Is this life?Hmmmmmm!!!
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I recently met with a long time friend. This guy stays in his father's house but the father stays somewhere else( i.e, the man stays somewhere like Ago palace and he stays at Isolo. just using this as an example). The father owns the building at Ago palace and also the one at Isolo.
When we met, I asked him why he wasn't staying at that house at isolo again(Being a long time good pal). he opened up to me in tears because I know his wife and know almost everything about him.
He already had two children before I got married. We are always together. He is among the best igbo guy I so much love to be with(very simple, truthful and considerate). We began to go deep into the discussion but the worse I heard was.
"Bisi, believe me or not, I caught my dad on my wife life and direct".
I was confused. I asked if he was just trying to paint issue for me. He cursed himself with a lot if he ever lied against his father. I don't want to go deep in this for some reasons best known to me.
I realized from his words that, he is a strong man for seeing such and not doing anything to both of them except sending his wife away and moving out of the house. He works with his dad in same place(they sell hmmmm). But he stopped going and got a driving job in a secondary school close to where he got a room self contained to stay in with his three children.
Now, who is at fault at this point? The wife or the father? This is so disheartening and provocative. Why will a woman do such? What kinda poverty would have led that woman to such thing? This is why I preach contentment in here all the time. And to the guy's father... Infact, I'm short of words and don't know what to say about such a devilish man.
I realized from his words that, he is a strong man for seeing such and not doing anything to both of them except sending his wife away and moving out of the house. He works with his dad in same place(they sell hmmmm). But he stopped going and got a driving job in a secondary school close to where he got a room self contained to stay in with his three children.
Now, who is at fault at this point? The wife or the father? This is so disheartening and provocative. Why will a woman do such? What kinda poverty would have led that woman to such thing? This is why I preach contentment in here all the time. And to the guy's father... Infact, I'm short of words and don't know what to say about such a devilish man.
The man presently had an accident last week of December 2025 and his two legs have been amputated.... He said, he didn't even act as if he heard. His elder ones called and wanted to know why he is ignoring his father but he never said anything to them than. "I don't want to see him". I think the elder ones also asked their father but he couldn't tell them the reason for his son's action.
I cried. As in, when he was narrating how he caught them. I was so emotional. The father deceived him by asking him to go to shop early because some customers are coming. But he got there but till 2pm, he had no sales then didn't bother calling his father to tell him he is closing the shop(since they stay separately).
I cried. As in, when he was narrating how he caught them. I was so emotional. The father deceived him by asking him to go to shop early because some customers are coming. But he got there but till 2pm, he had no sales then didn't bother calling his father to tell him he is closing the shop(since they stay separately).
Then baba closed up the shop and went back home only to find his father on his wife. What a taboo. Imagine the distance of the shop to his place(like ojuelegba to ikorodu), normally he closes by 6pm but that day was so different.
This is heartbreaking and too much for him to bear. I felt his heart beat but had nothing to tell him. I only advised him to focus on his children and God will give him a breakthrough.
This is heartbreaking and too much for him to bear. I felt his heart beat but had nothing to tell him. I only advised him to focus on his children and God will give him a breakthrough.
He can focus on his children and forgive his Father and embrace him again..He can also forgive his wife and allow her access to the kids....He is hurting and his anger will cause him more harm than good....He has refused to tell anyone else except you(?) about it meaning he still cares....let him forgive and move on please....The kids need their mum no matter how bad she is...
Ah ahn? Did he mention he name anywhere again?
ReplyDeleteThe man can forgive his dad and wife from afar and still let them go. You dont have to drink the whole sea to know it is salty. Those two could have killed him, they are that evil. I used to know a very rich man who thought nothing of sleeping with his siblings wives. One was even a new bride of only one week. They all kept "forgiving" because he was rich. He died a long time ago and his legacy and riches are all gone with his children still fighting over his remaining properties. Such abominable acts always devastate those affected and leave a trail of destruction.
ReplyDeleteThis is a devastating situation, and the raw human behaviour at play is painfully clear. Your friend is caught between betrayal, familial obligation, and personal survival. The shock of discovering infidelity involving both his spouse and his father cuts at the core of trust, identity, and security. His anger is naturally a protective mechanism against being emotionally shattered.
ReplyDeleteMentally, what he is experiencing is a mix of grief, moral outrage, and inner turmoil. He is trying to reconcile the image of his father as a caretaker with the reality of a profound violation. Similarly, he is shockingly forced to negotiate the paradox of his love for his children versus his hurt and resentment toward their mother. These conflicts are intense because they involve both attachment and betrayal, the very elements that structure human relationships.
I would suggest he practices containment and focus, even if it feels impossible at first. He cannot undo the betrayal or erase the images, but he can control how it shapes his life. Prioritising his children’s emotional stability, setting firm boundaries, and seeking support to process his trauma and anger will safeguard both his well-being and theirs. Forgiveness is not excusing the wrong - it is reclaiming control over his life and emotions.
At the same time, he must accept that some relational ruptures may remain unresolved. Full reconciliation may not be possible or wise, but strategic emotional separation - loving his children, setting limits on the adults involved, and reclaiming personal dignity - is the most human, grounded response at this level.
Pain does not absolve him of self-preservation. In situations like this, practical love and protective clarity are stronger than blind loyalty or reactive rage.
All this epistle on top someone's story. Which one we go read? Na wah
DeleteNa wah ooh things are really happening 😔
ReplyDeleteHmmm.... God forbid.
ReplyDeleteMay God help the guy and have mercy on the father and wife. This is not something he should hide. He needs to let all his mother, siblings and in-laws know what he is keeping away before his father and ex makes an Uriah out of him .
People that wicked will turn the story on him tomorrow despite the pain and anger of betrayal eating away at him . He should not cover a sin that can consume him o!!!
Who's at fault? The 2 parties who voluntarily affronted God with such a heinous act.
ReplyDeleteHe needs to let both families know, then insist the father sponsor ALL the children for DNA testing for the sake of those children's future and for him to allow his father bond with any children Grandpa made with his wife before passing on.
The father is really devilish. How could he sleep with his son's wife? Shamelessness at it's peak
ReplyDeleteStella where my comment nii
ReplyDeleteThat pain he is feeling can’t be easy to bear. May God unburden his heart and grant him peace.
ReplyDeleteIt is so important for all humans to work on their flaws and immoralities, because if they don’t it will surely catch up with them in the worst way. All the women in the world to frolick with and it’s his son’s wife that he chooses. There is something demonic happening to men who are in their 50s and 60s, so many stories of abominations coming out of that age group, even with those who are highly accomplished and educated. I honestly do not know what is happening to men in that age group these days. Be a monitoring spirit if you have a loved one with a lot of free time on their hands in that age group, be the stumbling block in their path to self destructive behaviour.
As for the wife, of all the ways to taint yourself, accepting to be penetrated by both a father and son, that’s a low no woman should ever consciously choose to go for nothing on this earth. No money is so good and no obstacle so great that it is worth being penetrated by generations of the males of a family group to get. There are sins and then there are abominations. Learn the difference!
It’s easy to tell a man to forgive and move on, but when he catches his wife in bed with his own father, forgiveness is not something that comes lightly. That level of betrayal cuts deep and shakes the very foundation of trust and family.
ReplyDeleteAt this point, a DNA test is strongly advisable. When there’s serious doubt, it’s better to rely on verified facts rather than assumptions.
If his father is the father of his children the dna test will probably not be able to detect it.
DeleteAbomination!!
ReplyDelete