Stella Dimoko Korkus.com: Chronicle Of Blog Visitor Narrative...

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Tuesday, November 06, 2018

Chronicle Of Blog Visitor Narrative...

Hmmmmm,na wah oh....What is this?





STAND ALONE NARRATIVE
LIVING IN A HOUSE OF COMMOTION:


Please guys, I need help. I really don't know how to handle this anymore. I am going to be as truthful as possible. Whatever u read here is as it is. I will not try to paint anyone as they are not.


This is about my immediate elder brother and his wife. I don't know why these people want to send my mum to her early grave.

Let me start from somewhere. Back in 2013 or so, my brother impregnated a lady he was dating. When he told my mum, my mum being the extremely gentle, no trouble woman that she is asked to see the girl. She told her how we are just managing the little we have as we are not a rich family but we have a house. She asked her if she's OK and can manage with us. She said she would.



 My brother already had the master bedroom (the one with inbuilt bathroom and toilet). So she moved in with us. I think everything was quite fine until she gave birth to a boy. My God, it became from one problem to the other. She was constantly complaining of my brother's broke state. My mum seeing that this wasn't her fault, she would try her possible best to provide the basics. She paid for childbirth. We all contributed towards the naming ceremony. My siblings and I will go out and buy things like pampers, clothes, foods for the baby just so she doesn't feel the lack from my brother. But it was never enough. She would quarrel and quarrel until one day my brother beat her.


My mum was so angry, I was so angry that even though she was at fault, the fact that he hit her made him guilty. I remember my mum took her time lecturing my brother on why he should never ever hit a woman. She asked him if he's ever seen our dad hit her. She told him the repercussions and all that. I didn't fail to include mine. I even practically insulted him in the process. My mum told him that if she's insulting him too much that he should just walk away and let him cool off.


Just to avoid all these unnecessary fights due to finance since my useless brother has decided not to find any work to do but to sit and drink with riff-raffs in the area, my mum and I over stepped up. When the son started school, I even chose and still do till date to buy books just to lessen the financial stress. I would buy all the books and all they have to do is raise the school fees between themselves.



One thing about this lady is her hustling spirit. God, I've never seen a woman so hard working. She would farm, she would go to her small job, late in the night, she'd go pick snail to sell. Frankly, if not for her uncouth mouth, she's a very lovable person. Apart from her fight with my brother, she's never had issues with anyone of us. We live together peacefully. We even share shoes and clothes, that's how well we interact.

I can't begin to count how much we do for my brother just so we could help fill the financial void. We buy the foodstuff, the food to cook, gotv sub, nepa bill etc. There's no house bill on them. We just handle everything and just plead with her that it would eventually be fine.


Once they have any quarrel, she'd take the boy and leave to her 'sister's' place. Sister is in quote cos they are not actually sisters but from the same village but they are really close. My nephew's first birthday, I practically used all the money in my account to make it possible cos she wanted it and I didn't want it leading to quarrel between my bro and I. Once there's a financial issue, my mum and I would step up just to please her and avoid fights but no fight must happen.


My brother even stopped staying at home because he says he can't spend 10mins alone with her without her fighting about something. I am elaborating on all the things we do so u see how much we try to fill in for my brother.

I remember a day I had a friend around and they started their usual hassle. My brother as usual tried to walk away from the situation but she held his shirt by the neck really tight while hitting him. It took my friend and I a lot of stress to separate them just so that my brother would leave and wouldn't have to hit her.

She got pregnant again and gave birth to my adorable niece. As usual my mum paid for the hospital bill and we all contributed to a comfortable naming ceremony. Her first birthday, I emptied my account (this is not an exaggeration) to make it possible.



So to my issue now. I went out earlier in the day and came back to meet her 'sister' who has been staying with us for a while now due to some financial issues (my family is very accommodating). I met her outside and was immediately worried that maybe someone had made her feel unwanted in the house. So I stopped and asked her what the problem was. She told me that my brother and his wife were fighting(traditional wedding was eventually done last month). She had been complaining that she didn't feel comfortable living with a man that had not paid her bride price so my mum ( God bless that woman) gathered all she had with support from my dad. They even ended up borrowing and went to do trad.

So apparently they had just had a fight because she said my brother was with a girl at the place he was drinking, a girl that also comes there to drink and one thing led to another and they were already exchanging words and as my bro made to leave as my mum had taught him, she grabbed onto him and started hitting him. At this point my brother fought back and now she has a cut on her face my brother doesn't know how it happened.


I have been so pissed at my brother for not just resisting enough to walk away as usual cos now there's an injury anyone would hold on to.

I told him he could have avoided this by just sitting at home. But he said he can't do this cos sitting at home is another cause for quarrel as she would find something to quarrel about.

The reason her sister was sitting outside was cos she tried to calm her down and told her afterall he wasn't the only one with the girl as there were many people drinking there but she turned on her and said she was supporting my brother.

All this quarrel was in front of their a year and 2 months old daughter who my mum told me was just screaming and crying as they were fighting and quarreling. It's my mum that has been sick all day that still tried desperately to separate them.

After the whole show, the daughter needed her and kept going to her but she kept shoving this girl away. I had to go and start apologising and pleading for her to just let go. She didn't even look up to look at me. I kept begging her to take the child and at least attend to her. She didn't answer. I left and the girl went to her but she shoved her aside and she started crying again. I had to go and keep begging her as the girl won't go with anyone else. Eventually, she collected the girl and I left.

Shortly after, my niece came to me by herself. I think she knew somehow that her mum didn't want her at that moment. It broke my heart when I saw her walking back to me looking sleepy. Did she really have to extend the anger towards her girl.

I'm typing this tonight (yesterday night) and as I type, my niece is sleeping beside me, spending the night in my room (except she comes for her). Something that she has never done before. Are they not already using their stupidity to affect my niece's life???? Thank God my nephew was asleep all through.



I don't know what to do. When does it end??? How else do we help with this? I am crying typing this. Are we not trying enough by trying to breach the financial gap? My mum is always settling quarrels after quarrels but this night is just worse cos he hit her again, several years after the advice my mum gave him. I don't even want them to separate cos we being apart from my nephew and niece would probably kill my mum and would affect me greatly. But this their relationship is so toxic. She says she would report my brother to her brothers and I hope she does cos I want them all to come together and see if there's a way to talk to their sister to stop reacting the way she reacts to things. 



I'm also thinking of maybe sitting down and talking to her about her very rough nature and see if she would listen. I have spoken to my brother already about getting a job and how he should never have hit her. He's been begging her since I told him to go beg her but she's not listening. Can I talk to her without her thinking I'm taking my brother's side? I just want them to live happily. It breaks me anytime I see them fight Cos I know the tension that follows after. I'm really glad they don't live alone cos I'm sure one person would have killed the other already.

Please, what do you think I should do?. 



*You are sitting on a time bomb that is taking its time to explode and when it does,it will be really bad...

82 comments:

  1. The no 1 error is that woman agreeing to stay with you guys.

    It shouldn't have happened.

    I think you all should ignore them, your brother needs to really really step up.

    Just take care of the kids, as for the couple. IGNORE!

    Please single ladies, it's a bad idea to move in with your in-laws.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Your own better at least the wife us hard-working
      The only diff btw yours and my bro own is that they do not fight and they live in their own but the lady is one lady bug, looking for who will rent shop in shop rite for her and put 20 sales girls, starting small to be diligent and grow it big isn't in her dictionary

      Delete
    2. That's not a piece of advice Stella.

      Delete
    3. Your brother should do everything legitimate he can to begin to earn a living, quit drinking. If well occupied, he will also be able to control his temper. Both are well married since he has paid her bride price. This woman is now his wife and he has to endure her temperament for now. He was the one that impregnated her and married her.

      The lesson I wish ladies will learn is not to rush to fornication and be pregnant, it rarely ends well. It reduces the dignity of a woman. It is a gateway to wrong choices and biased choices..

      Delete
    4. Poster the problem here is your brother.

      He has pushed this woman beyond her limits with his irresponsible behavior.

      If not for the fact that Nigerian women and living with man/ marriage are like white rice and stew; she's better off away from your brother.

      What to do? Cut off support for your brother. Make the house hot for him. Let him stand up and stop being comfortable with you alls support.

      His woman is helping your family do what your family failed to do. You call her quarelsome cos she doesn't indulge his silliness?

      Living with an irresponsible man is a total nightmare I don't wish an enemy. Face your bro and leave the lady alone; she's reacting rightly to what is before her...

      Delete
    5. Anon 22:03, God bless you!! Poster, your brother is the problem here. If he gets a job, stops drinking and hanging around riffraffs and starts contributing like a man towards his family; all the fights will stop. And you’re right in saying you guys are probably the reason things haven’t escalated past this because your efforts pacify his wife to a large extent but living with a lazy Ama useless man brings the worst out of you

      Delete
  2. The thing you're not seeing is, not every man and woman are meant together. This is a case of fire and water, they can never gel. But above all, let your brother get a job, no woman will love or respect a jobless lazy man. I'm wondering how that lady got pregnant the second time after realizing the situation on ground




    *Larry was here*

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. You are crying for your brother? Aunty you don’t have what to cry about, let your parents send both of them out, this is what pre marital sex causes, when we warn people they will not hear.
      Firstly, your brother is useless, sorry to say this but how can he say the only way to avoid her is to sit and drink with riffraffs? So he can’t use his time to make money, even if it’s to work in construction sites (like Nigerian film) well I don’t blame him, you guys keep settling things for him, when you leave him to fend for his kids then he will know what it means to be a father.
      All the small small monies he feels he is using to drink can be put together to sell even if it’s drinks around your hood. He even has change to be buying for useless girls.
      Then to the girl that wanted to enter marriage by force, she’s not just serious, she can’t be frustrated about what she got herself into, what is she fighting? Dint she know her hubby dint have money before getting pregnant for him? Dint she know he was a drunk? She wants to change a man, a broke man at that, she’s not serious, she has made her bed so she should spread on it.
      The best you can do for them is to cut them off, after all you all need money for yourself cus you are only enabling them, or you can take the kids and chase them out

      Delete
  3. So domestic violence is now the sole birthright of the female gender? I see where gender equality and feminist talk is taking us to!!
    Nonsense and ingredients. Except there is more to it, this iyawo is bad market.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. They should also go and do family planning o, before them go born another one, fight today sex tomorrow

      Delete
  4. I don’t understand how a mother would be comfortable taking care of her grown up son and his family. Also, what kind of hardworking lady puts up with a man with no job and moves in with him because she got pregnant?

    See this mentality of making incompatible people marry because of some baby needs to stop. People don’t have to be “married” to raise a child. Look at all this mess over one issue that could have been avoided? Now your brother needs to get a job, it’s because he is jobless that’s why he is always available to get into fights with his wife.

    Your Mum also needs to stop enabling him, haba! What manner of disguise is this one that she wants to get killed over? Your brother needs to get his life together and stop being a mama’s boy. Those kids shouldn’t have to grow up in such an unhealthy environment - domestic violence and an abusive relationship ends up making kids see it as normal.

    This story is sad, your mother needs to get that grown ass man out of her house. If he is old enough to have a family then he should also be grown enough to be responsible on all sides and not only when it’s time to show his sexual prowess in bed.

    You are glad they don’t live alone? Lol I’d assume that you also intend to have your own family too in that same house. This one done pass ordinary eyes mbok. The lady and your brother need to separate for a while so he can focus on getting a job, maybe then they’d both realign their expectations. How long do you guys want to keep closing the gap? You’d train those kids for how long? They’d still have more because what else is there for them to do than bang every night as per make up sex after every fight. Wo I’m tired but your mother needs to wake up.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. @Doppelganger
      She said "She was glad they do not live alone because of the rate of dv"
      I am even scared for such couple leaving alone

      Delete
    2. I dey tell you, their mom spoilt him, you all are enabling him, stop enabling a grown ass man who lives in his mama's house with wife and kids. The lady needs to leave that environment,fustration has turned her to something else. Those two have no business getting married.

      Delete
  5. They are not meant for each other , 2 toxic people staying together is hell.let them break up and ur brother should get a job any job and u and ur mom should stop taking care of his bills.

    ReplyDelete
  6. Solution is for babe's to avoid premarital sex. If she didn't get pregnant for your brother, they would have broken up by now. Despite the toxic relationship, they are doing traditional wedding. Your brother is definitely the one driving her nuts. He should be a man and stop wasting his youth. Get a job.
    Send him a link to this post to reset his brain

    ReplyDelete
  7. Hmm . I think you should direct your talk towards your brother. The wife is just angry that your brother has left all responsibility for her and your family. It will really help if he looks for something doing so as to avoid going to drink with area people. The lady is obviously not happy with him being lazy. He should make moves,even if he brings Lil am sure she will appreciate.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yes you guys are trying financially but that lady is bitter and has every reason to be bitter.

      Your brother is very irresponsible and has been over pampered. Where did you guys get it wrong? Feeding a grown ass!!!. If I were her I will walk with my kids and leave you guys to keep pampering your brother.

      If it were abroad your brother would have been kicked out of the house He knows how to fuck but can't try and get a job?? All he does is drink and you think the lady will be happy.

      Your brother is the one with a problem. On top being a low life, he is cheating. What efforts are you guys making to make him responsible? Perhaps the lady agreed to the initial arrangement of moving in with you guys but she has seen that your brother is a loafer and has no plans. Who wants to be staying with in laws forever no matter how nice they are?

      Who wants to be at the mercy of in laws ? Your brother is lazy and highly irresponsible, people like that will soon start thinking of inheriting property since he has absolutely no plans for his useless life.

      Delete
  8. Just one condom would have saved all these problems....

    ReplyDelete
  9. Can you just shut up you poster

    You have an infidel of a brother. What do you think your stipends mean to a married woman?

    Except your brother becomes a real man, start a job or a business, your house will remain in chaos

    So your broke as brother has a Dick to impregnate the girl. You said 2 year old and 2 months baby. Did the 2 months baby walk to you or they now have another baby making it 3 kids.

    Your brother should get a life and be a man. That lady is carrying more than she can handle, that's why you'll see her as uncouth.

    Did your brother buy her a car and give her family and personal upkeep and you'll still see them fight?

    Your problem is poverty and your lazy brother is the cause

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. LOLO IDEATO .Must u insult the poster be4 u give ur advice . I can see ur very rude, pride and arrogant. U better work on ur tongue .

      Delete
    2. What bush did you escape from?
      Is your brain in order?
      Or cramps is doing you?

      Do you know the courage it takes to send in a chronicle? The nerves that come with spilling your personal affairs to strangers to dissect Just because you're confused and there's probably nobody to talk to and you need counsel?

      Just look at your stupid diagnosis in that last line..
      Are you an idiot?
      Must you comment?
      A thin line exists between being rude and being blunt. Know it and don't be a useless entity.

      Delete
    3. Sweet mum, Lolo said nothing but the truth! Insults are needed in chronicles like this..

      Delete
    4. No sweet mum, you shut up.. Did she mention you in her advice, I don't see any insult,but the oversabe in you makes you feel she has pride, rude and arrogant.. If you don't have any advice to give the poster, let people give their own advice without putting your rat mouth.. Nonentity

      Delete
  10. Not everyone can live "happily" without money.Your brother should go hustle like a man and earn his wife's respect.

    No sane lady wants a "lazy man" its unfortunate she keeps opening her legs for him.My dear the only talk that will happen here is for your brother to get a job or a skill.

    The question you should ask yourself is for how long will you continue emptying your accounts for them? I am for supporting family but you are not helping your brother.He is relaxed becos he knows you "guys" will always step up.

    The girl shouldn't fight her hubby but I want to believe its out of frustration.You said so yourself that she is nice if not for her somewhat troublesome nature.

    I pray they talk to each other and find out how to move to the next level cos their family will soon outgrow that master bedroom.I pity the kids in all this.

    ReplyDelete
  11. Is it by force to live together???

    ReplyDelete
  12. Poster your brother needs to get a JOB. You people have destroyed him as a man but you think you are helping him. Okay he made a mistake with the first pregnancy, granted mistakes happen. But how does a jobless man go on to get his wife pregnant a 2nd time. I know couples both working that have held on to just having one child till the economy is better, or business picks up.
    He's procreating away while you and your mum is paying hospital bills, school fees, naming ceremony,birthday party etc. If he cant get a job for now cant he be driving Uber?
    Money is tight and he is wasting little resources on beer parlours. Im not exonerating the wife afteall they gave birth together. But try and understand that part of her anger stems from your bro's laziness, with her two kids she is still working, evenings she is picking snails for side-hustle. Do you also feel she is happy living in in-laws house and in-law is feeding her. No matter how much you guys help her. She will always feel her husband should be doing it.
    Try and understand things from her point of view, she is frustrated hence her aggressiveness.
    You and your family are obviously good people, but you need to cut the rope and let your brother be a man. He is too comfortable becos all his needs are met.
    The wife may have a bad attitude yes, but your brothers laziness over-shadows that bad attitude.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. How your mom decided to carry your irresponsible brother's load is my concern. by now she is supposed to be eating the fruit of her labor but she has added to the labor itself. If only they had abstained from premarital s**, all theses would have been avoided. Poster, you too ask yourself, how long will I continue to spend all my pocket for someone that does not deem it fit to stand up for his family. Also ask yourself how long can I endure staying at my in laws place, laboring for a man that has no job and spends the little he has drinking away with useless people.

      Delete
  13. But you people cannot continue living their lives for them, spending your hard earned cash on them, you have your own life to live. Those two need to be living on their own, there's nothing you guys can do about this situation, you cannot stop the fights neither can you stop your niece & nephew from experiencing all those things happening.
    Unfortunately it's what life has got for them presently. Maybe prayer can work. Maybe you all can leave the house for them, go live elsewhere & leave them with their whahala, I'm sure the woman has some sense, if she can't manage her family & stop the man from beating her then it's her fault. She either stays or leaves.

    ReplyDelete
  14. This is a very strong reason why a man or a woman should not get married only because the woman got pregnant. Families should also not enforce marriage because their son got a girl pregnant or their daughter got pregnant. It is not a true test of love.

    ReplyDelete
  15. The problem is from your brother. he is irresponsible, if you cant father a child why have him?

    ReplyDelete
  16. Marriage is not by force let them separate for a while before they kill somebody and as for your brother he should step up and start providing for he's home haba so that he can move out,they are disturbing your parents at there age they don't need stress. Look for a better time to speak to the lady haba she get strength to dey fight up and down,call family meeting I mean just your family oo including husband and wife so they tell each what he or she is doing that they don't like and just to resolve it after that if no changes let them separate or park out simple

    ReplyDelete
  17. tell your brother to get a job and all these problem will be over

    ReplyDelete
  18. Your brother is a useless man for putting your family through this.

    He better go and cut off his dick, as broke as he is he still knows how to have erection and have unprotected sex.

    Making your mother that should be resting to spend money she should be using on herself.

    You people in your family are aslso enablers, helping him marry, paying for him to have sex and bring children into this world that will come and suffer.

    He got her pregnant the first time, and now he has done another one beacause he knows you people will handle the financial side.

    Do you see how useless he is? Instead of finding money to raise his family, he has drink money. What is he going to drink for?

    I feel like slapping you and your mum. If you check properly now, she has probably been babying your brother since he was little, that is why a grown man that can bring out his prick to fuck, is procreating for his mother to train.

    I am thoroughly disgusted. This why rich people stay away from the poor, see the kind of yamayama gist that sorround them.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. You feel like slapping her and her "MUM"?. Like really?. Mind you am not the poster but simply because someone brought their issue here doesn't mean you open your wide mouth like gutter and spew out your sewage waste you call saliva. MANNERLESS GIRL!!!!

      Delete
    2. @ reasonable doubt,ko ro gba lenu e, rabid dog. If someone says they feel like slapping your mom or dad, hope you will be delighted? Alaileko!!!

      Are you sure you are not under a curse? Stella, people like these should be called to order, better to have few sane bvs than have a useless lot.

      Delete
    3. Slap her and her mom? Is that how you slap your parents? You must be high. Very high. Poster, pls disregard that statement. Some people don't know how to stay quiet.

      Delete
    4. Really Really Manner less, can imagine the kind of irresponsible/disrespectful human we are breeding.

      You can advise the poster without being rude to her family especially her mother who can give birth to you.

      Delete
    5. @16:27 and 16:59

      That one is another Rottweiler o.
      It will soon come back and insult you and your generations.
      Better face front.
      It's not everybody's comment you respond to.

      Delete
    6. @20:29,it would come back and insult"IT" own generation and past ancestors you mean?.

      Rottweiler ko, bulldog ni, mtshew.

      Where your own craze stop is where another person's own start,except Stella don't post most of the replies here to regulate her blog which is understandable.

      Delete
  19. Its better they separate o. What if they fight on a day that nobody is around to separate them and one person ends up killing the other? This relationship is too toxic abeg.

    ReplyDelete
  20. abeg both the husband and wife need deliverance

    ReplyDelete
  21. This sounds like a couple that doesn’t need to be together. The lady can move out and live with the children. That doesn’t mean that the children won’t be in your lives. I think the best thing is for the couple to separate. Children can still be raised with love even if their parents aren’t together.

    ReplyDelete
  22. After you people saw the murder and suicide signs joined together you still went to pay bride price. Una no serious at all. And the stupid "hardworking" girl too opened legs to collect stamp 2 from your jobless brother. You people should continue aiding and abetting nonsense. Tell the girl to return to her family house until your brother gets a job. Then tell your parents to eject your brother too. Let him go and hustle to rent an apartment. If she wants to go with her kids, allow her. Or better still, rent one room for them far away from where you live so that your mother can live long. The day they come to call you people that they've killed themselves, jejely go and bring your niece and nephew home after you bury the idiots. People wey get cap but do not have correct head to wear it. Better gather mind and do the right thing asap.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. The deed has been done already.

      Let them consider possible separation first and maybe divorce if things don't get better after a stipulated time.(they should agree on this without emotions rather with clear heads)

      While they are apart, your bro must start working and fending for his kids and wife.

      Whether or not your bro must leave the family house to learn to be a man, get his own accommodation.

      Wife should go to a sane environment with the kids.

      Both of them must be warned never to add another pregnancy to what is already on ground.

      Your parents, you and your other siblings must learn to let go cuz that where the solution lies. With all good you intended see how things turned out, it means that they aren't doing it right. So do it differently please.

      Delete
  23. So after all the fighting they still do the do and bring forth another baby. Fight and do make up sex. Let them continue. They are so not compatible but in this naija its better or for worse divorce is after one person is almost dead.
    Marriage without Money no dey sweet at all.

    ReplyDelete
  24. Hmm I think the major issue is the fact that your brother has nothing doing.because as you explained,you guys co-operate and understand each other so the problem is with your brother.he should step up and stop being lazy and non chalant because you and your mom are helping.though the lady has her own issues which is fighting and hitting your brother,i can tell that she does that out of frustration cos no woman will be comfortable seeing her husband not making any effort to provide for the house.so you all need to have a family meeting to discuss and decided on the way forward.

    ReplyDelete
  25. The wife has anger issue, but you and your mom are destroying your brothers life, you have spoilt him for any woman by doing all what you do for him. When he is not a cripple someone that can sit down and drink in beer parlour he cannot and clearly does not intend to fend for his family, waiting for you people to do everything. A wife who clearly hustles to make ends meet would surely be irritated and frustrated by such a lazy and entitled man. Unfortunately her past mistake of getting pregnant in such circumstances has messed up her future, I really sympathize with her. Your brother is truly a nuisance and you and your mom are not helping.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. The first baby was a mistake, the 2nd one is What?

      Delete
    2. I don't think the pregnancy was the mistake, the actual mistake was going forward to do traditional wedding after seeing that they had unsettled fundamental issues.

      Delete
    3. who will not have anger issues under such frustrating circumstances? una go just dey type rubbish in the name of comment

      Delete
  26. Nobody wants a lazy man as a husband, your brother needs to go look for a job no matter how little the pay is. He is jobless and that's why he has a lot of time to drink and fight. leaving the house to go drink is not the answer that time he uses to drink should be his working time. The moment your Bro starts working and providing for his family this lady will give herself brain. The truth is that it can be frustrating picking the bills and seeing that your man isn't even doing anything to help out. Meanwhile tell them to go for family planning now, they should stop producing baby until your bro can take care of his family. He can't continue stressing your mum

    ReplyDelete
  27. How long will your mum continue to settle quarrel? What about your father? Is he indulging all these brouhaha too? How long will you continue to shoulder the responsibilities of your niece & nephew?
    But that your brother no get shame sha. At his age, he's still living & breeding in his father's house & under his mother's roof.

    That lady sef get her own for body. Every time fight. Na wa oo 🙄

    🚶🚶🚶🚶

    ReplyDelete
  28. Don't leave the job hunt alone to your brother. You should spread the word out that you have a brother who is job hunting. Tell him to try N power. If he is the type that selects jobs you're in big trouble. Again, does this lady have any educational qualifications? Does she need to go back to school to increase her chances? If your brother is not serious about getting a job, you should focus on job hunting for the lady. Again, did she learn any handiwork? Perhaps you can contribute money to set her up. Better than emptying account for birthday parties.
    Now, it is very clear that the lady was a bit desperate to be married. Or she likes your bro more than he likes her. She's also afraid that she will not meet another man who will accept her as a single mother. Those are the only reasons a hardworking woman will stay with a dead beat baby father.
    You will take her out to an eatery for a treat. When you are joking and in a relaxed mood, you will bring up her hot temper issue. Offer to pray or fast with her against the spirit of anger. This may not do anything in reality but it will make her more self conscious. Ask her if she has ever considered seperating from your bro. Ask her if she intends to have more children. Of course, you will use sense and tact to ask these questions. You need to convince by showing her examples of single mothers that found love again. These 2 people need to be kept apart. Your brother is not going to change.
    If she gets a self con with a 50k combined monthly income, I believe that she can cope with 2 kids.
    If these 2 people continue to coexist as a couple, some major damage is in the future. Worse still, if they remain a couple in your house.
    For how long will this continue?
    You can't afford to be roped into this mess.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Did they teach him for fuck? Why can't he learn to find job himself ?
      He's the posters senior bro. Did anyone help her to find her own job.

      Delete
    2. My first job I got at 22yrs. I found that job myself in a school before NYSC. Pay was 50k and that was 10yrs ago as a receptionist.

      Delete
    3. Lol @ did they teach him to fuck?

      Delete
  29. Your brother should get a job and move out of the family house.

    ReplyDelete
  30. Kai when there is no money, love will be very far.

    All of you spoiled your brother. His own is to nack and keep drinking.

    The lady should move out before sometching bad happens.

    I am blaming you all for your brother uselessness

    ReplyDelete
  31. Continue aiding and abetting foolishness. Those kids will soon come of age and they will be watching. Efulefu brother with child of anger wife. I wonder why she is so angry, did anybody press her neck and force her to spread her legs for a never do well. A young man will be busy in the afternoon everyday at a drinking spot because he has people that will shoulder his responsibilities. Mshewwwwww...

    ReplyDelete
  32. Don't listen to those blaming your brother .the wife is completely at fault. She knows exactly whom she got pregnant for and whom she married. the guy didn't mislead her she followed a man with no money maybe because of good sex or because she just liked his swag but that is not for you to worry about. that's her choice. What is going on in your own life .what are you doing for yourself. Write here and look for help with getting yourself out of that house and face your life. They will figure out their own life when they see that others are not minding them anymore. Stop spending your money on ceremonies that she wants. You can help with food but there's no reason you're emptying your bank account for them to do naming ceremony

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. This is the only sensible comment. Both of them are at fault. She knew the guy is lazy and no good yet she continued with the sham marriage. You and your mum should ignore them to sought themselves out, I ll suggest they separate for a while. You guys should stop feeding him. I bet you, he'll sit up.

      Delete
  33. It's best you all try to talk sense to your brother to get a job. He needs to be responsible ,only then will his wife respect him.

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    ReplyDelete
  34. Why are you people forcing this poster?
    But some women sef , how do u do it ? U bold dey born pikin inside suffer? In 2018? Tufiakwa ......

    ReplyDelete
  35. The problem is Money and an enabling family!
    There's no problem with your sister in law she is just frustrated and that's perfectly normal considering the DEAD BEAT man of a brother she is married to!
    I am ashamed for and on behalf of your family
    Why are you people enabling him to be soo useless and dead beat?
    Why is he still leaving with you people?
    Your mother has over pampered and treated your brother with kids gloves now he's undeniably stupid a drunkard a womaniser who's got nothing to show for it.
    What does he even bring to the table?
    Absolutely nothing! Zilch!!
    I am soo upset at your family, you people are really and truly embarrassing. Kai
    Your brother must be responsible
    He should get a freaking job!

    ReplyDelete
  36. Your brother is an irresponsible, jobless, womanising, alcoholic he goat who has been spoilt rotten by you all. The girl suffers from low self esteem and is very immature. Your family has enabled this toxic environment for too long. Kick both of them out. They are adults and not your responsibility. At this rate Aunty, you will never have any savings. You were not sent on this earth to cater for grown irresponsible adults.

    ReplyDelete
  37. What kind of disgusting story is this? Fight fight every time. That's how they will fight and have 7kids, poor people and their way of life. By poor, i mean their mentality. Your nebigbour would have been tired of you people by now.

    ReplyDelete
  38. For how long can you and your mum sustain your brother and his family?You aren't helping him with all this pampering,he needs to go out and hustle.A man who is jobless has money to drink,I'm sure he gets the money from you and your mum.Stop enabling his bad habits and blame the wife when she reacts,it's accumulated anger.Your brother is not responsible and you and your mum caused it.Your mum gave him masters bedroom as per man of the house.Your mother is supposed to be eating the fruits of her labor but she's back to training kids.Train your children so you will have rest.

    ReplyDelete
  39. I feel you and your mum is enabling your brother to be lazy by paying off all his responsibilities. For crying out loud, u pay for his hospital bills, feeding, birthday, he even has money to go use drink almost every e vening which I guess he gets the money from you guys. No wonder he has the mind to give birth to another child becos he doesn't pay any bills.
    I doubt if you and your mum can stand your grounds and stop paying all these bills, force him to get a job and take care of his family/responsibilities. How do you expect his wife not to have any resentment and anger when she does so much to provide for the family and all your brother does is to drink and sleep all day. Why won't she be frustrated and fighting all the time

    ReplyDelete
  40. You all keep enabling him. He’s not going to change. You keep emptying your account for celebrations. Why is that mandatory? Can’t they cut their coat? Good luck to you.

    ReplyDelete
  41. Your brother and his wife need to stay apart for now while you all work out things. Both of them staying together will mess things up badly, the both of them are not matured to be together, they need to grow up.

    ReplyDelete
  42. You guys should talk some sense into your brother concerning getting a job with regular pay. Try helping him by asking him what kind of work he can do and help check for job vacancies.

    you guys can't continue footing his bills and shouldering his responsibilities that will not make him become a MAN that will command respect.

    And you poster stop emptying your account please.

    ReplyDelete
  43. Parents, train up your child in the way they should go. As difficult and as painful as it sounds, your mum is reaping the fruits of how she raised your brother.
    My MIL is the same thing, her 40 year old unmarried son will bring dirty clothes for her to wash claiming his hand is painting him. He will come when no one is around and she will steal foodstuff and hide for him. Once they hear my horn, she hides it at the backyard and come to open the front door until I caught her. Yeye dey smell people. @73yrs,she will be giving him money people dashed her for him to use and buy boxers. Everyday, he will come and greet his mum, walk long distance and start talking about people in the village. The moment I stopped stocking the house up with food, his brain reset.
    For this Buhari period, I don't have the strength to work for another full grown man to eat. Very arrogant fool. He would even have mind to be dragging TV stations with me. Mtchewww. I await the day he will impregnate someone. Pin, I will not buy. Rubbish

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Exactly what my mil dies to her 43 years old son. Dropped out of school and decided education was not for him.

      Ok what do you want to do? Today I want to do this, tomorrow I need funds for business, another day I want to travel out of the country.

      All his younger ones will gather money and give him , at the end of the day story. One even sold his car.What did they not do? And when he demands money, he talks as if he gave you money to keep.

      They got tired and said enough is enough, go and sort yourself out.Their mom will cry and start blackmailing them with sickness, she will die, blood pressure,this and that.

      Delete
  44. There's a bible verse that says an ill bred child will bring disgrace to his mother. That's what is happening here. Your brother is irresponsible but I am sorry I'll have to blame you and your parents more for enabling this rubbish to go on longer than it should. How can you people be feeding and housing a grown married man for goodness sake? Footing birthday bills and so on...How ridiculous! That BV that wrote she feels like slapping you all...I don't blame him/her. You people are not nice and accommodating. You people are foolish! Keep dealing with the consequences of your foolishness.

    ReplyDelete
  45. Your brother needs a job to be financially capable and responsible as a husband. seek the help of a professional marriage counsellor for them.

    ReplyDelete
  46. your brother was and stil being spoilt by you guys...the marriage started on a faulty note and cannot survive tillthey both retrace their steps positively.
    1) sit both of them down and tell them the whole truth
    2) your brother must go get any job to do as you will no longer provide food for his family
    3) they need to move out and look for a house...if he doesnt agree, give him a deadline. if your mum insist and let him stay, you move out.
    4) stop paying their bills...the kids are still young, if they dont go to school now heaven wont fall
    5) stand by your mum to stop paying their bills and stop getting emotionally entangled with them.
    6) strong your heart cos if you dont make these changes your brother wont change

    ReplyDelete

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