Stella Dimoko Korkus.com: Labour Room Drama - 2

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Saturday, September 03, 2016

Labour Room Drama - 2

*Goose Bumps*







Sometime ago, on my way back from the market, I quickly dashed into a nearby supermarket. I bought three bottles of three different alcoholic beverages. I went to a nearby eatery and bought Sharwarma.



 I got home, went straight to my bedroom, ate the Sharwarma and consumed two bottles of the alcoholic drinks. I fell on the cold floor and dozed off. When I woke up, I knew I was pregnant.


I told my husband I was pregnant. He was surprised because we weren’t planning on having kids then. He said, “since you are sure it’s pregnancy, let’s make love now. I don’t want one finger or any body part to be missing. Just that once, you are pregnant? Take your position on the bed, let’s perfect the previous work”.

Me : “How many times will you kill a tiger before you are called a tiger killer?”

We travelled out. I registered for ANC when we got back. I didn’t bother with all those routine drugs. I substituted the drugs with their natural food sources (I hate drugs). I made sure I took the folic acid though. I was a strong pregnant woman. Each visit to the clinic, the doctor would write UNEVENTFUL PREGNANCY in my file.

After 36 weeks of pregnancy, I was tired of being pregnant. I looked forward to my baby’s arrival. 


At 40 weeks, on the day I had doctor’s appointment, I told my husband to shave my pubic hairs and cut my fingernails and toenails. I dressed lovely, put on make-up and arrived the hospital. I told the doctor I was ready to give birth. 

He told me to lie down for examination. As he put his fingers inside my something, I screamed and told him I was kidding about giving birth that day. He laughed at my pain and reminded me that something bigger than his fingers would come out from there. 

The cervix was already dilated to 2cm or 4cm so I was told to go get my bag.
I went back home, cooked jollof rice for my guy and headed back to the hospital. I was assigned a private ward. I asked for a magazine to read. The TV was on too. I requested for sausage roll and soda. I felt more like in a hotel room than in a hospital room. 


My cervix was still strong. Labour was induced intravenously around 1pm. By 5pm, I felt serious pain like menstrual cramp. I hollered at a nurse who was busy watching Zee World. I was taken to the labour room.

While in pain, the two nurses would say “Madam Sorry”. The nurse in charge came to me and said, ‘madam, please co-operate with me when the time comes’. I retorted, “are we in a co-operative union, please go away”. They laughed. I laughed too. I bore my pain without showing it because what else would they say if not SORRY!

 I felt like urinating but then I was already dilated to 8cm or so, they didn’t let me go. They used a tube to suck it out. The N-in C told me to tell her when I felt like poo-ing because I was not talking or shouting. I was quiet but in my heart, I was praying seriously. The nurse ruptured my amniotic sac. By 7pm, the doctor came and massaged my cervix. I felt better. At 10cm, the nurse checked and told me my baby was crying and wanted to come out. I doubted that babies cry in the womb but this is true as I learnt later. She used olive oil to massage my cervix to aid the pushing. By 7.30pm, I felt like pooing, I pushed but the pain stopped. I stopped pushing too. An elderly nurse who walked in earlier, told me I didn’t push well. 


She told me to hold my ankles next time I wanted to push. At  7.40pm, the pain came again. I held my ankles and pushed. I heard, “madam, your baby’s head is out, push with all your strength so that you don’t strangle the baby”. I wanted to look at the head but I was like, shebi I will still see this head later. I pushed with all my strength. A beautiful hairy baby came out and the whole pain disappeared. Baby weighed 4.1kg. The doctor came in to congratulate me. I thanked God, the nurses and the doctor. 

After cleaning me, I showered. My baby was already dressed and was waiting for me in the room. I held her, kissed her forehead, prayed for her, prophesied on her and then I called my baby daddy.


*Wow!!!



91 comments:

  1. Replies
    1. Baby daddy or husband which one do U have exactly?

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    2. Nice! Enjoyed the write up but squirmed a little at massaging the cervix.

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    3. What is there to enjoy? You talk like a child

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    4. I actually loved dis I had to comment ...lovely writeup ! N I love dfact DAT u call ur hubby 'babydaddy'

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    5. *eyeroll*
      They induced you and the pain was bearable, no shouting. Ok.

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    6. James's stepbrother, cheap ass!4 September 2016 at 04:04

      Fuck shitt!. So you left your baby with the nurse, went to shower and called your husband. Na wah for you and pussy husband for leaving your baby with a stranger. Dumb dumb dumb!
      I was in the room from the beginning to the end, make sure they don't switch our baby or do something wrong. I nor trust oyibo people at all

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  2. Awwww. Lovely one.


    I'd love to hear these stories from the men. To know how they felt and all.lol

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  3. Madam, it's obvious you are very learned from your write up. ..
    or you copy & paste from somewhere?... Anyway Congrats.!!

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    Replies
    1. Stupid question..U think dis blog is filled with illiterates like u? Pls crawl back to d hell hole u came out from.

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    2. Yeah learned, she is right.

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    3. Everyone isn't like you sweety.

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  4. Real Wow!!! Lol. Nice one. You r one strong woman

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  5. So your baby Daddy no dey hospital all this while? Congrats dear. Sounds Zee Worlds too.

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    Replies
    1. Just like you sound

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    2. James's stepbrother, cheap ass!4 September 2016 at 04:07

      I wonder o, baby daddy nor wan see big pwessy πŸ˜€πŸ˜„πŸ˜ƒπŸ‘€

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  6. Thank God for that long journey. Its indeed a journey. God bless all the good mothers out there.

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  7. Wow!...
    Thank God I didn't go through this process to give birth...
    Imagine pushing out a human being from your kini...
    Damn it!...

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    Replies
    1. Queen,I was shouting CS upandan until I saw the one wey pass me.
      CS ooh, virginal ooh,anyone wey baby wanna follow come make in come.
      CS has it own disadvantage

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    2. Portable,I will still choose CS over and over again!...
      Maybe the one you saw was done by all those quacks that parade themselves as medical doctors in Nigeria...

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    3. Na Lie, Al things being equal SVD is beta dan CS.

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    4. Nme get your facts rights!! Even with experts CS still can be complicated. Bladder or colon puncture, adhesions, reaction to anaesthesia and many more. Dont be so naive dear, only in
      cases of severe mal presentations , fetal or maternal distress , cephalopelvic disproportions etc can you suggest Cs . Queen ,only the smallest diameter of the head passes through the birth canal . If well guided the peri should be intact and vagina returns to its pre- del. state.
      N

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  8. Hian! Not to sound like a hater, but madam ooo... the kain spices wey you add for this story is just too much to ignore lol

    Thank God for you and your baby! Safe delivery next time

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    Replies
    1. Lmao,you noticed the spices too? Too damn much biko.

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  9. Wow! Is never an easy one tho! Thumbs up to all women world wide especially my mama and my wife to be........

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  10. WOW! YOU MADE IT SOUND SO EASY...CONGRATS DEAR U RAE A STRONG WOMAN.

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  11. Always pray for her and be a good mentor to her.

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  12. Replies
    1. Yes baby daddy!!!! You wanted her to lie and claim ghost hubby.

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    2. Lol. Technically her husband is her baby daddy. Even if they weren't married what's your own?

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  13. Lovely story.. u sound dramatic sha.. i like u

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  14. Phewwww!!
    *wipes sweat off brows*
    The way my heart beats while reading these labour stories ehnn..
    Make we dey go sha..
    Lord have mercy!

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    Replies
    1. my sister, and am ttc ooo but some stories scares me to the bone.

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    2. Bwahahahaha.
      Don't wipe them brows yet.
      πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜πŸ˜πŸ˜πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜

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  15. You narrative made it seem so easy. Well what do I kno. Thank God for your life and your baby!

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  16. This is beautiful! God bless my womb too

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  17. This ur story made labour sound fun and easy!!! Wow

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  18. Poster!!!!!!!! Na so e easy????? Well done

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  19. Lol very uneventful..I wish it's as easy as dis o..lol

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  20. OlaGold (add up 58BF8F56 for 18-24k raw gold dust and bar)3 September 2016 at 13:45

    This poster ehhhh. Very funny. Interesting! Lol@ baby daddy. Me like itπŸ˜‰

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  21. Chi mu oh! Sounds quite easy na. Abeg I wan get belle joor.
    Thank God for you madam.

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  22. Wow am impressed... strong woman.

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  23. Hmmm this isn't the same Labour I witnessed, well seems you have a high threshold for pain. Congrats...

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  24. I felt so emotional reading ur story...
    Congratulations

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  25. Enter your comment...Awww nice but no be this type I for like hear ooo.Anyways stella me wey get four experiences how I go take send my own
    #thinkingaloud
    shey na d one wey I kick nurse abi the one wey I shout for husband head abi the one wey I dey laugh with nurses for labour room abi......uhmm uhmm make I go compose one send stella

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    Replies
    1. Shebi when u started commenting on dis blog with ur annoying buggy buggy comments u said u are a single mother of one? How come u get four kids now and a horseband? Make una dey sofri dey lie oh.

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    2. Is it your lie?

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  26. Awwww..... That was such a good read. Very funny woman.
    God bless your lil princess.

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  27. Nice.Knowing how painful labor is, I'm surprise you maintained your sanity enough to remember all these details. Congratulations on your baby.

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    Replies
    1. Especially the time line. Yimmu to the story. Real pregnant woman send in yours

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  28. Nice style of writing...It leaves more to imagination and curiosity.thanks for making my weekend.

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  29. May we all go in and come out with our babies irrespective of what we face in that room. Cos loosing a baby is worst pain on earth.

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    Replies
    1. Not to mention loosing the mother.

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  30. #Sometimes what you're most afraid of doing is the very thing that will set you free*

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  31. Awwww..u painted a sweet painful experience.. Wish I'd have access to hearing stories like this when am preggie..all have heard is scary and creepy tales..thanks for giving me hope..Lol

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  32. The story makes labour look like a piece of cake... Anyway its better you put it this way in order not to create fear and anxiety for first time moms...when i was in labour with my first son i tore the doctors shirt and screamed at the matron for tellimg me to push so my baby's head could come out.. Meanwhile this is a woman i answered yes ma during ANC and bought her gifts sef.. I thank God and my doctor for his patience and understanding... I came back and made up for tearing his shirt.. Lol.. We thank God for everything joo.

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  33. Nawa oooo. God have mercy oooo.

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  34. Kai, nice read... and you say women are the weaker vessel?? Come and be going please

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  35. Poster im happy for you dear, congrats

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  36. beautiful story,but no vex,wsh day dem start to massage cervix?was it d internal os or external os dat was massage?lol probably u felt it was d cervix,cus d one i kn cannot b massage,i have actually done vaginal examination countless tyms n u cnt massage it.delivery no easy o even though am a nurse am more than scared to enter dat room,m glad u gave birth to such a big baby without getting an episiotomy.lol during delivery ehh u ll kn how ugly the vulva is.most tyms wen d babies head is visible n d woman is weak to push,some midwifes will land u a heavy slap.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Azin!!!
      My mouth still dey wide open... 4.1?!!!!!
      Wow!

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    2. Maybe she was told massage but it could be sweeping of the cervix to hasten dilatation of the cervix. Had a 4.2kg baby with episiotomy tho.

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    3. Land you heavy slap , you must stay in a village or the nurses in your hospital are just the avearge meanies that Nigerian nurses are known to be. In the SW, nurses are actually more humane and I enjoyed my birth...

      Oh and yes I had 4.1kg girl without episiotomy though she's my 2md

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  37. beautiful story,but no vex,wsh day dem start to massage cervix?was it d internal os or external os dat was massage?lol probably u felt it was d cervix,cus d one i kn cannot b massage,i have actually done vaginal examination countless tyms n u cnt massage it.delivery no easy o even though am a nurse am more than scared to enter dat room,m glad u gave birth to such a big baby without getting an episiotomy.lol during delivery ehh u ll kn how ugly the vulva is.most tyms wen d babies head is visible n d woman is weak to push,some midwifes will land u a heavy slap.

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    Replies
    1. I've hear of cervix massage before, actually from a TTC mom
      she said one old woman like that does it for people to take on or something ...I didn't enquire further

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  38. Nice story but the tin dey pain o,I can still remember the pain I went tru, for now I don't think I want another child because I can't stand the pain, it was so painful that I was still angry even after a week,I bless God, he is faithful

    Bimbola was here.

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    Replies
    1. Lol @"I was still angry even after a week"

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  39. I remember every single thing I did@ Rosie

    I remember the non-stop questions. "What's that needle for Doc " what are you doing with the gloves?πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ™Œ "what will this drug do to me"

    Knowing helped me with pains too.
    I read extensively and got tips on how to cope.

    These are the things that helped me:

    Apart from handing the whole process to God:

    I went and got my toes nails painted a nice torquiose. I needed to atleast feel cheery and motivated. I could barely see it, but it made me happy, very happy..πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚

    Immediately you start experiencing contractions time yourself...as it gets closer. Get ready,maybe that's the real deal.

    Not everyone's water broke,mine didn't, the doctors did the job😳 I only saw my "show". I have always wondered why they refer to some mucus with streaks of blood as "show"

    Get some sleep between the contractions. You will be happy you slept that day.

    Eat light,you don't wanna feel too heavy.i took like 2 slices of bread..I didn't want to have a shitty experience thereπŸ˜€

    Conserve your energy,don't bother using it up screaming or cussing ....you need it. I grunted.

    Try and empty your bowell,don't keep the urine inside... Stand up and go pee ,it makes you dilate faster.

    Don't push until you are asked to,to avoid giving yourself tears...do kegels to help you in controlling the muscles that will totally take a mind of their own during the last stage of labor.

    My second time was totally different though.
    You know these kids surprise us every time....totally different but I love how it turned out.πŸ‘πŸΎ

    Weldone poster!

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    Replies
    1. Exactly.. my membrane was intact was ruptured manually.. and if truly wat iexpended was Labour den i wil be glad to exprnce it ova and ova agn.

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  40. Wow, it sounds so easy.... I can't wait to write mine, few weeks to go.

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  41. People though, is it your pregnancy abi why doubt the story? What of those people that labour for just 10mins then give birth almost immediately. That means y'all would doubt that too. If you don't work in a maternity ward, don't doubt experiences you've never seen, just pray for ease once it's your time.

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    Replies
    1. Bless you. Everyone is not dramatic. I didn't bother to call my husband when I was in labour at the hospital.it was not an emergency and he is not a doctor. Why distract a working man?

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  42. Labour room experience is hmmmmnnnn. Good thing is that as soon as the baby is out all pain is forgotten. May our labour never go in vain. My heart goes out to my neighbour who miscarried her 7months pregnancy on Sunday. 7 good months. Talking to her today she said its an attack cos she did scan earlier in the week and everything was confirmed okay. Painful part is she had to undergo CS for the dead baby to be brought out, imagine the pain for a baby that is nonexistence. They were charged 180k, in fact let me not explain further bcos I'm pained. Attack or no attack, God see's all that is hidden...and God help us all, Amen.
    *God bless my Angel in human form*

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  43. My mum had me under 5minutes, yes it was that fast like super fast. #inodeygivemymamawahala

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