Stella Dimoko Korkus.com: Chronicle Of Blog Visitor Narrative -UPDATE

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Friday, March 13, 2020

Chronicle Of Blog Visitor Narrative -UPDATE

Over don overtake overtake..............









Hmmh Stella. I am the lady that wrote somewhile back about my husband and I having a quarrel and I used the size of his dick to insult him. Well, we have finally gone our different ways and he has filed for divorce.



 Stella, to say that i'm heartbroke is an understatement. I still love this man. After he took his keys and left after the initial quarrel, he didn't come back for sometime. When he finally came back, this is after i frantically called and tried to check up on him, I went on my knees and apologised and wept. We both wept that day Stella, i really though it was over and my marriage had been restored. little did I know that he still had it in mind. He was very distant after that incident and he never agreed to sex which i always tried to initiate to makeup for everything.



He said he wanted a drama free divorce. He moved out early february, he left the house for me and 2 cars. He also said he will be paying monthly upkeep for our 2 kids. Stella, honestly i feel suicidal. i don't want all these things, I just want my husband back. I know I degraded him, but that was my first and only time. 


Our 2 kids miss him so much and they are always asking about him, they dont understand whats happening. Please pray for me. I could only open up to my mother about the genesis of our issue and she really scolded me. i received the divorce papers yesterday, honestly I am very sad. 

This man has been very good to me and my family. We talked about everything. My son looks up to him and my daughter sees him as her hero.

Pls pray for me, I am really considering suicide. I just want to end it all.




*You want to end it all because of a man?What will happen to your children?
Madam,please try your best to move on....

There is no way you would have used his manhood to insult him and still expect it to rise again!.......

I dont even know what to say again but i feel really really sad for you,however crying over spilt milk is not the solution.
I pray suicide thoughts stay far from your mind at this trying times.

176 comments:

  1. Stella where is the link of that chronicle?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Madame koinkoin aka the 'peace maker'13 March 2020 at 16:08

      I Pray he comes back to his family, poster I pray he loves you again . for now put yourself together for the sake of your kids. Who die no go come back o.

      Delete
    2. This matter no reach to divorce na.. Haba!
      Poster, pls be good, be safe.. Be strong for you and your kids.. #love & lights. ❤️

      Delete
    3. i still remember the chronicle...

      Delete
    4. Poster I hate to say this but let's be honest with ourselves YOU HUSBAND HAS AN UNFORGIVING SPIRIT.

      People say hurtful things when they are angry but to throw a thriving marriage away because you his wife insulted him begs the question of "Did he ever love you at all".
      I ask because true love demands that we forgive when it is asked of us.

      For now don't sign the divorce papers and stop begging him.
      Give him space and start planning for life alone with the kids.
      You made a mistake but don't let this mistake define you...Forgive yourself for your sanity sake and just take it one day at a time.

      Also stop telling people the reason for your split so one day they don't go and use it to abuse him.

      True love includes forgiveness, so in my opinion he never truely loved you, so don't go and die over what you cannot change.
      It will hurt less with each passing day.you will be fine

      LEP😛

      Delete
    5. I wonder o Oyinyechukwu what if he is the one that body shame the wife won't the wife forgive him. For me there is more to this.

      Delete
    6. your husband is very wicked,and unforgiving,manhood size insult that my dh has been collecting since 20 years,in fact yesterday while he was bathing,I told him is like your gbola has grown big oo,and he laughed and said I'm yabbing my big head,that the gbola has given me enough children,the truth is that I always wondered how I would cope with the size he had,we dated for years,got married and my cu*t adjusted to the size,to the extent that he finds it difficult to enter sometimes,even after 5children, I won't even blame you,cos I have said same thing to my hubby,and he will still be the one to apologise,I deeply feel for you,and pray he has a change of heart regarding the divorce, be strong dear.

      Delete
    7. Poster please just move on. Your horseband was looking for an excuse long ago, and you fell right into it. He has got a side chicken when you both are still under the same house. He was looking for a reason to leave.
      Madam move on, and stop regretting over what has happened. Don't go and fall into depression and starts popping pills for the rest of your life. Look after yourself and beautiful children.
      This life is too short to be unhappy, no be you say make he get small d**k na?
      Abegi!..
      No go kill your beautiful self oooo, then the man don win be that. Abeg turn this regretting into motivating yourself, you are strong💪💪, and beautiful woman . Your children look up to you. So be strong for your children, and don't let them down!🤗

      Delete
    8. The real reason he divorced u is not cos of penis or insult anything ! He had been looking for a way to run away Nd found d perfect excuse. So if he had said ur jajaina is too wide u wud v divorced him too? Yes u go vex but divorce ? U sef reason d matter . Stop acting like he is d author Nd finisher of ur faith. I know it’s hard but fam u v to move on . If u hire a private investigator u might find out he has another family , side chick or bro he always wanted to move on with. Or mayb u did something else u dint tell us? But this penis matter no make brain at all. Divorce bcos of gbola? Hain !

      Delete
    9. Poster, if your story is as it really happened and the insult wasn't a last straw, one of 2 things may be happening:
      1. There's another woman somewhere...
      2. There's a MAN somewhere, yes a MAN. Gay guys marry, have one or 2 kids and then bail out on the most ridiculous excuses because they never wanted to be with a woman in the first place...

      Delete
    10. Pls people,can someone help with link to the initial chronicle ?

      Delete
    11. You peoples don't understand the implications of insulting a man with his manhood size.. Some people can kill because of it.

      Delete
    12. Anonymous 18:20,yes a woman that loves ,like the size of his penis .

      Delete
    13. Flint: A man with a low self esteem will only find that very insultive to the extent of not forgiving his partner...I have always yab my hubby with the size of his D and we usually laugh over it like its nothing because his defense has always been D that has been giving me joy back to back is what am yabbing...to me I don't see any big deal with the poster Chronicle..guess Mr Man was only looking for a way out and d wife fell into it.

      Delete
    14. I disagree withost of you they say the husband doesn't love her. You heard her ..he is leaving everything for her. Two cars, house and the children. The man is only broken he can't bring himself still sleeping with his wife. That who he is.. Love is not everything. You women have also askes "na love we go chop"

      Delete
    15. People respond to issues differently, I was body shamed too by my husband,it's been 3yrs I have not gotten over it yet,I don't know if I will ever get over it, since then our sex life almost zero, even when he try I don't feel anything.Am there because of my children nothing more. Let Watch the things we say

      Delete
    16. Anonymous 16:51, if your husband didn’t have a good-sized manhood, trust me he wouldn’t find it funny. He knows he is endowed, and your write up confirms it, so your insult doesn’t count here.

      Delete
  2. Replies
    1. firstly I think your husband needs to revamp of his mindsey, he needs to stop seeing the size of his manhood as an insult. That is what he was given and he should work with it. I am sure if you had told him he was too big it would boost his EGO. They might be another reason for the divorce that he isnt telling you.

      Delete
    2. I wonder if he ever loved you,divorce because of manhood insult?don't sign the divorce paper's yet and keep begging him,send him SMS,telling him how he means the world to you,ask God to touch his stony heart,and give him a change of heart,there is no hopeless case with God,I have said worse things to my hubby and he just tells me,I have forgiven you,we would laugh over it and move on,this your husband is strong hearted,be strong for your children.

      Delete
    3. Poster divorce? Just like that? That's quite harsh and unfair!
      All the same, I believe divorce is better than murder. I say this because, it's becoming obvious you don't know his makeup or what he's capable of. So please, sign those papers because you never know, a reconciliation can lead to him stabbing you multiple times in your sleep...

      Delete
    4. Poster you should give your husband some time before you sign the divorce papers to see if he will change his mind.

      You have be littled your husband and want him to forget about what you said and move on as if nothing happened. So that tomorrow your mouth will run like tap again.

      Foolishness is when you cannot control your mouth or anger. Some things are better not said.

      Now you will continue to blame yourself for your failed marriage. Learn to move on, channel all your energy on your children. Committing suicide is not the solution but rather thàt will bring more pains to your innocent children.

      Delete
  3. Stella's second paragraph is comically true.
    He has an unforgiving spirit, a lot of couples have said worse and are still together.

    OP, forgive yourself and move on. 🤗

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I feel for her and kids are involved I pray he changes his mind

      Delete
    2. Gaskiya a very unforgiving spirit..What the hell...Poster I believe that you have learnt your lesson but move on..That man never loved you at all and its sad..Please pick your pieces and move on with your life!! How can you kill yourself because of a selfish, unforgiven man...Best believe you will surely meet a man that will truly love you till then think about your kids and see a therapist..

      Delete
    3. Perxian.. Everybody is not the same.. The Cat you used as pet, can be another person's enemy..

      Delete
    4. I have abused my husbands genitals and am still married. 18 years and counting. He’s just an unforgiving man. Sorry

      Delete
    5. I totally agree.. The man is very unforgiving. She did wrong, but since she apologized he should have forgiven her even if it's for the sake of their children..

      But that means the man must have felt very insecure about his manhood and hearing it from his wife totally broke him.. Madam, please stay alive for your kids, suicide can't never be the solution.

      Delete
    6. Unforgiving spirit you say? Well people see things differently and handle them likewise.
      Not everyone has the will to tolerate some kind of insults. Back then when we were kids, a neighbour living in the next compound to ours, killed the husband accidentally the next time the husband wanted to gbensh her. After calling her a deep wide well days before. He pushed the man away from touching her and the rest was history.

      Psychologically most people are emotionally weak. Especially when issues of their pride is trampled. A funny, joke full partner would have tolerated the insult by giving her a shut up sex. Their next time at it. So kindly understand people's psych before spitting fire - for some words burn indelibly without scar but a hurtful pain.

      Delete
    7. Ola, very true. However, even enemies can be forgiven.

      Delete
    8. 16.09 a marriage without mutual respect is no marriage. It's not by number of years.

      Delete
    9. @Perxian staunch one oooo.

      Delete
    10. The man is very wicked jare, couples jokes with almost everything. Men are too egocentric, they can abuse their wives with their physical appearance but they can't take what they dish out.

      Poster, please stay strong, let him try another one who will even use it to abuse him publicly and on SM, then he will come back on his knees to beg you





      *Larry was here*

      Delete
    11. Abi ó. There is more to it. The poster should just be strong for her kids.

      Delete
    12. Ebony Oge, your story reaffirms my opinion on unforgiving spirit. Had the aggrieved wife forgiven her husband, he would still be alive.

      Delete
  4. You messed up but it's not the end of the world.
    You have to focus on raising those 2 lovely kids and let go.
    Learn from your mistakes.

    ReplyDelete
  5. So sad...your hubby was too emotional but you need to get going

    ReplyDelete
  6. Your husband is not a forgiving person. If the reverse was the case, I am sure you would have forgiven him readily.
    What is marriage without forgiveness when a partner offends the other?

    You made the mistake and felt remorseful so what's his grouse again?

    Pray for healing and move on abeg.

    Is your hubby the overtly quiet type?

    I fear those people wella, once you hurt them they hardly find it in their hearts to truly forgive.

    ReplyDelete
  7. hmm.. God will touch his heart to let go. He was deeply hurt. Keep apologising to him and if there is anyone close to him that you feel can talk to him, approach the person but don't tell the person what you said to him that hurt him. You need to stay strong for your kids, drive that suicidal thoughts far from you.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. No need to apologise again. The man has made his mind. He surely has a side chicken.

      Delete
  8. Hmmmmmm.

    He that keepeth his tongue, keepeth his life.

    You have no idea how long something you say can stay in someone's mind.

    You shattered his ego with your tongue.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Is anyone perfect? We have all said some nasty things as well..This does not warrant divorce abeg..

      Delete
    2. Ur second paragraph i like. I try not to insult my husband each time we have issues, I contributes 90% finance in running the home, he is a good man and does not have, but I will never say a word that will put him down, bcos I know he is not happy that I am the one carrying the burden alone, so let's all be careful on what we say a times for peace sake.

      Delete
    3. The man is heartless, juat dust your feet and move on. If he meets another woman and there is talk about his manhood, he should move on and continue moving.

      Delete
    4. He is unforgiving, let him go, please put yourself together.

      Delete
    5. Wise woman @ Ursula

      Delete
    6. Yes she is wrong we all agreed to that but is this the way out. I hope he has never wrong anyone in his entire life. The woman his sorry at least with the same dick they have two kids, he should realize she said it in moment of anger and she is sorry about it.

      Delete
  9. Madam you have to move on. He is a man and has ego, you really messed up but you have learn't your lessons, so just see it as one of those things. The man is really a good man but I don't think he can come back again. May God comfort you

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Ok messed up? Agreed but really messed up ..No!! Everyone makes mistakes but he chose to go the extreme..

      Delete
  10. Wow poster,so sorry to hear this. Words hurt like hell! I can still remember hurtful words spoken to me as a child even till now as an adult.
    Keep praying for restoration,there's nothing God cannot do. Fast and pray. It's well with you.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yeah, I guess he already had a serious complex about his size and the poster stepped on an open wound. He could have responded that she was too wide. He could have said the little pinky made two children. He could have reminded her how she can't go without seeing little Mr do good for three days straight. But those words sent him straight back to boardinghouse, hiding to bathe alone because he saw he was smaller than his friends who thought they were small. It took him back to his first time and how the girl kept avoiding him after she couldn't feel anything all night. He went back to all she and other exes may have said after they ghosted him and guy man just broke.

      Poster, I don't want to sound cliche but it's not you. It's him- that doesn't make him a bad person but a good guy with demons he has not yet won. Oga is hurt and has been damaged for a long time. I guess what he cherished most about you was that you'd ignore his size-his biggest insecurity. That comment shattered that hope and left him naked. I don't think there is another woman- I don't think it would be that easy for him to pull his pants down even for a professional prostitute for a while. Unless he can fall for a woman who will say she sees it and accepts it but would he believe her?

      He'll even be very broken and afraid the cause of your split may leak- that's why he wants a drama free divorce. He is willing to pay to have his secret kept. I don't think you're the only one who is suicidal. I also hope he doesn't hurt himself.

      Hopefully, both of you will find love and safety in your new relationships going forward.

      Delete
    2. @18:54 God bless you

      Delete
    3. @18:54. Wow. Your comment is spot on. All the Bvs shouting he has side chicken and unforgiving blah blah. That is most likely not the case.
      Joking with a mans gbola size, especially a little sized one is a very sensitive issue .it can break him down completely . Except he has a very healthy dose of self esteem. He must have been battling with inferiority complex .His wife pushed the knife in and twisted it. He might not have the emotional power to come back from that type of hurt .

      Woman you need to get on your knees and pray for God to restore your marriage . its as good as dead .

      On 2 the Next!

      Delete
  11. This is so sad. Too many HAD I KNOWN thoughts would have played around in your head.

    I have no words to say to soothe your emotional and mental pain. All I can say, may GOD comfort you and give you the strength to get through and pass this.

    Your story is a lesson to me: I have to be more careful what I say when I'm pissed or angry so it doesn't come back to hurt me.

    This too shall pass!

    ReplyDelete
  12. Oh, what a sad story!! It's a pity it came to this. One thing I know is that men don't take it lightly when you make them feel small about their manhood. It breaks them when someone they love says that to them.
    Reminding him about his size and making him understand he couldn't satisfy you was the height of it.
    No matter how mad you are, there are certain things you just don't say. Some women need to learn to bridle their tongues. Your husband is the quiet type from how you described him the other time, you don't know the damage you did to him when you mocked him with his size.
    You made him feel he isn't man enough for you, now he's giving you freedom to look for a bigger and better size.

    Sluttychic.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. We've all one time or another said something in the heat of anger that we didn't mean.

      To err is human, to forgive is divine.

      Delete
    2. Is that why they couldnt seat down like adults and share his pains about his wife's actions/words, resolve and move forward..Please everyone has said worst and hurtful things she has apologized..The guy has an unforgiving heart period!!

      Delete
  13. Madam, please dont end it o, because of your children please.
    As for your hubby, hnmmmm you destroyed his self esteem by using the size of his dick to insult him, things can never remain the same. It's only God that can change his mind, keep praying. It is well

    ReplyDelete
  14. On a second thought madam, this man here has already moved on before your insult came in he was just waiting for the right moment you will misbehave so as to heap the blame on you.
    Marriage is all about forgiveness, is not as if you taut him with his blokos every now and then, it was just once and you sincerely apologized.
    Please be strong for your children and learn from this. All the best and try to see if he can change his mind if not please move on.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. The man didn't make up his mind before anything..

      To insult a man that he has short prick? That he can't satisfy you?

      It means a lot of statement oo..

      You can try it sha and let's see

      Delete
    2. Thank you my dear Candix..Everyone is blaming the woman even those that say worse things..Poster he has an unforgiving spirit let him be abeg..

      Delete
    3. Why do you think he already moved on hcore the insult?
      Some people are like that. What makes you think he isn't hurting? Just as cheating is a deal breaker for some, this one is a deal breaker for him.

      Sluttychic.

      Delete
    4. @Olawealth if truly that man love his wife and children a divorce shouldn't be the case, since she has apologized.

      Delete
    5. @Phoenix his unforgiving spirit is topnotch.

      Delete
  15. Whoever he dates will still know that it is small and be enduring silently. The woman will be faking orgasm to please him. Men are selfish. They have comma yet they will be insulting a woman for having small nyash and na dem go want woman with big front and back when dem no get big thing

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. You think all women enjoy it big?

      Delete
    2. Exactly...my ex can look at waist ehnnnn. And he made me so insecure when he came back from dubai last year. And he has small JT, don't mind them.

      If the reverse was the case nko. Madam poster, I can understand what it's like to watch ur marriage crumble.
      But if that is what he wants, let him go. Bear one thing in mind, even if he reconciles with you, things will never be the same. Malice keeping will be there. Indifference to ur emotions amongst others.
      Let him go.
      Lick ur wounds and dry ur tears. The mistake has been done. If he truly loves you and seeing the remorse you showed he shouldn't have filed for divorce.
      Be that as it may, be strong for your children

      Delete
    3. Did she not know it was small before she married him? It's not about knowing though, it's about her making him feel worthless. People react differently.

      Sluttychic.

      Delete
  16. Replies
    1. Yes the woman killed him with those words.. He may never get out for it for life.
      Because you say it to your husband at home, does not mean it's right and other men should take it and laugh over it. Know what and what not to say when you're angry.

      Delete
  17. You didn't know the consequence 0f your action when you were running your mouth ?
    Did iu asked for prayer or advice before you embarrassed him with those words of yours?
    I don't have any pity for you, I just hope others like you will learn from this but not just read and forget the lesson.
    I'm gonna do just exact same thing if I was in his shoes.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yeah cos you are very immature u dont need to spell it..

      Delete
    2. If you are going to do the same thing if you are in the man's shoes then I suggest you shouldn't bother getting married at all.
      Marriage is for 2 matured minded people who are willing to put in the work to make it successful and one of the requirements of marriage is forgiveness.

      Don If you know that you don't have the spirit of forgiveness in you, don't bother getting married.

      LEP😛

      Delete
    3. You always come under my comment to rant. I know you will tell me just what you're looking for very soon.
      I see your type all the time. @phoenix

      Delete
    4. Lolzz like how..Looking for what in someone that is very archaic and backward in thoughts..I dont roll with myopic people..You are just one timid guy who behaves like a lion that you are not..Shift one side abeg..

      Delete
    5. LEP we all should know out boundary, what and what not to say to each other.

      If the man was the one that body shamed her or if she was yet to give birth and he called her barren, móst of you would have asked for his head on a plate.

      You all just looking for ways to blame the man but I can't blame him because I don't know how you want the man to have sex with the same woman that abused him with his organ..

      Delete
    6. I only responded to you this time around because you have been looking for my attention since but be sure you can't have that privilege again.
      You have said so many things but I refused to respond to you, you came with an apology last week but I did not acknowledged it, now you're back again because you're not happy that I blanked you.
      Stay away and roll with your set @phoenix

      Delete
    7. What is this Don feeling like. Notice me on blog
      Smh.

      Delete
  18. Thanks nne for getting back to us. I do hope that other chronicle writers will do same.
    Suicide? Mbanu, you will punish your two kids. You do not know the woman that will raise them.
    And how about eternity?
    I know I told you some hard truths that same day and received a lot of arrows from ndi uta...

    My aunt will always tell me that the mouth said, let's cut off the head... not knowing that she is part of the head.
    Now, you can see that all the cars and houses and money on earth is not
    worth it. The man is the real deal. And he appears to me a good dude from all you have written. A lot of dudes will not even allow you to touch those kids not to talk about raising them.
    My advice here is to mourn (fasting, Scriptures, praying to Jesus). Yes, you need him now for only he can change or turn the heart of a king.
    Yes, the husband is king, he is the head of the house and God made him so.
    Proverbs 21:1 The king's heart is in the hand of the LORD, as the rivers of water: he turneth it whithersoever he will.

    Yes, the Lord can make him miss you and the kids too.
    🤗🤗🤗🌹🌹🌹🌹😘😘

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. ANG, a good dude will also forgive those that trespass against us as The Lord taught us.

      Delete
    2. @Perxian
      Yes, that is why I believe it is not all over yet.
      That is why I wrote that Scriptures and my last line.
      Note that being "good" does not mean "being a Christian" . i.e. being in Christ.
      I do hope that my Naija girls will learn some very important lessons from this
      blog like I do. Some of them pitiably come here to fight and insult. 😢😢

      Delete
    3. She should mourn...Did somebody die. Then you go on to say some dudes will not even allow you to touch or raise their kids...Please how so, look women don't need any man's permission to raise their kids, so quit the mentality of his doing her a favour by letting her keep her kids.

      She messed up we all agree but how about you addressing the husbands unforgiving spirit...If God can forgive why then can't a husband forgive his wife.

      The husband has issues, he has a small Dick...That is a fact and the wife saying it out loud shouldn't be seen as a crime.



      LEP😛

      Delete
    4. @LEP
      I understand you very well 🤐🤐
      I am talking about the Nigerian circumstance of the man
      muscling the kids away. It happens..
      Please nne dear, the husband did not write us a chronicle for advice.
      I am talking to my fellow woman, wife and mother who is hurting to the point
      of suicide because she just discovered that her husband (whom she insulted) means
      the whole wide world to her. She has cars, houses, kids etc. but she still needs
      her husband above all these.
      The fact that you DECIDED to LEP does not mean that a lot of us ladies do not value
      marriage and our husbands.
      As for the mourning aspect, become a Christian, receive Jesus into your life, begin reading
      his teachings and you will invariably understand it.
      Thanks for reading me inugo? 😊🌹🌹😘😘

      Delete
    5. @LEP
      Matthew 9:15
      Jesus replied, "How can the guests of the bridegroom MOURN while He is with them?
      But the time will come when the bridegroom will be taken from them; then they will FAST.

      Delete
    6. What if his next wife or girl friend says the same thing to him in another moment of hot argument or range he will keep moving or accept his faith and make his promise never to say that again. Iranu.

      Delete
  19. In marriage it's best to have a forgiving spirit because your spouse would definitely upset you at some point. Some men are emotionally weak. A woman came to my mother some years back to complain that during their usual brawl her husband made mention of her flat boobs. That he doesn't enjoy it and she felt insulted considering she gave him four boys. They settled and everyone went home. The table is turned and your man wants a divorce. He wants to throw his beautiful home aside for his ego. You have apologised so there is nothing else you can do and if he refuses to listen then it's on him. Don't beat yourself further.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you my sister..No one is perfect thats why my mum will say when courting it shouldnt be all about laughing all the time allow for some sort of quarell and from there you will see the true character of the person..

      Delete
  20. "...and I used the size of his dick to insult him" so you dont know that men with "small prick" have inferiority complex? alot of thing must have ran thru his mind...Leave him let him go cos he will NEVER EVER forgive u NEVER. And if he does ehn he would make the marriage living hell for you . Please LET HIM GO!

    How are ya'all doing?
    Congrats Ekajoy... my fellow abroad wife.

    Joblesshousewife
    Tear bra tear pant
    hehehe

    ReplyDelete
  21. Na wa oo. Marriage is all about forgiveness. True love forgives. Yes , you did wrong by insulting him but its not enough for divorce. Where is the love he felt for you. He didn't even think of his kids and his love for him. He abandoned them. Are you sure your husband has not been wanting to leave before now and you only played into his hands by misyarning. Anyway, pray to God. I believe God can sort you guys out. Don't you guys have pastors or elderly people he respects that cam sort this out for you

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Exactly my thoughts. He has been waiting for her to misbehave so as to dump her. He didn't even consider his kids and the love they both shared.

      Delete
    2. 👌,He needed a reason to dump the poster. Madam poster please move on, and look after yourself.

      Delete
  22. I feel for you sis. We women really need to watch our mouth when talking to our men.
    What is said is said, you just need to forgive yourself and move on.
    Dont kill yourself biko, be strong for your kids and let him be.
    Stay strong.

    ReplyDelete
  23. You can hold back from signing the papers while you keep begging him... If it dies work then move on... Maturity us knowing what you say when quarreling with a person..

    ReplyDelete

  24. Because of that he wants to divorce? After all the begging too?
    What about men who tell their wives to their face about having a loose vagina.

    Devil is a liar!

    The devil is taking advantage of this issue and magnifying it.

    Fast and pray while you continue begging him and refuse the divorce.

    Don't tell any family member.


    USE YOUR PAIN WISELY
    PRAY WITH YOUR WHOLE HEART
    ASK GOD FOR MERCY
    CRY OUT TO GOD DEEPLY WITH YOUR OWN WORDS
    PRAY TO FIND MERCY IN GOD AND YOUR HUSBANDS FACE
    CALL YOUR MARRIAGE BACK
    AFTER PRAYERS GO TO HIS OFFICE WITH HIS FAVOURITE FOOD
    DONT BE TEMPTED TO GIVE UP IF YOU DONT SEE INSTANT RESULTS,CONTINUE TO PERSIST
    DO THIS EVERY DAY UNTIL HE COMES BACK HOME.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Office ke,poster don't let the man fool you in his office.

      Delete


    2. Poster,I pray for you that the Lord will soften your husband's heart to forgive you. The deed us done.
      But the word of God Says that "The Lord holds the heart of kings/Men and he turns it to any direction he want
      Heavenly father will show you mercy and restore your marriage,as you have showed remorse in Jesus name,Amen.

      Please do not take your life

      Delete


    3. Poster,I pray for you that the Lord will soften your husband's heart to forgive you. The deed us done.
      But the word of God Says that "The Lord holds the heart of kings/Men and he turns it to any direction he want
      Heavenly father will show you
      mercy and restore your marriage,as you have showed remorse in Jesus name,Amen.

      Please do not take your life

      Delete
    4. Haaa poster no near e office oo. If u no want beating and disgrace.

      Chai see advise

      Delete
    5. What's bad about the advice?

      So bringing your husband lunch in his office will cause beating at this level?
      Disgrace is what she should be scared about now at this point or him seeing she is truly sorry.
      Poster! Only you knows where it pinches and how badly you want your marriage back. Do all you can to secure your home please. Even if it's to stand every day begging him in front of his office abeg do! At least that's the place you know he won't miss.

      Delete
  25. This is not easy for the man people. He may not feel comfortable with his wife anymore and will arbor some hatred for her, this may also lead to the marriage deteriorating. Moving on his his best way of dealing with this. The woman made a mistake and is now faced with the consequences. I dont know what she can do to get her man back but no matter what happens, everything will never remain the same again. Pray about this always, write him about how u feel, your suicidal thoughts and your children. But you must now accept the new reality of life and try to move on if it does not work out.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Not easy for him to hear that his dick is small..really? 🤔
      His dick is small is a FACT.
      He knows it.
      His wife knows it.

      Granted, it really hurt him but another person must have told him and he didn't die. Let's stop exaggerating the offense.

      Delete
    2. Let him go, his next woman will still abuse him with it then he can keep moving like leave on water that doesn't have moment of rest. A weakling calling himself a man. Ojú obinrin má ń rí nkan lọwọ ọkùnrin.

      Delete
    3. The guy has a complex but also, he is rather selfish and for a small man, a tad proud. Uncle, the kini is small and even a blind woman who isn't a virgin will come to that conclusion. She told you what you already know and forgetting that she has faked orgasms for years to make you feel good, you forgot her keeping quiet and even praising you when you know you can't earn it. You forgot the children. You carried your massive complex/ego and left. For a blind ghost that can't see or feel the situation on ground? How many women will you run from because they told you the truth in a moment of weakness?

      Madam, perhaps you're remembering issues wrongly. Could there be something else? I don't think it's another woman- I'll be surprised he has enough self-confidence to cheat but was he depressed prior to this argument y'all had? Were there underlying issues in the marriage you has assumed were normal?

      Delete
  26. He must have been really shattered. You need to move on a d take the lessons. And for those with caustic tongues on this blog it is a lesson to you. The kind of vile words over minor disagreements makes me cringe. If you truly love a person you would ne reluctant to hurt them no matter what happens. I can tell you this for free after 18 years of marriage. Have I felt like tello g my husband some damaging words to get back during a fight, yes. Did I stop myself: yes. A d after the fight I was always glad I didnt say those words. And now over 5ye years I don't even feel the urge to use those words no matter the disagreement

    ReplyDelete
  27. Don't sign the papers yet. Some people take time to forgive and heal.He might be that type.

    Continue pleading g with him, pray and if there's someone he listens to, please get the person involved.

    Don't commit suicide because you have your kids to take care of. In all, I hope you've learnt your lesson.

    May God intervene and heal your home.

    ReplyDelete
  28. Stella have said it all. There's no way his manhood will rise towards the wife again. There is no amount of sxx they made, the man will always feel the wife is not satisfied and that she will still insult him on that again. So the best for them is to go their separate ways.

    ReplyDelete
  29. Too sad! where are all the relationship advisers, step forward, others fuck off**


    JUDGE & JURY

    ReplyDelete
  30. please for the sake of your children seek help from somewhere either, See a counselor or a Therapist pleaseeeee. Don't carry that burden alone. You have apologized for your error and he has refused to forgive....it is not your cross to carry. May God hold you through this dark season.

    side note: No man can create a single part of the body...so let's stop talking down on people because of their body part...that they can do nothing about. And most importantly
    Marriage is between two forgivers. Bear that in mind as you enter yours.

    ReplyDelete
  31. I have called my husband and compared him to worse things that i left home with my kid for a year. Whenever relatives try interfering,i insult them as well cos i was literally tired of everything.Guess what he kept trying hard just to make everything work again. In a nutshell,once there is true love,there's bound to be forgiveness. Please madam live for your children,channel your energy into making yourself a better person,time heal all wounds no matter how deep the scar is.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. That is a man and not this akebaje.

      Delete
    2. Your story is different.In this case the man has always been a good husband who probably thinks his accepted him for eho he is and with his small kini Alas the shock

      Delete
  32. Your husband doesn't have a forgivable spirit, period.

    I have said that to my husband before out of annoyance, and we are still happily married after 10 years. People say annoying stuff when they are angry, and if claim you love someone you should forgive.

    Well, it's better he leaves than staying in an unhappy marriage. Don't kill yourself because of a man.

    ReplyDelete
  33. So sorry.

    Does his hurt trump his love for you? Did he really love you? Was what you said so bad that he cannot forgive and prefers to abandon his kids and let them grow up with a constant father figure in their lives?

    I am sorry but your husband is wicked. Can he swear that he has never offended anyone since he was born? How about God? If God kept a record of our sins, who will survive? (Psalm 130 vs 3).

    Wipe your tears. This will pass.

    ReplyDelete
  34. Madam pls calm down becos like every other storm this too shall pass, take each day at a time, there's a lesson in this, besides this problem is suppose to make you better as a person then as a wife, through Prayer GOD will restore your marriage, pls don't sign the divorce papers yet, don't let go easily, beg him in fact call people he looks upto to beg on your behalf, i use to have quick and unbridled tongue like you before but GOD took me through the process were it almost cost me my job, am not what i should be yet but am soooo much better than that terrible person i used to be, pls don't judge yourself too harshly becos many of us have done worse but GOD by His mercies washed us from our filth and we are work in progress.

    ReplyDelete
  35. Babygirl, don’t sign the divorce papers. This is the time to embrace God. Start fasting and praying for God to restore your marriage. After sometime, as Holy Spirit directs you, visit him with and beg him again. Go with an elderly one(spiritual father he listens to in my opinion) and plead again and again. It won’t be easy but victory will be yours later.
    No matter what, remove guilt from yourself. It’s okay to make mistakes and talk out of them.
    Ps: Never ever sign those papers no matter what.
    I pray God strengthens you

    ReplyDelete
  36. I feel really sorry for you and your family. I pray God touches your husband to forgive you. Families have had worst and they are still together. Continue asking for your husband's forgive. I really hope he forgives you.

    ReplyDelete
  37. Abeggiiiii!!!!!! Pls commit suicide on top what???!!! Please let him go joor. If this didn't end the marriage another trivial issue would have. If he said that your vagina feels like borehole or he feels like he is drowning in it, you would never even think of divorcing him, never! Ehn let him go, somebody else would deal with his small penis, I mean you did not lie nah. He would also be ashamed to tell people why he wants a divorce. Trust me, this one would pass. Marriages end all the time, it is not the end of the world. You are not a bad woman, you slipped and said things out of anger.I am sure you were a good wife too until you told him the truth and destroyed his ego. He is unforgiving and that is his personal problem. We locomote!

    ReplyDelete
  38. It's not easy o. for some men all you have to do is insult or disrespect them once and that is it. some will give you many chances and be plotting their exit while you think you have forgiven them. the way love and affection is so important to a woman is the way RESPECT is to a man o. Once Respect is out a man is out as well. infact a man will rather his wife respect him than love him sef because that is every man's love language. without respect, that man can't stay there long o unless he is getting something EXTRA and he will be making the woman's life hell

    I learned my lesson in a hard way. Of course those men were not really anything to write home about but to me then it wasn't funny o. but NOW i KNOW better so that when true God-given man comes I won't destroy it with disrespect. i learned how to interact with men very late as I was shielded and went to all girls secondary school. the way you interact with your fellow woman/girlfiends is so different from the way you interact with a man especially a man you are involved with romantically. I learned that one late o even from bad men and now Good man no go escape my grip :D Hope you have learned the lesson.

    funny enough this man may not even be the best man for you. he may just be your learning canvas because one small thing you did to him and he japa. no it's not right. well I suggest you leave him alone for now, keep contact strictly to involve just your kids. do NOT beg him, do not stalk him, do not make his life your business. focus on improving yourself, pray for him to come back if it is God's will or for God to send a better man, the best man for you so you won't feel this man's absence

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Anon 16:21 you captured the crux of the matter.

      Men thrive on RESPECT.
      Women thrive on LOVE and CARE.
      Sex is also an essential part of man's psychological makeup. For men sexual connection is often necessary to feel safe enough for emotional vulnerability.

      Ladies marry a man you could respect.

      Don't instruct a man as you would a child. Men love to be in charge. It's part of their essence.

      I have a very calm and gentle man who has never raised his voice at me. However, lately he told me I should know he is a man and I should ask to speak when he is done because I know the class of men he deals with. (I was getting impatient with him doing things the same way for a long time and pulling me into it at the last minute for support).
      Well, it was a surprise and learning point for me.

      He hasn't changed his approach to those things yet but voluntarily, he told me he learnt something from an interview granted by a notable Nigerian.
      I pray he applies it too. Watching with my mouth shut. 🤐😊

      Delete
  39. I'm so sorry madam. We have said so many hurtful things to one another one way or the other. What of some things some of these parents say to their kids?? I would say do not sign the divorce papers yet, but even if u guys get back together, the sex life will never remain the same. He will keep remembering the words u said to him. I will keep saying these, women are strong. A lot have passed through fire and they came out stronger. See the way a lot of husbands/bfs complain about saggy boobs, stretch marks, tummy fat etc. But small gbas gbos about the size of their dicks they lose it. Stay safe poster

    ReplyDelete
  40. Phoenix, why are you all over everyone's comments? We don't all have to agree.

    ReplyDelete
  41. I'm so sorry, sweetheart. That's the thing with words, spoken or written, once expressed, they can't be taken back. Even more frightening is the fact that you can't quite predict how a person would react to a particular statement. Your words emasculated your hubby and obviously hit a major nerve. I can't adjudge him as overreacting because people react to things differently. What Mr. A laughs off, is what Mr. B may have a cardiac arrest over.

    Legally speaking, no judge would grant his divorce petition if he only moved out February 2020. Secondly, if you guys reside in Nigeria, there are certain grounds for divorce that, at least, one must be cited and proved by tendering credible evidence before a judge will grant his petition. From your initial story, there's no legal justification for this divorce. Even when the are legal grounds for a divorce and the court sees that one party is truly remorseful and doesn't want the marriage to end, unless there is imminent threat to the other spouse's life, the courts would normally insist on reconciliation for at least 6 months.

    Darling, the tricky part is, do you really want to be with a man who no longer wants to be with you? As bad as it hurts, the best thing for you now is to give him the space he needs. Struggling to hold on to him will further infuriate him. Let him go, give him enough time to miss you. If what you guys had was solid and genuine enough, he will come back to you. I have seen couples who divorced for over a decade, come back and remarry. Some even a year or two later.

    Asking you to move on is highly unrealistic, you are dealing with so many strong emotions right now, like guilt, sadness, shame, regret, you name it. A cacophony of negative emotions, that's the reason you feel suicidal, you're in a very dark headspace. However, my darling, suicide is the worst thing you can do to yourself and your kids. Hang in there and allow yourself feel every emotion. No shortcuts, go through it all, so you can truly heal. One thing I can assure you is, it will get better with each passing day. This is your husband, the father of your kids and the man you love, darling you just don't get over that as though it were a burnt pot of your favourite food. This is emotional and psychological stress, it will take time but you will come out of this a stronger and better woman. Just don't give up on yourself. It may feel like the end of the world but, I assure you, it is not. Your best days are still ahead. Chin up, sis. While there's life, hope abounds.
    e-hugs and kisses.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. 👍👍👏. Plus poster, please seek out psychological help to keep you going in this period and books on handling divorce or separation. They may help you.

      Delete
  42. I remember your chronicle vividly and I have always hoped you had both moved past it. Your remorse was so genuine as it still is. I know it may be hard but forgive yourself. You made a mistake and hopefully u have learnt now that words should not just be spoken out of present anger. You do not know what tomorrow may bring. So many possibilities out there so forgive yourself and Co-parent your kids together. This is not the end of the world!

    ReplyDelete
  43. Poster run to God he is the only one that will turn your husband heart....this is pure temptation may the Almighty God see you through.

    ReplyDelete
  44. He gave you the house and two cars. Was he rich when he married you? He might think you married him because of the comfort he provides and has just been enduring him all these years. He might believe you spoke your truth in that moment of anger. He might even think for you to complain about his manhood, you might be cheating on him. Maybe he doesn't really wants the divorce, maybe he intentionally gave you the house and cars (which he presently suspect is the reason you married him), then offered you your freedom (divorce) to see if you truly love him or not.

    I think you should fight for your marriage with all you have, lf it eventually fall apart, you will know you gave it your best shot.

    What I feel you should do is; write him a letter,remind him of how you met, what attracted you to him. Tell him how you love his strength and respect his weakness. Make sure the letter is all about him and not what he can offer you. Let him know you see him. At no point should you try to defend yourself in this letter. (I suggested a letter and not call because he needs to decide when to read it; which is likely when he is in a calm mood. He will be able to read it repeatedly and hopefully, the message will be received by him). At no point should you mention the kids in the letter, it might make him feel you want him back because of the kids. Let him know the house and cars are useless to you without him in your life because he is all the home you need.

    Along with the letter, return the divorce papers unsigned. Let him know you are willing to give him a little space, but you are not giving up on your marriage.

    It is possible he just want you to fight for him. Fight for what you have. He needs convincing that he means a lot to you.

    Above all, ask for guidance from God. He alone can direct your path.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. You are both brilliant and blessed. I wouldn't have written anything if I had seen yours. I think she can work with this game plan.

      Delete
  45. Please do not sign that letter. Remember he won't remarry unless you sign. You are still going through a process that require a sholder to cry on not a letter to sign.
    you have to be physically and emotionally ready before you can sign anything if you wish. Get a legal advicer to help you to avoid making a mistake in your decission. The children need him more than you do. He just left the house to cool his head, He will come back. (maybe taking Jaruma product somewhere lol)I blame you for your actions but pls do NOT SIGN ANY LETTER. Your husband will come back, he is just testing your faith. Go to his family,his pastor and your family too. Confess to urself that your marriage is intact. GOD IS STILL IN THE RESTORATION BUSINESS, HE WILL NEVER PASS YOU BY. AMEN. i LOVE YOU MY DEAREST SIS. IT WILL END IN PRAISE. AMEN AND AMEN.

    ReplyDelete
  46. its so painful but all the same,does not what commitin suicide for.

    u have learnt from ur mistake cuz i noticed we men are at one moment or the other very mad at some words based on our ego.

    TO COME OUT STRAIGHT, A LADY HAS ONCE TOLD ME THAT MY DICK IS TOO BIG AND TOO LONG,THAT SHE CANT COPE WITH SUCH HEAVY LOAD WHICH MADE HER ABORTED MY BABY WITHOUT MY CONSENT,THIS IS SOMEONE I LOVE SO MUCH,THOUGH SHE HAS BEEN FORGIVEN BUT I STILL HAVE THAT WORD SO FRESH IN MY BRAIN

    ReplyDelete
  47. Dear poster your husband has a hard heart or strong heart which ever. Chai that was too much he took it too far. Just be calm pls don’t sign the divorce papers pls don’t sign it. And also he would later come back to his senses. Men like this get hurt maltreat their wives thinking it’s the right step and right move not knowing what’s waiting for them outside is even worse. Later after he has had bad experiences with all those crazy girls he would come back. I remember you said he use to tell you crazy things and this time he said it back to him and now this. He would come back after his senses comes back. Your husband is proud too. Don’t worry outside is never good when he has gotten a crazy taste of it he will be trying to see if you’re still very available. Calm down . Don’t be suicidal be would return.

    ReplyDelete
  48. This is a mess up situation.
    Truth is if am the man I will also filed for a divorce.

    Word killeth and maketh alive...
    How do i make love to you again when you have killed me from within.

    Even if the whole world are against us, our spouse is supposed to be our strenght and fortress...

    I left my ex without looking back because of his mouth. I loved him and adore him but i left him still! His mouth is poison he killed every iota of affection I had for him.

    We all should learn to speak carefully .
    we have two ears and one mouth for a reason.

    ReplyDelete
  49. Madam poster, I'm sure your husband has never asked God for forgiveness before??

    ReplyDelete
  50. Dear poster,even if he forgives you his mind will no longer be fully in the marriage anymore,he will be physically with u but emotionally absent and might start seeing someone else in the process.i suggest u forgive urself,bridle ur tongue and move on,words are like egg once broken can never ever be remolded.goodluck

    ReplyDelete
  51. When I read your previous chronicle, I thought you didn't sound at all remorseful and I said as much. However what's done is done. Trying to commit suicide means you don't want to bear the consequence of what you did. If you're truly repentant and remorseful, take this consequence with your chest.
    It is obvious that your husband's penis size is a huge source of insecurity for him and he thought he found someone who accepted him as he is in you, only for you to turn around and hurt him with that same insecurity.
    It will be hard to forget, but the onus lies on you to prove to him that you are sorry you hurt him and it will never happen again. Don't sign any divorce papers. Get someone he respects to beg him, infact send an entourage of elders to beg him, however let nobody hear what you said about his penis, just tell them you did something bad. I pray God restores your home

    ReplyDelete
  52. What makes him think the next woman he'd meet or marry wouldn't tell him his dick is small? Is that how he"d continue breaking up & divorcing? He had better accept himself the way he is & make the best out of it. This life is too short o. With the same small dick, he fathered two kids while there are men with monster dicks & yet can't do shit!

    ReplyDelete
  53. This not about unforgiveness, but rather the damage her words did to his self esteem. I am sure he married her because she never showed any sign that she is unsatisfied with the size of his manhood. She made him felt accepted I guess unlike others he dated previously. What she said, was not just an insult, but quite a true revelation of how she feels about him. And this was the shock that threw him off, because he thought that finally he has found a woman that accept him the way he his and love it small.

    After hearing what she said, he is now insecure and even if he didn’t ask for a divorce, things will never remain the same. From what she wrote, one can see he is well to do and has all of his self esteem in place. She might have just married him because he is a good man and can provide and not because she is ok with his J size.

    The women here screaming he is unforgiving, are the type that are mostly disrespectful and can often use words loosely without caring how the other person would feel. RESPECT is one of the most important virtue in marriage and unfortunately most uncultured women don’t have it.

    If you want a good man, develop yourself properly and reverb your mindset so you don’t end marrying someone just like you and then you will come here screaming men her scums.

    There are a lot of men haters (low budget feminist) on this blog and I pity any woman that takes their advice to heart.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. You are very rude. @ your third paragraph. Going about with useless generalization.

      He is hurt quite alright and she has apologised what else do you want? that she kill herself? She disrepected him and we already scolded her in her first chronicle she sent in. So she should now die and commit suicide because he has refused to forgive. Forgiveness is paramount in marriage and he is unforgiving. And as for you..Even in anon mode your rude and mannerless self shines through. How about you work on that.

      Delete
    2. No advice for the poster just insult left right and center. Judge judy we already know what the man must be feeling so stop rubbing it in.😏

      Delete
    3. Avenue what ever your name is?
      You are so ill-mannered and ver RUDE..Judge rinder!..

      Delete
    4. These are the kind of women I was referring to on this blog. Temperamental and antagonistic in nature. Learn from other peoples mistakes so you can save your self from some life dramas. Your likes were attacking the man for walking away because you all see things only from a woman's perspective (selfishly). Many of you are single/married and unhappy because of attitudes like this.

      Funny enough, he might have forgiven her, but that doesn't mean things will remain the same. Wonder who raise some of you. Men are not your problem, but yourselves. Some of you here cant even cohabited with your fellow women for a month because of attitude like this. I have said my piece, and I am certain the wise ones among you have pick a thing or two from it.

      Delete
  54. You want to commit suicide because you’re reaping the fruit of dishonoring your husband?

    If the penis was too small why did you allow him to use it impregnate you for those number of times?

    Contemplating suicide suggests you feel worthless without him and you can’t do without humiliating him when he’s with you at the same time.

    I can’t advice someone in your position,it would have been easier to talk with your husband because of the children involved in the marriage.

    Life and death is in the power of the tongue and they that love it shall eat the fruits thereof!

    ReplyDelete
  55. I and my ex had misunderstanding and he Doesn’t last in bed he also has a small penis. I insulted him a lot and he insulted me too. But guess what he wants to come back to me even after abusing his Small dick no bi small abusing oh. He doesn’t love u enough. N maybe he will come back.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Lol! This might also be true. I and my husband quarrel and say all sorts even threaten with divorce sef but after 2 days you will see us being affectionate as if we are newlyweds

      Delete
    2. Yea because he doesn’t want to go through all that nonsense with another woman so he figured he’ll settle with you since you know the size of his dick. And who knows maybe you care for him a bit more than his previous woman. We don’t know if posters hubby suffers emotional abuse at home. And even at that, you’re completely wrong for insulting that man’s penis. All shades of wrong.

      Delete
  56. What is all this talk about unforgiving spirit . Please you all should go do some research on ‘love language’ then come back and talk. He has issues with words. That’s what it is . Some people are like that . My husband will forgive you for sleeping with another man before he does if you say such to him. Telling a man he is weak and doesn’t satisfy you and has a small dick is a whole lot of talk plz. Let us be guided . She has been married long enough to know what is okay and what isn’t in her marriage . There is no manual to marriage or relationships . Each one is different and distinctive . She broke his spirit , that’s what happened . Some people can’t come back from that while same can . Abi you mentioned he cried bah,Well you clearly married a very sensitive man . You should know your husband well enough to know what you can do to win him back. Try that . If it doesn’t work , count your loses and move on.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Right! I don’t understand the talk about unforgiving spirit. In my opinion, insulting a man like that with his penis size is equivalent to a man I love insulting me with barrenness. These are things people can hardly change about themselves so they hurt so much.

      I used to tell my ex then to be careful with the things he says to me when we quarrel cos even when we are back on good terms, those things keep replaying in my head and they tend to do a number on one’s self esteem especially coming from someone you love and who you thought loved you

      Delete
    2. Thank you anon 18:34. She broke that guy and it can't be fixed. You should know who you are married to.
      Some of them are biased with their comments. It's a woman involved what do you expect?

      Sluttychic.

      Delete
  57. Please don't commit suicide, remember you have 2 kids to take of, nobody will take good care of your kids more than you do, you just have to be strong and move on with your life, it is not the end of the world for you.

    ReplyDelete
  58. Poster pull yourself together.Do not sign that divorce papers in fact shred it to piece. Whenever he calls or come around talk gently to him and make it known to him that he's still your husband and you're not divorcing him.
    You have to go explain yourself to his and your parents exactly what happened and beg them to help you beg him. If he still insist on divorce tell you can only allow separation and give him your own terms of what you know will make life comfortable for you and your kids

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. A man wants divorce you’re saying she can only allow separation. No be am do the damage? Poster you’ve had it in mind all along about not getting sexual satisfaction from him hence you couldn’t hold it anymore and he now he knows. Truth of the matter is, I don’t think you love him whole heartedly. You knew you’d be comfortable if you marry him but it’s not all about material things in a marriage. Some folks are saying keep begging him. But there shd also be a time when you’ll stop begging him if his mind is made up. You’ll stop begging him for your own mental sanity, for your own self worth so you can emotionally heal as this came as a rude shock to you. Truth of the matter is, he now knows what you really think about the size of his penis. Things might never be the same again even if he comes back and you just have to swallow that pill. Next time stick to your deal breakers some women don’t mind small penis and others do as sex matters to them in a marriage. From your chronicle, sex matters to you so why did you settle? Always follow your heart/deal breakers. If you commit suicide, then you’re a really selfish person. Your kids were not asked to be born for them to come and suffer in this world. so you are NOT going to commit suicide. And oh, if you do, remember there’s life after death. After this life, all these things won’t matter anymore. So brace yourself up and start mending your broken heart. With time and lots of tears and prayers, this too shall pass. I only pity the kids as kids need a father figure just as much as they need their mothers. Smh. Wishing you the best. I’m sure you’ve learned your lesson. I’m just so angry on your behalf. Stella please post.

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    2. I’m anon 21:12. Adding to my comment. I forgot to mention to make as much effort as you can. It will begin to give you closure as you know you’re doing your part. Someone mentioned writing a letter. I completely agreee to that suggestion. Take your time and write about how you value your relationship. Involve his parents and yours. If his mind is made up, give him some time, then try and try again. You’ll definitely know at some point when to stop begging him and cut communication with him for a long period of time so you’ll give him time and space to think things through. It’ll also give you time to really focus on yourself and the kids. Praying he’ll come back to his senses. Na wa for you sha madam. Sighhh.

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  59. what i see here is a man who's spirit has been shattered, this is not just about unforgiveness, poster you bruised his ego badly, even if you guys come back 2geda, things might not be thesame. we should all be guided on how to bridle our tongues. I pray God restores your home my dear sister. dont sign the papers yet, continue reaching out to him even if it means using your children to do so.

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  60. On a Goodday, I won’t encourage a third party for family ish, but this, since your mom is aware, can you call his parent? you don’t have to tell them exactly what it is but you can just let them know you offended your husband and because of that, he wants a divorce. The will scold you, but you’re telling them because you need your marriage, you need your family back. You were angry, and now you’re sorry. I’m positive, they will intervene and save your home, if they don’t, you’ve tried. For now, don’t sign any paper yet. And please if it works, don’t initiate any sex or whatever, let him heal.

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  61. What is domestic violence? I read it a lot on this blog that, so far there is no abuse(physically), then stay! Woman wey no fit beat man go dey insult his ego and manhood yet they ignorantly don't equate it to domestic violence! I was surprised to read all the comments here and saw no one talk about how damaging verbal abuse is and how tantamount it is to domestic violence. Maybe somebody isn't enabling such comments then!

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    1. You’re completely right sir and I’m a woman. I completely agree with you. Emotional abuse is worse!

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    2. From the first chronicle, it is obvious they were both verbally abusing each other severally until she hit this raw nerve. A really sad situation.

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  62. "Forgive us our sins, as we forgive those who sinned against us". This is the prayer, my people. Offense will come, we have to ask God for the grace to forgive. If this is how God holds our sins against us, then none will stand.

    Please Poster, don't commit suicide. Do the best you can and leave the rest to God. Remember, you have two children that needs you more than anyone else. God's grace

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    Replies
    1. 70x7 times according to Jesus, that's the amount of time one should forgive.

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    2. Make sure you don't sign the papers. Even if you appear in court tell the judge you want your marriage back. Give him like a year or more he will get back hopefully.

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  63. Hmm, I would like to hear your husband's side of the story...I'm sure he is gonna open a can of emotional abuse that has been ongoing.

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  64. The reason you stated is not enough to end a marriage. Maybe we don't know the full story or the man wants out, either way suicide is not the answer. Keep your head up. Remember you have two people solely dependent on you.

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  65. Anon 18:50 was as descriptive as possible. The man had insecurities. If you're a dude and you've ever had a woman gush over the size of your D or how she actually enjoys the way you fuck her. It's a thrill and makes the guy feel good.

    Not that that should be the most powerful emotion in the world but because you're not the one dealing with emotional trouble and insecurity makes it harder to understand why he will leave the house cos she mocked his love making and the size of his D.

    What if in his head he starts thinking so she has been getting dick outside since he has never been able to make her cum. She has a nasty tongue and that is the root of the matter.

    Even you women, when you catch your man cheating . Yes you forgive but somewhere in your heart you still look at him like "see this mumu, you think I've forgotten "

    She eviscerated the man and tore out his ego. Yes I hope he can still forgive her especially if she can show him she has been faithful even though she wasnt satisfied. You know how we men can't stand our women being fucked by other dudes.

    Women please dont use your caustic tongues to chase away good men. I'm talking this way cos na the woman shit for church.(thank God lol) Learn from her mistakes and make your relationship/home better. Some women are really something else though.smh

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  66. Effective Communication is very important in every type of relationship - marriage, relationship, work, parenting etc.

    Poster could have told her husband her concerns with his love-making in a better way earlier instead of bottling up her feelings and letting lose in a moment of anger.

    Ironically, it's not the size that satisfies a woman sexually but the man's expertise, care for his wife's needs and knowledge of her body.
    Some men that are well-endowed leave their wives sore and unsatisfied too.
    Above all when there is love between a couple, they rarely have this intimacy challenge.

    Nobody should tell anyone demeaning things whether your spouse, child, help, staff or subordinates.
    I don't understand why people are mean or say mean things to hurt others.

    Let's be godly - in your anger do not sin.

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  67. Madam pls stop begging him, get your groove back, try hang out with friends, go on holidays if you can afford it, start dressing very sharp, ignore him but pls don't sign the divorce papers at all, with time he will surely come around, the begging is making him to feel you can't do without him that's why he is punishing you so you will feel bad the way he has felt with your words

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