Stella Dimoko Korkus.com: Banker Tales

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Wednesday, 24 January 2018

Banker Tales

This is pure amebo gist and don’t even think you know these people. 





So I walked up behind her chair, waiting for her to authorise a transaction, it’s a busy Monday, customers were on my queue so I expect this would be a quick one so I can continue my ‘next customer please’ chant. It’s a Monday, a good day to meet nice people so I am on my best behaviour. These Bosses sometimes do not understand the urgency. The passion is not just for the work o, we fit meet husband here, interview for another job fit happen inside my 6tile cubicle. No time to waste.


I had waited two minutes and was getting impatient so I decided to look at her system, what is she doing that is more important than my transaction and my waiting customers? Then I saw the chat! I didn’t mean to snoop but if you have kept me waiting, then it’s an invite to join the party. She was chatting with Chair lady. Yepa! I cleaned my eyes again to be sure; they are chatting on and on about their last time together!! This is not whatsapp o, its office lync, office chat!!! Double hian!!!!!!!! Talking about love, real lust on an office chat. And I have been shining teeth singing ‘have a nice day sir’! ‘Have a nice day ma’! ‘Thank you for banking with us’!



This insight led to me many revelations about Chair lady. So chair lady is doing my married Boss, helping two girls from his gossip group (friends with benefits), is through with one of my colleagues, is unto one aged friend of mine and has one shy quiet contract marketer dying in silence because she loves him.


Chair lady is a guy. No, not your typical tall dark and handsome guy who is supposed to swoon you or make you drool so how he gets these sane women I admire to fall for him is a wawu. Maybe because he is ‘tested’ and ‘trusted’, the gist is that he ‘performs’ well at ‘work ’so it’s easy for everyone to want a piece of him. They say we spend 80% of our active time “inside” the bank so he tries to keep his stuff ‘inside’ the vault of whoever is ready? He is the head of a six man gossip group (the other five are females).


Chair lady wears designer clothes and walks with the confidence of a man who is a ‘high flyer’; I mean bros has the swag of a man wey sabi. What I do not understand is how Bros is always in debt. These full staff people earn good money na. Forget o, people wey dey owe still dey get swag. His pitiful stories of indebtedness led him to my friend cougar.

Cougar is a widow with responsibilities, not needs. She expects chair lady earns a good salary but was baffled by the pile of debt weighing his strong shoulders down. She knows it’s his responsibility as her relationship manager to render ‘banging’ services to her. What she did not know was that since she was on her way to becoming ‘priority customer’ private sessions come with a price. Like when you invite chair lady to ‘cum’ do cash pick up (which by the way is against banking policy), you have to grease the engine, give him something to wipe his sweat off, and boy has to smell fresh both before and after. I mean it’s always hot in Nigeria and most times chair lady cannot visit with pool car, boys on the street are not smiling. And since I do not belong to that radio station in the office, they both knew my lips would be sealed.



Before long, it was time for chair lady to get a wife, we must cover up all ends properly abi. This was a big problem. Cougar needed to approve of whatever wife material chair lady brought. There was never the right material suitable for chair. It’s either the material was too sharp, colour wasn’t perfect, the length wasn’t okay, for two whole years, they kept sorting out wife materials until chair lady convinced her that the quiet and shy contract marketer was perfect for him as she wasn’t too sharp and she was too in love to notice anything. Before we knew it souvenir don ready courtesy cougar!





33 comments:

  1. Replies
    1. You obviously can't comprehend the style of writing ...tisha oko

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    2. serious headache.... olorun o ni jฤ™ ki ori fifรณ naa pa mi.... Amin

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    3. Pretty much the same thing people say when the see your epistles @Eka

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    4. This story is such a lie!! An authoriser doesn't go to pick up any cash. I know the bank the writer works in, the hint thank you for banking with us. But you are lieing sha. The authoriser is either a bm or abm and they neither collect cash or do major marketing.

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  2. She done select wife that will look the other way when she and chairlady they do the do

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  3. This poster sabi do aproko well.............i love

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  4. Good gist but it's not easy reading your story with your style of writing. It didn't flow well and I didnt enjoy reading it. You can do better

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    Replies
    1. Yes. I had a slightly difficult time reading it. Change your style of writing.

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  5. Ameeeeeboooo๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜€๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜

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  6. I so love the way this Banker tales jist peovider/ amebo channel dishes out stories ๐Ÿ˜€

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  7. Ye!
    Them wan use shy marketer take do sacrifai!๐Ÿ˜ฐshe not knowing what lies ahead of her will be feeling so favoured at moment

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  8. I don't understand this write up pls.

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  9. this write up is for mature minds... I enjoyed reading. but why did the story end abruptly

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  10. Poster must be access bank staff, hahahahaha. I can relate. I remember my days then as a teller before the bank contracted it out to Outsourcing firms.

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  11. The shy marketer will show them her true colour once she's Mrs. Chair lady

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  12. Weldone darling! You write intelligently.

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  13. I love this style of writing,very impressive.

    LEP๐Ÿ˜›

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  14. Well done. You sabi give gist ooo and your style of writing ehnnn, i Love it. We will be waiting for the part 2.

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  15. Interesting.

    Don't stop now please.

    Minister for Enjoyment and Social Jollity

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  16. Lol. Chairlady's dick game is really tight

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  17. ๐Ÿ˜‚ Shrewd write up, only for intelligent ๐Ÿค“ amebos

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  18. Lol!
    Amebo dey sweet well well ๐Ÿคฃ
    Nice one, I am sure that the naรฏve 'wife material' will show chair lady shege when they get married.

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  19. Chaai! Ashawo for bank na 5 and 6. Please come and complete the gist. And yes! Those guys can owe like no man's business. When i was in uni I used to go to my sister's office to sell stuff. They can oooowe! Oni gbese looking fresh.

    ReplyDelete

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