Stella Dimoko Korkus.com: Couch Convo - Polygamy Is Not For Small Minds

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Thursday, May 12, 2022

Couch Convo - Polygamy Is Not For Small Minds

 You cannot claim to Love a man and marry him and then hate his other wives and display a pepper them attitude!







 

  

35 comments:

  1. Naso oooooooo


    Na for matured men but come to think of it...Is polygamy a good business to venture into?

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    1. It's not a good business venture. It's the men that will suffer the most. Na to dey pay bills upon bills. And if he starts defaulting in the payment of upkeep to his wives, peace will run far away from him. Money that he is meant to use for building projects, having a side business, planning to japa with his family e.t.c, he go dey use am to pay bills upon bill for his families. Na sufferhead dey kill such men, financial stress, mental stress, physical stress and the rest. I no dey pity any man wey go into polygamy.

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    2. Try it @your own risk

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    3. Saying it is not for small minds is neither here nor there. In my opinion,
      it is small minded people, people who lack the presence of mind to be disciplined and content that dabble in polygamy.

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    4. There are also monogamous long distance couples doing well. If you want to make a relationship work you can make it work. But only if it is a priority to you.

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  2. Polygamy is not even healthy both to the man and women

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    1. Especially for the men, the problems that come with polygamy kill them faster than they think

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  3. Polygamy is an anomaly no matter how you want to look at it. God didn't make it so. God made Adam and Eve..not Adam, Eve and Evelyn and definitely not Adam and Steve.

    A lot of men will answer to God for the choices that they made and the way they treated their wives. God will judge us all. You can't be hurting your wife like this and think Heaven is okay with it.

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    1. You are using your religion to judge everybody. Don’t forget not everybody serves “your” God. E.g Mercy’s husband. He is a muslim, and is permitted to marry up to four, if he decides to practice that, how would God judge him?

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  4. I think people who practice this culture can understand better. I feel there should be a discussion between partners before a third party comes in. And if it happens, its the man's responsibility to main peace and ensure mutual respect and love among them without displaying a one sided love and affection. Better still keep them both apart or stick to one woman.

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  5. Those in polygamous home how far? Im not a fan of it.........
    Bbjac

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  6. In the case of Mercy Aigbe’s husband, my opinion is different.
    1. He is a muslim and islam permits his decision
    2. I read that his wife is permanently based abroad, for God’s sake, as a man, if he permanently doesn’t have a wife here, how do you expect him to satisfy his sexual needs, not just sex, what of the companionship? Once or twice in a year? Is that even healthy for the 2 of them?. If you say what about the woman? I’d tell you that, since is is the one that permanently relocated, not him, it is presumed that she is the one that deserted, had she wanted to keep her home, she would have been where her husband is. You can’t eat your cake and have it.

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    1. They both agreed to relocate the family abroad. I hope Kazim would have been the happiest man on earth if he read about his wife marrying another man on blogs while they were still married. Selfish bunch!!!

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  7. Any woman that agrees to marry an already married man is a woman of low morality.
    No well brought up woman who values her worth, has integrity and is not greedy
    will see another woman's home and agree to be a second or third wife? 🦚🦚🦚🦚

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    1. 15.38 is your conscience pinching you?

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    2. Loud it. It's women with low self esteem and zero integrity that date married men, not to talk of marrying them

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  8. Another yeye talk @Akporaro. Person wey no love herself na im you expect to love her "rival" ba? Abi na the one wey don dey house already you expect to dey love the additional wife that she didn't consent to? The children if not influenced might love one another but the adults involved na scam-love. The man who brings in a competition for his "#1 angel" na scam. The woman who agrees to compete with his #1 na scam because rarely does anyone enjoy being tagged #2 or second best. Then the madam who agrees to all of it too na cruise.

    I remember whilst in school, I watched one interview of T.W.O. where Wunmi Obe was asked what her reaction would be if Tunde married a second wife or got someone else pregnant. She simply said the invaluable friendship she had with her husband would cease whether she stayed or left. Today, I totally understand what she meant. How do I exclusively share my innermost feelings with you when you are most likely going to share it with another person who sees me as a rival. That's like giving you extra bullets to shoot me na. Who dey zuzu? In Nigeria where Northern moslems are thought to be most accommodating of polygamy, we've read several stories of violence/homicide resulting from the practice in recent years. Wives killing their husbands, rivals, even setting them ablaze.

    My take on polygamy is "no take". Divorce one before you marry another if you are no longer interested in the first or get the permission of the first before you marry the second, 3rd or 100th. Practicing emergency polygamy from the backyard and trying to force it down your spouse's throat is the height of wickedness and insensitivity. I know a woman who "begged" her husband to take a second wife because
    she couldn't keep up with his sexual needs. She decided that everyday jigijigi after ten years and 3 children was not best for her health. It took Oga 3 years and plenty family meetings
    to agree and they were Muslims. A woman like that cannot cry blue murder when a second wife arrives because she signed off on it. Personally, I don't see my Shoprite door opening for any "shopper" that I know has just finished shopping at SPAR. My body nor go even move samsam! STIs/STDs are real.

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    Replies
    1. πŸ‘πŸ‘πŸ‘πŸ‘πŸ‘

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    2. πŸ‘πŸ½πŸ‘πŸ½πŸ‘πŸ½πŸ‘πŸ½πŸ‘πŸ½πŸ‘πŸ½

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    3. God bless you for this.
      You can’t force someone to accept and love another person especially when that person came in as a thief and a destroyer of your home.

      May must have suspected that girl for months and even confronted her hubby about it, he’d have lied and even called her a “whore” like mercy’s new hubby did. Yet you are expected to love that same woman. Are you Jesus Christ?
      It’s so easy to say, but if reverse was the case, would they accept such?
      As much as divorce is painful, it’s best you divorce the first then bring in the second, don’t force someone to accept something you won’t take, it’s like telling someone to drink poison.
      Nigerian women have to stop seeing marriage like a big deal, you give these men so much audacity.
      My marriage great but Walahi if it wasn’t I will walk away.
      Like I always say, my happiness and peace are very important to me.


      Push up (original)

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    4. Amebonawork,what do you expect from someone bearing Princess Akpararo? I even thought it's a comedian. Poster, go outside go touch grass abeg, you mustn't comment on everything!!!

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  9. Polygamy is evil. The women are always claiming they love each other until when the man die, you will understand that there is no love between the women that is involved.

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  10. What about the fight between them ? The man must love one more but will always pretend for the sake of peace in his home.

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    Replies
    1. How is it humanly possible to love 2 or more people equally when some parents don't even love their children equally?

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  11. Real matterπŸ‘Œ. If you wan run polygamy, just accept everything that comes with it...including sharing of d**k.

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  12. Hmm, my dad was telling me the other day that it’s unfortunate that our generation is gradually normalizing what their fathers practiced. They saw the dangers and swore not to ever put their families that lifestyle. He even said women even condone indirect polygamy by saying even a man cannot stay with just one woman.
    My dad was brought up in a polygamous family, he lost 3 siblings to it. His mothers co wife swore that my grandmother will never have a son before her. True to her words any time my grandma had a boy she will bring a native doctor home the child will mysteriously die. My grandma had to go to her parents place when she wanted to have my dad, according to the story the day he was born the battle was heavy. They battled to save him . They even taught he was already dead so they kept him by the side corner before they later heard him crying(his navel was already decaying at birth). Meanwhile, her co wife who was back home in another village who shouldn’t have an idea of what was going on was telling everyone that as usual that my grandma lost the baby
    For years when we if mistakenly forget anything outside overnight my dad will throw it away because of the things he saw. He said jazz everyday. Keep your shoe outside wake up and see blood etc on it

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    1. Polygamy brings more evil than we can think of.

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    2. Jealousy, bitterness, unhealthy competition, fake love and disunity.

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  13. My mom was a third wife at 16 not by choice but by her father's decision who bundled her to the next available man's house because she was an orphan and we, her children paid for it dearly.

    We begged to feed, and school etc. My dad was hypertensive but he had to start soaking Kpokpogarri at a point to take Alabukun because my elderly half brothers and sisters didn't want him to share the money they give him with us!

    16 years after my father's death, the distrust and hatred continue.

    Polygamy is a curse!

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  14. What do we call the women who knowingly agree to be second, third, fourth, etc baby mamas birthing children serially at same time with other baby mamas.

    What do we call men who have multiple baby mamas birthing children with them.

    Some fights and battles in monogamous marriages between husbands and wives, between parents and children and between children dwarf those in some polygamous homes.

    Serial monogamy as repeatedly advocated by some of us has never solved the issue of marital challellenges.

    Mankind really need to appraise unrealistic rules of marriages imposed by society and law without regard for the capacity of the marriage partners.

    Experience has shown that successful and faithful monogamous marriages are most times the work of one partner while successful, faithful, happy and mutually beneficial monogamous marriages are the work of both partners who usually refuse to conform with the society's rules for marriages.

    Most times, people who preach monogamy and want just the basic successful and faithful monogamous marriage are unwilling to carry the can. They want their partner to carry it. That is why successful, faithful, happy and mutually beneficial monogamous marriages are rare.

    Yes, somebody may ask what is the diffrence between a successful marriage and a successful, happy and mutually beneficial marriage. The explanation is "mutually beneficial".

    Question is : Even the monogamous marriages are troubled. What therefore is the big deal over polygamous marriages. Except where a person is a true believer and practitioner of a religion that abhors and prohibits it.

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  15. Some women here dey yarn yen yen yen cos dem no know how many kids or families dem get behind dem

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