Stella Dimoko Korkus.com: Saturday In House Gists - When You Realized Your EX Was 'One Chance'

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Saturday, February 13, 2021

Saturday In House Gists - When You Realized Your EX Was 'One Chance'

 Some of you are thankful today because you dodged a bullet by not marrying that ex that you thought you could not live without....






Some of you are still in that relationship and thinking your life will come to a halt if the relationship breaks, you are seeing the signs already but scared to let go...

Those of you that walked out of relationships and Marriages that you thought you could not live without, what was the deal breaker? When did you realize you had to abort the ship?

When did the word 'One chance' occur to you? were you supported by family and friends? did you have to relocate? changed residence?

Lets gist!

107 comments:

  1. I walked away from a relationship after the guy tried to strangle me. DV and cheating in a relationship are deal breakers for me.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Why will someone wants to strangle my sweet candy, so sorry dear

      Delete
    2. Bini dearie, thank God ooo.
      Blacky dearie, he was an insecure person.

      Delete
    3. When he told me he had more important things to think about than marriage. This was someone who told me he wanted to settle down with me and I told him to give me 2 years to be financially stable since I was just starting my career. After 1 year of dating, all oga talked about was going abroad. So when I asked him about settling down and he gave me that response, I moved on. He came back to beg but I felt he was using me to pass time pending when he can relocate out of the country. I'm happy I left because the next man I dated after leaving him is my husband.

      Delete
  2. I met someone in the from West who showed interest in me. When I asked him what are we doing or what we want out of what we're doing cos feelings were involved. Dude said "Let's see how everything unfolds with time but he wants us to be pretty close for now. No defining anything just that.

    I figured that was one chance if I continued Or was I wrong. Should I have waited to see how it all unfolds with time. Time wasters are plenty these days.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. you are not wrong ..I know when you haven't seen other guy at the moment it will feel like a mistake but its good that you ask directly the direction of the relationship

      Delete
    2. You should have waited to see if his attraction was more of sexual which end goal is Sex or LOVE which is oriented towards maintaining a relationship, to keeping a strong connection defined by closeness and shared lives.
      Well, we live a tragic, too-late, after-the-fact life, learning what is right only after the time for acting rightly has passed.
      Going forward, RELAX if you find him attractive and take your time to know him better. If sex occurs in the process, who knows, it can increase his openness to share his feelings, sacrifice, want closeness, and engage in caring communication. You never know unless you try.

      Delete
    3. Rockstar ure so matured and u make sense die.like I said,we meaning u and I mid each oda.

      Delete
  3. He asked me to buy a bag for his mum.idid.she called to thank me and was using a pet name to call me. It was only aft the got married that I discovered it's his present wife's nickname. M u won't see the face of God I swear.

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    Replies
    1. Mogbe, u say wetin, eeeyah sorry darling u will be alright. Don't mind the hediot just forget him already stop cursing him. Urs is coming,

      Delete
    2. When I say I don't spend money or give money to guys this is why I say it. At least I make sure he is spending more than I spend on him to avoid feeling pains in case of incasity later. Sorry dear

      Delete
    3. @anon 16:24 but you can collect money and be spent on abi? You need to understand that being in a relationship should be mutually symbiotic, where you support and help each other. It should be beneficial to both parties not one person focused on gaining more. Learn to be selfless in your relationship. If it works out, fine, if it doesn't move on without regrets cos you'd know you gave your best. I dont understand how you'd say you love someone and will be counting things you do for the person or weighing how much. If you feel that who you're dating isn't giving 100% please move on instead of calculating expenses and inhibiting yourself. Abi do you really think that a classy man who gets you luxury gifts will be happy getting cheap knockoffs? Lol, joker.

      Delete
  4. Just recently, someone very close to me was arranging her trad. She told me to invite my friend, Francis Odega as MC. And my wife to go and price Aso-Ebi at Idumota. She said she met the bobo on Facebook and he is coming to marry her once he lands from USA for the first time. She said he owns a big supermarket in U.S, he is building and estate in Lagos, etc. But when he landed in Nigeria, drugs were planted on him so he wants the young girl to send N 150,000 to immigration to free him so he can come and marry her.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. lol...one chance

      Delete
    2. Na todayπŸ€£πŸ€£πŸ€£πŸ˜…

      One chance

      Delete
    3. Lol..
      This one na normal yahoo format nah.. they call it arrival scam.. that 150k was her first billing, if she had paid, a 2nd billing would follow immediately.. and it keeps going until she gets wise or go broke..

      It's mostly greedy people that fall for romance scam, they're hoping to enjoy from all the largesse the scammer told or has showed them he has.. that's how they'll enter one chance because of long throat.

      Contentment is everything

      Delete
  5. After our first child I realized I have entered one chance marriage, I started plotting my move cos my family do not believe in divorce. While plotting my move another Belle enter. I was stuck for life as my family who refused me to leave after one child will disown me if I ever think about leaving with second child on the way. Thank God for my ex shooting himself thinking he was humiliating me. Baba didn't realize I was done with the marriage, was only there cos of our first child and upcoming baby. He left and I redisgned my life. My family self were shock at how I recover so fast. I even bought a car to celebrate my freedom. My pple had no choice to support me knowing that I was not a liability as that was there fear. I stayed put in the apartment as the humiliations my ex made me go through made me shameless. Am I happy? Yes I am cos I don't have any body on my neck anymore all in the name of marriage. I later change apartment as he kept spying on me. I am so fulfilled all I hope is to relocate from naija as soon as possible.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. So happy for you sweetheart.You gracefully won. 🀝😘

      Delete
  6. I walked away after I found out the guy came to harvest where he did not sow. Friends and family supported my decision.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. So many guys like that these days. What's up with that mindset. I just tell them I can't feel turned on by a guy who asks me for money

      Delete
    2. @anon 16:26 the questions is, do you have money? You don't get turned on cos once you see your partner needs an assist you develop a headache due to being broke.

      Delete
  7. He asked me to give him money, I gave him £500 and he said it was too small. That he needed £2k. He didn’t talk to me for 2 weeks. Didn’t even say thank you.

    He then started stealing money from my wallet and would lie he didn’t, even though I lived alone and he was the only one that visited me.

    I would withdraw money on my way back from work and the next day, it would be short and he would say maybe they stole the money at the office. 🀦🏾‍♀️.

    He loaned money from me and told me he kept it on top of the fridge for me. When I told him I didn’t see it, he said maybe the wind blew it away.


    Final straw as when he used my details to collect Wonga payday loans and I was alerted as my credit rating went down. I denied opening it and they brought cctv and it was him. Because I didn’t authorise it, I was exonerated and he was made to pay immediately.

    When I broke up with him, the stupid guy told me that I should please loan him money to pay his rent, that his housemates would throw him out.

    All these happened within 3 months.

    He’s still going around parading himself as a london big boy.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Chaiiii.....why are London boys especially so useless like dis. Many love living off women. ThankGod u learnt your lesson.
      Before i settled down i saw all sorts too. Once a man starts asking me for money like dis,dats a huge RED FLAG. I just cut off. 3months and dis one has done so much damage. Nawa

      Delete
    2. Chai Uk based women!! the kind of leech men that surround you all is something else ..imagine a date stealing from your purse like a robber ...Loneliness and cold weather makes uk ladies wish for companionship and sometimes end up with this terrible leeches ..abeg its better to be on your own than this

      Delete
    3. I met alot of fckboys here in uk but because im stingy with my pussy I have enough time to see there true colour. Now am done with broke guys.

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    4. Don't know why most of them are so shamelessly lazy. My dear congratulations on your breaking free from an unapologetic leech.

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    5. I’m sure he’s from south London na barawos full there.

      Delete
    6. Where do you guys meet these leaches in the UK!!! I live in the uk and I have never ever given a guy my money ever infact I don’t even meet or date broke ass fuck boys. I’m also very stingy with the P and team celibate. Yet they won’t leave me alone I currently have 2 on my whatsap that I have left on unread; I have a bf and I’m happy with him.

      Delete
    7. They bring that mentality with them to naija it seems. I met one like that who schooled over there and now lives here. The guy shamelessly asks for money and has no qualms about living off women, bragging about how he has women that feed him so I better sit up. I just told him "when u finish chopping them I will collect my share from u, shikena. I no dey give man money" he never hexperredit oπŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚ me wey no well before. They expect u to compete to see who is the biggest spender and biggest giver to a man but one shishi like this they won't give. And those guys know how to demand wetin pass their own contribution to the relationship. Shey na ment??London girls dey try o

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    8. What an ole!

      Such a lying liar, wind blew money off fridge,omg!
      πŸ˜‚

      Delete
    9. Uk boys sha πŸ˜’πŸ™„met one that quit his job ,by the following week he's asking to borrow 100 pounds . I ran

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    10. Wind blew money then it flew off the window ba? Haha. The guy na street.

      Delete
    11. Anon 14.27 πŸ˜…πŸ˜…πŸ˜…πŸ€£πŸ€£ sorry for the laugh,I've heard this story before,is this your useless boyfriend's name Yomi aka Adisa aka,Idris,he lives in that place that starts with a B in London.taaaaa some men are shameless.I saw the guy and I wonder what they see in him,not pleasant in looks at all πŸ˜‚πŸ€£πŸ€£πŸ€£πŸ€£I'm enjoying this post.Stella can sha be interesting,how do you come up with all these your posts,you are very unique and good with what you do.πŸ‘πŸ‘πŸ‘

      Delete
  8. I disclosed everything about me to him. My earnings, salary, business and investment. Not much but mine, however he was always bringing one business idea or another. Which were great and I encouraged him and helped to finance one or two things not major things. He's always saying should invest with him, but since he knew my financial situation he knows I don't have enough money to invest infact all my salary and savings combined no make sense. I honestly didn't think much of it until one day I asked him where he expected me to get money to invest when he knows my financial situation. Na so d guy talk say what about my father's will? Ha, the thing shock me no be small. I've never discussed my father with him because my father was already late by the time I met him. I didn't know abroadian guys were gold diggers too. My affection for him just went from 100 to zero. I really loved him but the feeling wasn't mutual and he was only after whatever he thought my father left me. My people some guys dey research into your family o, be guided.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. why do guys that meet a financially stable lady suddenly develop business idea that he didn't have before he met that lady ...Abeg ladies dont fall for that scam anymore they will show you business plan and start crying about money give them the address of the nearest bank for loan

      Delete
    2. Very shameless.
      The only thing I hate more than an entitled female is an entitled male.

      Those bringing up business idea is very common here with our 'independent' ladies.. it's another scam move.. maybe we should call it 'investment scam'πŸ˜ƒ.. when I just hear it now, I advise them to go to a financial institution for loan.. stupid scammers.. if you assist, the investment you no go see, them fit even block you or might keep you around telling you many scam stories to get more money.. yahoo yahoo girls and boys doing local scam everywhere

      Delete
    3. U see! Yesterday people were advising a lady that she did wrong by not investing in a guy's business ideas.someone that was gonna use her. Now I feel a bit better like I made a good decision too.

      Delete
  9. I ended the relationship when she told me she wanted to be a baby girl for life and marry a rich man so she can be a trophy wife, that to her was a life dream. i dodge chakabullaa not just bullet.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Not the type of woman you need in your life. Thank God she didn't hide it from you so it wouldn't be too late for you 🀝.

      Delete
    2. There's someone for everyone.. that she was outside your budget doesn't mean u dodged a bullet or she won't be ideal for another man. Some men want trophy wives too and will be more than capable of handling her billings

      Delete
    3. Reminds me of a movie i saw just this morning, Nancy Isime walked out on her marriage with Freddie Leonard because he lost his job and decided to pursue his passion.

      She wanted to be Oriaku.

      Delete
  10. He felt he was always right, even if he was completely wrong. There was no reasoning with him. No ambition or quest for knowledge.

    As long as he was able to play video games, he was happy. Even if he owed the whole world and couldn’t pay rent.

    ReplyDelete
  11. He told me that after I got the promotion and salary increase I was expecting, he wouldn’t need to work. I laughed, thinking he was joking but he was completely serious. He then provided a detailed plan of how we were going to do it and how we would reduce spending and all, showing he had really thought about it. I was working extra shifts at work so I could take care of myself and also send money to my parents while he was busy thinking of how to depend on me forever.

    Even on top of the promotion, his plans included me still working extra shifts o, while he did nothing.
    That he will take care of the kids.

    We had already fixed the introduction but I told my parents to cancel it. My parents were sad at first, but when I told them the reason, they called his parents that same day to cancel.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Lol.. Sorry..
      So you don see wetin we men dey face for many useless girls hand.. you dey hustle to make cash, she dey hustle on making plans to chop your cash, asin na we be her own hustle..
      Very nonsense way of reasoning..

      Delete
    2. @dante please loud it!!!

      Delete
    3. Sorry babe. He would have used your money to be spending on other girls while u work like a slave to fund his womanising ways. U did good. An idle man is a cheating man cus men think of sex 24/7

      Delete
  12. He was only interested in “get rich quick” schemes.

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    Replies
    1. I avoided these ones like kilode when i was single.

      I couldn't stand fraudster either.

      Delete
  13. When i realised my ex married me because I worked in a Bank. Mehn, I suffered. I didn't know i was marrying an alcoholic. When we were dating, he was very nice and religious. After marriage, he showed me pepper. He would come back home 3am every morning drunk. I remember those days I sat at the window throughout the night worried sick after calling him 1000 times without him picking. I would still leave for work 5am after chopping beating for complaining. Stress almost killed me.

    What about trying for a baby? I spent all my savings on medical fees. He didn't spend 50 kobo.
    You know what I did? I planned my exit very well. I travelled to go study, he didn't know I was running away.

    I sent him a divorce letter few weeks ago and he has been begging. His family members are calling too to tell me to let him come join me. He will change.
    I moved on already. My baby is almost here sef. Turned out it was stress that didn't let me get pregnant.
    To everyone out there in a bad relationship or marriage, please take a bold step. You only live once. Find your happiness. You can be happy alone. People will judge you especially your church members, ignore them. Find your happiness.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. This your story get as e be.. seem like you cheated while married and is trying to justify it.. omo.. you're on your own on this

      Delete
    2. Shut up Dante!! Use your head...the one on your shoulders to read and understand and not the one between your legs.

      Delete
    3. anon glad u took charge of your life. Love and lightπŸ’•

      Delete
    4. Thumbs up baby.
      Don't know why people are very particular about what their church members will say? Hian.
      Some will frown and call you greedy that you have a good job here why relocate, even when he's almost killing you? Good run you did.

      Change location,change church. New friends, new joy.
      Everyone becomes happy.

      Delete
  14. The deal breaker was when he got drunk and started doing street racing with his friends , while I was still in the car with him . I begged him to stop and he wouldn’t listen, I promised God if I made it out of that car alive I will dump his sorry Ass . When I came to pick my things from his house after I dumped him he almost beat me up . I never actually thought he was the one though , dude was very short and had bad temper . I didn’t think he was capable of DV until that day , dude was a woman beater waiting to be unleashed. I avoid short men like a plague, this was the first short guy I was meeting with anger and self esteem issues . I wasn’t the one that made you short , ka kosara Chi go biko .

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚. Short men? Fear them!
      Very stubborn wicked insecured set of people that will always want to remind you with their actions that you can't intimidate them because of their heightsπŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ€£. Hope he didn't succeed on beating you nne? Ehh let him go and complain to his God ojare, no be you do am at all. Inukwa racing with his friends while drunk, did he forget you were in the car? πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚.

      Delete
    2. He wanted to pour his mkpu mkpu frustrations on you sis🀣🀣🀣🀣🀣

      They are so handful eh.

      Delete
    3. Short guys ehn. Lol I used to form height doesn't matter but omo short guys are something else. Part of the things chasing women away is that complex n not even height. And they can require validation ehn. That's why they cheat a lot

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    4. What pains me is that they're always the richer ones in a group.

      I hide my dislike around them, that time I'll just be whistling within while you do the toasting.

      I hate hot temper even in females, talkless of men.
      Hmmmmm.

      Delete
  15. I snooped and found out he was cheating. turned out Had been inviting different girls to his place. Even church members and he was a leader in the church. Very committed, doesn't miss any church activities and can sew his past card as seed. I was shocked by what I saw on his phone, not one,but more than 7 different girls, very nasty chats, especially the church girls I know that knew we were together shock me pass.
    I just ghosted him after that. No need to waste my precious energy asking the wandering dick anything because he would have probably said it was because I denied him sex in the relationship. I simply deleted him from my life like he never even existed. I was heart broken but we move.
    I thanked my God I hadn't even introduced him to parents yet cuz he had being pressuring for a while for us to start marriage plans but I told him I was still praying about it.
    #teamsnoopforever
    #teamsnoopforlife
    #snoopingsavedme
    #snoopsnoopsnoopandsnoopsomemore

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Church uncles and aunties? Fear them! Trust and believe them at your own peril. In them lies pretence, fakeries, wickedness, never admitting to be wrong and always finding Bible verse or character to use in justifying their evil actions.

      The shits these brothers and sisters do in the church ehh, especially the choir members? lol.

      Delete
    2. Oshey.. snoop dogg

      From my experience, people see things the way they are (subjective view) and not the way they are (objective view). What you see in others exist in you. Most people who see people as fraudsters, without the person giving them reason to are fraudsters themselves. Most people who see their partner as cheat, when the partner hasn't given them reason to, are cheat themselves.
      Many years ago, one took my phone and was reading my messages, I pretended to be asleep but was just watching her, she saw a happy new month message I sent to a childhood friend who we haven't seen in years, and I ended the message with 'miss you'... she started crying, after dropping my phone back silently beside me.. now 'woke' me up that she's leaving. Asked her what the problem was, she refused talking.. told her to wipe her tears first so people won't think I hit or rape her when she leaves my home in tears.. as she wipe her Tears finish.. I let her go.. Later in the night, she called explaining what she saw.. I just hanged up when she said she snooped on phone without my consent. Later sha we settled after she apologized and understood she was wrong for snooping and jumping to conclusions.
      I then invited her over the next day.. bought night train drink.. she was enjoying herself.. na so I drag her blackberry phone from her hand as she was chagging.. come and see fight to collect the phone back.. story Lol.. I say we go both read her chats together.. she come begin confess say make we no read say e get 2 guys weh she just dey chop their money, say one na yahoo boys, the other one live close to her home, say if I read the chat I go believe say she dey date them.. I say no wahala make we read.. guess what, one of the guys was actually lodged in a guest house waiting for her and she told him she'll be with him in few hours, he even bought her ice cream and stuff that she asked for.. imagine oh.. for someone that was crying after reading an harmless message on my phone.. I come ask am why she dey cry the other day when it's now obvious she's seeing other guys.. guess what the nonsense girls said- "you have a strong mind oh, you are not even angry".. ode.. why I go vex.. no be friend with benefit we be before.. na you just go dey catch feelings..

      So all I'm trying to say is that most people who snoop without the partner given then reason to, are themselves hiding things.. it's the reflection of themselves they see in others..

      If I catch anyone snooping on my phone, I fit deck am.. there are a lot of personal informations, friends, family and work privileged communication that are there, shared to me in confidence.. are you mad? You think my life revolves around you? You no go even try am again for your life after I'm through with you

      Delete
    3. My ex was a church guy too. Those types can use Jesus to cover their atrocities ehn. Same as yours. Never missing midweek service and Sunday service. House on the rock was his favourite hang out spot uno That was his thing. Weyrey will be asking me to attend as per come closer to God with me. I didn't know that this "Jesus favourite son" was gbenshing almost all his female friends behind my back. And these are the same people that will be awwing and tapping when he posts my picture o. . I snooped once n saw a chat where he was telling one girl that her bum bum had grown bigger than last time. I still mumuly stayed after confronting him. Dunno how I believed the bullshit he told me to make me stay. Maybe desperation and laziness of having to start all over again in dating market. Jesus son that likes to bend someone's daughter in different positions and likes being sucked dry. Lmao. I should have known something was off

      Delete
    4. Chisom I learnt my lesson after that, I dear church people now pass Yahoo boys and runs girls,


      Dante- someone that has nothing to hide does not get so annoyed or bothered over their partner snooping. There's a reason it's called intimate relationship you know. If I'm to trust you to the extent of marriage, I need you to be clean and transparent with me.
      Awon deck master, continue till you meet your match that will beat you up and fill your mouth with sand. Shameless woman beater.
      Hi Xhlrted P, hope you are doing good.

      Delete
    5. Yvonne O
      "If I catch anyone snooping on my phone, I fit deck am.. there are a lot of personal informations, friends, family and work privileged communication that are there, shared to me in confidence.. are you mad? You think my life revolves around you? You no go even try am again for your life after I'm through with you".

      I had to crop out the last paragraph for you so you can read it clearly and understand.

      1. I said anyone.. where did you see I was particular about female? Anyone.. Don't be silly Okay.. I'm not the kind of guy you do that nonsense with.. you should say shameless stupid people beater, not woman beater.. cos I said I'll deck the stupid person that would try that..

      2. So because we're in an intimate relationship you must know communications that was shared with me by clients.. do you have an idea of what is called privileged communication? These are communication that are shared in confidence.. it's guided under the rule of confidentiality. You you know one can lose his practising license just cos someone else got knowledge of that information all in the name of snooping e.g communication between doctor and patient, lawyer and client etc etc.. what about stuff my friend might be telling me about his home, family or financial issues which he shared in confidence,. What of family discussions.. how does being in relationship entitle you to such information..

      You better use your head and think well.. it's this same over sabi behavior that made you fall for the fake born again guy.. na people weh dey deceive una and tell una lies una dey like.. continue.. it's like you haven't learnt your lessons yet..

      Snoop dogg.. you for kuku go join DSS nah.. spy camera

      Delete
  16. The DEAL BREAKER for me was when I stopped doing a lot of things that I liked doing and that there was an inability to communicate respectfully, amicably and productively.
    She also acting all too independent for me (We both have corporate jobs though she makes more money at the moment) and making comments about important issues that I hold dear and my desire to have my OWN BIOLOGOCAL kids made me question our long-term compatibility)
    Sat down with her one morning and told her that I was never going to come back again - i left for work and never came back.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. What do you mean acting all too independent? You were threatened by the fact that she was earning more money than you! Fool!!!

      Delete
    2. Anon don't mind him. It's good riddance to the poor woman. If they ask for money Wahala now this one isn't asking and is independent his insecurities won't let him appreciate the asset he landed. Hopefully shes with a better partner

      Delete
    3. So u were dating someone that was your elder in every single way (biological kids) yet u thought it would turn out right. I bet she was giving u money

      Delete
    4. @annnymous, Seems the word 'Independent' rubbed you off the wrong way. No I wasn't threatened at all. We both finished graduate school together, though working in different industries. I make good enough money and can take very good care of myself. She just happened to earn more as at then which wasn't a big deal.

      @Yvonne, Insecurity was far from it - we both have different goals and future aspirations which was fair enough. And the moment our vision no longer align, I left. We are both happy in our current situations now.

      @Anonymous, there's nothing wrong in dating a woman who's older as long as she has sense. I don't age discriminate.

      Delete
    5. Thank God you finally got your own accommodation.

      Delete
    6. @Anonymous 18.35, it's not unusual for lovers to cohabit in my side of the world.
      I got a job in her city, moved in with her which made good economic sense while saving up for my own apartment. That's what lovers do.
      And when the love no longer served us, I quietly left.
      Like I said, when VISION no longer aligns, you move on without rancour or bitterness.
      That's what adults do.

      Delete
    7. Rockstar, you are a user period!
      You moved in with a woman while saving up for your own apartment? Lol
      You used her to save for accommodation whilst being a burden on her...guess what, that made her resent you because she is probably older and more mature and knew you were using her!
      As soon as you finished using her to save up, you left because you never loved her
      I repeat, you are selfish and you are a user
      Grow some balls and be a man please
      If I were her, I would throw you out!!!

      Delete
    8. Lmaooooooo@ 'that's what lovers do...'thats what adults do...'

      That's what USERS DO boy.

      You don't know how super nauseating you sound, and everyone is probably super tired and can't be bothered.

      Grow up boy!...that's what babies do!!!!

      Delete
  17. When she would sneak out 2am to go sleep with his married girlfriend who had 2 kids and her husband was based abroad.
    He would wake up at night and sneak out.
    Men sha.
    Found her wedding ring in his bathroom on one of my visits.
    This was a r/ship of 10 yrs. I had to swallow the hardest pill and move on.
    He is married now to one of the many patients he was sleeping with. I hope he is happy wherever he is.

    ReplyDelete
  18. My own is if you can't handle the situation anymore, whether relationship or marriage pls leave. For present and future sanity.

    ReplyDelete
  19. I learnt he was playing games when his words did not match his actions. Trust your instincts. God is merciful and would show you. God revealed all the games he would play in the dream to me, but love carried me. When everything played out in front of me I had to listen to God and end it. I missed him, but it's for the better.I trust God to lead me to the right one for me.

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  20. Hummmm London boys are fucking gigolos! If I start to write what I went through in the hands of one bastard 2 years ago, I won’t finish
    This guy basically almost ruined me to the extent he will ask me to send him money for lunch at work! He moved in with me eventually and did not help me with 1p of the bills. I felt like I was looking after a child, I kicked him out. This bastard will ask me for money and get upset if I said I did not have.
    Never in my life will I date down again, Infact if I don’t meet a financially stable guy , let marriage fuck itself
    Enough is enough!!!

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    1. Uk guys are the worst and I will say it again like I said above where do you guys meet these leaches. I live outside London and I have never come across any leaches just fuckboys that can’t hold body but never broke ass idiots they treat me well just the sex is the issue for them so I keep it moving but I’m in a relationship now.

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    2. @anon participate in valentine single and mingle you never know. But hold your purse not too tight because of past experience,you see real love is give and take o. No release pass £20/50 for important things. God will give you a self sufficient husband this yr in Jesus name amen ❤️

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    3. Same table. I dated down before and it was hell. a Lagos yoruba guy at that. Again I met this former London based igbo guy recently and omo this guy is shameless defined when it comes to asking women for money. He prides himself on being a loser fed by women, that is the disturbing part to me. It's like he doesn't know how much it spoils his fineness when he asks for money n I trust mumu naija girls once they see fine boy, na to start opening buka and standing as human atm. Thankfully I learned my lesson from the first guy so I told this guy straight up I don't give men money or feed men. Once I do, no chance of sucky fucky cus my puna gets dry every time money leaves my account to go to a man's own much less a man that is trying to smash. Lmaoo. If ur hands are itching u to give a man money, give money to your brothers, sons or father pls. At least u can be sure of returned favour. These men out here will just smash u, eat ur money n use the change to grow relationship with another girl. I don warn una enough

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  21. Are BVs deliberately going anon on this one? 🀷‍♀️

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  22. ...when he told me to borrow $6,000 from my father for him to do a masters programme in the US and then, I will come and join him; Since my daddy is rich. This was me looking for how to ask my father to support me for my masters programme oo. Next thing, be started hitting small small (that's how it starts; small hitting here and there). Finally, he told me that he can make my life miserable. When I gently mentioned that the next time he hits me, he will never see me again, he said when we are married, I can try that. But I should know that I coming into the marriage with nothing and I will go with nothing even if there are children. Then I knew this was a spurn of a demon. Left his house that day, and never saw him again. Moved to a new place. He tried reaching me repeatedly. Never again. I won't even wish this kind of person on someone I hate. A man that took pleasure in telling me that he could make my life miserable. I jump am pass!

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  23. My own be say I dodge big time bullet. Dude was introduced to me as a born again Christian. MFM fire. Macaulay na real time Narcissist. He started giving me relationship constitution. Dude says I must kneel down to greet his friends. Chai. Limit communicating with my sis, talks down at me. Guy man no get respect at all. I just think he had serious bipolar cos normal human being can't behave the way he did. I forgot , He lies like no man's business. I thank God everyday for saving me that big time manipulator. Trying to convince me to have sex with him after 31 years of keeping myself. Guy man said he wants to put cap. Lol. Wereeeee. Cap ko, hat ni. I couldn't cope with him for two months. Omo. Dumped him like a pack of card.

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  24. Mine was when he went on and on about how I am forming miss independent and was not asking him for money or requesting for gifts from him. Then went on to accuse me of cheating. I just moved on and never looked back

    P1
    I met this guy a few weeks after I moved to a new country as a diplomat. I was really excited to meet another Nigerian so soon and he was also from my part of the country. I initially started hanging out with him as brother and then he kept on asking me out and he is a nice guy so why not? I am someone who is very content with what I have and I don't see relationships as avenues to acquire wealth. I was also new in this relationship business. I was 25 and he was in his mid 30s (I actually found out he was almost 40 much later). When we met he had told me this story of how he was to get married that December (we met in early November) to some Nigerian babe and cancelled because the girl and her parents kept on billing him for every family issues. Like even after he had done all the traditional rites and payment, he was constantly being asked to bring huge amounts of money for one thing or the other. I never commented on that story cos it's none of my business but he made it sound like all girls are after is his money. I never found out really how rich he was until much 2 months after I met him. He owns a road frieght company with his own trucks and had a chieftancy in his village. I had seen pictures of him in a lovely home which he initially told me was the a friend's house only to find out it was his. I am not moved by money one bit so in all his stories about how girls are after his money I was like what is my own. I got lucky right after graduation and had had great jobs and exposure which led to me having such an amazing job so young. The guy is a really nice guy and we were generally ok for a bout 4 months. Within this time, he really got to know more about my job and after a while, the stories about girls and his money stopped. I also never had a need to ask for anything. We hung out a lot after work and weekends, he took me to nice restaurants and all. And took me shopping once to buy a pair of trousers. Trouble started when he returned from a short trip to Nigeria. My birthday is in February and I had invited some new friends I had made to celebrate with me and eat Nigerian cuisine everyone had been asking for. I actually mentioned it to him the day I made up my mind to have people over and he said nothing. The weekend I wanted to go shopping, I called him to ask for where I could buy ingredients, uncle flipped o that has he given me permission? I was really confused. Permission to have my friends over? He went on to ask me whose money I was using to buy the things, I said mine, that it's really a small group of people so it won't cost a lot. Then came many minutes of how i am acting independent because I dont ask him for money or gifts. I really didn't know what to say because this is somebody that for over a month I met him was all about how girls want his money. I just kept quite and let him vent. When he finished, I asked if I could continue with my thing he said yes that he will get me my birthday cake. 2 weeks after the birthday, out of the blues, this guy started this independence talk again. This time I asked him to explain in details what he meant by me being independent. He kept revolving around me not asking for money or anything. Independent in the sense that I sort any money problems I have myself... I still refused to ask for money because i didn't see the need and it's not like I had refused any gift he got me or any monetary offer. The issue is that he had never made any offer to me. So I decided to really have this 'independent' conversation.

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  25. P2
    So I decided to really have this 'independent' conversation. When I had met this guy newly, he was very impressed with the fact that I was able to take care of my self away from home, he was impressed with my job and we had talked about my career progression then and I ofcos told him all my big plans. Then he had said that he was drawn to the fact that I could take care of my self and had plans. He had talked and talked about me using my pharmacy licence to open a pharmacy for himself but my visa wont allow it and I said no. He was all about me improving myself to advance career wise. So with this 'independence' talk I asked him about all those things he said them about women working and all, uncle said no that he is all for it until it is time for marriage, the person has to quit the job and he will take care of her. That once we get married, I will stop my job and stay home as he wants to have many children. That he said all those things then for me to agree.This was also when he revealed his real age. That should have been my exit cue but I continued o. My sister even advised me then to take a walk, I was doing lovey lovey.He then started complaining about me working too much, the job that brought me to this country o. I was beginning to take on more responsibilities and taking lead on projects. 'Long hours' was my usual 8 to 5 o but I was really busy responding to an outbreak which also brought me in contact with senior government officials but I was spending all my free hours with him. The day I said enough is enough is the day I had a working late lunch with the team I was planning an event with and he came into the place. When I saw him, i went over to say hi and then to introduce him to the people I am with and uncle said that I was cheating on him with my ' office boyfriend'. We were a group of 7 ( 4 men and 3 women) some whom he had actually met before. I explain tire ( he knew about the project we were working on) and he refused to agree o. I just told him I was done with the relationship. I may take his senseless and baseless 'independence ' arguments but I won't let him accuse me of cheating. That was it o.

    I didn't hear from him for close to 2 months and he calls me one day saying that I am proud and stubborn. That I could not even call to apologise for over 2 months. That can't somebody joke with me again. Me that has moved on since! I said apologise for wetin. He knows he was just being malicious and I moved on since. He kept on calling o that he wants us to continue. After a while it turned to marriage proposal. For where?. The man get mind to tell me that how can a titled man be begging me like this and I am doing Shakara.... a whole Chief like him! He got really annoying that I had to block him and I then moved houses. He has his good qualities but his spec is out there, he should keep looking.

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    Replies
    1. Anon part 1&2 let me advise you as a big sister you see generally men hate independent women . Some men are providers so if you find such men pls adapt . If you find ones that like miss independent adapt. Life doesn’t have one rule we must adapt same way we adapt to our environment. A lady sent a chronicle here how her husband left her because of this independent business. I still feel you should give the guy another chance. All the best

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    2. I love your story. I also like how you write. ❤️

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    3. anon 7:39 me I'm looking for a man with provider mindset o. this is after dealing with men that enjoy taking my money n then possibly spending money on other ladies but when it comes to spending on me he is "broke". I think most men like to feel like they are making a huge chunk of the bacon without feeling a woman just likes them for their money. Balance

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    4. Anon 07:39, why does she have to adapt to what a man likes, not what she likes?

      So she should go back to the guy, quit her job to raise a family while the guy continues with his? Her stay on the country she is in is based on her job. She should throw away a chance of a citizenship in a country for a guy that obviously her toxic masculinity?

      The earlier Nigerian women realised there is more to life than men and marriage, the better The man is just threatened and trying to suppress her.

      A lot of men like independent women. I married one of them and my brother is also one of them.

      My dear, please you did well to let him go. Men that are not threatened by your success will come.

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  26. I dodged a low self esteem and a sex frick. Someone that was making love to me on one occasion that i was so weak and ill. I passed out in the middle on the process,he poured me water, revived me and parted my legs immediately to continue f**king . I was weak, couldn't move. I summoned the courage to finally leave him. left for my cousin's to change environment cos he kept stalking me. On that trip i met my darling hubby. Gentle, sweet in and out.

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    Replies
    1. I met someone with similar style. The guy is a rough rider,whenever he sleeps with me going out the following day becomes a problem, serious body ache. Though he's very generous but he's style can damage the pus$$y moreover he's a married man

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  27. If only i had read somewhere about UK guys i won't have wasted two years

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    Replies
    1. My dear, better late than never.

      UK guys no be am at all.

      Delete
  28. Most BVs writes well. Pls Stella can you tell your BVs to shade more light on this their deal breakers. We can learn from it.

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    Replies
    1. Honestly, I'm charmed. Very intelligent Bvs here.

      Delete
  29. I had a terrible relationship with an ex but was able to escape on time.

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  30. I realised my ex-hubby was one chance AFTER I married him. His family were excited for us to get married and I didn't know it was because they needed a new victim.
    That's how he revealed that his family was so toxic, his youngest sibling fled from the family, while in University and changed his name and number to be inaccessible to them. Stella, this people did not report to any authority and in over a year of courtship, no-one mentioned him. I thought they were just 3 siblings not 4. They act like he never existed.
    Fast forward to hubby always checking my phone for bank details and asking for loans till its empty, locking me indoors and if I step outside to spread the laundry and greet a neighbour, he locks me out too.
    When I was pregnant, this man would use up all the water and go off. I'd have to ask the gate man to get me water to bathe. He ignored me throughout the pregnancy, mostly ignored our child from its birth and threatened to kill me.
    I ctrl-alt-del all the love I had for him and left with my child. I am ever so grateful I did. Now, we can go on to have a happy and fulfilled life with Christ, while my psychopath ex-husband c.e rots in his misery.

    ReplyDelete

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