Stella Dimoko Korkus.com: Chronicle Of Blog Visitor Narrative....

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Monday, January 15, 2018

Chronicle Of Blog Visitor Narrative....

Some women are not fit to be called ''Mama''






STAND ALONE NARRATIVE

ADVICE NEEDED ON HOW TO HANDLE A NON EXISTENT MOTHER


Stella, I have a burning issue in my heart and i need to share to get opinion of BVs. We all have stories to tell in our life's journey. Am a lady who has gone through so much in life. Family rejection, marital turbulence, childlessness


Mother had me out of wedlock. According to her, she tried everything possible to get rid of the pregnancy but i refused to be evacuated. When she finally had me, she dumped me with her brother's wife in the village, as she did not want people to know she had a child. 


She later got married, had a comfortable life in the city. Had children for the man. Meanwhile, her brother's wife was maltreating me back in the village. She did not care. Another brother of hers seeing the maltreatment smuggled me back to her. She was not particularly happy with this move. She hated me,told me not to call her mum but "Aunty" This is what i called her till i entered secondary school then her husband i used 'Sir" for, suddenly told me to start calling him "Daddy" So i did.

That was when she changed her mind and told me to use mummy for her. I used it reluctantly and sparingly.


I was never close to mother. Infact, i was treated as a househelp. Always using hateful words, so i was mostly in the hostel, dreaded going home on holidays as she used to beat me mercilessly at the slightest provocation. Calling me "bastard", that i have come to replace the position of the man's first child. 


Throughout my duration of 5 years in boarding house, she never visited even on visiting days. I was a depressed child in secondary school. I used to lie that my parents live abroad.

Unfortunately, their marriage crashed when i was about gaining admission into University. When i went to ask the man for Jamb fee, he bluntly told me he was not my father and that i should leave his house. By this time, mother had moved out of the house without letting any of us the children know her new place. Life became hell for us. The man was not particularly a homely type.Big womaniser. No money, no food in the house,so his children starved. I left and started fending for myself to go to school. Did sales girl in a supermarket. Neither the man nor mother ever looked for me till i graduated. None of them existed in my mind or life. To God be the glory, Got a good job immediately after NYSC.


The man remarried but had many children from 4 other women. About 16 altogether. Funny enough, am the only graduate, working and doing well. My younger ones were sent parking. One killed self. One missing till today, over 25 years now.Another, stated having children from 15years and around 18yrs with 3 children with nobody claiming any. That is the only one with her now, no basic education. 

Mother was less concerned about the welfare of these children claiming her salary cannot carter for children. Is like she sends her to mortgage her body. How else do i explain the shameful act?

She retired with good parkage as a middle management staff but misused her benefit and so living in Penury in old age. Surviving on meager pension. Throughout the period she was working ,never looked for me.

She cut off from family at the age of 17. All her siblings dead. So no family affiliation.I dont have contact with any cousin. 

On 1st January, she finally called and surprisingly the first thing she asked was if am working. I was taken aback. I refused to answer. I only said" Today is 1st, i only want to thank God for my life, God is in control"" she said ok.

The issue is as she is over 70, no money, no family, no house, nobody to turn to, the issue of who will bury her comes up. Where she will be buried. I understand she is looking up to me to build house for her now. Hence that question of whether I am working.

I am worried cause i don't want to disclose anything about myself to her and am concerned about telling her i don't have a job when in actuall sense am working. My job is my lifewire i cant use negative words about. Am not in any position to build house nor am i willing to stress myself financially. If she knows am working, omg! She will be demanding so much. She wont allow me rest.

What are the opinion of BVs on this as her sole aim of looking for me now is because she is counting her days. I intend paying her a visit soon. I am gathering what i will give to her plus a bag of rice but still contemplating on what to tell her about work.
BVs please, learn your voices on this. What should i tell her concerning my means of livelihood. Am worried too about the burden of burying her when she is finally called. As it seems the responsibility will be solely on me Hence unwillingness to disclose work. Not sure any known family member has my detail. Even the baby factory in the house does not relate with me.



*OMG,what a family?What a history!!..when you intend to marry,there will be nobody to invite as Family...so sad!!

You dont need to tell her anything...Just keep saying ''God is in control''..or speak in tongues any time she asks you..LOL

You dont need to be friends with her,just do what you need to do as a child and leave.....

70 comments:

  1. Romans 12:17 Do not repay anyone evil for evil. Be careful to do what is right in the eyes of everyone. 18 If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone. 19 Do not take revenge, my dear friends, but leave room for God’s wrath, for it is written: “It is mine to avenge; I will repay,”[d] says the Lord. 20 On the contrary:

    “If your enemy is hungry, feed him;
    if he is thirsty, give him something to drink.
    In doing this, you will heap burning coals on his head.”[e]

    21 Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I just dey look this your comment like lucozade and belive me it doesn't answer the question she asked.
      Did you read the place where she said she's gathering foodstuffs for her including a bag of rice? Does an unforgiving heart do that? Is that one not feeding the so called enemy?
      She's worried about unnecessary burdens like building a house for the woman and letting her know that she has a paying job an you're here quoting...if your enemy is hungry feed her 😩
      Poster...have you built your own house? Do you have landed property? If no...build nada for her. You need solid investments in life more than her so take care of You first before any woman who contributed nothing to your life.
      She asks about the job again, tell her that you are hustling to keep body and soul together and that you never even reach you where you can afford to actualize dreams...which in reality you have not so there's no lie in that; cos if we all reach where we want to financially na Dangote we go dey rub shoulders with.
      Once in a while send food stuffs to her and keep it like that. She shouldn't come visiting either and whenever she dies, go to the local church, pay up the dues so that they can perform the burial rites and buy a space in the cemetery finish. Thereby cutting off long throat elders and what not that will want to capitalize on her burial to drain you.
      A good man will come calling and shower you with the love you never experienced in life.

      Delete
    2. Repentance and forgiveness work hand in hand. Your mum dosent sound repentant, hence no need for any form of forgiveness.

      Just do her some good occasionally, foodstuffs, some little money. Don't give over the moon as u may regret it later.

      When she passes, get a cemetery space, pay the bill and bury her quietly in the city. Reduce cost and move on with your life.

      Hadey Halaba.

      Delete
    3. @Ralu
      You chose to read the scriptures and make it complex in your mind. If she with a cheerful heart gives what she has proposed in her heart to the woman, she has done her duty as a Christian. She must not build a house for her. That scripture is crystal clear and that was why I did not want to comment on it; "as much as lies within you . . .", that's the key word.

      1 Timothy 6:8 But if we have food and clothing, we will be content with that.

      The woman must not own a house, she can pay rent.

      Delete
    4. Poster listen to Ralu M and take only that advice, if I may add don't go visiting after this talk to her on phone alone and that is only if she calls.

      Delete
    5. Dear poster if you were like me you would know that there's nothing to worry about here
      Visit her not
      Send her not
      When she dies the one she kept with her will bury her,you will go as guest and move on with life
      If you like go ahead and do good Samaritan and you will see the pit waiting for you to fall into
      That burden you felt you offloaded will come back with extra weight.
      Please do come back and tell us the continuous decision you made.

      Delete
    6. Just tell her you are still hustling.

      Delete
  2. I don't even know what to say but whatever it is, your mother is still your mother. You habe dome well for yourself. This is a messed up family which only God can rectify. Since you know she would demand tell her that you are very jobless.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Cemetery still exist in Nigeria. Don't bother about building a house but a portion of a cemetery for her burial with pastor or Alfa as an officiating officer..
      She shall reap the loneliness she sowed in her youth.

      Delete
  3. She want to reap where she did not sow?..
    Poster,take it at the back of your mind that you don't have a mother!...
    Infact,if people ask you,tell them you are an orphan!...
    This is someone that told you to start calling her aunty!..
    Hian...
    She is your aunty oh as far as I'm concerned!...
    Change your number biko!.
    You don't need such a person in your life!...
    Some people will come here preaching forgiveness...as if they would forgive if they are in your shoes!...

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. She even called her bastard. End time mother. Tufia

      Delete
    2. As far as I am concerned , the Queen and Boss gives sound advice. Thumbs up

      Delete
    3. Pls stay away from that woman. She birthed you doesn't really make her your mother. She evil. Imagine telling u to call her aunty and calling u a bastard. Don't let her know anything about you. Stop picking her calla and as linda said if possible change ur number. She is bad news. There is nothing like forgiveness here

      Delete
  4. my advice is very similar to SDK's own, the famous red ink. Do not listen to those that will say if you do not tell her it is a sin bla bla bla. Give her what you want to give her , do not bear grudges towards her. When she dies where she will be buried will be taken care of. Pele.

    ReplyDelete
  5. Why stress yourself with going to visit her? Let me tell you, women like that are expert manipulators. She will cry, lie, give excuses about everything that happened and end up making you feel guilty about your feelings towards her. If I were you, I wouldn't bother going to see her, rather, gather food stuff and other basic provisions and waybill to her. Let her live the rest of her life in regret. If na burial, Shebi we no get relatives again? Na to buy plot bury her for public cemetery when she die.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Poster, please 'listen' to this advice. Do not visit her. She will manipulate you and make you feel guilty. Waybill the items to her and change your number if possible. Forgiving her doesn't mean becoming best friends. Be wise.

      Delete
    2. Just like kikki said,there is no point going to see her,she doesn't deserve it,she never played any motherly role in your life,my grandma opened account with the closest bank to us in the village,let her do same,send her money through her account,buy all the food stuffs you want to give her and send it down,and never tell her anything about your income,if she dies,cemetery is available,on your wedding day invite your colleagues or sdk crew or better Still go get married quietly in the registry,is not the crowd you invite to your wedding,that will make your marriage successful,please be careful.

      Delete
  6. Na wa o. Just when you think you have read it all... But why are some women like this? People are looking for children while others don't care about their own children. It is well o.

    ReplyDelete
  7. sad story..women wicked oh..have always said it.
    dont know what to say to you poster..just forgive and dp your best fpr your mum in your own way..

    ReplyDelete
  8. Na wa for some mother sha,dunno what to say jare

    ReplyDelete
  9. Forgive and forget whatever wrong she has done, you are a living being today cos she brought you into these world no matter the circumstances concerning how she conceive or treat you after birth. Your heaven is at your mother's feet, don't let her step on it.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. You are a very wicked person for typing this advice.

      Delete
    2. Anon 15.14 kindly shut up. Stupid talk.

      Delete
    3. The bible ask us to be wise as a serpent. Do you know the character of a serpent? Bia poster don't mind them. Don't go and visit her. If she had succeeded in aborting you will she call a dead foetus? Please forget her and focus on building your future.

      Delete
  10. hmmmmmmm. Before you go and meet her in the village, commit your journey in God's hands and also ask God to give you words to speak to her. Be wise in your answer to her. Just tell her you thank God Almighty for the control in your life.

    Na wa for this type of family seems village people really enter una well. It is well. Keep praying to God to take charge of everything.

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  11. I agree with what Stella has said, try as much as you can to evade any question that has to do with you I.e where you work, if you're in a relationship, etc. Please jeep saying God is in control and have you ever wondered why you're the only one who progressed? Forgive her, send her things when you can but I'd really have lived to say you shouldn't have any contact with her directly. All the best#TrustNoOne

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  12. @Poster;if the answer you would give to her is a problem;then you dont have a problem Dear..

    Where i grew up;all business men,civil servants etc when asked how far with them or business or what they are doing;they will simply answer with "JEHOVAH WU EZE" meaning God is the King..

    That answer rounds it up! So tell her "God is the King" or "God is faithful" or "God is our Shepherd" or "God is good" or "Our hope is in God"...

    Case closed! Then you can always do whatever you are moved to do for her as the spirit leads...

    Remember not every question needs an answer or perhaps a direct answer;and its never a crime protecting your territory with a golden private life..

    The more human-beings know about you;the bigger the Risk,envy,jealousy and Expectations..

    Good-luck!!

    @MARTINS ABOY

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I love this reply. Just tell her God is good. He promised to be with us always and that, you get your daily benefit from God. Do what you can do and leave the rest. Do not forget to pray about anything you want to do for her. When she finally dies, uhm!!!, poster, just get a good casket for her , and bury her jejely. I don't believe in incurring debts cos of burial ceremony. Low key burial pls. Do what you can do and move on.
      Above all, please forgive her while she's alive. That might draw her to God before she dies. I believe that will be a good gift. All the best poster

      Delete
  13. Don't visit her. Ask for her bank account. Go to the bank and put money for her. Move on with your life

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  14. See my fellow person wey our mama reject. Thank GOD for my step mom. My dear use wisdom on her. For over 27 yrs I haven't seen my real mama

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Which one is real mama?
      For the fact that you are thanking God for your step mom, that is your mother. The other woman is a surrogate simple! Better face the woman that loves you and forget the ones that don't matter.

      Delete
  15. This is so sad. I don't know what to say.

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  16. Wow... The Lord is your strength oo... Just answer her questions with another story when she asks..be very diplomatic... May God help you

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  17. Lol; the speak in tongue aspect got me. Poster you don't need to tell her anything but please forgive her. You sound bitter and it won't help you. Anytime she asks if you are working just tell her You will take care of her the best way you can". Please make sure you take care of her well just like you will want your children to do to you for vengeance is not yours but the Lord's. All the best and God bless.

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  18. Please forgive and do what you can for her,show her that you are a better person than her.

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  19. Poster. you can bury her if u want as she is your mum.
    BUT you dont need to spend big money. just buy a casket and call a pastor say your prayers and move on shikena. Do what is easy for you my dear. last last if people come for the burial do meatpie and coke period.

    you can bury her back in the village.

    take care

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Person never die and you people are already talking about her burial.@ 70years old she can still live over another 20years oo and become 90yrs.you people should stop this burial you are arranging for her already pls.""" poster your mother wasn't a good mother,and I feel sorry for what you and your other siblings went through.its all your mum's fault but pls for the love of GOD send what you can afford to her so she can feed,never let her go hungry and try as much as possible to avoid going to see her if you can.

      Delete
  20. Dear poster, just do the needful and don't answer her questions, let your respon be thank God or bless God.

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  21. The Bible says we should honor our parents, so I will not say you should neglect her. But I can assure you that you do not owe her any information about yourself. Let her know that in as much as you will try to provide for her in your own little way, she has no business with your personal life. Don't hesitate to be blunt with her, after all, she never spared your feelings while you were young. And she better not give you any rules on how she should be buried when she dies! Buy casket, buy burial slot at the cemetery and bury her. Don't tell her where you work! Intact don't tell her your educational qualification sef. She doesn't deserve to know. Selfish and heartless woman.

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  22. My advice is every word Stella has said. I just want to be kind today, let me not say what is in my mind.

    You even try, you are in even in contact with her. Mtshewww. Let me control my tounge even though my tounge is wrestling with my mouth to speak.

    ReplyDelete
  23. Poster, you have to forgive. Your mother although it's hard. But don't disclose any vital information of yours to her. If it's possible give her the food stuff and money through someone. Keep your distance from them to avoid envy. There are cementaries where you can bury the dead. Some women sha.

    ReplyDelete
  24. Poster don't tell her what u are doing. Don't tell her anything about your life. Just give her the necessary things, don't even stay long with her, highest 20mins, u leave.

    As for her death, Jesus said leave the dead to bury themselves. She is no longer married, doesn't have in-laws, so there's no need for a big burial( at least if u are Igbo). So u can either go n bury her in her father's compound with few kinsmen and umuada or u bury her in a burial ground. That shouldn't bother you for now, when u reach d bridge, u cross it.

    ReplyDelete
  25. Dear poster when you go give her the stuffs, when she asks you about your job do not tell her the truth. From time to time send her little stuffs relate with her from afar, do not pay back evil for evil. Continue to send her little stuffs until she passes. When she does just no need for ceremony. Someone who did not live well no need for celebration. Just bury her quietly, that's all you owe her.

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  26. Must you go der. Send someone to give the witch the rice. Lolz

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  27. Poster just answer with wisdom when she ask about ur job. U must not answer in the affirmative or total no. U can use words like God is faithful, God is our provider etc. And pls don't overdo ur spending on her.

    ReplyDelete
  28. Very heartless,selfcentered,selfish and wicked woman.This one is a mother from hell,not fit to be called a mother chukwu a ajuu.
    Poster tell her nada,if you want to send her money,send peanuts into her account and I mean PEANUTS.Its now in her old age she has nothing and no one else she remembered you.If she still had money,poster she would NEVER have remembered you nor contacted you,wicked soul.
    If she was ma mum haaaaa,she's gonna be on her own,rubbish.
    #I'M ANGRY#

    ReplyDelete
  29. Poster u can forgive but i doubt you ll ever forget. No one should ever be made to go through what you went to. Now my advice, i do not truly believe shes remorseful, buy clothes, foodstuff and whatever it is you can afford and send somebody to her. You do not need to see her, a mum capable of such wickedness might have arranges jazz to use on u. Thats my 2 kobo. Jst take her calls wen u can n dont borrow for her sake. I m sorry but shes not worth it

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  30. poster she is still ur mom no matter what. Jux forgive her bcos God has already fgt ur battle. It is well with you.

    ReplyDelete
  31. Dear poster, for your Mum to be 70 years, I guess you are up to 40. There are something's that age, maturity and experience supposed to teach us in this life. Don't write anybody off, no matter what. Forgive your mother, help her and your sisters children also, so that they won't write another chronicle tomorrow about how their wicked rich Aunty abandon them. Leave vengeance for God. It's a pity you are here thinking of how you would bury a woman that is still alive. Death is not only for old people remember.
    You have a family please embrace them no matter what. Forgive and forget no matter their attitude.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. E be like say u and poster's mother dey attend d same coven together else how would u render such useless advise: for her to absorb toxic people into a life she's still trying to fix!
      Please use ur head and not ur emotions when dealing with persons with this kind of mentality.

      Delete
    2. Why not give your own advice and get lost. MUMU

      Delete
    3. Trust me your d real MUMU, next to none. At first u wanted to sound like a good person now look at ur reply, very revealing.
      Dishing advise that ur very self cannot practise. Just zip it next time.
      Every sane person has literally typed the best advise I could have offered d poster so I came to rebuke this one insane advise.

      Delete
  32. Forgive her. You do so for yourself. Relate but tread carefully and wisely too. Take and send foodstuffs to her. Do not ever feel pressured. You might want to avoid giving her money.

    ReplyDelete
  33. This is so very sad. I'm filled with pity for all you've been through. If not for Christianity eh? Some people deserve be relegated to the depths of our minds and hearts never to be remembered ever again. But for God's mercy and grace...

    Remain kind to her despite her evil and wickedness towards you. It is only God that will keep blessing you. Pay her the visit and heed the advice of most BVs to NOT disclose your work details no matter how hard she pushes to know. Forgiveness is the right thing to do and it shows strength of character, however, if it were me, I would forgive her AFTER I have given her a piece of my mind regarding how she treated me in a way that will reduce her to tears.

    At the end of the day, she is also a victim like you are. She couldn't give what she never had. It will never justify her actions though because you didnt turn out like her which means you are the better one.

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  34. If you want to visit her please wear something simple,not flashy. Never reveal too much to her no matter how much she pushes you. You are not young because you mentioned her age, you should be at least 35. Do you know your biological father? If you're not married yet, your uncle can stand in as father for you. But that your mother has mind o... What kind of life is that... What a pity! Even if she wants to reconcile the damage has been done.

    ReplyDelete
  35. Lady T/ am worth more than a thousand dollars15 January 2018 at 17:38

    Dear poster, please be very careful. Some people go to check spiritually what you have or are capable of. so better pray and ask the Lord to shield you that she won't see you to assess what you are worth.
    Please, be careful.

    ReplyDelete
  36. Dear poster, see you are stressing yourself for no reason whatsoever! This woman wants something from you hence why she’s calling. Give her what you want to give her, if I was you sef I’ll send someone to deliver the items, because once she sees you she will manipulate you and you may be at her mercy, don’t let her take advantage of you please. You have come a long way considering you’re upbringing and I pray God leads you upwards always. Good-luck with the egg donator/womb...she is who she is!

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  37. Dear Poster,this is really sad, really sad, she hasn't done well as a mother but you know what don't use evil to pay evil please i beg of you. No matter what,she is still your mother nothing can change that . please find a place in your heart to forgive her i beg of you if not for anything but for the love of God who sent his only begotten son to die for me, for you,for her and everyone of us on earth, please forgive her, treat her well as a mother, show her her love, please listen to my advise i beg of you, it is all for your benefit,leave her for God i beg you in the name of God.
    Go and visit her, buy her good stuff,pray for her, i know it's going to be hard but pleaseee do it for the love of Christ. Make peace with her and be in contact with her,just try please try, you never know when death will come calling on her, is it that time you will wish you forgave her or showed her love even she wronged you badly. please my dear leave her to God.No man can harm you cos God is solidly behind you, for you to come this far,it is not man but God's doing, that you tell her you have a job doesn't mean you will loose your sense of reasoning and give her on her every demand,No, you give as you are capable of giving but please don't neglect her,don't treat her.Let her know that truly there is God cos i;m sure she is regretting her action but she can't turn the hand of time. Now the child that was despise is now the only hope she has left for her. I know it is hard but find a place in your heart to forgive her. You are not an ordinary child, you are child of destiny and you will fulfill destiny and nobody,i repeat nobody can ever harm you not even your mother so have that at the back of your mind cos God is your refuge.

    Matthew 21:42
    The stone the builders rejected has become the cornerstone. This is from the Lord, and it is marvelous in our eyes' ?

    Reach out to her,bless her, tell her you forgive her cos if you carry this grudge in you, it will hinder you. I pray the holy spirit direct you more on what to do. You can call on the Holy spirit for wisdom and also direction on how to go about this but please forgive her,embrace her and show her love. God bless you immensely.

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  38. I really thank all who took out tiMe to read my story and offer advice. I read all the advise with tears in my eyes.
    Some questions have been posed back to me: 1.Yes am over 35. I have a personal house and landed property. I will go see her end of the month and will pray over the money i will give to her. Before then i must have sent all the item i want to give to her cos i will go by air very light. I dont know her place. she said she has just moved into a new rented selfcontained. I dont intend to pass the night in her house. Probably hotel. I know this too will not go down welk with her.

    I have not told her yet of my impending visit. I intend to go with someone. I called her over the weekend. When i enquired about the 18 year old baby factory(last born) she said someone faraway came to take her as househelp to be paying just 7k monthly to mother, not even to the girl. I was shocked how she could release that girl judging from her own age and health. Who will assist her in house chores?

    How can a 70 year old woman live alone, sweeping, washing fetching water etc all by herself? I feel for her. I asked about the babies she said she returned them to their respective fathers. But i doubt if she has access to their fathers. I guess she must have sold those kids.
    I had made enquiries if there is a public cemetary in her village. Was told none. She is the only surviving child. And She has never been welcome in her fathers compound.
    Am really trying to put the pass behind so i can recieve the blessings from God. I dont want hindrance to my progress.

    God bless all of you for your heartfelt advice. And to you Stella, you crack me up with the speaking in tongues aspect.
    Am still in tears reading all.

    ReplyDelete
  39. My Dear,

    My advise to you is, she has offended you so much but inorder to free yourself from emancipation of mental burden or slavery. Your Mother  ‎is your mother and she's irreplaceable no matter how sad or ugly this might sounds or look.

    If I have the opportunity to turn back the hands of time, my dear I will but she's no more, (may gentle soul rest in peace).

    Forgive and thou will be forgiven says the scripture vs 37 but read Luke 6 vs 30 - 38 ‎to connect the message.

    You must find a way to let go your anger for her wrong, but be peace as dove and wise as serpent. Do the best you can, get closer to the extent she will be remorseful for her actions. Learn to forgive easily, that's why we human being "in progress" not perfect.

    When others tell you their Epistle, you will know yours isn't worse despite what you've experienced.

    I will also add to it that make her happy for the time she has is short, atleast her virtue as mother can still be used for prayers and blessings‎. Take her out for picnics, beach, cinemas, Chinese Restaurant etc.

    This will make her know that scripture of you have been fulfilled. The stone the builder reject has now become the head stone of the corner" you're her first born right? 

    These are my opinions and suggestions. God bless you real good for sharing because this will help someone, somewhere, somehow!

    SKY... 



    ReplyDelete
  40. Let me explain something to you. Listen very carefully.

    If you had no money, your 'mother' would have no use for you and wouldn't have contacted you. In other words you are as useful as what you are literally bringing to the table, or in this instance, to her pocket.

    Secondly, a mother/father is beyond the person who provided sperm and eggs, it takes love, mentorship, support, care, provision, protection, correction etc all of which you have lacked.

    'Mother/Father' is a role.

    Not an honorary title.

    Lots of people have it twisted. Sometimes strangers show us more care than family.

    Thirdly, an Uncle, friend etc can represent parents when you want to get married, that's the least of your issues. Pray for a man blessed immeasurably by God who only wants to see you happy and fulfilled. That's the important thing.
    Me? I've learnt to only place value on those who place value on me. I learnt the hard way.

    Anything less, either family or friend, I burn that morrafokkin bridge to ashes.

    ReplyDelete
  41. Stay away from her you can give her money but don’t let them know anything about you. If she feels you don’t do enough she will start to evil about you . May negative words not manifest in your life. Don’t bother about burial when she dies just buy coffin and bury her the next day. Marriage too just go to the registry and look for good church members to stand as family. GOD be with you.

    ReplyDelete
  42. Amen & Amen. to all your prayers . May God never let us encounter what we can not handle. May help come our ways even in the midst of storm. Even when human forsake us, may God never forsake us.And may the stones which the builders rejected be the corner stones.

    God bless you all. Am a little bit relieved with all the advise. Very emmotional. God will take me there and bring me back safely, give me wisdom to handle the situation & guard my utterances.

    Once again, God bless you all!!!

    ReplyDelete
  43. Please transfer to her account...do not give cash...a word is enough for the wise.

    ReplyDelete
  44. Do not giver her cash do not give her cash open an account and put it there. Do not go and see her send the food stuff and tell her to open account so you put money there. Do not tell her about your job say you are hustling.

    You will not miss your blessing if you do as I wrote. My sister do not go and see her or give her cash. Tell her to get a house help and you will be paying it.


    A word is enough for the wise

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Please take this advice!!!!

      I won't say more than that

      Delete
  45. From my little understanding ur a married woman and I pray God to intervene and sort out all ur marital issues, blessing you with twins this year. Ur mum is very wicked and heartless from your narration. I advice u to follow what
    Anonymous16 January 2018 at 01:52 said. Do not even employ someone that can take care of her bcos it will be a burden to you rather look for someone u trust and send the person with the items to give to her for now. If you must got in person, u should be mindful of the time u will spend with her and avoid being too emotional with her bcos I am sure she will shed crocodile tears when she sees you. Finally bring her should not worry u bcos God has am way of doing things. BE STRONG

    ReplyDelete
  46. The truth is,she knows you are financially buoyant,she is only looking for a way to manipulate you and I pray you wouldn't regret ever travelling to see her,I ll advise you seek God's instruction with 3 days fasting before you go visit.you will get a Revelation if you need to go or not.There is something about your mum,how come all her children are nothing to write home about despite being a civil servant with an exposure

    ReplyDelete

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