Stella Dimoko Korkus.com: Chronicle Of Blog Visitor Narrative

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Monday, April 01, 2019

Chronicle Of Blog Visitor Narrative

Hmmm na wah!!!!



STAND ALONE NARRATIVE
ADVICE NEEDED ASAP


Sdk this me writing the story of my life...

I'm the first daughter of my parent. We are a poor but happy family, struggling to succeed in life. After my secondary education I started work as a sales girl some where on the island as I wanted to save some money to further my education.my papa no get oo, but he doesn't joke when it comes to anything Education.



I worked briefly for a year before I gained admission into University and becos of the relationship established I was allowed to come work whenever we are on break. Stella thus was where I met (my estranged husband) who was like a brother n friend to my boss. Fast forward we had our wedding in my 3rd yr in sch , went for service n came back to Lagos to start real life as a married lady... That was the beginning of my travails. To cut the long story short, he suffered a gangrene (sore like) on the leg which made him to travel many places seeking for cure. 


My MIL passed on during thus period as she was been taken care of by me and also caring for my daughter alone then. Burial was fixed n my mother n I travelled down to the east, his only brother who resides in SA also came back(their father is late). Burial things over, I returned to Lagos for my daughter's schooling. The brother n himself agreed that he stayed back in the East permanently as he was no longer interested in working with the company where he is the manager, Cos he said he believed that the boss was responsible for what happens to him. Hmmmmm.


One night , out of the blues, the brother called from SA , instructing me to pack my things and daughter and relocate to the village oooo not even theirs, but to my father's house until things get better. That he would be sending me money. At this point things were already difficult , even to feed. Thank God for my family that stood by me saying No, I should rather dust my certificate n get a job to care for myself n daughter(a computer sci graduate). The first job I applied for, I got as a computer teacher. Which I am still doing till date. Its been 10yrs Stella that he told my family he's no longer interested in the marriage, just like that bcos I disobeyed him and his brother.



Hmmm a lot more that I could not even type here. I give glory to God that things are not like what they used to be ... My daughter is now in Senior secondary and doing excellently well. In fact we are just like sisters cos she's even taller than I am now o, lol. Since pry 1 till now she's in ss1 He has never called or asked after her welfare, schooling ... Na me dey shoulder all but ... I count it all as JOY. Thank you Stella for hearing me out. I will send the 2nd part of my story after this. God bless you.



It dawned on me that the marriage has finally crumbled when he came to Lagos one Sunday morning I was away in church to pack the stuffs he can to his friends place b4 travelling back to east the next morning. He also told the Land Lord to throw us out as he had no business with d house or whoever occupying it . a quit notice was given and my family decided we all contribute n get a place instead of moving back to our our house. We tried every way possible and God intervened at last. My brother and U and my daughter moved in ( this was same period I got the job ) and I began to pick n rebuild my life. Fast forward... I met a young man, whom I tot we could build our lives together and started dating after a loooooog while. He did n planned So many things together, and just like every other relationships we had our ups n downs too, but we always find a way to resolve issues. 



Our relationship was really good despite d challenges. I remembered an occasion I felt something was not going right , I snooped n found things hmmmm, I made up my mind to break up but... After the apologies and promised we still shouldered on. Just last month I found out that he was ... Again dating someone else at the same time with and has even introduced her to the family. Hnmm Stella, all hell was let loosed oo, I confronted him and he was so so ashamed to admit, but the deed is out already. 



I thought to myself ... This time no going back . we had a discussion he scheduled and I told him the relationship is over . Stella hmmmmmm .. This guy refused oo, claiming he made a big mistake. 


See me see gbege oo . When you korokoro carry another girl go Ur family house , u blind? Now u realised it was a mistake ... As I type this now Sdk we are still on the issue. He doesn't want to let me go. Abeg wetin you wan advise ya sister ??



*Seems you have not learned anything fro m the first experience you had....You dont need advice,you need a hot slap to wake you up from this your love slumber.....If you settle for less,you will get even less than you settled for..Remember this and sit up!!!

45 comments:

  1. You are feeling like Queen willy willy because you say he is begging. You are so valuable he doesnt want to loose you, cool tricks.....the other lady is obviously been told the same or more by this charming sir lancelot of urs.....incase u dont know, YOU are the side chick but no wahala, carry on, when he pays that ladies brideprice, u no even know, na the white wedding IV you go see then begin cry men are scum

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. so easy for you people to tell people cruel things in the name of advice. Calling someone a side chick etc is that necessary. Maybe she’s naive but she’s asking for advice which means she’s open to change even if it’s just 1%

      Delete
    2. This your boyfriend or manfriend wants to eat his cake and have it. Show him the door. He is just a smooth talker. The relationship ended the moment he introduced another girl to his family, you didn’t end it. Get that into your head poster.

      Delete
    3. Someone that have the mind to take someone else to his parents while dating you doesn't mean you well

      Delete
  2. Aunty...u dont need any words from me ooo cuz its crystal clear to you that u are going in for a big wahala.



    Mc pinky

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I hate when people say, "he doesn't want to let me go" as what now, just say the d is sweating you abeg, it's like you dint learn your lesson from the first one, give that guy space, is it when he gets married under your nose that you will hear word?

      Delete
  3. Please ma kindly dissolve that relationship, its stress already. You need someone to love you unconditionally, remember you're worth more pls.

    ReplyDelete
  4. Take a break and do other things with your life.

    ReplyDelete
  5. What exactly do U mean by 'he doesn't want to let me go?'.. Did he lock/chain U up somewhere? or is he threatening U? What happened to your free will, Madam? Please U re not a kid, refuse to be toyed with and stand your ground...

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I recognize this writing, this is Love, so you now go anonymous to post. I know your story ma'am, you come here to form humble and submissive wife while you are a die hard feminist in real life. Keep living double lives inugo?

      Delete
  6. Don't mind the guy..he's taking u for a mugu. Thank God u forgot about your horseband too.

    ReplyDelete
  7. You know why your husband and his brother wanted you back to your village? Okay I go yarn you; na to avoid wetin una dey carry atu do especially for Lagos; fork, fork, fork until una go fork husband and wife join.
    You see that second man wey you dey forkship with, another Naija girl don do them magic -man no gree move, them move am. Im go carry girl for ehihie; sunny afternoon go house, carry im mouth tell papa and mama say na im wife be this. Them go go pay bride price, give am wine(carrying) im go drink, dance and im no sabi say anything don happen. Na mistake im call am.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. You don't know anything about her , so stop saying nonsense

      Delete
    2. honestly stella you need to stop enabling this irritants comment....you are utterly disgusting. don't know the kind of female who birthed you cos all u ever do on this blog is insult women...piece of trash

      Delete
    3. What is this one saying?

      Delete
    4. Anon 15.21 you didn't have to insult her. This is someone in distress seeking for help.
      Please don't think everyone is like you who forks around, there are still some decent and responsible women out there. How dare you accuse someone you know nothing about of such a thing to the point of sleeping with husband and wife!
      I understand that youryo stupid but then you don't have to bring your stupidity into everything? Even from you, this is LOW!

      Delete
    5. Mama Mia
      You talk say I dey fork around and you no insult me?
      Make I no talk.
      I wasn't talking about the woman's character in that comment. I been dey talk about
      the pitiable state of Nigeria. How men (her husband/brother) dey perceive Naija girls.
      The girls wey dey do these things dey give Nigerian women (including me) bad names. That's the reality.
      Thank you very much.

      Delete
  8. See you
    He introduced someone else to his family already and you're still seeing him?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Do you know if they're colleague?

      Delete
    2. @Son of Solomon
      Did you send in this chronicle or are you the poster's advocate?
      Here is not a court of law. She asked for opinions, so allow people to air their views.
      Okay, he mistakenly introduced his colleague, a lady to his family isn't it?
      Just read that your line again and cover your face in shame.
      I hope it is not the Solomon that wrote the proverbs that you are calling your dad?

      Delete
    3. No, I'm the poster, neither I'm her advocate, just asking what if she and the guy in question are colleagues, no way she won't see him, please don't get me wrong anonymous, and more so I just understand what Bino mean, my apology, thanks

      Delete
  9. People will only treat you the way you allow yourself to be treated by them.

    It's your life, decide what you want to happen to you.

    ReplyDelete
  10. We focus on career women’s marriages even more than their careers, assume every single woman to be a prostitute or lesbian, advice women to endure cheating and abusive spouses, yet we insult women who are willing to unlock bad behaviour from their partners. It’s time we became consistent with whether we want women to live for marriage or not

    ReplyDelete
  11. I was feeling sorry for you at the beginning cos of all you went through and knowing the kind of family you come from but seems somewhere around the ending you sounded like James Bond. If you don't want history to repeat itself, run. You don't need that stress in your life again please.

    ReplyDelete
  12. Stella Hot slap? Or a couple of very hot sizzling SLAPS!!!!! Poster your head needs resetting!!! How can you even be discussing with this second guy still?!’ You are in denial! Second time he is cheating and even took a girl home ? Why not you? Free the guy joor

    ReplyDelete
  13. Poster, i know u will do the needful. U survived an unfortunate marriage by not playing puppet to ur inlaws whims. U survived ! Thats how i know u will yet survive this. There are men like the second guy who think they can have it all this way. But u are no fool. And i know u wont fall to his trickery. All the best dear...I wont say hope u overcome because I know u will .

    ReplyDelete
  14. Madame you're still single. You already have a child in secondary school so I will be respectful. Pick up your self esteem from where you left it. It's been a while you have were single and dated and now any little effort a man makes on your case will just be shacking you anyhow.
    Again, I missed the part where you divorced your estranged husband or returned bride price. I am not judging you, I am encouraging you to do the right thing for your daughter's sake.

    ReplyDelete
  15. Na wa o . Is it that you are naive or you are feeling so fly?? With what you experienced with your husband, you should have been wary of men by now. Are you the type that think that if you are not married, you are not complete hence your tolerating the excesses from men?? What do you really want in a man and in a relationship?? I am sure that you like his dick-game that is why you are still hanging on. There is nothing in that relationship for you, unless you just want to stay with him for the zex. This kind of man won't even make a good husband. If you must eat frog, eat the one with egg. You are just deceiving yourself by saying that he doesn't want to let go, you are the one that doesn't want to let go, fear of the unknown. It is better to be alone than to be with the kind of guy that you described . Stop hanging out with him, block his number from reaching you , do not let him come to your house, do not give him any form of audience, delete his phone number , if you are really through to yourself. I am sure that what you want to hear from us is that you should give him another chance. My dear,no second chance to a DOA relationship. There is nothing in the relationship for you. A word is enough for the wise. I wish you all you wish for yourself.

    ReplyDelete
  16. No darling, you are the one who doesn't want to let him go. Com' on sis, we are women, we know the drill. No unwanted man can hang on to us if we're not in one way or another enabling him, unless ofcourse, he is a psycho stalker. Which he isn't. It appears you feel special that he still came back to you even after he introduced another woman to his family, but baby, you have to stop and ask yourself what manner of man would do that to a lady he respects? Let's not even say love because that would be pushing it.

    A man whose conscience allows him "bypass" the woman he has been with for someone else and later comes back to cry "wolf" without calling off the "mistake introduction". Honey, can't you see how this ends? He doesn't think you are good enough to marry, so he will go ahead and marry his choice, then keep stringing you along as long as you allow him play you. Please, there's absolutely nothing special in what he is doing to you, it's actually the opposite of special.

    Darling, you have to be a role model to your daughter. Is this the lesson you want her to learn, that it's okay to be sloppy second to a man who met you first? Or you think your daughter isn't learning morals from you? The unspoken lessons are the ones children imbibe most. Daughters instinctively do what they see their mothers do. The lesson you should be teaching your daughter is, being single is better than being with a man who doesn't treat you right. You've come such a long way to be played like a Spanish guitar and be jovial about it because you don't seem to realise you're being played. You ought to revolt and put and end to the disrespect.

    Perhaps he sees you've placed a low premium on yourself because of your journey and he is treating you the way you portray yourself subconsciously. My darling, you are a Queen! I don't care what your past is, it's time to put some "respeck" on your womanhood and take back your affections from the man who doesn't know your worth. Please darling, even if you feel weak, find the strength because of your daughter. Let her see that her mummy is a strong woman! Say a resounding NO to emotional abuse, stop abusing yourself emotionally by allowing this charade continue.

    e-hugs and kisses.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Oh God see this sensible Bv, please bless her and may her wisdom pill never run dry

      Delete
    2. Oh, Ronalda! You have scattered my brain this morning. Your head too get sense. I'm going to copy this your comment and read it to myself from time to time.

      Delete
  17. Poster my own is please watch anyman coming close to u not to molest my innocent friend. Its nit easy being single. But u dont need a man to validate your existence. Remove marriage from mind you will get it

    ReplyDelete
  18. Foolish write up. I thought you get sense sef but nothing upstairs.

    ReplyDelete
  19. Poster you deserve better.... Dump him and move on.

    ReplyDelete
  20. Better quit that relationship and move on, don't just jump into any relationship till you finalize with your ex. Has he collected your bride price or divorced you properly and meanwhile you never told us if you discovered his reasons for abandoning you two,so it help you work on your next relationship . Goodluck in your next search

    ReplyDelete
  21. well if he doesn't want to let go fine! just tell him the only condition you stay in that relationship is if he starts planning for your court wedding.

    ReplyDelete
  22. Poster...before I even drop a possible solution you may not adhere to..one first question?

    Have you properly divorced your first husband?
    Or his packing his things and using word of mouth to say he is divorced is what you term divorce..abi na word of mouth he take marry you?

    Poster..when you answer that question ..we can move forward. If you aren't properly divorced ..yo uh are simply committing adultery

    ReplyDelete
  23. All I know is if I come back to this world, I will never marry a Nigerian man again.

    ReplyDelete
  24. Someone that have the mind to take another to his parents while dating you doesn't mean you well.use your tongue to count your teeth

    ReplyDelete

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