Stella Dimoko Korkus.com: TTC Stories -Part 3

Advertisement

Advertisement - Mobile In-Article

Thursday, 28 September 2017

TTC Stories -Part 3

To every couple TTCing ,here is hoping and praying fervently that you find strength,courage,hope and knowledge on how to handle yourself during this trying journey in JESUS name.






The Decision To LIVE- 

Attending naming ceremonieshave to be the most awkward scenario for a woman TTC,especially in this part of the world. I really didn't just jump into this conclusion,but after attending a reasonable number of naming ceremonies,I was faced with a subtle yet uncomfortable truth- As a woman TTC in Nigeria,naming ceremonies will bring you face to face with the brutal yet subtle way in which we are stigmatized.


Here I was at a close family member's naming ceremony(I Love babies,always have and always will). At the venue,I went round greeting everyone(a necessary culture requirement,and "as a dutiful wife as I is nasi went to greet elders,friends and family).


Instead of getting a 'Thank you' response to my congratulations greeting,I got Ire-Akari meaning the blessing will go round. Don't get me wring,I love prayers and I am thrilled to hear that you are praying for me,but how about we keep it in the closet and stop being such an emotional terrorist?


Hearing this over and over and over again was overwhelming I almost went to hide myself in a corner out of shame and just basically wearied from feeling like I had a disease of some sort.


The pastor arrived and conducted the ceremony,then came the prayer point- 'If there is anyone here praying for this wonderful bundle of joy'- at this point I wouldn't even lie,I opened my eyes slightly and true to my thoughts,a couple of people were staring at me!!!!! chai,shame catch me no be small.


I said to myself- Babe,if you do not make a conscious and daily effort to take charge over your life and LIVE,nobody will do it for you.Two things can happen after this,I could either raise my head up,smile,square my shoulders and enjoy the party OR Cower under the emotional bombs dropped left,right and centre.


The tests are painful enough,the struggle is hard already,I couldn't afford to have people steal my life and peace by brooding all over the place. With this decision,I stood up and went straight to the caterers stand,got two portions of Ofada rice - Best decision I made that Day (the rice was amazing,I almost went for more,but decided to allow others eat as well). After eating,I hit the dance floor and really danced away my pain and shame.


My IUI journey-



Body and system fully rested,we(hubs and i) got a recommendation to a fertility hospital with a commendable record in assisted conception.


Quick prayer:- I pray that GOD blesses every couple TTC in JESUS name,may. flood gates of heaven be open upon you,your works/businesses and also lay it on people's heart to bless you in JESUS name.


Why did I pray? well fertility treatment odi very very expensive(read this in deep igbo accent). We stepped into the hospital and were handed the flyer's(Nna mehn,I had to pour myself a cup of cold water at from the dispenser to cool down my nerves) The great thing about this clinic though is that compared to other places,this is affordable.


We paid for registration was included tests for us both (talk about value for money) then prepared to get the tests done.


Depending on your age,IUI is said to have just about a 25% chance of conception but for us and our pockets at the time,that was good enough.


while preparing for our first test,we heard shouts of joy, a 52year old woman had put to bed and that for us was an amazing rush of joy,hope and happiness.


First test was to get my Husband's semen(I don't know any other decent word to use for this)so I went in with him for moral support. As weird and nollywoody as this may sound,our conversation was:-


Hubs:- It quickly remove your jeans let's do this


Me:- This is a hospital Babe,try to control yourself


Hubs:- Wait ooo,how else do you expect me to produce the required semen?


Me:- gave option


Hubs:- Don't waste time,lie down sharp sharp when I you heard the 52 year old that just gave birth,besides a bed wouldn't be here if they didn't want us to..........


Long story short,we did and took the specimen to the matron. Little did we know,that the lab analyst would ask for the mode of retrieval.


My husband's response was in low current as I could barely hear him mutter 'intercourse even though I sat right beside him.


After the results,I went in to get my medication which included injection shots to start from Day 2 of my cycle. The shots are to be administered either at the upper tight of under belly- it's nothing to worry about as it's not painful at all(the needle is quite small)


After day 1,you will probably be brave enough to do it yourself on the other days. Next is the follicle monitoring to ensure that the meds are working as required.


GOD's Intention for Couples


- Is that we will be fruitful,multiply and replenish the earth
- That he he blessed us with the blessing of the womb and of the breast
- None shall be barren in the land as we serve him.


There are alot of promises concerning childbirth and I say them to myself over and over again to encourage and strengthen my mind,for his words will not fall to the ground.


The day of insemination came and everything seemed good and we were set for the procedure. It's completely painless,so rest easy. You will just be required to lay back for a few minutes then get a good sleep afterwards.


Date was given for the pregnancy test result,and not being anxious is easier said than done. We decided to go sight seeing in another state just to get our minds off the issue at hand or worrying about what the final test result will be.


On our visit to the hospital to test for pregnancy,the silence was just killing. Plus I had gone out to buy baby things,cleared out a part of my wardrobe and arranged the clothes and booties.


The consultant wasn't around,so his assistant attended to us. Took my blood sample to the lab and we waited for our result. The minute she stepped into the reception,I knew the result was negative- Her body language and her trying so hard not to keep eye contact said it all. She must have gone back into the lab and out into the reception at least three times(this was clearly her first sad news to break).


After parambulating,she finally invited us into the consulting room and I said to her - 'it's okay,the result is negative right? and she said 'Yes. Everything else she said,sounded far because my mind had wondered off in deep thoughts.


I couldn't cry,I was just numb. The amazing part for me was this- I was at peace within myself regardless of the news I just received and I knew I wasn't going to give up on trying. So I asked her when we could come in for another procedure,and was required to wait for at least one or two more cycles. while we wait,they will also go over our history and the procedure to determine what went wrong.


I don't know how we got home That day,but we did. No talks at all as we drove in silence,both thinking on what could have happened and why the result was negative.


meanwhile,I still had to open my wardrobe and stare at the clothes that I couldn't even bear to look at anymore..............


For HE makes everything beautiful in HIS time.


Next log will be about my next IUI and IVF by GOD'S grace.


42 comments:

Miss Ess said...

It is well. Only God Can.

ladybird banks said...

OMG reading this I couldn't help but hug my daughter so tight and cry... Oh Lord please I beg you give them this joy. Bless them with even one..

Twins Squared said...

The pains women go through in this life ehh. To marry, conceive,give birth and raise them well. It is well with us

Anonymous said...

And He will.

Cute hajia Omo Mummy said...

It is well poster. God ll surely answer your prayers.

IJAY said...

It is well with you, God of Sarah will do it for you and every other TTC

chinenye Lynda said...

GOD will do it for u, u might not go for iui or ivf. Again

Anonymous said...

God will make a way soon hun..im a living witness

BettyO said...

Having been TTC for 4 years, I must tell you that it is not easy getting that negative sign on the stick every month. God will come thru for us all. #ttc#tubalfactor#1failedIVFcycle#whichwayLord?

jay urchy said...

Poster it is well with you. God will surprise you.

Ralu M said...

I can relate in a big way...I try to avoid naming ceremonies if I can help it,the side looks...pity or snarky (take your pick) the "God will do it oh" sayings I know you are praying for me but kindly not remind me everytime we speak. I'm here to eat rice and dance mbok 😩. It's like a cloud following one everywhere to every damn place so I'm fighting back by looking a million bucks all the time I go out.
Don't get me started on the ivf...the injections (56 freaking days)at a point your pain threshold kicks in and gives you a reprieve, egg retrieval (painful as hell), egg placement and then the pain of the failure...do you want coldstone? Chinese cuisine? Naaaa I want a positive pregnancy test result 😭😭😭😭 (I played Frank Edwards "Ogene doh" all the way home)
I pray not to experience such pain again and then sucking it up cos you just have to be at work the next day.
God makes everything beautiful in His time that is my comfort. I've already named my twins and they'll surely come into existence 😊😊😊.

BettyO said...

Yes, He makes ALL things beautiful in His time. He will come thru for us.

Nenye said...

This is so touching but I commend your faith. One thing is certain and that is God is too Faithful to fail. Believe, trust, praise and expect and it shall be yours. Your next testimony shall be that Halleluyah

Patience said...

May the Good Lord grant your Heart desires.

Royal Royalty said...

father lord,my period is supposed to come today abd its almost 2pm.pls lord,let it not come ijn...let me stand testify to ur congregation..this anxiety can kill someone

Anonymous said...

Ralu,u shall name him Joshua...don't forget...

Anonymous said...

It is well. Ur miracle is on the way.

Anonymous said...

The journey to going to conceive is not easy but His grace would be sufficient.The Good Lord that remember after 11 years would answer all those trust God for the fruit of the womb.

Anonymous said...

3 Ivf cycles done and no baby. Last one was positive but a chemical in a week, i warched as i passed my precious twins. About to pay for another two. All greyed and we still manage to baby sit for friends and family. 3 kids expected this weekend. May God answer our prayers and give us a cause to smile and laugh out with joy soon. TTC not easy...

Anonymous said...

It is well IJN amen.

Anonymous said...

I understand you babe, going through same. saving for ivf-icsi too. Low sperm count on his side and pcos on mine. Even when I ovulate like 2-3 eggs on natural cycle, no luck cos of his issue. God please may the first try be a success. 1.5m no be come chop.

OFFICIAL PRESTIGE said...

From your lips to God's ear.He will grant your heart desire.

OFFICIAL PRESTIGE said...

Amen..I am moved to tears.God is able.You will. Bear your children soon.

GlamAffairs Makeover and Tailoring. 08111024477 said...

Hey dear,I thought about you some days back. I felt God did it for you already, hence the absence.
God's got us dear and soonest he will come through for us.

I totally get you! Before, I used to avoid going to those kind of gatherings but now,just like you,I look good and put my head high. Then comes the 'na clothes and accessories you dey use your money buy'remarks and looks.
#ibelieveallwillendinpraisesoon#

Mrs Smiley said...

TTCing is a tough thing o. Sometimes I just give up, Thank God I have a supportive husband. Was told IVF is the only option I have.. uhmmm wish I got pregnant b4 marriage sef. But I won't give up, I know this year I will rejoice finally.

Anonymous said...

No heart can conceive the pain of a woman still TTC it's a pain I can never ever wish on my enemies. Lord of heaven and earth, hear our cry, hear our silent weeping, wetting the pillows with tears each night. Jehovah take away this burden and let every woman enjoy the experience of motherhood. Please answer us please, please take away this shame and stain let your mercy speak for us all that we might return with testimonies. Amen!

Hottest Chic said...

The annoying part is one pastor in my church always asks me if it has entered, I just feel like punching him in the face. Or is it people asking me wetin I dey wait. God please pick my call and receive all the Glory.

Anonymous said...

Poster, u just wrote my story up there! We are still putting money together for the next IVF. We shall surely laugh last IJN. Don't worru, stay positive

Bee10(mummytwins) said...

Baba God will surely pick our calls as for me i have a naming to attend tomorrow in fact I am going to look my best no time for sorrow in my life.
I know my testimony is sure.

Messi said...

My dear I am with u on this. Our menses wil crease with baby for d next 9months in Jesus name

Tina said...

I'm so sad and angry. For now just make conscious efforts not to dwell on it. Be happy. I know you are praying. Your positive response is on the way

BettyO said...

Just relax. Period or no period, God will do what He has to do. We will surely testify.

BettyO said...

You will laugh. It is well with you.

Olayinka A said...

Eyah I feel sad reading this an the comments too.
I got pregnant immediately I married, delivered 9 months after marriage through CS and people were behaving somehow and greeting me 'ekpele o, Eyah sorry' as if someone died. I should be thankful to God always as I have my little girl who looks like mini me. Even though things are somehow for us now, and we can't afford to go for tests as another child refused to come since four years now. I am still grateful for this little girl. My God shall give all the TTC women here beautiful babies to call them mummy.

Anonymous said...

All I can say is that am not alone...TTC is terrible# God dey

Weed Chic said...

😔

Joy Uchenna said...

Is well wit my soul. Is over six months since I had miscarriage. I am yet to see my period. Lord show me mercy nd heal me from this monster called pcos

Yemi7up said...

It is very tough,a road I wish for no woman, a road full of pains of waiting. A journey that is never your fault why you walking it. It is sad,very sad.

jelly said...

God time is the best

Anonymous said...

Don't worry...God has heard you and He will answer before the end of this year. I miscarried 6 months ago too and i know that God is still God all by himself. He will bless us all TTC sooner than we can imagine. Amen

Anonymous said...

AMEN in JESUS name

jason lawal said...

It's really a tough journey and I wish I could give you a big hug for the amazing strength and fortitude you have and still are showing-you are an inspiration and despite what u go through you are still a strong shoulder for people to lean-God won't overlook that and he will definitely reward you with a positive result the next time around in Jesus name....Amen

Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...

Advertisement