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Thursday, July 23, 2020

Chronicle Of Blog Visitor Narrative...

Hmmmmmmm....




STAND ALONE NARRATIVE
FARTING PROBLEM



Pls my people I have a problem and I need input abi advice..

Please is there a sickness or disease that will make one to be farting anyhow and the fart doesn't smell but one will just be farting.I don't no what's wrong with me,I fart like no man's business,even as i am typing this now I'm farting and the fart doesn't just come out poo but you will hear pratatata as if my pant is tearing it but the good thing is it doesn't smell.


In a day I can fart like 50 times.

My hubby is tired and it's so embarrassing.

my kids look at me somehow.my little kid ask me the other day if I ate something that's making me fart always,and that I should go for fart competition and I will come first. 

Pls bv's am I normal or something is wrong with me..Please help me...




*To Fart up to 50 times a day and its odourless show you might be eating something that is causing it..You might want to study what you eat properly....Otherwise you seek medical help to find out why there is so much air in your stomach.

90 comments:

  1. Replies
    1. It’s definitely a digestive problem. You can start by taking probiotic supplements and see if it helps. If not, see a doctor.

      Delete
    2. πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚ See the Doctor mbok

      Delete
    3. You could be lactose intolerant. Check your diet in relation to the fat.

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    4. Endeavor to reduce the consumption of sugary foods.

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    5. Go to the hospital. Abi you wan drink agbo?

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  2. I am sorry poster, permit me to laugh πŸ˜€πŸ˜ƒπŸ˜„πŸ˜ƒ.
    Poster please try to see your doctor, he/she might help with this.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I fart through my veejay but no sound. But don't know the cause.
      Started recently..am scared
      Will soon visit the clinic

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    2. Farting via vjay? No be childbirth cause'am?

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    3. Na Childbirth cause am @ Mao.

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    4. Childbirth or serious masturbation esp pillow grinding

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  3. 😁😁

    So during bed breaking sessions, u fart too?

    I can imagine d sound, pra pra praa..

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. πŸ˜‚πŸ€£πŸ˜‚πŸ€£πŸ˜‚πŸ€£

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    2. πŸ˜†πŸ˜…πŸ˜†bad child

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    3. πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚bb u funny sha

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    4. Kpo pra kaprata tete

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    5. Shild of the world, you have joined bad geng

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    6. You people will not kill me with laughter. πŸ˜…

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    7. fuuuuuuuuuuuuu(silent smelly one in btwn) then a loud one after kpraaaaaaaaaa! a hard slap landed on the back of poster’s neck after all that farting 🀣 Poster sorry take probiotics to build up your good bacteria and watch what you eat!

      Delete
  4. Maybe you should see your doctor, could be gas issue


    Poster call me πŸ€™

    ReplyDelete
  5. You have PhD in farting πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚
    Who do you like this?
    Go see a doctor and also, try to control it. Bad habit. When you have visitors, does it happen too? How about market place, malls, church?
    Abi na only house you dey do am?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Jeez Anon. Someone has a medical condition, and you say it's "bad habit". πŸ™„πŸ™„πŸ™„πŸ™„

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    2. Valid questions. Does it happen everywhere or just your home?

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    3. Everything is a bad habit to you faceless anon. Absence of farting that can even cause illness if it doesn't exit the body on time.

      Poster, visit your doctor, please.

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  6. People get different problem for this world sha

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. As in don my good friend πŸ˜‚πŸ€£πŸ€£πŸ€—.. Otooto logun (problem different true true).

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    2. @Tade Adeaola, I recognized🀣 Thanks to a dear friend.

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  7. 🀣🀣🀣🀣 please forgive me laughing cus i find this so hilarious.

    Over to those who can help.

    Tbabe

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hope you did hot water sit bath very well during your kids omugwo? I’m saying this because I’ve heard stories like this relating to it as the course of excess farting.
      If it’s not a medical problem then may Jesus fix it.

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    2. Hot water sit bath if not properly done can cause it.

      Maybe you can do what Jada Pinkett did to get her bomb V after kids bearing

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  8. You didn't state how long you've had this issue. Anyway, if you just started experiencing it please seek medical attention asap.

    ReplyDelete
  9. Maybe you should see a doctor. I don't think it's normal to fart so much, everyday.

    Kids are funny. Saying you should go for fart competition got me laughing.. Sorry

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. πŸ˜…πŸ˜‚πŸ˜†πŸ˜‚ funny kids

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    2. Wetin concern themπŸ˜†πŸ˜ƒπŸ˜€

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  10. Poster sorry I have to πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚ your chronicle is so funny. I had a roommate back then in school that usually fart anyhow even when she is sleeping that only happens once she eat beans. The babe will not stop eating beans since it makes her to fart, she will eat beans and disturb us with fart throughout the night.

    You should check what you eat.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies

    1. A friend of mine then...she farts whenever she sleeps..
      When she leaves my house. I always wash my bedspread.

      Poster I pray you get a solution to your problem

      Delete
  11. oh my! Sorry but this is funny. Did you say non stop fart?and you little kid too didn't help matters by saying if you go for farting competition you'll win but poor kid is right. Have you gone to the hospital to make proper inquiry?maybe you should

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  12. Pls ma, you need to visit the hospital. Children are the fastest news carriers, I know what I'm saying.

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  13. I had to πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚ poster,I'm sorry! Seek medical help as Stella advised

    ReplyDelete
  14. Did you in any way come across your ex that you broke his heart before you got married?
    If yes, then know he has went back and picked up your case file and looked into it again.
    If No, follow Stella's advice.

    ReplyDelete
  15. Poster, try read up on excessive flatulence.

    ReplyDelete
  16. Poster, go and see your gynaecologist.

    If you started farting continuously after you started having kids, then, something is wrong with your body system. Your body system may have been compromised somehow.

    It is not normal to be farting continuously like that, it is air you're releasing and the air is either forming or getting through your body system when its not supposed to.

    ReplyDelete
  17. Hahahahahahahahahahababaha
    I have laughed soooo much my children are looking at me like "mummy ogini?"

    My dear you have excess gas in your stomach. See a doc to take care of it

    ReplyDelete
  18. I'm not sure if it's a medical issue,I had a roommate in school, anything time she takes evaporated milk, we're in for reckless fart,mine is fried egusi soup with much onion,it makes me release toxic bomb while a family member of mine must not take pounded yam, the whole house is in trouble,she releases pungent fart.
    pay attention to what you consume

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  19. HeheheπŸ˜€πŸ˜€ waiting we no go read for this blog again? Let me sit down and read comments as I don't have idea regarding this...

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  20. Hello Poster.
    - do you chew gum a lot? It has an impact on gas accumulation, and this will show by farting or belching more frequently.
    - do you take a lot of milk or yogurt? That also has an impact.
    These are things that I have noted affect me too. You can also pay more attention your foods and see if there is anything that triggers it more.
    What if you do a detox? Even if a simple one that includes lemon, ginger and garlic. If all else fails, speak to a doctor.
    Pending when the problem is actually solved, you can get up and go somewhere else to fart so it’s a private affair. You can also reposition yourself so it comes out quietly, since it doesn’t stink. Pele dear, I can imagine how exasperating this is for you.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Exactly, she needs to review her diet, foods like milk and beans makes one fart. Drink lots of water and cut out fizzy drinks.

      If you try this and there is no improvement, run to the hospital.

      Delete
  21. Cleanse your systems -fasting + water, like morning till evening for weeks.
    Then, stop eating refrigerated things and refined sugars. Substitute with natural honey or cane juice crystals.
    When cooking e.g. beans, soak it and remove the husk or covering.
    Above all, make sure that Jesus is your Lord.
    🀸🏻‍♀️🀸🏻‍♀️🀸🏻‍♀️🀸🏻‍♀️🀸🏻‍♀️🀸🏻‍♀️🀸🏻‍♀️🀸🏻‍♀️🀸🏻‍♀️🀸🏻‍♀️🀸🏻‍♀️🀸🏻‍♀️🀸🏻‍♀️🀸🏻‍♀️

    ReplyDelete
  22. seems like IBS. Irritable bowel syndrome which i suffer from. Look at your diet and make a diary note of what you eat. My GP prescribed some satchets for me which i was taking and it worked for while till i statred to suffer side effects of water retention on my feet. My GP has interest in complementary therapy and so suggested i take Kale leaves first thing in the morning (he advised to blend with bananas or strawberries cos of its taste)
    ANyhoo, that was 10 years ago and i religiously blend kale every morning before eating anything, sometimes it serves as my breakfast and has drastically reduced my farting episodes.. when i go without my kale for about a week i begin to fart again and feel bloated...and bloating but seek medical advise.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks Sylvia I appreciate.

      Delete
    2. Thanks Sylvia I appreciate.

      Delete
  23. Do you consume much milk every morning. Your Tommy is always bloated. Purge your system then if it does not stop, consult your doctor.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Was going to ask a similar question. Poster could you be lactose intolerant?

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  24. πŸ˜†πŸ˜…πŸ˜‚ SorryπŸ€£πŸ˜„πŸ˜ƒπŸ˜€πŸ˜€ had to laugh... Nothing Musa no go see for gate... But wait is that it comes out uncontrollably or you set bum and release it? Does it happen in public? I don't even know what to say sef🚢🚢🚢🚢🚢

    ReplyDelete
  25. Oh Lord!

    I desperately hate it when people fart anyhow. It is so irritating to me. I have never imagined that it could be a health issue.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Kami I don't like it too but I can't help it..when I'm where I can't let it out my stomach will be bloated

      Delete
  26. It's village people.read Psalm 499.

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  27. I think this has to do with suturing after you had your baby.

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  28. Fartomania! Ewoo! You guys should be doing farting competition!! I think you should check what you eat or are you a fast eater cause you might be taking a whole lot of air whilst eating..I had a colleague that can belch for Africa..I was forced to ask her if she eats air..I find your chronicle funny..*farts out of post*

    ReplyDelete
  29. I noticed the same issue shortly after the CS I did the first time exactly the way you described it. I complained and I was given geluse(don't know if the spelling is correct) and it stopped. I did the 2nd CS recently and the farting has started again. Go to the hospital.

    ReplyDelete
  30. Most women Gary U controllably when they get to manopause stage, my mother does this alot but if you feel like farting kindly go to a private place and do it

    ReplyDelete
  31. See a doctor please. It is well with you.

    ReplyDelete
  32. Dear poster, mix ginger and lemon in hot water and drink

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  33. Eku farting..o🀣🀣🀣🀣🀣🀣
    Sorry see a doctor

    ReplyDelete
  34. I laughed so much that my children started looking at me. You need to visit the hospital...

    ReplyDelete
  35. Thank God it is not a smelly fart. Ee get why🚢🚢🚢🚢

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  36. Do you have ulcer? If you do, that's the reason why you are farting uncontrollably.

    If you don't have ulcer, then watch what you eat. Certain foods and fruits cause farting e.g milk, yoghurt, cheese, banana, apple, peach, beans etc.

    Proteinous foods are known to cause farting, so limit your intake of them.

    I'd suggest you see your doctor if it continues.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. No I don't have ulcer.. thanks for ur inputs

      Delete
  37. Poster you need to see a doctor. I think the didn't stitch you up well after your last baby.

    ReplyDelete
  38. Poster, you need to see a doctor
    It is well with you.

    ReplyDelete
  39. Poster, pls detox your body. Use lemon, ginger and garlic. Grind them and soak for 2days. Afterwards be taking morning and night.

    ReplyDelete
  40. When did this start? Did it start after having kids, or it has always been there? Farting uncontrollably has been associated with childbirth. check foods you eat that causes gas production and cut down on them and the internet is your friend; research about the condition and you can see a doctor

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hmmm, child birth cured my own frequent farting. Immediately I had my first son, I stopped farting except I am in the toilet to poo or wee. I can't explain but I am relieved and happy.

      Delete
  41. It is well with u Ma, to d hospital asap. I fart bt nt dis much biko.

    ReplyDelete
  42. Crazyhornywife23 July 2020 at 17:04

    Eliminate regular milk from ur diet, drink lactose free milk. Don't eat ice cream,cheese cake and its family.
    Also beans makes me fart so might wantu check it out.
    Big hug and nothing is wrong with you!!

    ReplyDelete
  43. When I saw this chronicle I thought it was my partner (fiancΓ©) that sent it until I realised it was sent by a woman. Half way into our relationship after he had proposed I noticed that this guys farts a lot & a lot even while sleeping, it doesn’t just come silent but with very loud sound and stinks uncontrollably. It so much affected our relationship because I’m someone that can’t stand bad smell esp when it happening every second. We couldn’t cuddle up without a stinky smell coming through. The worst was that he snores and farts loudly all through the night that I wouldn’t have no single rest. It was really tiring & I had to question myself if this what I’m gonna live with for the rest of my life. I had to persuade him to go see the doctor or we’ll be over.... Infact story for another day.

    ReplyDelete
  44. First like many BVs has said before it may be as a result of CS or the kind of food you eat depending on when it started.

    But on the other side of it, if this is a kind of habit you enjoyed doing like a sort of prank or for the fun of it which made it get out oh hand, then u can stop it by being conscious of it.

    All u have to do, tell yourself u want to stop the habit. Anytime u feel like doing it, try to control it, dont make it so loud or doing it at all time when u feel the urge to, Try to suppress the urge at times. with time you and your body will become used to releasing less frequent gas.

    Good luck to u as u find a remedy to this.

    ReplyDelete
  45. Did you recently put to bed? My mom told me that if you are not properly stitched after episiotomy, it could result to uncontrollable farting.
    I was not properly stitched, so I do get this occasional fart like things. But mine is mostly when I'm not wearing pants.

    I cant stand the pains of restitching, so I didn't go back when I noticed it. It will be corrected during my next delivery.

    If same is your problem, it means yours is severe and would need attention soonest.

    Just use small mirror and check down there or see a gyno

    ReplyDelete
  46. Stella thanks so much for posting this..I'm the poster.
    No the fart doesn't come uncontrollably..I'll feel the urge to do it.if I'm at home,I let it all out or where no one will hear d sound..like market or even church during praise and worship..after all it doesn't smell.
    Yes it started after I gave birth.
    Thanks everyone for ur advise I'm taking notes

    ReplyDelete
  47. Lol, I don't think anything is wrong with you oo, but it doesn't mean you should rule out seeing a doctor, my youngest brother has the same issue too, Although he's a teenager, he doesn't even care about his farting, He will just be farting anyhow , par patatta kpopo, during morning devotion, sometimes the fart could be distracting, as we dey kabash, this boy dey busy dey release fart anointing. I think, i will take him to see a doctor tooπŸ€”πŸ€”

    ReplyDelete
  48. See all of them pretending as if they dont fart.πŸ™„

    Poster how regularly do you go to the toilet in a day? Because I used fart several times in a day but when started using the toilet often, I discovered that it has reduced drastically.

    Also take like 2 glasses of water first thing in the morning after brushing. It will help promote bowel movement and also cleanse your system.

    ReplyDelete
  49. You're lactose intolerant. See a doctor to know what to do

    ReplyDelete
  50. It’s acid reflux. Take omeprazole

    ReplyDelete
  51. Dear Poster, you'll be fine. I had such condition after I gave birth. I was farting uncontrollably like you. Kprakpra sound and mostly odorless. It was so embarrassing.

    As Stella said, check what you are eating. I later discovered it was the chocolate drink (tea) I was drinking then that was causing it. Once I drank it, it was farting galore. I changed brand to milo and it stopped.

    So check the things you eat regularly and start eliminating them one by one. You'll soon know the culprit.

    ReplyDelete
  52. sorry poster but u have Ulcer, it happened to my friend before, weather its gastric Ulcer or so i have forgoten the name. try see doctor.

    ReplyDelete

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