''When a man pushes you to the wall, talk to a counsellor and please SHUT THE FUCK UP ... Men are angered by words that's why silence is the best way to kill a man (cause he is afraid, he doesn't know what you have up your sleeves) MEN ARE AFRAID OF SILENT WOMEN (SILENT not QUIET - they are different) And if a man is abusive and you can't help it, maybe its time to WALK OUT''.
''Good Morning dear BVs,
say NO to DOMESTIC VIOLENCE. I am not saying PLEASE this time around, this is something we all must say NO from whether we like it or NOT. I am worried at the rate at which domestic violence (emotional, physical and every kind of torture associated with it) has risen in many homes today. When God instituted marriage, he put man and woman there because he didn't want them to be alone and the institution marriage should be based on love not otherwise.
I have never read in my bible that a married man beat his wife or otherwise (maybe because I have not searched the scriptures enough or has anyone read that in their bible?) Even when Saul's daughter mocked David, did he beat her? when Sarah couldn't bear a child for Abraham, did he beat her? I used these examples because men come with stupid excuses for beating their wives "she abused me", "after all these year, no child" so they go ahead and turn their wives to punching bags.
By nature women are the physically weak ones, we need more attention, we are the ones with loud mouths etc, dear men THAT IS HOW WE ARE WIRED ! Just like you are WIRED TO BE MACHO. Never for any reason no matter how good as it sounds abuse your wife whether physically, emotionally, mentally or try to ruin her just because you want to prove a point.
There are ways to pass your message across without being abusive. And for Christ's sake if this woman loves you, if she stood by you why will you suddenly become a beast?
I am a lady, I know women can go overboard sometimes. Please forgive us if we suddenly change. And talking about a woman changing (from good to bad) have you asked yourself why a woman who loved you would suddenly go cold on you and decide to be a "witch" WOMEN CHANGE FOR SO MANY REASONS 1. Maybe you changed 2. Maybe she is mad (cause the devil decides to use her) which ever the case is turn to a good counsellor (God and a physical counsellor, your pastors, an elder you trust or therapy)
Whichever away it is, when it comes to DOMESTIC VIOLENCE, men listen up, IT IS A WOMANS WORLD. i don't think you heard that IT IS A WOMANS WORLD. Yes ! Because the world will support a woman once you have laid your hand on her or her kids.
Talking about kids, are you crazy men ? Your wife offends you and you decide to beat YOUR kids, YOUR kids cause those children are yours, she didn't impregnate herself. What kind of example are you laying for those children. Children learn fast and my mom used to tell me something, 90%of a child's character is shaped by what he sees growing up. Your child beats up his/her mate in school and is suspended, check your home first, that child learnt it from his home.
Man, you probably learnt to be abusive from your family and you pass the same destructive culture to your child and keep destroying generations after you. MAN LEARN ! PLEASE LEARN ! There are too many things I want to write here but .....
DEAR WOMEN, I know you are a woman, you ought to be loved, cherished, pampered and tolerated but do you ever think EVERY MAN has their BREAKING POINT. Like a rubber band that has reached its elastic limit and then they SNAP. Then you cry foul ! May I send this note to women who say their husband cheat on them, if your husband ever cheats CRY, WHINE, SULK, BE COLD BUT NEVER EVER EVER EVER NEVER EVER GO AND BEAT UP ANOTHER WOMAN TO PROVE TO YOUR HUSBAND YOU CAN TREAT HIS FUCK UP ! Are you fucking STUPID ?
Haven't you heard silence kills a man faster than words or blows ? Haven't you heard about soaking them in the blood of JESUS (I am a Christian and I believe in the blood !) Why beat up another woman or confront her (let her dig her grave) You beat her up, your husband beats you up on her behalf and you cry and send SDK touchy stories (This is 2015, women are doing big things now, no woman should be sending touchy stories ... you should be sending stories on achievements to motivate people PLEASE).
When a man pushes you to the wall, talk to a counsellor and please SHUT THE FUCK UP ... Men are angered by words that's why silence is the best way to kill a man (cause he is afraid, he doesn't know what you have up your sleeves) MEN ARE AFRAID OF SILENT WOMEN (SILENT not QUIET - they are different) And if a man is abusive and you can't help it, maybe its time to WALK OUT.
A lot of WOMEN don't understand the reason why court marriages are compulsory, it makes WALKING OUT A LOT EASIER. PLEASE TAKE A HIKE. Don't listen to any pastor who says you should stay because divorce is a sin, murder is a sin too (Whether you kill the man or he kills you, you are still going to sin) BUT DON"T STAY in the marriage and hope he will change like magic. RUN AS FAST AS YOUR LEGS CAN CARRY YOU. Run because YOU NEED YOU, YOUR CHILDREN NEED YOU, YOUR CHILDREN NEED YOU. No woman will mother them like you would, not even your sister.
Let me tell you what happens when he kills you:
1. Your parents and family lament about your death but may probably never be able to do anything about it.
2. Your pastor (the man of GOD who asked you to stay) conducts your funeral
3. Your children may be forcefully taken away by your husband who puts them with another woman and ..... (you know how it goes with another woman)
4. If he doesn't take them, they are left with someone else who may not even give them any attention and then they become a nuisance to the society
5. If God loves you, they would be well taken care of.
Whichever way, please no woman or man should be made to go through hell in the name of being married. SAY NO TO DOMESTIC VIOLENCE.
The world is a global village, speak to people online, facebook, twitter and all and ASK FOR HELP, ASK FOR HELP. DON'T DIE A VICTIM !
Have a good day, be happy, find love where love makes sense, LIVE AND BE HAPPY ! DON"T LET NOBODY ABUSE YOU, don't kill yourself by yourself, DON'T LET THE DEVIL USE YOU.
Thank you Stella, please share this with BVs, if it is going to stop, it starts with us.
Gracie.
FROM FELLOW BV
You said men are afraid of silent women?some women have tried keeping quiet and got more blows for keeping quiet.what is wrong is wrong and a man that abuses will use even your silence to pummel you.....I understand your anger but easy babe!
Gracie ... JESUS WILL FIX IT. i tire for all this.
ReplyDelete#singing: que sera sera
Delete@MEN ARE AFRAID OF SILENT WOMEN--- you nailed it. I fear women who are quiet when you make then angry. They can kill ooo. If you offend a woman and she keeps you quiet, better don't eat her food or sleep in the same room with be before she kills you. Such women are evil. The noisy ones can't hurt a fly.
DeleteI would have faulted this article if you hadn't added that walk away thing. How can a man abuse you and u still stay with the man? Please women, learn to walk away when you're in abusive relationship. Your are better being single with Your kids.
DeleteYour comment will be visible after approval
I hate it wen peeps just generalize! Silence she says... I know of a couple that wen she's silent he gets worse on the premise that she takes him for a mad man that doesn't deserve a response! So miss angry lady, get ur facts straight!
DeleteDo you know the antidote to an abusive man? WALK AWAY. Don't counsel dont do nothing...WALK. He will kill you with his mouth or hands. Nigerian women, divorce has not and will not stop you from going to heaven, but if you die untimely we can't say your portion o. Your children need you. You stay because of the children right. So when the man is beating you, you are hhelping the children how? They are growing up in a 2 parent home. Or 1 parent, 1 beast. Either way, no one can call them children of single parents yet they grow up to become terrors and you, yes you because of your inability to do the right thing will ruin their lives and the lives of those they come across. Kontinue
ReplyDeleteAbsolutely right.
DeleteYes ooooooo, for me too Na walking away oo!!! As in take a very long walk and never look back!!!
DeleteNonsense men everywhere!!!
Any man that strikes a woman has lost control of himself, the situation and risks loosing control of his marriage.
DeleteThe only place I show my power on a woman is in the bed with my joystick. ☺
I know the pains associated with domestic violence cus I experienced it first hand!
DeleteIt wasn't an easy scenario, I finally had to take a walk after over 7years of an abusive marriage.
Walking away wasn't an easy step cus 9ja here,the woman is termed a failure and #teamamebos make life harder.
Worse still is the attitude of family members.
It's not been an easy step but it's been worth it.
Just the scare of being lonely is my prob.
Men are afraid of separated and divorced ladies in 9ja.
Abeg...bvs if u find yourself in an abusive marriage,no die first o.
Life is vital and your kids need u alive to be a good mum to them.
#its well#
Silence was best during d days of Abraham and his likes o! U go silent, d man will silence u.... soaking him inside Jesus blood sef won't be an immediate help cos Jesu Kristi de take time to save d situation after plenty pondering from his end. Any violent man is more of a wild animal. So madam angry, dis ur advice won't work for many. Cos a lot of things are easier said than done.
ReplyDeleteThis ur name sha. Isis?
DeleteYes. Believe it or not. The name ISIS existed long before those SOBs took it.
DeleteBB Annes world thanks for putting dis numbskull through.
DeleteAngry woman indeed!
ReplyDeleteA man should never raise his hands on his wife no matter how angry and pushed he is.
Very well said. Can't fault anything here.
ReplyDeleteMy dear the silence that works on one man may not work on another. For my hubby the more silent u r the more he cheats. He will assune u r a fool so pls everyone do what ur personal chi moves u to do
DeleteI mean just let him be while you run and get help. What is the point when a man is beating you and you keep insulting him during the beating ? He will just kill you. Beg and cry that he should have mercy on you, call on neighbors to help but insulting an already angered man will just help him kill you.
ReplyDeleteThank you for posting, I hope abused women find the strength to shout and get help.
Concerned BV
You are very on point Gracie. Men fear silent women. I offended one of my gfs back in day and she kept quiet, even cleaning my house and preparing food for me. Hmmm fear no let me eat oo, na only me start to dey beg the girl. I started confessing my sins by myself. Fear women that keep quiet after you offend them.
DeleteStella you are right, I have seen a situation where the woman kept quiet and the man even beat her more. The more he ranted and she didn't talk it was like the worse he got sef. A mad man is a mad man and any man who beats his wife is a mad man
ReplyDeleteI mean just let him be while you run and get help. What is the point when a man is beating you and you keep insulting him during the beating ? He will just kill you. Beg and cry that he should have mercy on you, call on neighbors to help but insulting an already angered man will just help him kill you.
ReplyDeleteThank you for posting, I hope abused women find the strength to shout and get help.
Concerned BV
Seriously, beg him to have mercy on you when there was no moral justification for the merciless beating in the first place?
DeleteThe world we live in now is so sad!
ReplyDeleteSilence does little or even worse !! An eye for an eye abeg!
ReplyDeleteNice writeup but silence is not always golden.
ReplyDeleteSome men when you threaten them, they behave.
What works for A may not work for B
The best way forward if you find yourself in such a situation, is to become JonnyWalker!
Just walk away...
Damn what society thinks,
Damn how you gonna cope cos you definitely will.
Just go far away from the abuser and save your life to live for your children.
Cos truly, you stay back and he ends up killing you, the writer has perfectly played out the outcome for you
Ypure so right.
DeleteLaziness and/or fear of the unknown is what glues some women.
Even if you marry a pope, always prepare for the worst and live like there'll never be one. Women can multitask so it's doable.
Igbo people si na ejighi ihe eji agba nti agba n'anya
Threaten a man and he behaves ?? Don't try such with me mehn. It's better for you to carry it out rather than threaten me bcuz once you threaten me, I immediately identify you as an enemy. And I will attack first and break you in pieces before you carry out your threat. It's dangerous to threaten people bcuz you might get a big HIT for the threat.
DeleteI'll threaten u and i'll make good my plans as I open my mouth to. I know ur type. When I make up my mind, m n eme gi m na agwa gi. And u'll be crushed MR ABUSER
DeleteEvanka na story u dey find. Fear go let you ?? Na ur type men dey beat pass sef and them no go do nothing. Na only mouth your type dey get. If them give you one dirty slap now you go blank out. Hahahahaaha. see her mouth
DeleteI have read a chronicle here about a woman who decided to start ignoring her husband when he starts and she still got beaten for not uttering a word!
ReplyDeleteI read a write up by JIB the other day and she said that even the Bible said that a man should love his wife as Christ loved the Church.. Let's note that Christ showed his love for the Church by dying for the Church.. Hence Men should emulate Christ by doing everything to protect his wife and family.
Sadly today we see Christian men even Pastors who ignore this teaching and turn their wives to punching bags.. The annoying thing is that they will never raise their leprous hands in their fellow men but when it's a woman they will start forming macho..
I do support your submission that it is better to be a divorcee than to have your picture on an Obituary announcement.. Please any woman who finds herself in this situation should not be ashamed to speak out and ask for help..Dying in silence has not helped anyone..
Lol...the poster is just angry. May God help marriages of today cos I don't see the solution in sight
ReplyDeleteThe only solution is for single ladies to shine their eyes before marriage, as in wash it with hypo and iron sponge
If u like use vacuum scrubber! If the man wan change him go change walai! Esp if calabar girls wash put for am! Wives shud learn to pray in marriages! And spice their prayers up with fasting sometimes! Cos sm kin juju wey girls dey use for married men dis days! If u no add fasting! If u like pray frm here rich London e fit no wrk! Naa God go help us.
DeleteLol @wash put for am. Wash kini?
DeleteKeeping silent wouldn't help matters at al, it'd rather make the blows and slaps harder... "So I'm talking & ur snobbing me eh?? Kpa kpa kpish on ur head.... Here's what might work "crocodile tears" yeah b4 it gets to the point of physical abuse, start shedding crocodile tears, u can be thinkn of one nigerian film and weep how stupidly they act atimes.... That wld soften his heart abit, am sure it wldnt work for the beasts tho.
ReplyDeleteVery hilarious!!
DeleteI laugh in Swahili.
DeleteMadam poster what's it with the "FUCK" word? That's so unnecessary.
ReplyDeleteThe first sentence annoyed me so I couldn't read the rest.
ReplyDeleteWth is Talk to a Counselor and Stfu?? ?? ?
A man that's abusive is abusive, if you like become dumb and deaf. Some women don't talk and yet they are abused daily whether physically or emotionally.
An abusive person is simply abusive.
Just like on this blog, some female BVs are so abusive it's scary. They are so angry. Female, male, transgender I don't know but some BVs are so angry and abusive. That's how it starts. You can't imagine how they act with their partners.
We ladies should please be very sensitive to your guys reactions when dating. Do not ignore any form of violence o. If he still beats women outside, he will pound you. If he still beats his grown sister, he will pound you. If he easily insults women on the streets or anywhere, you are no different. If he doesn't respect his elder sisters and aunts, he will disrespect you too.
If he is rude to his mother, you will get worse treatment. Don't ever think you are too special. You are not.
Except you are me, of course. Lol.
It's a behavior. No man suddenly learns how to start beating a grown woman just like that. MBA. It's been practiced.
Watch him, watch his reactions when you are watching a movie with him.. WATCH....
Don't be sooo much in love and over look certain things. Hell no.
Some of you female BVs also encourage your stupid brothers to beat up that girl that insulted him or you. Abusive husband is your Karma..
Mothers train your son's better.
Lol@stella's comment. Crazy m'am
ReplyDeleteMadam poster what's it with the "FUCK" word?? Mtcheeew.
ReplyDeleteWhat more can I say?
ReplyDeleteSay NO to domestic violence of any kind!
Mmechakolu oku in this matter is to leave,when you are being abused..
ReplyDeleteAbeg I don tire for this matter..
Most ladies self-esteem are on the down low..
They don't even love themselves..
The chronicles here is enough testament to that fact..
He that has ears,let him hear!
And by the way,why is it always the woman leaving the house for a man?
Should be the other way round afterall a woman has kids to take care of!
Hmmm stellaa ur reply these days are cooler lol. People "shout" so that the world will hear them. The man could use her silence to kill her and walk away just like that. So madam poster I disagree with u on raising alarm! Victims speak out. Some men who indulge in this shameful act need to be disgraced!
ReplyDeleteHey Stella, the poster tired to be as balanced as possible to both sides. So we must commend her.
ReplyDeleteDomestic violence is not something the man should put effort into solving alone. The woman has her role to play. And if she plays her role satisfactorily enough, she is allowed to walk out if things dont improve. as simple as that. Some women know that their bad mouth will earn them a slap and they will go ahead to insult the man. It is like knowing armed robbery is wrong, so you go ahead to argue with a thief holding a gun. STUPID. If you know that if you insult a man that he will slap you, and you are not making any effort to stop insulting him, then be prepared to enjoy the slaps. Men hit women because their words have become less powerful enough to institute a change. If your man is a beast, then it is left for you to intelligently tame him or walk out. Life is simple
People enter into marriage with frozen characteristics that would seem joyful. But one or both partners start deviating and changing, and hence, tension. The point is, people should do what is in their power to solve the problem.
These things are fucking simple
Please i like marriages being held with a glue oh. I dont do divorcees. They are worse thsn single women
I agree with you poster, sadly most abusive husbands learnt from their father...
ReplyDeleteEven a girl once said it's better for her to marry someone that beats her than marry a quiet man; that it shows whose in control,
In my head was thinking this girl never see correct beating....SMH
That girl has been so psychologically damaged and thinking rewired that she doesn't know the right thing from wrong anymore.
DeleteSome women don't cry out because they are so broken and defeated they have no more fight left in them to get up and run. Sigh! It is well for all our marriages may we not become terrorists or be married to one in JESUS MIGHTY NAME, AMEN.
Some women are physically abusive sha
Abusive men deserve to be taught a lesson before the woman walks away. Get some hefty men to beat him up and watch him cry like a he- goat. One fool that is so verbally and physically abusive will even insult ones mother and ones whole family....his Waterloo is waiting at a corner.
ReplyDeletestella she said being quiet is diff from bn silent... i fink she should explain the diff in this case because even u stella ur reply is still on d quiet side
ReplyDeleteThis was my point from yesterday when I said change of character in a woman and some well meaning nigerians said I must be a fool n.....i did not need to write an epistle to prove my point, but my point tho being no man shud hit a woman(r u cursed)?, but we women r the party the world listens to, but they forget we also have the traits that make these men see us as mad people.If u know ur husband is mad n ur talking annoys him don't talk,if u know u r silent n he beats u y not just move out, leave, get a divorce but don't stand there exchanging words with an animal.That was my point, if we have violent husbands should we stay and exchange words with them? it's spoken words that bring more words, would we swear that when we have issues with our husbands we don't throw words to prove our point? I did not say d hubby from yest was right to beat his wife,infact he shud be jailed.
ReplyDeleteN to the kids dear writer a man knows that if he wants to bring out the beast in a woman he shud touch her kids,@ that point they r her kids so she will fight tooth n nail to protect them.So I am sure those that wrote many grammar under my post yest can now get my point#i finally wrote the epistle#
Salt E don't mind them. Some of them would look straight into an angry man's face and tell him he can't do nothing, then when he re-arranges their face with dirty slap and punch, they will start crying. My dad taught me that " AM SORRY SIR" saves one from troubles.
DeleteThank God have vow to Almighty God that no matter wat.. I will never raise my hand up to beat my wife..
ReplyDeleteBecos she is my everything..
Proudly married man...
Abu Al-imran
Don't tell me rubbish!..Marriage isn't rosy at all
ReplyDeleteNot looking forward to it one bit..
Nice one Poster
If you are in an abusive relationship the best thing is to walk away!!!!!!
ReplyDeleteAngry poster kpele ehe:NO to domestic violence walk away
ReplyDeleteThank you jare, women have so accepted their fate that they doubt they deserve good treatment and partners who stand by them through thick and thin. When you see chronicles day in and out you just think all is lost and men are all beasts that when someone tells you a wonderful man exists you start doubting that its oxygen you breath and tell the person to wake up to reality forgetting that because you read crap doesnt mean everybody goes through them. Some women are so used to being treated badly that when they end up with good men they feel something is amiss thats why they are being so nice. If its not working in your favour my dear dont wait for someone to type an answer on sdk on your chronicle when you know the right thing to do.
ReplyDeleteMy comments with the rubbish women write on daily basis are numerous;
ReplyDelete1. Do you expect a man to walk away when a wife beats her husband. What makes you raise your hand to beat your husband could equally make the man to beat the woman. I just read on this blog yesterday how a woman slapped her husband and the husband beat her up and started claiming domestic abuse, can you imagine that trash! If you slap a man and he does not give you two slaps in return, the guy must be a f00l.
2. When the woman is at the disadvantage position, we say the woman is the weaker vessel but when she is at the advantage position, we shout equal right for all sexes.
Women should always use their fish brain well and stop ranting on stupid issues, women in most cases deserve what they get! For example, you see a rich man who cannot explain his source of wealth, a man that does not even have respect for his children - do you think that man will love you? Women, develop your fish brain. You insult and curse me, it goes back to your whole genertation cause I did not insult anyone.
She said she slapped him one time like that. He has beaten her numerous times and even extended it to their 3year old. So its not domestic violence abi? Your own ode carry fungi
Deletea.k.a EDWIN CHINEDU AZUBUKO said..
ReplyDelete.
I sometimes dont pity gals in abusive marriage bcos dey never marry for love, either dey marry for money, cute guy syndrome, and to make their mate jealous nothing else.....
.
.
***CURRENTLY IN JUPITER***
ed dreamz, gbayi.
DeleteThe truth is that a violent man will always find a way to hit his prey, maybe she talks or not, but what I knw for sure is that the signs are always there, I advice women going into marriage to google and search those signs that can make them knw a potential wife beater, digest them, when you see some of those triats in him, run away sharply or enter into the marriage at ur own risk!
ReplyDeleteThe issue of violence is a serious issue and I think those female law makers should make it a serious offence.
But some women too can be very annoying, though no matter what a man should never beat a woman but men are also humans and have emotions too, sometimes, the environment one grow up also contribute to the problem!
Women shine ur eyes, look critically before u leap!
Hmm
ReplyDeleteYou said it all. Silence works very well because it worked for me.
ReplyDeleteSilence works when the man truly loves you...Silence works when you know your husband well....I always use my sis as an example....she has a PhD in silent treatment. Now, silence doesn't mean that you stop doing what you have to do, in fact that is the time to do it best...She cooks and does the usual, but she ignores your life! when you sneeze, no "bless you"...you fall, no "sorry". ...she speaks to you when spoken to, in a cold, distant, and brief way, and what she'd normally laugh at, doesn't even make her lip twitch....now this works for her, because her husband adores her! For a man who has no feelings for you, your silence to him is a waste of time, and when domestic violence is involved, please walk away....
ReplyDeleteGod help me and my sharp mouth....lol
Your sister is my type of person. When am very angry, I keep quiet n boil cos talking at that point make me cry so as not to appear weak, I use silent. It works only when na person find my trouble. My revenge is best served cold...
DeleteDear concerned woman, silence is not golden in this case but, u know what is golden here? WALKING AWAY! Yes I said it "walk away".
ReplyDeleteThe difference btw Human and animals is our beautiful gifts of choice and freedom. Use them wisely.
I know some peeps will come here and tell her never to leave her home for someone else, pray to God to fix her marriage bla bla bla, I will always say walk away from the hell on earth and if you gonna pray for the marriage pls do so from afar.
I am " TeamWalkAway" from any form of abuse be it verbal, physical, sexual, emotional etc.
Team Walk Away from Abuse.
my dear poster its easier said dan done!..bin there seen it all and trust me it gets worse once the abuse starts and its almost like u anticipate anoda drama may ensue 4every lousy mistake done via words or actions. back den,i tried silent and vocal and all still resulted same.last last na me decide carry my kaya b4vi die lie easter fowl. the best tin is pray never to find urself in that predicament cos my dear its easy 2 dole out advise to others buh wen e begin happen real life 2 u, u go confuse pass some waka pass architects. may that never be any blog visitors portion ijn esp to those goin for 2nd missionary journey.
ReplyDeleteIt is well nwanne m.
DeleteOne man's meat is another man's poison. That silence worked for Mrs a does not mean it will work for Mrs b. Different strokes for different folks...
ReplyDeleteI hope all these abusers get a taste of their actions one day
ReplyDeleteAmen!
DeleteLol! Sometimes silence doesn't work oo! An angry man can take anytn as an offence! I hv been beaten in a relatnship b4 cos I kept quiet when he was askin me smtn! Just because I wanted peace to reign! He said I snobbed him nd it shows dis-respect! On anoda occasion I was also beaten cos I spoke back at him! Eida way an angry man is an angry man and will take advantage of anytn Weda ure quiet or shouting out loud!. Naa God go help us.
ReplyDeleteI hope these abusers get a taste of their actions one day
ReplyDeleteThis rant makes no sense....mtchewwww! I took my time to read this diligently still I didn't see any useful tip or points only shouting.
ReplyDeleteSmtcheeeww......make Una no run ooo!!!, make Una die dia awon Aborkorku oshi.....
ReplyDeleteMy mum's friend has been down with stroke for some months now....wetin cause am?? D only daughter she has was beaten to death by her husband, she was d bread winner of the family ooo....she died leaving two kids behind ...she was even pregnant when the hubby beat her, before they could rushed her to the hospital, she gave up.....smh!
D mama wan die of stroke now...nobody to give her money and food again!!
I heard they tried moving her out of d bastard man's house but she still went back claiming to be in love....
Smtcheeeww Smtcheeeww!!!!
Your write-up de always amuse me I nor know why.
DeleteIf cuss nor de wetin you write, walahi, I nor go read cos na wetin my eye de first find before I read proper
Kikikikiki
Gbam! Awom oloshi no dey then no be okija wife never begin. Lol
DeleteHahahahahahahahahaha...
DeleteMe too Bloglord...
Lol bloggy !!!!
DeleteQueen and belle.....una weldone o!!
DeleteNo wonder she keeps cussing here cos she thinks she's mouthed or av arrived. Keep looking for her cuss words as she exhibits her nuisance self. U think gra gra n cussing out here makes u a feared bv or a popular ass hole? Forming hard wey no enter market. N ppl keep deceiving u when dey r the same ones cussing u under anonymous. Keep fooling urself but knw dat ur cusses cannot intimidate anyone n u can't be Ezeanwanyi overnight. Copy cat oshi. Lousy daughter of a zero star ex military man dat grew up in a dirty barrack, now married n lives in a dungeon called Iba.. no wonder! Tueh!
DeleteI completely agree with you. Pls let's understand that there is a difference btw been QUIET and Been SILENT. Indeed the best way out is SILENCE cos he does not know what is on my mind. Have seen it work severally.
ReplyDeleteHusbands love your wife as Christ loves the Church. Christ does not beat, he does not hit, he is not verbally abusive. Please and please if you feel the need to throw punches, find a man your size and throw a punch. Women, if he starts insulting you...do not attribute it to a man's ego or anything of that nature...he will graduate to hitting. My sisters tend to get beaten more and I don't know why, please ladies it is not normal for a man to beat you. You are not his child, he is not your father. Your daughters are watching and they might end up with a man that will kill them. Your sons are watching and they might end up killing a woman. There is no honour in being the persevering wife of a man who has no self control. You are not doing yourself, or your kids a favour.
ReplyDeleteIf you are a woman who throws insults a lot, you are verbally abusive and if your man leaves you then he is in his right. No body man or woman should endure abuse. So do not think calling him names constantly even when he offends you makes you an angel. Men, it is no reason to hit a woman. Women do not harm you when you dirty the place, refuse to show them love, cheat and infect them, report them to your family and lie on them to your mistresses. So you have no excuse.
An abusive spouse has broken their vows and does not deserve your time until they get counseling. Begging does not mean anything, an abusive person hates to look bad to the public and will beg you and then turn around and beat you more.
Single ladies, a man will not change once you marry him. YOU CAN NOT CHANGE HIM. Focus your prayers on better things instead of praying for him to change, he can only change if HE wants. If he slaps you once, insults you...he will do worse. A man with temper issues needs to fix it before getting married. Men, a woman who insults you will do worse after marriage, leave her to grow up and learn a lesson.
Pls, the woman that sent d mail she sent to her husband here should pls come give us feedback oh. I'd like to know how everything turned out.
ReplyDeleteDomestic violence has become the order of d day everywhere.... God save us
ReplyDeleteThe cure for abusive marriages is simple and short: TAKE A WALK.
ReplyDeleteForget all those silence is golden bullshit. You would remain silent and at the end it's your dead body that is carried away from the home.
Ladies should be wise and protect their lives...
Anon 15:39 and BlogLord just made my day, u f**king walk out of that abusive marriage biko,damn society, forget what ur pastor or friends will say, na u know whr fire dey burn u. Please women shine ur eyes silence doesnt work for evryone
ReplyDeleteGod help us
ReplyDeleteI don't know, I feel this whole right up is neither here nor there#contradictory
ReplyDeleteSilence is not an option at all in domestic violence,simple WALK AWAY!
ReplyDeletedope writeup
ReplyDelete#GODWIN™
Truly going silent is worse they see it that ur being rude . How ? Yeye men NA yeye men.
ReplyDeletebut e get as e b
ReplyDelete#GODWIN™
Nice write up! But my own is a man or a woman can't just change over night, he/she must av shown u dt side of his/her character b4 u married him but bc we are so desperate to take d MRS dis title, we ignore dose signs. Single ladies pls its not a must to marry, it's better u re a happy single lady dan a bitter married lady. Damn d society or dose that will call u Anty Gwegwegwe, damn them, shine ur eyes n marry well. Say no to domestic violence. I av threatened my fiance one day he got so angry and tried raising his hands on me, I didn't talk, I just eyed him, and after he brought his hand down n asked me why I did dt, I told him dt d day I will leave him is d day he will ever in his life beat me, even if his hand mistakenly touched me. He didn't say much again bc he knows I don't make empty threat, so it's good ur spouse knows ur worth and what u are capable of doing. He knows I av struggled with him, n I no all his weak points n he knows dt wen I walk away, dt I will also ruin him in d process. So ladies know ur man well, n be supportive so dt he will know d danger of beating u, bc if a man knows his wife's worth n strength, he won't try rubbish with her. So be a woman of resource, an independent woman, a woman of virtue n den enjoy ur man, n be submissive too, den after all these he still beats u, den speak up, n find help.
ReplyDeleteCan u guys stop saying that a man must have showed that side before marriage! Its a big fat lie, only some may have. Men can be great pretenders, women too. So pls, quit using dat phrase
DeleteNice post.... No body deserves to b treated like a punching bag.... No woman deserves dat....... . D best tin to do is to walk away
ReplyDeleteSilence is not the best answer given to an abusive man. Just walk away.
ReplyDeleteWomen should just walk away and never put up with an abusive man. A leopard will NEVER change its spot. If he hits you ONCE, he will hit you TWICE, and then AGAIN and AGAIN.
ReplyDeleteSo help marriages oh God, I am sick and tired of all this unhappy endings
ReplyDeleteHmmmm.......
ReplyDeleteLord help marriages of this generation. Things are just so different from the way God designed them to be from the beginning. Does it mean the end is so near? God have mercy.
ReplyDeletePLS BV's I need your advise,my boyfriend of 2yrs recently slapped me,i really don't know if this is a one-off or maybe im even the one dat caused it. We don't stay in d same town so I visited him for d wkend abt a mnth ago, while dere for just abt 4days, every single nite he wld go out with his friends each day, leave me all alone in d house and come in smtimes 1am,2am etc. So I got angry d nite before I was to leave, bcos he was out again till 1am, knowing fully well I will leave d nxt morning. So I got so mad and threw his clothes all over d place he had arranged it. He got back saw it,and was shouting. so I locked myself in d room.
ReplyDeleteHe broke down d door, came in abused me and slapped me.
This is the 1st time he has ever slapped me, now im scared that I hope he doesn't do it again.
My question is, shld you leave a r'lshp over a mistake a man makes to slap you once. Can this be viewed as domestic violence. Bcos we are all human's dat can make mistakes at anytime. My fear is I don't want to marry a man dat will end up beating me, at d same time it may have been a mistake on his own part cos he apologized immediately. PLS ADVISE
Run! As fast as ur legs can carry you. Damn! Some ladies sha, you went to visit him and he can't even spend time with you just for four days, he prefers to spend time with his friends he sees everyday! Na wa o, thank God u ain't married to him yet, Shebi na just slap he don give you, abeg no wait till he go break your head o, he has no reason watsoever to raise his hands on you, I repeat, NO REASON. And a man dat truly loves you will spend every time with you considering you are visiting for just a few days. Catch brain o my friend
DeleteMy dear,run n don't look back. 1ce it starts it would never stop. B4 I got married to my hubby,that's hw he slapped me one night in d presence of his friend. Why? I was gisting with a male friend on phone while he left me all alone till late in d night,this prsn I was gisting with is family o,we had our childhood together. I became furious n tried to fight bk,but his friend held me. Anyway,after d whole ish I told him I wasnt interested in d relationship again,na so d guy begin cry n beg dt he dint knw wt came over him
DeleteI can count 3 instances b4 marriage o,oh well stupid me I still went ahead n married him. Are u asking if d beating still continued? Yes it did,and he would use any reason whatever to abuse me either verbally or physically.
If I had discovered stella's blog 6/7years ago,I probably wouldn't have bn married to him today. I had no friends and I wasnt ready to let my folks knw wt I was going through
We are very much like strangers o,d only time he talks to me his wn he wants to shout or complain abt something. He's got no love whatsoever. I'm not love deprived o,my parents and kids love and above all God loves me.
D boat for sex sailed a long time ago wn he started cheating and sleeping with my housemaids. Y would I open my legs for such,in his mind he thinks I would flinch n go beg him to have sex with me. Like Stella said and I quote"sex is overrated".
So my dear,sorry for d long epistle. If he slaps you 1ce over something as trivial as scattering his clothes on d floor,be ready for a lifetime of beating. There's nothing called a mistake,it would only occur again n again.
You are created n formed to be appreciated,taken care of not bruised n battered. Sex makes it difficult to leave a toxic relationship. Stop d sex,close ur eyes n get out of that relationship now.
Don't ever settle for less.
Love itself
BabyBee
You were very wrong for what you did, however, he broke down the door? Hmmmmm, omo run o
DeleteDude doesn't respect you one bit.
DeleteI mean...you travel all the way to spend quality time with him yet he leaves you to spend time with the furniture's in his house while he's out in the town with the boys?
And then...He slaps you too?
Ok, let me state this here without holding back that you pushed him to slapping you by throwing his clothes all over the place.
I mean, if you didn't like the way he was treating you, you should have packed your thingss, dropped his keys for him before he gets back and leave.
That would have sent a message more .. than trying to annoy him to get his attention. That would have made him know that you have your self esteem and know your worth without you even saying a word.
But no! You stayed, acting like without hI'm there is no you and then getting him into a state of rage .
You don chop slap na.
Am not saying he was right to slap you though ( he ought to have self control no matter what) but I mean let's not bring out the devil in a man and cry wolf.
Tho a man who is an idiot is what it is....an idiot.
If he slaps you once, he will definitely do it again.
And you too, stop pushing him.
If you can't deal, then walk!
It's that simple.
Listen to yourself, you dont stay in the same town and u visited him for just 4days and he cldnt stick around just to hang with you but kept on night crawling with his friends meaning you are not worth spending time with.
DeleteSecondly you locked yourself in the room, he broke down the door shooo na bulldozer? That enough before the abuse and slap is enough to even boot your brain about not staying in that relationship again. Run because he doesnt value you and he cant keep his anger in check, next time he will kill you and apologize to your family.
Anon 17:30,
DeleteNa so e dey start...
Please leave this guy now!!!!!...
Who wrote dis brainless write up? Is it his big penis dat is mkn u nt av sense or it d change he gvs u. It starts wit a slap nd gradually bcms smtn else. Use ur brain nd stp askn stupid questns here..mstchewwwwwwwwww.
DeletePls don't leave...wait till he breaks ur nose
DeleteMy dear u need to take ur time and ask yourself wat u really want in a man, do u find all dat in him? Having a guy dat keeps such late night can never do u any good n it is enough reason to know u don't need dat kind of relationship. If u eventually marry dis guy, will he always come home to u? Or will he start sleeping out? For him to hit u becos u scattered his clothes on d floor not even on d gutter simply shows he doesn't understand ur feelings. A man who understands his woman craves for his attention and will do anytin to get it,will come home begging u to pardon him,promising u it won't happen again. It might be difficult to leave dat relationship but u need to do dat for ur own good and happiness.
DeleteI'm not so interested in the slap, Wat I want to know is how a woman will visit her man and he will live her to go out and hang out with oda guys, my dear I believe he doesn't even love you, so put on ur walking shoes. It's even possible he has another girl in town dt he goes out to spend tym with. Trust me it has happened to someone I know be wise.
DeleteThe bottom line is uf u are in an abusive marriage kindly take a walk, marriage no be by force.
ReplyDeleteGod pls fix it,na wah.
ReplyDeleteBeing quiet is not stupidity. Men does not like when u talk back , silence is golden.
ReplyDelete@Lyndy,no body is a sooth Sayer. I think they pretend to be nice during courtship, so it's only by God's grace. Pls whoever that find herself in such situation should speak out, not to die in silent.
ReplyDeleteIf you can't stand the beatings, take a walk and then serve GOD wholeheartedly.
ReplyDeleteYou should soak him in the blood of Jesus when he cheats. smh. What nonsense.
ReplyDeleteWould he soak you in the blood of Jesus if you cheated or most likely throw your things out/end the marriage? Delusional women.
I assume you must have been praying for him and soaking him anyway yet that did not stop him from cheating on you.
Change has to come from within. I will NEVER PRAY/SOAK my husband if he cheats on me; that he knows.
Rather i will pray for myself to be able to forgive him.
Spouses who cheat on their better halves are not worthy of respect and are dangerous.
They should soak their disgusting selves abeg.
Smh Soak Ko, Drench Ni.
Anon 17:30, with all the stories you read on this blog, you are still asking this question.
ReplyDeleteMy dear, a man that is not married to you yet is already leaving you at home every night and coming back by 1am even when you were just visiting for four days. He even abused you and slapped you for just scattering his clothes... and you are still asking questions.
That guy doesn't respect/love you enough to marry you and if he marries you, you have, with your two legs and clear eyes worked into emotional, physical and spiritual abuse. Please don't send us any chronicle after.
It is well,say no to domestic violence !!!!!!!!!
ReplyDeleteStella you dey eat my comments abi? I posted about not soaking any cheating husband you no approve am. You come approve 3 comments wey no dey dia before I post. #Kontinu
ReplyDeleteAs long as he hit u once ( whether slapped u mistakenly or beaten u) he will hit u again and again and again, then if u want to DIE, marry him!
ReplyDeleteAnon 17:30...Girlfriend of Bulldozer Boyfriend. Are you a child? Why scatter clothes because you are angry? You deserved something but not a slap.
ReplyDeleteThere is no reason a man or woman should slap their Sig. Other...NONE. He broke down the door, what kind of psycho are you dating. You should have acted like an adult but dear sister, he broke down the door he is crazy. You better respect yourself and leave the man. After that please learn to channel your anger to adult reactions.
on point!love you Grace!
ReplyDeletethank you eka joy for that sane comment. sick and tired of hearing he must have showed signs before the marriage. don't you guys know men pretend? you think its only women that are eager to get married.
ReplyDelete