Doctor Freaks Journal - Polygamy: Perspective, Musings And Misconceptions

 Polygamy is the practice of marrying multiple spouses.

Perspective and Musings:


"News travels fast in places where nothing much ever happens" -Charles Bukowski. 

I do not need to bore you with details of Yul Edochie's past escapades and latest confession. The deed has been done. He has manned up and taken it. Shall we now proceed to some other fundamental issues?


Should I start this piece by demystifying some myths surrounding polygamy, before proceeding to other issues? 

I do not pretend to be an authority in any religion, however, to the best of my limited knowledge of three or so religions, I am aware that none of the dominant religions in my part of the globe actually proclaims that polygamy is a sin.

 Christianity only stipulates that before a man can occupy certain positions in the church, he must be a husband of one wife and I stand to be corrected that the Holy Bible did not pronounce that "thou shall not marry more than one wife," expressly. (Please note, this is neither an endorsement nor condemnation of polygamy from the writer.)

 I am not eminently qualified to speak for other religions. In fact, most of the men used mightily in the Old Testament practised polygamy, from Abraham to Israel to David to Solomon, etc. Further, the writer's grandparents were polygamists, whilst the father was a monogamist (the first in his generation.)


What then is the writer driving at? We are close now. Why polygamy? I have always asked myself this question and over the years I have attempted to hazard a guess which I intend to share with my readers anon.

What I have done is to undertake a case study by grouping men into very loose classes.


The first class is that category of men who purposed in their hearts to marry more than one wife either before they even got into the marital institution at all, or after. In recent times some have even taken the bold step of marrying two or more on the same day and at the same venue. Those are the real men.



The second category is that class of men who became too comfortable with their "side-chics" or "lover" to that extent where they saw nothing wrong in having more than one wife and they decided to take the bull by the horn by legalising the external affair.



The third category is the class of men who though not at home with "side-chics" or "lovers" but they were either "careless" or got set up by their smarter "side-chics" or "lovers" who decided to lock them with pregnancy and boom, the man is hooked, for life! This is one of the commonest in my generation. Initially the man will protest, but at the end "nko?" "He go collect."



The fourth is a group of men who though married (happily or unhappily) but have always felt a void or at some point started feeling there is a void in their lives which can only be filled by the presence of another woman in their lives. It may be for social or pecuniary reasons, but they just have to do it. This class "en," you can't stop them. Just wish them well as a woman and go and develop yourself. Bros must marry a "status-wife."



The fifth may sound funny, but it is not. Some men out there really do not believe in this institution called marriage. They are simply "spe#m donors" and they are forever willing and ready to donate wherever and whenever. Can you even regard these ones as polygamists?



The sixth is a peculiar one. They never set out to marry more than one but the vicissitudes of life has pushed them in and out of marriage more than once. They are what we call "a victim of circumstances."



The seventh ought to have been the first really. We have this category of men who actually have little or no say when it comes to marriage. The decision is for their family members to take either before, during or after their first marriage. If they like, let them go and marry Miss World, when their family members are ready, they will bring a bride that would be acceptable to them. This class "en," you need prayers.



The eighth one is the most controversial. Some women actually push their husbands to other women outside (and vice-versa.) I won't say much in this regard. The victims and actors know better. My one cent is that a woman should never make her husband more comfortable in the arms of another woman outside. My female readers may also say, "some men are d#gs" now. Yes, some are. May the good Lord deliver them.


The list is endless and you may actually add yours.


May I at this stage make it clear that the essence of this write-up is not to sit in the comfort of my dingy room and be passing a verdict on the practitioners of polygamy, no, far from it. My aim is to critically analyse why men go into this agelong practice which some "imported" religions and human experience have condemned over the years.




Conclusion:


Please before you form any opinion in respect this issue of polygamy, dig critically with a view to finding out why a man made or would make that choice.

Is polygamy a sin? I haven't seen that in any holy book yet.
Is polygamy good or bad? Who am I to condemn your choice or that of anyone else?

Will I ever consider polygamy? Never. So help me God.