''My Husband Has 'Erectile Dysfunction' And My Libido Is 100 Percent

Stella,I read your post about young ladies getting married to older men.
I actually wanted to make an imput but restrained because my case is not completely in line with the issues under discussion.

My problem is this: I got married to my husband (who is 15yrs older than me) at the age of 21yrs.
Apart from the sexual abuses I suffered as a child, I had consensual sex twice as a teenager with the only boyfriend I had before I got married and so I was totally inexperienced about sex.

As I got married, having sex with my husband became an issue as I was neither able to meet his sexual demand nor satisfy him in bed. Sex became a problem and he had to get his urge satisfied outside without my knowledge. I was sort of relieved when he was no longer pestering me for sex every night.

I finally got to know about his other alternatives which he resorted to for over 9yrs of our marital life when I checked the text messages in his phone.

To say I was devasted was an understatement. I WAS SHATTERED! I however confronted him and he admitted to having extramarital affairs to satisfy his high sexhal urge as he was not getting the satisfaction from me.

After crying my eyes out, I then begged him  to teach me how to enjoy sex and love making as it doesn't appeal to me. (REMEMBER: I WAS RAPED AND SEXUALLY ABUSED AS A CHILD -HE IS NOT AWARE OF IT, THOUGH).

He bought porn movies (blue films) for me to watch and also get aroused most times to make it easier for me. From there, I also got the courage to teach him what turns me on. (WE DIDNT DATE BEFORE MARRIAGE).

With these, I develop interest in sex and began to enjoy it as well. Infact it came to a point that I am always the one who initiates our love making. I have become addicted to it without watching porn movies.l urge has so dropped that he hardly has erection. Infact to put it better, the reverse is now the case.

I have complained severally and seriously to him and he couldn't help the situation. Sometime ago, he told me to get a reliable person I can be having extramarital sex with but warned that I should ensure I keep it secret. I actually thought he was joking but when he emphasised it again, I cried so badly. How can I be married and be sleeping with another man? What respect will I have when people see me indulging in this act? These questions and more worried me till I fell into the very thing I detested.

I was pushed to have extramarital affair with ANOTHER MARRIED MAN! Not just having the affair, I fell deeply IN LOVE with him! Our sex was so fantastic and superb that I couldn't help but think of him all the time.

I knew what I was doing with him was morally and spiritually wrong but I couldn't help it. My conscience worried me alot that I decided to call it quits. I still find myself calling, texting  and talking dirty with him.

It's been difficult for me coping because at home, sex is rarely obtainable! My husband now 54yrs is having what doctors referred to as 'Erectile Dysfunction'. I am 39yrs, sexually healthy and lacking adequate sex. PLEASE, WHAT DO I DO? 

 

*faints*