Stella Dimoko Korkus.com: Chronicle Of Blog Visitor Narrative...

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Thursday, May 05, 2022

Chronicle Of Blog Visitor Narrative...

 Hmmmm....





STAND ALONE NARRATIVE
TIPS TO CALLING OFF A WEDDING AND WAYS
 TO HANDLE A BABY DADDY



Please guys what are the procedures to follow if your want your baby daddy to carter for your baby without getting married to him?. I am asking for a sister who got pregnant before the bride price was to be paid.

 They are engaged and have been dating for a while and by now the man is supposed to have paid but when she discovered that she is pregnant and they started planning everything sharp sharp only for her to start discovering some of his attitude that she cannot tolerate anymore. 


She told him to hold on a little with the marriage thing...

When she told me she was like 2 to 3 months gone already but I told her not to terminate it no matter what because she is already 39 years old and this could be her miracle. She is keeping the baby but she is no longer interested in the marriage with her guy but want to take him to an authority who can make him take care of his baby.


 She only wants the process that will make the guy to be taking responsibility of his child, pay for the accommodation she will be staying till she gives birth and after birth cos the attitude she told me about the guy I have also said no way to marry such man who will abuse her in the future.

 Please she needs advice ASAP please forget the insult and no need asking why she did like that when she has already done the mistake. We cannot reverse what has already happened but look for solutions right now.





I quite understand that she is avoiding getting married and regretting it but has the guy said he will not take care of the child? wont it be a shock for him to be invited over to discuss about taking care of his baby when he is looking forward to a marriage?

So the pregnant lady cannot pay for her rent and was solely dependent on this man for finances? Hmmmm na wah.

What if he says he wants a DNA test before he will spend a dime?... I will advice that she says nothing to him about not wanting to marry until she has birthed the child. she can also change behaviour and become problematic so that he will call off the wedding and say he will provide for the baby....

She should become a pain in the axx.... He will call it off himself..LOL

76 comments:

  1. Hmmmmm this is a tough one

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. She's been sold the babymama idea as easy, glamorous and chic. You that advised her to keep the baby and cancel the marriage should be able to help her if he refuses to become her cash cow. What are sisters for?

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    2. Hmmm..see comments o. I know marriage isn’t by force but the double standards on this blog is nauseating. I wonder if this what you people would say if the said guy was your brother who had spent a lot already on a lady and wedding plans only for the lady after all the while they’ve dated and she agreed to marry the said guy to suddenly wake up one morning to discover(suddenly) she can’t tolerate his ‘attitudes’ of which non could even be stated here. But then of course because you are a lady I trust you would get the support and validation you need here to go ahead in breaking someone’s heart. After all it’s men who are scum and heartless right?

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    3. 15:47 cos the attitude she told me about the guy I have also said no way to marry such man who will abuse her in the future

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    4. No one even cares to know what the said fiancé did ( or these attitudes she just suddenly discovered now) to warrant such sudden heart break and disappointment. But of course since it’s a woman who wrote in we can automatically support her without questioning and encourage her to do thesame thing most of you insult and lay courses on men for. Darken Rhal

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    5. So y'all will prefer her marrying this man and come back sharing Chronicles of domestic violence? @anon and Ms Sapphire? You think a 39 year old woman will walk away from a marriage if the situation doesn't scream for it?

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    6. Eka you have already concluded it would be “domestic violence” because that is the trending word now. Even the op didn’t state that, she just said “abuse her in future” but to suit in ur narrative, you have manufactured the “domestic”.

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    7. Oh wow, excuses are now flying in.. I see this same 39yr old woman is a bag of knowledge and that’s why she got pregnant for a man she didn’t really know well enough to want to marry in the first place right? Smh

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    8. Lol.. ok then we should not blame any man who dumps a gf or pregnant fiancée any more so long as he tells us he feels like she portrays the attitude of a woman who would cheat on him in the future. Double standards overloaded! 😂

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    9. Eka, a 39 yo doesn't know to hold off pregnancy till after marriage? Not everyman enjoys this babydaddy trend. Many are still decent enough to want all their children by one woman. So if she knows she is better off a single mother than marry him, then she should step up and be ready to shoulder it and pray he is moved to take responsibility. She is 39yo not a teenager for crying out loud!

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    10. Being a baby mama is not moi-moi o. What if the guy doesn't have much money to rent good house for her? Tell her to be financially independent o.

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    11. Most men show their true character after sex with a woman, when a woman has become pregnant, if she's dependent and broke, if she doesn't give birth to a baby boy and if her body changes after childbirth. I don't blame her at all for backing out because it happened to someone I know. Let her forget the man and take care of her baby because it'll be a really tedious and difficult process to get him to take responsibility. Truth is that most men are evil so women must be very vigilant before marriage and childbearing which is a life changing decision.

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    12. At her age, she should be matured enough to look after herself and a baby. You can't say she is not doing anything. I'm saying this because with the way she is going about it, the guy may just decide to hold back any form of support. All these not knowing a person's character and you have been dating and gbenshing dey tire me sha.

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    13. It’s unbelievable that at 39 she has nothing doing.
      Well, I don’t think there’s anything she can do other than tell him the truth. If she is scared that he may harm her, she can get elderly people involved.
      I don’t think he will want to pay for accommodation after all it’s her decision to move on.

      My advice is that she sends him a letter explaining or asking for his help cus he really doesn’t owe her much. If he doesn’t oblige she should kindly move in with her family.


      # push up (original)

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  2. This is funny.. You don't need the whole world to tell you what to do...

    Tell your man you no longer want to continue with the marriage and that all you want is for him to be responsible for the child, the man doesn't have to pay your rent.. If he accepts, good and if he doesn't?, madam, kindly take responsibility for your child and move on with your life. Like your friend said, aborting the child at this age is not acceptable, the child might be your consolation if marriage doesn't come in the future or anytime soon.

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    Replies
    1. Ha!! The kind of heart some people have here. Even Stella is advising her to be a pain in the a** of a man who we don’t even know what his crimes are. Poster All of a sudden it’s now you know you can’t deal with him and his excesses after all these while of dating, F*cling and even agreeing to marry him? I wonder if it was a guy who wrote in that he is planning on dumping a lady who’s pregnant for him, who he has promised marriage and even engaged.. dumping her while wedding preparations are ongoing and well anticipated. Would we have advised him to be so toxic and a pain in the a*s so as to strategically dump the lady??? Make una dey fear God o. If na man write in now say him wan dump him pregnant woman I know the kind cyber earthquake wey for happen for this comment section today.

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    2. Exactly my thought. Do women no grow in Nigeria? Everytime you people get pregnant next thing is how the man should look after the child and mother. You all know how to fight for your rights and fight over men but you don't know how to fight at being independent. Mtchewwwwwwwwww

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    3. @18:36, the fight over men is because of the "look after" the men provide. So you think is fight for loveor for the benefit of the men?

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    4. Anon 18:36 so a woman should solely fend for child that she made with a man abi?? Yet 20yrs later, the man will want to claim father?
      Abeg let them be jointly responsible for the sex they enjoyed

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  3. Same thing happened to me, baby daddy thought I would drag him to pay for upkeep, but no. I just rented a 2BR-Flat, and moved in. At 39 she should be able to care for her kid herself, if she cannot, then she has no Business getting pregnant and start fighting over upkeep . Till today my baby daddy does not know how we are, but I'm unconcerned. If my son wants to meet his dad when he is grown, it's fine by me, I don't have time to use my son as leverage. Life was meant to be enjoyed. No stress .

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Poster come and read the comment you are looking for, especially if you live in Nigeria.
      At 39 you should be able to pay your rent and care for a child you open leg to collect with your full chest.
      Since the man is abusive, tell him you can’t go on with the marriage but ready to co parent with him responsively.
      He may or may not agree to take up such responsibilities.
      And if he doesn’t, Have your child and move on with your life.

      Delete
    2. Yvonne, the man isn’t abusive oh ‘yet’. Her response to the anon above tells that they suspect he might be abusive in the future hence the plan to dump him and convert him into a cow with nice mammary glands good enough for milking. I mean all the while you were ‘dating’ and banging this same prospective abusive man you never knew he’s not the kinda man you’d like to marry until you agreed to marry him which I’m sure is why he was ok with you getting pregnant ( and we know most single ladies that age look for a man maybe with the kinda physical attributes they like to just deliberately get them pregnant and have a baby as they are menopause sensitive ). I mean, imagine a guy dumping a pregnant lady prior to her wedding day because he suddenly claims he’s started seeing alleged traits that shows that the lady ‘might’ cheat on him in the future.. gaddamn it meeen! Whaaaat?? Just like the anon up there said ‘marriage isn’t by force’ but come oooon this is becoming too much on this blog. We need to stop using people and hide our wickedness and irresponsibility under the umbrella of ‘it was a mistake so don’t judge me’. the said guy could be my/your brother and is obviously someone’s son with feelings. Big Booty Mechanic.

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    3. I'm honestly trying to understand why a 39 year old woman would want him to pay for her rent. Sounds to me like she's just a gold digger who wants to have a man take care of her and her child's finances without getting married to him.

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    4. 15:08, your ehug is waiting for you here. I'm 40 and 2 months. All I'm looking for is a single man ready to lay in the sack with me for procreation. If he wants to stick around if we are blessed, I wouldn't mind giving him my world. Who has time to chase baby Daddy for sma milk. At a point in life, you need to make proper decision as a full grown woman. Una no dey shame?

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    5. Anon 18:05 say no muuur.. she wants the Responsibility of a baby, Entitlements of a married woman and the Lifestyle of a Babymama. Selfish much. Big Booty Mechanic

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    6. Anon 18:43 why a single man? Since you don’t, according to you, really mind if he walks away after then you might as well include married men in your orbit. I know someone who just wanted a child. She had the means to take care of the child, so she deliberately targeted a married man who held a high position in his church and is well respected socially - in order words someone who had something to loose! As soon as she confirmed she was pregnant, like Stella said, she started putting up an attitude. The poor man did not know what he did wrong but pleaded and all. The woman’s behavior only got worse. The man reluctantly had to let go. I few months later he saw the woman at an event, already showing. The man did some mental calculations (Lol) and came to the correct conclusion. He approached the lady to ask if he was responsible for what he was seeing. The woman warned him seriously to stop pestering her otherwise she would tell his wife. Oga, happily married man that he was, had to walk away to avoid scandal. So our woman ended up with what she always wanted - a child of her own with no string attached!

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  4. Is your sister a full time housewife or what. Let her discuss with the guy and call off the wedding. As far as the guy is in the know that the pregnancy is his, he will do what is necessary if he has a God fearing heart.

    Your sister should go and work to rent her apartment ABI she dey abroad?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. They never ready to talk true, the man is probably married.

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  5. Badass Stella mama!
    You see all the concerns Stella listed eh, think about it & let her not be the one calling off things, atleast not yet

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    Replies
    1. The truth is that it's the other way round. The man decided to become a pain in the ass so that she can end things with him. How many men sincerely want to marry? Many of them want you to lose your confidence and become desperate for marriage, breathing down their neck before they marry you. They actually need this so that they can stomp on you in marriage and put you where they want you which is a docile woman that doesn't have a say.

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  6. I will advice her not to say anything to him now. Give birth to her baby and just face front if he likes let him take care of the child or not

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  7. The fact that the relationship won't work doesn't make them enemies,she should let him know her mind before jumping into conclusion.
    There is no point deceiving him,let him know it can't work and you can both discuss the way forward,hear his response before involving third party.

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    Replies
    1. Thanks for this sensible advice. She does not have to marry him and they don't have to be enemies either .

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  8. First thing first, she should make sure the man knows she has called off the wedding. I believe if he's not a useless man, he should be willing to provide for the child's upkeep.

    She should have a sit down with him after she's made it known that she has called off the wedding so they will decide the way forward for their kid. Let them agree on what he's expected to do for the kid.

    I don't think she should start taking any drastic measures except he explicitly states that he will not play his role as a father or even hints at it.

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  9. How do people date someone they can't talk to, normal communication between her and the guy will resolve whatever ish is ongoing between them? Didn't she see the signs before agreeing to marry him, hope someone isn't convincing her to dump him for some flimsy reasons? She should sit down with the guy and iron things out... p

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    Replies
    1. Abeg help me type all these in caps.

      I wonder oooo..if u see the way my wife n I communicate like say God created us on the same day

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    2. Of course the whole thing was premeditated by the lady. The guy in question doesn’t seem ‘useless’ as you can see he doesn’t even want his baby born out of wedlock and that tells he’s not one to go with the baby daddy package so she had to agree to marry him so he can freely get her pregnant which is just what she wants due to the age factor. Now she’s gotten what she wanted she still needs him to set her up for the baby mamma VIP lifestyle subscription. This is rapidly becoming a popular scheme albeit an utterly heartless one. What kinda fraud should we call this? Big Booty Mechanic

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    3. Pure fraud o

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  10. Stella..are u pondering on what I'm thinking of before making the above comment?

    Will you be at her beck and call when the man decides not to take responsibility for the child?


    This tough

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  11. Tell us his attitude let’s advise if it can work or not.
    Also she’s pregnant and those hormones can’t be trusted

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  12. He should pay for accommodation ke,are you high?she hasn’t given birth sef and you’re already asking for accommodation.The man didn’t say he’s not doing again,your sister got pregnant and decided to eat her cake and have it like most Nigerian women do these days cos I don’t believe that she noticed some new behavior crap.In a sane society ,all he owes is child support and if she cannot afford her own accommodation,she should give the child to the man if he has somewhere he lives.These thing y’all do where you turn the man into an atm because you have a child for him needs to stop.

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    Replies
    1. Please shout it

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    2. Haaaah..anon 16:16 someone would have thought I typed this. If I’d seen this comment Before making mine, it’d would have saved me some seconds. My comment is right above yours. Big Booty Mechanic

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  13. So at 39yrs, your sis is expecting the man to pay her rent and take total responsibility for the baby. You guys are jokers. All I see here is someone who thinks the idea of baby mama is easy because people are parading it to be. If she will be calling off the wedding, she shouldn't expect 100% provision from the man. To be on the safe side, it is better she is independent, if she must tow this road.

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  14. Dear poster,

    You didn't state the attitude or offense of the guy to enable us advice you better.

    Nevertheless, have a discussion with the guy let him know you are calling off the wedding. So from his response you would deduce what next to do.

    Good luck.

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    Replies
    1. I pray he takes it in well and agrees not to marry her for the good of everyone as it would be DOA if it later pulls through. Knowing her original intention, they would hardly genuinely love each other. Big Booty Mechanic

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  15. The tip
    Wait for your bride price to be paid before having sex🎈

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    Replies
    1. They won't hear unfortunately.

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    2. Many of these girls try to milk the man using pregnancy, only to run into this kind of hitch.
      They try too hard to copy the whites not remembering that the law works there to protect kids of such.
      It is moral depravity. And this poster is the one, she is only pretending to avoid the backlash.

      Delete
  16. Poster I hope your friend intention wasn't just to try and see if she can have a baby because of her age? Well if she is no longer interested in the marriage, best thing is to discuss with him and find how you can co-parent and raise the unborn child. If you think authorities in Nigeria can make people pay Child support then you are living in a Lala land.

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    Replies
    1. Of course it was.. your first paragraph.

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  17. Poster, you and your sister are thieves.
    He will pay for accommodation before and after giving birth.
    Ina agbani! You try well well!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Financial and Seminal fraudsters! Big Booty Mechanic

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  18. Does child support include accommodation i think not. If the lady doesn't have accommodation, it is highly likely that the court will rule the man gets his child that is if the case if this issue goes to court. I am thinking out loud, how do you reject a man and his marriage proposal and expect him to be paying for accommodation in the name of looking after his child? #via puzzled

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. This!!!
      Better make space in your house for your sister, poster, otherwise custody may go to the father.
      I nụkwa m pay her rent.
      Yall are watching too much American reality shows

      Delete
  19. My case is similar to yours, but no abuse or violence, the problem I have with him is that he is not sincere and has lied to me so many times, he has a child with another woman. I have never been to his place since 3years we started dating, anytime I want to go to his place 1 story will surface, he has said he wants to get a new apartment. He keeps saying I will go and see your parents next month to another month

    I am keeping my child, he is not even aware of the pregnancy.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. He is a liar. Could be he’s already married you know. 3 years and he’s never taken you to his place.
      Don’t push it. Just birth your baby and I pray God sees your through.

      Delete
  20. TheRighteousMan5 May 2022 at 18:10

    Please I will advise you open up to him about your intention to call off the wedding since you've made up your mind. I don't see any reason to hide or to be fraudulent about this when you already knew what you actually wanted.
    Regarding the pregnancy, I think he might be of the impression that you only used him as a sperm donor and you were not actually interested from the onset. Consequently, I think he might not want to be fully involved. He might however decide to be involved in the child's life if he's got proof that the child is his, i.e if the child resembles him or through DNA.

    Let me even ask, what is it with you ladies that makes you think your habits in a relationship is not worse than that of your partner?
    You mentioned that this guy has some attitudes that have become intolerable, does your sister think her own attitudes and habits are 100% perfect?
    Please tell your sister to free the guy to work on himself.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. @18:10,
      Most women who send chronicles here only admit being a handful in relationships with men. So I goggled the word handful. From what I saw, the synonyms of the word, especially in respect of an adult person, was just a letter short of being narcissistic.

      Delete
  21. Hi poster,does your sis knows the journey to be a baby mama isn't an easy task?. especially someone like her that doesn't have any means of survival in this harsh situation of Nigeria!.pls let her be ready for the repercussion when e set o
    Una Don see mugu now,I pray he dumps your sorry ass,then u LL know the true meaning of burden.cancel wedding and move on with your full chest,which one come be accomodation bla bla bla.
    39ko
    12ni

    ReplyDelete
  22. Poster, you can easily convince the child's father to bear financial responsibility so long as he doesn't doubt his paternity of the child or feel having been had or about to be used.

    But your demand for accommodation may be a tough one.

    It appears you are already demanding the rights and benefits of a fully married woman going away on proved grounds for divorce. Meanwhile, all you have said against the man are alleged speculations.

    And by the way, I hope you know Lady Stella was just teasing with some of her suggestions. Read all in context and note her paragraph 2.

    ReplyDelete
  23. Poster if truly your sister abi frufri doesn't want this guy she'll never want to birth his child. You guys are lying you want to milk this guy cos he's obviously rich.He should pay for accommodation,at 39 where is she staying,on a tree abi where.una be thieves ole barawo.If she no want marry let her abort aftrall sleeping with a man u arent married to is a sin too all sin na sin QED.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. God bless you, she don't even have right to select man sef cos na liability she be, nonsense

      Delete
  24. A 39yr old woman still looking for a man that will pay her house rent, na wa oo, so what was she doing with her life since, she is even a liability, the guy na God wan save him from burden, pls I have not advise for a grown woman depending on a man, cos we all left you there long time ago

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  25. After all said and done, make sure you don't abort that baby. Cos your life will also be at risk.
    Whatever happens after childbirth, only God know.?

    ReplyDelete
  26. You could not tell us just one out of his numerous “attitudes” she can’t tolerate anymore.
    What authority please? Lmao.
    I love most of the comments here today.
    Don’t go and look for work, you hear.

    ReplyDelete
  27. To be very frank here..... Poster Me think, you are not being truthful with this chronicle. It's sooo one sided, and would never wish this for somebody's son. You guys are already envisaging how to carry out your orchestrated plan without thinking of any repercussion. Your "sister" should be prepared financially and otherwise for whatever comes out from this una plan . My one Cent 👌👌

    ReplyDelete
  28. The pregnancy is "Her miracle" at 39.

    The expected baby is "His baby and responsibility" for life.

    When a man enables a woman's miracle at age 39, shouldn't she be grateful to the man instead of billing him for life?

    I am asking for a male friend.

    ReplyDelete
  29. Just tell us you found out the man is married and you don't want to become second wife.

    ReplyDelete
  30. No be only guys dey do use and dump again o. She got pregnant for him, have a baby and money to finance her life style which is a win win gir her. You and your friend na scammers

    ReplyDelete
  31. To be very frank here..... Poster Me think, you are not being truthful with this chronicle. It's sooo one sided, and would never wish this for somebody's son. You guys are already envisaging how to carry out your orchestrated plan without thinking of any repercussion. Your "sister" should be prepared financially and otherwise for whatever comes out from this una plan . My one Cent 👌👌

    ReplyDelete
  32. This just has loopholes all over it.
    Dear poster, for reasons best known to you, you decided to send in half truths.
    Why do people send in chronicles with half truths to try turn things in their favor?
    You dated a man for a while yet didn't sense in the least bit that he has abusive tendencies?
    And then you decide to pull out and you couldn't communicate it to him either directly or through someone who can talk to him?
    Yet you are already planning on how to condition him to rent you a house and pay your bills?
    Perhaps he is a married man and you have been using him for money, knowing fully well you weren't ready to settle with him? Or maybe he's not exactly your dream man but you still want his money without having him, so have his baby and be collecting money for upkeep..
    Your story no straight abeg. You sound like a schemer. Not a victim.

    ReplyDelete

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