A drama played out a few days ago and the Nigerian man says his wife is mad and wants her out..she says she isnt mad and also details how he had been beating her.....
I don't know how or where it goes wrong but when it does,it gets so bad that the men are arrested and the women are taken away to sheltered homes and given the Opportunity to start new lives...
Are you one of those living in sheltered homes?what happened and how did you get there?
Are you one of the Nigerian men whose Nigerian wife reported and got a new life?what really happened?
In Germany,Domestic Violence is not something joked with,if there is any evidence that your spouse or partner was abused,IT IS OVER whether you like it or not and then you head to Jail..
Are the Nigerian women right to approach the Authorities for help?re they over dramatising?taking advantage of a Country where the law works?
What is your story if you are one of these wives or these men?
It is well with all. Let me hear what they will say.
ReplyDeleteJust that the world we are in is a wicked world devoid of God's love
Men are very bitter animals. When women begin to fight back or dump them after going through hell with them they begin to cry victim. Stupid shameless men who think they can treat women like slaves.
DeleteI'm gonna sit back,relax and read comments.
ReplyDeleteOf course
DeleteOverdramatising so that they can end up alone looking after their children? Which woman deliberately wants that for herself
ReplyDeleteNow Nigerian men can see how they treat women in Nigeria is not accepted in Western countries and they cannot deal with it. They will always blame women for their actions, no woman deliberately wants a broken marriage or to raise her children alone but these men think they are Gods and women are slaves that are there to serve them 24/7’and tolorate their crsp. Not anymore,, if women are evil and causing men problems then men should stay the hell away from women. Is it by force for men to be with women.
DeleteThat's why they don't live in Western countries. Conversely, Western men should see that the way they treat women is not how it is in Nigeria.
DeleteSee ehn, when a lot more Naija girls/women especially, know what's good for them, nobody go tell blind man say, war don start. Why do you think, the oxymorons are always clamping down on Chimamanda Adichie, and even co-opting many gullible and dimwitted women, to work against even their own best interests? The day most Naija learn to take a stand against rubbish and stand for something meaningful for self and unborn children, from their men, is when things will start changing for the better. Until then, good luck!
Delete21:04, your head dey there!!!
DeleteI had a friend that was beaten everyday! Like seriously beaten and the man brought her but never filed for her. So he was always threatening to deport her and take the child from her. She had to enter shelter to get her papers or the man’s mother would have taken her son with her to Nigeria and she would never see him again. I advised her to report to child services and run for her life. Even her oyinbo neighbors don report them taya because she was always being beaten like a thief. So many people who cannot find wives abroad have serious issues. If the Nigerian girls abroad reject them, you better see that as a warning signal. Except maybe he was your boyfriend before he travelled. So many things this woman went through that if I talk about it, this page go full.
ReplyDeleteCome and full this page, isnt that the purpose of this post?
DeleteMy friend wanted to hook me up with a friend of her husband that is based Italy. Her own husband is based in US while she is here. They are all Edo while I'm Yoruba.
ReplyDeleteWhen I heard the guys resume. Divorcee,2 kids and 45yrs. Note that I am 32. I told my friend im not interested i don't like abroad husband as I had bad experience in the past. Then I asked how did the wife leave. They said she left when she was pregnant with the 2nd child.
I said hmmmmmm what is the real reason. For the wife to leave while
Pregnant. Nigerian women hardly leave when they have one child then pregnant with another. They said it's because she now has her papers so she feels she doesn't need the man again. I found it somehow.
But as they started abusing me I'm too picky why i am still single .
I said okay,give him my number.
He started calling,chatting me every moment of the day. I saw he seemed possesive.
If I don't quickly answer is call or I go out and get home late he would say who have i gone out to fuck. All sorts.
I never saw this guy with my two eyes but we would fight daily on phone. Want to know my movement. He will ask me for nude pics I will say No. He will not talk to me for days.
Bevees me I gave up, I block him everywhere. Then he started stalking me calling me on private no all sorts. It's a long story
Long and short be careful of all these so called 40s and 50s divorcee men living in the abroad. Most times there is a reason why the wife left.
My Dear God will give you a good husband,don't rush anything oo
DeleteTalk your own. People like you are quick to bash divorceee men. I married one with 2 kids,and am having the best time of my life. He brought me to the USA and has shown me the definition of true love. December is our 8 year anniversary. I gave him 2 more kids. We are in love like kilode. The first wife left because she was a gold digger, got her papers and left him for her Nigerian boyfriend (they got married and it crashed in a year Karma is a bad bitch) i love my husband to death..committed, loving and any woman's dream...i keep wondering why the first wife left. My husband is a good man..
DeleteGod saved you! I leave in the abroad! Glad you saw the signs and ran. Any one who asks for a nude photograph of a woman he wants to wife is sick. You ask when you have no good and pure intentions. Women beware of those who want to do sex video chat, as they can record it. If you are married and in a sensible relationship by all means you can do wild things, be careful still
DeleteAnon 17:02 you are just an irritant! Your man just decided to change cos some men actually change after messing up their first marriage. Or you are just lieing about him treating you well. If he was good to his first wife there is no way she would have left, get over your self and stop bn stupid!
DeleteAnon 23:02, God is faithful. Good news irritates you. God save your soul. Am blessed with a sweet marriage. Choke on your hate. My husband is an excellent one!!
DeleteI live in the states and most Nigerian women here are corrupt; I mean CORRUPTED MORALS. I do not associate with them at all.
ReplyDeleteThe story I am telling here isn't different from the common things on ground. A girl I know very well in Naija finished SSCE and was imported by a man who has toiled over 25 years to build a life; gone to school, citizen (well that is a story for another day; the way Nigerians get citizenship here. By the way I came here through US Immigration program). So this man of course like most Nigerians does not want to marry "akata" (this is their derogatory word for black Americans, I heard it is a Yoruba word, can someone explain please).. . So the man asked his people at home to arrange a homely girl and this girl was imported. She joined the Naija women clique. The man enrolled her in a nursing program and paid for it. After she got a job and was earning more that the man. They already had kids. The very submissive girl became insolent and definition of trouble. Cooked up DV story against the husband and he was booted out of his own house, loitered on the streets for months to a year before he could find his feet. Meanwhile, the girls brothers are coming here importing used cars to Naija and living "big" on a man's suffering.
The best thing that can happen to any Nigerian man abroad is NEVER to marry an imported Naija woman, except those that began with you and you know personally.
Akata in Yoruba means or refers to African Americans.
DeleteSo wetin "dog" come be in Yoruba?
DeleteDo Yorubas have African American in their language?
Yes they do that is why it is called language. Don’t try to compare the Yoruba language to yours because it is incomparable. You will find that Yorubas have a word for almost everything in their language. Why do you think people like you cannot make a complete sentence without a Yoruba word in it
DeleteAkata is a derogatory slang used in reference to a single lady who is considered advanced in age and experience
DeleteIt’s good for him, he wanted a mumu, he should have seen her character but because he was looking for sharp sharp. This is why couples should date, stop importing young women from Nigeria like goods for sale. He had worked for 25 years and yet married an ss2 drop out, rubbish
DeleteAkatas are not good, it’s even better to marry all these Mexicans and armanians ... very accommodating and business savvy people
In Yoruba Language, Akata means FOX!
DeleteHowever, in this case it is most especially used for Afro American women by Nigerians.
Anon 14:18, as it happened to that man, it has happened to many women in the past however, not all women or men is bad vice versa.
Our men here will treat white women with respect and even tell you that you know they don’t tolerate stuff, but once they marry naija, they will start their Nigerian lord of the manor rubbish, expecting to be worshipped and glorified when the environment empowers both gender. It’s good it’s happening to them cos they think they are so wise by going to Nigeria to pick naive young women with the hope they can bring them here and abuse and control them.
DeleteAnd by the way, that girl did not cook up DV stories against the man. We already know men like that. A lot of them have killed their wives in this America because they believe they own their wives just because they brought them to America and sponsored them in nursing school. They’ll start controlling how they move, take their paychecks, tell them what they can and cannot do etc while those men sit at home watching Yv and reading newspaper, waiting for slave wives to bring their paychecks home. Even the kids are expected to be taken care of by the same wives when they get home after long grueling hours at work. What kind of life is that? If the embassy knew those women were going to the us for domestic, sexual and financial slavery; I’m sure they would not have allowed the women in to start with. He’s not even ashamed to admit that he worked for 25yrs and a school dropout he invited started making more than him after a few years? Was it because he thought he could use another human being financially just because he brought her in? Not to talk of the sex and the domestic chores. Even if she gets a loan to pay for her nursing school, she would have paid it up with interest within a few years without the slavery and bondage. This example is not about meant avoiding girls from Nigeria, it’s a lesson to men to stop seeing women as property. If you love her, then help her workout expecting her to be in bondage or enslaving her
Deleteanon22.09 you have said it all ....how come after 25 years someone else who came yesterday earns more than you..why did he not send himself to nursing school?
DeleteI made it.........
ReplyDeleteI made it....
I am happy I am haaaaaaaaapy
Took months of practise , my life have finally change for better .
Things have fall in pleasant places for me ..
I will bring gist later .. Okbye.
Congrats dear. Am already happy for u. Can’t wait for your gist
DeleteWaiting for the loooooooong maybe interesting story.
DeleteThat word “imported” though...
ReplyDeleteCan you imagine, my thoughts exactly and how do the women deprive the men of their livelihood, the fellow “importer” did not say. Or is his livelihood the money the women go out to work for and if the man can’t get his hands on the money/ his livelihood he starts beating the woman.
DeleteHow else you wan make she describe am?
DeletePersin wey you never see, you never know her character,
Na so dem go order and she gets packaged and put in a plane fiam.
In fact, na imported package! Problem be say them plenti rotten.
Truth is, there are real decent men and women of Naija extraction both @ home and abroad. Question is: where are they and how does one meet them? No matter what, the decent ones are by far and large, fewer than the evil, controlling, manipulative, narcissistic and crooked ones, though.
ReplyDeleteCan you imagine a much older Naija man, calling immigration to deport a young girl, who simply refused his romantic advances? Can you picture a group of low-esteem and just wicked Naija men, supporting each other, to blackmail and exterminate, the lives of ambitious, hardworking and smart, Naija women, who dumped their sorry behinds, after discovering most of them already had wives/children back home in Naija but pretended to be single in the USA? Shall one go on about the countless, inhumane and monstrous atrocities that these Naija men (aka:"beasts") perpetuate against otherwise, innocent women in foreign lands? Bottom line, if you know what's good for your life ehn, run forty-forty, from the first signs from these "beasts" whenever/wherever you see them. Aaagh, if you know, you know.
Haba. Where all our abroadian beevees go today naw? Una dey leave in anonymous mode? Make una no leave this gist for local Naija people like us wey no know where MM2 dey abeg. Eka Joy and those wey don cross border go pity us sometimes bring sweet abroad gist now, una go dey para say una follow dey inside Titanic ship when e capsize. Me I want to learn o. You people should comment with una IDs in case learners like me get further questions. Na beg I dey beg una.
ReplyDeleteThere are good cases and bad. Mostly bad. Do your homework. Many guys that go to Naija to find wife can't find wife abroad because the girls know them well. Some refuse to hold down a job. Others have slept with half of Africa. The trouble usually comes when the girl joins them and realizes the money he showered them during his trip took him two years to save and he doesn't have money. If you come, have your plan for how you'll make a living. If he wants to pay for nursing school, encourage him to go as well so that tomorrow now, he won't be putting eye in your money
DeleteI am non-Nigerian who lives in the abroad and African men in general have a stigma with domestic violence. None of my friends are interested in dating any African men whether Nigerian or from anywhere else because of the abuse stigma attached to them. In truth, domestic violence crosses every cultural and economic lines, even well educated men can be abusive. There are many cultures in Europe where the men are well known for being very abusive. This is one of the reasons feminism has to exist, because even in North America a little less than 200 yrs ago it was legal for a man to beat his wife. I honestly believe that the reason for all of this is because of a male identified God, until God is labelled as a deity with both male and female energy, both a mother and father, men will continue to believe they are superior to women.
ReplyDeleteHmmmmmmm
DeleteThis will make an interesting read.
ReplyDeleteSo this my in-law has this friend that sells used funiture and used household items in Festac.
ReplyDeleteSo this guy is always so bitter and angry, he said he brought his wife to US and paid for her to study pharmacy, when she graduated and started working, she was making $8k a month. But that she changed and stopped doing her wifely duties, she won’t cook or clean when she comes back from work, meanwhile he wasn’t working anymore cos he wants to enjoy the fruits of his Labour so he stopped the taxi driving he was doing before that it’s too stressful and his wife’s earning is big enough. Mind you he will stay home all day while she goes to work on some long shift, then when she comes back he will balance and be waiting for her to cook and clean and take care of the home cos he is an African man and can’t do those stuff according to our culture.
So my in-law and him use to blast women and I asked my in-law if in our culture women are bread winners and he didn’t answer me.
Our men here are wicked, if you see how they treat white women when they date them, then once they start dating or marrying fellow Nigerian they will remember that we are Africans and our culture allows them to misbehave and expects you to turn slave.
In my own case I came here for school and I get introduced to some of them from time to time, they will be abusing Nigerian women all the time, talking about bringing someone here and making themcitizen as if they are giving the person life, they feel entitled to cheat, use, disrespect and exhibit all manner of entitled behavior when dating a Nigerian.
And funny thing is most of them no reach! I said it. I was working in Nigeria before I came here for my masters and I can tell you that most of these guys playing God cos they live ‘in the abroad’ no go even reach if they were in Nigeria. Very timid arrogant lot feeling like god cos they have us papers. If you even see how they abuse Nigerian women you won’t want to have anything to do with them.
God bless you,anon 20.10!! People are abusing women here don't know what they're saying. I live here and have seen terrible instances, live, of naija men,with serious inferiority complex,who don't have anything to their name,maltreating women who came from naija, just because dem no get papers. Abeg, I nor fit type. If ANY man in the U.S toasts you, run for your life!!!
DeleteDivorced and single. I am loving life. Anything a wife can do, a gf can do better. I already bought a grave. So no family members wahala. I am enjoying all there is in life. Most importantly, peace of mind. If marriage works for you, by all means go ahead.
ReplyDelete20:11 I like your style,only ill add be sure youve made peace with your creator so you enjoy peace here and after here...but still open your mind to possibilities..love can happen at any age..true love that is!
DeleteThe fact is that, most Nigerian men that are not married ”in the abroad”, are very uselesss, entitled bunch of idiots and extremely dumb, with useless odours.
ReplyDeleteI don’t know why people restrict themselves. Girls enjoy your lives and explore. Forget the bunch of fools that think they are God’s gift to women.
Even some married ones sef are the same
DeleteAfter several observations, the fact is, Naijas, irrespective of gender, except for few, are simply: deceitful, jealous, manipulative and evil. The same mindset, including moral decadence, that led to a complete break down of law and order back home, is the same that's exported to Europe/USA/UK. Should you make an attempt, to stand up for what's right in their midst, they turn around and put their coats on you, as it were. You may be luckier to get a non-Naija to help quench your thirst in a desert, without inhumane conditions. Yet, 99.9% of the time, just to help a female Naija get a job in abroad, Naija man will want to fuck your brains out, in spite of abilities /qualifications. Do the same men ask to see their fellow men in the oza room too? Infact, the more educated a woman is, the more they seek to rubbish and diminish her accomplishments. Where do these types of evil and monstrous men come from again? Nigeria.
ReplyDeleteMost abroad men are lazy and they turn their wives to slaves.
ReplyDeleteYou lie!
DeleteI am a single Igbo man...never been married,no kids and in my late 30s.I studied abroad and work here,have my own mortgage(two bed apartment- rented one room out) as two rooms is too much for me. I am paying my bills and looking after myself with the little money I make.Not every black guy is useless.A lot like me set out to lay solid foundations for themselves here.
To every single naija man, going home to look for a bride/wife is bullshit and waste of money.If you find a woman whereever you are,MARRY HER.She doesn't have to be a naija woman.
As a man, You set yourself up for a serious heartbreak that you may not recover from if you IMPORT a naija woman abroad.It's damn too expensive and can't be guranteed especially with a woman who hasn't been abroad before.
Men,if you find a good woman..either white or black where you are, by all means MARRY HER.There are other down to earth ladies from Ethiopia,Rwanda,South Sudan et al who are loyal,respectful and ready to go all the way with you.Why travel back home to marry a woman you don't know?
I WILL NEVER take the risk of importing any girl from naija.I am better off with the one I see here....at least she understands the hustle.
A lot of at home men are already like that too. They just hide behind “culture” while they pile all responsibilities on their wives. It is the same attitude they took to the abroad.
DeleteAnd at almost 40,unku, you still haven't seen ba?
DeleteIn the western world,not everyone is desperate to look for a wo/man to jump into marriage with!Some do very well on thier own..30,40,50 whenever it happens,it happens.And if it doesn't,they are still happy living their best lives as single independent wo/men.
DeleteMarriage is over- rated.
Seperate two kids enjoying my life the abuse I went through only God knows my ex cheats like a mad Dog can have sex with any thing can’t explain how many times I have to treat my self of infection because Oga no fit keep to him self but what I don’t understand is while an African man will leave their wives to go and be leaving with other women but would still want to be sleeping with ex wife and want ex wife to cook for them in my case if I don’t do he is not interested in seeing his children except I do what he wants cook for him and give him sex.
ReplyDeleteSeperated with two kids enjoying my life the abuse I went through only God knows my ex cheats like a mad Dog can have sex with any thing can’t explain how many times I have to treat my self of infection because Oga no fit keep to him self but what I don’t understand is while an African man will leave their wives to go and be leaving with other women but would still want to be sleeping with ex wife and want ex wife to cook for them in my case if I don’t do he is not interested in seeing his children except I do what he wants cook for him and give him sex.
ReplyDeleteSo you couldn't even use punctuation while writing. So bad of you. And you stay abroad o.
DeleteThen let him not see his children nau
DeleteDon’t let inferiority complex kill you oh, madam. Upon say a god has liberated you, you still de cook and sex a useless man...
Is it not his kids? You no know say you go file for court say him no de come see d kids? Say make dem Conor de visitation rights pata pata abi, you still want am?
All the women are angels. Case closed.
ReplyDeleteLolzzz
DeleteIt's difficult to find love here
ReplyDelete