Chronicle Of Blog Visitor Narrative

Hmmm....

STAND ALONE NARRATIVE

UNGRATEFUL SON

Hello Stella and BVS;

 I made a certain decision but I need your views on it.

I am a single mother who raised my kids alone (a boy and girl), their dad left me for another woman years ago. Through my family’s help I was able to secure a well paying job, so financially I was stable plus the help of my family.

As at 2015 my first child who happens to be a boy came to me that He had interest to study abroad (USA) for his masters as at that time my girl was still senior secondary school. When I looked at the financial cost it was too much for me and I didn’t want to stress my family, i explained to my Son but he kept on begging and insisting we find a solution or take a loan. As at that point I opened up to my boss if He could help me secure a loan, He said he would give me all the money I needed but I must sleep with him. I rejected his offer and went to another top boss who I was introduced to by my friend, He too insisted on sleeping with me.

At this point I refused and told my Son the money won’t be possible to get, this boy was practically crying and pleading for me to help and as a mother I couldn’t bear to see him sad. At last I slept with my boss who I became a mistress to for few years (a decision I regret) that was the agreement we signed before he gave me the full money I used to sponsor my son abroad. While studying I still was sending him money steadily untill he secured a job after masters (he is a software engineer).

I hoped when he became stable he would be able to help me sponsor his sister as she was pursuing a degree in nursing (he promised he would). I was the sole sponsor of my daughter’s education and my family helped out too, my son never helped out as he was always complaining of bills and abroad isn’t a bed of roses, I believed him and never stressed him out ( although he sent clothes and sent money to me on few occasions). When my daughter was about rounding up I told him about her intention to do a top up course abroad immediately she finishes, My Son told me he won’t be able to help out because he didn’t have the means as he is out of job due to Covid. 

I told him I would pay for visa processing and flight and upkeep. This boy still insisted he wasn’t financially capable to help out, That abroad isn’t easy and there are no much jobs (he said he was doing security work). At this point my daughter called to see if there would be a way out as par brother and sister, maybe she would work for about 2 years in Nigeria and see if by then things would be financially ok but this boy told her to go and ask her father for money.

 He further went to say we keep on disturbing him blah blah blah (I still forgave him). They both had verbal argument which I tried to resolve.

2 months ago a distant colleague of mine told me her daughter knows my son and they both work in the same tech company. She was just congratulating me that my son is a big man over there, that her daughter told her he is the head of their branch where she works and a lot.

 At this point I was confused but didn’t show it, I told her to give me the company’s name and all which she did. I looked it up online and behold I saw my son’s profile and all, I was shocked because this boy told me he works as a security in a hospital and things weren’t so good for him. To find out he has achieved so much and even married with a child and kept lying to me and hardly supports me. I was devastated (highest money this boy has given me is 100k).

 At this point I felt betrayed after all the sacrifices I made for this child only for him to turn out ungrateful, to the extent I sold my self (I always put myself last).

I called him and confronted him with my findings and all, he started pleading and asking for forgiveness but it was too late i was hurt badly and I blocked him everywhere. He called the family to beg me without explaining to them what he did, when I told them they where dumbfounded too but pleaded with me to forgive him as a mother but I refused this time I decided to put myself first and ensure I have retirement savings.

 My family offered to help my daughter and I told her I would only help her where my money can (ain’t going out of my way to sacrifice for no child no more).

It’s been weeks since I spoke to my son but I am at peace and not ready to speak to him as I have lost trust and somewhat love for him, pls did I do wrong by blocking and letting him be? My family keep saying as a mother I should forgive, I ain’t supposed to be upset and all. I personally want to focus on me and prepare for my old age and as at now I don’t even trust my daughter (she has been a good and understanding child) but this issue has left me feeling I cannot trust any one including my beloved daughter. I have given so much of me to my kids, what did I do wrong that my son turned out to be just like his father?

I am on the road to secure myself 100% so I don’t become a burden to anybody.

OMG!!!... I am shocked!

You have done well please forgive him, unblock him but expect nothing from him. he wont change...

You asked how he became like his Father? E dey him blood.

Pleas also forgive yourself for whatever sacrifices you made for him.....I feel horrible reading this Chronicle!