STAND ALONE NARRATIVE
DISTRESSED HEART.
Good day Stella. I love what you are doing and how you have been helping a lot of people find help. Please keep me anonymous.
Over to my chronicle. I never believed for once in my life that I would reach out to people I barely know for help, but as it is, I have no close friends and I really need to talk to someone.
I met this guy a few months back. He was not the regular kind of guy. There was something totally off about him, and I couldn't place my hands on what it was.
The first day we went on a date, we got talking, and I realized that this was not really my kind of guy. He wasn't from the east, and he had this weird notions of what a relationship should look like. I marked him off after the first date, because I didn't really like him and I knew I couldn't buy into his ideas, but this guy persisted, so I decided to give it a try.
I didn't set my heart to being in a relationship With him, I just played along as a friend. This guy was nice, he was good and almost perfect, but he was restless.
Several times he would go off in the middle of a conversation, I mean totally blank out and go mute on me. I would ponder and wonder what the problem was, but I couldn't place my hands on what could really be wrong with him.
This guy made several attempts to have s#x with me, but I refused. He kept persisting until finally I told him I was a virgin. The amazing thing is that, after I told him about my virginity, he said he was never gonna have s#x with me. He said he loved me too much to take away my virginity before marriage. He loved my body though, and he said he couldn't stop touching it, that it was beautiful and all, but most times I prevented him from touching me because although I had started to like him, I knew we could never be together.
One day, we got into a fight and he went quiet on me again. I was mad, I couldn't take it anymore, so I told him off and walked out of his car. The next day he called and apologized, then took me out to dinner. After the dinner, he got all emotional and started telling me about his life, how he had two sons with his ex girlfriend and how he lost all three of them in a day to an accident that was partly his fault.
That night he also told me he was engaged to be married. I wasn't shocked. I knew all along that something was up. I spent the night at his place and he tried having s#x with me. He said I should marry him, so we could run away together but of course I didn't heed him.
Down to my major problem. After all secrets have been revealed, I realized that I had unconsciously fallen in love with this guy, I mean I deeply love him.
He is married now, but still communicates with me. It doesn't seem as if anything has changed. I know this might sound weird but I love our friendship the way it is.
He is deeply attracted to my body but doesn't ever suggest s#x anymore. I have tried cutting him off, but he keeps calling, saying nothing can ruin our friendship. Am tired of this circle, but I don't know how to get away from this mess. I have tried dating other people but I keep seeing him, smelling him, everything I do seems to be connected to him.
My problem is that I don't even care that he is married. It seems he has me locked up. His ideas are now my ideas. I now believe in everything he believes in. Please I need help, he controls my mind.
*WHAT!!!!!...shege jagwa......
Do you need a slap to wake up?HOT SLAP!!!
his ideas are now your ideas?wake up and smell the coffee before you lose more than your heart......
Lol.
ReplyDeleteThis thing called "love" comes with constant interaction.
You want to get away from someone you seem attached to? Cut off the interaction on all forms.
At first, it will seem painful and you will feel you can't do it but with time?
It will become normal.
Respect his home/marriage madam.
Stella where is ur slap when we needed it more? I can't believe u did not slap her and u are still asking questions..
DeleteMost women love taken men..If this guy was single she would have dumped him long time ago..But bcos she tried to make him cancel his marriage and marry her but it did not work out,she resorted to being d side piece..She know what she is doing and no matter the advice we give her,she will still be fucking him..
All of u chronicle posters always claim u haven't had sex..Aunty agbaya ANG u see what u have caused? U keep castigating them for gbenshing and they have resorted to lying..No matter ur anger about premarital sex,they won't stop doing it..If u like shout from now till ten years coming,u won't stop anybody from having pre marital sex..Keep that energy and advice for ur kids when they grow up..They need it more than d people u think u are advicing on a faceleef blog..Ur problem is deep mental issues and joblessness..
Poster tell urself d truth,d guy has been fucking u from day one and u are not a virgin..Why would he like ur body and be touching u and never fucked u? A married man for that matter..Make lie kill u there .Keep wasting ur time falling stupidly in love with a married man..Ode! His idea is now ur idea? As his wife or what? Dis is how many of u hung unto married men bcos of foolish love and waste ur youth till u clock 35yrs with no husband and u will start looking for village people that did u..Continue inugo!
True @ Candor
DeletePoster I think getting is what is worrying you. You have looked around nobody is coming. You now remembered you had the chance to take this guy but you blew it.
DeleteNever thought I would say this but...
ReplyDeleteIts official, many women don't know what they want.
Mtscchhheewww
DeleteBia poster, yuh are fond of him. Stop saying he keeps calling you. Block his number and on every social media platform. After sometime, you will see you are not so into him. Then, you can unblock him.
Don’t be stupid please. He doesn’t love yuh my dear. If he did, he won’t have gone ahead to marry the other lady. He would have called that one off to be with you. If yuh like go and fuck Him, na yuh sabi. You will still lose at the end of the day.
Abeg no Dey mumu. Abeg
Can't argue with you there. It seems to be the case thus far. Women "falling in love" with men due to lack of options and the need for attention.
DeleteYou knew you weren't going to settle with him and you were "sleeping in his house"
ReplyDelete"He is so nice to me... he is married now"
Ehhhhhh?
Why are Naija girls so money/fork conscious? 😯😯
You had all the chance to marry him but you did not.
Marry and runaway indeed -running away from what bikonu?
When fowl fart, the ground go dey pursue am okwa ya?
Madam, na only you waka come o.
If you run mad or get acid baptism pursuing this married man, take it as
occupational hazard of side chikitos inugo?
😯😯😯😯😯
She never had the chance to marry him. He never wanted her. I believe he's still trying to see if he can sleep with her. Men aren't that deep or complex abeg
DeleteShe didn't have any chance to marry him oh, the guy had his main fiance, and was simply using her and probably other girls to get as much sex as he could. He must have mentioned marriage to all of them as well.
Delete@luleha...U believe she hasn't fucked him yet? A naija girl will love a guy dis deeply and her leg hasn't parted yet? If u believe dis u will believe anything..She lied about sleeping with him to avoid being bashed..Trust me.
Delete@Iuleha virologist
DeleteYep, you're right. Mr. Man is probably still keeping her around to see if she would finally allow him to kick in her hymen.
She's just love bombing her. When he's succeeded and had a few fucks, he'll frustrate her into dumping him.
What did I just read? 😳
ReplyDeleteYou are funny, you actually think we are stupid don’t you or maybe you are the one who is because this your chronicle should not be coming from a right thinking person.
You aren’t having sex with this guy (yimu) but you can’t stop getting entangled with him even though he is married. I can bet that this guy was married all along and just wanted to eat and run but your made up virginity story threw him off. He suddenly grew a conscience knowing fully well he was just out to chop and clean mouth but he needs to do more work since you’re a “virgin”.
What amazes me with women is that we have great intuitive skills and our antennas catch fraudulent people quickly but we always ignore. You had your doubts from the jump but “somehow fell in love”, even when everything you felt in your gut turned out to be true you are stuck.
You are your own problem, perhaps you should sleep with him so your mind can be at rest, the day this guy has sex with you Is the day he’d stop calling you. You don’t even have sense and you and yesterday’s poster must be related. He had a wife, he’d chop her and chop you. Enjoyment minister, I like his brain.
Damn, who hurt you?
DeleteThe man has ewure (goat) tendencies
DeleteAbeg don't like him
In "love" with a married man?
ReplyDeleteSatan is hungry for Peppersoup and your
body (your meat) is being marinated for the grill.
Nne, you are in LUST okay?
Poster how old are you? You don't really know what you want for your life.
ReplyDeleteCan this be jazz???
ReplyDeleteNo!
DeleteWhich jazz? Just a confused little girl.
DeleteNot jazz... It's simple arithmetic. She go see the answer 😂
DeleteY'all need to stop with this jazz thing. There is no such thing as jazz in this situation. She's been manipulated and from the looks of it is ripe for harvesting.
DeleteShey they dinor tell you that "what you cant eat, dont smell"
ReplyDeleteHe will start having sex with you very soon and once he start, forget it, you will never have sense again in your life.
ReplyDeleteHow old are you ?! ..😂
God bless you Don!
DeleteYeah poster how old are you again...???
DeleteI'm sure you are not up2 20yr i guess...
I agree she is so gone. I guessing all these is stemming from her being parched for attention. She needs to learn to go out, have fun and date. Stop waiting for a random guy to save you unless you do enjoy being alone then great.
DeleteWhat are you doing with a married man? Until he fucks you, your eyes go clear.
ReplyDeleteStella bring those our eslaps ooo
you are a virgin na. Quite naive I must add. You will shed lifelong tears if you don't borrow urself brain. Even the bible says, 'be wise as a serpeant and gentle as a dove'. Dont be a fool, your chastity is his attraction.It will be sad that in the end, its a married, two timing pathological liar that will claim this sacred land. Chai.. Its like Regina Daniels even has more sense than you. Please respect yourself and do the needful. Cut him off.
ReplyDeleteWhich virgin?
DeletePlease, stop all interactions with him. You'll forget him.
ReplyDeletesmelly story...biko si eba puo
ReplyDeleteHe knew what he was doing from the get-go. Hahahahaha it's a game to him and you are his prey. It is all part of his excitement. He enjoys the thrill of it.
ReplyDeleteIv almost been in this situation before long ago just that mine wasn't married but in a serious relationship.. They make you fall in love with them and then tell you they have someone. By that time you are emotionally attached to them and it's hard to let go. They know if they tell you at the start,you won't even agree to see them.
You are playing with fire poster. Soon you will be the one even offering your virginity to him and begging him to take it. Then when you regret later,he turns it around on you and says you asked for it.
The best thing for you to do is to cut him off. I know it's gonna be hard. But this is a whole married man. It can't end well. Some men are so wicked ehnnn,he has totally sucked you in. He had the game plan from the start.
Mmm hmm. You are so right.
DeleteHe knew what he was doing from the get-go. Hahahahaha it's a game to him and you are his prey. It is all part of his excitement. He enjoys the thrill of it.
ReplyDeleteIv almost been in this situation before long ago just that mine wasn't married but in a serious relationship.. They make you fall in love with them and then tell you they have someone. By that time you are emotionally attached to them and it's hard to let go. They know if they tell you at the start,you won't even agree to see them.
You are playing with fire poster. Soon you will be the one even offering your virginity to him and begging him to take it. Then when you regret later,he turns it around on you and says you asked for it.
The best thing for you to do is to cut him off. I know it's gonna be hard. But this is a whole married man. It can't end well. Some men are so wicked ehnnn,he has totally sucked you in. He had the game plan from the start.
Olodo...pls let him bang u n break your waist, I'm sure u will enjoy it.
ReplyDeleteI sure he will injure her after breaking the waist.. 😂
DeleteWhy so vicious?
DeleteTear her pant join if possible😂😂.
DeleteYes, not only vicious, let him take Viagra n be brutal, she will forget her pant n run 😂😂😂😂
😂😂😂
DeleteLmao..@shege jagwa😁😁😁😁😁 Stella o😁
ReplyDeleteHe has been married before he even met you so don't allow that dry story has told you deceive you and I also bet you that that his house is not his place but where he takes you to.
ReplyDeleteContinue to catch feelings for a narcissistic man who should be facing his wife and children inugo? Don't go and invest your feelings into something more worthwhile. All I keep seeing is how deeply attracted he is to your body, lust is a powerful fleeting feeling. Leave that man alone
Narcissist is so true.
DeleteLMAO @Shegen jagwa! Stellz, U re a very funny lady...
ReplyDeleteNne, that guy never meant well from the beginning, he just wanted to have fun before getting married to his wife. Just imagine oo! he was actually engaged while he was chasing after U, promising marriage, jeez! I'm glad U didn't sleep with him though, else what U re feeling now would have been child's play compared to what U would have felt after love making, because then, a soul tie will be formed. That is my present predicament. I deal with the pain on the daily but it's gradually subsiding though, I thank God every morning for it...
These type of men re very sweet to the core! They allow U be yourself, talk & behave just as U please around them, having U believe U found a soul mate in them, hmmm!! I totally understand what U re going through babe... Couldn't have a conversation with anyone without subconsciously comparing, had myself drooling about how he touches & makes love to me. We would be talking to each other about anything and everything that comes to mind, couldn't keep our lips off each other's, or is it the stares we share? we'd automatically become horny when we look @each other, choi!!! I had to save myself oo! i'd be home alone craving more $ more of him, imagine! Until reality hit!!! Pulling away was like i was suffering withdrawal symptoms from drugs. Nne, it was badt! Please dont let this be your story...
If U cant block him because of conscience pricking U, then find something to quarrel about. Make sure though its something that TRULY affects U, reason been the disappointment U'd feel by his reaction to it would help in the moving on process. No relationship is ever that perfect, concentrate on any of his flaws that hurts U or a behaviour that doesn't go down well with U... START TODAY! Dont even think of buying time, U'd only be extending ur healing period...
Remember, this guy is now married & has nothing @all to lose messing around with U. Unfortunately, U on the other hand, has been enslaved mentally & emotionally. Except U wanna end up as his side chick for life though. Just know U'd never move on while still missing & thinking about him. I'm a fan of gradual process, not instant halting! the latter never works out fine.. Leaves U bitter for a very long time.
Good luck, baby girl... The Lord is ur strength!
Dont mind her, i'm sure shes lying... if they didnt have sex at all, he must have licked her, its rare to ve attached to someone that hasnt been inb/w ur legs
DeleteNo need to form quarrel , na to block am off after telling him that you cant continue the friendship becos he is married. gbam
DeleteLol @licked her.
DeleteIt is possible he may have done that to her. Thing is, she is attention starved and she is hooked on that, not necessarily the sex.
If she let's him go, who's going to send her cute texts or tell her how beautiful she is or listen to her rubbish conversations.
Problem is, she didn't vet him from the start. If she spent her time cross examining him their first month of knowing each other he would have fled calling her annoying and what not.
Hmmmmm! Poster you know you didn't tell us the gospel truth???? Anyway you better withdraw yourself from this man before it's too too late.
DeleteMust there be any quarrel? Find strength in the comments you get here today and block him all round. I mean everywhere possible then move on with your life because as it is now, dear poster you are playing with 🔥
DeleteHaa there's a need for the quarrel oo...
DeleteSomeone that is this addicted already, U think its easy to block & not wanna go back? Naa! U haven't been in such situation Kiks, the thing be like jazz, U won't even understand...
It was irritation that helped me, honestly! I began addressing things he was doing nonchalantly, things I ignored before because I didn't wanna lose him. His reactions became hurtful & disrespectful, hence the irritation. & it never used to be like that between us.. He became complacent probably because he felt he'd finally succeeded in sucking me in. Oh well... It made it easy for me to summon my will power to move on & was determined to keep moving...
Don't cut him off abruptly Nne, U'd be the one to suffer it most. As it is now, U both aren't on the same frequency. He's manipulating U, while U re innocently giving all ur love to him...
Destabilize his game too, as U re tryna help urself out. He may think U re just being unnecessarily in ur feelings, but he won't be aware of intention to bounce.. Allow him react naturally, trust me U'd be turned off on ur own sef!
This poster isn’t strong for the mission you want her to embark upon trust me 15:42. He would suck her in the more! Trust me when I say I have been there. One person helped me get through it and it was outright blocking. She has a whole army of a SDK BVs behind her. She will be fine if she chooses to.
DeleteIf gis ideas are now your ideas, you should also be thinking of getting married like him.
ReplyDeleteIts obvious that alot of girls think very shallow, see yesterdays chronicle and todays own.... its like theyre hypnotized when they fall in love
ReplyDeletePoster, you sound confused
ReplyDeleteAnd it seems you don't know what you want
You should blame yourself for the mess that you are in. You don't like someone, yet you decided to date him, you got to know about his engagement and still carried on.. .Haba mana!
ReplyDeleteShe's probably the type that gets toasters once every three years. So when it's that scarce, you've got to manage what is available.
DeleteSisi these days enhhh, well, lemme just pass with my cup of water, before I give somebori correct resetting slap. nonsenses and ingredients
ReplyDeleteAll these happened with a guy you just met "a few months back"? His ideas are now your ideas, you now believe in everything he believes in? All within a few months? Darling, it appears you had no identity and weak values even before you met this guy. You are not emotionally and psychologically mature enough to date. If a man you claim you haven't had sex with can get you this bent out of shape in about or less than 6 months, then there's something fundamentally wrong with your psyche. So if he sleeps with you, he will be able to recruit you as a suicide bomber, assuming he's affiliated with boko haram, since you've adopted his values and beliefs?
ReplyDeleteHe doesn't have you locked up, you are a slave to your own emotions. Now that he seems unavailable, your desire for him quadrupled, you've developed puppy love and you are going to be royally messed up if you don't get a grip on yourself. Sweetheart, I don't mean this as a insult, I'm merely stating the obvious, you have little or no value for yourself. If you did, you would not be okay being a sloppy second, waiting patiently for a married man and being at his beck and call. A man who, according to you, was single when he met you, yet got married while you were still in the picture and you say you don't care that he is married? Wow!
What I don't get is, if you met and fell in love with him a few months ago, when did you have the time to date other men? The truth is, you haven't tried dating other people, you just aren't ready to let go. Thank goodness you know he loves your body and not you. Very soon he will call for that body he loves so much and you will gladly submit. Just so you know, that will be the worst mistake ever!
Darling, it doesn't sound strange that you like the friendship the way it is, you have no respect for yourself and your womanhood. You are happy with the crumbs instead of the whole pie because you believe that's what you deserve. I'm not sure any advice will help you because you are not ready to leave him. Unfortunately, some people need to hit rock bottom and learn the hard way. Perhaps the tonic you need is for this lover boy to teach you a lesson you would never forget even if you develop amnesia. If you aren't smart enough to cut him off completely, he will end up being what your brain needs to reboot and the pain you will feel will be exquisite. Good luck.
e-hugs and kisses.
Damn! Be the truth has got to be said. Let's hope she listens to you because from the read of it, her vagina is about to be tendered on the alter of stupidity.
DeleteBlock him off ojare, he is married now so face ur front. Be determined and God will help you.
ReplyDeleteSomething similar is happening to me. i have one young guy that i like but his age is an issue to me. He likes me but not to the point of dating, i have tried forgetting about him but, its just hard. With time it will fizzle out sha.
ReplyDeleteSo what is the essence of this chronicle?
ReplyDeleteAn inexperienced girl like you want to become a side chick to a married man who married someone else instead of you?
As a veteran side chick,I pity you in advance because na osho free dem go do you las las!
Continue!😒
Hahahahhahahha...Tell her Side chick...Better keep that ur virginity for someone who deserves it..If they say make una get brain..Una no go gree...
Delete😁😁😁😁😁😁
DeleteHahhahaahhahaha , infact Stella no go kill person ooo.I was angry reading the chronicle but Stella made me smile at the end lol na really shege jagwa!
ReplyDeleteAnother conji stricken fool. Fuck make eye clear una , una no dey hear word. Virginity to prove point. You be virgin na it man dey romance your body.
ReplyDeleteYour type disgusts me.
You are just hanging on to the hymen for bragging rights. Now that this guy man has got your knickers all twisted up, what you gon do?
Can't you see that this is just a game? Him playing with you, feeling your arousal and knowing it's just a matter of time before you beg him to fuck you. Then he gets what he wanted all along with a clear conscience, after all , you asked for it.
You are almost there. My only advice is for you to take care and not fall pregnant cos that's when things will get really sour for you..
I'm sure you are a leader in church. Dumbo.
You didn't need to call her a fool to pass your message.
DeleteAll these girls claiming "i am a virgin" "he can't stop touching me" but will still go and spend the night in a man's place, na wa for una o. Confused humans. Abeg stop it!!! All these drama in a few months. You no get work?
ReplyDeleteAbeg, leave a married man alone.
Mtchewwww.walks out of post angrily.
ReplyDeleteI don't mean to be insensitive but this is so funny esp the last paragraph. Please cut him off,stop all forms of communication,change your number,if need be. Imagine him as a destiny destroyer,that wouldn't allow you move forward. There's one correct guy out there hoping you accept him and you're wasting time with a manipulator. If you feel he's using jazz, fast and pray.
ReplyDeleteI take time to love..once I noticed my love for u has entered ur brain n it's making u misbehave:issues arises,we break n make up frequently,forgive u,yet no change...n finally we call it quit..I will surely fall out of love with u..I no dey waste time ,will use all the bad things u did to hold against u e.g lies, abuse,cheating cases, disrespect etc.
ReplyDeleteBorrow yourself brain n leave that man alone. He is using u..Hope u not giving him money..
Don't tell u u don't know how to block him n cut all ties with him...Don't even remain friends cuz it's like chasing Shadows
Cut all ties with him.
ReplyDeleteWhen a woman thinks when she leaves a man, she won't get another man. Continue decieving yourself ooo. The veil go soon remove
ReplyDeleteYou don't need help, what you need is a resetting sound slap to reset your medulla oblongata.
ReplyDeletePoster close your legs and keep ur virginity give it only to ur husband I regretted breaking mine. Virgity comes with a lot of blessing
ReplyDeleteStay foolish you hear
ReplyDelete