“ The first thing we should understand is that everybody just wants to be happy. I think people should work towards whatever it takes to achieve happiness. Sometimes , it goes through, and sometimes , it falls through and the spouses would have to go their separate ways .
I don’ t believe that two people would come together with the aim that some years down the line , they would have a divorce . However, as time goes on, they would realise that there are differences they cannot handle . They would have thought they could but it may not work out and they would have to go their separate ways . In some cases , that is the safer option and everybody would be happy.
“ It is not just about being tolerant; it is also about being understanding , and knowing what one's breaking point is. I have not ‘met ’ my breaking point. But, I have had challenges in my marriage . There are times I upset my husband and there are times he upsets me. Through it all , we both have not reached our breaking points . We are still at the point where it is okay for us to have misunderstandings . We correct the mistake and keep moving . We have done that for 10 years. ”
Regarding people that share their love lives and relationships on social media, the former Miss Ebony Beauty said , “ Whatever works for one. My husband is not a public person . I respect his personality the way he respects mine , and that works for us. ”
“ It is not just about being tolerant; it is also about being understanding , and knowing what one's breaking point is. I have not ‘met ’ my breaking point. But, I have had challenges in my marriage . There are times I upset my husband and there are times he upsets me. Through it all , we both have not reached our breaking points . We are still at the point where it is okay for us to have misunderstandings . We correct the mistake and keep moving . We have done that for 10 years. ”
Regarding people that share their love lives and relationships on social media, the former Miss Ebony Beauty said , “ Whatever works for one. My husband is not a public person . I respect his personality the way he respects mine , and that works for us. ”
*Hmmmmmmmmmm
Won de oo..awon marriage counsellor 😏😏
ReplyDeleteGbam!
DeleteYou see, when people bring marital problems to me or post on this blog, one thing I know in my heart of hearts is that there is no offence under the sun that can not be forgiven. That said, it is very important to understand that every human has a capacity/limit. As much as some offences may appear heinous to you, there are people who can take it and get through it. There are many men and women who have tolerated a cheating and lazy, dirty spouses. A cheating or a lazy spouse may be a no no for you but don't be quick to suggest divorce to someone who has not reached his/her limit. Untill it comes from within that individual, he/She will regret the decision. When someone comes to you at breaking point and needs strength to leave, then by all means, support him or her. Don't insist he/She goes back to endure for their mental and physical well being. The only ones you should be quick to suggest separation to is when violence is involved.
Marriage is not that serious and difficult. Men especially are mostly the cause of high divorce rate... I know some women too are not good. Some men have this mentality of "my wife is ment to worship me and do as I say".
ReplyDeleteDoesn't work that way anymore... women are now wiser and better. My husband understands that very well... infact, he is a feminist (according to people)
Women. Always blaming men for all relationship woes since 1860. Even when the subject has nothing to do with men...you will still drag men into it. Mtschew.
DeleteThe older I become. The more I see through a lot of women's attempt to be the innocent one in every relationship woes while.men are the guilty part.
Very well said.
ReplyDeleteLove you UM but your husband is a white man and not the typical Nigerian man that others deal with, though still a man but...
ReplyDeleteWhite men divorce Nigerian ladies too. Ask Kate Henshaw
DeleteDidn't know white men were infallible.. How come they have such high divorce rates?
Delete" I respect his personality the way he respects mine , and that works for us. ”
ReplyDeleteYen yen yen!
Some be married for 8 years and be marriage counselor.
#hiss
Hope you know the breaking point of Peace Anyiam Osigwe's "PAIN" in her marriage is still tied to you.
Ndi uwa bu foto, onye noi ta osi photographer sebe sebe.
#anotherhiss
Na wa o😲😲,
DeleteHappy belated birthday to yours!
She done piss Xp off🤣🤣 Ufuoma look what you done😠
DeleteNo mind 'em. Married for less than 15 years and they will be giving counsel upandan. I will only listen to those people that have reached 18years and above
DeleteNice outfit,and thanks for sharing.
ReplyDeleteBia Stella why the long Hmmmmmm with an asterisk at beginning?
ReplyDeleteMarraige is an institution that God almighty created. Only him has the formula, as he created us in his own image but so freaking different from each other.
Then it more complex with Satan's role to undermine the marriage institution.
Na only God dey see people through abeg.
Well, to Mr. & Mrs. McDermott I say congratulations on hitting that 10yr mark and counting while forging forward & upward. May God give all the grace in marraige till till.
She married a white man. White men don't stress you.A white man won't jump from one skirt to another. Our Naija men are the culprits
ReplyDeleteAhn ahn. White men no dey divorce ni
Delete@10:57, apparently you know nothing. Just find a decent disciplined man. Whether black or white.That's the koko. White men that are promiscuous.
DeleteAnon 10:57am ask Kate Henshaw.
DeleteMakes sense! May you never reach your breaking point and me too. Marriage is not a joke.
ReplyDeleteWhatever works for one is the only thing I'm picking from this write up.
ReplyDeleteDo not tell couples to go their separate ways, you did not join them and you should not. 🙄🙄🙄🙄
ReplyDeleteWhat do you know? If it is a life threatening situation nko?
DeleteAbeg rest!
ReplyDeleteMarriage has no manual,rules or restrictions.
What works for me may not work for you and vice versa.
God bless you pinklady, everyday one advise or another. Abeg
Delete@Pinklady
DeleteMarriages have a manual -the Bible
The maker of marriage, the one who instituted marriage,
Inspired the writers. Study it. It is the manual of life.
Every marriage with their different challenges. Just know how to manage it.
ReplyDeleteThis comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeleteShe has not said anything wrong. She has also not imposed her 'personal marriage secrets' on anyone. She said 'do what works for you and respect each other'. These are the basic advice we need even in our relationships with random people. So why are people hating? She also said if it doesn't work out, leave for the sake of your happiness. What again should she have said to please you people? It's like people just read to criticize (if they read at all), not to understand.
ReplyDeleteStella, I don't understand that your 'hmmmm'
Well as longs as it works for you
ReplyDeleteOk
ReplyDeleteThere’s no advice to marriage my dearest. Whatever rocks your boat go for it. For the fact that hers is still intact doesn’t mean that someone else is doing wrong. First she’s married to a shire guy who probably lives a different lifestyle like her making it easier for the both to navigate through marriage. I’m married too to a white guy and I’ll tell you, it’s been something from a fairytale, we’ve been together forever, I’m the one who’s on social media and in his case no such things doesn’t interest him and I don’t share my relationship on sm only those who know me very well, know that I’m taken but that being said boys and girls do whatever rocks your boat and makes you happy. Navigate your life the way you want and be strong enough to bear the consequences when it goes left.
ReplyDelete