Stella Dimoko Korkus.com: Saturday Laughs Is An Early Bird Today.

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Saturday, April 30, 2016

Saturday Laughs Is An Early Bird Today.


LMAO....I am gonna be extra careful from today ooooh...have a nice laugh day!






I actually meant it as it is...LIMONADE but went back to put inverted commas when you all thought i made a mistake..Limonade is also same thing as Lemonade






























































































HAHAHAAHAHHAHAHAAHHAHAAHAHAHAHAHA CHOI



















ASK A NIGERIAN POLITICIAN WHAT THEY THINK ABOUT THIS HOT WEATHER CONDITION

Journalist: what are your thoughts on this heat Nigerians are complaining about and what  is the government doing about it:

RESPONSES:
LAI MOHAMMED: this is the result of PDP’s misrule, they stole the ozone layer.

FEMI ADESINA:  Mr.  President promised us change and that includes change in temperature. CHANGE IS HERE, EMBRACE IT.

AKINWUMI AMBODE: We have signed a $10million deal with LG to install air conditioners across the Lagos skyline.

IBE KACHUKWU:  I assure you the heat will disappear by 2pm 29th May.

BUKOLA SARAKI: Tinubu wanted the heat to be more than this but i opposed him, out of my love for Nigeria and that is why they are witch-hunting me.

GOODLUCK JONATHAN: This heat was not this bad when I left office/power but Nigerians did not appreciate me.

ADAMS OSHIMOLE: Ngozi Okonjo-Iweala stole the N100 billion meant for temperature control Research.

NASIR ELRUFAI: We are in talks with General Electric to see how they can generate power for Kaduna from the heat.

RAUF AREGBESOLA: I have just approved payment of January salary so that Osun workers can buy hand fan.

ALIKO DANGOTE: Next week, we are commissioning the Dangote Fan Factory; by 2030 Australia will be buying fans from us.

BEN MURRAY-BRUCE: *tweets* when Naira is weak and inflation is high automatically there will be heat. This is common sense.

NGOZI OKONJO-IWEALA: Under the last administration there was no political will to address climatic change:


PRESIDENT BUHARI:  From USA ... this  heat is kwarupt because Nigeria is kwarupt and I will fight  every form of kwaruption involved and responsible for this heat and every kwarupt heat will go to jail.


hope i did north west ya time?


148 comments:

  1. Lol, saturday laugh is a early bird today? And u want to be careful today? Stella i hail oo

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. SDKB gbagauns ti take over. Everyone should proof read before clicking on publish henceforth. Except ur gbagaun is original.

      Delete
    2. Munching gbaguans is the koko abeg.

      Delete
    3. Sorry for your loose Blockbrity comment cracked me up real bad!!

      Delete
    4. Bwahahahahahaha.! Today's IHN is funnest..Hahhahahahaha..

      Pls what can someone do to have bastard money? If u say hardwork i will block u!

      Kwakwakwakwakwakwa!

      Delete
    5. Awwwwwwwww
      Stell I didn't gbagaun but I went to tell my Benin neighbours that their Oba is dead, only for them to look me with sideye are u just knowing*

      I had fun laughing, especially the Nigerian Politician response

      Kwakwakwakwa

      Delete
    6. @lilly simple, royal "highest" is what?

      Delete
    7. *Today's Laughs....

      Abeg make una no use my gbagaun for next week's laugh.

      Delete
    8. Akpu - cassava
      Akwu - palm kernel.

      Delete
  2. Now that stupid olubunmi has made it clear that a majority of ppl that go anon to cuss out the igbos and now claim to be igbos are actually not igbos.

    Useless girl. Dey ur lane ok, no come dey claim tribe wey no be ur own, just to make a point.

    The laughs were funny today. Especially the banky w own

    ReplyDelete
  3. Lol. The errors we all make while commenting though...
    Thanks for sharing Stella.

    Your comment will be visible after approval.

    ReplyDelete
  4. Lmao 😁
    The gbagauns made my day

    Don Davido,I miss your laughs

    ReplyDelete
  5. Hahahhahaa @ chronicle..... I even got the spelling of Ambassador wrong, chai

    ReplyDelete
  6. Is 'a' early bird? I hope you do your kids homework in german and not English

    ReplyDelete
  7. 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

    883 comment 2016

    ReplyDelete
  8. Banky and Teebliss joke is so funny. I can only picture it. 😃😁😂

    ReplyDelete
  9. Dat weather condition/politicians joke...nice

    ReplyDelete
  10. Lmao @ what is a gbagun. Lol

    ReplyDelete
  11. Just look at how they littered everywhere with gbagauns. The normal laughs were funny but just too few. Pls let's scrap this gbagaun thing abeg.

    Is it not enough to just type gbagaun under their comments, abi ewo lo si gan

    ReplyDelete
  12. The last joke tho, I was gonna skip it, so glad I didn't. Kikikikikikikiki

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I actually skipped it. Just came back and read it and I was laughing so hard. But really, that's what each person's reply would be like.. 😂😂😂😂

      Delete
  13. The gbagaun had to be highlighted so that those with brain can easily decipher,but the olodos still won't understand. Smh.

    ReplyDelete
  14. Hahahahahahahahahahahahah, laff don tear my belle. Bv's are the bomb. This is so hilarious, but seriously that person looking for German Shepherd #16k, na fairly used you need?. Crazy. Stella you did north west my time o jare, I lagged all through.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. U sef don gbagaun. U lagged??? Na jet lag? PROOF READ

      Delete
  15. Lmao,you did north west our time. Conscious of writing mood activated

    ReplyDelete
  16. Chai!!!!!!
    Bv's can gbagun 4 Africa.
    Oge nsimah,ur gbagun is getting too much.......kindly enrol in a night school.
    4 other "gbagunarian" it is well.
    4 that stupid anonymous on my case,see how God disgraced u????

    ReplyDelete
  17. Portable viv, is been very careful dis days. Lol. She no follow 4 today laff.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Please kindly go back to school!
      U can't even write well.....see what u just typed up there.
      Illiterate!!!!!!!!
      "Is been very careful indeed"

      Delete
  18. James deserves an award...

    ReplyDelete
  19. No, you didn't *west* my time. We are really paying for sunlight in Naija.

    ReplyDelete
  20. You wasted mine. Scrap those munches please and bring us real laughs. We can read their gbagauns from the comment section. Saturday and Sunday laughs are becoming boring

    ReplyDelete
  21. Incomplete without my BAE PORTABLE VIV

    WHERE ARE YOU DEAR? Didn't see your comment yersterday.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. And you have to use my picture???
      Please do me a favour and remove my pics..........and am not joking about it.

      Delete
    2. Ideato,y are you using potable's picture?
      Is not right, or better still use ur own picture
      What low self esteem is causing. .

      Delete
    3. Kikikiki portable is a celebrity and I am promoting her brand

      Delete
  22. The responses got me rolling on the floor. And james and co, una weldone. Lmao!!!!!

    ReplyDelete
  23. Hahahaha...of course u did NORTH WEST my tym.

    ReplyDelete
  24. The funny comments made me roll on the floor with laughter. Despite these gbaguns making it to laughs, the same set of people will still make comments without reading it through thereby making sat and sun laughs easier to compose by Stella.

    ReplyDelete
  25. Lmao omo told own funny,,,,u all writing nonsense

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Did u read d one u just wrote? Kettle calling pot black. Madam judgina

      Delete
  26. Kristine, it's 'your comment HAS been'...lmao. Funny how your own gbagaun is automatically up there too.

    Insulating kwa? Lwkmd.

    Congregations to you, indeed.

    Choi, my time wasn't 'wested' o.

    These days, na to proof read, double check, critically access, before posting.

    *screens my comments *

    Okay, no typo. Hits publish.

    #WhiteDiamondOut

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. *assess*
      You no screen your comment well, madam.

      Delete
    2. @white diamond..😄😄😄😄.d thing tire me o...my people usually say"Bekee bu agbara" we go dey try our best sha and welcome to d club of gbaguans"access"😄😄😄

      Delete
  27. Looool very funny
    Only one I didn't find funny was the insult to Linda (queen and boss) that shouldn't have been posted here. That comment shouldn't even have been enabled

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Rip to your dad "blockbrity". Richbee I hail.

      Delete
    2. Stella abeg continue to dey munch.

      Some of our regulars don dey proof read before them post comment. Nice one. Na only James no wan learn.

      Delete
  28. Lmao @ Buhari and English language.
    I think it will be better if he speaks only in hausa language

    ReplyDelete
  29. @Richiee, Blockrity???

    OMG. This is serious. Lol

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. See James dey laugh person fa? Same you??? James BOMB!! You wey sabi shell like empty canisters dey laugh person?? Hehehehehe We're truly in the end times 😂

      Delete
  30. I HEREBY DECLARE JAMES

    THE HOD OF SATURDAY LAUGHS AND

    THE CHAIRMAN OF SDK BVS ENGLISH SHOOTERS ASSOCIATION.

    "CONGREGATION"(AS WRITTEN BY JAMES) BRO.

    ReplyDelete
  31. @Stefly.....
    Only sprayers???
    LMBO

    ReplyDelete
  32. Shantelle's Empire30 April 2016 at 11:07

    I have a request to make.
    Fan emmanuel can you pls type in english? You comment like you are having your village august meeting on here in all post.
    Xp and linda eze sometimes type in Igbo but its always 80% english and 20% Igbo. Which is a bit better,atleast we understand most part of their msg.
    How can you come on a world wide web and be typing your kparapko all the time? This is not a nigerian 'native' language blog.
    Just imagine stella makes post in her dialect(Isoko/urhobo/german),will you understand a thing or be able to comment?
    To think you are laughing @ adeniji bisi,atleast we can make something out of his gbagaun.
    You make comments and leave one totally lost. That is not communication. So not cool.

    All i'm saying is type english make non-Igbo's like me dey understand your comments. Thank you!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. You want her to make Saturday laugh? She no sabi english.

      Delete
    2. Sis i would have accepted your plea but why did you refer to my language as kparapko? That kparakpo alone emebisigonu ife nile! On a lighter note,oburo ife nile zuru na afia ka iga ama Okay? Nwanyi oma

      Delete
    3. Lafool the miserable witch, you've been running your ill bred tongue since my birthday as if you're sad to see me alive. I would have waited for your own birthday post but that will be a pretty long wait cos apes do not celebrate their birthday.
      Get ready for my 2017 day to day pictures cos Fan Emmanuel do NOT leave a fake life! Only if you'll be alive till then cos sad people do not live long.
      Ajegunle brought up feeling funky!
      And if you think that bashing will drive me out from SDK😁 Onya gi amata nkapi!
      Fan Emmanuel have come to your mother's blog to leave/stay.You better start getting use to it cos you have NO option!
      Dunno why am replying a dejected peasant

      Delete
    4. 'do NOT Leave a fake life?
      Sigh!
      You know what never mind

      Delete
    5. You wish to be like me right @fan Emmanuel? I just went back to your birthday post, dirty thing.

      You that was crying for popularity on a blog and you're comparing yourself with me? Wonders........ Abeg go wash your dirty body.

      Ask those that are on my bbm contact/whatsapp here,how I look and ask those that I've patronised here, where I live. You wish to be like me right? Just be good and God will answer your prayer.

      Delete
    6. @fan emmanuel chill kparakpo is not an insult, it's like a local term for native language.

      Delete
    7. I wish to be like a lonely gwez? God forbid!
      Stop hyping your frustrated self,you are nothing but a piece of trash.Nne umunwoke jigi apass ball, inwerodi value.Nkirinka akwa di ka gi? Empty vessel makes the loudest noise.
      Moron!

      Delete
    8. 'You that was crying for popularity '...Hehehehehe.

      Delete
    9. Hahahhahaha..

      @teacherks comment!!

      Una no go kill me for this blog abeg..

      @fan Emma. Why wish someone else death. This is just a blog nne chillaz

      Delete
    10. Shantell I don laff tire for ur comment. Very local thing.....

      Delete
    11. When I talk say you no sabi english, you dey vex.

      Which one be "do not leave a fake life" and "leave/stay". Abeg go back to school or continue using kparakpor.

      Delete
    12. Choi Choi Choi.

      Just passing by

      Dalukwanu

      Delete
    13. Lafool scram to blazes and never return.Bitter and Senseless sombori! Ipku GP tank

      Delete
    14. Dirty fan Emmanuel, I'm young,single and happy. If na your type of husband wey dirty like you I wan marry, I for don marry at age 19. Frustrated dirty house wife.

      I get your time today.

      Delete
  33. LMAOO O°˚˚˚° @ 'God Bless Don Me!!!!! Chai....oh! #wipestears# ah! Can't stop laughing

    ReplyDelete
  34. Stella,you just made my day,please let Saturday laughs come early,its good to laugh out loud in the morning and make all this white people wonder why you are so happy!!!!Always check your sentence before you post oh or else?????

    ReplyDelete
  35. This is how people go anon and claim they are Igbo or yoruba spewing so much venom to make the other tribe seem bad. At the end, say by the way, I'm Igbo... See how the one above forgot to go anon. With a full yoruba name, you are from. Anambra. Jisike


    Imagine the number that would have succeed in clicking anon just to give wrong info on other people or tribe.. That's how I saw another anon comment thay said how her sister married Igbo blah blah blah and the way she started the story, you wouldn't expect her to end it with by the way I'm Igbo but that gave her away. I just knew it was another liar trying to make another tribe do that. And I'm sure people do it for other tribes too. I see all those comments and I know immediately they are from lairs

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. U know this,olubunmi hope u have seen how u exposed ursef?? Hypocrites everywhere.

      Delete
  36. I laughed real hard, oh James please get a dictionary already, when I saw ur comment karmaisabitch I knew it would appear here, same as Larry, but flakkie's reply summed it up.
    This will help us all proof read and be more careful.

    ReplyDelete
  37. Hahahahaha not at all Stella.

    ReplyDelete
  38. God! I had a very good laugh, thanks madam Korkus for making my morning! Well done

    ReplyDelete
  39. Funny Saturday laughs... can't stop laughing. .

    ReplyDelete
  40. Lol @ olubunmi"I am anambra" @ flakkie chris its possible na..
    I have an urhobo name and surname, but I'm anambra.its not always black and white..
    But you could also be right about not switching to anon mode..

    Stells, keep 'em gbagauns coming, its fun fun fun! Lol

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. She's no Igbo. She just one of those that go anon and say trash so it would look like igbos are against themselves or aren't United or are bad

      Delete
    2. My dear, you may be the exception. But don't forget she claimed to be married to an hausa muslim. Wetin come do her surname? In short na wazobia lie she tell for there. Her stringing all 3 major tribes in one comment was no small feat 😂😂

      Delete
  41. Hahahahahahahahhaa... I don laff scatter. Too funny. Esp the last one abt politicians and heat.. lol
    Nigerians are soo talented. How do u guys come up with such thoughts.. lmao.

    ReplyDelete
  42. Hahahahaha. Today's laugh is sooo funny!!

    Weldone SDK.

    ReplyDelete
  43. Kwakwakwkakwa 😂😂😂😁😁😁😃😃

    ReplyDelete
  44. Hahahahahaha all this gbaguan for here alone? sdk and follow members of gbaguan cooperative society, thank you for giving me a good laugh.

    Make una kwantinue o, more Grace.

    ReplyDelete
  45. Lol at the replies for hot weather condition.

    ReplyDelete
  46. See me laughing loud in my room and my roommates are wondering what's wrong with me.
    The 'gbagauns' are hilarious
    Good morning everyone

    ReplyDelete
  47. i just they imagine money maker aka James marry Vivian aka portable.... nekede vs Ansu graduates, omo their children go worst pass Patrick...... James and Vivian i throway cap for una.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hahahahaha. . Choi, Sir Patoski AKA Patrick, AKA Grammarian, AKA Confused fella don suffer for your hand to compare am to James and Portable.... lmao

      Delete
  48. James you in for ride on SDK... Clinton and Dino cracked me up

    ReplyDelete
  49. lmao......thank God my gbagaun did not make it this week.

    ReplyDelete
  50. lmao......thank God my gbagaun did not make it this week.

    ReplyDelete
  51. Kikikikiki English nor easy abeg.

    ReplyDelete
  52. I laughed so hard that people were staring at me! This is another best of the best laughs. Sdkers rock! Nigerians are so funny!

    ReplyDelete
  53. I meant to write 25k- 30k ring. Oloriburuku Lucille, adin agbon lo ma ta ku. Omo ale. Like you have a man that will ever engage you, you for dey sell wosiwosi ?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Epe re Ooo. Lucile won't even understand what you wrote. Sorry

      Delete
    2. And you want to to engage a woman!?
      *spits on you!

      I just pity the unfortunate girl

      Delete
  54. I meant to write 25k- 30k ring. Oloriburuku Lucille, adin agbon lo ma ta ku. Omo ale. Like you have a man that will ever engage you, you for dey sell wosiwosi ?

    ReplyDelete
  55. Kikikikki
    I enjoyed the typos/gbagaun than the memes

    ReplyDelete
  56. Time not "wested" I laugh tire.

    ReplyDelete
  57. Dis is so funny especially d first and d laugh. D last one got me choking with laughter. It's Epic!!!

    ReplyDelete
  58. I laughed well 2day. Thanks 4 making me smile.

    ReplyDelete
  59. Dryyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy



    Where did my sense of humor migrate to? Whew!

    ReplyDelete
  60. Shantelle's Empire30 April 2016 at 12:51

    Abeg Ideal ilaje blood what did you write on portable's picture. Its very tiny on my screen,som1 click and tell me biko.

    ReplyDelete
  61. I love you Stella....thanks for putting a smile on my face and trust me...you did "North West" my time o

    ReplyDelete
  62. See the silly james that was correcting my 'marriage' autocorrect.
    Ewu mbutu.
    Buhahhahahahhahahahahahahahaha

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Ah!!! Temi, that your own cracked me up BIG time, I had to pause to get some air...chai james finished u O°˚˚˚° !

      Delete
  63. Shantelle's Empire30 April 2016 at 13:45

    Lmao @ La fresh.
    Fan emmanuel say what!?? Type english please. To me you aint communicating.

    Btw,kparakpo is 'Lang' right?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Communicating?? Why are you so interested in my comments? Have i ever referred to you?
      Ina aza present na ife na agbasarogi,onye asiri!

      Delete
  64. Lol. you didn't waste mine o...my mum was constantly asking me why I was laughing like a mad woman. Lol. You will walk! That killed me.

    ReplyDelete
  65. Nice! I had a good laugh!!! What a pleasant way to start my Saturday.

    **that free spirited chick that loves LOVE****

    ReplyDelete
  66. Nice! I had a good laugh!!! What a pleasant way to start my Saturday.

    **that free spirited chic that loves LOVE****

    ReplyDelete
  67. Lol...very funny

    ReplyDelete
  68. Shantelle's Empire30 April 2016 at 21:35

    Fan emmanuel why the insults? A simple comment and you turned the laugh post into a war zone.
    Next time i will scroll pass okay? No vex.

    ReplyDelete

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