The woman you marry will either help you become a better version of yourself, prosperous and increasing in substance or she'll wreck you. She is either an aid to your flight and elevation through actions, inactions or worse, indifference.
There is only one purpose to marriage as that is to bring out the best in each other. That is it. Being there for each other at all times irrespective of convenience or not. A spouse should not have and then watch as the other struggles with lack.
I'll share something that happened in the hospital when I was with my wife as she was scheduled to give birth to our third.
This couple were expecting as well and the wife was given a bed in the private ward beside my wife. It happened that after giving birth, she kept bleeding excessively and surgery had to be scheduled. The policy of the hospital is when situations become life threatening, immediate action gets taken upon a deposit.
However, the wife in question connived with the ward attendants to tell her husband that unless he goes and brings 75k, the surgery will not be done. The husband ran to pillar and post and came up short. He returned to the hospital to inform the consultant that he had no money. A baffled consultant, ordered that the woman be shipped to the surgical unit without delay. He was surprised that the operation hadn't been done hours after it was scheduled.
What did this woman do? She vehemently refused. Telling the husband that he must go and look for the money or she goes nowhere. Interventions were made, people pleaded to no avail. She stood her ground. In as much English as he could muster, the husband went round telling everyone who could listen that he had raised all he could while preparing for the baby and he had no other sources for finances. He even pleaded with the consultant to come help him talk to his wife and she agreed. The wife listened to the consultant but insisted that before she gets wheeled to the theatre, the husband must agree to go get the money.
A number of us out of concern, called the husband aside and offered to raise the money for him. Excitedly, he informed her and that's when she agreed to be wheeled into the theatre.
It wasn't long though, after several interventions, she gave up the ghost. Blood transfusions irrespective. My memory is a bit foggy on what exactly happened. Needless to say, as she was wheeled to the mortuary and her wrapper handed to her husband, he saw a huge knot in the wrapper which he loosened and out fell some money. About 120k or so. This was money the state governors wife had shared to women in the ward days before. This woman died with money that could well have paid for her surgery. Leaving a new born baby behind was not a concern to her. If I recall correctly, the husband out of anger abandoned the baby and his wife's corpse in the hospital.
A Civil defence officer years ago pointedly mentioned to me that he'd rather have a baby die when birth complications set in than touch money he had kept aside for a building project. The baby aspirated water during delivery and was rushed to the ICU. Treatment courses were expensive. And he felt he had better uses for money. As far as his wife is concerned to this day, he had no money then. It is not in my place to tell her the truth.
I could go on but I think you get the point now. It is evil to have financial resources and watch a spouse struggling. Yes I know some spouses can be irresponsible but where they can't be called to order, it should never get to a point where the lives of children born into that union, get put at risk. At the point any spouse chooses to risk the life of a child than spend money he or she has kept in hiding, isn't outright divorce better?
Too many emotionally stunted and dumb adults get married these days and that's why issues like these keep happening. Hide all the money wey you want from your spouse if him wire abi her wire no properly join but abeg make e no reach children side. They never asked to be born and each spouse has 100% responsibility for their lives.
There is only one purpose to marriage as that is to bring out the best in each other. That is it. Being there for each other at all times irrespective of convenience or not. A spouse should not have and then watch as the other struggles with lack.
I'll share something that happened in the hospital when I was with my wife as she was scheduled to give birth to our third.
This couple were expecting as well and the wife was given a bed in the private ward beside my wife. It happened that after giving birth, she kept bleeding excessively and surgery had to be scheduled. The policy of the hospital is when situations become life threatening, immediate action gets taken upon a deposit.
However, the wife in question connived with the ward attendants to tell her husband that unless he goes and brings 75k, the surgery will not be done. The husband ran to pillar and post and came up short. He returned to the hospital to inform the consultant that he had no money. A baffled consultant, ordered that the woman be shipped to the surgical unit without delay. He was surprised that the operation hadn't been done hours after it was scheduled.
What did this woman do? She vehemently refused. Telling the husband that he must go and look for the money or she goes nowhere. Interventions were made, people pleaded to no avail. She stood her ground. In as much English as he could muster, the husband went round telling everyone who could listen that he had raised all he could while preparing for the baby and he had no other sources for finances. He even pleaded with the consultant to come help him talk to his wife and she agreed. The wife listened to the consultant but insisted that before she gets wheeled to the theatre, the husband must agree to go get the money.
A number of us out of concern, called the husband aside and offered to raise the money for him. Excitedly, he informed her and that's when she agreed to be wheeled into the theatre.
It wasn't long though, after several interventions, she gave up the ghost. Blood transfusions irrespective. My memory is a bit foggy on what exactly happened. Needless to say, as she was wheeled to the mortuary and her wrapper handed to her husband, he saw a huge knot in the wrapper which he loosened and out fell some money. About 120k or so. This was money the state governors wife had shared to women in the ward days before. This woman died with money that could well have paid for her surgery. Leaving a new born baby behind was not a concern to her. If I recall correctly, the husband out of anger abandoned the baby and his wife's corpse in the hospital.
A Civil defence officer years ago pointedly mentioned to me that he'd rather have a baby die when birth complications set in than touch money he had kept aside for a building project. The baby aspirated water during delivery and was rushed to the ICU. Treatment courses were expensive. And he felt he had better uses for money. As far as his wife is concerned to this day, he had no money then. It is not in my place to tell her the truth.
I could go on but I think you get the point now. It is evil to have financial resources and watch a spouse struggling. Yes I know some spouses can be irresponsible but where they can't be called to order, it should never get to a point where the lives of children born into that union, get put at risk. At the point any spouse chooses to risk the life of a child than spend money he or she has kept in hiding, isn't outright divorce better?
Too many emotionally stunted and dumb adults get married these days and that's why issues like these keep happening. Hide all the money wey you want from your spouse if him wire abi her wire no properly join but abeg make e no reach children side. They never asked to be born and each spouse has 100% responsibility for their lives.
Women need to stop managing inferior men into relationships and marriage
ReplyDeleteWomen only have the number of children you can take care of , stop gambling with your lives
15:07
DeleteIs the write up there open to only one sided interpretations? Empty vessels like you make loud noises.
Sad read but your advice is valid.
ReplyDeleteWe should choose our partners carefully.
This happens more often than ppl think, in all kind of ways. Some folks have wired themselves to hold on to their money for dear life and only spend what belong to others. Even with feeding, some ppl will live on garri night and day instead of purchasing wholesome food with nutritional quality.
ReplyDeleteI know someone who when he was arrested told the police he had no money for bail. He was ready to disturb others. Well, you have to empty your pockets before being locked up. When his pockets were emptied the money to post bail plus more was eight there. He would have used other ppl’s money and not repay it on compassionate grounds and keep his own nicely stashed away. Humans are a specie like no other. The love of money is the root of all evil.
Well stated Doged👌🏻
ReplyDeleteRemembering the quote on Marriage that says "Marriage is like a Parcel, you dont know what's Inside until you unwrap it. May God keep upholding genuine marriages .