Stella Dimoko Korkus.com: CHRONICLES OF A MARRIED MAN – 52

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Sunday, November 21, 2021

CHRONICLES OF A MARRIED MAN – 52

She asked him if he was married and he replied her in a sarcastic way and asked her if she wanted to marry him.....

I was sitting in my corner sipping my iced cold beer while this conversation was going on. 






I knew this was another journey to premium tears loading. But I can’t help her. She would learn. Life has a way of teaching us such hard lessons.

This was a conversation between my married colleague and a lady he was wooing at that time. But in my mind, I was thinking; shouldn’t this woman know that he is a married man without being told? 

This gives rise to the age long question. How do you identify a married man?

Lots of young unsuspecting ladies have fallen into the trap of dating married men without even knowing. In as much as I would say some of them are not smart, others were clearly played.

Like all of my writes-up, this is purely based on my personnel experience and are as such colored by my own sentiments and how I see things but some of these things are clearly basic knowledge. There are no hard and fast rules to these things, so there will always be exceptional cases and this may not apply to lots of people.

Let’s get to it...

To begin with, the hunch or that “feeling”. Whenever you have an intuitive feeling that the man you are dating is married, he is married. The aura of being married is akin to the smell of the African male goat, you can’t miss it. There is this air about the married man that he can’t easily shake off.


They always seem to know lots of stuffs. Watch out when he talks about family, bearing children, managing the home. Watch him when he talks about fees, pregnancy and other family related issues. He will always give you tell-tale signs that he has had the experience before.


Such men are more in control of their emotions and may seemingly become more caring and understanding than the average single guy.

You can’t miss the signs...they will always be there.

Secondly, the age. This is a no-brainer. The natural expectation is that men within their late-thirties and forties are expected to be married. Though there are a handful of exceptions to this but it will be safer to assume that a man of such age is a married man. 


There are also cases of younger men even in their early twenties who are married but the number is fewer compared to the older men.

When you see men at such age who are financially well off, and everything seems to be in place but say they are not married, that should sound off an alarm bell to any lady. A man that is supposed to be married and is not should either mean that he has an issue getting married before now or is already married.


Thirdly, they always “appear and disappear”. A man that has a family will always find time to be with his family at some point even if he is dating you. Even in cases where their family live in other cities or countries, they will create time to always visit them.

So, there will always be a pattern of intermittent absence away from you. This could be in the guise of a business trip, work, having an issue he has to take care of at certain times. The point is, there will always be times when he will always be away from you in order to be with his family.

This is particularly common with men within my profession. Because of the rotational kind of work they do, they can claim to be at work while joggling between their families and the other woman.

Once you find that there is a pattern of absence about him, just know he’s already married.


Furthermore, there’s no spontaneity about them. Everything is always planned and organized. There is always a pattern about dating them. The time he calls, when you can see him, when he responds to your messages, etc. Everything about him will always be purposeful. There is no unplanned outings or weekend getaways.

He might attribute it to the nature of his work, his schedules, about how he doesn’t receive calls when he is in his office, how he has to work on weekends, how he doesn’t like to be disturbed when it’s late or a habit of always calling you at night.

Having relationships with such men means visitation and meeting times are planned, you can’t see him on your own terms.


Also, they are patient and drama-free. A married man is more likely to agree to whatever uncomfortable conditions you will give to him. They are more likely to say “yes” to your silly demands. Always quick to accept and endure your youthful excesses. They would rather not want to quarrel and want to maximize the few times they want to spend with you.


They tend to apologize to you with gifts, accepting they were wrong even if they weren’t and will always have a way of using their money or means to influence the relationship. The difference between a married man and a so-called “yahoo boy” relationship is the lack of drama. The married man does not have time for it. Except he is jobless.

Lastly, married men date purposefully. It’s either they are coming for the s#x, your money, the fun or distraction they get from you, or they want you for a second wife if they can afford to. 

They are more comfortable keeping a “conditional” relationship.

Married men are more comfortable with ”friends with benefit” arrangements, “no s#x” relationships; dating you and giving you freedom to do whatever you want.

When you are dating a man who doesn’t remotely feel jealous about your other relationships and the other man in your life, he is probably married. A single hot-blooded young man will be bothered about who you talk to. But for the married man; he cares less as long as he is getting what he needs from the relationship.

In cases where such married men care so much and want to keep a relationship for a long term, then they want to jealously and exclusively own you; as if you are a pet or a trophy.

This is in contrast with many single men who probably wants to either be in the relationship for the fun of it or wants to marry on the long run. The fall out of this is that these married men are more invested in the relationship than their single counterparts.

I have seen lots of single ladies who have become so attached to such married men to the point that they can’t stand the single guys any longer. They see them as not mature enough and not emotionally invested in having serious relationships.

I might be wrong on my assumptions but you never know...


Ciao!





Hmmmmm.........

43 comments:

  1. Replies
    1. WE BUY DEAD INVERTER BATTERY.0814139511321 November 2021 at 14:03

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      Delete
    2. No wonder all dem chick's wey I dey run things with (fwb), dey always fight and accuse me say I be married man cos all those wey you talk, na so I dey roll.....single, never been married, no kids and in my 30s...omo dem no dey gree o. Imagine, dem go dey house,stay on fone for hours, dey talk to guy....nothing concern me. My own, just fuck and suck me when konji hold me. One even swear, say she do FBI work, discover say my family dey Yankee meanwhile I dey here living double life. Too funny.

      Delete
    3. Users always get their reward

      Delete
    4. These clues are usually true, but the guy I fear pass for my life na thin tall tony of BBA.. nothing gave that guy away. It's crazy. So some men can be sleek like that especially if the wife doesn't live in the country

      Delete
    5. The aura of being married is akin to the smell of the African male goat, you can’t miss it.

      Delete
  2. The absolute truth

    ReplyDelete
  3. I have seen lots of single ladies who have become so attached to such married men to the point that they can’t stand the single guys any longer. They see them as not mature enough and not emotionally invested in having serious relationships

    This right here,there is no truer truth than this.
    Na wa

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. The manipulation that gets the lady emotionally dependent is from hell

      Delete
  4. I believe you. From the stories I've read, most of these ladies do mention all you said up there. These married men should respect their marriages na. Is it difficult?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. They have no value for themselves and the vows they took

      No respect for their spouses

      Delete
  5. This is my favourite segment.
    It helps one to see things from a male perspective. Absolutely priceless!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Same here.
      I enjoy reading from him.

      Delete
  6. 99% of the time, d ladies know d signs but geign ignorance with the hope that he will forego his family or add them to the harem. Your bf always takes u to hotels n never to his house. For couples who live apart, he takes them to his house but d lies in the ship is always glaring. I still remember dat Chronicle where side chic is fighting another sidechic over a married man, despicable and older babes do this a lot.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Desperation and vulnerability truly blocks their senses

      Delete
  7. Why do you and all your married colleagues/friends you write about string single ladies along and lead them
    into adulteries? And if we go by Proverbs 31, isn't it alcohol that bring about the seeing of "strange women"
    the lustful eyes and so on? What efforts have you made to admonish your friends and yourself to desist from this
    adulterous paths?
    And I will still ask the question I asked last week in good faith, are you still "in the world," because I need to
    situate my following of your stories in the the right perspective.
    Thanks.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Holier than thou!!!
      You can stop opening this segment' it's not by force to read it.

      Delete
  8. Hope you won't mind life to teach your daughters too after they have followed married men into sexual immorality?

    ReplyDelete
  9. Dear ladies, just a gentle reminder to whoever is dating a married albeit intentionally or not. Do not spend the best years of your life with him. Be very wise.

    ReplyDelete
  10. By the time the lady finds all these signs, he don chop am many times and move to the next victims. Find time to visit who dey date for house even if it is just for 2 minutes. That's all

    ReplyDelete
  11. I have thought about it. How many of her single male friends can afford the amount I give her in a month? She is the one that doesn’t want to let go not me. She has competitors

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. She was the one that asked you out too, right? At least you know you are just a means to an end .

      Delete
  12. Damn. As husband scarce reach? If any woman loose guard, kukuma collect her husband

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. And you'll sleep well at night knowing it's cause of you another woman is crying herself to sleep and depriving the children of their father?
      Women supporting women indeed

      Delete
  13. By the time the lady finds all these signs, he don chop am many times and move to the next victims. Find time to visit who dey date for house even if it is just for 2 minutes. That's all

    ReplyDelete
  14. Visit his house even if it is just for 2 minutes. All the answers dey there. If he won’t let you, don’t date him. Simple as that

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Visit him?
      You'd be surprised that that will even entrap the girl the more, because some men don't mind if this is the conviction you need from them. Visiting some guys at home, will not give you any signs o.

      In today's world, na God abeg. One of my female cousin's friend visited her bf every fortnight (weekend) for 2yrs and never saw any sign that he was married.

      Delete
    2. While I agree with most of the things you wrote, from the experiences of some people I know, it isn't always through. Separated or divorced guys/men can know this things too. Same for guys who have had a child with a lady they are not married to, due to circumstances. But in all, those are the telltale signs that a guy is married, in a large percentage of the times.

      Then there are those who don't just want anything to trouble their space.

      Delete
    3. So so true wow!!!! You just described my married man friend. He is 36 I am 32.
      I've done everything possible to scare this guy away but "for where".
      He spoils me with gifts. All the properties in my house he bought them.
      He placed me on weekly salary of 20k excluding my toiletries and money for my hair & drugs when I'm ill
      I'm only keeping him cos I've not found a job yet.
      He even extends his generosity to my family.
      He gave me 150k to shop for Xmas.

      Delete
    4. 17.02 you are selling your destiny and future for peanuts, o mase o. Greedy girls

      Delete
    5. You sell your dignity for 20k! 20k! Are you serious?

      Delete
  15. Some of the ladies know he is married and go ahead to date him. I know one working in a bank that gave her virginity to a married man. 10 years later he is still the only man she has ever slept with and now has a child for him. Meanwhile he is hiding it from his wife and telling his friends the girl stupidly got pregnant for him. He is still stringing her along with lies. Now he hardly sees her as he is with his family and new girlfriends. Both the man and girl irritate me. I just feel so sorry for the innocent wife.

    ReplyDelete
  16. Wicked men dating innocent good girls

    ReplyDelete
  17. May God give our young women their own husbands so that men won't be screwing their heads. Amen.

    ReplyDelete

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