SERIOUS ADVICE NEEDED
Good Day Stella, please help me post this on your platform, I need advice.
I am a single mother of one. I was having accommodation issues last year, and my elder sister decided that I should come and stay with them until I am able to sort myself out, for which I am grateful to her.
Around June this year, her husband started disturbing me to come and work in his shop (no salary involved), and I declined because he is someone who normally has issues with people who work for him, as he is manipulative and has trust issues.
My refusal to work for him has created problems between me and my sister because she adores her husband, and he can never go wrong in her eyes. She started giving me attitude and saying hurtful things to me, and she asked me to leave their house.
I have been supporting her in managing her home ever since I came. Eighty percent of the house chores are done by me, including school runs, but my refusal to work for her husband has made her see me as a bad person.
I have been supporting her in managing her home ever since I came. Eighty percent of the house chores are done by me, including school runs, but my refusal to work for her husband has made her see me as a bad person.
The whole issue turned me into a different version of myself; I lost my peace of mind and sanity, became restless, and lost weight.
I was able to save a little money and have rented a small apartment, which I moved into recently. I have not stayed up to a week here, and I hardly sleep at night.
I was able to save a little money and have rented a small apartment, which I moved into recently. I have not stayed up to a week here, and I hardly sleep at night.
I have been having terrible dreams of someone trying to barge into the apartment forcefully, and I keep hearing strange voices in the environment as if it is haunted.
At this point, I do not even know what to do. I do not know if I should accept my sister’s husband’s request because I have tried reaching the landlord for a refund, and he is not answering.
Please, I want advice on how to navigate this issue. Thank you.
At this point, I do not even know what to do. I do not know if I should accept my sister’s husband’s request because I have tried reaching the landlord for a refund, and he is not answering.
Please, I want advice on how to navigate this issue. Thank you.
Reach Landlord for refund how? You must be dreaming cos no Landlord will ever refund.
Secondly, going back may not be a good idea oooooh...They were already using you like a slave and you refused more work...The man can say you stole his money or your sister can say that you came back to snatch her husband....You should have planned your exit very well knowing you had nowhere else to go....
You may have moved into a haunted house and that is why the Landlord is not answering your calls....I lack advice at this stage cos stubborn me will never go back to that situation you described but i guess you have no choice but have to return?If you think where you are is really scary and have no choice but to run out and you will not mind the insult you will get at your sisters place now, then call her and ask that she allows you return.
Bear in mind that she might say No.
Hello sweetie,
ReplyDeleteFirst, I must say you got it wrong by not helping your in-law in his shop. I know you would have accepted the offer if there was a pay attached to it. This is where sacrifice comes into play. You wouldn't have worked for him forever. At least you should have gotten started and worked for a few months while planning your exit. This would have helped you not to be in a hurry and land where you are now.
Do you know if you would have met people while working for your in-law and gotten better life connections? One mistake we humans usually make is that we don't want to undergo the process. What if you had worked for him and along the line politely requested for him to be giving you something little for upkeep? Would he be that heartless not to do so? For someone to accommodate you and by extension feed you, honey, it's not an easy feat. You should have reciprocated that gesture at least for a few months, so that when the matter is being discussed, it will be fair on your own side when you say you helped out for some period of months doing that. Honestly, it's not easy accommodating a grown-up person.
The deed has been done and you are now left at a crossroad. But let me ask, now you're staying alone, what are you currently doing? Secondly, are you sure it's not your mind playing a trick on you? Understandably, there are houses that are haunted and if that's the case, and you feel your landlord could be some sort of a fetish person, how about calling for vigil prayers from your local church in your house? If truly the house is haunted and your landlord is involved in it, he would be the one begging you to pack. He will refund you the rent you paid. He wouldn't want you to spoil his peace or whatever. If you're a Christian, try organising a weekly prayer vigil in your house and look out for your landlord's reaction. There's nothing prayer cannot do or expose.
I hope this helps.
©️ TEEJAY
TEEJAY, you are very wise. All things you wrote up there really makes sense. Poster, can't you pray? Don't rely on anyone in this life except God.
DeleteTJ, I pray God blesses you with your own wife. You are a calm man and you deserve a wonderful woman.
She knows the man and she she has said why she didn’t go work for him. Why are you so sure you know better
DeleteWhat if accuses her of theft
Amen to your prayers @ WINNER, YES I AM!
DeleteI'm humbled by your kind compliment. God bless you.
©️ TEEJAY
Poster no matter what you do not go back there. The disrespect will be promax.
ReplyDeleteDid she ask you to help in addition to helping out at home?. If you were in the shop would you be cooking? Would you be doing childcare?.
ReplyDeleteYou dey person house free of charge chop food free with your child and you refuse helping?? . Not nice.
I would understand if you said you had to go out to look for job and they were tying you down. But would you rather stay home like a princess and eat than helping out in the home?? You’re helping out and counting it for her. Shebi you’ve moved out. Try taking two mouths to feed let’s see how far.
Do not accept his request. What kind of stingy person is that, he wants you to work for free when you have a child to take care of.
ReplyDeleteDear,
DeleteIn my lowest, trying to find my feet, if someone can offer me an accommodation and feeding when I can't provide it for myself, on the condition that I help them in their business without being paid, I will gladly accept it. It's not a lifetime contract. While I'm at it, I'm building connections and planning my next line of action in life. Wisdom is profitable to direct. Everything isn't all about money.
What if, in the process of helping the in-law, she learns the business and decides to start her own? What if her character and way of service attracts a young man that will come to patronise the business and from there, something beautiful starts?
©️ TEEJAY
I honestly think you should consider giving your brother-in-law's offer another chance. Given what you are going through with accommodation, perhaps returning to your sister's home and helping out in the shop could give you and your child some stability while you get back on your feet. Sometimes, we need to put our differences aside and give reconciliation a chance. There is nothing wrong with accepting help or reconsidering a decision. Just make sure you are not putting yourself back into an unhealthy situation.
ReplyDeleteHowever, I would suggest sitting down with both of them first and having an honest conversation. Let everyone understand their expectations, your responsibilities and whether there will be some financial compensation. What matters is that you are treated with respect and that the arrangement works for everyone.
As for the apartment, please don't immediately conclude that it is haunted. Talk to your neighbours, investigate the strange sounds and have the property checked. Your lack of sleep is also something you should take seriously. Ultimately, your peace and your child's well-being are what matter most.
Can you stop with the "Sweetie" for people you don't know; simply because you want to address their chronicles.
ReplyDeleteVery weird
Delete🤣🤣🤣
DeleteWhy are you pained? No, I won't stop. Every chronicle here is special to me and I will address it as such whenever the need arises.
©️ TEEJAY
Say your prayers and go to sleep
ReplyDeleteThere’s no ghost there. You’re just afraid cause there’s no other adult in the house