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Friday, February 10, 2023

Chronicle Of Blog Visitor Narrative

Hmmmm...



STAND ALON NARRATIVE
A SHOCKING STORY TO LEARN FROM...


Hello Stella,

Sequel to the stories shared here, of single mothers and their children , and the woman who cursed her daughter, I want to share this True story told me by my mum. Mum is almost 70 ......

When they were younger, her friend from same village, same age group and community, became pregnant as a teenager. In those days, it was a huge taboo. The young man responsible for the pregnancy denied ever knowing her.

The lady was devastated. She was labelled an ahewo and expelled from "umu Mary" in church, her parents also were expelled from the church and major groups, as was the practice then. It was so shameful and devastating for her and her family.

She gave birth to a bouncing baby boy and devoted her life to taking care of him. Needless to say, she never got married because as was the custom then, she had been "tainted". She suffered to train him through school and he graduated and moved to Lagos.

One of those days, he came drunk and red eyed with a knife threatening his mother to tell him who his father was. He said his friends had been mocking him as someone who has no father nor knew where he came from. She had all through his growing up adamantly refused to tell him about his father, due to the hurt and betrayal from him.

So when she saw that the son was ready to kill her and kill himself if she didn't tell him the story, she told him everything. The story, the betrayal, His father's name, village, lineage etc.

He sobered up and thanked her. Secretly, he went in search of his father. Got to the compund, met a man who was staring at him strangely. The man was the father's elder brother, and the boy was just the carbon copy of his father. Apparently the father had gotten married but had no children from his wife. The whole family welcomed the boy heartily as their long lost son.

The boy later took his father to Lagos, lodged him in his new apartment, changed his clothing and made him very comfortable. After a month of staying with his father, he invited his mother (who still stays in the village) to come and see his new apartment. The woman came happily and was admiring the whole house, singing and rejoicing.

She heard someone open the door from one of the rooms and saw the man who betrayed her years ago coming out , well dressed in "chieftancy" amd smiling. She became "mad". She rushed at him and attacked him with hands, nails, teeth, everything.. It took two people who her son had called to help to pull the man out of her grips and he was smuggled out of the house.

She felt so betrayed by her son. A house she who all her years suffered to train him had not seen, this man was already living in and enjoying before her son deemed it fit to invite her over.

She looked at her son and cursed him with all the pain and anger she felt. That it was because he was seeing money , thaf he would beg for food etc... It was a heavy curse. She angrily left the house and went back home.

Within a short time, the boy indeed lost all. He couldn't renew his rent and had to move back to the village to his mum. He apologised to her and they have been praying to him to find his feet again since then...

My mum when she visited, asked her friend why she cursed her son and she said it was the pain that blinded her.

Moral of story, circumstances may make a very good mother curse her child, also, the fact that you as a woman singlehandedly trained your child doesn't guarantee that they will not look for their fathers tomorrow and vice versa


Hmmmm this is deep!...Anger can blind us to a lot.... Will the son ever get back on his feet?

51 comments:

  1. Hello Stella 🥰
    Let Go and Read Up.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Not entirely related to this story but this is why I don’t subscribe to the advice of pouring all your love and attention to kids when your husband fails to show you love, faithfulness and affection, because you tend to have so much expectations from those children when they are adults.

      A woman spends all her life time loving, and training a child then when the child grows up his wife expects her to detach from him easily, a woman who dint get love from her husband is all of a sudden supposed to switch off her emotions for a child she was advised to pour all her attention on.

      If the woman in the above story worked on her career and found an affectionate man… she won’t have felt so betrayed by her son.

      Dear men, you are your wives partners pls show them affection, be their ride or die, stop expecting them to face their kids while you go about cheating up and down.

      I really hope the woman’s son recovers all, he may have been feeling like he dint have enough time with his dad without thinking of the psychological effect it will have on his mother.


      Push up (original)

      Delete
  2. The Son can and will get back on his feet if and when the mother Revokes the Curse.
    All will be well Again

    ReplyDelete
  3. Hmmmmmmm

    It is deeper than deep Madam Stella...

    Some women fail to also understand that, single-handedly training up a child doesn't guarantee that such child will buy you more gift than his father who has long disappeared long ago.


    The above is what I noticed these days..

    Will gist u people soon shaaa

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. No please.
      I said please.

      Delete
    2. Anonymous 😂😂😂 nah all of us follow tire like this

      Delete
    3. 18:44
      That's the reality of life. Female and male children do it.

      Delete
  4. If I single handedly raise a child and the child goes out tomorrow to look for the father that abandoned us ehn, I will curse that child. That child will never know loyalty in this life. Ekwusigokwam

    Fan Emmanuel

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Pls stop, stop, stop issuing curses on children, most of us are in MFM praying to break these curses, stop it, my mom issued curses on her husband for taking another wife, in pain continue to issue curses with any provocation. NO one said it is good but mind you when you miss something, when you find it you react differently, see the case of the prodigal son, does it mean the father stop loving the first son, no, it is just the heart getting what it lost or longed for. While we should all use this as a lesson to always remember those who suffered for us and not abandon them when we get what we long for. Fan Emmanuel, pls renounce this curse immediately, go on your kneels and pray, you people should stop already issuing curses.

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    2. You are being too emotional Fan Emmanuel. That you single-handedly raised the boy doesn't mean he cant look for his dad if he decides to.

      Delete
    3. To go and look for a man that denied the pregnancy and allowed her bear all the castigation and trauma of being ostracized alone...and even move him into his house before the woman that bore it all and basically sacrificed her life to raise him.. That boy is an ungrateful fool! Did his fair weather father try to help him or disappeared again as money no dey again?

      Delete
    4. 18:13 help him gini? Does the father have what to help himself that he is leaching on the son he rejected like sponge?
      As money go, papa japa!

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    5. This story is different from that of the prodigal son please. I don't have time to analyze the difference now

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  5. This is one of the reasons I always pity those women that put their lives on hold just because of motherhood, it's better to find a way of balancing the two.

    Most children tend to move from school to husband's house, job places etc and later leave their parents to themselves. Those children you put your life on hold for to train will still leave you to search for greener pasture.

    I'm not saying you shouldn't train your kids, train them to your capabilities but never forget to train yourself too, build yourself career wise, be financially stable, enjoy yourself while training your children too, you can balance the two so that when those children are on their own, you still have a reason to live and not become a wicked mother-in-law to your children's spouses



    *Larry was here*

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. This is correct.
      Learnt this very early from my mum. Time is going. Before you open your eyes you are an old woman with so many does and don'ts. While you give your child. Please remember to give yourself.
      Don't abandon yourself because of parenting.

      Delete
    2. This!! This is what I tell myself and my friends that I will not use motherhood as an excuse not to chase my dreams.
      Eventhough I am a stay at home mum, I have businesses I run from the comfort of my home. I take courses, read, invest in things that will build me. Its tough sometimes, but I try to balance it.

      Delete
    3. This is why I tell people to stop advising women to face their kids, you will see a woman whose hubby calls her a nag because he wants to be a married bachelor and the next advice is “face your kids” “face your work”

      No honey, human interaction will forever be the first thing a human being desires, even the work we tell people to seek will not be there in old age.

      I follow a particular page on ig where the guy asks old people what they wish they did more of when they were younger and all the men say is “I hope I spent more time with family”
      You can see the sadness in most of their faces, because at the end companionship is all that really matters.


      Push up (original)

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    4. Hmmmm, 'married bachelors', unfortunately this appears to be the norm because they say it is a man's world. They see nothing wrong in leaving their spouses high and dry while they pursue multiple interests outside without remorse. Trying to have your cake and eat it is selfish and greedy. How ever you intentionally hurt people to please yourself will definitely affect you in the long run. You cannot run faster than your legs.

      Delete
  6. This is why putting God first is so important. Parents on earth is but for a moment, but God is the only true and eternal parent that can protect you from the ones on earth.

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  7. That is why it's not good to act out of anger. The mother will be regretting cursing the son. I wonder where the father is now that everything has scattered.

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  8. The son is not well
    What type of foolish surprise is that

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  9. Hmm.. this one enter oo. To think that this still happens till now is more painful. Irresponsible and deadbeat fathers abandoning the family because culture and society has reassured them that their children will still look for them and reward them for contributing to their DNA. I don't blame the woman in the story. It's not funny seeing an enemy reap the fruits of your labour.

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  10. We should always try not to provoke our mothers.

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  11. That son is so wicked and heartless. No one is saying you shouldn't look for your father but treat your mother better cos she was there for you alone. You should make her happy before going for your father.

    The boy would have kept his mother in lagos, make her comfortable before inviting his father over. That woman should enjoy more than your dad who abounded you. If your mum had left you to die like your dad did will you be enjoying life?

    ReplyDelete
  12. You people believe too much in curses
    You think God is just enforcing everything that comes out from a mother’s mouth
    If so we’re are results for all the moneys crying to God on the mountain for the kids
    It’s not curses you people’s god can enforce

    ReplyDelete
  13. I think the sperm donor of a father should also be blamed. How can a son you denied before he was born, one day come to look for you & brought you into a glory you didn't know how it came about & you couldn't ask him about his Mother, the woman you denied & knew what the consequence of your denial inflicted on her...…If he was thoughtful & reasonable he will not even come into that house talk less of any other thing...…May the Lord deliver us from situations that will make us regret in the future, Amen!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. The sperm donor sef no get shame. Child you rejected, as soon as you saw that he was successful you came waddling like a walrus.
      Pikin and papa both empty heads.

      Delete
  14. Hmmm
    We usually forget too soon.
    What the son did was very wrong he should have honoured his mom first.
    But the mother shouldn't have cursed him.
    We need to be calm and remember God first before we act. Let's not let anger take over no matter what.

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  15. I am not going to chook mouth in the matter of that woman that cursed her daughter. E get why!

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  16. Very sad. Pls mothers lets try to be more patient with our kids.

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  17. I don't blame the son, remember that he was bullied which made him almost commit suicide.He might have vowed that he will surely bring them together hence the surprise he gave his mum. But alas,it backfired. I don't blame the mother too. At the end of the day, we're all humans.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Apparently, he had good plans for his parents. But he didn't seek proper counsel from people knowledgeable in such matters.

      The Bible is ever true. It says that in the multitude of counsel a plan is established.

      But in the end, who is the loser this case. Is it not the woman? All her suffer na for nothing - totally in vain.

      Some women rejected also have their own in them even though the rejection may be adjudged wrong.

      Delete

  18. This is a frequent occurance, there is an adage in my place that says.. After you have finished training a child, the real parent is still the parent. (Ozuzu zucha onye nwe nwa nwe nwa)
    I have a good friend who is a single mum. I got tired of talking to her and decided to give her space. Don't be forming a super woman to a man who is alive. Baby mama or whatever, if the child will bear your surname. Oga you most contribute to his upkeep no matter how small. We will drag ourselves. This is Nigeria, majority of Christians look for their father at a certain time in their lives. You as the mother cannot stop them, or else you will turn to an enemy.
    If you can give a woman belle, be ready to dance to the tune.
    Imagine suffering alone. Denying yourself most good things of.life because of your child and the child goes behind you to look for the father. Some wicked father's will even lie ontopl.of the woman's head. They will claim the woman refused them access to there child. Na lie. Bros. I will give you 💯 access except if I don't want him/her to bear your name

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  19. Till date , some men or women abandon their children believing that the child will always look for them n forgive them

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  20. I have mixed feelings about this curse of a thing because the way a nation with a population of over 200 million curse their president on a daily yet he is still walking majestically 😂😂😂

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. 😂 Karma is far reaching, can cut across generations... Karma has different faces. It can be swift, or slow, or appear like it can never happen. That is why the mercy of God is so important. Let me stop here.

      Delete
  21. I’m a single mum to my son and my story is very similar to what you wrote except my son is 8 years old.

    Let me be very very clear THERE IS NOTHING ON THIS PLANT that my son will do to me that will make me curse him NOTHING. He is free to go and find his father when he is older I will never ever stop him because I know his father will surely show his true colours and my son can figure him out himself.

    My son is not my retirement plan, he didn’t ask me to bring him to this world, so I will never look to him for anything at old age. My own is to make sure my child is not useless in society and knows God

    What I want for my son is to be successful and marry and give me gran kids. That is all I need from him, anything else na jara o

    My son the rejected stone will be the chief cornerstone to feed his wicked father’s family and they shall eat it and bow to him so they can be ashamed of themselves.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. My dear focus on yourself.
      Map out a solid retirement plan.
      Look at stocks, bonds, treasury bills, etc etc.
      Think ahead for yourself.
      Leave all this archaic 'rejected cornerstone nyenyennyen.'
      The son did not ask to be born.
      Nobody should be using them as back to sender or chess pieces to prove a point.
      Son that can travel abroad and tell you he is doing security meanwhile is a top exec in a tech company sending his father and his father's side millions every year.
      What will you do? You wii kii yourself?
      Better just focus on yourself and ensure you are not depending on your child/children for anything.

      Delete
    2. Anon 18:57 did you read my comment or another comment.

      I expect nothing from my son but for him to be successful, Marry and give me gran kids.

      If he likes let him give his father millions and billions I don’t care my own is I raise my child and never abandoned him like his father did

      Delete
  22. As a single mum whose pregnancy was denied, take the pains to tell the fruit of that pregnancy the absolute truth before he starts hearing nonsense from his mates and neighbours. It shouldn't be different from when you adopt a child. Placing curses on your children is extreme and a symbol of emotional immaturity. If you always have in mind that the lives of your children do not belong you, you won't seek to dominate their lives. You are just a caretaker God is using to raise those humans.

    It is your responsibility to care and provide for your children, as your parents did for you. They don't owe you anything. It's your children's responsibility to care for their own children, not you. If they are kind enough to remember you and provide for you, it's a privilege, not a right

    Alexander

    ReplyDelete
  23. Hmm, that is why i pity this baby mama trend that is on going. These kids would one day grow up and ask you questions about their fathers, it is only natural, be ready with solid answers that would make sense, this generation of kids are smarter than you think. Some of them end up depressed because they don’t have a relationship with their dad, worse is when they start school, and they see some of their friends whose daddies come to pick them or show up for school activities, they feel sad and ashamed sometimes. They would ask questions, and to deflect the pressure of the society, no matter how bad the dad is, according to the mom, they would still be more than willing to have a relationship with him, infact they would be proud that they can also say that they have a dad.
    Eventually, every child will look for his dad, if the dad is dead, there would be uncles from the father’s side, no matter how wicked they are, it would be shameful for any child to say that they only have their maternal side, that is just our culture, na so we see am, and it aint stopping anytime soon. So this issue of cursing, women should rethink it, cos kids would always always want their daddies or father’s side in their lives.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. What I am observing is that part of Satan's plan to rubbish this generation and future ones is destroying the family structure of father, mother and children and bringing in confusion, like bringing up children as genderless, when they were naturally born with a particular gender, for them to later choose their gender, etc. So many things are going wrong because there is no basic, stable foundation. But by God's grace the gates of hell will not prevail. We all have to try to do our part to ensure that upcoming ones get it right, we mustn't leave these young ones to their devices because of how independent they can be these days. Sorry for my epistle.

      Delete
  24. Hmmmmmm some children don't care about their dads

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  25. Stop deceiving yourselves,a dead beat father dies alone,I have an uncle that rejected his daughter from the womb and claimed the lady he impregnated was possessed and a witch,the lady landed a good job,trained the daughter,got married and had other children,the lady wanted to get married and people said she should go and meet her biological father for his blessings and she asked where was the biological father when she was suffering in university to make a first class,the lady married her fiance both working in an oil company,the mother is also successful in her career and married to an equally successful man,the loser is in the village poor and dejected,so who is the winner?men stand and train your child/ children most women won't even have your time to beg you for money to train your child,women now done up their game

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Some children (male and female) look for their fathers. Some don't. There is no hard and fast rule about this matter.

      The matter is complicated when there are spiritual and or generational issues involved.

      Men and women / Husbands and wives should stop dragging their children into their battles.

      Delete
    2. Unfortunately, I see a lot of men dying old and alone. Many had good opportunities for love in their youth but wasted it. It is one of the worst things to witness, especially when you know they would have wanted better for themselves. But pride is a hell of a thing and coupled with youthful arrogance leads to destruction. The goodlooking ones thought they would be hot forever until they aged in some strange ways and discovered nobody is interested in them anymore. Some had money but lost it along the way of life and nobody looking their corner. Even the ones with money soon learn they are being tolerated for access to things and people and once that gets met they are left alone. Life can be a serious and hard lesson for an old man on his own.

      Delete
    3. That girl just got lucky, infact i pray that the husband’s family won’t mock her in future. I said she got lucky because, many families wouldn’t have agreed to marry her from her mom alone, no matter what, they would say they would meet her dad or no marriage happens

      Delete
    4. The husband family is aware of how the lady father openly denounced her while in the womb and called the mother a witch ,the news was all over the village and the lady mother was a very successful career woman b4 she got pregnant,it was the mother family that pursued the father away for branding their child as a witch, accepted the mother an the lady back to the family and supported the mother and her child to have a better life,the girl treasures her maternal family more than her paternal,the story long o,imagine a grandchild sponsoring the grandparents to come and spend time with her abroad,that's how much she loved the maternal side even up to her wedding,her grandparents were in full attendance,the man she's married to and the man's family know the story because they did their investigation before they married the lady,they also didn't want to identify with the lady father,so we move just don't think you can hurt others and go Scot free,my uncle regrets everything he put the lady through,but the lady and her mother no send my uncle.

      Delete

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