Sunday, October 05, 2025
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Amen o
ReplyDeleteAmen
ReplyDeleteAmen 🙏🙏
ReplyDeleteAmen
ReplyDeleteAmen
ReplyDeleteAmin ya Allah 🤲🤲
ReplyDeleteAmen and amen
ReplyDeleteAMEN 🙏
ReplyDeleteI’m the chronicle poster of 1st Oct.
ReplyDeleteI thank everyone for their wise counsel.
A lot of people mentioned he just wants to Nack and move on.
I honestly don’t think this is the case here. The agreement to a no sex arrangement was actually a very mutual decision, not just from me, it was also his idea. Sex is not really an issue for him as he very well to do and in position of power. Women throw themselves at him a lot and some even hope to tie him down with pregnancy and what not, so if he wanted sex every day he would get it at no cost. But we took this decision because we were very intentional about what we wanted from each other from the beginning. He also already has the number of kids he wants and so is also very wary of sex because of pregnancy …and stds.
We clicked because I believe he also lacked emotional intimacy with his wife just like I did so it was a major factor that brought us together. He actually feels sex is overrated and said he has never had sex with a married woman and would never do it even with me. Like I mentioned earlier he has never ever tried to initiate or coerce me into intimacy with him like most Nigerian men would have attempted by now and we’ve been together over 3yrs now. The few times we made out I initiated it and he was the one that eventually stopped us. I later realized I was ovulating (reason I was overly touchy) now he jokingly asks me to check with my calendar before we schedule to meet up anytime.
He does struggles with his sexual urge like any healthy man would, we talk about it openly and find other ways for him to relieve the pressure which he has been managing well so far.
What we share is really beyond sex and I feel we were able to reach this level of emotional intimacy because we put off sex and invested more in getting to know each other better. There’s absolutely nothing we don’t share with each other. We have a zero judgment space for each other and are able to truly be our most true self around each other,
something we both don’t have with our partners.
Having him in my life is a special kind of experience for me, something I yearned for pleaded for, for over 10yrs in my marriage and never got.
Few years ago I would have judged anyone in similar situation but life has taught me otherwise. So I don’t even feel bad reading the “judgemental” comments condemning my actions, that used to be me too.
In finding my side Boo, it feels like I found a piece that completed my life.
He is an absolutely kind soul with a loving heart, gentle to the core and very empathetic. I do not know anyone else in the life like him.
He knows me more than anyone in this life and loves me selflessly. When I fell sick and was hospitalized last year, he was there 24/7, never left my side for a minute, I ended up not informing my family as he took absolute control and made sure I got the best care and treatment possible. The nurses and doctors all assumed he was husband and constantly told me I was very lucky to have such a kind hearted and present man.
I know if I agree to be with him he would be a great partner but I can’t do it now especially as our kids are still young. I would hate to be the reason his kids would grow up without him actively being in their lives.
I finally had a discussion with him this weekend and told him I can’t leave my marriage for him. It would be too messy for both families and I don’t have that tough heart to hurt people like this. Guilt would kill me.
I’ve begged him to leave things as they are. We r both happy.
But if not. I’m happy to let him go. He was very upset and shed tears.
I understand the underlying challenges he’s facing which was what propelled him to propose, something I’m not at liberty to share here.
We still talk every day and I hope things are able to get back to normal soon.
Maybe sometime in the future. fate may work out a way for us to be together for good.
Thank you all for your advice.
Madam 22: 18..I think you are better being a divorcee, than that nonsense you are entangled in. I have been married for 14 years as a woman, you have to be intentional in your marriage. Can you pray your son is treated like this, by his future wife? the way you are to your husband. Don't be with your husband by force, because clearly, your eyes are on another man. Save yourself long epistles and deliberate drama. Do you have the fear of God at all? You are justifying nonsense, making it look trivial. You made vows before God on your wedding day...so what's all of these? You are annoying me, but I wish you well going forward...if you have sons, just remember your ways..don't....
DeleteAmen
ReplyDeleteAmen
ReplyDeleteAmen 🙏
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