Stella Dimoko Korkus.com: Chronicles Of A Married Man - 8

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Sunday, January 17, 2021

Chronicles Of A Married Man - 8

If your wife wakes you up early morning to talk,wahala dey!!!









So, my wife woke me up at 5am in the morning. With my sleepy eyes and feeling very irritated i asked what the issue was or what i had done again. The married men know the implications of such early morning wake-ups…wahala dey. Then I heard 

Wife: Honey what’s the issue. You have not been touching me!

Me: (with a bemused look) What do you mean?

Wife: Our s#x life has been terrible the last couple of months, you barely initiate s#x. If I don’t, you will just sleep off. Most times you wake up just to press your phone as if I’m not in this bed with you.

Me: Mama, it’s stress from work and family, writing reports and you know everything na!

Wife: No, I don’t know anything. You have changed. Or tell me, is there another woman? Because if you are not getting it from me, then you are probably getting it from someone else. Are you cheating on me?

Me: No na! I’m not. (Men’s answer will always be “no” until they are caught)

We continued the conversation for a while. Of course, the conversation will end with a round of consoling “good-morning” s#x. And a promise to do better.

For those of us married, you are probably familiar with this conversation. We have had these conversations several times over the course of our marriage and I always tell me wife “never settle for a marriage with less s#x” if you think I am not giving you enough, always speak out. Me, I also have my “complain moments”

So, let’s talk about s#x…I will probably do two or more episodes about s#x in marriages.

Remember I told you we were sexually active before we got married. 

Concerning sex before marriage. To do or not to do. I’m sure you want to hear my opinion about it. My answer has always been a simple one. Do what you think is right for you. But for me, I didn’t have any qualms about it. Sex before marriage has always been a controversial topic but beyond the religious angle to it let me make just a point on it. 

I have always seen sex as a form and continuation of communication in relationship. You can tell a couple have a good sex life from the way they communicate, even a bad sex life can be improved with good communication. I always say, you have not completely known your woman until you sleep with her. You may not attain certain level of understanding and bonding until you have had sex. 

Also, naked bodies tell tales. For example, an experienced man can know if a woman has given birth or if she had done some medical procedures before by mere looking at her naked body. I believe seeing your supposed future partner’s naked body could give you more information about their history. 

Getting married to a person who you are not physically and sexually attracted to is a recipe for disaster.


I don’t believe in this taste before you buy mentality but I sometimes encourage sex before marriage if you won’t feel guilty about it due to your religious or cultural orientation,If your religion does not allow it. Don’t do it. Because it doesn’t make sense having to feel guilty about something you are supposed to enjoy.

It is better than getting married only to find out you didn’t get the “right package”. Sexual compatibility plays a crucial role in marriage. Though people can learn more about it after marriage but sometimes it’s better to know that you are getting married to a frigid woman or that your man has a one inch “chairman” way ahead of time to avoid “Dear Stella chronicles” or getting disappointed later. 


A broken engagement is better than a broken marriage.

I have always been amazed by the level of ignorance some married couple display when it comes to the issue of sex. Some even assume that having a good sex life comes naturally or that the “spirit of God” will reveal it to them when they eventually marry. Baba that na lie from the devil himself.


A good sex life in marriage, like every other thing, is learnt. I was shocked when I heard a lady say she doesn’t even know where clitoris is in her body and she is a graduate of the “federal republic”!


 There are more books and movies about sex than books on how to cook. But looking at marriages with issues these days and with the issues of cheating partners, you will discover that poor quality or lack of sex thereof is the leading cause of such issues.

Also, I have met lots of women who say they dont know what orgasm is talk less of having one, many people don’t even know that 50 percent of women cannot have orgasm via penal penetration so they continue to put the poor innocent man under pressure to perform miracles.

Can you imagine the horror in my wife’s (then girlfriend) face the first time I told her I wanted to “lick her plate”?

Anyways this s#x matter will continue when I return…


Ciao!



*Baba so you dey lick plate?LMAO!!!...Not all men like it oh,some complain of some kind of smell down dia...

74 comments:

  1. This is truly an interesting read, you write beautifully well.

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  2. Wehdone sir. You are doing well.

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  3. I enjoyed this writeup. Oga married man, you're right about some women not knowing what orgasm is, and most orgasm is not via penal penetration. Some people even see it as a taboo. πŸ™„πŸ™„. Sex, lovemaking sessions are meant to be ENJOYED, biko not endured. And about licking plate, don't even get me started. That's like the IT thing for me😁😁😁. We have some selfish guys out there that wanna enjoy bjs, but ain't ready to go down. 🀨🀨.

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    1. Lol..
      Sometimes it's the poor hygiene from the lady but the guy won't want to say it so he doesn't hurt her feelings.. na to begin come up with many excuses..

      See ehn, if the babe is fresh and clean, na purple kisses things oh, she won't need to ask sef.. it would come naturally, and I have many guys that agree with me on this.

      "The dream-purple kisses" off the "Love/Hate" Album (2007) - listen to the track if you don't understand what purple kisses is☻

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    2. Naaa Dante, I disagree. Some say it's not normal for a man to go down on a lady. Some say it's against what they believe. But giving them a BJ is not against their beliefs ba! They should carry such mentality far from. Sex is meant to be enjoyed by both parties, not one enjoying more than the other.

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    3. Lol..
      Okay.. Let them go and meet all those boring girls that just lie like a log of wood and can't meet the guy half way. Some would even want the guy to do some struggling first before they'll pretend to be over powered and won't even let the guy enjoy it or them sef, I don't know if they enjoy such nonsense..

      'Heard' that struggling before sex is common with yoruba and akwa ibom girls☻.. next thing they'll come and say they haff carry belle Ontop sex that the guy no even enjoy.. and i also 'heard' it's difficult to wear condom or do withdrawal method in such sex.. and it most times cause premature ejaculated cos the guy just wants to cum and go- so he can rest..

      However, I advise guys to avoid such girls cos they are trouble, they will most time claim you forced yourself on them, and you know what that means

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    4. Trust me, a lot of men are eager to lick plate. They don't because "some women" have terrible smell down there and they just dont want to hurt their feelings.

      I use to have a GF a while back that only wipe her bum with toilet roll. Problem is Toilet roll never cleans the bum well.

      I know. Some people will argue with me; but trust me. it NEVER does!

      And imagine fucking doggy style and you can smell the musky smell of poo from the bum bum. How are you suppose to want to "la plate" in that kind of situation?

      Well....told her about it - babe didn't talk to me for two weeks...lol. But me I no look uche face sha! But eventually, she changed and started using water to wash off.

      What about vagnitis or Candidiasis that causes fishy smell in women's vagina? Melo la fe ka...melo la fe so?

      So yes, most times, when a man refuse, it's because they are afraid to hurt your feelings. But of course, there are some exceptions to the rule.

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    5. Mr Dante

      You seem to have taken your geography and karma Sutra lessons very seriously.

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    6. Mbok Dante, I am proudly Akwa Ibom, and I have never ever heard such rubbish talk before😑😑😑. You make it sound like most girls don't enjoy or initiate sex, talking about guys like some kind local champion. You have never heard of guys that want you to go out, and satisfy them, while they lay there doing nothing. Sex is not about thrusting in and outπŸ™„, you have got to explore your partners body..

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    7. Candy shebi you see Dante coming for us here.

      Dante,you heard you heard.
      Your ear is really active ☺️☺️

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    8. Ehn?! @candy.. Calm down oh
      How many girls return the favor sucking boobs, kissing and nipping the guy all over the same way the guy takes his time to do to them, abi do you think guys don't enjoy it too..

      And as regards the 'struggling before sex' thingy, "my friends" still stand by it. An average akwa ibom and yoruba girls do that, maybe you didn't grow in the state or you're part of the exceptions.. I don't know if they think doing that nonsense makes it look like they're not cheap, when they are only cheating themselves πŸ˜’

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    9. Marvel, leave am, make he dey hear upandan.
      Dante, now I'm beginning to think this happened to you, not once or twice. Check yasef ok.

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    10. As you guys keep licking nonsense remember oral cancers are real and yes the vagina has natural smell so anyone who has a sweet smelling vee puts something they shouldn't be there

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    11. Dante, I really do hope you are ok?

      Everything with you is battle of the sexes. Stay away from women if you hate them this much. See how you have turned this interesting topic to something else, na wah.

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  4. Oga married man, not all men cheat please. If you don’t have constant sex with your partner doesn’t mean you’re getting it somewhere else. Women should realize a man can’t keep on having sex seven days a week, taking days off when she is having her period. The penile bone most times need to rest because if it didn’t, it will lead to erectile dysfunction and you don’t want that. Couples should find a common ground on how many times in a month they want to copulate so each partner can optimize their sex drive.

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    Replies
    1. Hollup! There are ppl that have sex seven days a week? Wow!

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    2. Penis don’t have bone

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  5. Hmmmmmmmmmm, all I know is, no matter how people try to justify pre-marital sex, it won't and will never make it right.

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    1. It wont make it right, to you that know the ordinances of your God, but not all believe so to them it aint wrong either...

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    2. Thank you!
      This same blog we read about a lady whose husband was a tiger in bed before marriage. He could go on non-stop for hours and that was during the dating phase only for them to sign the dotted lines and he couldn't last two minutes. It turned out he used sexual enhancers to dazzle her back then in the bedroom and she only discovered the truth after marriage. Even if you engage in pre-marital sex to be sure you aren't getting short-changed it is still not an assurance.
      I find it hilarious how people who engage in premarital-sex hide under the coverage of not having any desire to be confronted with unpleasant surprises in the future so they go ahead and have sex to be careful. Just admit you just want to have sex and stop pretending you have sex due to dread of the unknown.

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    3. Exactly,God bless you!

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    4. Yes! What my Bible tells me is wrong is wrong. No matter how the world justifies it. I never has premarital sex with my hubby and our sex life is Amazing.

      Like you said, communication is key!

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    5. Thank you. People don't realize that 'mere disobedience' can lead to severe consequences. Premarital sex is the root of the adultery and sexual perversion of our generation. Both fornication and adultery stems from the same mindset..sex with someone who is not your spouse. If you see nothing wrong with it before marriage, you will see nothing wrong with it after marriage. Of course I know it's tempting.. the serpent made Eve see the apple as good for food, pleasant to the eyes and desirable. It made logical sense to eat of the tree, what could be wrong with that? But we all know how that story ended.

      Please young ones, let us flee sexual immorality. You are not alone, God provides the grace. Sins of the flesh causes the greatest wounds on the soul and it hurts the Lord deeply. He does not want to lose any of us. Not one soul lost.

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    6. Sabella, NIB, anonymous 15:10 and 15:31.. God bless you all real good. 😍😍😍😍

      Anonymous 14:54, whether they believe or not, it's still not right. Their belief doesn't change anything. God bless you.

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    7. Ah I came late. You've all hit the nail on the head. No matter how you try to paint it, premarital sex can never be right

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    8. God bless you all...don't mind this perverse generations..The only thing they came to the world to do is to have sex like rabbits. Truth is bitter . We must stand by it. God's General.

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  6. Orgasm for me is thru sucking of nipples. If you suck am well... multiple orgasm for me. I can't come thru penetration. My Clitoris is tiny

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    1. Lol..
      See the both of them 'awwing' and 'wowing' there.. that's where they'll see them.. ashawo ☻☻ Lol

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    2. Dante if you're not a phool laidis 🀣🀣 I'm so sure you dropped this comment after ejaculating to our comments. Yeye boy

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    3. 🀣🀣🀣🀣🀣Dante
      Wetin shantelle do you?
      Rather why una dey always attack each other in afunny wayπŸ˜‚?

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    4. ShoShanTe 2021🀣🀣🀣🀣

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    5. Should I talk?
      Please ladies stop killing someone's child by demanding he continues to strain his penile muscles to make you orgasm because you do not understand your body.
      I don't know if Stella will post sha but let your Spouse suck one nipple,fondle one and use his finger to make circling motions on your clitoris (talk about multitasking),or you use the tip of his D to rub on it. Few minutes into that,you will get your release and then Huncle can go ahead and do his 5secs thrust and get his rest.
      Let strength be reserved for real office work.


      By the way,I read it online πŸ™†πŸ™„πŸ‘‹

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    6. Miss aboki you better stop πŸ›‘πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚

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    7. Miss aboki more like *
      ShoCea and SDantelle 2021#
      These four are just cray cray! Love them.

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  7. Interesting column
    I wonder why most igbo men don't like to' lick plate'. They few ones I met said too degrading for them.

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    1. Lol. That's how one of my ex said licking plate is a lesbian affair. That am I sure of my sexuality... Na so I pick race oooo. Some Igbo men can be so bush...

      Lovelace

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    2. I love getting head from my man like kilode that shit is bae

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    3. I know someone that said he has never done that. That how can he put his mouth where a woman menstruate almost every month..he's muslim,don't know if he's has to do with religion.

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  8. "But looking at marriages with issues these days and with the issues of cheating partners, you will discover that poor quality or lack of sex thereof is the leading cause of such issues".

    I disagree with you on this,a good number of men get good pounding from their wives and via verse,yet still cheat. A man without self control will still cheat even if he is married to a professional porn star.

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  9. I agree that sex is a form of communication. It is supposed to be.

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  10. I completely disagree with you on some of the points raised, for example being able to tell if a couple is having good/bad sex from their communication, and so on, or that you can always tell if there have been some medical procedures by mere looking at a woman's naked body, ahh you never see.
    You are a good story teller though.

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  11. For me to have an organism my plate must me licked very well. Hubby doesn't do it all the time but he is trying.

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    Replies
    1. I get Orgasm through sucking
      Or rubbing my clitoris on my man dick.

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    2. Anon 17:38, you know wassup!

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  12. You are a great writer.... and you did hit some salient points. The sexual compatibility is really very important but I must also stress that monogamy is a scam of sort. The quest to thirst for a different sexual experience is innate in man. We are in constant denial of this though

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    1. ‘ The quest to thirst for a different sexual experience is innate in man’...And woman?

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  13. I told a friend long ago that not every woman experience orgasm through penetrative sex and she was arguing.

    Me most times I don't experience orgasm until plate is shined and bwess is sucked biko.🚢🚢🚢🚢

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  14. I love ladies that squirt. That's the main koko.. I always feel fulfilled like job well done. I can't lick plate, the last time I tried it, the smell nearly killed me.

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    1. Hmmmmmm
      First day I made a lady squirt I felt fulfilled
      The fountain was massive and mama was shaking like jellyfish.

      Lord forgive me for she was someone's fiancΓ©e.

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  15. Nice gist, we married have tired

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  16. For those who “lick plates”, it’s a habit that is recent, and copied from the western world’s “movies”. I’m not judging but remember that in addition to high pressure running water with flexible shower head to clean that area, many women here don’t just clean with tissue paper. There are wet wipes specifically made for female hygiene and clean restrooms on highways in rest areas and even at that.... I have seen folks with severe discoloration, even eczema and fungal infection of their chin, upper and lower lips and the area below the nostrils. In many cases it didn’t go away with several meds and they have to use make up to conceal it. It’s from habits like this. Kind of like “depend” adult diaper and complete breakdown of the sphincter or elastic in some areas that made a patient smell all the time even after bathing multiple times per day and using the best perfumes. Be careful what you take away from SM. No abuses please. Keep it polite

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  17. Orgasm for me is when you are sucking and kneading bwess and also pounding at the same time.

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  18. From the comments so far,I guess I'm the only exception who doesn't like this plate licking abi eating of a thing.
    I just feel it's somehow allowing a man take his head down below no matter how neat.
    My opinion

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    Replies
    1. I hate it with passion and my husband has accepted that it can never be part of our love life.

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    2. Thank you, I can't do it,no matter how you sweet talk it

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  19. I wish my wife can read this piece. Our sex life is non existent. It’s by His grace that I haven’t cheated.

    Me sef don tire.

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  20. I am cheating because of poor sex

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  21. Head...hmmmm. My specialty. Oh boy! I can't date you if I can't give you head. With my natural open teeth na so I go just position clitoris between. It helps if the woman is clean and odorless down there as well.
    I enjoy giving good head. Too bad my wife doesn't take personal hygiene serious. I have talked and talked to no avail. Her loss though.

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    1. Please what do you mean by personal hygiene. She doesn't shave or have her bath twice a day or what. Please what and what do you want her to do.in other to take her personal hygiene seriously.

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  22. Getting head is bae. The feeling is out of this world...but not every guy knows how to give good head.. Some will just be causing pain down there.mstcheeeeew

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  23. Getting head is bae. The feeling is out of this world...but not every guy knows how to give good head.. Some will just be causing pain down there.mstcheeeeew

    ReplyDelete

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