If you did checks, what did you do with the info you found out? Did you call off the relationship/ wedding because of bad findings? or you went ahead and damned the consequences?
Did the checks you did save you from a one chance situation?
Do you also believe it is good to find out who your spouse is accountable to before dating or marrying them so that you can know who to ' report' them to? Does having someone to report them to make them a better person? Does it change anything?
Do you have a first hand information of this issues i raised or hear say that happened to someone else?
Lets gist!
Me I check who can handle my mood swings that starts weeks before my flow. I can't help it so let's manage it. If you can't abeg shift don't come and stress me. The mood swing is stress enough.
ReplyDeleteThat thing can fustrate someone atimes.
DeleteMe too, I always confess about it and apologies in advance lol
DeleteSte you see that checking eh it's very mkpacious.
DeleteIn Igbo Land it's called Iju Ase( a window period when intending in-laws do underground FBI on each other. Usually for a month or up to 6months.
These verification steps are what secures a greater part of the woman's stay in a family she's getting into.
What you see is what you get because curses don't go away,they go from generation to generation that's why many families pacify the victims immediately a sin is committed. It affects family growth and unity.
My dad has register sef,him and his uncles they follow it line by line before approving any marriage.
They call it Onye bu nna gi(who's your father?)
Whether you're rich or poor is not their business.
They'll verify :
Bloodline,curses,OSU
caste system,cannibalism, ogbanje and religious inclination ,family evil altar, abominable acts the "gods" were not appeased for, descendants sold into slavery and the top of all Hot Temper.
None of his daughters married a hot tempered man, no way for the 6 of us. One initially married a Prince, Harvard trained bloke who hid his temperament wella until he threw her off a storey building,the marriage ended that day.
She had to remarry 6years later.
It starts from there. Short man? Noooo. Tempered? Hell no!
Face front biko.
Me, I kuku marry the last of 4 brothers, if my father in-law para like this,my hubby enters inside wardrobe to hide.😂
They all fear their Dad except the first son,his own na half way fear. Owu Oga ndi Oga so e no send anybody.
But for DH,he remains Nnanna, that's his name.
Papito be like "hellooo,onye n' ekwu,kedu nnaa, give him his phone". If you're Igbo you'll understand the name Nnaa🤭
They don't believe he's fully grown sef 🤭😂
He doesn't like it but I like it like that biko. If a man has some person's he's afraid of, he "COMPORTS HIMSELF" kawai.
If he do pim,I dial my parents in-law one time. And I'm Safe. Very safe.💞💃
Oh wow
DeleteShort man??
DeleteMom Ella
DeleteShort man short fuse or short temper is mostly the case
My darling I wish this tradition never dies...I married a short man devil from a family of 3 divorcees and too chop breakkie. Nwa afor like me. Chaiiii
DeleteSp, I always like and look forward to your gists. Keep it up.
DeleteIts best you know and understand your partner before marriage.To know the type of family one is getting him/herself into.marriage is a lifetime commitment,so one need to make thorough check before going into it.
ReplyDeleteLol ..
ReplyDeleteIf you suspect your partner isn't straight forward, hiding past, manipulative, having too many uncles and cousins, hiding age, playing victims and all..
Me I'll advise you just bounce, but if you insist, then use a Private Investigator to get all the necessary infos you need..
Better safe than sorry ✌️
Your last paragraph.
Delete🙌
The Gospel Truth
#verify
After we started dating officially, I'm from the South, she's from the east. I travelled to her state, her village is developed, with good amenities, I lodged and Introduced myself to the manager as a research student doing a story on indigenous cultural practices and I need a guide. He offered to be one for a fee. He drove me to their village head whom I asked lots of questions, then casually tipped in the paternal name of my fiancee that I have a friend from here bearing that name. He told me about the family that her GGF and GF were banished for practising a violent type of dark magic. When I suggested that my guide should take me to their homestead, the village head said, they were also OSU and went further to explain it. Then topped it up that if I want to be more than friends with any member of that family, I should fortify myself. My trip ended, went back and asked my woman more about her family and I would like to visit and see her parents, she said no need, that they can come to Lagos instead. Evaded most of my questions and branded me inquisitive. That was how I backed out.
ReplyDeleteSmart move💯
DeleteHmmm
DeleteWow
DeleteEyyaaa,but if she came clean would you have married her still?some of them are just victims of circumstance.
DeleteApart from the dark magic part of her bloodline, I see nothing wrong in marrying an OSU especially as you are non-Igbo. No one is gonna mock you and say negative things about you.
DeleteThey are just victims of circumstances. I feel sad that she didn't open up to you being a southerner. The dark magic part can be overcome through prayers
She should have opened up to you. That would have made a whole lot of difference
DeleteTeemah...it's not true.
DeleteMost Igwes hold meetings with churches,fix dates for ceremonies and appease the gods openly at 4-way junctions in their towns but when an OSU comes to marry their daughter,they refuse.
Please verify.
In 2022? It's still not abolished.
Let the Igwes lead the way so others can follow.
A great percentage of the ladies end up marrying non-Igbos and oyibos.
Hold their igbankwu wedding ceremonies in the cities.
That's where the Igbo man is till today.
My friend will always tell me to investigate, like serious investigation o, she learnt that from her mum. Anytime she brings a suitor her mum will investigate the person down to their village and even visit her daughter’s suitor and asked detailed questions till the relationship will crash. She brought a rich guy and I asked her if her mum investigated this one and she said NO, that her mum wants her to get married to this one 😂😂 she is even pregnant and her parents are begging the guy to rush things up. African Parents will not kill somebody
ReplyDelete🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
Delete🤣🤣🤣🤣
DeleteMy family was suspicious of the fiancé of one of my cousins but she refused to listen as she was in love. They hired a private investigator who discovered that the man had an extensive criminal record plus a huge number of lies he had told my cousin. Once she saw the proof, no one had to tell her to walk away.
ReplyDeletePeople should always investigate potential partner...the background...parents. Matters cos Yorubas say omo buruku se fe, ana buruku ni ko se fe. A bad inlaw is worse than a bad spouse.
ReplyDeleteVery important to investigate ooo, if my sister has investigated she wouldn't have end up with this devil and his family in agbada.
DeleteWhen it get to my kids turn I will so much investigate oooo.
Keep it in mind for your children's time. Cos it's easy to get carried away and forget.
DeleteI did not investigate but I'm glad we got introduced to an older couple (I would call them our mentors) who guided us when we had issues. My husbands brain was paining him.
ReplyDeleteAny small thing, Im not doing again. Till i called his bluff and even went ahead to call divorce lawyer.
Anyways they stepped in and my husband listened. We hold them in high regard.
So ALWAYS have someone your spouse listens to. Marriage can really get overwhelming at times and superior guidance may be needed.
Also, whatever you do, check anyone you are about to get married to spiritually. Ask God to reveal what he should reveal to you or what you should know. Works 10 out of 10 times.
Bye
Mma Nwachukwu
Investigation is very good before marriage but most ladies especially have been blinded by money or love that they refused to oblige to any form of investigation on their men.
ReplyDeleteMy mum specifically warned us not to marry from far distances so that it will be easy to go down and investigate our partners before marriage.
It saved us from a lot of stress. Apart from the normal husband and wife little disagreements, nothing serious.
Is that even a question?
ReplyDeleteEven before DATING, you had better INVESTIGATE.
Too many mad people roaming freely without chains. 🚶♀️
Gaskiya
DeleteI will investigate if I finally find love, I need to investigate to avoid stories that touch.look before you leap is very necessary, confirm about their family background to be sure if you have enough anointing to fight the battle coming forth.
ReplyDeleteMy husband and I are from the same town though my family still did investigation and everything was fine so we got married, It was later after we had married I knew that his family also did thorough investigation on my family too😀
ReplyDeleteNa so na.
DeleteCoded moves 😂
Correct family let both families investigate each other
Delete