Stella Dimoko Korkus.com: Chronicle Of Blog Visitor Narrative

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Tuesday, July 02, 2024

Chronicle Of Blog Visitor Narrative

Hmmmmm...


STAND ALONE NARRATIVE
MARRIED TO A LAST BORN
This is about your post on the disadvantages and advantages of marrying a last born.
Stella, my husband, is t
he last born of his mother and father. Siblings of five.two men and three women.
This man is so so everything opposite i thought i married. He doesn't have a mind of his own, he let's his family meddled in our life decisions that even concern our children, down to even the names we name our kids. He is a very st**pd and foolish man.
I wish i could turn back the hands of time ,i will not even let someone like him be a family friend. Talk more of a spouse!!!!!!!!!
He is controlling
He is manipulative
He is toxic
He is disrespectful
He is stingy
He is a non chalant father
But he is not lazy. In fact, he likes being a suffer head for his family members, where everyone still sends him on errand while he still juggle his work. He disgusts me so much now. I can't leave him because i don't want to be separated from my children ,plus the fact that i am jobless and cannot fend for them even if i decides to run away with them!
Marrying a last born experience has been nothing short of disadvantages to my life.
He is so insensitive ,unassuming and very careless and childish. Eleven years of marriage and he still throws wet towel on the bed. He still remove his clothes and fling it or drops it on the ground instead of him to simply put it on the laundry basket in the same room.
He is very caring and loving towards any family member that will give him and damned towards people like me and his kids that have no shishi to give him.( i use to help him when i was working with some foreign NGO's) but ever since money no dey from my side ,it is one insult to another. I no blame him, i blame myself for even replying his greetings that led to a marriage many years ago.
He is an utter spoilt suffer head. I said suffer head because i have never seen a human being as confused and loves the hard life than the soft one.
I can go on and on and on....
Having to share a space with him is the most stressful thing for me now. Like ,i dread waking up to him,to his face ,his presence. I have been stylishly living in my kids room for months now, while slowly removing my things from the room we share. He doesn't even notice because he is so careless and very insensitive!
God forbid his type to even manifest in my entire lineage to come.
This marriage thing with him is choking me and i still have to be swallowing it. Where will i start from?
I am a first born married to a spoilt suffer head last born. Stella, e choke!


Stella, may i also that ?He will be 40 yrs old this year but still seats in front of the tv watching kids cartoons and laughing like a hyena.  F**lish man.
He doesn't know how to pamper his wife and kids infact he shouts and disregards us. But he can be very playful and sweet towards his nieces and nephews.  Even toward their domestic staff.
I look at him and thoughts of regret filled me. Oh,how i wish .i looked at him and saw embodiments of my life mistake.i looked at him and wished we didn't have kids together so that i will just wake up one morning and walk away. FREELY!
I am being saddled here with a boy trapped in a man's body. Whenever he opens all his 30 something teeth and be laughing like an idiot i feel like smashing his whole face with a very heavy metal! Many times i think i am losing my sanity. I cry and laugh the same time. God help me insha Allah
He is so so insecure.
Whenever i managed to start small business at home this man will initially be supportive(i don't know if he is faking) then boom ,any slight misunderstanding we have with me demanding to be regarded small,this man will change it for me and he will carry my goods and go and throw away or give it out . I have seen shege with this boy/man.
My own prayer now is to get a good paying job that will be taking me out of this house for hours everyday.  So that i will not always stay here and start nurturing thoughts of mu***ring someone!
I look ok physical but i am mentally messed up! Depression is like a water to me .its constant. I get into depression and come out again on my own with God's  help by vigorously praying.
To show you how manipulative this man is, he is voicing up and down that he is ready to set up another business for me but it seems i am not interested.  Yes, i am intentionally not interested in any business he wants to set up for me at home because i know it is a trap if the business must be at home! You know how controlling people wants to keep you in one place and at their mercy? So that any slight misunderstanding he will throw out my wares again and again and again!
If he is REALLY TRUTHFUL about setting up business for me let him get me a shop in the public! Where whenever his madness starts and he is throwing out my wares its the public people that will help me deal with him!

I have not even talked about his mother and the very negative role she is playing in my marriage! Wicked woman! That one, i make sure i made myself very scarce for her .that's how i am able to control her excesses!
Thank God we don't leave together with her again!!! I could have just committed a crime!!!!
May no first born went to marry a last born like my husband again in this life!

I don't even wish my enemies to end up with my situation in this family.
Thank God his three older sisters are very sensible people! God bless them. Their father raised them well! Because if they towed the part of their mother who is my mother in law. Ahhh there generation is finished be that
 
I have sat and think,thought, still thinking, and have come to the conclusions that; the reason he is so bossy towards i and my kids while being soft towards other of his members is because all his life he is being boss around by his parents and older siblings till he find someone and paid her bride price(myself) then he felt it is time for him to start bossing someone's daughter around(still me) and then he start to reproduce offspring (our kids),then his bossy clan starts expanding. More people to control and boss around! Left headed f**l.

He treats everyone better than myself and kids. Many times, our children have complained to me that why is their dad so gentle with their cousin's and harsh with them ,his kids? The oldest of our kids is 10
Amongst five siblings that he came from ,he is the only one who has such stupid attitude! Cos his older and only brother who is the second born treats his wife like a queen and his kids like prince and princesses!
 Ideal man who knows the value of the family he created is more important than the one he came from. 
This my husband will embarrass me anywhere o by shouting at me. Be it in their family house,for road,for market, for inside car, for filling station, for my mother place ,infact for anywhere. But sha since the beginning of this year, i made promise to myself that i will start shouting back at him thoroughly. And i have kept to my promise so far. So once he starts his madness unjustly, i too activates my kolo side of brain and we starts shouting at each other! Mad couple we are turning into. E better like that. Atleast any family gathering now, he is sure that if he shouts at me  i go retaliate sharply. So, i don't think he will likely shout at me in that their family house again because na that one dey pain me passe all his shouting junctions.  
It is well. I refused to be turn mad by him because he did not carry me a mad woman from my mama house! 
I was just a gentle,young and very naive lady that he preyed on and married! 
I did everything wrong to myself for marrying him! 
Very selfish,manipulative,controlling , STINGY child that i went to marry! Oh lord!!

Ahhh!!!!!!!
I dont even know what to say, this one choke!!!!!

76 comments:

  1. Story of my parents. Ever since I've gone to school, I don't miss them one bit. Raised in a toxic environment affects the kids. Always screaming at Each other everywhere, even in public. Smh Escaping that house was like escaping prison.
    Made sure my university is far from home so nobody disturbs my peace of mind.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I love love the way you right.
      I was reading and smiling.
      Just take a deep breath. You will be fine. I know so many people in your situation. The key word is take care of your self. The moment you start paying attention to yourself, and don't allow your happiness come from anybody but yourself.
      Be around people that makes you happy, your siblings, your friends, your neighbours and make sure you avoid discussing him with them so you at least have 2 hours or so to yourself daily.

      Delete
    2. Oh dear!

      Delete
  2. Chai,you hate this man oooo

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. She really hate him at this point. Poster I think it’s better you walk away

      Fan Emmanuel

      Delete
    2. Poster you need to leave that man and move on with your life or else the children you’re using as your excuse to stay will be left without care. You kill him, you go to jail for life and the kids will still blame you when they grow up especially if their lives don’t turn out good.

      Delete
    3. Poster the hate you have for ya Horseband ehe

      Kaiii I dnt even know how to explain it oooo
      Just look for something to do
      Save make you walker ooo
      The hate is too Excess oo
      Jesus Christ
      It is well with you ooo..

      Hello iya boys

      Delete
    4. The man knows it. Unfortunately, that is what the man is knowingly or unknowingly exacting on his own children. Some women weaponise what the man is doing to their benefit by presenting it only that their father hate them. Meanwhile, the real issue is that both husband and wife failed in their marriage.

      Delete
  3. Don't commit murder oooo, because this write up be as e get

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I wont lie, i really enjoyed the way you write. pouring out your mind point blank.
      You seem to be a smart person, but what made you to marry him without checking red flags?
      My immediate advise is that you develop tough skin and devise a strategy to ignore the things you cannot change (him) and work on the things you can change (you). I mean your pro-actives and reactions. Do not allow him to cause you depression. Use Cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT). read about it.
      In future, you can decide to still separate or divorce form him if it becomes necessary and possible.
      Good luck and remember to advise single female BVs so they can learn from your mistake.

      Delete
    2. She has already killed him in her head

      Delete
  4. Hmmm try and get a job then become stable since you had job before now you will still get, put yourself first do not hold back because of the kids they will be fine and won’t be surprised if they don’t like their dad so they will be fine,so get a job even if it is remotely build yourself quietly if he decides to give you money for business collect it and keep,gather enough physical evidence of his bad behavior but plot your exit file for divorce then distribute evidence of his bad behavior among close circle,leave and do not look back cause it’s seems you might do something irrational.

    ReplyDelete
  5. O boooooy, I follow u shout ahhh! What in God's name is this. Poster sorry o.

    ReplyDelete
  6. What!!!this is not a marriage,you hate your husband so much and it's already driving you crazy.
    There is alot of comparison going on too and this will never make you see the good side of your hisband.
    please you need to step out for a while and take a deep fresh air before you commit murder ooo.

    You also need to speak out to your family members,his own siblings,a counselor,honestly you need help.

    You are staying because he is a provider,the resentment is too much.

    I can't deal in this kind of environment.

    ReplyDelete
  7. Sorry my sister, worst happened to me and he slaps and beats me in their family house and nobody says anything. Because they want to be in his good book for financial favour and visa abroad. But I thank God I left after 2yrs plus of been with a toxic, wicked, lying, shameless ,insulting woman beater etc

    ReplyDelete
  8. Poster,is it because you not financially stable you are still there?you really hate this man and if time is not taken someone might get hurt,why not separate for now,better still go for counseling you both

    The laughing like hyena got meπŸ˜‚,na wao

    ReplyDelete
  9. Ah this chronicle is so long! But didn't you see all these red flag. Before marriage? Before you wake up one day and kill somebody's son , please walk away o. Get a job , and double your hustle so you won't depend on him entirely. This bitterness and resentment is too much for somebody you are living with.

    ReplyDelete
  10. May God help you, I will only give you one advice, forgive yourself for the mistake you think you made by marrying him, and I know this is not easy, ignore him, do not give him that power to rile you up again.

    Lastly, pray that God should fill your mind with his peace.

    ReplyDelete
  11. I'm even scared for him..
    The level of ur hatred for is bad.. U need to get a job, even if it's a teaching job that takes out of that place for at least 5 hours a day..

    So u have something else u think of apart from how much u hate ur husband..

    U have married him for 11years, yet no changes.. He will never change, so just look for something else that gives u peace, try and stay away from him always.. Stop nagging, begging, talking, complaining, caring,just make him feel invincible.. He may want to change for better..

    ReplyDelete
  12. This is too much hatred for the father of your kids. You are too embittered. God forbid your type in my lineage. 🀨🀨🀨

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Exactly!!!.


      She is as toxic as the man she described above. If not more sef. I kept shuddering while reading through.


      Abeg, Stella give the man the right of reply, if possible. Let see what he have to say about this heap of allegations.

      Delete
    2. Even an enemy can not be hated this way. This is too much. Madam leave that man before you kill him and end up in jail. I even wonder how he stays with you. No aura of peace in your home at all. May be you open up to him, and separate or divorce completely. The words used in this post are heavy, how do you now relate at home.

      Delete
    3. Like, I actually feel bad for the man. So much hatred.

      Delete
    4. Too embittered, you say? I hope you can accept in peace all she said. The disrespect to her and their children and other things, can you accommodate that?

      Delete
    5. Thank you. While I sympathize with her, I feel she is controlling.
      She may have even tried to cut him off from his family and it didn’t work.
      The way she abused and called him unprintable names is disturbing.
      Since you despise this man this much, I think you should leave that marriage.
      Baltika, did anyone tie her down there? If the man is all that, why can’t she go back to her family?
      Poster, how many kids do you have?

      Sluttychic.

      Delete
    6. You people are talking like this because you have never experienced real narcissists! I was married to one, and this was how I used to describe my feelings about him to my mom. He is also the last born. Poster, I know how you feel but for your sanity, you need to channel your energy to your kids. Don't let your hatred of him consume you. I am a much happier person since leaving my marriage. I wish you the best.

      Delete
    7. Dear poster, before I given my epistle-like advice, I just want to ask you one question.
      For 11years you have been this bitter, what then was the attraction to get married to him in the first place?

      Delete
  13. Poster,this ur write up just made me feel so sad and angry at d same time.pls don't let ur hate cause u to commit murder oh!!! Work on urself and forget him.i believe u really hate him and ur blinded by it.in d sense dat Notting he does will be good in ur eyes.pls try and turn away from this hate.so u can love ur kids more and pls love urself by working on urself.

    ReplyDelete
  14. OMG!!! 😰😰😰

    OP, get hold of yourself. In fact, get help. You're not mentally stable. I know you're going through so much struggles and that has left you handling so many emotional dynamics at a time but still you need to get hold of yourself. Reading through your chronicle says a lot about you as well. You're not in any way better than your husband. Two peas in a pod!!!
    You wrote that your man is a foolish man and whatnot, just to express your anger. But aunty, who is the foolish man's wife?? YOU, my dear. Mind your words. I understand your anger, but don't be irrational.

    What exactly do you want advise on?? Because from your chronicle, you're not ready to leave. Why continue to live in toxicity though?? Look at you, you're an emotional mess. Why don't you take a break or just leave the toxic environment totally??

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Nice pointer Omo B. She is no different. The insult on the father of her children is not right. Aaaah

      Delete
  15. Ewoo this one truly choke Chai madam is it not better to go and live in a one room apartment than this hell? Get a job fast and leave before one of you kills.

    ReplyDelete
  16. Poster you need to take care of your mental health. If not for yourself do it for your children. Have you tried talking to him?or you can talk to an elderly person not a family member that he respects (perhaps a religious leader) neutral to you both.
    You can separate temporarily and see if that changes anything. If the marriage cannot be salvaged then you should get a divorce (you can start from the scratch, there no place to go asides going up when you have reached rock bottom). This is way better than killing your spouse (you're already having these thoughts). Get help ASAP.

    ReplyDelete
  17. I am laughing and crying at the same time.

    ReplyDelete
  18. You obviously resent this man! I applaud you for your graphic description and attention to detail unfortunately it's negative...I believe your hands are not very busy hence the degrading description of your husband...Why not focus on getting a job and make yourself feel better....You harbour a very bitter spirit and it will do no good to your soul, spirit and body...

    You said you don't have funds if not I would said travel to a place that you can cool off for a least 1 week or if your church is organizing any camp activities, just go alone to cool off and seek a matured person to discuss how you feel...Your soul is crying for help and it needs to be saved.

    Rather than occupying your mind and dedicating 24hr/7days mentioning the 1000 ways you hate your husband thereby giving the devil more room to make you unalive your husband, how about speaking to a counseller or therapist that would help purge out this hurt...

    Trust me you can't love your kids or focus on positive things with this mindset....Look for a mature person that your husband has high regard or respect for to intervene...You mentioned that his father and older sisters are well behaved abi? If he respects them, why not channel your complaints to them and do so in a respectful manner....So you can resolve this amicably....

    Harboring too much bitterness will affect your healthwise and you will look so old and haggard...Focus on making sure you are sane....Your husband will go on and inform he will not feel any iota of hatred you have towards him so why waste your energy?

    Work on yourself to be better for your kids and YOU...

    All the best

    ReplyDelete
  19. Chai I can feel the hate from here.
    Poster, didn't you see the red flag when you both were dating because I'm sure this his character didn't just resurrect,e dey him body tey tey.
    Please just try and control your emotions and don't let hatred push you to commit murder.

    I had an acquaintance that hated her hubby because of his cheating ways. One day she confided in me that whenever her hubby is sleeping she always has the urge to stab him. I told her that if it has reached like this, she better take a walk o before she commits murder. Today shes separated from the hubby and she's happy.

    ReplyDelete
  20. Before you kill somebody's son, just leave him, you have children to take care of, please talk to your parents.

    ReplyDelete
  21. I wish God would open his spiritual eyes to see how you hate him, then take necessary actions to protect himself and kids.

    ReplyDelete
  22. Ha! Your hatred for this man is too much. Try and find something doing that will take you away from the house.

    ReplyDelete
  23. Poster I really pray you get a job soon. Not many will understand what you are going through but I lived with an older cuz' that was trapped in a marriage like yours how she's maintained her sanity so far beats me.May God intervene somehow.Amen

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Really not many will understand what poster is going through for her to harbor this kind of hatred for her husband.

      I recently noticed that I harbor some resentment against my husband because he has treated me quite unkindly in some ways, meanwhile he is very kind to outsiders, na that one dey scatter head pass. Our disagreements are beginning to be toxic, I have to ask God to help me forgive him and clear my heart because I don’t want to bring children up in toxicity. I want to learn to just ignore him and mostly be on my own.

      My marriage is only 2 years. I can imagine poster’s 10 years of hurt and resentment. Ah! Poster sorry. Please take it easy. Ask God to help clear your heart of hurt. It’s a prayer you need to say everyday. Ignore him but stand your ground when it concerns you and your kids. Find a life for yourself outside your husband and kids. Think of the best way to collect money from him and start a business outside the home so you can see other things that bring you joy.
      May God help us.

      Delete
  24. This one is pure hatred for your hubby and you may harm him if you don't control it.......At this point even if the man changes for good,you will not notice because of the level of your hate.Get something doing ASAP and pray for a change of mind towards your hubby.

    ReplyDelete
  25. Poster begin to pray about EVERYTHING you just complained about. The same God you mentioned that brings you out of depression Will answer you.

    ReplyDelete
  26. You are very resentful...I feel sorry for your husband, I bet he doesn't know what's coming to him...leave him before you commit murder..money or not, pls leave!

    ReplyDelete
  27. You never told us how and why you married him maybe he was giving you money and that blinded your reasoning now that it has dried up you are here lamenting I hated it when women don't see any good I their spouse yet opened their LeGs to collect children?madam you are only seeking for symphathy,am not one of them ,if all you said are true ,divorce him let another take your place and lastly do something about your joblessness .It is turning you into talebearer

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Some women are attracted to pushover or push-about men (the Biblical King Ahab kind of men). The women usually expect to always push the men over or about in the marriage. Trouble starts when the man refuses to be pushed-about in the marriage, but continues to allow himself being pushed-about outside the marriage to the wife's knowledge.

      The man presents as a push-about by his family members. But he apparently does not want to be pushed that way at home. It appears that is where the resentment started from.

      Delete
  28. Oh my goodness!! Poster you know what. I think you should first leave that house and go and stay in your mother's house for sometimes, from there you can get a good job and stand on your own. You can go and be visiting your kids from time to time till you can go and claim them later because I don't think your children should even grow with such a man. Oh my goodness!!

    ReplyDelete
  29. Men..listen and listen carefully, this is what you get when you push a woman to breaking point. They may not say a word, maybe too tired to argue, but rest assured the woman is planning your demise carefully. Women may be weaker physi ally but what they lack in physical strength they make up in emotional intelligence. They are highly manipulative creatures...watch your back when your home becomes this toxic!

    ReplyDelete
  30. God abeg o.
    Abeg no vex na short man,
    Fat with big stomach.
    Na there characteristics be that.
    Very dull .

    ReplyDelete
  31. At least writing this probably helped you feel better

    ReplyDelete
  32. I can smell The hatred from here.
    God abegg oo.🚢🏼‍♀️

    ReplyDelete
  33. Poster please take it easy. Your are hurting so bad and the hate is showing in your chronicle. Don't allow the hate to consume you.
    May God heal your heart and give you peace.

    ReplyDelete
  34. I understand your anger and where you are coming from. It's someone who has not been in your shoes that would insult you. I know how much the way he treats you can affect your mental health and also the children’s own.

    Please and please your resentment will only hurt your mental health further . Please for your own good seek help.
    Get a job no matter how small. Get out of the house. Seek happiness outside of him. Also it only christ Jesus that can fill this void you are feeling, help you to forgive and move on from him.

    Hugs to you and I pray you experience peace that christ can give.

    Hugs and love you are in my prayers.

    ReplyDelete
  35. We sell genuine and affordable land2 July 2024 at 16:59

    Please focus on his good sides and endure. Everyone has their good areas that you can cope with. Last born are like that because them no follow anyone for back. They are very proud and arrogant. May God help you

    ReplyDelete
  36. Bitch you are the problem.
    You have just exposed yourself, cho cho cho woman.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Who is this dimwit?

      Delete
    2. No mind am, lazy unproductive fool, she just dey there dey monitor man, go and get a life mugu woman so another woman who knows how to bring positive impact can come in, wicked woman. You go cry tire until you leave that house, imagine being angry he runs errands for his siblings but if they run errand for him you will like it, monitoring spirit. Witch

      Delete
  37. is too much
    you could kill this man someday.

    ReplyDelete
  38. This is sad..couldn't even read to the end.
    Madam please if there's somewhere you can go for a while, please do..
    This feeling you have towards your husband is unhealthy.. go get some fresh hair before you do something drastic.

    ReplyDelete
  39. How can a woman hate her husband like this, kai..but that guy is a disgrace to us last born.

    ReplyDelete
  40. You so much hate this man, I hope you don't killed him one day or poison him one day.
    Pls if you are tired pls run away, your children will survive with you or without you. Pls

    ReplyDelete
  41. Wow, i didn't know that this blog still dey o. I just say make i check today. Nice

    ReplyDelete
  42. I sincerely Pray that
    1)God should give You Peace that Surpasses all Understanding. You are resentful towards your Husband and For the Mean time,there is nothing He can do to Change or see the tiniest good in him.
    2)Get yourself a Trainer, Take long walks Early in the Mornings and Early in the Evenings,Breathe in And out,Listen to Your Favourite songs or teachings through your Phone ( ear piece or head phone)
    3) You need a Break from Your Home,Go and Visit your Mom,during the Weekend.
    Start Submitting Your Resumes, You need a Job,You need to earn Money,You need to find Yourself.
    For the Love of God,Do not Turn into someone that Even your Beloved Children will end up despising.
    Guess What,You will gradually extend this Anger for your Husband to your Children.
    I wish You the Very Best!!!!

    ReplyDelete
  43. What is this? I couldn't even read half way through.
    All these insults?

    I can't even talk.

    God Abeg!!

    Save me from any marriage of this form.

    ....





    Hydrogen

    ReplyDelete
  44. This hate is deep. You need to walk away from that marriage because you kee this man unprovoked

    ReplyDelete
  45. My dear,It takes the grace of God for a person to remain sane in a marriage.Thats why it's important we build our home with the word of God.The devil knows how beautiful marriage is and will never stop troubling it inorder to destroy people and get more candidates to hell.
    Every marriage has its own challenge.Even if you leave this marriage, you will find a different one with some one else.
    I urge you to create more room for communication and let God re-create your home,if you allow him.

    ReplyDelete
  46. Ahnn ahnn
    This one choke truly truly,. While reading through i could feel the pain, hatred and regrets. Poster, permit me to say that you caused this for yourself, you saw these signs while courting but you ignored them, maybe with the thought that he will change which never or rarely happens. People don't change like that.
    I pray you God gives you a good paying job that will occupy your mind and keep you busy, also the Grace to stay strong, you really do need that Grace if not from your tune you fit kill person pikin ohh.
    It is well with you.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. She seems like the type of woman that sneers at people, foolish woman that cannot live her life but spends time monitoring a man.

      Delete
  47. Madam so much hate towards this man. Some of your points are valid, but other are like excuses you use just to continue to hate. Aren't there some things you like about him. Do the children like him too or other family members or friends. It not greener outside. Please you need to tell us if you perfect too. Please take it easy on yourself and pray about it.

    ReplyDelete
  48. I am beyond 40 and I love animated movies and my beloved Muppets. I don’t think I could handle anyone trying to change me or get me to ‘grow up’.

    You have no respect for your husband and that to me is worst that not loving him. Yes, you can leave, no matter how bad you think things are, you can always leave. You knew he was annoying and a bit much but you married him for the security, now that you have the security you cannot escape his ugly side. Please go get a job and build up yourself so that you don’t have to stay and suffer and silently hate a man that you committed to love. Marrying someone for money is just an elevated form of runs. Please stop this bullshit and go seek, knock and ask to see how you can escape. You used to work for an NGO then go find one for abused women and use them to help yourself. These places are often funded and have funds and access to resources. And they have connections to partners that can help. You are too dependent and that is why he can treat you like garbage. The moment you find a means of financially supporting yourself he will change. You must build up financially and try to save a few kobos from the money you use to run the household. It is never good for a woman to be without her own money no matter what level she is married at. I do not know what led to you being financially dry but you need to fix it and not wait for your husband to set you up in any business. Get a job with a company that you can have a pension and benefits. If you stay there depending on him he may strike you a vindictive blow from the grave and will everything to those he put above you and the children. You do not take chances with a man like that, they will screw you over even from the grave. Keep sitting waiting for manna to fall and don’t get up and go seek.

    Always marry someone you like being around, even when the life is tested the friendship you have and like being around them will carry you through. Good luck!

    ReplyDelete
  49. Angel Poster, The way you nailed this Man while absolving yourself of any wrong doing is a big write off for Me. You mean the whole family bukata is on just one person ? Will advice you get something doing and with immediate effect too. Get busy !!!
    An idle mind is the devil's ... don't give in !

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  50. Poster, go to your sisters-in-law to find out what they do that makes their husbands to treat them as Queens, and to treat their children as princes/princesses. It is very obvious that your SILs treat their husbands better than they treat their brother (your husband). So they are not really good as you present them.

    By the way, there is no difference between a cartoon and a televised Formula 1 motor racing sport for the typical Nigerian man. You would be surprised some Nigerian men are ardent F1 sport fans and they watch it. A man may even learn more from some cartoons than the typical Nigerian film or movie. But once we h8te a person even the way he hold his spoon to eat may irritate us.

    Find some small respect for your husband. Forget about love for now.

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  51. You sound so bitter and frustrated with the situation. I feel so sad for you. I pray you get a job so you will take your mind off things. I wish you all the best

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  52. You are so bitter towards this husband of a man. Why not take a break from the house even if it is a week. But please pray that God gives you peace, job and grace to forgive yourself and your husband.

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  53. Please find peace in your heart πŸ’–, no marriage is perfect but you can't stay like this. Most of the comments that condemes you can't stand for a day in your shoes. Some would have committed suicide or murder but you are strong and patiently tolerate him for 11 years. You vented all your heart out and it is good because it gives you closure. You are a good woman to have endured all these for 11 years. Now a time for your rebirth, try to raise up some funds to help you start a business. Don't ask him for help, no rooms for his fuck up again. Be a busy serious woman with a lot of prospects, start online sales, set up things that distract you from him. Let him know you are not happy and give him room to ask you for amendment. If he continues with his disrespectful attitude. Time to be serious for separation to avoid further complications in your life. Your peace of mind is everything you have, guide it with your life.

    Boost media

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