for me. Better get on birth control now. Secondly, whoring dey hungry you. Please go and whore around, safely oo, then after you've seen it all, you can settle down.
      If you stick to mr a now, you'll always cheat on him cos your eye dey outside .
      Monogamy is a choice and you're clearly not ready.

      Delete
    2. Which kind birth control? Did her parents not give her money for accommodation? My friend leave that man's house and face your books.
      That's how they keep cohabiting and everytime you see them in one clinic or another treating "infection".

      Delete
  14. Wait until you meet the second guy first and then decide if you want to have a relationship with him. The fact that he has a 10 year old daughter shouldn’t be an issue. However, remember to find out if he’s still married.
    As for the first guy, I would say start by moving out of the place you share with him. It’s not good to co-habit with a man. Your studies and overall outlook to life will be affected. Move out from there, ask him to give you some space too. That you are comfortable with him and co-habited with for donkey years doesn’t mean marriage with him will work.
    Just move out, give yourself some space and freedom, work on getting into a good mental space, focus on completing your education with good grades first. Trust me, you’ll see clearer then.
    Don’t ever make life-changing decisions while you are depressed or desperate.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Good advise for her to move out if she can afford the accommodation.

      Delete
  15. I like you poster,I really do. I see sincerity in your post...

    The first step I think you should take should be to get your own apartment. I'm not saying break up with Rum but like you mentioned,you are yet to live life for you.
    You need to learn self stability,to be less dependable and more responsible for yourself.
    You are still so young my darling,a man shouldn't be your problem now if you are yet to understand yourself.

    You are attracted to Vodka cos he is older and more mature than your boyfriend and ofcourse has better experiences on how to handle issues like the depression you talked about.

    Rum is as young as you are,although committed but still going through life as well.

    Find yourself first my darling.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yh i like her sincerity thats why i felt so much for her.
      Such a young baby.

      Delete
  16. To me I don't see you as a serious person and you are a spoilt brat. Quit hiding under the cloak of depression and face your education if you are still in school.

    What you sent in shows you're a carefree and not ready to take responsibilities.

    Lovelace

    ReplyDelete
  17. The main problem I see here is the depression. And the cause? You cheapened yourself to a man by "co-habiting." That is the main reason for that emotional abuse that is contributing to this depression.
    Lady, you have to rise up from the ashes of emotional depravity and self worthlessness and embrace whom Jesus created you to be. There is nothing like a man "being prayerful" and treating a woman badly and fornicating too. How can someone pray to and love a God he does not see whereas he cannot love a woman created in God's image whom he sees?
    Mr. Rum does not love you. period.
    Mr. vodka is too forward and you can see some ??? Give your life to Christ and wait, focus on your studies and do not be dragged into marriage. Jesus will lead you to the right person.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I agree with 15:29. Let Jesus lead you right poster.

      Delete
    2. Give your life to Christ£ive your life to Christ. Have you for a second thought if the poster is a muslim? Everytime, repent. Mtchewwww

      Delete
    3. Shooter don vex oo 不不不不

      Delete
    4. This comment has been removed by the author.

      Delete
  18. Please, leave rum alone for who will appreciate him for whom he is! You've been cohabiting with a man that is not your husband for 4years, you're an unrepentant cheat and you're the best woman in the world

    Small madame, you don't know what you really want yet; when you do you will not write chronicles.

    ReplyDelete
  19. Stella on your red pen I have this to say to you, (easy tiger) my husband proposed to me over the phone, we have not seen physically but later he turned out to be the best man on earth.
    Poster u mean u are 22 with all these rum and vodka story hmmmm. White woman baby mama drama nobi hearooooh, shine your eyes, I will suggest u take your time,build ur career, up ur game and go to God in prayer for answers, pls give ur life to christ. You need him more than anything.

    ReplyDelete
  20. You sound a bit needy with the whole depression line.

    Focus on being self sufficient, you don't need people to draw you out of depression, you need Christ.

    Infact, give your life to Christ and He will order your steps.

    O dabo

    ReplyDelete
  21. 不@rum & vodka
    First you are too young to be writing chronicles
    Nobody deserves to tie her/himself to another out of pity and obligation.
    So get out of that cohabiting issh and face your fears.
    I don't know whether vodka is better or will be better than rum , you will have to get to know him truly before you can tell.
    In my opinion whatever you had for rum is over.
    You need to leave it behind else you cannot move further.
    Its your choice to want to get to know vodka better or leave as well and move on to what the future will present.
    But chai poster na wa o, at 18 you were already doing mummy and daddy with one boy for good 4years now? You tried oooooo
    I can't fit to imagine sef lol

    ReplyDelete
  22. Sweetie at 22 you are too young to be in this type of triangle. At this age please be more focused on yourself... i wish the things i know now, i knew when i was 22. I advice my younger sister who's just 2 years younger than you to forget about men for now. Focus on your education please dear. Now is the time to take courses. The best decision I ever made at 22 was enrolling in an aviation school. And now I'm reaping the benefits. Forget about these men making decisions for you in the name of love.
    Lord I wish I can meet you in person. This is all wrong dear; Both vodka and rum.

    ReplyDelete
  23. I just had this weird feeling that today's chronicle will crack me up不不不不 I literally had this same conversation in my head before now. @poster, I'm sorry for laughing but mehn I've nothing to say不不不不不

    ReplyDelete
  24. Poster, why don't you focus on your education and leave men matter alone for now. You will still meet other men from there you can make your choice.

    ReplyDelete
  25. At 22, a student, face your studies first , other things follow

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. When people are saying face your studies it seems somehow, but my dear it is one of the best advice you can get.

      Delete
  26. Foolish girl. The time you would have spent discovering yourself and minding your studies you’re using it to cohabit and play low budget house with a boy in school.

    Did you fall from the sky? No family member has come to check out where you stay at school? You don’t have friends? Other priorities? It’s to be doing wife that’s your problem.

    And being the mumu that you are, someone just shows you a bit of attention and you’re already sending chronicles laced with confusion.

    I don’t advise people like you, you’ll learn from experience. All those mumu girls that cohabited while we were in Uni I don’t know any of them that married their school’s boyfriends or had time to build a rounded social life. You people will graduate and you’ll come back and tell us your story.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Lol. You're harsh, but you've told her the plain truth. I hope she listens

      Delete
  27. Poster, that vodka giving you attention and acting all good is denying his main babe attention.
    Don't use because of small flirt and leave Rum, unless you want to lose home and abroad.

    ReplyDelete
  28. Vodka is married with at least one child. That I can assure you. And all he wants is sexting. You're never ever going to see him in person.

    ReplyDelete
  29. The grass always look greener at the other side. Stay where you are. More so be careful of online boyfriend/fraudsters. Most of them start as Angels to bring you closer and earn your confidence and strike very hard. Most ladies have lost their lives to these men. Be alert.

    ReplyDelete
  30. You need to sort out the depression issue, good thing you've registered somewhere. Work on it and you'll be fine.

    For the men, I have think cohabiting with your bf is a bad idea. To start with, such wouldn't let you make your own decisions like you ought to. You need to be by yourself to discover yourself and grow too. I suggest you live by yourself or with a lady. Focus on your study and let the guys be for now. Even if you must, use your head!

    ReplyDelete
  31. Awww, You appear to be so naive. I could pinch your cheek at this moment. Quite a blossoming flower, that needs to grasp the beams of the daylight so awful that it fails to remember that it's sweet nectar draws in bugs, termites and honey bees.

    Are you close to your mother? Do you share that motherly-daughterly bond? Do you have a big sister around you, whom could talk you about boys, relationships, life and career goals? Someone to me tor you. I was just wondering how you were able to rent an apartment with an opposite sex like for close to four years and no one was privy to it. Do you get visitations from your loved ones at school? Forgive my curiosity. Just so many question running through my mind. Coming from someone who got into her first relationship at the age of 24 believe me when I say, you aren't young to date at 18 but date responsibly, sweets.

    Yet, cohabitation though most engage in it, is not advisable. Personally, I think it cramps you and your growth as an individual. Your individuality is suppressed hence the reason you want to break free. You live a couple's lifestyle and you do not have the autonomy to experience life as a single college student with friends like it should be. Such an unnecessary responsiblity you emburdened yourself with at an age you should be living free, making lasting friendships, networking and letting your bloke be a small part of your school experience but not all of it, with enough self-restraint, of course. Now, this is the reason you want to break free and getting out there seems more enticing that any new experience irrespective of how ordinary it seems, strikes you as extra-ordinary. The novelty with your boyfriend has worn off and You can't wait to jump into the hands of the next bloke that feeds you the thrill you seek. Even if he is brandished with enough red flags and excess baggages of a future baby mama in view. You just do not care.

    You said, 'I've always wanted to leave our current location after school but baba dreams of settling there it scares me..' You think too much. If he wants to leave or stay fine! Stop seeing yourselves as a couple at this point and let each other breath. Give each other room to Find yourselves while still dating. Get a separate apartment with your girlfriends and let there be a chance for clarity between you both. I also think there is no point breaking up with him, he seems like a good guy to an extent. You want to explore, yea? I won't advise you tow that path, sweets. Quit trying to be a dare-devil and your fingers won't get burnt. Besides, it doesn't suit you.

    Oh! What a funny pseudonym. Vodka and Rum. Well, Rum hasn't seen you, your flaws, good and bad moods, strength and weakness and he is already talking marriage? I think that should be your wake-up call. Who jumps into a lifetime commitment like that? Besides You aren't single so what makes you think he also is? He is love-bombing you.


    ReplyDelete
  32. Old ladies can harbor such animosity towards young blood eh,the young lady asked for advice instead of some people to offer applicable advice,they are insulting her and saying she's too young.22? Too young!!!!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I'm just tired. The way oldies are so against younglings ehn
      I wonder how she'll feel reading these vile comments. Poor thing!

      Delete
    2. But she's young nau. Abi do you want us to pretend so she'll feel better?

      She's a student cohabiting with a male lover and playing full time housewife. Is that what she was sent to do in school?

      Delete
  33. Please leave that man and get an apartment. How can you live with a man at this age? Please move. You are too young. You need to finish school,serve before talking about man.

    ReplyDelete
  34. My little piece of advice is to tell you that that your online man is a scammer. Tell him to chat you on video call either on whatup or Facebook and listen to excuses, and also tell him you want to chat with his daughter and receive another excuse from him.

    Babe run for your life from this online man before you will come back here to ask for advice on how to move on after heartbeat.
    Shine your eyes.

    ReplyDelete
  35. Poster since you can't take decisions on your own then you are not ready to be in a relationship or start talking about marriage.

    You should pull out, get your mind to be mature in taking decisions. You should go for the things that are necessary and not for the physical

    ReplyDelete
  36. Very good write-up...I go with Stella and Sapphire's advice... good luck!

    ReplyDelete
  37. The fact that you cheated says something and right now you are still cheating, though emotionally. If you are still so young and already cheating what will you do in a long term relationship when boredom sets in? The truth is that at the core of your cheating I do not believe that you love or respect the man that you are living with. He deserves a woman who is 100% committed and devoted to him. Do not force yourself to stay with him because it is obvious that your heart is not in it, which is fine, you are only 22, you don't have to marry anyone at so young an age.

    As for the other guy I think you are infatuated by him and drawn to the obvious difference in personality, but I do not believe true love is there either, he is just stimulating your lust and desire to taste the forbidden fruit.

    My advice to you is to choose none of these men. You are not ready for anything remotely close to marriage. I don't even think that you are ready for a committed monogamous relationship. You should use your time to figure out who you are, build your career and work on those things about yourself that requires improvement. Get some therapy, perhaps your penchance for cheating stems from the depression. So work on self-healing and when you are healed and ready the man will show up.

    ReplyDelete
  38. I have been reading comments since, my question is What if Mr Rum is no longer a student, what if Mr Rum has made sure that academically she is doing well and have supported her in all angel and just waiting for her to finish school so he can marry her... from my research it is hard to find a guy that will be cohabiting with a girl for four years without any plans of marrying her, if a guy can stay with one girl for four years knowing fully well that their are so many girls out there but still sticks to this very one he is cohabiting with, i think Mr. Rum deserves some accolade, he shouldn't cohabit with a girl that is not his wife for that long, las las body no be firewood Mr Rum is not a saint, na still blood dey flow for him body, even though he is prayerful, Some Pastors do worst you know? my advice is that the girl should go and stay alone for now and work on her self and pray to God for direction .... and i am sure she will get it and as for Mr. Voldka hmmmm i can only say that guys dey ooo.

    ReplyDelete

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